my son only likes corn dogs

[GuitarStv]

I've heard the sportscaster Al Michaels say he has not eaten a vegetable since he was 10. He's 71 and still going strong.

Betcha he's got some very uncomfortable poops.

[bogart]

For whatever it's worth ... we are among those who basically serve our son whatever we are eating -- he's now nearly 10, but we've done this since he was big enough to eat solid food, obviously with a few exceptions/safety rules when he was quite small.  The basic rule in our house is some variation of, "You can eat what's for [meal] or you can have [some simple reasonably healthy alternative that's handy -- common options include a PB&J sandwich or a banana]."  He'll eat pretty much anything, pretty much all the time (not quite -- there are moments.  But they are the exception).

I have to admit, I wouldn't have corn dogs in my house -- and my son likes them fine, certainly knows what they are and will ask for them sometimes if we are eating out.  And we are certainly not purists.  We don't happen to eat corn dogs (or hot dogs), pretty much ... ever (except out & about).  But particularly if their over-consumption became an issue (i.e. were I in your shoes), I think I'd just get rid of them (I have done this in our household with granola bars when they started disappearing in vast numbers because, let's be honest, they're basically candy bars dressed up as "healthy.").  And offer other stuff.

That said, it's not obvious whether our son eats everything because of how we approach meals, or whether we're able to approach meals that way because our son eats everything.  So, you know, YMMV and if you really find you're having problems with this issue it seems likely it's worth exploring further -- not really sure what to recommend there personally as I haven't dealt with this.  GL.

[nobody123]

...But particularly if their over-consumption became an issue (i.e. were I in your shoes), I think I'd just get rid of them...

My wife had to forbid me from buying Oreos.  I would get the giant box at Costco assuming they'd last 6 weeks or so, but my kids would sneak them and plow through the whole box in a week.  So, no more Oreos at all in our house.

[bogart]

My wife had to forbid me from buying Oreos.  I would get the giant box at Costco assuming they'd last 6 weeks or so, but my kids would sneak them and plow through the whole box in a week.  So, no more Oreos at all in our house.

Hahaha -- yes, exactly this!  Actually, truth be told we still have a (big) box of granola bars, but I am the only one who knows that, or knows where they are.  Occasionally one appears (granola bar ex machina) in times of stress or crisis. 

[scrubbyfish]

Yep, anything that becomes problematic in our house is left out of our house. Life is simpler that way :)   "Problematic" includes: triggers obsessiveness, bingeing, poor health, crappy habits, etc.

[StarBright]

really struggling trying to get him to eat well. it's only corndogs and crackers for him.

Most of the online stuff says how to make tastier food or just send them to bed without food. I am pretty sure he would refuse to eat, he is already pretty skinny. We are quite capable of cooking very tasty food. I made some sirloin steak this past weekend and he had a few bites but later I tried to reheat it hoping he would eat more but refused.

I wonder if he just wants food with more salt or he needs more sleep or some other behavior issue, he is very stubborn. Wife texts me saying she is using nitrate free hotdogs to make homemade corndogs this morning. So that is where we are. Help!

Just curious - have you tried serving the items in a different format- as in a plain hot dog and piece of cornbread? Sometimes slowly branching out can help. If the cornbread and plain hot dog get eaten you can maybe do a week or two of switching between that and the corndog and then introduce a third item that has a good chance of being eaten, maybe apple sauce? You can slowly build from there.

You could also try making several dips for the crackers as an appetizer - a teaspoon each of hummus, guac, salsa, maybe some sort of chutney on a plate and some crackers to to try them. You might have to dole out the crackers one at a time to keep him from eating only the crackers but "dipping" is something that has worked for our picky kids.

Our family is one that serves a single meal only, but I always keep a seasonal fruit bowl on the dinner table that kids are allowed to pick from instead. There are some nights where they have an apple and water only but I'm okay with that.

I also have a "hidden veggie" cornbread that I serve to my kids: basically grate up a yellow squash or two, a cup of sour cream and an egg in jiffy cornbread and they devour it. This is the only way we eat cornbread now.

[Kitsune]

Just popping in to say 3 things:

1) Seconding the recommendation of Slatter's books, upthread - seriously good advice for MOST kids.

2) If your kid seems like they might have ANY sort of sensory issues at all (or if they're on the Asperger's spectrum, or if they're particularly ritual-oriented) - see, if your kid does not fit the category of 'most' listed in point 1 - seriously consider talking with a psychologist who specializes in food issues for a referral to a nutritionist.

A friend of ours has a kid with asperger's and this kid would ONLY (only, I kid you not) eat plain pancakes made from one specific recipe, OR McDonald's chicken nuggets (not any other brand). And yes, he was willing to have nothing but water for multiple days straight if those options were unavailable, so stubborning him out wouldn't help. Trying to force him to eat things had led to puking. It was bad. Turns out, he had major sensory issues, and the psychologist was able to help the parents introduce other foods one at a time until the kid was able to have a very restricted, but at least nutritionally balanced, diet. (and the over-developed gag reflex was helped by beef jerky sticks that, slowly, got the gag reflex used to different textures being there... silly things, but they made a huge difference in this kid's life).

Basically: for most kids, option1 will totally work. But if ANYTHING about the rest of the description strikes a chord for you, seriously, look for help - sometimes there's a reason behind the stubbornness!

[powersuitrecall]

I just wanted to say thanks for the links and discussion in this thread.

We've been struggling with our 5yo.  Supper had become the subject intense conflict, negotiation and poor behavior.  We were becoming "the food police".  It's a terrible place to be. 

We've already achieved success with some of the methods described here, which we arrived at on our own after much frustration.   I wish we would have read this thread 3 months ago!

[Guses]

I just wanted to say thanks for the links and discussion in this thread.

We've been struggling with our 5yo.  Supper had become the subject intense conflict, negotiation and poor behavior.  We were becoming "the food police".  It's a terrible place to be. 

We've already achieved success with some of the methods described here, which we arrived at on our own after much frustration.   I wish we would have read this thread 3 months ago!

:'( 5 years!

I don't know that I can last another 3 years like that!

[Kitsune]

I just wanted to say thanks for the links and discussion in this thread.

We've been struggling with our 5yo.  Supper had become the subject intense conflict, negotiation and poor behavior.  We were becoming "the food police".  It's a terrible place to be. 

We've already achieved success with some of the methods described here, which we arrived at on our own after much frustration.   I wish we would have read this thread 3 months ago!

:'( 5 years!

I don't know that I can last another 3 years like that!

If it helps at all: what worked for us: serve healthy food, at reasonable intervals (3 meals + 2 snacks), and then just... Don't fuss. Pretend not to notice what actually gets eaten. Frankly, you're likely to lose that fight: they actually control what makes it down their throats, and I'm a big believer in not engaging in power struggles I can lose to a toddler.

Enforce table manners and good behaviour, obv, but... Just let the food go.

We did that with my now-2.5 year old. Most meals, she just eats one thing. Only ham, or only potatoes, or only carrots, or whatever. But at the end of the day, after 2 snacks, 3 meals, and some milk? She's got a really good balanced diet going, AND we've all had pleasant meal times, AND she enjoys the process of food and eating. End result: 100% win.

Of course, if she was eating ONLY bread for every meal, we'd have to switch tactics. But as it is... It's a pretty ok method so far. And sometimes she even has some of everything on her plate. ;)

[FrugalShrew]

While I'm not exactly sure how gut bacteria will control the taste and enjoyment of food at the table, I'll bite.  What exactly does one do to cause good gut bacteria to be generated?

Well, I don't mean for anyone to "bite" (no pun intended! woohoo!). It's super Googleable (e.g., gut bacteria picky eating; change gut bacteria; etc), and I don't want to divert this thread into a bacterial one. I just wanted to mention this track for people interested in checking that out, along with whatever other ideas mentioned that suit any given family.

As you note, it's not about controlling the objective characteristics of foods, because one's gut bacteria doesn't influence that. Rather, it's about how one's senses are controlled by one's gut bacteria. I find it crazy interesting. My kid was a very extreme example, and the change was stunning. I've seen the same in many others.

Wow, this gut bacteria stuff is quite interesting! I especially liked this article: http://www.healthhomeandhappiness.com/gut-flora-picky-eating.html

[powersuitrecall]

I just wanted to say thanks for the links and discussion in this thread.

We've been struggling with our 5yo.  Supper had become the subject intense conflict, negotiation and poor behavior.  We were becoming "the food police".  It's a terrible place to be. 

We've already achieved success with some of the methods described here, which we arrived at on our own after much frustration.   I wish we would have read this thread 3 months ago!

:'( 5 years!

I don't know that I can last another 3 years like that!

Don't worry.  Despite the fact that it feels like an eternity when you are going through it, you will look back and remark how quickly it all went :)

[marion10]

How old is your son? I see some references to adoption-has he been in an institution before you got him? Most kids don't like steak anyway too hard to chew. I second Ellen Satter's books- great resource.

[hoping2retire35]

How old is your son? I see some references to adoption-has he been in an institution before you got him? Most kids don't like steak anyway too hard to chew. I second Ellen Satter's books- great resource.

No, someone mentioned a book about behavior and eating habits with adopted kids. Couldn't find that one but found some on adoption behavioral issues. Thought could help. Would be open to adopting in the future though.

Still reading through materials. It wasnt so much about corn dogs per se, just his picky eating. When he started liking corn dogs I was pretty happy Bc he was finally getting protein....but then it was only corn dogs. I made a bunch of ww pancakes w coconut oil (scratch not a mix) and that is what he is on to now. I guess the are  Healthyish, still trying.

[galliver]

It almost seems harder for those who have already made an issue of food. My mom followed Slatter-like methods as long as I can remember with all three of us: one meal for lunch and dinner (with a bare handful of exceptions for when one or more of us really, really hated something), apples/fruit or vegetables as snacks whenever we wanted, no fuss or force feeding.  We all went through a time when given the choice, we'd take pasta and cheese, hot dogs, pizza, bread, potatoes, etc but during the same time, we were perfectly good with and rather enjoyed tomatoes, cucumbers, bell peppers, broccoli, peas, carrots, citrus, basically all berries, and watermelon, probably among other things. It didn't seem to really occur to me or my sisters to refuse to eat to get a diet of straight pizza; one dinner was just how things WERE. But I think if a kid has already seen victory, it might become exponentially harder, because they know the current system isn't the only way things could be.

Keep fighting the good fight! I think in your shoes I might plan a menu with corn dogs every 2-3 days (to assuage your worries that he eat sometimes, and also show that everyone can have their favorite food sometimes), but I'd only let him have 1. And it's not frugal, but I'd temporarily buy the small packages, then if he wants seconds, "sorry, there's no more!" or "those are for Thursday!" depending on the pkg size. But not like there are 30 more there for an indeterminate "later". And of course, serve with a side of vegetable.

Sent from my SM-G900V using Tapatalk

[TerriM]

We had a very picky eater.  He was a supertaster, so fruits and veggies often have very strong flavors to him. 

People say that you can't starve a kid, but you can.  My son ended up at 5th percentile due to a combination of pickiness and a medical issue that made him less hungry.  When I finally realized how far he'd dropped, I decided it was better to give him what he wanted--even if it was pizza and ice cream every day--than to fight a pickiness battle.  Now he's a healthy 50-60%ile and eats much better, but it's taken a lot of time.  I try to let him make decisions about what to eat, but he has to try a small bite of things I want him to try.  It has been tremendously frustrating to have to cook different meals for him, but we're finally past it.

Regarding the gut bacteria issue--you will have a hard time rebuilding gut bacteria if you are eating a lot of non-organic wheat, corn, and soy.  These crops are generally treated with glyphosate which kills gut bacteria.   Wheat may be doused with glyphosate before harvesting (Monsanto actually recommends it--it dries out the wheat faster, so you can have an earlier harvest and not have to worry about a freeze destroying the crop).  I don't know what's in the corndogs, but if you can go organic, or cut out wheat altogether, you'll have an easier time rebuilding the gut bacteria.  Also, some people have intestinal damage even if they don't have celiac markers.

Good luck!

[GuitarStv]

Regarding the gut bacteria issue--you will have a hard time rebuilding gut bacteria if you are eating a lot of non-organic wheat, corn, and soy.  These crops are generally treated with glyphosate which kills gut bacteria.   Wheat may be doused with glyphosate before harvesting (Monsanto actually recommends it--it dries out the wheat faster, so you can have an earlier harvest and not have to worry about a freeze destroying the crop).

I'm not sure where you're getting your information from, but glyphosate residue levels are tightly controlled by the EPA:  http://www.ecfr.gov/cgi-bin/text-idx?SID=2c85909360c7c5aff63ddd1447545d6a&mc=true&node=se40.24.180_1364&rgn=div8.  The type of dousing that you're describing must be very minuscule indeed if the crop is to remain salable.

It's possible that glyphosate could have an effect on gut bacteria, but there's little to no credible evidence that this is the case so far.  I'd encourage you to read a reasonably balanced article about the matter here:  https://thoughtscapism.com/2016/09/08/4-does-glyphosate-harm-gut-bacteria/.

[soccerluvof4]

I have 4 kids and all 4 have there opinions thats for sure. I feel bad for my DW she is an excellent cook and tries to cook very healthy and hit all there taste buds but thats impossible. When I was young it was eat everything on your plate or dont leave the table. Now its whats for dinner before we sit down at the table. It became such a battle we just focused on table manners. They all are very good at that , eat with there mouth closed and say thank you regardless BUT its still frustrating. We are not going to give up what there needs are just to plz them. We have food stashes for Lunches or they would just eat that stuff. We do keep pizzas and stuff like that in the house they can make whenever they want but what can you do. So we just keep doing what were doing as some are worse than others. The oldest and youngest are by far the worst. They get hungry enough.....they eat!

[gerardc]

I don't have kids but what's wrong with the "serve something and he either eats or starves" approach? Aren't you sick of all those entitled brats and their overprotective parents?

[GuitarStv]

I don't have kids but what's wrong with the "serve something and he either eats or starves" approach? Aren't you sick of all those entitled brats and their overprotective parents?

While my general approach is to do what you've listed, if there's anything that I've learned raising our son . . . it's that every kid is completely different.  Things that work well for some (maybe even most) kids don't work at all for others.  This seems to apply to sleeping, eating, toilet training, reading, etc.

[powersuitrecall]

I just wanted to say thanks for the links and discussion in this thread.

We've been struggling with our 5yo.  Supper had become the subject intense conflict, negotiation and poor behavior.  We were becoming "the food police".  It's a terrible place to be. 

We've already achieved success with some of the methods described here, which we arrived at on our own after much frustration.   I wish we would have read this thread 3 months ago!

Here's an update on our 5yo picky eater, and what's been working for us.  Here's a typical day ...

Breakfast - Oats, bananas & peanut butter (he loves all of these things so not an issue)
Lunch - A balanced packed lunch (senior kindergarten): slice of home made bread, hummus, cheese, apple, cucumbers
After School Snack - Must finish leftovers from lunch* + crackers/cheese/apple, etc.
Supper - A balanced family meal but he gets to eat whatever parts he wants, in whatever quantities he desires.
Dessert - none

* We are flexible on this, but he understands that it's pretty much a hard rule.  I'm hoping to drop this in the future.

In contrast, our 3 year old will eat anything we put in front of her.  She seems to have the metabolism equivalent of a jet engine.  There are days where she will consume 3x as much as our son for supper.  It's comical to watch.

[Kitsune]

I don't have kids but what's wrong with the "serve something and he either eats or starves" approach? Aren't you sick of all those entitled brats and their overprotective parents?

a) You'll notice, if you read this thread, that more than 3/4 of the advice given falls along the line of 'put food in front of them, different foods at different meals, and then leave it alone, they'll eat something at each meal and eventally eat more things, it's not worth the fight and the fight will consume you and no one will enjoy it and it'll suck and not go anywhere, but definitely don't make separate meals because that's the road to never stopping again". Resources linked to, books recomended, etc - that's basically the advice. So... a nicer version of what you just said, no?

b) pro tip: coming into a forum saying "I have no experience with this and am ignorant, but from my vast platform of knowledge, I declare that the people you care about are entitled brats and also you suck at taking care of them and I'm totally judging" (paraphrasing, but that's what it comes off as) is not... let's say... likely to lead to a productive discussion, or to anyone agreeing with you and changing their way of thinking. What exactly were you trying to accomplish with that statement?

[gerardc]

a) You'll notice, if you read this thread, that more than 3/4 of the advice given falls along the line of 'put food in front of them, different foods at different meals, and then leave it alone, they'll eat something at each meal and eventally eat more things, it's not worth the fight and the fight will consume you and no one will enjoy it and it'll suck and not go anywhere, but definitely don't make separate meals because that's the road to never stopping again". Resources linked to, books recomended, etc - that's basically the advice. So... a nicer version of what you just said, no?

b) pro tip: coming into a forum saying "I have no experience with this and am ignorant, but from my vast platform of knowledge, I declare that the people you care about are entitled brats and also you suck at taking care of them and I'm totally judging" (paraphrasing, but that's what it comes off as) is not... let's say... likely to lead to a productive discussion, or to anyone agreeing with you and changing their way of thinking. What exactly were you trying to accomplish with that statement?

a) Yes but that's common sense, you don't need resources, let alone books, to act this way... That's just overthinking child psychology IMO.

b) I was genuinely curious if I was maybe missing something, because that strategy seemed obvious to me, so my intent was to gather the knowledge of more experienced people. Apparently I wasn't missing much!