For all those here who wish to see me punished for my contrarian views, you will get your wish.
I have to attend a work holiday party with my spouse and will be confronted with the dreaded "so what do you do" question. I never know what to say in these situations and am always embarrassed. Below are some of the answers I have used in the past.
"I figured out how I can afford to do nothing"
"I am a laid off -----"
"I own things that make it so that I can do what I want all day"
"I ski"
"I am a kept husband"
Rest assured I will be uncomfortable for several hours. All here can take delight at my humiliations.
Jesus. The martyrdom is SO thick.
No one wants to see you "punished".
At a minimum, it would be nice if you could at least acknowledge that what is right (or in this case, wrong) for you isn't necessarily right (or wrong) for everyone. Instead, you basically said anyone who is FIRE is a bad parent because they are setting a bad example. That's jsut a lousy, judgmental, small-minded, myopic thing to say, and to be believe.
If FIRE (which I still maintain you've never actually experienced since you went from your corporate job to your "manual labor" property management job***), isn't a good fit for you, fine. Don't do it. Get a job. But don't yuck someone else's yum. It's incredibly condescending to suppose that you know better then other people what is best for them, especially when so many here are FIRE and incredibly happy, something you maintain is essentially not possible. So you can see the truth of their lives better than them, and know better than they do what makes them happy?
You seem to think that most FIREd people "shut off" their "work ethic, ambition, and drive". Again, what a small-minded and ignorant view that is. My dad is in his late 70s. He serves on the board of his very large HOA, which probably eats up 20 hours a week. He uses his expertise (data systems management, basically) to help the organization, as well as his leadership skills. He also does nearly all of the house and yard work, even in his 70s. He's always out trimming bushes or tearing up the summer plants to prep for winter or pruning a tree or picking lemons. Or tinkering with the pool equipment or swapping out a dead light fixture. He works incredibly hard--exercising the work ethic. Ambition and drive? Again, there's the HOA thing, and he works hard to continue to be elected the board president. (This is not your typical HOA. It is a huge organization with many employees a massive budget, and thousands of homes.) And this is just a small bit of how he spends his time. He hasn't shut off his "work ethic, ambition, or drive" at all. And there are so many other like him. You seem to have this view that retirement means sitting on your backside, watching TV, and playing dominoes, and nothing more.
**Being able to afford to do nothing makes you FI, but not RE. If you are regularly working, you aren't Retired. Just because it is no longer a job with a paycheck from The Man, and instead you work for yourself doesn't make it any less a job. You even referred to the possibility of mowing lawns as "gainfully employed", yet that's what you were doing and you say you were FIREd. I think you conflate "not working a traditional job for a traditional employer" and "not working at all". Leaving the traditional workforce to be self-employed or an entrepreneur or a property manager is still being part of the workforce.