Overheard at Work

[Apples]

I have a fairly new CW who wants to own his own shop someday to fix cars, and more specifically all types of race cars.  Based on his previous work this is not crazy.  But he makes $12/hr here and each year can basically plan to get a 3% raise, which is usually all this company does.  He then goes out to eat ALL THE TIME.  And not good food-all types of fast food and gas station food.  He plans to buy a four wheeler soon.  And then he says he'll "someday" have enough money to open this shop, but right now he doesn't have any money to save.  But on the bright side, he just used a 50% off coupon to buy $12,000 worth of good tools for only $6,000.  And he says the payment plan has a pretty low interest rate!  I really like this guy, but oh my goodness.

[AlanStache]

I have a fairly new CW who wants to own his own shop someday to fix cars, and more specifically all types of race cars.  Based on his previous work this is not crazy.  But he makes $12/hr here and each year can basically plan to get a 3% raise, which is usually all this company does.  He then goes out to eat ALL THE TIME.  And not good food-all types of fast food and gas station food.  He plans to buy a four wheeler soon.  And then he says he'll "someday" have enough money to open this shop, but right now he doesn't have any money to save.  But on the bright side, he just used a 50% off coupon to buy $12,000 worth of good tools for only $6,000.  And he says the payment plan has a pretty low interest rate!  I really like this guy, but oh my goodness.

I hope these are tools for a side gig that will have some cash flow with minimal other expenses?  Any hope of this side gig organically growing to full time for him?

[MandalayVA]

My office is located in, shall we say, an urban area.  As a result many of the entry-level kids have been fully indoctrinated into the bling lifestyle and I routinely see people whom I know very well don't make much more than ten bucks an hour wearing shoes or carrying purses that cost more than my mortgage payment.  I know a girl who bought an $800 Coach bag ... in which to carry her dog.

[Pooperman]

I was talking to a coworker (and aspiring mustachian) today. She is pretty new to the company. She was saying that at her old work, a coworker told her that she "got high from:" (makes a credit card swiping motion). She thought it was absurd as I did, but there you go.

[johnny847]

I was talking to a coworker (and aspiring mustachian) today. She is pretty new to the company. She was saying that at her old work, a coworker told her that she "got high from:" (makes a credit card swiping motion). She thought it was absurd as I did, but there you go.

Haha whats the coworker going to do when chip and pin becomes prevalent in the US? No more swiping!

[Hunny156]

Two co-workers are headed to the corporate office for a few days, which is a 3 hour drive away.  The amount of planning going into this is INSANE, but I suspect that in their department, this ridiculous level of micro-management is their version of job security.

We are allowed to rent a car, drive our own car and get the per/mile rate, or if available, we can borrow a handful of pool cars here.  They are choosing the latter option.  Earlier today, they received notice of what vehicle has been made available for their trip.  They requested a towncar, and were horrified to learn that they had been assigned a 2006 FORD EXPLORER!!!  The female co-worker loudly exclaimed - that's way older than even my car!  She drives a pretty late model Honda Accord, and she's financed to the hilt.

I laughed to myself as I thought about my awesome, mint condition 01 Accord.  She must see me pull out of the parking lot and think I'm destitute.

I hope their trip to the corporate office is OK, seeing as how the company felt it acceptable to put them in an 8 year old SUV to make the three hour trip on paved roads.  Oh, the horror of it all!

[marty998]

I was talking to a coworker (and aspiring mustachian) today. She is pretty new to the company. She was saying that at her old work, a coworker told her that she "got high from:" (makes a credit card swiping motion). She thought it was absurd as I did, but there you go.

Haha whats the coworker going to do when chip and pin becomes prevalent in the US? No more swiping!

Lol yeah, I was about to say who swipes anymore. Then I recalled, US banks are a long way behind the times, a result of having no cash to invest in tech.

Cards will disappear soon enough. In the not too distant future, payments through phone apps linked to your credit and debit cards will overtake regular credit card transactions in volume down here.

[johnny847]

I was talking to a coworker (and aspiring mustachian) today. She is pretty new to the company. She was saying that at her old work, a coworker told her that she "got high from:" (makes a credit card swiping motion). She thought it was absurd as I did, but there you go.

Haha whats the coworker going to do when chip and pin becomes prevalent in the US? No more swiping!

Lol yeah, I was about to say who swipes anymore. Then I recalled, US banks are a long way behind the times, a result of having no cash to invest in tech.

Cards will disappear soon enough. In the not too distant future, payments through phone apps linked to your credit and debit cards will overtake regular credit card transactions in volume down here.

I'm pretty sure all the merchants would have to foot at least some of the bill to get the new chip and pin machines. And the banks have plenty of cash to invest in tech--some of them just don't want to spend the money.

[Cheddar Stacker]

I was talking to a coworker (and aspiring mustachian) today. She is pretty new to the company. She was saying that at her old work, a coworker told her that she "got high from:" (makes a credit card swiping motion). She thought it was absurd as I did, but there you go.

Haha whats the coworker going to do when chip and pin becomes prevalent in the US? No more swiping!

Lol yeah, I was about to say who swipes anymore. Then I recalled, US banks are a long way behind the times, a result of having no cash to invest in tech.

Cards will disappear soon enough. In the not too distant future, payments through phone apps linked to your credit and debit cards will overtake regular credit card transactions in volume down here.

I'm pretty sure all the merchants would have to foot at least some of the bill to get the new chip and pin machines. And the banks have plenty of cash to invest in tech--some of them just don't want to spend the money.

Because they have to pay dividends to their investors, the mustachians.

[Anatidae V]

I was talking to a coworker (and aspiring mustachian) today. She is pretty new to the company. She was saying that at her old work, a coworker told her that she "got high from:" (makes a credit card swiping motion). She thought it was absurd as I did, but there you go.

Haha whats the coworker going to do when chip and pin becomes prevalent in the US? No more swiping!

Lol yeah, I was about to say who swipes anymore. Then I recalled, US banks are a long way behind the times, a result of having no cash to invest in tech.

Cards will disappear soon enough. In the not too distant future, payments through phone apps linked to your credit and debit cards will overtake regular credit card transactions in volume down here.

I'm pretty sure all the merchants would have to foot at least some of the bill to get the new chip and pin machines. And the banks have plenty of cash to invest in tech--some of them just don't want to spend the money.

Because they have to pay dividends to their investors, the mustachians.

Hmm, in a lot of places now I swipe my card on the PayPass card-reader. And the US still doesn't even have chips?

[AlanStache]

I was talking to a coworker (and aspiring mustachian) today. She is pretty new to the company. She was saying that at her old work, a coworker told her that she "got high from:" (makes a credit card swiping motion). She thought it was absurd as I did, but there you go.

Haha whats the coworker going to do when chip and pin becomes prevalent in the US? No more swiping!

Lol yeah, I was about to say who swipes anymore. Then I recalled, US banks are a long way behind the times, a result of having no cash to invest in tech.

Cards will disappear soon enough. In the not too distant future, payments through phone apps linked to your credit and debit cards will overtake regular credit card transactions in volume down here.

I'm pretty sure all the merchants would have to foot at least some of the bill to get the new chip and pin machines. And the banks have plenty of cash to invest in tech--some of them just don't want to spend the money.

Because they have to pay dividends to their investors, the mustachians.

Hmm, in a lot of places now I swipe my card on the PayPass card-reader. And the US still doesn't even have chips?

I think chip readers on the cc will be required in 2015 some time, but yes we dont have chips now.  Here merchants are required to buy the cc scaner and there are about 1000 different companies that operate between the cc 'swipe' and applying it to your account (only one handles a given transaction but is messy).  Not sure if our chipped cards will be compatible with the rest of the worlds chipped cards, would be nice.

US coworker went to Europe recently and did not get any cash because his card had a chip in it so he planned on only using that, well it was not compatible with the local readers.  Ended up having to barrow cash.

[Cheddar Stacker]

FYI folks, 6 months ago after another big fraud (target I think) made a few companies go the chip route. I have a chase card with a chip. I still have 2 swipe it everywhere except walmart which invested in the chip reader.

[Argyle]

I've never been anywhere in Europe where they couldn't swipe the card or enter the number by hand.  It's inconvenient not to have a chip, but not impossible to find places to use your card.

[Malaysia41]

By the time my daughter finished gymnastics, I was paying just under $600/month - training at 20 hours per week.  But thankfully she's now moved off to university and so she's quit gymnastics.

I can so relate, but with dance.  My daughter just started college, and I think it will be cheaper than her dance "career" from age 5 to 18.

I promise I'm not being judgy; I'm just trying to understand. When you were in the middle of the gymnastic and dancing, what was the end goal? What was the hoped for result that would make the expense and effort worthwhile?

Wrist tendinitis for life?  That was my end result.

But it appears those gymnastics lessons created absolute beauty for the people watching these pros:

http://sfglobe.com/?id=2530

[resy]

Wanted to tell him that there's a problem spending all of your life earning a living if you never get around to actually living, but I thought better.

But what is "actually living", anyway?  Why is whatever you do when you're not working more "living" than what you do when working? 

Certainly some of the things people have suggested as alternative uses for their time, like full-time travel or spending lots of time with kids, would bore the crap out of me.

Not to judge too strongly, but if spending time with your kids bore you, perhaps you should not have bred in the first place. ;)

Thats judging strongly lol i have a kid, adore him and spend lots of time with him but there comes a point where enough is enough. In fairness though I am a closet introvert and need quiet periods throughout my day or evening to keep me sane

[Lindy]

My first post!  My coworker was telling me how she was shopping for new makeup at Ulta and when the cashier was done totaling up her purchases it was around $800.  She was a little shocked at the price, but paid it anyways.  She told herself it was good makeup and she would use it all.  When she saw my shocked face she explained that it wasn't just makeup, but really good makeup brushes also. 

[Albert]

US coworker went to Europe recently and did not get any cash because his card had a chip in it so he planned on only using that, well it was not compatible with the local readers.  Ended up having to barrow cash.

Inexperienced traveler. Whenever you travel abroad for any serious length of time take a couple hundred dollars or euros with you in addition to several cards. You don't have to spend it, but just in case...

[Albert]

I've never been anywhere in Europe where they couldn't swipe the card or enter the number by hand.  It's inconvenient not to have a chip, but not impossible to find places to use your card.

True, but I think you'd have trouble buying train tickets here without a proper card or cash. Most stations only have ticket machines and no human operators around.

[AlanStache]

I've never been anywhere in Europe where they couldn't swipe the card or enter the number by hand.  It's inconvenient not to have a chip, but not impossible to find places to use your card.

True, but I think you'd have trouble buying train tickets here without a proper card or cash. Most stations only have ticket machines and no human operators around.

I never fly without ~300$ worth of local currency in my pocket when I board the plane.  Big hotels, gas stations near the airport and the like will take US cards but not the local grocery store or Subway sandwich shop. 

[deedeezee]

My first post!  My coworker was telling me how she was shopping for new makeup at Ulta and when the cashier was done totaling up her purchases it was around $800.  She was a little shocked at the price, but paid it anyways.  She told herself it was good makeup and she would use it all.  When she saw my shocked face she explained that it wasn't just makeup, but really good makeup brushes also.

I love makeup/skincare/haircare, and I love Ulta/Sephora, and even I would have said, deadpan, "you are kidding, right?"  $800 is ludicrous for an annual budget.  For a one-time visit, it is truly, spectacularly, insane.  Wow.

[Elderwood17]

My first post!  My coworker was telling me how she was shopping for new makeup at Ulta and when the cashier was done totaling up her purchases it was around $800.  She was a little shocked at the price, but paid it anyways.  She told herself it was good makeup and she would use it all.  When she saw my shocked face she explained that it wasn't just makeup, but really good makeup brushes also.

Welcome to the boards!  As a guy I refrain from commenting on this topic but once a co-worker came in gushing about her weekend at a spa, the manicure, pedicure, whole works and then said how her facial was $xxx number of dollars but so worth it.  Another, older lady who is very refined looking in a classic, non glitzy way stopped, looked at her intently and said " you spent $xxx on a facial?  Honey, you need to ask for a refund" and walked away.  I had to leave before I busted a gut!

[Hedge_87]

So one of my coworkers bought a new f250 diesel truck. Drover it to work every day for a while. All of a sudden he starts hitching a ride with his girlfriend. I thought to my self maybe this is the first small step in the right direction. Nope he shows up yesterday all smiles and says "Thank god its payday now I can afford to tag my truck and I won't have to bum rides with cindy".

[CabinetGuy]

Finally have one.  I'm a custom cabinet installer, so it can be a solitary existence on the job site.  I'm either alone most of the time, or working with ESL painters (English second language.) 

However, the other day I had the unfortunate privilege of working with another installer.  I've known this guy for years, and I'm not a fan of his.  But I digress...As a custom cabinet installer, I've learned the hard way over the years to buy quality tools that will last.  Higher up front cost (mitigated by using CL, but less likely to have to replace.). His near constant remarks of calling me "big money" and "I wish I could afford your nice Festools" are, somewhat ironically, followed up by telling me he "Just got his old boat back" (he had to sell it when the economy tanked).  And he followed that up by telling me he and his buddy are going halves on a new 24' center console boat.  "The payment is only 250.00! (Over ten years, mind you.) "That's only 125.00 a month since we're splitting the payments."

Oh, and this is so the same guy that's had to find work out of state because he had to chase money elsewhere because he didn't have the savings to weather the downturn...

I'm a new mustacian, but in this industry, you either save your money when the gettins good, or your toast when it eventually tanks.

This same guy was talking to me again (tough to avoid him), and he's telling me how much money he was making up in Boston last year.  We both live in the greater Charleston sc area.  He's burnt every bridge here so he had to seek work out of state. 

Anyway, he's telling me that "guys up there make over 50.00 an hour." (I'm thinking, "no, that's what they're paid hourly as subcontractors, they're not really making 50.00.  I personally charge more per hour, and indont have to travel to Boston, nor do I have to pay to stay in a hotel while I'm up there like he did). And he goes on to say that most of the guys up there have second homes, and when it's payday, most of them just tell their boss to mail them their check.  He could not wrap his head around this!  He kept saying it over and over, and telling me he would rush to pick up his check. 

Sounds like a few mustacian carpenters live up in Boston :)

[Draggon]

I promise I'm not being judgy; I'm just trying to understand. When you were in the middle of the gymnastic and dancing, what was the end goal? What was the hoped for result that would make the expense and effort worthwhile?

I can tell you I asked myself this question many times over the years as I saw expenses piling up.  In contrast, my son was a bargain.  There is no right answer.  We could certainly afford it, but I made it clear that I wasn't on board with going whole-hog either.  We compromised, and my wife did as much as she could to save money along the way - things like making costumes or buying basic costumes and dressing them up herself with all the necessary bling.

The rewards were many.  It kept her very busy resulting in a trouble-free life for the most part.  It kept her focused and taught her the meaning of hard work vs. reward.  She had little interest in dating and partying until recently.  My wife ate it up and got very involved in the dance studio while making a bunch of new friends.  She was the go-to person when someone needing something done with a sewing machine.  I think she's still dealing with the post-partum blues.

Anyway, we had no specific end goal.  There was certainly no illusion that she would go Pro and make bazillions of dollars or anything like that.  I say that, but one of our dance family friends just had their daughter take 2nd place on the national TV show, So You Think You Can Dance.  For Valerie, this was a dream come true.  I can't quite relate, but I guess dancing really gets into your blood and becomes a big part of who you are and how you express yourself.

The biggest caution I would put on all this is to know your own means and don't get carried away.  While expensive, we both worked and made sure we kept it relatively reasonable.

[viper155]

I am resigning my position in the Army, and there is literally an Act of Congress mandating that everyone leaving the service go through a battery of classes such as resume writing workshops, briefs on your Department of Veterans Affairs benefits, and how to conduct a professional interview. There is also a mandatory five hour personal finance class. From the material covered and the side conversations in the class it is clear that this is something that should be mandatory to all people upon entrance into the service.

You shouldn't be able to get a high school diploma until you've done this!

[EricL]

I am resigning my position in the Army, and there is literally an Act of Congress mandating that everyone leaving the service go through a battery of classes such as resume writing workshops, briefs on your Department of Veterans Affairs benefits, and how to conduct a professional interview. There is also a mandatory five hour personal finance class. From the material covered and the side conversations in the class it is clear that this is something that should be mandatory to all people upon entrance into the service.

You shouldn't be able to get a high school diploma until you've done this!

LoL.  My high schools (I attended 4) didn't teach ANY of that.  And certainly not veteran's benefits.  The closest thing they ever did was teach me how to write checks.

[Lindy]

My first post!  My coworker was telling me how she was shopping for new makeup at Ulta and when the cashier was done totaling up her purchases it was around $800.  She was a little shocked at the price, but paid it anyways.  She told herself it was good makeup and she would use it all.  When she saw my shocked face she explained that it wasn't just makeup, but really good makeup brushes also.

I love makeup/skincare/haircare, and I love Ulta/Sephora, and even I would have said, deadpan, "you are kidding, right?"  $800 is ludicrous for an annual budget.  For a one-time visit, it is truly, spectacularly, insane.  Wow.

This CW isn't even what I would consider very feminine.  She never wears makeup to work.  I just don't get it.

[Lindy]

My first post!  My coworker was telling me how she was shopping for new makeup at Ulta and when the cashier was done totaling up her purchases it was around $800.  She was a little shocked at the price, but paid it anyways.  She told herself it was good makeup and she would use it all.  When she saw my shocked face she explained that it wasn't just makeup, but really good makeup brushes also.

Welcome to the boards!  As a guy I refrain from commenting on this topic but once a co-worker came in gushing about her weekend at a spa, the manicure, pedicure, whole works and then said how her facial was $xxx number of dollars but so worth it.  Another, older lady who is very refined looking in a classic, non glitzy way stopped, looked at her intently and said " you spent $xxx on a facial?  Honey, you need to ask for a refund" and walked away.  I had to leave before I busted a gut!

Haha. That's awesome.

[eyePod]

Got a great service at work on our intranet today. They're going to be offering a seminar on "Early Strategies for Getting More Money" geared towards parents preparing for college. Their focus group: Parents of 9-12th graders. "want to get a head start on finding additional money to pay for college."

Um, probably should have started planning a little earlier than 3 years out for something that could cost >20k per year...

[johnny847]

Got a great service at work on our intranet today. They're going to be offering a seminar on "Early Strategies for Getting More Money" geared towards parents preparing for college. Their focus group: Parents of 9-12th graders. "want to get a head start on finding additional money to pay for college."

Um, probably should have started planning a little earlier than 3 years out for something that could cost >20k per year...

Well considering how many Americans live paycheck to paycheck, they'd probably argue that saving for an expense before it is incurred is a "head start." *sigh*

[Chranstronaut]

The newly remarried mom was complaining that "these banks just expect you to have money lying around for a down payment!"  They spoke some more and I tuned out, then heard the single mom say "No one in this day and age should hold it against someone for having credit card debt; we all do!"

I love it when someone talks about "who has money lying around." As if people with savings just have piles of cash on the floor, where we stumble over them and exclaim, "Oh! I could make a down payment with this!" It makes me want to drape some dollar bills on the couch, on the bed, in the recliner, on a cushion, etc., so I can have money actually lying around (instead of working its butt off earning interest and dividends).

That is hilarious. I actually /do/ have small amounts of cash stashed around my house in places where I'll forget about it. I'll come across it randomly and be like "oh yeah, I left some money here encase I need it. Well, I don't need it now, I guess I'll just leave it there". Its a pretty awesome feeling tbh.

When I was a kid, I used to stash money around the house in case I unexpectedly traveled through time.  I figured that if I ended up in the recent past or future, I would still have access to my secret stashes.  I was also REALLY concerned when they started printing Sacagawea dollars because I didn't know if I'd have money that would be accepted in the past anymore.  I was old enough at that age to be PRETTY SURE time travel wasn't possible, but I've always been cautious about money.

[johnny847]

The newly remarried mom was complaining that "these banks just expect you to have money lying around for a down payment!"  They spoke some more and I tuned out, then heard the single mom say "No one in this day and age should hold it against someone for having credit card debt; we all do!"

I love it when someone talks about "who has money lying around." As if people with savings just have piles of cash on the floor, where we stumble over them and exclaim, "Oh! I could make a down payment with this!" It makes me want to drape some dollar bills on the couch, on the bed, in the recliner, on a cushion, etc., so I can have money actually lying around (instead of working its butt off earning interest and dividends).

That is hilarious. I actually /do/ have small amounts of cash stashed around my house in places where I'll forget about it. I'll come across it randomly and be like "oh yeah, I left some money here encase I need it. Well, I don't need it now, I guess I'll just leave it there". Its a pretty awesome feeling tbh.

When I was a kid, I used to stash money around the house in case I unexpectedly traveled through time.  I figured that if I ended up in the recent past or future, I would still have access to my secret stashes.  I was also REALLY concerned when they started printing Sacagawea dollars because I didn't know if I'd have money that would be accepted in the past anymore.  I was old enough at that age to be PRETTY SURE time travel wasn't possible, but I've always been cautious about money.

Hahaha I got a kick out of this one. Funny how children's minds work---one of my friends as a kid thought the condensation that forms on the outside of cups of cold drinks was because it was too hard for the cup to hold the water in.

[Helvegen]

I have a co-worker complaining to me about how far in debt he is, no job stability, how that reality causes him so much stress, etc. Where is the co-worker today? On a beach in USVI. Because he deserves it, ya know. I wish I was joking.

[AllChoptUp]

I promise I'm not being judgy; I'm just trying to understand. When you were in the middle of the gymnastic and dancing, what was the end goal? What was the hoped for result that would make the expense and effort worthwhile?

I can tell you I asked myself this question many times over the years as I saw expenses piling up.  In contrast, my son was a bargain.  There is no right answer.  We could certainly afford it, but I made it clear that I wasn't on board with going whole-hog either.  We compromised, and my wife did as much as she could to save money along the way - things like making costumes or buying basic costumes and dressing them up herself with all the necessary bling.

The rewards were many.  It kept her very busy resulting in a trouble-free life for the most part.  It kept her focused and taught her the meaning of hard work vs. reward.  She had little interest in dating and partying until recently.  My wife ate it up and got very involved in the dance studio while making a bunch of new friends.  She was the go-to person when someone needing something done with a sewing machine.  I think she's still dealing with the post-partum blues.

Anyway, we had no specific end goal.  There was certainly no illusion that she would go Pro and make bazillions of dollars or anything like that.  I say that, but one of our dance family friends just had their daughter take 2nd place on the national TV show, So You Think You Can Dance.  For Valerie, this was a dream come true.  I can't quite relate, but I guess dancing really gets into your blood and becomes a big part of who you are and how you express yourself.

The biggest caution I would put on all this is to know your own means and don't get carried away.  While expensive, we both worked and made sure we kept it relatively reasonable.

Not judging here - others' spending does not affect my family.  And I have a three year old so things may change, I guess. 

I can't see paying hundreds of dollars a month on a child's hobby.  I have to think there are other activities that provide focus and the promise of reward for hard work.  May be wrong, time will tell.  I would like to see discussion on this topic though!

[Ashyukun]

Not judging here - others' spending does not affect my family.  And I have a three year old so things may change, I guess. 

I can't see paying hundreds of dollars a month on a child's hobby.  I have to think there are other activities that provide focus and the promise of reward for hard work.  May be wrong, time will tell.  I would like to see discussion on this topic though!

I'd imagine it's very specific to each family and each child. My wife for example- like many girls she got started young in dance, but unlike many both excelled at it and truly enjoyed it and determined that it was what she wanted to do with her life. She continued instruction in it, probably not cheaply given what she herself now gets paid to teach it, through High School- and tried out for several dance companies resulting in her having a job as a professional ballet dancer waiting for her when she graduated from High School. She has long retired from being a professional dancer herself, but still teaches it and has started her own non-profit dance company. Many kids never get to go on and live their childhood dream jobs, but I fully support giving them the chance to find something they love and put their all into it.

[KBlynx]

Not judging here - others' spending does not affect my family.  And I have a three year old so things may change, I guess. 

I can't see paying hundreds of dollars a month on a child's hobby.  I have to think there are other activities that provide focus and the promise of reward for hard work.  May be wrong, time will tell.  I would like to see discussion on this topic though!

I'd imagine it's very specific to each family and each child. My wife for example- like many girls she got started young in dance, but unlike many both excelled at it and truly enjoyed it and determined that it was what she wanted to do with her life. She continued instruction in it, probably not cheaply given what she herself now gets paid to teach it, through High School- and tried out for several dance companies resulting in her having a job as a professional ballet dancer waiting for her when she graduated from High School. She has long retired from being a professional dancer herself, but still teaches it and has started her own non-profit dance company. Many kids never get to go on and live their childhood dream jobs, but I fully support giving them the chance to find something they love and put their all into it.

Here here. I for one needed a physical outlet in my early years. I was a very stressed out teenager and without my trail horse I think I may have just curled up and died. It was the best way for me to blow off my social anxieties and self-confidence issues in a productive way.  I don't have the land or extra resources for a large animal for my daughter but I think that a few dance classes a week may help her the same way that my outlet did for me. Or so I hope!

[CheapskateWife]

Conversation at a garage sale involved a fellow who had a computer, tv, and the latest/greatest gaming console in each bedroom, his own bedroom and the living room because he didn't like to share and couldn't make his kids share either.

As a bonus, my 15 yr old overheard this conversation and pulled me aside later to say "Mom, that guy is insane"

He is going to be all right.

[vivophoenix]

Not judging here - others' spending does not affect my family.  And I have a three year old so things may change, I guess. 

I can't see paying hundreds of dollars a month on a child's hobby.  I have to think there are other activities that provide focus and the promise of reward for hard work.  May be wrong, time will tell.  I would like to see discussion on this topic though!

I'd imagine it's very specific to each family and each child. My wife for example- like many girls she got started young in dance, but unlike many both excelled at it and truly enjoyed it and determined that it was what she wanted to do with her life. She continued instruction in it, probably not cheaply given what she herself now gets paid to teach it, through High School- and tried out for several dance companies resulting in her having a job as a professional ballet dancer waiting for her when she graduated from High School. She has long retired from being a professional dancer herself, but still teaches it and has started her own non-profit dance company. Many kids never get to go on and live their childhood dream jobs, but I fully support giving them the chance to find something they love and put their all into it.

My husband was a musical prodigy and my in-laws spent a fortune on it, simply because serious training in the arts tends to be very expensive (at least pianists don't wear out instruments the way ballerinas do their shoes). It won him a scholarship to America (where he met and married a nice US citizen who gave him a green card) and it's now his career. For most kids, that kind of training isn't worth the money or effort. For a small handful it may be, but you're going to know by the time they're eight or so. My MIL was told when my husband was five that he was the best musical talent anyone in the country had seen in decades. If you have a kid that talented, you're going to know early on and can make decisions from there.

sounds like youre treating the kid as an investment vehicle, which you  are welcome to do.

but seems a little cold. if i could afford it. and it wasnt too crazy. id pay for private music/dance/hobbies lessons for my kid. because it is enjoyable and yes there are plenty of free activities, but that does not make them equally enjoyable.

doing something just cause its free isnt the same as doing something you enjoy and   pay for.

[J'onn J'onzz]

Not judging here - others' spending does not affect my family.  And I have a three year old so things may change, I guess. 

I can't see paying hundreds of dollars a month on a child's hobby.  I have to think there are other activities that provide focus and the promise of reward for hard work.  May be wrong, time will tell.  I would like to see discussion on this topic though!

I'd imagine it's very specific to each family and each child. My wife for example- like many girls she got started young in dance, but unlike many both excelled at it and truly enjoyed it and determined that it was what she wanted to do with her life. She continued instruction in it, probably not cheaply given what she herself now gets paid to teach it, through High School- and tried out for several dance companies resulting in her having a job as a professional ballet dancer waiting for her when she graduated from High School. She has long retired from being a professional dancer herself, but still teaches it and has started her own non-profit dance company. Many kids never get to go on and live their childhood dream jobs, but I fully support giving them the chance to find something they love and put their all into it.

My husband was a musical prodigy and my in-laws spent a fortune on it, simply because serious training in the arts tends to be very expensive (at least pianists don't wear out instruments the way ballerinas do their shoes). It won him a scholarship to America (where he met and married a nice US citizen who gave him a green card) and it's now his career. For most kids, that kind of training isn't worth the money or effort. For a small handful it may be, but you're going to know by the time they're eight or so. My MIL was told when my husband was five that he was the best musical talent anyone in the country had seen in decades. If you have a kid that talented, you're going to know early on and can make decisions from there.

Just because a kid is not a prodigy or is involved with an activity that will most likely not become a career for them does not mean it is not worth it. My 12 year old has been in martial arts since he was 6, started with Taekwondo, then MMA, and now he is at a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu after our recent move. I don't expect him to grow up and be a professional fighter and that doesn't really interest him either but there are plenty of other benefits that don't involve making a career out of it, confidence, fitness, work ethic, competitiveness, friendships just to name a few. Well worth the money spent on it IMO.

[J'onn J'onzz]

Not judging here - others' spending does not affect my family.  And I have a three year old so things may change, I guess. 

I can't see paying hundreds of dollars a month on a child's hobby.  I have to think there are other activities that provide focus and the promise of reward for hard work.  May be wrong, time will tell.  I would like to see discussion on this topic though!

I'd imagine it's very specific to each family and each child. My wife for example- like many girls she got started young in dance, but unlike many both excelled at it and truly enjoyed it and determined that it was what she wanted to do with her life. She continued instruction in it, probably not cheaply given what she herself now gets paid to teach it, through High School- and tried out for several dance companies resulting in her having a job as a professional ballet dancer waiting for her when she graduated from High School. She has long retired from being a professional dancer herself, but still teaches it and has started her own non-profit dance company. Many kids never get to go on and live their childhood dream jobs, but I fully support giving them the chance to find something they love and put their all into it.

My husband was a musical prodigy and my in-laws spent a fortune on it, simply because serious training in the arts tends to be very expensive (at least pianists don't wear out instruments the way ballerinas do their shoes). It won him a scholarship to America (where he met and married a nice US citizen who gave him a green card) and it's now his career. For most kids, that kind of training isn't worth the money or effort. For a small handful it may be, but you're going to know by the time they're eight or so. My MIL was told when my husband was five that he was the best musical talent anyone in the country had seen in decades. If you have a kid that talented, you're going to know early on and can make decisions from there.

Just because a kid is not a prodigy or is involved with an activity that will most likely not become a career for them does not mean it is not worth it. My 12 year old has been in martial arts since he was 6, started with Taekwondo, then MMA, and now he is at a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu after our recent move. I don't expect him to grow up and be a professional fighter and that doesn't really interest him either but there are plenty of other benefits that don't involve making a career out of it, confidence, fitness, work ethic, competitiveness, friendships just to name a few. Well worth the money spent on it IMO.

Oh, absolutely. My stance isn't that I won't pay for extracurriculars for kids that aren't professional caliber at the activity in question. But I'm not willing to spend the same kind of money on my child's piano hobby as I am on their piano training, if that distinction makes sense. I have a number of hobbies, and I spend reasonable amounts of money on them quite happily. But there's a limit to the caliber of tools, materials and facilities I'll buy, a limit that would be higher if this was something I'd do for a living.

That does make sense. Guess I misinterpreted the first post.

[Primm]

When I was a kid, I used to stash money around the house in case I unexpectedly traveled through time.  I figured that if I ended up in the recent past or future, I would still have access to my secret stashes.  I was also REALLY concerned when they started printing Sacagawea dollars because I didn't know if I'd have money that would be accepted in the past anymore.  I was old enough at that age to be PRETTY SURE time travel wasn't possible, but I've always been cautious about money.

Reminds me of this...

Bill and Ted.

[BlueHouse]

DC has much higher property tax than Virginia (or at least Fairfax County).  A similar priced home in hundreds of dollars more a month in DC just because of the escrow. 

This is incorrect.  DC Property Tax Rate = 0.85 / $100;   FFX Country Property Tax rate = 1.090 / $100. 

[eyePod]

DC has much higher property tax than Virginia (or at least Fairfax County).  A similar priced home in hundreds of dollars more a month in DC just because of the escrow. 

This is incorrect.  DC Property Tax Rate = 0.85 / $100;   FFX Country Property Tax rate = 1.090 / $100.

Would the insurance be more in DC?

[theadvicist]

Friend: "We're thinking of making the garage two-storey"
Me: "Oh, why?"
Friend: "For, you know extra space, storage"
Me: "Why do you need extra space, you've got a five bedroom house..."
Friend: "But it's full of stuff! We need somewhere to put it all"
Me: "What stuff?"
Friend: "Mostly gifts and stuff we didn't even want in the first place!"
Me: "The solution to having too much stuff you don't even want is not to build somewhere to house all the stuff. The solution is to get rid of the stuff you don't even want"
Friend: Look of utter amazement. I actually think she -understood-

[johnny847]

Friend: "We're thinking of making the garage two-storey"
Me: "Oh, why?"
Friend: "For, you know extra space, storage"
Me: "Why do you need extra space, you've got a five bedroom house..."
Friend: "But it's full of stuff! We need somewhere to put it all"
Me: "What stuff?"
Friend: "Mostly gifts and stuff we didn't even want in the first place!"
Me: "The solution to having too much stuff you don't even want is not to build somewhere to house all the stuff. The solution is to get rid of the stuff you don't even want"
Friend: Look of utter amazement. I actually think she -understood-

/face palm
It boggles my mind that the first solution some people have to having too much unwanted stuff is to build more space for said unwanted stuff.

[Siobhan]

I've got two in the past week.

1.  Can anyone lend me $600 for Yo Gabba Gabba tickets?  Child X really LOVES them but we can't afford to go.  Me "Holy CRAP a kids show is that expensive?!?!"  Her "Well, that's the first 15 rows and you get a back stage VIP pass, only the best for child X (who is all of maybe 3 and won't remember anything about this meeting"  Mind you I am pretty sure they are still paying off around 60k in credit card debt that she wracked up before getting married.

2.  Co Worker who gets in large boxes from fancy stores all the time and routinely spends hundreds a week on clothes.   "Ugh, our home health aid wants a raise, I TOLD her 4 years ago when we hired her there would be no raises because we can't afford it".  Me: "Well how much are you paying her"  Her "800 a month for both of my parents who are on dialysis and live in NYC"  Her and her husband pull in over 200k (probably closer to 250) a year combined, this aid takes care of her parents 24-7 365 because she doesn't want to have to deal with them and when I asked she swore poverty that she couldn't afford an extra 50 a month to pay this woman (under the table mind you)...aaaand she just spent 3k, on a couch that she was flashing pictures in the office of...  We continued to talk and I brought up early retirement and got the "I don't know how you can save on our crappy salaries, we can only save 300 a month"....she earns about 20-30k more a year than me, and I'm pushing 90 a year.

[tmac]

Friend: "We're thinking of making the garage two-storey"
Me: "Oh, why?"
Friend: "For, you know extra space, storage"
Me: "Why do you need extra space, you've got a five bedroom house..."
Friend: "But it's full of stuff! We need somewhere to put it all"
Me: "What stuff?"
Friend: "Mostly gifts and stuff we didn't even want in the first place!"
Me: "The solution to having too much stuff you don't even want is not to build somewhere to house all the stuff. The solution is to get rid of the stuff you don't even want"
Friend: Look of utter amazement. I actually think she -understood-

/face palm
It boggles my mind that the first solution some people have to having too much unwanted stuff is to build more space for said unwanted stuff.

My best friend had to short-sell her too-spendy-too-big house when she got transferred. They then rented a somewhat-spendier-even-bigger house at the new location, which they HAD TO HAVE so they'd have room for all their stuff. It took 2 semi-trucks and $10k to move them. But then they had extra empty bedrooms, which of course needed to be furnished "for guests", so out they went to buy more stuff. Makes me sick to think about it.

We moved a week before she did, and she was blown away that we were downsizing by 300 sq. ft., and that we had "just" 4 BR house with 5 people. We used a medium-sized UHaul, which cost $1500, including gas.

[Siobhan]

I can see this point.  When we bought our house in Fairfax County I was working from home 100%, so we purchased something close to Belvoir, where my husband works, it's a reverse commute when he is home.  Fast forward a year and my company moves it's HQ from Florida to Sterling VA...I now have the commute from hell every morning.  Thankfully as a "please don't quit" they let me work from home one to two days a week still.  Now, we can't move closer to my job because that would put his commute in the bad zone, and I'd rather only have one of us driving the ridiculousness.

I live in NoVA, but up until last Friday I worked in DC. I'm starting my new job Wednesday, which will be 13 miles from my house, a fairly reasonable biking distance. I'm eating my last ever lunch at this company, sitting around with coworkers chatting. I mention I'm looking forward to this new job since I'll be able to bike to work, and immediately everyone starts ranting about how much they hate cyclists. Then one woman says "I can't bike to work, I live too far away." I ask where she lives, and she says "Woodbridge." She apparently drives every day from Woodbridge, VA to DC, about 30 miles, then pays for parking in a $14/day lot. Someone asks her "but you live there because your husband works around there, right?" and she says "no, he works at the Navy Yard." The Navy Yard is also in DC, and they both commute separately 30 miles each way every day. She said it takes her an hour on a good day. I asked why doesn't she just move closer, and she said "we can't afford housing any closer, and besides, my husband already had the house, so it's just easier." I badly wanted to deliver a facepunch but lucky for her she was on the other side of the table and I couldn't reach.

I mean I can understand the inertia aspect - it's hard to uplift your family, particularly if they have kids, to move closer to work. when you already own your home. But the financial cost each of them commuting 60 miles round trip is nuts! If we believe the IRS reimbursal rate of .56 cents per mile reflects the average cost per mile of the average car on the road, then they're paying $16800 a year for their commute, and she's paying $3500 a year for parking. That's $20,300 a year!!! After tax!!
**head explodes**"

[Chranstronaut]

When I was a kid, I used to stash money around the house in case I unexpectedly traveled through time.  I figured that if I ended up in the recent past or future, I would still have access to my secret stashes.  I was also REALLY concerned when they started printing Sacagawea dollars because I didn't know if I'd have money that would be accepted in the past anymore.  I was old enough at that age to be PRETTY SURE time travel wasn't possible, but I've always been cautious about money.

Reminds me of this...

Bill and Ted.

To keep derailing the thread in the interest of science, this is exactly how I thought it could work.  I blame Bill and Ted and the Time Traveler's Quartet book series, but I was also really into wilderness survival books like My Side of the Mountain.  I was like a mini doomsday prepper who still thought magic could be real.

I had it all figured out.  The key to remember, obviously, is that you must keep hiding more money at different time intervals to keep a certain flow going for your future/past self.  This went on for a year or two.  I don't think I ever told my parents why I did it, but my mom would find the money around the house when cleaning and try to give it back to me.  She stopped asking for explanations eventually.

I think I just figured out the real reason I am a natural saver...

[RetiredAt63]

If you ever have the chance, go to see 2 Pianos 4 Hands.  Great musical play, follows 2 boys to young manhood as piano takes over their lives

Not judging here - others' spending does not affect my family.  And I have a three year old so things may change, I guess. 

I can't see paying hundreds of dollars a month on a child's hobby.  I have to think there are other activities that provide focus and the promise of reward for hard work.  May be wrong, time will tell.  I would like to see discussion on this topic though!

I'd imagine it's very specific to each family and each child. My wife for example- like many girls she got started young in dance, but unlike many both excelled at it and truly enjoyed it and determined that it was what she wanted to do with her life. She continued instruction in it, probably not cheaply given what she herself now gets paid to teach it, through High School- and tried out for several dance companies resulting in her having a job as a professional ballet dancer waiting for her when she graduated from High School. She has long retired from being a professional dancer herself, but still teaches it and has started her own non-profit dance company. Many kids never get to go on and live their childhood dream jobs, but I fully support giving them the chance to find something they love and put their all into it.

My husband was a musical prodigy and my in-laws spent a fortune on it, simply because serious training in the arts tends to be very expensive (at least pianists don't wear out instruments the way ballerinas do their shoes). It won him a scholarship to America (where he met and married a nice US citizen who gave him a green card) and it's now his career. For most kids, that kind of training isn't worth the money or effort. For a small handful it may be, but you're going to know by the time they're eight or so. My MIL was told when my husband was five that he was the best musical talent anyone in the country had seen in decades. If you have a kid that talented, you're going to know early on and can make decisions from there.

sounds like youre treating the kid as an investment vehicle, which you  are welcome to do.

but seems a little cold. if i could afford it. and it wasnt too crazy. id pay for private music/dance/hobbies lessons for my kid. because it is enjoyable and yes there are plenty of free activities, but that does not make them equally enjoyable.

doing something just cause its free isnt the same as doing something you enjoy and   pay for.

I didn't treat the child as anything. It was my in-laws. My current parenting philosophy is just to not resent the tiny fetus that's making me sick all the time.

My husband loves his chosen instrument, and turned his back on a far higher earning skill to pursue it full time as a career. But PERSONALLY I wouldn't pay for serious athletic/musical/dance/arts training for a child that lacked professional potential. A local soccer league with practice twice a week or the high school team? Sure. Paying to send my kids to top training clinics and sending them to see sports psychologists? Not unless we're looking at national team material. Piano lessons once every week or two with the lady up the street because they think it's fun? Sure. $12,000 for Julliard's pre-college program, or fees to enter piano competitions in other countries? Not unless we're talking about serious professional potential. There are very different levels of "paying for an extracurricular" here. Pre-professional training in these fields is wildly expensive (on a par with college) and not something I would fund for someone who doesn't have the potential to do this for a living.