Overheard at Work

[Pooperman]

Bit of backstory for this one. Coworker is a single parent with one kid. Makes a decent salary ($75k give or take). She's about 40 years old, has boyfriend, whatever. So when I joined the company, she was house sitting for another coworker about 1:40 mins from work by car. She complains about the drive, about not having much money, so I gave her some advice about how to cut back and stuff (it was ignored). So last week she talked about getting a new car because her current car is ending its lease. Some people said buy a new one instead of leasing (marginally better). I suggest buying one that's just off lease. She gives reasons why that's not a good idea (reliability, etc). It came down to being underwater on the lease (is that possible?). I suggest she get something similar to what she had (Accord) but she wants a CRV because it's better in the snow. I say that snow tires are what make a car good/bad and relay the story of me driving my 2 wheel drive car in 6 inches of snow up and down hills in upstate NY without troubles (no snow tires).

Well she was late to work yesterday because she was picking up her CRV from the dealership... a lease. I have no idea how much that monthly payment will be, but it's not good. She's got a bunch of debt too. She hates her job and is going to try to get a higher paying one. I make about what she does and yet manage to save like $30k/yr... So sad.

[notquitefrugal]

It came down to being underwater on the lease (is that possible?).

In the olden days, there were "open-ended" leases, which weren't really leases at all, more like an option to buy or trade in at market value at the end of the term. I don't think they exist anymore. More likely, she was way over the allotted miles on the lease and owed several hundred up to a few thousand dollars in excess mileage fees. Less likely, there was excess wear and tear on the car she was turning in (if it was a Honda, they have a pretty generous wear and tear policy, so this is even less likely).

It's not an absolute necessity, but I will say it is more difficult to get stuck in snow with 4WD/AWD.

[notquitefrugal]

Since we're talking about jeans, where all do the men on here buy theirs? I hate shopping and will just rely on gifts for the most part for my jeans, but I will need to get a new pair soon and am dreading going to the mall. How much do you normally spend on a good pair of jeans? I tend to wear one or two pairs and alternate between them as I sit in an office and don't really do much physical exertion while at work.

Same place I buy my khakis--the Polo Ralph Lauren outlet. Probably $50-60 per pair (go ahead and facepunch me). I have two pair of their jeans (they fit me really well) and some other jeans which don't fit so well. I get the non-weathered ones, on the theory that they will eventually weather as I wash them. Happy with the quality so far.

[LennStar]

"I bought me a brand new Challenger Hellcat. Cost me $72,000."

He makes $80,000 per year.

So he bouhgt it for the car company and the bank's profit?

[runningthroughFIRE]

Since we're talking about jeans, where all do the men on here buy theirs? I hate shopping and will just rely on gifts for the most part for my jeans, but I will need to get a new pair soon and am dreading going to the mall. How much do you normally spend on a good pair of jeans? I tend to wear one or two pairs and alternate between them as I sit in an office and don't really do much physical exertion while at work.

Same place I buy my khakis--the Polo Ralph Lauren outlet. Probably $50-60 per pair (go ahead and facepunch me). I have two pair of their jeans (they fit me really well) and some other jeans which don't fit so well. I get the non-weathered ones, on the theory that they will eventually weather as I wash them. Happy with the quality so far.

I destroy jeans before i wear them out. Motor oil, paint, knife cuts, etc. So I buy the cheapest I can find. Last time I got jeans it was $7.00 per pair at WalMart. But I buy them for work clothes and rarely leave the house in them.

Emphasis mine.  I feel as though there's a story here...

[PencilThinStash]

Since we're talking about jeans, where all do the men on here buy theirs? I hate shopping and will just rely on gifts for the most part for my jeans, but I will need to get a new pair soon and am dreading going to the mall. How much do you normally spend on a good pair of jeans? I tend to wear one or two pairs and alternate between them as I sit in an office and don't really do much physical exertion while at work.

Same place I buy my khakis--the Polo Ralph Lauren outlet. Probably $50-60 per pair (go ahead and facepunch me). I have two pair of their jeans (they fit me really well) and some other jeans which don't fit so well. I get the non-weathered ones, on the theory that they will eventually weather as I wash them. Happy with the quality so far.

I destroy jeans before i wear them out. Motor oil, paint, knife cuts, etc. So I buy the cheapest I can find. Last time I got jeans it was $7.00 per pair at WalMart. But I buy them for work clothes and rarely leave the house in them.

Emphasis mine.  I feel as though there's a story here...

What, you mean you DON'T participate in the underground knife fighting rings? I thought it was a pretty common thing among mustachians.

[GuitarStv]

Since we're talking about jeans, where all do the men on here buy theirs? I hate shopping and will just rely on gifts for the most part for my jeans, but I will need to get a new pair soon and am dreading going to the mall. How much do you normally spend on a good pair of jeans? I tend to wear one or two pairs and alternate between them as I sit in an office and don't really do much physical exertion while at work.

Same place I buy my khakis--the Polo Ralph Lauren outlet. Probably $50-60 per pair (go ahead and facepunch me). I have two pair of their jeans (they fit me really well) and some other jeans which don't fit so well. I get the non-weathered ones, on the theory that they will eventually weather as I wash them. Happy with the quality so far.

I destroy jeans before i wear them out. Motor oil, paint, knife cuts, etc. So I buy the cheapest I can find. Last time I got jeans it was $7.00 per pair at WalMart. But I buy them for work clothes and rarely leave the house in them.

Emphasis mine.  I feel as though there's a story here...

What, you mean you DON'T participate in the underground knife fighting rings? I thought it was a pretty common thing among mustachians.

The first rule of knife club is . . .


STABBITY STABBITY STABBITY

[MgoSam]

Since we're talking about jeans, where all do the men on here buy theirs? I hate shopping and will just rely on gifts for the most part for my jeans, but I will need to get a new pair soon and am dreading going to the mall. How much do you normally spend on a good pair of jeans? I tend to wear one or two pairs and alternate between them as I sit in an office and don't really do much physical exertion while at work.

Same place I buy my khakis--the Polo Ralph Lauren outlet. Probably $50-60 per pair (go ahead and facepunch me). I have two pair of their jeans (they fit me really well) and some other jeans which don't fit so well. I get the non-weathered ones, on the theory that they will eventually weather as I wash them. Happy with the quality so far.

I destroy jeans before i wear them out. Motor oil, paint, knife cuts, etc. So I buy the cheapest I can find. Last time I got jeans it was $7.00 per pair at WalMart. But I buy them for work clothes and rarely leave the house in them.

Emphasis mine.  I feel as though there's a story here...

What, you mean you DON'T participate in the underground knife fighting rings? I thought it was a pretty common thing among mustachians.

The first rule of knife club is . . .


STABBITY STABBITY STABBITY

I see some people here haven't played Knifey Spooney before.

[GuitarStv]

Since we're talking about jeans, where all do the men on here buy theirs? I hate shopping and will just rely on gifts for the most part for my jeans, but I will need to get a new pair soon and am dreading going to the mall. How much do you normally spend on a good pair of jeans? I tend to wear one or two pairs and alternate between them as I sit in an office and don't really do much physical exertion while at work.

Same place I buy my khakis--the Polo Ralph Lauren outlet. Probably $50-60 per pair (go ahead and facepunch me). I have two pair of their jeans (they fit me really well) and some other jeans which don't fit so well. I get the non-weathered ones, on the theory that they will eventually weather as I wash them. Happy with the quality so far.

I destroy jeans before i wear them out. Motor oil, paint, knife cuts, etc. So I buy the cheapest I can find. Last time I got jeans it was $7.00 per pair at WalMart. But I buy them for work clothes and rarely leave the house in them.

Emphasis mine.  I feel as though there's a story here...

What, you mean you DON'T participate in the underground knife fighting rings? I thought it was a pretty common thing among mustachians.

The first rule of knife club is . . .


STABBITY STABBITY STABBITY

I see some people here haven't played Knifey Spooney before.

Always play to win.

[zolotiyeruki]

I rarely wear jeans any more, although my work is very casual.  I'm giving Duluth Trading Company Firehose Work pants (say that 5 times fast) a try.  They're made out of heavy duty canvas and are surprising comfortable.  They're pricey ($65/pair) but supposed to be super durable.  I got a pair last Christmas, and got a second pair this summer at their outlet store for $30.  Time will tell, but so far they live up to their claims of ruggedness.

Heh, it looks like they *do* have regular style jeans in the heavy duty material, too.

[PencilThinStash]

Since we're talking about jeans, where all do the men on here buy theirs? I hate shopping and will just rely on gifts for the most part for my jeans, but I will need to get a new pair soon and am dreading going to the mall. How much do you normally spend on a good pair of jeans? I tend to wear one or two pairs and alternate between them as I sit in an office and don't really do much physical exertion while at work.

Same place I buy my khakis--the Polo Ralph Lauren outlet. Probably $50-60 per pair (go ahead and facepunch me). I have two pair of their jeans (they fit me really well) and some other jeans which don't fit so well. I get the non-weathered ones, on the theory that they will eventually weather as I wash them. Happy with the quality so far.

I destroy jeans before i wear them out. Motor oil, paint, knife cuts, etc. So I buy the cheapest I can find. Last time I got jeans it was $7.00 per pair at WalMart. But I buy them for work clothes and rarely leave the house in them.

Emphasis mine.  I feel as though there's a story here...

What, you mean you DON'T participate in the underground knife fighting rings? I thought it was a pretty common thing among mustachians.

The first rule of knife club is . . .


STABBITY STABBITY STABBITY

I have no idea how this transported itself into this thread - weird things happening on the interwebs.

Also I have a really bad track record with Olfa/Utility blade knives. Wish it was more exciting than that.

Solid cover up. Way to follow the rules of Knife Club. *fist bump*

...shit, did I just break the rules?

[HairyUpperLip]

I recently grabbed a $20 pair from Old Navy - boot cut style. I'm happy with them. Have been wearing them for a few months now.

Old Navy's quality, in my experience, just is not up to snuff. Or it is at least wildly varying.

I keep my expectations low for $20. So far so good.

But I wear sweats and basketball shorts more often than my jeans.

[CabinetGuy]

I rarely wear jeans any more, although my work is very casual.  I'm giving Duluth Trading Company Firehose Work pants (say that 5 times fast) a try.  They're made out of heavy duty canvas and are surprising comfortable.  They're pricey ($65/pair) but supposed to be super durable.  I got a pair last Christmas, and got a second pair this summer at their outlet store for $30.  Time will tell, but so far they live up to their claims of ruggedness.

Heh, it looks like they *do* have regular style jeans in the heavy duty material, too.

Yesssss! Best part of the Duluth pants:  return them anytime for any reason and they will REPLACE THEM.  Costs 6.00 to ship them back, but damn.  I wear my fire hose pants hard on site and they still last me two years.  Then I just send them back.

[RecoveringCarClown]

"I bought me a brand new Challenger Hellcat. Cost me $72,000."

He makes $80,000 per year.

So he lived on $8k last year and paid cash? Good for him. ;)

Seriously though, make sure you get a ride before it gets repo'd. :(

[gimp]

75% annual salary on a house is awesome. Congratulations. I wish I could do that - it'd be done in a heartbeat.

90% salary on a car is... uh, steep. I hope for his sake he loves that beast of a machine and keeps it for 20+ years. (Even 20 years from now, it will still be an absolute beast of a machine. I want one about 20 years from now, probably in the $20k range.)

[mtn]

"I bought me a brand new Challenger Hellcat. Cost me $72,000."

He makes $80,000 per year.

So he lived on $8k last year and paid cash? Good for him. ;)

Seriously though, make sure you get a ride before it gets repo'd. :(

Ya. No joke. 90% of salary for a car payment. Nice.

Not a smart financial move, but it isn't 90% of his salary on a car payment. Assume that he put nothing down, 6 year term, 6% interest, and assume that he is putting away 15% to his 401k. That would be a $1,160 monthly payment on a $3890 monthly take-home, or 30% of his take-home.

Again, not a smart move financially, but it isn't 90% of his salary going to his car payment--it is 30% of his take home.

[Cherry Lane]

My everyday soft-shell Marmot jacket is probably close to 10 years old, and one of the pit zippers is falling apart. This means that the underside of the armpit will now be completely open unless I come up with some sort of fix.  Or I could just get a new coat for $200, but shoot, the rest of the coat is in pretty good shape. I was talking with a coworker/superior about it, and she said she didn't even own clothing that is ten years old.  I'm thinking really?  Not even old jeans?

I realized that the belt I'm wearing today is older than our newest employee, a recent college graduate.  I'm 41, and I bought this belt when I was in high school.

[jinga nation]

My everyday soft-shell Marmot jacket is probably close to 10 years old, and one of the pit zippers is falling apart. This means that the underside of the armpit will now be completely open unless I come up with some sort of fix.  Or I could just get a new coat for $200, but shoot, the rest of the coat is in pretty good shape. I was talking with a coworker/superior about it, and she said she didn't even own clothing that is ten years old.  I'm thinking really?  Not even old jeans?

I realized that the belt I'm wearing today is older than our newest employee, a recent college graduate.  I'm 41, and I bought this belt when I was in high school.

Similar, but Cherry Lane got me beat.

I bought a leather belt in India in '95, while on a family trip. Wore it for at least 5 years. My brother shared, then took it. My wife found it at my parents' home, took it. She's still wearing it at least once a week. It is still in a great condition. 20 years.

[HairyUpperLip]

My everyday soft-shell Marmot jacket is probably close to 10 years old, and one of the pit zippers is falling apart. This means that the underside of the armpit will now be completely open unless I come up with some sort of fix.  Or I could just get a new coat for $200, but shoot, the rest of the coat is in pretty good shape. I was talking with a coworker/superior about it, and she said she didn't even own clothing that is ten years old.  I'm thinking really?  Not even old jeans?

I realized that the belt I'm wearing today is older than our newest employee, a recent college graduate.  I'm 41, and I bought this belt when I was in high school.

Man, I think a lot of people that save even 99% of their salary probably have increased in waist size too much to keep their high school belts.

That said, at 31 my weight only fluctuates 4-10lbs from my high school weight and most of my belts have worn out just from wearing them. Also, I usually don't wear belts because I like buying the proper waist size.

How did you make your belts last so long? lol

[MgoSam]

My everyday soft-shell Marmot jacket is probably close to 10 years old, and one of the pit zippers is falling apart. This means that the underside of the armpit will now be completely open unless I come up with some sort of fix.  Or I could just get a new coat for $200, but shoot, the rest of the coat is in pretty good shape. I was talking with a coworker/superior about it, and she said she didn't even own clothing that is ten years old.  I'm thinking really?  Not even old jeans?

I realized that the belt I'm wearing today is older than our newest employee, a recent college graduate.  I'm 41, and I bought this belt when I was in high school.

For some reason it reminded me of this Simpsons clip.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-o-7MmhqNfA

[notquitefrugal]

Man, I think a lot of people that save even 99% of their salary probably have increased in waist size too much to keep their high school belts.

My belts still fit (although on different notches) but the pants on my suits are now tight. Never had a problem until I took a new job in a larger city with lots of good restaurants. Also, there are often sugary snacks on the table in the break room. Willpower is truly a finite thing...

[LennStar]

Willpower is truly a finite thing...

Oh yes, it is! Your willpower can get depleted by small things so that you dont have any left for gib things, too. That is why poor people often have no willpower - all that thinking about how to get work, to buy this little thing or not, how to get the kids to school... they use up half the willpower a company CEO has just by shopping.

But willpower also behaves like a muscle, you can train it.

[dragoncar]

My everyday soft-shell Marmot jacket is probably close to 10 years old, and one of the pit zippers is falling apart. This means that the underside of the armpit will now be completely open unless I come up with some sort of fix.  Or I could just get a new coat for $200, but shoot, the rest of the coat is in pretty good shape. I was talking with a coworker/superior about it, and she said she didn't even own clothing that is ten years old.  I'm thinking really?  Not even old jeans?

I realized that the belt I'm wearing today is older than our newest employee, a recent college graduate.  I'm 41, and I bought this belt when I was in high school.

I'm currently wearing a 100+ year old belt that belonged to my great grandfather.  Of course my grandfather had to replace the buckle.  And my father replaced the leather.  Still looks pretty good for its age

[FoodieCycles]

I work with mostly Women and hearing them talk about material items is quite amusing. Best comment so far: "I get 3 designer dresses each month for only $100. I just wear them and send them back... each month it charges me automatically and they send me 3 dresses..."

Ummm- Just me or is this absolutely insane? 1,200$ a year on dresses you don't even get to keep?!

[slugline]

I work with mostly Women and hearing them talk about material items is quite amusing. Best comment so far: "I get 3 designer dresses each month for only $100. I just wear them and send them back... each month it charges me automatically and they send me 3 dresses..."

Ummm- Just me or is this absolutely insane? 1,200$ a year on dresses you don't even get to keep?!

Well, considering the cost of upgrading one's housing to get more closet space to accommodate 36 new dresses a year, it sounds sane in comparison!

[Avidconsumer]

Buffalo David Bitton. They do imbetween sizes(odd numbers on waist for example) and they do not shrink like every other brand I've tried. I've gone through so many jeans from shrinkage. I don't re-wear dirty clothes. I've gotten too used to clean clothes all the time. After a while you can tell the difference.

[nawhite]

I don't re-wear dirty clothes. I've gotten too used to clean clothes all the time. After a while you can tell the difference.

Wait, what? Underwear and t-shirts sure, but what about jeans? Good denim is actually meant to be washed as little as possible. The less you wash it the longer it lasts. Not to mention the cost! Washing clothes is ridiculously expensive even if you do it at home. At home, drying a load of clothes costs $1-$3 per load and washing costs another $1 per load in water and gas to heat the water and electricity to spin the tank. Maybe if you worked at a Zoo or a preschool I would understand the "wash ever day" mindset, but my jeans usually last a week minimum without a wash.

[Avidconsumer]

Yea it's money well spent as far as I'm concerned. I'd forego a lot of luxuries to have clean clothes, towels, bed sheets.

[bsmith]

I don't re-wear dirty clothes. I've gotten too used to clean clothes all the time. After a while you can tell the difference.

Facepunch for hedonic adaptation. http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2011/10/22/what-is-hedonic-adaptation-and-how-can-it-turn-you-into-a-sukka/

[zolotiyeruki]

My father still regularly wears the blazer he got for a high school graduation present. He attended his fiftieth reunion this summer. He stopped growing at sixteen due to an illness or it probably wouldn't fit; most men I know grew more after finishing high school.

After my high school prom, the tuxedo rental shop gave me the option of buying the tuxedo for an extra $55.  I've had several occasions to wear that tux since, including our wedding.

[Kitsunegari]

May I add a non-money related one?

Coworker sees me pouring in my coffee milk from a recycled juice bottle, inquires about it, and I explain him I ain't drinking that dairy-fluff stuff they give for free, because it's not actual milk and I prefer knowing what I drink. He looks conspiratorially at me and asks me "Is it your own milk?". The guy next to me almost spit his coffee. (And no, I'm not lactating)

[bsmith]

May I add a non-money related one?

Coworker sees me pouring in my coffee milk from a recycled juice bottle, inquires about it, and I explain him I ain't drinking that dairy-fluff stuff they give for free, because it's not actual milk and I prefer knowing what I drink. He looks conspiratorially at me and asks me "Is it your own milk?". The guy next to me almost spit his coffee. (And no, I'm not lactating)

That's sexual harassment.

[Avidconsumer]

I don't re-wear dirty clothes. I've gotten too used to clean clothes all the time. After a while you can tell the difference.

Facepunch for hedonic adaptation. http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2011/10/22/what-is-hedonic-adaptation-and-how-can-it-turn-you-into-a-sukka/

It's just a matter of opinion. To me the cost is negligible compared to the benefit. Living in a house is hedonic in that case. Everyone's deserves facepunches. Showering is hedonic. We don't need to shower that often. Having clean clothes is the same as showering to me.

We sweat 0.8-1.4 liters a day and lose 40,000 skin cells, which is nice. I prefer my jeans a few pounds lighter I guess.

[Kitsunegari]

May I add a non-money related one?

Coworker sees me pouring in my coffee milk from a recycled juice bottle, inquires about it, and I explain him I ain't drinking that dairy-fluff stuff they give for free, because it's not actual milk and I prefer knowing what I drink. He looks conspiratorially at me and asks me "Is it your own milk?". The guy next to me almost spit his coffee. (And no, I'm not lactating)

That's sexual harassment.

Nah, the guy is gay, and from a culture that didn't explain him much about female anatomy. He just has no clue how the female body works.

[ShoulderThingThatGoesUp]

If I heard that I would need to take a walk around the block muttering "what the fuck?" to myself over and over. You are a truly tolerant person to not have said "what is wrong with you?"

[maco]

May I add a non-money related one?

Coworker sees me pouring in my coffee milk from a recycled juice bottle, inquires about it, and I explain him I ain't drinking that dairy-fluff stuff they give for free, because it's not actual milk and I prefer knowing what I drink. He looks conspiratorially at me and asks me "Is it your own milk?". The guy next to me almost spit his coffee. (And no, I'm not lactating)

That's sexual harassment.

Nah, the guy is gay, and from a culture that didn't explain him much about female anatomy. He just has no clue how the female body works.

That doesn't make it not sexual harassment. Gay men can absolutely sexually harass women, just like straight women can sexually harass women.

[Kitsunegari]

If I heard that I would need to take a walk around the block muttering "what the fuck?" to myself over and over. You are a truly tolerant person to not have said "what is wrong with you?"

Well, a few months ago he ask me if during the period we see the egg that is dying, so I know he's a bit ignorant on some regards.
This is why we need sex ed in schools, people!

[Kitsunegari]

May I add a non-money related one?

Coworker sees me pouring in my coffee milk from a recycled juice bottle, inquires about it, and I explain him I ain't drinking that dairy-fluff stuff they give for free, because it's not actual milk and I prefer knowing what I drink. He looks conspiratorially at me and asks me "Is it your own milk?". The guy next to me almost spit his coffee. (And no, I'm not lactating)

That's sexual harassment.

Nah, the guy is gay, and from a culture that didn't explain him much about female anatomy. He just has no clue how the female body works.

That doesn't make it not sexual harassment. Gay men can absolutely sexually harass women, just like straight women can sexually harass women.

He was not intimidating or offensive. I reconize gay people can harrass straight people of same or opposite gender, but this was not the case.

[mm1970]

Willpower is truly a finite thing...

Oh yes, it is! Your willpower can get depleted by small things so that you dont have any left for gib things, too. That is why poor people often have no willpower - all that thinking about how to get work, to buy this little thing or not, how to get the kids to school... they use up half the willpower a company CEO has just by shopping.

But willpower also behaves like a muscle, you can train it.

I realized this on vacation staying with family.  Fridges full of soda, beer, sugary snacks, chips, candy.

I put as much stuff away as I could.

But seriously, I hadn't realized how much of my at home willpower is because I just don't have that stuff around.

[MrMoogle]

Willpower is truly a finite thing...

Oh yes, it is! Your willpower can get depleted by small things so that you dont have any left for gib things, too. That is why poor people often have no willpower - all that thinking about how to get work, to buy this little thing or not, how to get the kids to school... they use up half the willpower a company CEO has just by shopping.

But willpower also behaves like a muscle, you can train it.

It takes a little willpower to not buy it at the store, but a lot of willpower not to eat it once it's been bought.  Once it's home, I've already eaten it in my mind.
I realized this on vacation staying with family.  Fridges full of soda, beer, sugary snacks, chips, candy.

I put as much stuff away as I could.

But seriously, I hadn't realized how much of my at home willpower is because I just don't have that stuff around.

[Sam E]

May I add a non-money related one?

Coworker sees me pouring in my coffee milk from a recycled juice bottle, inquires about it, and I explain him I ain't drinking that dairy-fluff stuff they give for free, because it's not actual milk and I prefer knowing what I drink. He looks conspiratorially at me and asks me "Is it your own milk?". The guy next to me almost spit his coffee. (And no, I'm not lactating)

That's sexual harassment.

Nah, the guy is gay, and from a culture that didn't explain him much about female anatomy. He just has no clue how the female body works.

That doesn't make it not sexual harassment. Gay men can absolutely sexually harass women, just like straight women can sexually harass women.

Harassment is always in the eye of the beholder. If she didn't feel harassed, it wasn't harassment. There's no point in trying to convince someone to get offended at something that didn't offend them.

[maco]

May I add a non-money related one?

Coworker sees me pouring in my coffee milk from a recycled juice bottle, inquires about it, and I explain him I ain't drinking that dairy-fluff stuff they give for free, because it's not actual milk and I prefer knowing what I drink. He looks conspiratorially at me and asks me "Is it your own milk?". The guy next to me almost spit his coffee. (And no, I'm not lactating)

That's sexual harassment.

Nah, the guy is gay, and from a culture that didn't explain him much about female anatomy. He just has no clue how the female body works.

That doesn't make it not sexual harassment. Gay men can absolutely sexually harass women, just like straight women can sexually harass women.

Harassment is always in the eye of the beholder. If she didn't feel harassed, it wasn't harassment. There's no point in trying to convince someone to get offended at something that didn't offend them.

Just in case she was offended at the time and was then trying to rationalize it away after. Rationalizing rape away is common; why wouldn't it be for harassment?

[maco]

Willpower is truly a finite thing...

Oh yes, it is! Your willpower can get depleted by small things so that you dont have any left for gib things, too. That is why poor people often have no willpower - all that thinking about how to get work, to buy this little thing or not, how to get the kids to school... they use up half the willpower a company CEO has just by shopping.

But willpower also behaves like a muscle, you can train it.

I realized this on vacation staying with family.  Fridges full of soda, beer, sugary snacks, chips, candy.

I put as much stuff away as I could.

But seriously, I hadn't realized how much of my at home willpower is because I just don't have that stuff around.

I keep trying to explain this to the other members of my household >_<

[dragoncar]

Willpower is truly a finite thing...

Oh yes, it is! Your willpower can get depleted by small things so that you dont have any left for gib things, too. That is why poor people often have no willpower - all that thinking about how to get work, to buy this little thing or not, how to get the kids to school... they use up half the willpower a company CEO has just by shopping.

But willpower also behaves like a muscle, you can train it.

I realized this on vacation staying with family.  Fridges full of soda, beer, sugary snacks, chips, candy.

I put as much stuff away as I could.

But seriously, I hadn't realized how much of my at home willpower is because I just don't have that stuff around.

I keep trying to explain this to the other members of my household >_<

Never shop hungry

[notquitefrugal]

But seriously, I hadn't realized how much of my at home willpower is because I just don't have that stuff around.

That's my strategy. I don't buy bread or sweets to keep in my house. I'll gladly buy them to leave at work or at other peoples' houses, though!

Seems to be a common strategy. A lady at work wanted a piece of caramel cake, so she made a caramel cake, ate one piece, and brought the rest to work the next day. It was gone in about an hour.

[notquitefrugal]

In copier room...

CW: Damn, the machine is out of paper again, why doesn't anyone load this thing.

Opens a skein of paper, removes 3 sheets, puts them in the side feed, hits print, leaves open skein on top of printer and walks out.

Me: Cringe.

I'm not sure what the etiquette is on this. Our "big" copier holds 10+ reams of paper. Maybe 15. I reloaded it with about 4-5 reams the other day, not filling it full, because this is not a time of year when that machine sees a lot of volume. Also, I wasn't 100% sure which trays/stacks are supposed to have plain white paper. Should I have tried to fill everything with plain paper?

[nobodyspecial]

I'm not sure what the etiquette is on this. Our "big" copier holds 10+ reams of paper. ...Should I have tried to fill everything with plain paper?

You should write "I will kill again !!!" in red lipstick on the back of a singe sheet in the middle of the stack - especially if you are a govt dept that sends out lots of PR stuff 

[LeRainDrop]

I work with mostly Women and hearing them talk about material items is quite amusing. Best comment so far: "I get 3 designer dresses each month for only $100. I just wear them and send them back... each month it charges me automatically and they send me 3 dresses..."

Ummm- Just me or is this absolutely insane? 1,200$ a year on dresses you don't even get to keep?!

But . . . but . . . they are *designer*!!!

[11ducks]

I'm not sure what the etiquette is on this. Our "big" copier holds 10+ reams of paper. ...Should I have tried to fill everything with plain paper?

You should write "I will kill again !!!" in red lipstick on the back of a singe sheet in the middle of the stack - especially if you are a govt dept that sends out lots of PR stuff

I am so doing this at work tomorrow...

[pancakes]

I had the strangest conversation with someone at work. They run their own business and are working with us for a short time.

They flat our asked me what my salary is which is strange and I figured some kind of power game because they continued to drop into the conversation references to what other people earn and the fact that he earns more. When that figure got up to $250k I made a comment that if I earned that much I would only need to work for a few years.

This apparently wasn't something they had ever considered and I was delivered a lecture about how if you have money you just find new ways to spend it.

When I explained that I save half of what I earn (which is far less) he just stared at me in utter shock. He showed me pictures of his collection of classic cars thinking that I would be impressed and I responded that I didn't own a car because I didn't need one. Apparently this was also the first time he had encountered an adult who didn't own a car.