Wills and Advanced Health Directives. Where did you do yours?

[coffeelover]

I've filled out my AHD and just need to get witnesses and then turn it in to docs office.

I've been trying to find a cheap, cheap, cheap place to set up a will in case of death on my part. Online.

I'm married, sahm, young children, stepchildren and also my own bio child 19 just moved out not long ago.


I'm having my 9th surgery in less then a month and I'm scared.(this includes 3 c-sections) I feel my age is getting there, high 30's so time to do this will thing.

Any recommendations. Cannot afford to go to a lawyer, thats not even an option in our budget.
Still trying to build our emergency fund, and then in the next few weeks have to start paying off my stinking hospital/doc bills again.

I do have life insurance. Its a decent policy thru husbands work. Enough to even pay off our house.

 My husband would get ss death benefits for our young kids. He has agreed (begrudgingly) that if were to ever pass that a nanny would be hired full time for our household. I'm actually really serious about this. There is no way my husband could manage all our kids, and his work, -plus he travels occasionally- on his own.
One of our young kids is high needs, has sensory processing disorder and other delays. Although she has improved greatly, thankfully due to our OT lady.

So tell me, what is your situation and how did you handle it?

[RetiredAt63]

Being a SAHM means you are contributing a huge amount to your family, with all your at-home work supporting your family's lives.  Society still undervalues this, and the default is to not have a will and not have life and disability insurance if you are not bringing in an income.  But your loss would be a huge financial as well as emotional hit for your family.  Plan for it.

So 3 things to look after:
First, lawyers tend not to charge a lot for wills, and often do a 2 for 1 deal - i.e. your husband needs a will, power of attorney, etc. as well. Does he have one?  He may not be facing surgery, but he could get hit by a truck on the way home from work tomorrow.   A family law specialist will know the laws where you live, and will ask all the important what-if questions you probably haven't thought of.  Not doing this would be penny-wise, pound foolish, IMO.  Plus even if your husband is the beneficiary for your life insurance and you have no other assets, you both need wills in case you die together in an accident. What would happen to the children and the estate then?

Second - do you have disability insurance?  From the description of what you do, you (your family) need it.  If you were totally disabled, your husband would need the income to hire someone to do what you do now.  Since he has decent coverage at work and has the life insurance for you, can he get you covered for disability as well?

Third - since you have life insurance, then your husband has the resources to hire help if you are gone.  However, if you think he would not do things the way you would want them done, then you can always have someone else be the executor or co-executor of your will, so that the money is spent the way you want.  Again a good family lawyer can help you sort this out.  This may also mean changing the beneficiary of the insurance from your spouse to your estate (or whatever the lawyer advises for your area).

I'm not a lawyer, none in the family, but after reading the inheritance drama thread over on the anti-mustachian forum I am even more strongly in favour of clear, well-thought-out wills.

[Philip Marlowe]

I started with a holographic (hand written) will.  If they're written in your own hand writing, dated, and signed, they're considered valid as a last will.  That varies State by State, but you could start there for a free will.

[coffeelover]

Check and see if your state has implemented the POLST form (Physicians Orders for Life Sustaining Treatment). 

http://www.polst.org/

The website focuses on the end of life aspect, but anyone can fill one out as long as it is recognized in your state.  It is actually actionable instructions for medical personnel -- who often will not act on an advanced directive due to liability concerns.

This website also provides a lot of good advice and guidance -- it was created by a young mom whose husband was tragically killed in a biking accident in Seattle a few years ago.

http://www.gyst.com/

I'll check it out, thanks!

[coffeelover]

I started with a holographic (hand written) will.  If they're written in your own hand writing, dated, and signed, they're considered valid as a last will.  That varies State by State, but you could start there for a free will.

Gawd I hate writing stuff out, to much computer in me now.
But yes this is a good idea. My handwriting is horrible though, sigh. I'll look into this further as well.