Give Up the Hooch: Booze Free for as long as you please!

[Neustache]

Fantastic Money Badger! Keep it up!

[Bean05]

Just a quick check-in, I am still sober and liking it. I had two worriesome scenarios, with my parents coming to town and my husband’s band playing at a brewery, but I came through both just fine with soda and sparkling water.

I’m glad to be showing my 16 year old that you can enjoy life sober.

[Money Badger]

@Bean05,  Way to go!   

[danakado]

Just want to chime and thank everyone for this thread.  I needed to read all this and to see the ideas.  My nightly "glass of wine" habit really has grip on me in a way that I don't like.  I can make the same argument with my morning coffee but alcohol truly is different.  I went dry last week Mon-Friday and it was great.  I had wine Sat and Sunday but will get back on track this week.  I haven't concluded I need to full board quit but I need to seriously cut back.  It was harder than I want to admit.  The drink alternatives (esp the grapefruit juice with soda water) were very helpful.  The evening wine is very ritual based for me and I need all the help I can get to find new rituals.  That time of night is usually when I can finally sit down and relax and read. 
Anyway, as always I find great advice on these forums.....! 

[Neustache]

Managed to not drink during a cabin trip.  Pretty big deal for me!  I used to go to the cabin all the time and not drink, but then it became a habit to drink.  16 days with no drinking....sad that it's an accomplishment but there you go!

[mspym]

@danakado you are doing great. I found a nice cup of tea now serves the ritual purpose. I get to look at my choices, decide which one suits how i am feeling today, and then sit and drink a nice beverage that was thoughtfully chosen.

[danakado]

@danakado you are doing great. I found a nice cup of tea now serves the ritual purpose. I get to look at my choices, decide which one suits how i am feeling today, and then sit and drink a nice beverage that was thoughtfully chosen.

Thank you!  I want to love tea but I don't.  I do also like kombuchu and now that Costco carries some it's cheaper.  The hardest part is pouring that instead of wine.  Once I'm drinking it I don't really care but making that better choice feels pretty hard.  Just last night I was about to pity party myself into wine instead.  It's embarrassing to admit this but I'm also glad to be working through this.   Because I was not drinking a lot (1 sometimes 2 glasses) it was pretty easy to blow it off.  And I guess I think I still want to.  What is the line?  Is it the mental addiction?  And like I mentioned before, I have the same relationship with coffee.  With coffee I moved to mostly decaf but still, if asked to give it up all together I would be seriously sad. 

I was also hoping that no drinking would be a miracle sleep fix.  I do think it's helped but not sure I can call it a miracle? 

[BikeFanatic]

I do not like tea much either, and I hear you on the coffee!
Please give the sleep a little more time to evaluate it. I noticed after two - three weeks that I slept better, I dreamed more, and remembered my dreams. Even if you do not drink much I think you need a reset - like 2-3 weeks to feel the benefits.
Some would say if you drink weekly, and alcohol lasts 7-10 day in the body, then you are in a constant state of low level withdrawal until those 7-10 days are through. I felt really great after 3 weeks without booze and then later maybe 6 weeks as well a big uptick in energy at those times
( maybe from the improved sleep?)

Kombucha on the rocks is a nice wine substitute, and if you really like it , you can make it easily. Just need a SCOBY. I also do selzter with Lemon, much more economical.  Good luck

[mspym]

For me, it was when wine became The Only Stress Relief that I knew I needed to make the switch. Never physically addicted but it had to be entirely off the table for me to build up the other tools in my solution set.

In terms of timeframes to clear, 7-10 days gets it out of your system, there's a dramatic increase in braincell regrowth around 90 days that often triggers drinking urges but increases clarity if you get past it and them again around 1 year.

Kombucha, fancy vinegars in seltzer, splash of juice in soda water. I recommend a Fancyarse Glass so you get the special drink feeling

[BikeFanatic]

mspym
That is very interesting about the brain cell regrowth. Between that and reduced risk of Breast cancer, I am glad to be AF for over six months , here is to a year, ( raises fancy arse glass of Kombucha).

[mspym]

@BikeFanatic *raises cup of tea* i was surprised about the correlation between alcohol and breast cancer. Given my family history, i am pleased to finally be reducing that risk factor

[CrustyBadger]

In terms of timeframes to clear, 7-10 days gets it out of your system, there's a dramatic increase in braincell regrowth around 90 days that often triggers drinking urges but increases clarity if you get past it and them again around 1 year.

Interesting!  I'm getting close to the 90 day mark I think and have been noticing more cravings lately when I hadn't been feeling them for so long!  I thought it was maybe just the fact that the weather was getting colder and darker.

I'm trying to reframe my longings and cravings for a nice cold beer as "I really want a nice ice cold glass of water" and drink water like crazy because I think haf the time when I craved a drink, I was truly just thirsty!

[Eckhart]

Loving this thread.

I'm two years alcohol free today!  Started as a one year experiment.  Feels so good to sleep well every night and wake up refreshed that I just kept going.

I am sure at some point in the future I will have a drink a social gathering or celebration, but these days I'm happy to be the DD, and let the DW have a few.

Keep it up everyone, it's worth it.

[Money Badger]

Will be falling off the wagon for the "World's Largest Cocktail Party" in Jacksonville for the UGA-FL game...  I'm now genuinely curious to see how I feel Sunday and next week given recent temperance...   Stay tuned for next week's post with the results (or testimony?) 

[BikeFanatic]

Sure, I would like to hear your honest experience. Maybe you can commit to a month aftercthe game and see how that goes.

[Latestarter73]

In terms of timeframes to clear, 7-10 days gets it out of your system, there's a dramatic increase in braincell regrowth around 90 days that often triggers drinking urges but increases clarity if you get past it and them again around 1 year.

Interesting!  I'm getting close to the 90 day mark I think and have been noticing more cravings lately when I hadn't been feeling them for so long!  I thought it was maybe just the fact that the weather was getting colder and darker.

I'm trying to reframe my longings and cravings for a nice cold beer as "I really want a nice ice cold glass of water" and drink water like crazy because I think haf the time when I craved a drink, I was truly just thirsty!

Hi CrustyBadger (cool name!), checking in as suggested. Is it possible to tag/follow threads in the MMM forum? I haven't seen any form of favourites function yet.

[mspym]

@Latestarter73 the easiest way to follow a thread is to post in it, and from then on if there are any updates they will show if you click on the 'show new replies to your posts' link just under your user name. There is a subscribe option but then it spams your inbox.

[Money Badger]

@BikeFanatic and all,   OK, here's the result from my "off the wagon" weekend...  I certainly drank a LOT less than prior game long weekends over a 4 day period...  And I have sworn off wine.   Simply killed my sleep and overall happiness level the next day, even just 2 glasses worth.   One day of bourbon at the game was relatively few side effects by comparison though.  Worst of all, I put back on about 5 of the 10 lbs I'd lost just from the brief bender.   So now back onto my bike and enough of the sauce for "Sober-vember"...   Goal is at least 50 miles on the bike and 10lbs off my arse!

[BikeFanatic]

Thanks for the update! I love Sober vember. I plan a foray myself  this weekend and am a tad nervous about being re addicted. We shall see.

[brute]

Well, I drank for the first time in a month or so on Halloween. Eff that. Felt like hell the next day even though I didn't drink that much. Think I'll take the rest of the year off and go easy at new years.

[Neustache]

It's been 4 weeks.  I'm probably having a drink tonight, but just one.  I'm super glad I broke the cycle that I had fallen into, and I might be back again for another break later.  Thanks to all for this thread! 

[lexde]

I’m doing “sober November”. Not that I drink to excess, but I’m cutting carbs and feel like my waistline and wallet will both thank me for this.

[aneel]

You all inspired me. Also have to share some credit with the hangover I woke up with yesterday. I am not going to drink at home anymore. In a move where I have to be anti-mustachian to achieve mustachian goals, I plan to only drink socially. I really don't feel having a beer at home adds to my life, but going out to enjoy a drink or two with a friend on occasion (at the same rate I do today) does add joy to my life. The home drinking feels like added drinking with no added joy. We'll see how I can do with moderation as my DH is habitual drinker and always offers to share.

[Money Badger]

@aneel, That's a good point about the joy of social drinking vs. the "habitual home" drinking...    It takes the edge off business meetings and other awkward gatherings (neighborhood dinner party or book club anyone?)   And it certainly reduces intake to realize you're paying $5 or more a glass at the restaurant than drinking cheaply "in bulk" at home.    A rare case where it's good to pay more at the restaurant/bar than at home.

[CrustyBadger]

I've had an extremely stressful weekend, capping a stressful week, and for the first time since going alcohol free over the summer, find myself really struggling with cravings for alcohol.  It is very clear to me that I actually want to medicate myself in some way to deal with the emotions I am feeling.

I am having deep cravings for one (or two or three) shots of vodka, over ice.   I haven't felt this strongly in quite some time.

I'm not going to drink; I've decided for myself that I am done with that.  That was my choice and only for me.  But I think I need some other strategies for dealing with the emotions I am feeling.  Simply sitting with the cravings, acknowledging them, and letting them pass worked in the past but isn't working now.

[Moustachienne]

I've had an extremely stressful weekend, capping a stressful week, and for the first time since going alcohol free over the summer, find myself really struggling with cravings for alcohol.  It is very clear to me that I actually want to medicate myself in some way to deal with the emotions I am feeling.

I am having deep cravings for one (or two or three) shots of vodka, over ice.   I haven't felt this strongly in quite some time.

I'm not going to drink; I've decided for myself that I am done with that.  That was my choice and only for me.  But I think I need some other strategies for dealing with the emotions I am feeling.  Simply sitting with the cravings, acknowledging them, and letting them pass worked in the past but isn't working now.

I totally hear you on this although my lifestyle change wasn't alcohol.  It's blindsiding to have such strong cravings after months of smooth(er) sailing.

I have some alternative treats/activities to reach for as well as reminding myself how good the life change has been feeling. But not going to lie - it's a shock when this happens.  Humbling and hard.  Hang in there! 

Edited to say that this is a wakeup call to develop some future coping strategies now you know this will happen and how it feels.  Sorry this isn't more helpful right in the moment now.

[CrustyBadger]

Thanks, @Moustachienne !

Yeah, I wondered if there was even a point to sending a semi-anonymous post out to the forum, detailing a personal struggle like that.  But I wanted to share with someone and don't want to reach out to people I know in real life.

A good cry, a hot bath, a few glasses of water (for hydration) and then some ice cold orange juice with (this is weird) some Tabasco sauce on top seemed to help.  The combination of sweet/spicy flavors on my tongue were enough of a jolt that I think it interrupted my craving (and the sugar rush from the OJ maybe helped.)   A good night's sleep cures many ills as well, perhaps.

[mspym]

 @CrustyBadger  ]I think sometimes just saying the words can be enough to acknowledge the feeling (I want to) , and reinforce the decision (not going to) you have already made. It continues to surprise me at times 18 months in but now I know that the craving means "I feel sad and I want a treat" and I have a list now of other treats that are better for me.

I like your action plan and am pleased it worked!

[smoghat]

Dry January for me. I don't want to quit drinking, just get it under more control.

I think in February I'll go back, but limit myself to 3 days a week and no booze when I'm stressed or feeling down. That way is bad.

So far what I'm most impressed by is how much more energy I have late in the evening. I'm up at 1 now (was up at 2 last night and woke up at 8 this morning) I'm sure 7 hours from now I won't feel as sleep deprived as if I'd hit the booze.

[Morning Glory]

My DH and I are doing dry January as well. We are not heavy drinkers but 1-2 glasses of wine a night were becoming a bad habit. So far I don't really feel any different, except for feeling hung over a couple days in, which was weird.  I also get a craving each night while making dinner but it passes after dinnertime.

[onemorebike]

Op here. I love that this is still going! I'm not always commenting but watching as they roll in and there is a lot of inspiration here. Keep it up, everyone!

This month I'm approaching a year of no booze so i pulled my financials from the alcohol bar category and compared to 2017. We have spent $2,400 less in 2018! Not directly related but close is our restaurant spending also went down by $1,400! We followed Frugal Woods 30 day challenge late in the year and also managed to cut our grocery expenses by about $6,000. Helluva a sober year financially and I haven't even talked about how much my added energy and motivation has impacted other aspects of life. Was excited to share with those of you on the same journey.

Sent from my Moto G (5) Plus using Tapatalk

[PoutineLover]

Im doing dry january but I did have an exception that was preplanned. So far doesn't seem too difficult, but I'm only a week in so we'll see. Social situations where I'd normally drink are the hardest, but after the holidays I'm ready to just chill. Right now it even feels like I want to go longer, but that may change by the end of the month.

[CrustyBadger]

Thanks for starting this thread, @onemorebike !  It's been very supportive!

[Evasion]

Trying a short dry January. Day 2 tonight, but the weekend is coming.
I have always been a heavy drinker and have issues at times, but I also realised I spend about $300 a month on it, which is ridiculous. Pretty much my 3rd budget category after rent and groceries.
So I will make more efforts this year for this sake as well as my mental and physical health.
Hope to be back on this thread to share and encourage e AC h other.
Now off to bed for day 3 tomorrow

[onemorebike]

Trying a short dry January. Day 2 tonight, but the weekend is coming.
I have always been a heavy drinker and have issues at times, but I also realised I spend about $300 a month on it, which is ridiculous. Pretty much my 3rd budget category after rent and groceries.
So I will make more efforts this year for this sake as well as my mental and physical health.
Hope to be back on this thread to share and encourage e AC h other.
Now off to bed for day 3 tomorrow

Evasion, have you checked out the 30-day alcohol experiment? A great companion to a dry January.

Sent from my Moto G (5) Plus using Tapatalk

[Gail2000]

Hello all,

I am on day 4. I started this for a couple of reasons. I don’t sleep properly and it really does affect my mood. Although in the past couple of spdays I can’t say it’s improved but gotten a bit worse. So I’m not saying I’m going to start again but am examining the detox process that I imagine is the culprit to the grumpiness.

The boost it will give our budget will be welcomed. This year is really a focus one budget and savings. Considering our income of 90k annually I would expect we could have a positive net worth within Two years. 

[MakesCents]

Following thread

[Morning Glory]

Hello all,

I am on day 4. I started this for a couple of reasons. I don’t sleep properly and it really does affect my mood. Although in the past couple of spdays I can’t say it’s improved but gotten a bit worse. So I’m not saying I’m going to start again but am examining the detox process that I imagine is the culprit to the grumpiness.

The boost it will give our budget will be welcomed. This year is really a focus one budget and savings. Considering our income of 90k annually I would expect we could have a positive net worth within Two years.

My sleep got worse for the first week but then went back to baseline. Hang in there, and make sure you aren't replacing alcohol with caffeine. One thing I have noticed is that I wake up to pee more often at night due to drinking herbal tea instead of wine before bed. On the bright side, I have lost a couple pounds without really changing anything else.

[PoutineLover]

How's everyone doing, especially those doing dry January? I had 2 nights where I drank with friends, and 2 desserts that included a small amount of alcohol. It's harder than I thought,  but only because of the social settings. Physically and mentally, I've been fine, and I'm only tempted when I'm with friends I usually drink with. Going to continue for the rest of the month anyway. I really want a straight 30 stretch with no cheating, so I think I'm going to give it up for lent as well, now that I've had the practice.

[Bracken_Joy]

I'm on day 24. I decided before the new year I'd go all the way through my third IVF retrieval with no drinking, in the hopes of helping outcomes. It's amazing how much a black and white view has helped. I'm not even taking sips of drinks if my husband has one or anything like that. Just straight up, no alcohol. It's been easier to stick to this time, I think largely because my husband operates in absolutes. Just because grey areas/just sips has worked for *me* in the past, he'll unintentionally undermine me/enable me because that's not how *he* commits to a goal. It's just interesting- I had never thought about needing to work around HIS way of approaching a change (absolutist vs moderator), rather than just mine.

Anyway, just an interesting insight I had to this whole thing. Still a ways to go, I'll be no drinking through mid-March at least.

[LWYRUP]

I'm joining with a few exceptions.  I've got four beers in my basement.  I reserve the right to drink one or two of those.  My parents and I split a small membership at a local winery.  I get the equivalent of one bottle of wine a month.  I allow myself maximum of two beers if I go out to a bar with a friend or, in the summer, if I have a friend over to grill.  (I've got a busy job and little kids so this is a once a week or two type thing).

So, I expect like a couple drinks a month rather than 5-10 a week.  $0 spend in my alcohol category this month (though I did have a few beers out layered into the eating out budget).

[Gail2000]

My sleep got worse for the first week but then went back to baseline. Hang in there, and make sure you aren't replacing alcohol with caffeine. One thing I have noticed is that I wake up to pee more often at night due to drinking herbal tea instead of wine before bed. On the bright side, I have lost a couple pounds without really changing anything else.

There were a few nights that were hard like you said. Trying carbonated water at dinner. MBe the same issue as the tea occurs so I have been a bit of a zombie. Thinking caffeine and alcohol have to go? Did you have to give it up as well?
 My husband brought out a bottle of maple licure ( Canadian and proud!)  so I have had a shot to sip on that this week. So not a dry week.

Op here. I love that this is still going! I'm not always commenting but watching as they roll in and there is a lot of inspiration here. Keep it up, everyone!

This month I'm approaching a year of no booze so i pulled my financials from the alcohol bar category and compared to 2017. We have spent $2,400 less in 2018! Not directly related but close is our restaurant spending also went down by $1,400! We followed Frugal Woods 30 day challenge late in the year and also managed to cut our grocery expenses by about $6,000. Helluva a sober year financially and I haven't even talked about how much my added energy and motivation has impacted other aspects of life. Was excited to share with those of you on the same journey.

Sent from my Moto G (5) Plus using Tapatalk

Congratulations!

A nd this is disconcertingly hard.

[ToTheMoon]

Hi guys - I claimed back in May that I was in for this challenge -then did absolutely nothing to change my behaviour.  I finally decided in November to take another look at my alcohol intake, and also requested Annie Grace's book, This Naked Mind, and read it.  I haven't yet identified exactly what it was, but something in there resonated with me, and I have not had an alcoholic beverage since.  Just quietly celebrating my 2 month mark yesterday! 

I have requested the book again from the library, as I would love to read it again to see if I can identify the portions that really "spoke" to me, and I have just learned that she also has a podcast that I think I will give a try.

Now can someone help me with the raging sugar addiction that seems to be moving into the space that alcohol was previously inhabiting? :D

[CrustyBadger]

Now can someone help me with the raging sugar addiction that seems to be moving into the space that alcohol was previously inhabiting? :D

I did a kind of keto-low carb diet for two months when I stopped drinking alcohol.   Drank lots of water and kept my carbs really really low.  I couldn't stay on the low carb meal plan due to family cooking responsibilities just being too challenging.  But I believe the experienced helped keep me from chowing down on the sugar.

[ToTheMoon]

Now can someone help me with the raging sugar addiction that seems to be moving into the space that alcohol was previously inhabiting? :D

I did a kind of keto-low carb diet for two months when I stopped drinking alcohol.   Drank lots of water and kept my carbs really really low.  I couldn't stay on the low carb meal plan due to family cooking responsibilities just being too challenging.  But I believe the experienced helped keep me from chowing down on the sugar.

@CrustyBadger   Thanks for this - I need to be more aware.  I have definitely filled the caloric-space with carbs.  More water and more awareness should definitely help.

[happyuk]

I'm lucky i that I have never been overly fond of alcohol and hence found it easy to give up.

In my younger and less mature days of course there were some spectacular foul-ups; various opportunities with attractive young women ruined because I was somewhat smashed.

Stick with it, you'll enjoy it (not having hangovers, being skint, unfit, becoming prematurely old etc).

However, my biggest objection to alcohol isn't even the health / financial factors.  It's what people become when they've had a lot of drink - bores at best, raging assholes at worst.

The only thing to say to people who query why you don't drink (and why does "drink" always mean alcohol?) is "doctor's orders" or something similar. You don't have to justify your social life choices to anyone!

[happyuk]

Jordan Peterson, an academic I consider to be sane, grounded, knowledgeable and articulate gives some top-notch presentations on why we should forsake alcohol:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r6WQEGULvH8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQPz4YVSkyQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xVMPMiYzF4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryp2k2D6Zvc

As with any other kind of substance abuse, alcohol abuse ALWAYS involves massive denial and aggravates whatever underlying problems the user seeks to alleviate.

[wenchsenior]

I want to extend a huge thank you to all the posters who mentioned This Naked Mind. 

I've been a (near) daily drinker for about 20 years and a recent diagnosis of esophagus damage from severe 'silent' reflux (reflux that doesn't cause any heartburn) has caused me to get serious about trying to cut down.  The alcohol itself did not cause the damage, and alcohol is only one of pretty much every element of my diet contributing to reflux (seriously, 90% of my daily intake is on the do-not-ingest list), but it contributes through relaxing the esophageal valve.

But I have been totally resistant to completely giving it up, mainly b/c in 20+ years of drinking, I've experienced no obvious downsides.  One traditional hangover, and a handful of bad headaches.  A couple of arguments with DH that probably were exacerbated my 'filters' being down.

I just couldn't relate to the horror stories I always hear from people who want to stop drinking: no blackouts (never even knew what those were), drunk driving, fuzzy memories, weight gain, embarrassing incidents, missed work, damaged relationships. Nope, I had none of that, probably b/c I typically never drink more than 2 drinks per day. All I had were 20+ years of pleasant memories of fun vacations, socializing, and most esp, being able to turn off my hyper brain and relax at the end of the day.

But that's the rub, right? I realize over the years that I've become psychologically dependent on that 'relaxation' trigger occurring if I'm stressed out, or to transition from work to non-work.  And as my tolerance has gradually crept up over the years, I have recently started to be tempted to increase my amount a little.  And that slope goes one way.

I started dipping into the NM podcast and book a month or so ago, while simultaneously journaling how my daily drinking routine made me feel.  Then I started skipping drinking a day here and there to see how that felt.  Within a very short amount of time my attitude has begun changing, and suddenly giving up drinking (at least as an experiment) started to sound less like a hardship and more like an exciting endeavor.

So I'm in. For a month at least.

[mspym]

@wenchsenior I fell into the trap of alcohol being the only reset switch for my brain between work and not-work, but it is a lie. A cup of tea, a fancy glass with some juice & soda water, a walk in the park with my dog, any of these can also be a transition. And now, my baseline stress level is a lot lower and I wonder how much of it was chemical reactions to the alcohol and sugar load I was dumping into my body. It's been over a year since I woke up freaking out at 3am and I don't miss it at all.

[tightwaddy]

I last had a drink 5 weeks ago today (SuperBowl) after years of essentially daily drinking and multiple (many dozens) of attempts at cutting back, or "moderation."  It's been an interesting 5 weeks, with many different observations along the way. At one point I experienced clarity of mind so sharp it almost felt painful--I don't know how to describe it otherwise; it's starting to feel more normal, but wow.  I knew 2-4 beers a day probably weren't doing wonders for my liver or waistline, but I never imagined they were having such an effect on my brain (though in retrospect, that's pretty dumb).

Anyway, I didn't really start this thinking I'd never drink again. But now I'm wondering.