If you'd bought the house for 90K (or 75K), and somehow borrowed money such that you're total debt was 95K, would it change what you do? If so, you're not thinking about it rationally. (I suspect your SO is falling into this trap. If the house *never* recovered in value, would that mean you'd live in it permanently, until you both died, all over maybe a 20K loss?)
When a house isn't selling, it's for one reason only: the price is too high. It's not because the garden isn't right, because the street is too busy, because the appliances are too dated, or anything else. All of those inform the right price, but it's still a price issue. If you want to move, knock the price down a bit, maybe even to 99.5K (to get it into the "search window" of a new category of shoppers) and get it done and behind you. Depending on your market (real estate is famously local), you might have luck with 99.5K listing and a deadline for offers. Around here, houses are selling for way over ask, the Tuesday after the open house weekend, but that's all very cyclical (and local, of course).
All of that assumes that moving is the right plan for your family. Figure that out first, and then figure out how to get it to happen.
If you want to be a landlord, do that. If you find yourself pushed into being a landlord because the house isn't selling for an extra 6K (105 vs 99), I think you're crazy to take on the burdens and hassles of landlording over 6K. (If you want to do it and it makes financial sense, it's a perfectly fine idea. If 6K is holding you hostage to force you into it, that's when crazytown starts.)
If you lost money on housing, so be it. What's done is done. You needed a place to live anyway. In 8 years, you may have lost 40K. That's 5K/year, or about 415/month. Would rent have cost you that much in your area? (I have no idea, but it seems likely.) Don't think of it as "losing 40K". Think instead that you spent 40K on housing, just like a most other people did...
Edit: you have to include interest paid (the big one, net of tax savings), property taxes, and the difference in insurance to the above math. That will change the math a lot, but still might be compared to slightly overpaying rent for the time in exchange for having more control over housing and moving fewer times (big hidden time and money suck)