Author Topic: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?  (Read 85379 times)

Chranstronaut

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What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« on: March 19, 2019, 11:24:42 AM »
Lots of people post here about the noble reasons they are stashing for FIRE.  Maybe you want to spend more time traveling, enjoy time with your family or focus on the volunteer work that is most meaningful for you.

These are great things to be motivated by.

But I want to know: what is your most petty or selfish reason for growing your stash?

Chranstronaut

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2019, 11:25:44 AM »
I'll start:
I want to buy my freedom so I never have to listen to my coworker eat carrots with his mouth open in the cube next to me.

Cool Friend

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #2 on: March 19, 2019, 11:38:31 AM »
My most petty reason is my number one reason: I want everyone to leave me alone.

never give up

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #3 on: March 19, 2019, 11:40:48 AM »
I can't stand the annual corporate performance review or buying new socks for work.

pbkmaine

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #4 on: March 19, 2019, 11:45:42 AM »
Meetings. I hated the endless meetings.

Old Ball Coach

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #5 on: March 19, 2019, 11:46:53 AM »
I would like to FIRE so I can quit teaching. It's not the kids. It's the parents. Seriously.

madgeylou

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #6 on: March 19, 2019, 11:47:02 AM »
Having the same conversation half a dozen times in the same month.

Jtrey17

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #7 on: March 19, 2019, 11:47:20 AM »
I want to quit work before it affects my appearance too much - wrinkles, extra pounds, gray hair.

rantk81

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #8 on: March 19, 2019, 11:51:27 AM »
because Aint Nobody Got Time For This Bullshit.

Adventine

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #9 on: March 19, 2019, 11:52:52 AM »
To give my cats a better life ;)

NorthernMonkey

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #10 on: March 19, 2019, 12:01:45 PM »
Meetings. I hated the endless meetings.

This x 1000. I'm never ever going to go on a Skype conference call ever once I FIRE

Valvore

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #11 on: March 19, 2019, 12:13:52 PM »
So I don't have to sit in traffic anymore.

Once I FIRE I can travel using at my leisure, maybe take public transportation or bike. And I can avoid rush hour because I don't have to actually be anywhere. :) My commute isn't terrible but I hate the waste time in the car when I could be somewhere else doing something else that is actually productive.

FIRE@50

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #12 on: March 19, 2019, 12:19:51 PM »
I don't want to go to work

Wallet

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #13 on: March 19, 2019, 12:23:23 PM »
I want to FIRE so I never have to engage in scripted conversations with coworkers again.

"Big plans for the weekend?" "The weather is so [insert platitude here]! Can't wait for [next season]!" "How is it only Tuesday? Feels like it's been a full week already!" "TGIF!".

Urg. I hate that this is essentially performance art. Nobody is listening to the answers - it's automatic responses once the speech machinery has been set in motion.

Chranstronaut

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #14 on: March 19, 2019, 12:38:34 PM »
So I don't have to sit in traffic anymore.

Once I FIRE I can travel using at my leisure, maybe take public transportation or bike. And I can avoid rush hour because I don't have to actually be anywhere. :) My commute isn't terrible but I hate the waste time in the car when I could be somewhere else doing something else that is actually productive.

This is also at the top of my list.  I remember the day in 2014 I got stuck on the freeway behind a huge accident for 3 hours, and it will always fuel my hatred of commuting.  I now commute 20 minutes and it's still too long.

wageslave23

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #15 on: March 19, 2019, 12:41:18 PM »
All of the above.  Minus the cats - I don't have any cats, but might get a dog once I'm not gone for 10+ hrs a day.

TexasRunner

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #16 on: March 19, 2019, 12:49:06 PM »
So I don't have to answer the SAME. DAMN. QUESTION. multiple times from the same coworkers....  Literally happened while reading this thread.

I told you this yesterday, don't ask me the exact same thing again today.

turketron

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #17 on: March 19, 2019, 12:56:20 PM »
So I never have to hear anyone say they're gonna "shoot you an email" ever again. Other honorable mentions: "touch base," roadmap, "on my radar," "ping," etc.

Askel

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #18 on: March 19, 2019, 01:01:01 PM »
See my signature.

Telecaster

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #19 on: March 19, 2019, 01:01:41 PM »
I don't sleep as well when I have to get up and go do something at a specific time.   

Hula Hoop

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #20 on: March 19, 2019, 01:16:50 PM »
I want to be able to dress like teenage me again.  Doc Martens, black nail polish and dye my hair any color I want.  Might look a bit silly on a 40 something but I just want to have the freedom not to have to dress in a "professional" manner. 

I also love sleeping in and want to do that a whole lot.  And also want to avoid the small talk with coworkers, performance reviews and having to be nice to my boss.

This is kind of sappy but I'd also like to spend the majority of my day with the people I love ie. my husband and kids - rather than with my coworkers.
« Last Edit: March 19, 2019, 01:21:15 PM by Hula Hoop »

Mississippi Mudstache

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #21 on: March 19, 2019, 01:19:26 PM »
I want to go hiking on a Wednesday because the weather is gorgeous. I want to take a month-long road trip out West and not be made to feel guilty. I want to work in my woodshop during the daylight hours. Are those reasons petty? I really don't think so. Honestly, I don't think I have any petty reasons for wanting to FIRE. I just want to reclaim my humanity.

LennStar

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #22 on: March 19, 2019, 01:22:11 PM »
I don't want to have to Small Talk to people, being a strong introvert.

Not that this is a petty reason for me, mind you.

turketron

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #23 on: March 19, 2019, 01:23:13 PM »
"On a go-forward basis." That's some pro-level, adding syllables for the sake of being fancy, bullshit.

oh boy I've never heard that one before, thank god. "Going forward..." sure, but not that.


turketron

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #24 on: March 19, 2019, 01:25:31 PM »
I'm 4 weeks into a 6 week sabbatical from work, which has been great but has also just been a tease of what FIRE will (hopefully?) be like. Being able to go grocery shopping at 10am on a Tuesday is glorious.

Sailor Sam

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #25 on: March 19, 2019, 01:31:34 PM »
I don't want to be in charge of reminding anyone to call their mother on Mother's Day. My mum is dead, you assholes.

kei te pai

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #26 on: March 19, 2019, 01:32:16 PM »
I am FIRED. I generally dont know what the date is, and quite often dont even know what day of the week it is.and I like it this way.

damnedbee

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #27 on: March 19, 2019, 01:35:00 PM »
 Never again having to hear "Hi, who just joined?" on a conference call.

sol

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #28 on: March 19, 2019, 01:43:49 PM »
They had this stupid "no alcohol in the office" rule.

Chranstronaut

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #29 on: March 19, 2019, 02:12:38 PM »

LifeHappens

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #30 on: March 19, 2019, 02:24:23 PM »
I'm a contractor and have to send 3 invoices every month. I HATE IT!!! Takes maybe 15 minutes, but I still hate it.

dcheesi

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #31 on: March 19, 2019, 02:39:41 PM »
I want to FIRE so I never have to engage in scripted conversations with coworkers again.

"Big plans for the weekend?" "The weather is so [insert platitude here]! Can't wait for [next season]!" "How is it only Tuesday? Feels like it's been a full week already!" "TGIF!".

Urg. I hate that this is essentially performance art. Nobody is listening to the answers - it's automatic responses once the speech machinery has been set in motion.
"Sounds like somebody's having a case of the 'Mondays' "

Spitfire

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #32 on: March 19, 2019, 03:17:16 PM »
I really don't like dressing in work clothes. Anything more than shorts and a tee shirt is too much for me.

Andrew9141

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #33 on: March 19, 2019, 03:29:37 PM »
So I can brag about it. (At the right moment) :)

peeps_be_peeping

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #34 on: March 19, 2019, 03:33:40 PM »
So I never have to hear anyone say they're gonna "shoot you an email" ever again. Other honorable mentions: "touch base," roadmap, "on my radar," "ping," etc.

"On a go-forward basis." That's some pro-level, adding syllables for the sake of being fancy, bullshit.

"Shooting you an email to circle back and touch base on our roadmap for going forward with the items on our radar in the [insert topic here] space."

DeepEllumStache

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #35 on: March 19, 2019, 03:36:23 PM »
The gym and grocery store are a lot less busy during work hours.

simmias

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #36 on: March 19, 2019, 03:42:35 PM »
I have to manage our company's social media accounts as part of my job.  I can't wait to delete those fuckers off every device I own.  Maybe I'll keep Facebook and Instagram.  Maybe.  But I know I'm deleting hundreds of people that first day.

Luck12

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #37 on: March 19, 2019, 04:14:07 PM »
Workplace bathrooms. 

dougules

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #38 on: March 19, 2019, 04:23:28 PM »
Waking up early.   I've realized this is may actually be my #1 reason for FIRE.  I sometimes think my life would be completely different if I could sleep until 9 whenever I felt the need. 

+1 on work clothes.  That just sticks out disproportionately to me for some reason. 

To give my cats a better life ;)

This is neither petty nor selfish!

No it's not at all petty or selfish.

With our old cat who passed away a couple years ago, I felt sorry that she would never live to see us retired.  I feel sorry that our young cat will be middle-aged before he gets to go outside on weekdays.  Then it always takes me a second to think about the fact that I will be middle-aged before I get to go outside on weekdays, too.

P.S. It looks like this thread got popular quick. 

Milizard

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #39 on: March 19, 2019, 04:45:22 PM »
So I don't have to pretend to like things I don't really like.

simmias

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #40 on: March 19, 2019, 04:49:58 PM »
Workplace bathrooms.
That's one of the things I'll miss!  "Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime..."

Retireatee1

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #41 on: March 19, 2019, 05:01:28 PM »
I don't want to have any clue what day of the week it is.

gaja

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #42 on: March 19, 2019, 05:13:54 PM »
Once a year we have a two day department retreat/meeting. This year I was a few minutes away from a full blown panic attack after the first five hours inside a small overfilled meeting room discussing stuff that is irrelevant and boring.

Prairie Gal

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #43 on: March 19, 2019, 05:18:43 PM »
Afternoon naps if I feel like it.

sol

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #44 on: March 19, 2019, 05:24:26 PM »
I really don't like dressing in work clothes. Anything more than shorts and a tee shirt is too much for me.

Can confirm.  Dressing like a broke college kid every day is pretty great.

A lot of the other stuff, though, is not what everyone seems to think it will be.  I still know what day of the week it is, because I still have kids in school and I'm still involved in a variety of community activities.  I also don't sleep in very often, for the exact same reasons.  Grocery shopping at 9am this morning was pretty sweet, that part is totally true.  Also, Sunday evenings are not stress-inducing anymore because I have nothing to dread.

But my retirement is not the lazy life of leisure some people imagine it will be.  At least for me, there has been a very limited amount of napping and sleeping late.  I don't watch television.  I don't go fishing, or drink beer all day, or go days and days without engaging with society.  I'm still doing stuff, it's just not stuff I have to do from the inside of a cubicle.  On the bright side, it's stuff I want to do and not stuff I have to do, so I don't really mind being busy.

Early retirement doesn't absolve you of all responsibility, the way a bunch of people in this thread seem to think it will.  If anything, it makes you more responsible, not less, because it forces you to identify what you're going to do with your time and your life instead of just blindly following orders day in and day out.  You have to decide what you're going to do and then you have to do it, because you said you would, and it reflects poorly on you as a person to not do so.  In some ways, being a corporate drone is easier.  Just show up every day and do what they tell you, and take home money.  There is no existential crisis, no search for meaning or purpose, there is only the inevitable suffering of servitude.  There is security and predictability in that.
« Last Edit: March 20, 2019, 12:14:50 AM by sol »

Kay-Ell

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #45 on: March 19, 2019, 05:39:19 PM »
Iíve been semi-fired for about a year and a half and this thread is bringing back terrible memories.

Meetings! Urgh. The startup I worked for was acquired my a meeting heavy company that changed our whole culture. Took 6 meetings with 4 different teams of people to come up with a plan to get budget approval to tie my own damn shoes.

Being around people all day as an introvert! As well as NOT being around animals all day.

Having to live my life around a prescribed schedule of when to wake up, when to eat, when to be productive, when to fuck around online pretending to be productive. Which days to dread, which ones to look forward to.  And then on my two days of freedom each week, feeling like I was wasting half of them just lying around recoperating while I tried to do some laundry and grocery shopping, without any motivation to actually do the things I wanted to do with my life.

WSUCoug1994

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #46 on: March 19, 2019, 05:50:19 PM »
Weekly update calls with my clients - these stress inducing calls that happen every week during the duration of my projects x 15 clients at a time.  I love my clients (well most of them) BUT I AINT GONNA MISS 'EM.

hoodedfalcon

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #47 on: March 19, 2019, 05:58:48 PM »
I want to stop pretending to give a fuck.

Prairie Gal

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #48 on: March 19, 2019, 06:02:15 PM »
I want to stop pretending to give a fuck.

Ha ha! THIS!

Also the clothes one. Having to get up at a certain time, shower, do my hair, put together an office appropriate outfit. I'm over it.

LifePhaseTwo

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Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
« Reply #49 on: March 19, 2019, 06:09:21 PM »
I want to stop pretending to give a fuck.

Exactly - this was sapping my energy. Every. Damn. Day.
I FIREíd 4 months ago and itís freaking amazing!!! I sleep well, sleep in every day, wear what I want, care about things that are important to me, spend time with my awesome grandkids, read books, exercise and take better care of myself, eat better, relax more and do whatever the heck I like!