I'm still on track for my 4/30 date, but I wanted to ask... despite how free and happy I feel on the days I'm not tied to my job, and despite being financially prepared and "knowing" I have the assets to handle this.. surely I'm not the only person scared shitless?
It feels so final. And there's such a large part of me that says, your job isn't so bad, imagine how much more money you'll have even with just one more year... even if you don't care that much about money, still, it's significant....
It's weirdly very, very scary.
You are NOT alone. I've been constantly ping-ponging between ecstatic jubilation and an anxiety puddle, it's practically bipolar. Although I've been working towards this goal for the past 15 years and am thrilled to finally get there, I'm still half-expecting to chicken out, delay/procrastinate, or for something -- anything! -- to go off the rails (including checking the markets every day, which I usually make a point not to do).
Not at all. I had a pretty sleepless night last night worrying about it. I actually ended up trying to find evidence of people who FIRE'd more than 5-10 Y ago without pensions, army payments, or real estate - just an equities/bonds portfolio in the middle of the night (since that's what we're doing) before getting back to sleep.
I'm in a similar situation, where all my assets except for primary residence are paper assets -- there's no rental real estate, no side hustle/business, no pension (except maybe Social Security) -- and a really bloody long way till Medicare in a country with a shitastic healthcare safety net.
My reaction has been far less healthy than yours, though. Instead of seeking positive validation, I've been going on Bogleheads and looking for threads where folks are seeking permission to FIRE, and watching them get inevitably torn down for being too young, too frugal, too ignorant, or not rich enough. I've also been running Monte Carlo simulations with increasingly outrageous parameters just to see how much punishment my stash can('t) take. Apparently, I cope by torturing myself, heh.
I've seen the topic mentioned a few times, but do you have any recommendations on WHAT to tell your coworkers, employees, boss, friends, and family about leaving your well-paying job?
I'm still on track to leave this spring. I've spoken to my boss already, so he knows this may be coming, but I don't feel like telling anyone else that I'm retiring in my 40’s is the right way to go. I'm fairly young and don't want to alienate my friends and family (my family thinks all millionaires can have their own private planes and limo drivers). I also don’t want to lie.
Here’s my initial thought: Tell my coworkers and employees that I’m leaving the company to go back to school. This wouldn’t be a lie considering there are a bunch of topics I want to learn and many colleges make their courseware available for free.
I may also do some consulting work if the opportunity presents itself, so if asked what I’m doing about income, I could mention that.
I know I probably shouldn’t worry about this as much as I am, but I feel like there’s a stigma with leaving a high-paying job – especially at a young age.
I've been thinking about this lately too - I'm planning to leave ~June, but haven't solidified a date. Absolutely nobody at work has any idea it's coming. I am a manager and feel like it's too soon to tell my boss and subordinates, but I'm quietly trying to put things in a good state for someone else to take over, and will ramp that up over the next few months. I think I'll give 6 weeks notice. I haven't told any friends at work since I think it's too much to ask for them to keep the secret - and it would be terrible if it got out before I get to tell my boss and those that report to me.
Other than trying to leave on good terms and make sure I'm not leaving a mess behind, I'm not too worried about what my non-friend co-workers think about the "why" since I probably won't keep in touch with them. I mainly don't want to leave them with the impression that I'm unhappy with them, so I'll try to make it clear that "it's me, not you". @mindfulrun, do you think you want to stay in touch with yours, or perhaps consult for your company if the opportunity presents? If not, why do you care what they think?
I'm struggling with this bit, too. While I have a reputation for being frugal and financially savvy, there is no way folks won't be completely blindsided by an early retirement. And it's not just stigma due to age; it's also being perceived as flighty and undedicated (I anchor a major set of projects and there is no way to extricate gracefully without screwing the team over).
I finally told one of my coworkers (who is a close friend that I trust completely) at the end of last year, after she confided in me that she was frustrated at work and thinking of leaving. She initially thought I also meant leaving as in changing jobs, so I decided to straight up tell her. I was really conflicted because I've never told anyone at work before, but I'm glad that I did, because she was super supportive, and may be able to serve as a valuable sounding board as I navigate this year.
My current plan (subject to change) is to use the cliche that I want to spend more time with family. Maybe it won't be terribly convincing because I don't have (or want) kids, so I was considering also announcing an engagement (although the real reason I'd get married is because I may have to go on SO's health insurance after retirement and possibly lower his taxes, but they don't have to know that the cause-and-effect is reversed, LOL). When asked about income, I'm probably going to say that my SO is still working and we have enough, and just let them draw their own conclusions.
Does it hurt my feminist heart to have people believe that I'm giving up a successful and lucrative career to be with a man? Absolutely. But as galling as it is, I still think it may be safer to lean into that stereotype than to flaunt the truth, and have them believe that I'm somehow lazy or didn't love my job enough, on the off chance that I do need another job or a reference in the future.
