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General Discussion => Welcome and General Discussion => Topic started by: Chranstronaut on March 19, 2019, 11:24:42 AM

Title: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 19, 2019, 11:24:42 AM
Lots of people post here about the noble reasons they are stashing for FIRE.  Maybe you want to spend more time traveling, enjoy time with your family or focus on the volunteer work that is most meaningful for you.

These are great things to be motivated by.

But I want to know: what is your most petty or selfish reason for growing your stash?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 19, 2019, 11:25:44 AM
I'll start:
I want to buy my freedom so I never have to listen to my coworker eat carrots with his mouth open in the cube next to me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Cool Friend on March 19, 2019, 11:38:31 AM
My most petty reason is my number one reason: I want everyone to leave me alone.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: never give up on March 19, 2019, 11:40:48 AM
I can't stand the annual corporate performance review or buying new socks for work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: pbkmaine on March 19, 2019, 11:45:42 AM
Meetings. I hated the endless meetings.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Old Ball Coach on March 19, 2019, 11:46:53 AM
I would like to FIRE so I can quit teaching. It's not the kids. It's the parents. Seriously.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: madgeylou on March 19, 2019, 11:47:02 AM
Having the same conversation half a dozen times in the same month.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Jtrey17 on March 19, 2019, 11:47:20 AM
I want to quit work before it affects my appearance too much - wrinkles, extra pounds, gray hair.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on March 19, 2019, 11:51:27 AM
because Aint Nobody Got Time For This Bullshit.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Adventine on March 19, 2019, 11:52:52 AM
To give my cats a better life ;)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: NorthernMonkey on March 19, 2019, 12:01:45 PM
Meetings. I hated the endless meetings.

This x 1000. I'm never ever going to go on a Skype conference call ever once I FIRE
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Valvore on March 19, 2019, 12:13:52 PM
So I don't have to sit in traffic anymore.

Once I FIRE I can travel using at my leisure, maybe take public transportation or bike. And I can avoid rush hour because I don't have to actually be anywhere. :) My commute isn't terrible but I hate the waste time in the car when I could be somewhere else doing something else that is actually productive.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FIRE@50 on March 19, 2019, 12:19:51 PM
I don't want to go to work
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Wallet on March 19, 2019, 12:23:23 PM
I want to FIRE so I never have to engage in scripted conversations with coworkers again.

"Big plans for the weekend?" "The weather is so [insert platitude here]! Can't wait for [next season]!" "How is it only Tuesday? Feels like it's been a full week already!" "TGIF!".

Urg. I hate that this is essentially performance art. Nobody is listening to the answers - it's automatic responses once the speech machinery has been set in motion.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 19, 2019, 12:38:34 PM
So I don't have to sit in traffic anymore.

Once I FIRE I can travel using at my leisure, maybe take public transportation or bike. And I can avoid rush hour because I don't have to actually be anywhere. :) My commute isn't terrible but I hate the waste time in the car when I could be somewhere else doing something else that is actually productive.

This is also at the top of my list.  I remember the day in 2014 I got stuck on the freeway behind a huge accident for 3 hours, and it will always fuel my hatred of commuting.  I now commute 20 minutes and it's still too long.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: wageslave23 on March 19, 2019, 12:41:18 PM
All of the above.  Minus the cats - I don't have any cats, but might get a dog once I'm not gone for 10+ hrs a day.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: TexasRunner on March 19, 2019, 12:49:06 PM
So I don't have to answer the SAME. DAMN. QUESTION. multiple times from the same coworkers....  Literally happened while reading this thread.

I told you this yesterday, don't ask me the exact same thing again today.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: turketron on March 19, 2019, 12:56:20 PM
So I never have to hear anyone say they're gonna "shoot you an email" ever again. Other honorable mentions: "touch base," roadmap, "on my radar," "ping," etc.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Askel on March 19, 2019, 01:01:01 PM
See my signature.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Telecaster on March 19, 2019, 01:01:41 PM
I don't sleep as well when I have to get up and go do something at a specific time.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Hula Hoop on March 19, 2019, 01:16:50 PM
I want to be able to dress like teenage me again.  Doc Martens, black nail polish and dye my hair any color I want.  Might look a bit silly on a 40 something but I just want to have the freedom not to have to dress in a "professional" manner. 

I also love sleeping in and want to do that a whole lot.  And also want to avoid the small talk with coworkers, performance reviews and having to be nice to my boss.

This is kind of sappy but I'd also like to spend the majority of my day with the people I love ie. my husband and kids - rather than with my coworkers.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 19, 2019, 01:19:26 PM
I want to go hiking on a Wednesday because the weather is gorgeous. I want to take a month-long road trip out West and not be made to feel guilty. I want to work in my woodshop during the daylight hours. Are those reasons petty? I really don't think so. Honestly, I don't think I have any petty reasons for wanting to FIRE. I just want to reclaim my humanity.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on March 19, 2019, 01:22:11 PM
I don't want to have to Small Talk to people, being a strong introvert.

Not that this is a petty reason for me, mind you.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: turketron on March 19, 2019, 01:23:13 PM
"On a go-forward basis." That's some pro-level, adding syllables for the sake of being fancy, bullshit.

oh boy I've never heard that one before, thank god. "Going forward..." sure, but not that.

(http://www.quickmeme.com/img/66/66cc86c8bcaecb90038f06b18aa065423649d7ddf3eb81272f04af7f308d3351.jpg)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: turketron on March 19, 2019, 01:25:31 PM
I'm 4 weeks into a 6 week sabbatical from work, which has been great but has also just been a tease of what FIRE will (hopefully?) be like. Being able to go grocery shopping at 10am on a Tuesday is glorious.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Sailor Sam on March 19, 2019, 01:31:34 PM
I don't want to be in charge of reminding anyone to call their mother on Mother's Day. My mum is dead, you assholes.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: kei te pai on March 19, 2019, 01:32:16 PM
I am FIRED. I generally dont know what the date is, and quite often dont even know what day of the week it is.and I like it this way.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: damnedbee on March 19, 2019, 01:35:00 PM
 Never again having to hear "Hi, who just joined?" on a conference call.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on March 19, 2019, 01:43:49 PM
They had this stupid "no alcohol in the office" rule.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 19, 2019, 02:12:38 PM
I just want to reclaim my humanity.

Damn.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LifeHappens on March 19, 2019, 02:24:23 PM
I'm a contractor and have to send 3 invoices every month. I HATE IT!!! Takes maybe 15 minutes, but I still hate it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dcheesi on March 19, 2019, 02:39:41 PM
I want to FIRE so I never have to engage in scripted conversations with coworkers again.

"Big plans for the weekend?" "The weather is so [insert platitude here]! Can't wait for [next season]!" "How is it only Tuesday? Feels like it's been a full week already!" "TGIF!".

Urg. I hate that this is essentially performance art. Nobody is listening to the answers - it's automatic responses once the speech machinery has been set in motion.
"Sounds like somebody's having a case of the 'Mondays' "
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Spitfire on March 19, 2019, 03:17:16 PM
I really don't like dressing in work clothes. Anything more than shorts and a tee shirt is too much for me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Andrew9141 on March 19, 2019, 03:29:37 PM
So I can brag about it. (At the right moment) :)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: peeps_be_peeping on March 19, 2019, 03:33:40 PM
So I never have to hear anyone say they're gonna "shoot you an email" ever again. Other honorable mentions: "touch base," roadmap, "on my radar," "ping," etc.

"On a go-forward basis." That's some pro-level, adding syllables for the sake of being fancy, bullshit.

"Shooting you an email to circle back and touch base on our roadmap for going forward with the items on our radar in the [insert topic here] space."
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DeepEllumStache on March 19, 2019, 03:36:23 PM
The gym and grocery store are a lot less busy during work hours.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: simmias on March 19, 2019, 03:42:35 PM
I have to manage our company's social media accounts as part of my job.  I can't wait to delete those fuckers off every device I own.  Maybe I'll keep Facebook and Instagram.  Maybe.  But I know I'm deleting hundreds of people that first day.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Luck12 on March 19, 2019, 04:14:07 PM
Workplace bathrooms. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on March 19, 2019, 04:23:28 PM
Waking up early.   I've realized this is may actually be my #1 reason for FIRE.  I sometimes think my life would be completely different if I could sleep until 9 whenever I felt the need. 

+1 on work clothes.  That just sticks out disproportionately to me for some reason. 

To give my cats a better life ;)

This is neither petty nor selfish!

No it's not at all petty or selfish.

With our old cat who passed away a couple years ago, I felt sorry that she would never live to see us retired.  I feel sorry that our young cat will be middle-aged before he gets to go outside on weekdays.  Then it always takes me a second to think about the fact that I will be middle-aged before I get to go outside on weekdays, too.

P.S. It looks like this thread got popular quick. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Milizard on March 19, 2019, 04:45:22 PM
So I don't have to pretend to like things I don't really like.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: simmias on March 19, 2019, 04:49:58 PM
Workplace bathrooms.
That's one of the things I'll miss!  "Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime..."
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Retireatee1 on March 19, 2019, 05:01:28 PM
I don't want to have any clue what day of the week it is.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: gaja on March 19, 2019, 05:13:54 PM
Once a year we have a two day department retreat/meeting. This year I was a few minutes away from a full blown panic attack after the first five hours inside a small overfilled meeting room discussing stuff that is irrelevant and boring.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on March 19, 2019, 05:18:43 PM
Afternoon naps if I feel like it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on March 19, 2019, 05:24:26 PM
I really don't like dressing in work clothes. Anything more than shorts and a tee shirt is too much for me.

Can confirm.  Dressing like a broke college kid every day is pretty great.

A lot of the other stuff, though, is not what everyone seems to think it will be.  I still know what day of the week it is, because I still have kids in school and I'm still involved in a variety of community activities.  I also don't sleep in very often, for the exact same reasons.  Grocery shopping at 9am this morning was pretty sweet, that part is totally true.  Also, Sunday evenings are not stress-inducing anymore because I have nothing to dread.

But my retirement is not the lazy life of leisure some people imagine it will be.  At least for me, there has been a very limited amount of napping and sleeping late.  I don't watch television.  I don't go fishing, or drink beer all day, or go days and days without engaging with society.  I'm still doing stuff, it's just not stuff I have to do from the inside of a cubicle.  On the bright side, it's stuff I want to do and not stuff I have to do, so I don't really mind being busy.

Early retirement doesn't absolve you of all responsibility, the way a bunch of people in this thread seem to think it will.  If anything, it makes you more responsible, not less, because it forces you to identify what you're going to do with your time and your life instead of just blindly following orders day in and day out.  You have to decide what you're going to do and then you have to do it, because you said you would, and it reflects poorly on you as a person to not do so.  In some ways, being a corporate drone is easier.  Just show up every day and do what they tell you, and take home money.  There is no existential crisis, no search for meaning or purpose, there is only the inevitable suffering of servitude.  There is security and predictability in that.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Kay-Ell on March 19, 2019, 05:39:19 PM
I’ve been semi-fired for about a year and a half and this thread is bringing back terrible memories.

Meetings! Urgh. The startup I worked for was acquired my a meeting heavy company that changed our whole culture. Took 6 meetings with 4 different teams of people to come up with a plan to get budget approval to tie my own damn shoes.

Being around people all day as an introvert! As well as NOT being around animals all day.

Having to live my life around a prescribed schedule of when to wake up, when to eat, when to be productive, when to fuck around online pretending to be productive. Which days to dread, which ones to look forward to.  And then on my two days of freedom each week, feeling like I was wasting half of them just lying around recoperating while I tried to do some laundry and grocery shopping, without any motivation to actually do the things I wanted to do with my life.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: WSUCoug1994 on March 19, 2019, 05:50:19 PM
Weekly update calls with my clients - these stress inducing calls that happen every week during the duration of my projects x 15 clients at a time.  I love my clients (well most of them) BUT I AINT GONNA MISS 'EM.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: hoodedfalcon on March 19, 2019, 05:58:48 PM
I want to stop pretending to give a fuck.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on March 19, 2019, 06:02:15 PM
I want to stop pretending to give a fuck.

Ha ha! THIS!

Also the clothes one. Having to get up at a certain time, shower, do my hair, put together an office appropriate outfit. I'm over it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LifePhaseTwo on March 19, 2019, 06:09:21 PM
I want to stop pretending to give a fuck.

Exactly - this was sapping my energy. Every. Damn. Day.
I FIRE’d 4 months ago and it’s freaking amazing!!! I sleep well, sleep in every day, wear what I want, care about things that are important to me, spend time with my awesome grandkids, read books, exercise and take better care of myself, eat better, relax more and do whatever the heck I like!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Trifele on March 19, 2019, 06:18:57 PM
I just FIREd at the end of January.  And I never.have.to.wear.makeup.again.  EVER.  I also donated all my fancy work clothes and got them immediately the hell out of my house.  I now exist happily in my 'weekend' clothes all the time. 

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Gail2000 on March 19, 2019, 06:20:40 PM
So I don't have to sit in traffic anymore.

Once I FIRE I can travel using at my leisure, maybe take public transportation or bike. And I can avoid rush hour because I don't have to actually be anywhere. :) My commute isn't terrible but I hate the waste time in the car when I could be somewhere else doing something else that is actually productive.

If enough of you fire in my area, my commute wouldn’t be so bad. Win win
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: turketron on March 19, 2019, 06:55:12 PM
Workplace bathrooms.
That's one of the things I'll miss!  "Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime..."

Right? Getting paid for my bathroom time in a bathroom I'm not responsible for cleaning? Definitely something I'll miss.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Fomerly known as something on March 19, 2019, 06:57:04 PM
Being able to pick my own plane flights and not having to go with the routes contract carrier even if that means having a 30 minute connection in Chicago in the winter.  (and then having to spend all day and another connection through Newark and still not knowing if I'd get to where I need to work the next day)

Also as long as I have my diabetic cat I will have to have my alarm in RE.  The fuzzy needs his insulin 12 hours apart, right now it's 6am and 6pm.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: gerardc on March 19, 2019, 07:08:45 PM
I want to quit work before it affects my appearance too much - wrinkles, extra pounds, gray hair.

this
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: frizzywhiskers on March 19, 2019, 07:30:57 PM
... on my two days of freedom each week, feeling like I was wasting half of them just lying around recoperating while I tried to do some laundry and grocery shopping, without any motivation to actually do the things I wanted to do with my life.
This!  So much this!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MrThatsDifferent on March 19, 2019, 07:45:32 PM
I want to have sex during the day.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: brooklynmoney on March 19, 2019, 07:57:51 PM
I want to be able to dress like teenage me again.  Doc Martens, black nail polish and dye my hair any color I want.  Might look a bit silly on a 40 something but I just want to have the freedom not to have to dress in a "professional" manner. 

I also love sleeping in and want to do that a whole lot.  And also want to avoid the small talk with coworkers, performance reviews and having to be nice to my boss.

This is kind of sappy but I'd also like to spend the majority of my day with the people I love ie. my husband and kids - rather than with my coworkers.

I don’t have kids or a husband but I am 1000% with you on the clothes. I just want to wear workout clothes. I have wasted time and money on buying “meeting” clothes. And I only have to wear them a few times a month. I can’t imagine if I had to dress up every day.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: daffodil2001 on March 19, 2019, 08:00:25 PM
Sunshine. In winter I start work before sunrise and depending on how close we are to the equinox it’s either dark or close to it by the time I’m done. I probably have seasonal affective disorder (and should probably talk to my doctor about it but that would require actually going to see the doctor). I do a lot better emotionally when I get at least four hours of sunshine. Even going for a walk on my lunch break isn’t enough.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on March 19, 2019, 08:40:21 PM
I don't do mornings.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Luck12 on March 19, 2019, 09:11:53 PM

3. I am so tired of having to interface and rely on people that do not give a damn, are complacent or just do as little as humanly possible without getting fired.


I don't want to have to be around people who use fancy sounding dumbass words like "interface".    Also don't want to deal with people who take our bullshit work so seriously.   Nobody is going to fucking die if the response to the corporate client is at 9AM tomm morning vs 5PM today.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: pdxvandal on March 19, 2019, 09:52:45 PM
Great thread and I concur with most reasons.

My list:

Lunch meetings (with no lunch provided)
"High importance!" emails
Seven hours worth of meetings in an 8-hour day
"Strategic objectives"
All hands on deck
"Mission and values"
Four months without a dishwasher in the break room (one arrived a week ago, but is sitting still wrapped), "Your mom doesn't work here, wash your dishes" sign
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: EscapeVelocity2020 on March 19, 2019, 09:53:55 PM
Luckily engineers don't really care what you wear to work, business casual now includes jeans and sneakers.  I have a very simple and comfortable wardrobe, set on infinite repeat, but when I started I had to wear a tie and that was what got me started on saving like a FIend.

My petty reason, to eat what I want whenever I want, a la https://youtu.be/H6u0VBqNBQ8?t=135

Or maybe it is to screw around on researching stuff like consciousness, AI, and economics for fun all day...

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: PhrugalPhan on March 19, 2019, 09:57:26 PM
So I can talk with people during working hours that can speak English.  (It wasn't this way when I started but in the past decade management has decided that being able to speak so others can understand you is severely over-rated)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: L8_apex on March 19, 2019, 10:42:17 PM
Timesheets.  Then explaining to the client why it took so long to fix the last clusterfack
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on March 19, 2019, 10:52:01 PM
One more petty reason:

Not having to hear the word "ping" being used as a verb in a non-technical sense. Somehow engineers think this is a verb, and non-engineers don't understand them in context.

Normal people don't use the word "ping" as a verb to see if someone answers their phone or texts.

I have not heard the word "ping" in over a year and that makes me happy.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tuskalusa on March 20, 2019, 12:01:59 AM
I really hate being told what to do, where to be, and when to do it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bloop Bloop on March 20, 2019, 12:13:19 AM
I like supercars and want to buy one and just have fun with it, detail it in my garage, take it out on track, etc, and enjoy it, and meet other supercar owners and all of that is hard if you have a day job. Plus it's so much more fun if people ask you what you do to afford it and you can honestly say "I'm unemployed."
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on March 20, 2019, 03:17:40 AM
Being able to go outside and do something fun on those days with really nice weather. And as mentioned above, to be able to go outside during daylight hours in the midst of the winter.

Being able to extend my trips to our cabin when the skiing circumstances there are perfect. Not needing to stress on any type of vacations to make it back on a fixed date.

Being able to book flights whenever the prices are lowest.

To avoid scrum meetings. Those are shortish, daily meetings. Everytime I am working on something in deep concentration and really getting into a good flow, there is a scrum meeting. That means: drop everything you're doing and come to report in detail what you did since yesterday's meeting and what you will be doing after today's meeting. Difficult to pretend you did a lot of work on the days you haven't been doing that.

To avoid sitting in a noisy working landscape. What a hell this workplace is for me who can't concentrate at all in noisy surroundings. Also avoiding a very noisy cafeteria to eat lunch in. Some days it is stressful to have a break there, because of the noise.

To not have to work with a certain co-worker who blows up every minor 5-minute task into a major issue that needs discussions (with me and others) and diagrams and lots of written comments in different colours.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: aGracefulStomp on March 20, 2019, 03:37:05 AM
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"


I will never ask about anyones weekend ever, nor answer a question about my weekend, when I FIRE.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on March 20, 2019, 03:40:04 AM
I am surprised no one has mentioned office radio yet. Having to listen to the radio at work is probably my least favourite part of being employed. I love music but my coworkers always choose the most bland station and there are commercials all the time.

I also hate dressing up for work. My coworkers dress in business casual style and they allow me to dress slightly more casually - I walk a long distance to work so they don't mind me not wearing heels for example - but it's still awful. Plus hair and make-up. I just can't do it, I'm always the girl looking slightly scruffy at work no matter how hard I try and I hate it. I have to have two different sets of clothing because I'm not going to wear work clothes outside of work. There's also lots of pressure on women to wear a variety of fashionable clothing instead of the same work 'uniform' every day.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on March 20, 2019, 03:46:27 AM
I am surprised no one has mentioned office radio yet. Having to listen to the radio at work is probably my least favourite part of being employed. I love music but my coworkers always choose the most bland station and there are commercials all the time.

Maybe radio at work is not so common in other countries, depending on the type of work place.
I remember we had radio at work when I lived and worked in the Netherlands.
Here in Norway work radio is not really a thing in places where I worked.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Hula Hoop on March 20, 2019, 04:25:10 AM
I am surprised no one has mentioned office radio yet. Having to listen to the radio at work is probably my least favourite part of being employed. I love music but my coworkers always choose the most bland station and there are commercials all the time.

Maybe radio at work is not so common in other countries, depending on the type of work place.
I remember we had radio at work when I lived and worked in the Netherlands.
Here in Norway work radio is not really a thing in places where I worked.

Definitely, no workplace radio here.  In fact, yesterday I walked into the work kitchen and a colleague was there listening to top 40 type music on her phone.  She immediately turned it down and asked it I was ok with the music.  I told her to turn it back up as I was just there to microwave my lunch from home.  She seemed really surprised.  It would be really tough to work with music on (especially horrible music) at work.  I would find that really hard so you have my sympathy.

As far as clothes, my boss decided that we'd do casual Fridays a while back and I just LOVE going to work in jeans and sneakers on a Friday.  I still feel some pressure to wear clean clothes that match though as the rest of my office is formal every day of the week.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on March 20, 2019, 04:44:25 AM
Damn...no wonder you all want to FIRE so bad...I don't even consider any of these things petty...

Suddenly I feel very spoiled in my job where I don't work often, wear comfy athletic clothes and running shoes, have my own playlist, and if there's a meeting then I'm the one running it.

My only thing is that although I have control over my schedule, I need to set it months in advance. An impromptu day off is impossible.
It's annoying, but I have most days off so it's not a big deal.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on March 20, 2019, 04:46:14 AM
I am surprised no one has mentioned office radio yet. Having to listen to the radio at work is probably my least favourite part of being employed. I love music but my coworkers always choose the most bland station and there are commercials all the time.

Maybe radio at work is not so common in other countries, depending on the type of work place.
I remember we had radio at work when I lived and worked in the Netherlands.
Here in Norway work radio is not really a thing in places where I worked.

I didn't know that, I guess I should move! ;) I know having the radio on in the office is common in the Netherlands and Belgium. To me it's just noise pollution.

I am lucky that on Wednesday our office is almost empty and I  can wear what I like, but I'm still not wearing my regular weekend outfits ( oversized knitted sweaters, flower print dresses, band shirts and boots) but a neat pair of dark jeans and a classic woollen jumper. Comfortable but not really something that makes me happy.

Also: endless webex meetings where everyone is secretly sleeping except for the host
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Loren Ver on March 20, 2019, 05:12:18 AM
Needing to buy and wear lab appropriate shoes.  I have 8 working days left and my shoes died a while ago, but I keep wearing them.

In my size, they are expensive, hard to find, and not something I would buy if I didn't have to.

LV
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on March 20, 2019, 05:18:16 AM
My boss has a TV on all the time. Luckily he is two doors down so it is not that obtrusive if he keeps it low. The other boss has one also, but thankfully keeps it on mute most of the time.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Playing with Fire UK on March 20, 2019, 05:35:46 AM
I really hate being told what to do, where to be, and when to do it.

I'll add, by idiots managers who don't know what I should be doing, where I can do it and when I can do it best.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FindingFI on March 20, 2019, 06:04:41 AM
I can't wait for the ability to control the thermostat, specifically the AC.  In summers here I'm dressing for 80F for the drive to work and bringing sweaters and layers to survive 65F in the office. It's insane! Not to mention wasteful!

And being able to see outside. I have an interior, basement-level office. I don't see the outdoors for 9 hours a day and its depressing.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Unique User on March 20, 2019, 06:07:37 AM
I work from home, so don't have to deal with office bs, commute bs, clothes or make-up bs.  BUT, the meetings kill me.  I hate Skype, I get dropped all the time and try amuse myself with playing conference call bingo, but it just reminds me how much I can't stand the endless meetings.  Or being a manager.  Or having team members overseas.  Or dealing with people who know everything.        Or "circle back", "reach out", "deep dive", "needful is done", "revert back" and all the other stupid phrases that get used. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mmm_Donuts on March 20, 2019, 06:18:25 AM
I never want to hear the words "Happy Friday" again.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireAnt on March 20, 2019, 06:40:47 AM
I want to FIRE so I never have to engage in scripted conversations with coworkers again.

"Big plans for the weekend?" "The weather is so [insert platitude here]! Can't wait for [next season]!" "How is it only Tuesday? Feels like it's been a full week already!" "TGIF!".

Urg. I hate that this is essentially performance art. Nobody is listening to the answers - it's automatic responses once the speech machinery has been set in motion.

yes yes yes! Mindless interactions bothers me to no end. When people ask "How are you?" ..."Fine" (don't you dare say anything else but fine!)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 20, 2019, 06:51:10 AM
I want to FIRE so I never have to engage in scripted conversations with coworkers again.

"Big plans for the weekend?" "The weather is so [insert platitude here]! Can't wait for [next season]!" "How is it only Tuesday? Feels like it's been a full week already!" "TGIF!".

Urg. I hate that this is essentially performance art. Nobody is listening to the answers - it's automatic responses once the speech machinery has been set in motion.


yes yes yes! Mindless interactions bothers me to no end. When people ask "How are you?" ..."Fine" (don't you dare say anything else but fine!)

I think I'm really lucky in that regard. I work in a small business with just six employees (including the owner). We actually talk about each other's lives because we genuinely like each other, which is a really nice change from my previous employers. I've been at work for 45 minutes, and I literally just got done talking to everyone so I can start my work. I'm an introvert, too, but the "small talk" doesn't feel like wasted time when you have legitimate friendships at the office, rather than forced interactions.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Hula Hoop on March 20, 2019, 06:53:06 AM
I think this is an Italian thing but the endless small talk about food and digestion.  I remember one day my colleagues were having a huge heated discussion about the tastiest brand of tuna fish at the supermarket.  Today, I went into the work kitchen and they were all chatting about which fruits they find "difficult to digest".  These are people younger than me not old people.  TMI and sooo boring.  I'd almost prefer to talk about the weather.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on March 20, 2019, 06:54:19 AM
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"


I will never ask about anyones weekend ever, nor answer a question about my weekend, when I FIRE.

+1 for weekend interrogations. It's nobody's business to ask what I do in the weekend. If I have something to tell, I will do so by myself.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Philociraptor on March 20, 2019, 07:18:39 AM
Not necessarily petty, but not waking up to an alarm would be bliss.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Raenia on March 20, 2019, 07:40:56 AM
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"


I will never ask about anyones weekend ever, nor answer a question about my weekend, when I FIRE.

+1 for weekend interrogations. It's nobody's business to ask what I do in the weekend. If I have something to tell, I will do so by myself.

In my experience, anyone asking about my weekend really just wants to talk about theirs.  If I have something interesting to say, I will respond, but otherwise, a "Nothing much, what about you?" lets them get it out of their system while I listen with half an ear and make mhmm noises.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DeepEllumStache on March 20, 2019, 08:21:28 AM
Email distribution lists that are only relevant to your job 2% of the time, so you're stuck sifting through the other 98%.

And the ridiculous reply all chains where some poor soul accidentally emails 20k+ people on a distribution list in the company and morons keep replying all to "remove me". We had one that generated at least 100 of those responses.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bird In Hand on March 20, 2019, 08:22:02 AM
Not necessarily petty, but not waking up to an alarm would be bliss.

This is the one that I'd choose.  More generally, "going to bed when I want to and waking up when I want to".  Unfortunately for those of us who might FIRE while we still have school-aged kids, this option is off the table.  :/
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on March 20, 2019, 08:48:13 AM
Sunshine. In winter I start work before sunrise and depending on how close we are to the equinox it’s either dark or close to it by the time I’m done. I probably have seasonal affective disorder (and should probably talk to my doctor about it but that would require actually going to see the doctor). I do a lot better emotionally when I get at least four hours of sunshine. Even going for a walk on my lunch break isn’t enough.

+1  this was worse when I lived farther north, but is still an issue after moving 1000 miles south.  I hate having to get up before sunrise.

In the Spring and Fall, for a few weeks at about this time of year, the afternoon sun lights up our bed for several hours.  I want to nap with the cats and the DH in that sun any day I want, not look longingly at the sleeping cats while rushing about on the weekend getting chores done.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Rcc on March 20, 2019, 09:13:55 AM
The seagull management. I've had 3 VPs in TWO years.

They fly in, shit on everything, then fly off. No one seems to know how to reverse the changes they make...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Aelias on March 20, 2019, 09:43:41 AM
I really hate being told what to do, where to be, and when to do it.

YUP.  Fortunately, I've found my way to a job where I have a lot of freedom to do my thing. But not complete freedom.  And being volun-told to take over a task no one else wants is a near constant irritant.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Samuel on March 20, 2019, 09:56:14 AM
Having to shave every day.


Also: endless webex meetings where everyone is secretly sleeping except for the host

I am in one of those this very minute...


Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on March 20, 2019, 10:18:55 AM
Weather.

I hate the cold in the winter, and I hate the humidity in the summer. So I'm going to spend winters in Florida and summers...well, I haven't worked out where to spend summers yet.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 20, 2019, 10:20:32 AM
One more petty reason:

Not having to hear the word "ping" being used as a verb in a non-technical sense. Somehow engineers think this is a verb, and non-engineers don't understand them in context.

Normal people don't use the word "ping" as a verb to see if someone answers their phone or texts.

I have not heard the word "ping" in over a year and that makes me happy.

Wat.  Ping isn't a universal verb?  I'm pinging to the left and pinging the right.  I'll ping you over email or ping you on Skype.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Fish Sweet on March 20, 2019, 10:26:05 AM
NEVER EVER COMMUTE AGAIN.  I live in a place where the traffic is atrocious, and my long-ass commute is a major source of stress.

That, and be able to go out/stay in at my leisure on rainy days. :)  I love walking in the rain, and I love sitting cozy on my couch with a hot drink in hand listening to the sound of the rain.  Neither of which I can do while I'm at work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on March 20, 2019, 10:31:38 AM
One more petty reason:

Not having to hear the word "ping" being used as a verb in a non-technical sense. Somehow engineers think this is a verb, and non-engineers don't understand them in context.

Normal people don't use the word "ping" as a verb to see if someone answers their phone or texts.

I have not heard the word "ping" in over a year and that makes me happy.

Wat.  Ping isn't a universal verb?  I'm pinging to the left and pinging the right.  I'll ping you over email or ping you on Skype.

Thank you for ruining my otherwise blissfull day in FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ender on March 20, 2019, 10:46:28 AM
Wat.  Ping isn't a universal verb?  I'm pinging to the left and pinging the right.  I'll ping you over email or ping you on Skype.

Thank you for ruining my otherwise blissfull day in FIRE.

I thought that the player on the left pinged and the player on the right ponged.

Have I been wrong all these years!!1
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: mathlete on March 20, 2019, 11:00:35 AM
Petty reasons to pursue FIRE:

- I won't back down
- Spend more time with my American Girl
- Tired of of having to remind my superiors not to do me like that
- No longer want to be concerned with corporate profits that are free fallin'
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireAnt on March 20, 2019, 11:02:02 AM
Also, I get all these awesome deal notifications from Travelzoo and Scotts Cheap Flights. I just want to take advantage of them instead of having to see if I have enough PTO, waiting to see if the PTO will be approved, blah blah blah. However, I am a little worried that I'll get carried away when I FIRE haha.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Cool Friend on March 20, 2019, 11:10:09 AM
Petty reasons to pursue FIRE:

- I won't back down
- Spend more time with my American Girl
- Tired of of having to remind my superiors not to do me like that
- No longer want to be concerned with corporate profits that are free fallin'

haha
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on March 20, 2019, 11:14:27 AM
I think this is an Italian thing but the endless small talk about food and digestion.  I remember one day my colleagues were having a huge heated discussion about the tastiest brand of tuna fish at the supermarket.  Today, I went into the work kitchen and they were all chatting about which fruits they find "difficult to digest".  These are people younger than me not old people.  TMI and sooo boring.  I'd almost prefer to talk about the weather.

A roommate during an internship in college told me that anybody who has a drop of Italian blood will be focused on food.  This was after a long conversation about what we liked to eat and then finding out my grandmother was Italian. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on March 20, 2019, 11:19:29 AM
Petty reasons to pursue FIRE:

- I won't back down
- Spend more time with my American Girl
- Tired of of having to remind my superiors not to do me like that
- No longer want to be concerned with corporate profits that are free fallin'

Then die of a drug overdose?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Steveray7071 on March 20, 2019, 11:31:48 AM
I really hate being told what to do, where to be, and when to do it.

This!  Perfectly said!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireAnt on March 20, 2019, 11:35:16 AM
I think this is an Italian thing but the endless small talk about food and digestion.  I remember one day my colleagues were having a huge heated discussion about the tastiest brand of tuna fish at the supermarket.  Today, I went into the work kitchen and they were all chatting about which fruits they find "difficult to digest".  These are people younger than me not old people.  TMI and sooo boring.  I'd almost prefer to talk about the weather.

A roommate during an internship in college told me that anybody who has a drop of Italian blood will be focused on food.  This was after a long conversation about what we liked to eat and then finding out my grandmother was Italian.

I can confirm this is true.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tyson on March 20, 2019, 11:46:39 AM
I hate waking up to an alarm clock.  If I could just sleep to whatever time my body needed I'd be so much happier. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Rubyvroom on March 20, 2019, 12:00:45 PM
I will gladly never set foot in places like Ann Taylor's Loft again.

Women's shoes with heels can go back to the depths of hell from which they spawned.

I will never smell burned popcorn over lunchtime again.

Interviews - you are dead to me now. No, how about YOU tell me about a time you solved a problem, you asshole.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: jlcnuke on March 20, 2019, 12:07:51 PM
Hmm, let's see - sleep when I want, for as long as my body deems necessary is high on the list. An end to commuting and dealing with rush hour is not far from the top of the list of reasons to FIRE as well.

Reasons I haven't seen/didn't notice:
1. Never again having to estimate how long it will take to do something that's never been done before with an unknown scope, but let's make my random guess the official budget proposal anyway, even though I told you it was just a shot in the dark.
2. An end to "go ahead and work these 5 projects simultaneously, but this particular project is the most important one so focus on that..... until next week when I'll ask you why that other one isn't done yet and make it sound like you're incompetent for not realizing I wanted it done first actually... and now it's late and it's all your fault"
3. An end to choosing between being undercompensated because current employers don't increase your pay commensurate with your experience/market value or constantly changing employers (and probably locations) in order to be fairly compensated.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 20, 2019, 12:17:36 PM
Petty reasons to pursue FIRE:

- I won't back down
- Spend more time with my American Girl
- Tired of of having to remind my superiors not to do me like that
- No longer want to be concerned with corporate profits that are free fallin'

HEEEEEYYYYY baby!  There ain't no easy way out.  Ya gotta SAAAAAAVE now, and let it...com...pound.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on March 20, 2019, 12:27:19 PM
I think this is an Italian thing but the endless small talk about food and digestion.
Ahaha, this weeks ItchyFeet: http://www.itchyfeetcomic.com/2019/03/change-subject.html
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FrugalToque on March 20, 2019, 12:30:42 PM
They had this stupid "no alcohol in the office" rule.
And now there's a don't-be-stoned-at-work policy, too, since cannabis became legal.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on March 20, 2019, 12:31:12 PM
I think this is an Italian thing but the endless small talk about food and digestion.  I remember one day my colleagues were having a huge heated discussion about the tastiest brand of tuna fish at the supermarket.  Today, I went into the work kitchen and they were all chatting about which fruits they find "difficult to digest".  These are people younger than me not old people.  TMI and sooo boring.  I'd almost prefer to talk about the weather.

A roommate during an internship in college told me that anybody who has a drop of Italian blood will be focused on food.  This was after a long conversation about what we liked to eat and then finding out my grandmother was Italian.

I can confirm this is true.

You wouldn't want your friends to get the wrong tuna, right?

The fruit thing reminds me of a very serious conversation my dad once had with me about the deleterious effects of peach skin on the digestive system. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 20, 2019, 12:33:21 PM
They had this stupid "no alcohol in the office" rule.
And now there's a don't-be-stoned-at-work policy, too, since cannabis became legal.

It seems a change of country helps.  My Italian headquarters has a beer vending machine.  But they will also berate you about the order you eat your food in, so it's a trade off.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FrugalToque on March 20, 2019, 12:35:11 PM
Petty reasons to pursue FIRE:

- I won't back down
- Spend more time with my American Girl
- Tired of of having to remind my superiors not to do me like that
- No longer want to be concerned with corporate profits that are free fallin'
I need more than just the last dance with Mary Jane?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Polaria on March 20, 2019, 12:46:47 PM
I am surprised no one has mentioned office radio yet. Having to listen to the radio at work is probably my least favourite part of being employed. I love music but my coworkers always choose the most bland station and there are commercials all the time.

Maybe radio at work is not so common in other countries, depending on the type of work place.
I remember we had radio at work when I lived and worked in the Netherlands.
Here in Norway work radio is not really a thing in places where I worked.
I didn't know that, I guess I should move! ;) I know having the radio on in the office is common in the Netherlands and Belgium. To me it's just noise pollution.

In my company (Belgian business unit of a Dutch group) the radio would fly through a window after a few minutes... I almost blew a fuse once when someone in my vicinity started to play the Harry Potter theme with a manual music box. Open spaces are a special kind of hell.

In Belgium we would probably have to set a working group to decide on which respective days the Flemish-speaking radio and the French-speaking radio should be on :p
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Duchess of Stratosphear on March 20, 2019, 12:46:54 PM
I want to be able to travel at any time of the year that I please, not be tied down by the work calendar.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Hula Hoop on March 20, 2019, 12:54:31 PM
They had this stupid "no alcohol in the office" rule.
And now there's a don't-be-stoned-at-work policy, too, since cannabis became legal.

It seems a change of country helps.  My Italian headquarters has a beer vending machine.  But they will also berate you about the order you eat your food in, so it's a trade off.

We have beer and wine in the office cafeteria at my workplace here in Italy.  People drink wine pretty regularly with lunch and then go back to work.  It puts me to sleep though.  Anyway alcohol with lunch is totally fine here but cappuccino after 11 am is taboo. 

That's another thing I want to do after FIRE - make myself a big milky coffee after lunch and drink it at home with no one around to berate me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Aelias on March 20, 2019, 01:05:16 PM
Petty reasons to pursue FIRE:

- I won't back down
- Spend more time with my American Girl
- Tired of of having to remind my superiors not to do me like that
- No longer want to be concerned with corporate profits that are free fallin'

HEEEEEYYYYY baby!  There ain't no easy way out.  Ya gotta SAAAAAAVE now, and let it...com...pound.

That's why we're all running down a dream

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Slow&Steady on March 20, 2019, 01:18:18 PM
Normally I try to focus on the positive but I am feeling grumpy today and this seems like a fun game at the moment.

1. So I no longer have to listen to excuses about why people can not travel or work a longer day because they have to pickup or drop off their kid. We explain in detail exactly what is required and yet for some reason they accept the position and suddenly after being hired they remember that they have a kid.....

2. I want a dog but I am a responsible person and realize that with my current position I can not be home to let the dog out or give them the proper attention meanwhile I listen to my co-workers give lame excuses about why they can not work a longer day or travel because they have to let the dog out or feed it or whatever.

3. I am so tired of having to interface and rely on people that do not give a damn, are complacent or just do as little as humanly possible without getting fired.


So I don't have to interface with people that think working late and traveling for work are more important than spending time with my family.  You want 1 long day every few weeks, fine.  You want me to travel out of state every other month, ok.  You ask me to travel 3 hours away for a Friday/Saturday/Sunday "test the equipment" (that can be done remotely) trip after I get home from from a week long trip at 11PM on Thursday, F*** you.

True petty reason is that I hate alarm clocks and dress clothes.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 20, 2019, 01:21:32 PM
That's another thing I want to do after FIRE - make myself a big milky coffee after lunch and drink it at home with no one around to berate me.
YOU CAN'T DIGEST MILK THAT LATE IN THE DAYYYYYY

I received this "advice".  I was also advised that I eat salad wrong because I once ate my salad before my entree in the work cafeteria.  Pure travesty.  It's not my fault I need extra fiber to combat the salty seafood and high volume of pasta.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Omy on March 20, 2019, 01:30:36 PM
Well it's not really the reason I want to FIRE, but the petty part of me won't mind if my spendy ex finds out that I've retired a decade or two before he is able to. Ex and I had built a sizable nest egg (due to my frugal nature and against his will). We divorced 16 years ago and divided everything in half. While I'm getting ready to ride off into the sunset, he's probably back up to his eyeballs in debt and looking at several expensive years of educating the kids from his third marriage.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Candace on March 20, 2019, 01:51:26 PM
Already FIRE'd here. I can remember just dreaming for the day when, as someone else upthread said, I didn't have to pretend to give a fuck. Let me tell you, not having to pretend I care about work I found less than meaningful is relative bliss.

Also, if I'm having a gassy afternoon, I don't have to keep walking 80 or so yards to the ladies' room.

Hey, we said petty, right?

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 20, 2019, 02:01:06 PM
Already FIRE'd here. I can remember just dreaming for the day when, as someone else upthread said, I didn't have to pretend to give a fuck. Let me tell you, not having to pretend I care about work I found less than meaningful is relative bliss.

Also, if I'm having a gassy afternoon, I don't have to keep walking 80 or so yards to the ladies' room.

Hey, we said petty, right?
YES.  This is the pure petty bullshit I am looking for.

My new reasons:
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on March 20, 2019, 02:19:34 PM
Adding another reason in light of events that occurred today:

Being able to eat lunch in peace and not be asked for anything or have to make conversation
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireLane on March 20, 2019, 02:28:24 PM
Not having to sit at a desk and pretend to be busy on days when I have no real work to do.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Candace on March 20, 2019, 02:28:57 PM
That's another thing I want to do after FIRE - make myself a big milky coffee after lunch and drink it at home with no one around to berate me.
YOU CAN'T DIGEST MILK THAT LATE IN THE DAYYYYYY

I received this "advice".  I was also advised that I eat salad wrong because I once ate my salad before my entree in the work cafeteria.  Pure travesty.  It's not my fault I need extra fiber to combat the salty seafood and high volume of pasta.
You eat salad wrong? There's a wrong way to eat salad?

I have another petty reason I wanted to FIRE, to share. It was to get away from florescent lighting. Just so depressing.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: whitewaterchica on March 20, 2019, 02:37:07 PM
Waking to the sun instead of an alarm.

No longer being given extra work without extra pay.

Not having to manage the lump of mashed potatoes who was passed off to me when my manager couldn't manage him. "We see your potential!" yeah, ok.

Not having to live my life in terms of weekends and vacation days. I fully expect to be even busier when I'm fired but with 90% less b.s. filler.

Not having to talk about what I do, "I'm whitewaterchica, the blah de blah here at gobbly gook." I know it's a way of life here in the USA but I cannot stand making small talk about what I do for a living.

No more SMELLY shared work bathrooms. whew!

No more spending 45+ hours per week with people I do not care to know (introverts unite!!).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: use2betrix on March 20, 2019, 02:47:23 PM
I have to keep reminding myself of the thread title being “petty” reasons to seek FIRE..

I feel like we need to start a thread where people discuss their “actual” problems at work. Some people act like these are real problems, and it just makes me feel like the work issues I stress about are so so much worse lol.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dodojojo on March 20, 2019, 03:09:28 PM
So I don't seethe at conferences that my manager invites me to attend when I have not been at all involved in the project (by his intention) and I'm made to feel like an intern, only there to run stupid errands for him/others. And I have to hear him use "I" in every single achievement statement by our team in his presentation.

Guess what I was doing today?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mike in NH on March 20, 2019, 03:45:10 PM
Email distribution lists that are only relevant to your job 2% of the time, so you're stuck sifting through the other 98%.

And the ridiculous reply all chains where some poor soul accidentally emails 20k+ people on a distribution list in the company and morons keep replying all to "remove me". We had one that generated at least 100 of those responses.

@DeepEllumStache our megacorp suffers from the same situation. I had a bright idea that we could save a lot of costs on performance management and HR by instituting a rule that anyone after the first 5 people to reply all should just get fired each time this happens. I can't believe I work with people who are getting paid a decent wage to be that stupid.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: TexasRunner on March 20, 2019, 04:06:09 PM
Also, when standing behind me as I demonstrated something on my computer screen, I'd notice them staring at the top of my head when I glanced back.

Maybe they were checking their own hairline in the reflection.....?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: PlainsWalker on March 20, 2019, 04:10:34 PM
So I can simplify down to having just one place I sit and browse the internet.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: cats on March 20, 2019, 04:19:23 PM
I want to quit work before it affects my appearance too much - wrinkles, extra pounds, gray hair.

this

Me also.  We periodically have people who retire but spend 2-3 months "vacationing out" and then come back for retirement cake.  They always look better when they come back.

Aside from that, I'm looking forward to being caught up on sleep.  I do have some more "noble" aspirations like spending time volunteering or having more time with my son, but right now, sleeping and finally having the mental energy needed to focus on losing 10 lbs are the most appealing things.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on March 20, 2019, 04:24:20 PM
Not having to wear work clothes and a lanyard ever again.  Every time I take the stupid lanyard off I feel a lightness come over me. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Little Aussie Battler on March 20, 2019, 04:25:17 PM
I don't like being stuck behind slow people on stairs / escalators.  It's ok to be slow, just move out of the bloody way!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Lady SA on March 20, 2019, 05:23:59 PM
1. being forced to wake up at a certain time. I am perpetually crabby from having my natural sleep cycles interrupted!
2. avoid the hectic rush in the mornings as I groggily get up 10 mins before I have to be out the door. What I wouldn't give to just wake up when I want (see #1) and get to have a nice slow start to ease me into the day. Drink some tea, read a chapter of a book, take a shower. Then finally feel ready to face the day.
3. I'm pretty susceptible to stress and get sore legs (I unknowingly tense my calf muscles when stressed) and rosacea flares (a bright, BRIGHT red face flush). I HATE this and get really embarrassed when I flush like that. Removing the trigger will make my face look nicer more often :)
4. I'm an athlete, and honestly the work day really interferes with how often I want to train and do activities or cross-training. I would be much faster/stronger and win more often if I could concentrate solely on building my athletic skills and helping my body perform better.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: BuildingFrugalHabits on March 20, 2019, 05:24:12 PM
Cleaning staff vacuuming my cube like clockwork during normal business hours, especially if I'm on the phone. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: iluvzbeach on March 20, 2019, 05:57:26 PM
Time-tracking
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Steeze on March 20, 2019, 06:47:04 PM
Alarm clocks
Skipping coffee because I’m late
Being late
Skipping breakfast
Skipping lunch
Skipping dinner
Staying late
Going early
Pissed off clients
Pissed off client’s client’s clients that get my cell#
Clerks
Forms
New forms that don’t need to exist
Being told when to be somewhere
Job sites in the winter
Overnight inspections
Weekend inspections
Night and weekend texts from clients
Holiday party speeches
They way my neck hurts
Not snowboarding
Not skateboard
Not camping
The subway during rush hour
The heat breaking in the winter at the office
The A/c breaking at the office
Cleaning the office toilet because no one else will
Having no control of my time
Not remembering what I did last year or the year before
Not having a dog
Not having a garden
Fixing other people’s problems

CHASING OTHER PEOPLE’S DREAMS
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on March 20, 2019, 07:21:04 PM
Yea, I highly recommend retirement to all of you peeps.  Just reading this thread is stressing me out, reminding me of what my old life was like.  It genuinely does get better, I promise.

I too used to make lists of the things I hated.  The reasons I needed to quit, the injustices and idiocy and the repetitive bullshit work that didn't need to exist, but in retrospect that was just me wallowing in self-pity.  Looking back on it now, that version of me feels angry and cruel.  There's just no reason to live like that.

Maybe a more helpful exercise is to identify the things that you think you will miss about your job, the good things, and then make a plan for how to preserve as much of that as possible after you retire.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on March 20, 2019, 08:10:16 PM
I don't want to have to leave the house when the weather's horrible unless I choose to.

I don't want to spend the entire summer - which is fleeting where I live - freezing my ass off because the office AC is running at absurd levels.

And I want to be able to stop forcing my body to adhere to a schedule that it does not want.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: fuzzy math on March 20, 2019, 08:31:22 PM
They closed the nearest lunch room on my side of the building and I don't always have time to walk to the other side of the building (medical field, take a break when you have 4 minutes or forever forgo the option). So sometimes I eat in the chairs in the locker room (everyone does). The chairs face the door to the bathroom with 2 toilet stalls and some of the more depraved or "innocent" people go in there and take a shit without closing the door to the room. WHY!??? Are you too embarrassed for people to see you close the door because they will know you might shit? So instead you're gonna shit with the door open WHILE I'M EATING and hope no one notices?

I hate carrying a pager. I hate that it means I can't drink a lot of water or any liquid without worrying that I'll be trapped at work unable to use a restroom, or eat food that's going to upset my guts without having to worry about how it could impact my entire night and following day. If I want to rip up my intestines eating mung bean Asian glass noodles, I should have that freedom.

My scrubs come individually in a plastic sleeves now. So every day I throw away 3 sleeves. A little part of me dies counting the number of bags that I will have utilized before I fire.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Aegishjalmur on March 20, 2019, 09:10:38 PM
Better dreams-

Before I FIRE'd I would have dreams about work and bore myself awake, then lie in bed unable to get back to sleep before having to go to work and do what I was just dreaming about doing.... Blech....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: TartanTallulah on March 20, 2019, 09:37:52 PM
Never having to be in the same room as that colleague who repeats the last few words of everything they say then looks around for a reaction while going, "Hmm, hmm, hmm?"
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ItsALongStory on March 21, 2019, 12:04:15 AM
I hope to retire at 44 so I don't have to hear my wife brag about how she returned at 45. It's more of a competitive thing than jealousy of course. She was retired when we met.

Sent from my Pixel 2 XL using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ItsALongStory on March 21, 2019, 12:09:13 AM
Email distribution lists that are only relevant to your job 2% of the time, so you're stuck sifting through the other 98%.

And the ridiculous reply all chains where some poor soul accidentally emails 20k+ people on a distribution list in the company and morons keep replying all to "remove me". We had one that generated at least 100 of those responses.

@DeepEllumStache our megacorp suffers from the same situation. I had a bright idea that we could save a lot of costs on performance management and HR by instituting a rule that anyone after the first 5 people to reply all should just get fired each time this happens. I can't believe I work with people who are getting paid a decent wage to be that stupid.
We must work at the same place. I love the 'ignore' feature in Outlook for these scenarios. Also use it for happy birthday string that aren't restricted from reply all.

Sent from my Pixel 2 XL using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: aGracefulStomp on March 21, 2019, 02:22:51 AM
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"


I will never ask about anyones weekend ever, nor answer a question about my weekend, when I FIRE.

+1 for weekend interrogations. It's nobody's business to ask what I do in the weekend. If I have something to tell, I will do so by myself.

In my experience, anyone asking about my weekend really just wants to talk about theirs.  If I have something interesting to say, I will respond, but otherwise, a "Nothing much, what about you?" lets them get it out of their system while I listen with half an ear and make mhmm noises.

Absolutely agree, which is why it's so inanely mind deafening. No one gives a shit. Everyone's asking because they have too. No one cares about the answer. No one really enjoys answering the question.

It's just a constant reminder that yet another week has passed and we're all still here, staring at computers from the morning till evening, week in ... and week out.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on March 21, 2019, 03:38:11 AM
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"


I will never ask about anyones weekend ever, nor answer a question about my weekend, when I FIRE.

+1 for weekend interrogations. It's nobody's business to ask what I do in the weekend. If I have something to tell, I will do so by myself.

In my experience, anyone asking about my weekend really just wants to talk about theirs.  If I have something interesting to say, I will respond, but otherwise, a "Nothing much, what about you?" lets them get it out of their system while I listen with half an ear and make mhmm noises.

Absolutely agree, which is why it's so inanely mind deafening. No one gives a shit. Everyone's asking because they have too. No one cares about the answer. No one really enjoys answering the question.

It's just a constant reminder that yet another week has passed and we're all still here, staring at computers from the morning till evening, week in ... and week out.

I have a coworker who really seems to want to know what I do outside of work and will keep asking. I'm always struggling to five politically correct answers, because I know saying I went to a punk or black metal show is not the smartest thing to do.

Another thing that's really annoying is politics. We had provincial elections yesterday and most of my coworkers have voted for a party I truly dispise (their campaign slogan was 'no more immigration, no more climate madness' ) and several coworkers have tried to find out who I voted for. I don't talk about politics at work as a matter of principle. They wouldn't ask me directly because it would be rude, but from my mustachian behaviour they've figured out that I probably vote for one of the green parties so they just start bashing the national party leaders to see if they can get a reaction out of me.

Yes, they guessed right, no, they won't get any reaction out of me, no, I don't care about what you think about the national leadership because this is a provincial election.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ender on March 21, 2019, 05:32:19 AM
This thread has made me realize how good of a job I actually have.

... though I'm still going to be quite happy to not have it eventually :-)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 21, 2019, 06:06:06 AM
This thread has made me realize how good of a job I actually have.

... though I'm still going to be quite happy to not have it eventually :-)

Yup. My reasons for FIRE mostly just involve personal freedom, not escaping a toxic or annoying work environment. That said, this is my fifth job in the ten years since graduating from college, and it's the first workplace I can actually say that about....And I still want to FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Philociraptor on March 21, 2019, 06:18:19 AM
The office coffee always tastes burnt, even if I make it fresh and even after we bought a new machine.  How?

Does it have a warmer pan you can't turn off? Or that always seems to be left on so that when the pot is empty the last bit crusts to the bottom and it gets all smokey?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 21, 2019, 06:30:06 AM
The office coffee always tastes burnt, even if I make it fresh and even after we bought a new machine.  How?

Does it have a warmer pan you can't turn off? Or that always seems to be left on so that when the pot is empty the last bit crusts to the bottom and it gets all smokey?

Two jobs ago, we had the same problem. But it was the coffee, not the coffee maker. A fresh batch in a freshly-cleaned pot tasted just as burnt as a pot that had been sitting for three hours. Strangely, the coffee was Maxwell House - which I usually find inoffensive, if not particularly appealing - but apparently this was a special blend of over-roasted beans specially priced for the discriminating, cost-conscious megacorp.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dude on March 21, 2019, 07:15:58 AM
To give the big Middle Finger to The Man.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on March 21, 2019, 07:16:58 AM
The office coffee always tastes burnt, even if I make it fresh and even after we bought a new machine.  How?

Does it have a warmer pan you can't turn off? Or that always seems to be left on so that when the pot is empty the last bit crusts to the bottom and it gets all smokey?

Two jobs ago, we had the same problem. But it was the coffee, not the coffee maker. A fresh batch in a freshly-cleaned pot tasted just as burnt as a pot that had been sitting for three hours. Strangely, the coffee was Maxwell House - which I usually find inoffensive, if not particularly appealing - but apparently this was a special blend of over-roasted beans specially priced for the discriminating, cost-conscious megacorp.

Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!
It's super oily too, it tastes like burnt microwave popcorn.
OMG it's disgusting.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 21, 2019, 07:39:32 AM
The office coffee always tastes burnt, even if I make it fresh and even after we bought a new machine.  How?

Does it have a warmer pan you can't turn off? Or that always seems to be left on so that when the pot is empty the last bit crusts to the bottom and it gets all smokey?

Two jobs ago, we had the same problem. But it was the coffee, not the coffee maker. A fresh batch in a freshly-cleaned pot tasted just as burnt as a pot that had been sitting for three hours. Strangely, the coffee was Maxwell House - which I usually find inoffensive, if not particularly appealing - but apparently this was a special blend of over-roasted beans specially priced for the discriminating, cost-conscious megacorp.

Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!
It's super oily too, it tastes like burnt microwave popcorn.
OMG it's disgusting.

Yes - burnt popcorn is a good descriptor. Godawful stuff. And I drank gallons of it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Philociraptor on March 21, 2019, 07:43:31 AM
The office coffee always tastes burnt, even if I make it fresh and even after we bought a new machine.  How?

Does it have a warmer pan you can't turn off? Or that always seems to be left on so that when the pot is empty the last bit crusts to the bottom and it gets all smokey?

Two jobs ago, we had the same problem. But it was the coffee, not the coffee maker. A fresh batch in a freshly-cleaned pot tasted just as burnt as a pot that had been sitting for three hours. Strangely, the coffee was Maxwell House - which I usually find inoffensive, if not particularly appealing - but apparently this was a special blend of over-roasted beans specially priced for the discriminating, cost-conscious megacorp.

Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!
It's super oily too, it tastes like burnt microwave popcorn.
OMG it's disgusting.

Yes - burnt popcorn is a good descriptor. Godawful stuff. And I drank gallons of it.
I found that adding a pinch of salt and a bit of water fixed the bitterness at least.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 21, 2019, 07:50:37 AM
The office coffee always tastes burnt, even if I make it fresh and even after we bought a new machine.  How?

Does it have a warmer pan you can't turn off? Or that always seems to be left on so that when the pot is empty the last bit crusts to the bottom and it gets all smokey?

Two jobs ago, we had the same problem. But it was the coffee, not the coffee maker. A fresh batch in a freshly-cleaned pot tasted just as burnt as a pot that had been sitting for three hours. Strangely, the coffee was Maxwell House - which I usually find inoffensive, if not particularly appealing - but apparently this was a special blend of over-roasted beans specially priced for the discriminating, cost-conscious megacorp.

Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!
It's super oily too, it tastes like burnt microwave popcorn.
OMG it's disgusting.

Yes - burnt popcorn is a good descriptor. Godawful stuff. And I drank gallons of it.
I found that adding a pinch of salt and a bit of water fixed the bitterness at least.

Thanks for the tip - I hope I never have to use it. Current employer has better coffee than what we buy at home :)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on March 21, 2019, 08:37:03 AM
Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!

Ya'll should be happy that your employer provides coffee, even if it's bad.  I was a federal employee, and free coffee was explicitly banned as part of the "waste, fraud, and abuse" campaign.  Apparently it was considered illegal "extra" compensation for all of those "overpaid" federal workers.

Amazing how we can bitch about free stuff, right?  I think that's a sign that the coffee itself isn't really the problem, and that people who are unhappy in their jobs will complain about anything.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 21, 2019, 08:48:56 AM
Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!

Ya'll should be happy that your employer provides coffee, even if it's bad.  I was a federal employee, and free coffee was explicitly banned as part of the "waste, fraud, and abuse" campaign.  Apparently it was considered illegal "extra" compensation for all of those "overpaid" federal workers.

Amazing how we can bitch about free stuff, right?  I think that's a sign that the coffee itself isn't really the problem, and that people who are unhappy in their jobs will complain about anything.

Yep. My job with the bad coffee had all sorts of perks that would make it theoretically a great job. A vehicle that I got to drive for personal and work use; freedom to eat lunch at home with my wife and kids most of the time; super-cheap health coverage. But the toxic nature of the management was so bad that I couldn't get out fast enough. Our region manager died a month before I left, and I was severely conflicted by the elation I felt at the death of another human being...But he was a wretched person who lived to make everyone under him as miserable as he was.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: HMman on March 21, 2019, 09:03:56 AM
Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!

Ya'll should be happy that your employer provides coffee, even if it's bad.  I was a federal employee, and free coffee was explicitly banned as part of the "waste, fraud, and abuse" campaign.  Apparently it was considered illegal "extra" compensation for all of those "overpaid" federal workers.

Hear hear. I work for the Canadian federal government, and *any* non-work-essential perks aren't allowed to be free. We have to pay if we want burnt coffee.

I've given it some thought, and I can't think of any petty reasons for wanting FIRE - all of mine seem pretty reasonable to me (freedom of time, pursuing work that's interesting but low/non paying, etc.). Keep the pettiness coming!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on March 21, 2019, 09:52:34 AM
A couple more:

Not having to deal with the endless cycle of "When can you have this done?" "Well, that depends - when will I receive the info I need to work on it, and what's the scope?" "Uhhhh.... dunno. BUT WHEN CAN YOU HAVE IT DONE?"

Never again having to listen to all the goddamned breakroom discussions about people's Whole30/how they shouldn't eat the cake in the breakroom but are going to be soooo bad anyway/that one guy going on and on about his portion control tactics and how he eats 1 piece of fruit for breakfast and is then stuffed all day, when I am just trying to get a damn cup of coffee in peace. I am so sick of hearing about people's diets, I could vomit.


Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: RyanAtTanagra on March 21, 2019, 09:55:46 AM
To prove wrong all the people that said it couldn't be done.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 21, 2019, 10:08:06 AM
I am so sick of hearing about people's diets, I could vomit.

Sounds like some great dieting advice.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Luck12 on March 21, 2019, 10:36:28 AM
Another sort of petty thing.  I have to interview people today and then there's the interviews debrief meeting after (I pretty much just shooting the shit with the candidates b/c my last day is next week, then FIRED!) Therefore, I can't watch all these NCAA games.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: TexasRunner on March 21, 2019, 10:41:46 AM
Another sort of petty thing.  I have to interview people today and then there's the interviews debrief meeting after (I pretty much just shooting the shit with the candidates b/c my last day is next week, then FIRED!) Therefore, I can't watch all these NCAA games.   

Tell them that you're retiring early and they could too....  It would have been nice if I had heard that at 22.  (Assuming that the interviewees are straight-out-of-college).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: NomadMonad on March 21, 2019, 10:56:52 AM
I really don't like the aesthetic that my industry strives for.  (I'm a software engineer.)

Everything has to be brightly colored with cutesy little logos and cutesy little names like "herringLy" or "toadstool.JS" or something.  And it all has to be built in an open, wall-less "collaboration space", so that we can be "Agile" or "Lean" or whatever the trendiest synonym for "small and fast" is.

I actually liked the image of software companies I grew up with in the late 90s - they looked like serious professionals creating reliable, proven tools.  Whether that reflected reality, I'm not sure, but at least they looked the part.

Nowadays even decades-old billion-dollar multinational corporations are trying to look like week-old startups running out of someone's garage.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 21, 2019, 11:12:48 AM
I really don't like the aesthetic that my industry strives for.  (I'm a software engineer.)

Everything has to be brightly colored with cutesy little logos and cutesy little names like "herringLy" or "toadstool.JS" or something.  And it all has to be built in an open, wall-less "collaboration space", so that we can be "Agile" or "Lean" or whatever the trendiest synonym for "small and fast" is.

I actually liked the image of software companies I grew up with in the late 90s - they looked like serious professionals creating reliable, proven tools.  Whether that reflected reality, I'm not sure, but at least they looked the part.

Nowadays even decades-old billion-dollar multinational corporations are trying to look like week-old startups running out of someone's garage.

I hope the trend of naming shit that ends in "-ly" dies a quick but painful death.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Steeze on March 21, 2019, 12:03:12 PM
Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!

Ya'll should be happy that your employer provides coffee, even if it's bad.  I was a federal employee, and free coffee was explicitly banned as part of the "waste, fraud, and abuse" campaign.  Apparently it was considered illegal "extra" compensation for all of those "overpaid" federal workers.

Amazing how we can bitch about free stuff, right?  I think that's a sign that the coffee itself isn't really the problem, and that people who are unhappy in their jobs will complain about anything.

After your previous comment about considering what we would miss about work I thought of this exact thing. I will miss the free coffee that is ready at the press of a button. FWIW half the office chooses to buy fancy ice coffee for $4+ instead of the good free stuff. I will also miss the unlimited use of a quality scanner, printer, plotter and paper shredder. My workstation is also very fast and has expensive software on it which is nice. ... really though most of those things are not needed unless I am consulting or something, so no real point in owning them.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mississippi Mudstache on March 21, 2019, 12:09:31 PM
Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!

Ya'll should be happy that your employer provides coffee, even if it's bad.  I was a federal employee, and free coffee was explicitly banned as part of the "waste, fraud, and abuse" campaign.  Apparently it was considered illegal "extra" compensation for all of those "overpaid" federal workers.

Amazing how we can bitch about free stuff, right?  I think that's a sign that the coffee itself isn't really the problem, and that people who are unhappy in their jobs will complain about anything.

After your previous comment about considering what we would miss about work I thought of this exact thing. I will miss the free coffee that is ready at the press of a button. FWIW half the office chooses to buy fancy ice coffee for $4+ instead of the good free stuff.

Yeah, this one blows my mind. We have free, expensive coffee at our office, yet one of my co-workers shows up every morning with a cup from Dunkin Donuts or the local gas station. I don't get it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Arbitrage on March 21, 2019, 12:27:09 PM
Status reports.  Status meetings.  Roll up the status into another meeting, with another presentation.  More status.  I despise having to type up and meet on this crap just to justify the existence of several layers of management. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FreeBear on March 21, 2019, 12:34:49 PM
Awesome thread! 

I FIRE'd 4 years ago.  I'm glad to no longer get "invited" to the annual holiday party.  I also resented being stuck in the office with perfect sunny and 70F weather outside.  It's only really nice at most 3-4 months around here, and I'd climb the walls when stuck at w*rk in good weather.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FreeBear on March 21, 2019, 12:36:33 PM
Oh, I forgot a few...

Got tired to kissing ass...

Actually, much worse that the w*rk itself, was the entire process of finding a j*b.   I hated the anxiety and, well, the huge amount of effort required.  I think it is worse now.  Back in the day, it involved snail mailing dozens or even hundreds of paper cover letters and resumes printed on "special" paper.  Now I hear it can involve hours completing online applications, one for each and every position.  I'm just glad I no longer depend on w*rk to pay the bills.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on March 21, 2019, 01:51:00 PM
Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!

Ya'll should be happy that your employer provides coffee, even if it's bad.  I was a federal employee, and free coffee was explicitly banned as part of the "waste, fraud, and abuse" campaign.  Apparently it was considered illegal "extra" compensation for all of those "overpaid" federal workers.

Amazing how we can bitch about free stuff, right?  I think that's a sign that the coffee itself isn't really the problem, and that people who are unhappy in their jobs will complain about anything.

Oh no.
I had to pay for the shitty burnt-popcorn coffee.
It was the only option until I smuggled a Mr. Coffee into my lab, which was not at all okay in terms of workplace safety rules.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Luck12 on March 21, 2019, 01:55:11 PM

Tell them that you're retiring early and they could too....  It would have been nice if I had heard that at 22.  (Assuming that the interviewees are straight-out-of-college).

LOL I mentioned it and one of them referenced MMM, says he knows all about it.  Aw yeah.  One of them thanked me for not doing the standard interview.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on March 21, 2019, 02:07:27 PM
I am so sick of hearing about people's diets, I could vomit.

Sounds like some great dieting advice.

Yeah, right up there with the guy at work who, overhearing someone in the breakroom talking about food allergies, said, "wow, I WISH I had a food allergy, maybe then I'd be able to lose weight!"
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: TexasRunner on March 21, 2019, 02:15:41 PM
Tell them that you're retiring early and they could too....  It would have been nice if I had heard that at 22.  (Assuming that the interviewees are straight-out-of-college).
LOL I mentioned it and one of them referenced MMM, says he knows all about it.  Aw yeah.  One of them thanked me for not doing the standard interview.   

LOL thats great.  I recently had a series of 'non-standard' interviews and getting dinner while talking about job prospects is MUCH nicer than the normal 'sit in front of a panel' bullshit.

In hindsight I have done 3 interviews so far totaling over 7 hours, and none of it was the 'what is your greatest weakness' bs.  Just people trying to figure out if things are a good fit.  Then again, sales has its own little set of rules and I'm betting that those type of interviews weed out the wheat from the chaff better than more technically-focused interviews.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SAR on March 21, 2019, 02:50:12 PM
I'm loving this thread . . .

It also reminds me of how incredibly good I have it, working at a university in a very nice area. Pension starts at 50, and I have tax deferred 403b and 457 accounts. I just wish I took that stuff seriously when I started at 29.

The thing about my job is that it is an area of academia that is 'proto-scientific'. . . the result is that I have a lot of colleagues who work 80+ hour weeks year round pumping out derivative non-sense.

Then we collectively review people's work to propose pay increases, which means we basically count their publications. Everyone knows that everyone knows the basic process:

"OMG, what a lot of shit so-and-so has published. Yes, but look how MUCH THERE IS!!!"

It appears that this fact about the field attracts small minds with massive egos. When you hear someone talk about a colleagues, it's invariably "so-and-so has X publications, wow!". It's never, wow, so-and-so discovered X! No one cares, it's just the social ranking brownie points of counting publications.

I checked out of the game about a decade ago when I learned that not only were people deeply narcissistic, some who I foolishly trusted are also Machiavellian--working to undermine one another behind the scenes.

Then I learned about MMM about 5 years ago. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on March 21, 2019, 03:23:30 PM
I am so sick of hearing about people's diets, I could vomit.

Sounds like some great dieting advice.

Yeah, right up there with the guy at work who, overhearing someone in the breakroom talking about food allergies, said, "wow, I WISH I had a food allergy, maybe then I'd be able to lose weight!"

After I spent a week in hospital with food poisoning, a relative of mine managed to say 'oh, that's an easy way to lose 10 kg!'. Sure, losing fluids from both ends at the same time, for 10 days in a row, until you end up in hospital on a drip, that's way easier than joining Weight Watchers.

I can't imagine how terrible serious food allergies are - for me that was a once in a lifetime thing (hopefully) but people with allergies get violently sick every time they accidentally eat the wrong thing.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: HBFIRE on March 21, 2019, 03:28:59 PM
I was always super envious of those who were genuinely "all cattle no hat"/"stealth wealth".  For some reason on a superficial level this was always super appealing to me, being secretly wealthy without anyone knowing.  I guess that was my pettiest motivator.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on March 21, 2019, 04:13:00 PM
Yea, I highly recommend retirement to all of you peeps.  Just reading this thread is stressing me out, reminding me of what my old life was like.  It genuinely does get better, I promise.

I too used to make lists of the things I hated.  The reasons I needed to quit, the injustices and idiocy and the repetitive bullshit work that didn't need to exist, but in retrospect that was just me wallowing in self-pity.  Looking back on it now, that version of me feels angry and cruel.  There's just no reason to live like that.

Maybe a more helpful exercise is to identify the things that you think you will miss about your job, the good things, and then make a plan for how to preserve as much of that as possible after you retire.

There actually was a thread about what people who were FIRE missed about work, and the overwhelming response seemed to be either nothing or something trivial.  Not very encouraging for this idea. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on March 21, 2019, 06:10:32 PM
Another petty reason for wanting to FIRE - I want the time to cook sourdough bread properly.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: BuildingFrugalHabits on March 21, 2019, 07:16:13 PM
^ Couldn't you just fire them? I had a job the was 24/7 365 days/year with holidays on and working outdoors in any kind of weather and weird conditions. It was all clearly spelled out and if they refused they were terminated.

My petty reasons to FIRE was to play beach volleyball and hang with my dogs and cats.

That's not a petty reason but a pretty good one if you ask me!  I fantasize about skiing, hitting the climbing gym every morning trading off climbs with the older retirees and sipping coffee between turns and yes mid-morning walks/hikes with my dog!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: NorthernMonkey on March 22, 2019, 12:57:54 AM
My Dog looks so sad when I leave him in the morning. I want to FIRE so my dog doesn't look so sad
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on March 22, 2019, 01:59:11 AM
My Dog looks so sad when I leave him in the morning. I want to FIRE so my dog doesn't look so sad

We are getting dogs when we FIRE. We grew up with dogs and miss having them so much, but we're away so much that it would be cruel to get a dog now.

Until this thread I didn't fully realise how many petty things take all the joy from my working life. I really need to focus on my side hustle which is much more fun.

Strange enough, the big annoying things at work (like people asking my advice, don't listen to it, run into problems, then ask me for a quick fix) don't annoy me as much. That's what I was hired for, I get paid for that. Drinking awful coffee and listening to terrible music, no one told me about that when I was hired...

I keep instant coffee in my desk drawer now, so I've sort of solved the coffee problem. It's not great coffee but I can drink it without weird facial expressions.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: jojoguy on March 22, 2019, 03:43:15 AM
Being able to quit my job with a smile on my face. Honestly, it probably wouldn't play out that way. I would probably give a months notice in order to help my bosses establish a replacement.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Slow&Steady on March 22, 2019, 06:53:37 AM
Normally I try to focus on the positive but I am feeling grumpy today and this seems like a fun game at the moment.

1. So I no longer have to listen to excuses about why people can not travel or work a longer day because they have to pickup or drop off their kid. We explain in detail exactly what is required and yet for some reason they accept the position and suddenly after being hired they remember that they have a kid.....

2. I want a dog but I am a responsible person and realize that with my current position I can not be home to let the dog out or give them the proper attention meanwhile I listen to my co-workers give lame excuses about why they can not work a longer day or travel because they have to let the dog out or feed it or whatever.

3. I am so tired of having to interface and rely on people that do not give a damn, are complacent or just do as little as humanly possible without getting fired.


So I don't have to interface with people that think working late and traveling for work are more important than spending time with my family.  You want 1 long day every few weeks, fine.  You want me to travel out of state every other month, ok.  You ask me to travel 3 hours away for a Friday/Saturday/Sunday "test the equipment" (that can be done remotely) trip after I get home from from a week long trip at 11PM on Thursday, F*** you.

True petty reason is that I hate alarm clocks and dress clothes.
I get it but we explained in detail the exact duties and hours of the position and asked the person point blank if they could accommodate that schedule and they said no problem I need the money and welcome the overtime.

About 4 hours after they were hired they said oh I can not do that despite the fact that they said no problem just a few days earlier.

If you can not travel do not apply for a position that clearly states 50% travel. If you can not work the required hours and travel the amount that we were up front about do not lie and say you can.

Is it really asking too much for someone to be upfront and honest when we were upfront and honest with them?

Sent from my Pixel 2 XL using Tapatalk

I guess the upfront and honest part is what is key.

I took a new job last year that did not state anything about travel in the ad.  I was in the very last round of interview with the very last interviewer when I was asked if I was okay with the travel component.  "Um, I am not sure, how much travel are you talking about?"  "Oh, you will need to go the the facilities every once in a while."

Last fall I asked them to clarify how much travel they are actually expecting from me, the response I got was you will need to go to X facility every other month and Y facility on the opposite months (Y facility is only 2-3 hours away and can be done in a day trip).  Now I have also been asked to book flights to 3 additional locations in the next 2 months... plus potentially go do this weekend testing crap. My baby turns 1 this weekend, I did not agree to week long travel multiple times a month when I accepted this job.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on March 22, 2019, 07:58:56 AM
Travel is probably my favorite part of my job. I love my wife and child, but a break every now and then is nice. I always stay at a nice hotel that is never more than 15 minutes from where I'll be working that week. I have a gym on site; I get at least one free meal per day (sometimes two depending on the hotel); and I get a nice paycheck to go with it. Also, my travel is always within the state and is always Monday-Thursday, so I get a long weekend after.

I wish I could do it a little more than a few times per year- maybe once per month.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 22, 2019, 07:59:51 AM
The office coffee always tastes burnt, even if I make it fresh and even after we bought a new machine.  How?

Does it have a warmer pan you can't turn off? Or that always seems to be left on so that when the pot is empty the last bit crusts to the bottom and it gets all smokey?

It's a mystery.  We bought a new, uncrusted machine 2 weeks ago, and even if I make it with the exact proportions I like, and serve myself right away, it's still burnt.  The best I can do is water it down. I literally fill my mug with water, microwave it to the right temp, and add a few dribbles of coffee until the color looks right. 

It might be the coffee itself, but we rotate brands and they all taste weird.  I started using a french press exclusively at home, and I have one particular kind I get at Costco that I am in love with, so maybe I'm just a snob now *shrugs*
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on March 22, 2019, 08:08:52 AM
Oh! I know exactly the coffee you are talking about!

Ya'll should be happy that your employer provides coffee, even if it's bad.  I was a federal employee, and free coffee was explicitly banned as part of the "waste, fraud, and abuse" campaign.  Apparently it was considered illegal "extra" compensation for all of those "overpaid" federal workers.

Hear hear. I work for the Canadian federal government, and *any* non-work-essential perks aren't allowed to be free. We have to pay if we want burnt coffee.

I've given it some thought, and I can't think of any petty reasons for wanting FIRE - all of mine seem pretty reasonable to me (freedom of time, pursuing work that's interesting but low/non paying, etc.). Keep the pettiness coming!

I don't know.  I've had four jobs that provide coffee - two free, two paid.  The coffee at the paid places was between 10-25 cents a mug and it was always better.  Always.  The beans were always decent because we shared the cost and it was ground daily.  I guess you get what you pay for.

My new petty reason to FIRE is so people can't tell me things like "you are lucky to have your job, because...." ;) j/k Sol
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Physicsteacher on March 22, 2019, 08:20:11 AM
My horrible boss sends a weekly update that includes a countdown of days until he retires. He's in his early fifties and planning to retire at 65. I'm almost two decades younger and should be free before he is, even while making half his salary.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on March 22, 2019, 08:24:33 AM
My new petty reason to FIRE is so people can't tell me things like "you are lucky to have your job, because...." ;) j/k Sol

I do not miss having an office job, but I sometimes think about my old office coworkers.  These are people that I basically never saw outside of work environments, yet I used to talk to them every damn day.  I knew all about their kids, their health issues, their financial situations, their weird food preferences, everything.  Now, they're just gone.

I've made new friends in retirement, of course, but it's kind of like starting over.  And you don't have the daily opportunity to interact with the same people, when you're not obligated to go to the same place every day.  That can be a good thing, if you found your coworkers annoying, but also a potential drawback for people that you liked.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ender on March 22, 2019, 08:25:05 AM
My horrible boss sends a weekly update that includes a countdown of days until he retires. He's in his early fifties and planning to retire at 65. I'm almost two decades younger and should be free before he is, even while making half his salary.

This sounds like Dilbert material, your boss actually says something like 5000 days until retirement?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Physicsteacher on March 22, 2019, 08:27:28 AM
My horrible boss sends a weekly update that includes a countdown of days until he retires. He's in his early fifties and planning to retire at 65. I'm almost two decades younger and should be free before he is, even while making half his salary.

This sounds like Dilbert material, your boss actually says something like 5000 days until retirement?

Every single week.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: E.T. on March 22, 2019, 08:33:20 AM
My petty reason to FIRE is that sometimes I'm just really lazy and want to be able to sleep in and lounge around. Oh and I want to be able to wear fun sundresses all the time without worrying about people at work taking me seriously or being creepy. I hate my boring office clothes but they serve their purpose very well. People at work have told me I'm intimidating (it's a good quality in my office) but it's hilarious to my husband who sees me as I am in my flouncy dresses on the weekend. I'm secretly a silly, young and frivolous softie under my no-nonsense, engineer exterior.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: TexasRunner on March 22, 2019, 08:51:23 AM
My horrible boss sends a weekly update that includes a countdown of days until he retires. He's in his early fifties and planning to retire at 65. I'm almost two decades younger and should be free before he is, even while making half his salary.

This sounds like Dilbert material, your boss actually says something like 5000 days until retirement?

Every single week.

I'll bet he dies before he gets there.  There is good material for a tragedy (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tragedy) script somewhere in there...

(Link is to make sure people know I'm talking about a play, not that I wish that dude would die...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: BussoV6 on March 22, 2019, 08:56:50 AM
To give my cats a better life ;)

That's not petty at all, it's rather noble.

Petty would be me having to put on a shirt for a webex with video.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on March 22, 2019, 09:51:24 AM
My Dog looks so sad when I leave him in the morning. I want to FIRE so my dog doesn't look so sad

I saw my cat staring forlornly out the window as I left today. That about broke my heart. :( Even though I know that probably 5 minutes later she was happily playing or destroying something or bopping her brother in the head.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: thesis on March 22, 2019, 09:51:39 AM
I hate LinkedIn. I only keep it out of the fear that I may need it to network for another job if I fall upon difficult times. Ironically enough, I have never gotten a job through LinkedIn or any of my connections on it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on March 22, 2019, 10:07:32 AM
My Dog looks so sad when I leave him in the morning. I want to FIRE so my dog doesn't look so sad

I saw my cat staring forlornly out the window as I left today. That about broke my heart. :( Even though I know that probably 5 minutes later she was happily playing or destroying something or bopping her brother in the head.

Yeah, we were saying the same thing earlier in the thread.  I don't think this is petty at all. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Blissful Biker on March 22, 2019, 10:19:20 AM
When I get captured by a good book, which I often do, I want to stay up all night to finish it!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FrugalToque on March 22, 2019, 10:57:26 AM
I'd like to spend more time with my Lego, to be honest.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: accountingteacher on March 22, 2019, 11:03:09 AM
To prove wrong all the people that said it couldn't be done.

This!  I want my very existence to scream 'I TOLD YOU SO!'
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on March 22, 2019, 11:05:54 AM
When I get captured by a good book, which I often do, I want to stay up all night to finish it!

+1 !
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on March 22, 2019, 11:06:23 AM
I want to masturbate during the day.

What's stopping you?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MrThatsDifferent on March 22, 2019, 11:15:42 AM
I want to masturbate during the day.

What's stopping you?

Linda in HR apparently.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Padonak on March 22, 2019, 11:16:05 AM
I want to masturbate during the day. I will fight anyone who calls this petty, but it's definitely selfish.
You can do it at work too, lol.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on March 22, 2019, 11:30:00 AM
The SITTING. The constant SITTING. I hate it! I make sure I get up and walk around once an hour at least, even if it's just to go to the ladies' (I drink lots of coffee and water just to have the excuse, honestly), and on days that I can take a lunch break and it's not miserable out I make sure to get in a lunchtime walk, but I'm getting increasingly creaky and stiff.

I've considered requesting a standing desk but I don't think my company would pay for it, and honestly, the problem is being stationary, not just sitting. The ability to move around whenever I want is worth so much to me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: jps on March 22, 2019, 11:40:39 AM
The SITTING. The constant SITTING. I hate it! I make sure I get up and walk around once an hour at least, even if it's just to go to the ladies' (I drink lots of coffee and water just to have the excuse, honestly), and on days that I can take a lunch break and it's not miserable out I make sure to get in a lunchtime walk, but I'm getting increasingly creaky and stiff.

I've considered requesting a standing desk but I don't think my company would pay for it, and honestly, the problem is being stationary, not just sitting. The ability to move around whenever I want is worth so much to me.

Having a standing desk makes it much easier to move/wiggle around, even though you aren't walking. I do lots of stretches and other weird stuff.

Source: Am standing desk wiggler.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: tipster350 on March 22, 2019, 11:54:54 AM
I want to masturbate during the day.

What's stopping you?

Linda in HR apparently.

I needed this laugh very badly. Thank you!

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Slow&Steady on March 22, 2019, 12:08:02 PM
When I get captured by a good book, which I often do, I want to stay up all night to finish it!

+1 !

Another +1

When I was younger I would stay up all night and finish the book, then go to work.  I need my sleep in order to function too much now.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on March 22, 2019, 12:40:33 PM
The SITTING. The constant SITTING. I hate it! I make sure I get up and walk around once an hour at least, even if it's just to go to the ladies' (I drink lots of coffee and water just to have the excuse, honestly), and on days that I can take a lunch break and it's not miserable out I make sure to get in a lunchtime walk, but I'm getting increasingly creaky and stiff.

I've considered requesting a standing desk but I don't think my company would pay for it, and honestly, the problem is being stationary, not just sitting. The ability to move around whenever I want is worth so much to me.

Look no further than that:
https://www.ecosia.org/images?q=walking+desk&tt=mzl2

Also the books, yeah!!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on March 22, 2019, 12:59:33 PM
I want to live in a more quiet world. I experience it today on my free Fridays. Quiet roads, quiet parking lots, quiet shops, readonably quiet ski tracks. So much nicer than the usual crowded world.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: NorthernMonkey on March 22, 2019, 01:18:14 PM
The SITTING. The constant SITTING. I hate it! I make sure I get up and walk around once an hour at least, even if it's just to go to the ladies' (I drink lots of coffee and water just to have the excuse, honestly), and on days that I can take a lunch break and it's not miserable out I make sure to get in a lunchtime walk, but I'm getting increasingly creaky and stiff.

I've considered requesting a standing desk but I don't think my company would pay for it, and honestly, the problem is being stationary, not just sitting. The ability to move around whenever I want is worth so much to me.

I spend a crap load of time on conference calls. A new wireless headset means I can wander within about 10m of my desk while listing to inane crap
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on March 22, 2019, 01:35:15 PM
Ooooo, I would LOVE this! I too have to spent time on many webexes involving inane crap that doesn't even have much to do with me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on March 22, 2019, 04:09:08 PM
I want to masturbate during the day. I will fight anyone who calls this petty, but it's definitely selfish.
You can do it at work too, lol.

I quit instead, it's easier than trying to get in the mood when surrounded by my coworkers.

I read this after reading the comment about a standing desk above. Perhaps there is a market for a laying down desk? Itf so it may be easier for you to fulfill your desires at work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: markbike528CBX on March 22, 2019, 07:45:37 PM
I want to masturbate during the day. I will fight anyone who calls this point petty, but it's definitely selfish.
You can do it at work too, lol.

I quit instead, it's easier than trying to get in the mood when surrounded by my coworkers.

I read this after reading the comment about a standing desk above. Perhaps there is a market for a laying down desk? Itf so it may be easier for you to fulfill your desires at work.

When SemiBigCorp first did a job in France, the Americans could NOT stop giggling at the Salle de Repose ( resting room) complete with chaise lounges. We never went in, nor did we ask what transpired in there. Eventually, the setups stopped having a Salle de Repose.

That said I have snoozed in a horizontal table, on company time.  Not tempted to do anything untoward, as it was understood to have TV monitors, as it was potentially claustrophobic. Reason? Gamma chest count for plutonium. Place? The iron or copper rooms at the in vivo testing facility.

On topic: I wanted to lounge in the pool all summer, not in a cubicle.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: mrs sideways on March 22, 2019, 10:42:39 PM
I can't wait for the ability to control the thermostat, specifically the AC.  In summers here I'm dressing for 80F for the drive to work and bringing sweaters and layers to survive 65F in the office. It's insane! Not to mention wasteful!

Oh god, that one person who always sets the thermostat in defiance of the weather: super hot in the winter and super cold in the summer. It's probable that WEEKS of my energy savings at home were being offset in an hour at the office... ugh.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: PhilB on March 23, 2019, 08:04:37 AM
Socks.  I never want to have to wear socks in the summer again.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Budgie on March 23, 2019, 11:57:59 AM
I am reading a lot of not remotely petty reasons for seeking FIRE in this thread. So, I will go ahead and reveal the petty truth:

I am too old for early retirement and don't really want to retire because I like my work. But I am frugal/saving at a FIRE-seeking rate so I can have a warm snugly feeling as the person who was sabotaging my financial life for two decades continues to circle the financial drain. Smug superiority = super petty. So as far as this thread goes, I think I win!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Jantoven on March 23, 2019, 01:31:30 PM
This thread made me laugh, in part because I can relate to so many aspects of this.

My job honestly isn't a bad job, but there are certainly annoyances that I cannot wait to escape.

The worst ones for me:

1.  Countless meetings in which nothing is really solved
2.  Sitting in a cubicle next to an incredibly arrogant dude who so desperately wants constant adulation that he insists on telling everyone around him how smart he is, what a great father he is, how he's the perfect husband, etc..
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Cellista on March 23, 2019, 09:18:03 PM
I don't want to EVER have to ride the Washington metro again. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: whywork on March 23, 2019, 10:36:30 PM
go to a coffee shop and watch others rush for their work while I calmly sip my coffee knowing that I have to go back to home and watch that netflix rerun
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: NorthernMonkey on March 24, 2019, 01:22:00 AM
Ooooo, I would LOVE this! I too have to spent time on many webexes involving inane crap that doesn't even have much to do with me.

Check with your EvilGlobalMegaCorp IT dept if you can bring your own headset in. Mine is a Jabra Evolve 65. It has a little dongle that plugs into the computers USB port, so it appears like a normal wired headset to the pc, but Im not attached.

It also enables unlimited spinning round in your chair while on said conference calls
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Anette on March 24, 2019, 03:09:56 AM
The organisations ( Church) model: "Im Mittelpunkt der Mensch" translating to " the focus is on humans" when clearly the focus is on MONEY
This hypocrisy really annoys me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on March 24, 2019, 10:29:51 AM
At 6.5 years post-FIRE, work is so far in my rearview mirror that I've managed to purge a lot of the petty shit from memory. I sure as hell don't want to dredge it up again, so I'll just live vicariously through the comments on this thread.

I do remember working a retail job during my gap year. An older woman said, "I'm waiting for my morning break, I'm waiting for my lunch break, I'm waiting for my afternoon break. I don't want to wish my life away." It had a huge impact on me, as did a bout with cancer a couple of years later. Sure, there was plenty of petty shit along the way that reinforced my desire to seek FIRE, but the die was cast early on. So long ago that the term FIRE didn't

Tl;Dr - PTF.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MissNancyPryor on March 24, 2019, 10:46:35 AM
I will giggle to myself often at the thought of NOT going on meaningless, multi-day work trips to locations across the country. 

I am giggling as I write this knowing I am never going to get on an airplane for that company again -- last day is April 5th and I already refused a trip between my notice day and that end point. 

Can you believe they actually wanted me to fly 5 hours one way to some stupid meeting during my 3 weeks notice?  When they knew I had quit?  WTAF!  It is like an addiction they had to commanding I run around for them and they hadn't considered that perhaps that is not a good use of anyone's resources. 

Felt so good to say no.  Just nope. 

Ahhhhh....  tee hee!  I knew this would feel good but I am surprised at how much.  I wonder how long this high will last, but I bet a long, long time. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: whywork on March 24, 2019, 12:04:16 PM
I will giggle to myself often at the thought of NOT going on meaningless, multi-day work trips to locations across the country. 

I am giggling as I write this knowing I am never going to get on an airplane for that company again -- last day is April 5th and I already refused a trip between my notice day and that end point. 

Can you believe they actually wanted me to fly 5 hours one way to some stupid meeting during my 3 weeks notice?  When they knew I had quit?  WTAF!  It is like an addiction they had to commanding I run around for them and they hadn't considered that perhaps that is not a good use of anyone's resources. 

Felt so good to say no.  Just nope. 

Ahhhhh....  tee hee!  I knew this would feel good but I am surprised at how much.  I wonder how long this high will last, but I bet a long, long time.

I hate those last days of work after you give notice; they feel free to mistreat you however. I personally avoid giving notice if I could
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: pbkmaine on March 24, 2019, 12:38:34 PM
I will giggle to myself often at the thought of NOT going on meaningless, multi-day work trips to locations across the country. 

I am giggling as I write this knowing I am never going to get on an airplane for that company again -- last day is April 5th and I already refused a trip between my notice day and that end point. 

Can you believe they actually wanted me to fly 5 hours one way to some stupid meeting during my 3 weeks notice?  When they knew I had quit?  WTAF!  It is like an addiction they had to commanding I run around for them and they hadn't considered that perhaps that is not a good use of anyone's resources. 

Felt so good to say no.  Just nope. 

Ahhhhh....  tee hee!  I knew this would feel good but I am surprised at how much.  I wonder how long this high will last, but I bet a long, long time.

I hate those last days of work after you give notice; they feel free to mistreat you however. I personally avoid giving notice if I could

I was working for a large accounting firm and gave two weeks notice to go to a direct competitor. Normally they would have walked me out the door. But no, they wanted me to spend two weeks reviewing highly sensitive internal documents that would have given me new insights into how to compete with them. When I pointed this out, they changed their minds.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MissNancyPryor on March 24, 2019, 03:55:36 PM
I remember on Dr. Doom's blog (livingafi.com) he was scolded by some dork in HR for not attending training during his notice period.  When Doom pointed out he wouldn't be around to use the thing they were trying to train him for, HR dork said they would take it up with Doom's manager. 

Maybe there is a low grade poison gas being piped into the HVAC systems of all MegaCorps, killing brain cells daily. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireLane on March 24, 2019, 04:06:36 PM
Can you believe they actually wanted me to fly 5 hours one way to some stupid meeting during my 3 weeks notice?  When they knew I had quit?  WTAF!  It is like an addiction they had to commanding I run around for them and they hadn't considered that perhaps that is not a good use of anyone's resources. 

Felt so good to say no.  Just nope. 

WTF! The notice period is supposed to be for you to document your duties and train your successors, not so they can squeeze as much work as possible from you before you're out the door. Do they not understand that? Good on you for refusing!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Just Joe on March 24, 2019, 09:50:47 PM
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"
Friday: "Are you up to anything fun this weekend?"
Monday: "How was your weekend?"


I will never ask about anyones weekend ever, nor answer a question about my weekend, when I FIRE.

+1 for weekend interrogations. It's nobody's business to ask what I do in the weekend. If I have something to tell, I will do so by myself.

I have a coworker that spends the first half of the day repeating their stories from the evening or weekend before to everyone that comes by. Over and over I get to hear a long version.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on March 25, 2019, 02:26:50 AM
I remember on Dr. Doom's blog (livingafi.com) he was scolded by some dork in HR for not attending training during his notice period.  When Doom pointed out he wouldn't be around to use the thing they were trying to train him for, HR dork said they would take it up with Doom's manager. 

Maybe there is a low grade poison gas being piped into the HVAC systems of all MegaCorps, killing brain cells daily.

And what can they do if you don't meet up on meaningless training events? Fire you?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on March 25, 2019, 02:29:09 AM
I hate those last days of work after you give notice; they feel free to mistreat you however. I personally avoid giving notice if I could

We have a terrible 3 months! I hope that this time, I can take up my summer vacation at the end (5 weeks). But I have no legal right to take that up outside summer. We'll have to see how that works out.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on March 25, 2019, 02:50:18 AM
I remember on Dr. Doom's blog (livingafi.com) he was scolded by some dork in HR for not attending training during his notice period.  When Doom pointed out he wouldn't be around to use the thing they were trying to train him for, HR dork said they would take it up with Doom's manager. 

Maybe there is a low grade poison gas being piped into the HVAC systems of all MegaCorps, killing brain cells daily.

And what can they do if you don't meet up on meaningless training events? Fire you?
Yes. Of course. If you don't uphold your part of the contract they can fire you, meaning you don't get money for the "notice time" and may suffer other disadvantages later (can't say about the US, but in Germany, if you caused being fired you don't get money from the state for 3 month. I would be bloody surprised if the US does not do something like that.)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bloop Bloop on March 25, 2019, 04:11:02 AM
In my industry usually once you give notice that you're resigning, they tell you to resign immediately and pay you 4 weeks' pay but specify that you cannot work for those 4 weeks. This prevents you from affecting morale at the firm you're leaving but also prevents you from actively helping the firm you're joining.

On another note, I've never met anyone from HR who wasn't deeply mediocre.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Trifele on March 25, 2019, 05:55:39 AM
I remember on Dr. Doom's blog (livingafi.com) he was scolded by some dork in HR for not attending training during his notice period.  When Doom pointed out he wouldn't be around to use the thing they were trying to train him for, HR dork said they would take it up with Doom's manager. 

Maybe there is a low grade poison gas being piped into the HVAC systems of all MegaCorps, killing brain cells daily.

OMG, this.  A friend of mine at work gave notice right before MegaCorp takeover.  She was only going to be there two weeks after the takeover, and they made her sit through three days of HR meetings on policies and procedures.

The kicker is that she was a specialized mission-critical person with knowledge no one else had.  Uh, MegaCorp -- do you think maybe you should have sent your best and brightest from HQ to spend time with this person instead?  Might have been a better use of the time?   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on March 25, 2019, 08:27:59 AM
MegaCorp doesn't think logically on an individual basis.  All that matters is overall policy for the giant machine.  No disention allowed, unless you receive sign-offs and approvals through at least 5 levels up the management chain.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MissNancyPryor on March 25, 2019, 08:32:17 AM
I remember on Dr. Doom's blog (livingafi.com) he was scolded by some dork in HR for not attending training during his notice period.  When Doom pointed out he wouldn't be around to use the thing they were trying to train him for, HR dork said they would take it up with Doom's manager. 

Maybe there is a low grade poison gas being piped into the HVAC systems of all MegaCorps, killing brain cells daily.

And what can they do if you don't meet up on meaningless training events? Fire you?
Yes. Of course. If you don't uphold your part of the contract they can fire you, meaning you don't get money for the "notice time" and may suffer other disadvantages later (can't say about the US, but in Germany, if you caused being fired you don't get money from the state for 3 month. I would be bloody surprised if the US does not do something like that.)

Fortunately no such contract situation here.  The worst thing they will do is feel butt hurt that they no longer control me.  Habits die hard.  Snert.

My last boss called me Friday and said, "Congratulations!  And if I may, F you."  hahahahahaha

A little peek behind the curtain on that one.   

Another happy thing-  I got my Sundays back.  This weekend was the first one in YEARS that I did not have a shadow over me on Sunday, hanging with work dread.  Even though I still have 2 weeks left that feeling vanished.  Amazing. 

Furthermore, I was supposed to be at work an hour ago and seem to have completely forgotten where I put my remaining fucks to give.  Huh.  Fresh out I guess. 

Bwwahahahahahahahaha!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: tipster350 on March 25, 2019, 09:33:18 AM
I want to put "RETIRED, B!TCHES" in my LinkedIn profile for a period of one month, and then delete/deactivate my profile forever. Never go to the site again.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on March 25, 2019, 10:31:46 AM
go to a coffee shop and watch others rush for their work while I calmly sip my coffee knowing that I have to go back to home and watch that netflix rerun

For some reason this reminded me of a post I saw a while back.  I don't remember who or what thread, but she said she would set an alarm in the morning just so she could laugh and turn it off.  So cruel. 

Laughing at all the people fighting morning traffic before nodding back off is a decently petty reason. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on March 25, 2019, 11:26:37 AM
go to a coffee shop and watch others rush for their work while I calmly sip my coffee knowing that I have to go back to home and watch that netflix rerun

For some reason this reminded me of a post I saw a while back.  I don't remember who or what thread, but she said she would set an alarm in the morning just so she could laugh and turn it off.  So cruel. 

Laughing at all the people fighting morning traffic before nodding back off is a decently petty reason.
But its a f***ing good one :D
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on March 25, 2019, 11:34:40 AM
go to a coffee shop and watch others rush for their work while I calmly sip my coffee knowing that I have to go back to home and watch that netflix rerun

For some reason this reminded me of a post I saw a while back.  I don't remember who or what thread, but she said she would set an alarm in the morning just so she could laugh and turn it off.  So cruel. 

Laughing at all the people fighting morning traffic before nodding back off is a decently petty reason.
But its a f***ing good one :D
Ha, I experienced a version of this today. Now that my broken bones have healed, I scheduled an 8:30 walk with my long-lost walking partner. The alarm went off at 8:00. I thought I had hit the snooze button, but apparently I had shut it off, which I did not realize until 8:25. Oops!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Just Joe on March 25, 2019, 11:51:55 AM
I will giggle to myself often at the thought of NOT going on meaningless, multi-day work trips to locations across the country. 

I am giggling as I write this knowing I am never going to get on an airplane for that company again -- last day is April 5th and I already refused a trip between my notice day and that end point. 

Can you believe they actually wanted me to fly 5 hours one way to some stupid meeting during my 3 weeks notice?  When they knew I had quit?  WTAF!  It is like an addiction they had to commanding I run around for them and they hadn't considered that perhaps that is not a good use of anyone's resources. 

Felt so good to say no.  Just nope. 

Ahhhhh....  tee hee!  I knew this would feel good but I am surprised at how much.  I wonder how long this high will last, but I bet a long, long time.

I'm not a flyer so I'm not in airports more than once a decade (I'm overdue now). I've wondered how many of the business people around me are actually flying to accomplish something useful that couldn't be done by video conference.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: NorthernMonkey on March 25, 2019, 12:11:50 PM

I'm not a flyer so I'm not in airports more than once a decade (I'm overdue now). I've wondered how many of the business people around me are actually flying to accomplish something useful that couldn't be done by video conference.

In my experience of flying for work (far too often) , less than 20%
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: JanetJackson on March 25, 2019, 12:23:45 PM
I will very likely never reach the RE portion of FIRE, but I might approach FI, and am in the very least attempting to fund a lifestyle change.

My heartfelt reason has already been claimed: I haaaate watching my dog watch me drive away at 7am in the front window.  I made the mistake of getting a security system recently and it has a camera.  I can log in and occasionally see her looking out the window.  She's probably just watching squirrels and farting up there on the sofa, but she might also be pining for my companionship.  Right?  :::Cries into coffee:::

My most petty reason is because I really really hate being told what to do with my time. 
Sometimes I feel like there's this huge ballooning bratty child inside of me fighting against the polite smile I use at work when I hear about something stupid/awful the organization has done, and I still have to punch in for them. 
I like working with folks who have the same vision as me, and I like working for my own vision, but I do not like working for another persons vision.  Not cool and a sad waste of my life energy. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dodojojo on March 25, 2019, 03:17:51 PM
Manager said as an exempt employee he checks his email during the weekends.  Said through gritted teeth since I didn't see his urgent weekend email until this morning.

I'm an exempt employee.

I don't know if weekend duty is petty though?  This may have to be saved for serious and legit reasons for FIRE?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: RyanAtTanagra on March 25, 2019, 03:43:33 PM
Manager said as an exempt employee he checks his email during the weekends.  Said through gritted teeth since I didn't see his urgent weekend email until this morning.

I'm an exempt employee.

I don't know if weekend duty is petty though?  This may have to be saved for serious and legit reasons for FIRE?

Email is not the proper way to get ahold of someone for an emergency.  That's what phone calls, or at least texting, is for.  As the only person in charge of my company's entire IT infrastructure (public websites included), I'm on call 24/7, but I still don't check email after hours.  It's a purposeful boundary.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dodojojo on March 25, 2019, 04:04:31 PM
Email is not the proper way to get ahold of someone for an emergency.  That's what phone calls, or at least texting, is for.  As the only person in charge of my company's entire IT infrastructure (public websites included), I'm on call 24/7, but I still don't check email after hours.  It's a purposeful boundary.

It wasn't an emergency, but urgent--needed data by the morning.  But you're right, if it was that important to him, he could have called or texted.  But he doesn't want to take responsibility and instead shifts the burden on me to comply with the megacorp code accordingly.  It seems to be the norm at my megacorp for people high up the food chain to weekend email all the time.  I just didn't think I was high enough on the food chain to participate. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on March 25, 2019, 07:09:11 PM
go to a coffee shop and watch others rush for their work while I calmly sip my coffee knowing that I have to go back to home and watch that netflix rerun

For some reason this reminded me of a post I saw a while back.  I don't remember who or what thread, but she said she would set an alarm in the morning just so she could laugh and turn it off.  So cruel. 

Laughing at all the people fighting morning traffic before nodding back off is a decently petty reason.

Setting an alarm clock early to just turn it off and laugh and go back to sleep sounds funny. If I wasn't such a non-morning person I might actually try to do that. But I don't want an alarm to mess up my morning sleep-in.

This also reminds me of paddling in an urban waterway recently. I was paddling right under an underpass around 4pm when rush hour traffic was just starting. Made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside and glad I wasn't one of the lemmings stuck in traffic.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GreenToTheCore on March 25, 2019, 08:58:59 PM
To prove wrong all the people that said it couldn't be done.

This. And then laugh internally like Yzma whenever someone mentions having to go to work instead of enjoying a beautiful summer day.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOnnI-RN3i4
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zamboni on March 25, 2019, 09:04:42 PM
My most petty reason? I don't like being told what to do . . . by anyone . . . for any reason. Most of the time that just means I'm being petty.

Basically, shooting for this: (nsfw)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdfeXqHFmPI (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdfeXqHFmPI)

edited to add the brilliant modern take by jlcollins:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eikbQPldhPY (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eikbQPldhPY)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GreenToTheCore on March 25, 2019, 09:16:45 PM
Ooooo, I would LOVE this! I too have to spent time on many webexes involving inane crap that doesn't even have much to do with me.

... It has a little dongle that plugs into the computers USB port..

Heh, heh. Dongle.   https://vimeo.com/175632481
(ignore the advertisement at the end)

Also highlights a petty reason: no more waiting 15 minutes for the meeting to start because the meeting owner didn't show up early enough to get set up properly.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zamboni on March 25, 2019, 09:23:52 PM
^Nice! Dongles are another perfectly valid petty reason for FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GreenToTheCore on March 25, 2019, 09:35:41 PM
My most petty reason? I don't like being told what to do . . . by anyone . . . for any reason. Most of the time that just means I'm being petty.

Basically, shooting for this: (nsfw)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdfeXqHFmPI (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdfeXqHFmPI)

edited to add the brilliant modern take by jlcollins:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eikbQPldhPY (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eikbQPldhPY)

Ni-ice. *tips hat*
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Anette on March 26, 2019, 02:41:29 AM
Thanks Greentothecore that cheered me up this morning😉
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: soccerluvof4 on March 26, 2019, 04:06:00 AM
I am a Lazy person that forced myself out of that comfort zone long enough!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Just Joe on March 26, 2019, 06:57:02 AM
The office coffee always tastes burnt, even if I make it fresh and even after we bought a new machine.  How?

Does it have a warmer pan you can't turn off? Or that always seems to be left on so that when the pot is empty the last bit crusts to the bottom and it gets all smokey?

It's a mystery.  We bought a new, uncrusted machine 2 weeks ago, and even if I make it with the exact proportions I like, and serve myself right away, it's still burnt.  The best I can do is water it down. I literally fill my mug with water, microwave it to the right temp, and add a few dribbles of coffee until the color looks right. 

It might be the coffee itself, but we rotate brands and they all taste weird.  I started using a french press exclusively at home, and I have one particular kind I get at Costco that I am in love with, so maybe I'm just a snob now *shrugs*

Maybe you just need a coffee filter funnel. I make my own coffee at work this way.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: pbkmaine on March 26, 2019, 07:11:35 AM
The JL Collins version:
https://youtu.be/eikbQPldhPY
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireLane on March 26, 2019, 12:08:19 PM
For some reason this reminded me of a post I saw a while back.  I don't remember who or what thread, but she said she would set an alarm in the morning just so she could laugh and turn it off.  So cruel. 

Laughing at all the people fighting morning traffic before nodding back off is a decently petty reason.

A few especially frustrating days, I've imagined setting an alarm for my post-FIRE weekdays, just so I can turn on the radio, listen to the traffic report and gloat to myself, "Poor suckers."

God, I'm petty sometimes.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: facepalm on March 30, 2019, 04:18:08 AM
^Nice! Dongles are another perfectly valid petty reason for FIRE.

so is PowerPoint.

My most petty reason? I hate meetings and I hate clocks.

I would like to FIRE so I can quit teaching. It's not the kids. It's the parents. Seriously.
God YES. What a bunch of fucking enablers and whiners today's parents are. They try and game EVERYTHING.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on March 30, 2019, 09:23:35 AM
For some reason this reminded me of a post I saw a while back.  I don't remember who or what thread, but she said she would set an alarm in the morning just so she could laugh and turn it off.  So cruel. 

Laughing at all the people fighting morning traffic before nodding back off is a decently petty reason.

A few especially frustrating days, I've imagined setting an alarm for my post-FIRE weekdays, just so I can turn on the radio, listen to the traffic report and gloat to myself, "Poor suckers."

God, I'm petty sometimes.

I would never set an alarm if I didn't have to. I relish the day when I can sleep through the night without work stress waking me up at 3:00 a.m.

And I would love to never have to live through another tax season. Tax Season? FU!

I would also love to adopt a rescue dog.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on March 30, 2019, 10:00:23 AM
I never want to hear another aggressive "GOOOOOD MORNING!!!!!" from that one co-worker who I run into in the breakroom every morning when I am just trying to get my damn coffee in peace. Jesus Christ, how can he be that unrelentingly cheerful every damned morning?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on March 30, 2019, 11:31:46 AM
I never want to hear another aggressive "GOOOOOD MORNING!!!!!" from that one co-worker who I run into in the breakroom every morning when I am just trying to get my damn coffee in peace. Jesus Christ, how can he be that unrelentingly cheerful every damned morning?

I'm totally that coworker.
It's a good thing I'm rarely in the office.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: markbike528CBX on March 30, 2019, 11:43:32 AM
I never want to hear another aggressive "GOOOOOD MORNING!!!!!" from that one co-worker who I run into in the breakroom every morning when I am just trying to get my damn coffee in peace. Jesus Christ, how can he be that unrelentingly cheerful every damned morning?

I'm totally that coworker.
It's a good thing I'm rarely in the office.

When I've been that coworker, I feel like the greeting translates to "Shields Up, Red Alert, Grumpy person inbound". 
To be clear, only one person at work got that treatment.
I once walked into a hotel for a field job, and was greeted by, "What the f$ck are doing here?"
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on March 30, 2019, 11:50:31 AM
I never want to hear another aggressive "GOOOOOD MORNING!!!!!" from that one co-worker who I run into in the breakroom every morning when I am just trying to get my damn coffee in peace. Jesus Christ, how can he be that unrelentingly cheerful every damned morning?

I'm totally that coworker.
It's a good thing I'm rarely in the office.

When I've been that coworker, I feel like the greeting translates to "Shields Up, Red Alert, Grumpy person inbound". 
To be clear, only one person at work got that treatment.
I once walked into a hotel for a field job, and was greeted by, "What the f$ck are doing here?"

I'm just genuinely really energetic at the beginning of most workdays.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on March 30, 2019, 02:19:38 PM
I used to have a coworker who would make the same joke every single morning (from a famous Dutch comedy series). I am so glad I don't work there anymore. He was a nice guy but man, I was instantly grumpy every time I heard that.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SwissMiss on March 31, 2019, 01:58:09 PM
I used to work in a modern glass/steel building in the middle of the city. We had great floor to ceiling windows all around the office building. However, when the sun came round in the afternoon, the automatic blinds would go all the way down (summer and winter). For every window. Even the ones that were in the shade. Every time, it felt like some prison door shutting down. Not only was I stuck in an office in beautiful weather, now I couldn't even SEE the beautiful weather.

I would usually go over to a panel beside the entry door and manually press the "up" button, raising the blinds to where the people working at the window could still work without the sun glaring in their screens. That lasted about an hour until the automatic mechanism would kick in again and fully lower the blinds.

Sometimes, I was stuck in awful, neverending conf calls and I couldn't do my blind-lifting trick. If I was lucky, a colleague would jump in and press the "up" button.

Now that I am FIREd I really enjoy being outdoors on sunny days and definitely do not miss being stuck in semi-darkness with artificial light.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on March 31, 2019, 02:10:07 PM
I used to work in a modern glass/steel building in the middle of the city. We had great floor to ceiling windows all around the office building. However, when the sun came round in the afternoon, the automatic blinds would go all the way down (summer and winter). For every window. Even the ones that were in the shade. Every time, it felt like some prison door shutting down. Not only was I stuck in an office in beautiful weather, now I couldn't even SEE the beautiful weather.

I would usually go over to a panel beside the entry door and manually press the "up" button, raising the blinds to where the people working at the window could still work without the sun glaring in their screens. That lasted about an hour until the automatic mechanism would kick in again and fully lower the blinds.

Sometimes, I was stuck in awful, neverending conf calls and I couldn't do my blind-lifting trick. If I was lucky, a colleague would jump in and press the "up" button.

Now that I am FIREd I really enjoy being outdoors on sunny days and definitely do not miss being stuck in semi-darkness with artificial light.

I sit in a new part of the building. When the sun shines, the blinds to down automatically on the other side. But on my side, it is reflected by the snow and glates into my screen. They don't go down automatically on my side. The manual button is on the other side of the desk group. So every day I need to walk around and press the button when my screen is getting blinded. Then I need to remember to put them up manually many hours later, otherwise they will stay down forever.

I also love natural sunlight and the outdoors and think it is a petty that we need to use blinds most of the day.

I just came back from a skiing trip at our cabin in the mountains. DH and I had both forgotten our ski glasses, but the sun was really sharp. Luckily we found some fishing glasses that cover your face well. We have been skiing in those.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on March 31, 2019, 03:00:26 PM
I used to work in a modern glass/steel building in the middle of the city. We had great floor to ceiling windows all around the office building. However, when the sun came round in the afternoon, the automatic blinds would go all the way down (summer and winter). For every window. Even the ones that were in the shade. Every time, it felt like some prison door shutting down. Not only was I stuck in an office in beautiful weather, now I couldn't even SEE the beautiful weather.
That reminds me of my school. When we got automatic blinds it was incredible how punctual they worked: When the sun vanished behind a cloud, the blinds would go down, and when the sun came out again, they would go up. (Which took about 2 loud minutes every time, too.)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on March 31, 2019, 05:46:42 PM
When we got automatic blinds it was incredible how punctuous they worked: When the sun vanished behind a cloud, the blinds would go down, and when the sun came out again, they would go up.

I do not think that words means what you think it means.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on April 01, 2019, 12:48:54 AM
When we got automatic blinds it was incredible how punctuous they worked: When the sun vanished behind a cloud, the blinds would go down, and when the sun came out again, they would go up.

I do not think that words means what you think it means.
Better now?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DeepEllumStache on April 01, 2019, 09:16:26 AM
I want to stop pretending like I'm excited by really stupid projects that will take a ridiculous number of hours of work and everyone knows will go nowhere.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on April 01, 2019, 09:23:17 AM
I want to stop pretending like I'm excited by really stupid projects that will take a ridiculous number of hours of work and everyone knows will go nowhere.

Sometimes I get to hang out with my former coworkers, outside of office hours, and it always gives me big goofy smiles when they start talking about work.  Recently, it was something like "At last week's staff meeting they unveiled new process rules for how we're supposed to route documents through..." and I just listened intently to the whole spiel with a big grin on my face and then said, "Wow, that sounds so very very... boring."  And then they all scowled at me and I laughed.

My career was good to me, for a decade, but I definitely don't miss it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: justchristine on April 01, 2019, 10:48:28 AM
I can't wait to see the look on the faces of a few people at work when I say I'm quitting and I don't have another job.  Most people at work know I'm saving for early retirement, but I'm not sure they believe me when I say how early.  There's one smug sob in particular that I would love  to gloat over a bit....yep I'm petty like that.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Just Joe on April 01, 2019, 02:45:24 PM
THAT guy! Everyone needs to work with that guy at least once. I left my version behind a couple of jobs back.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on April 10, 2019, 12:09:57 PM
I don't want to wear shoes every day.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Nederstash on April 10, 2019, 12:34:36 PM
I used to have a coworker who would make the same joke every single morning (from a famous Dutch comedy series). I am so glad I don't work there anymore. He was a nice guy but man, I was instantly grumpy every time I heard that.

"Goeiesmorges!" or "Goeiemoggel!"? Both will have the same effect on my bowels as a strong cup of coffee.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Parizade on April 10, 2019, 03:50:07 PM

Reasons I haven't seen/didn't notice:
1. Never again having to estimate how long it will take to do something that's never been done before with an unknown scope, but let's make my random guess the official budget proposal anyway, even though I told you it was just a shot in the dark.
2. An end to "go ahead and work these 5 projects simultaneously, but this particular project is the most important one so focus on that..... until next week when I'll ask you why that other one isn't done yet and make it sound like you're incompetent for not realizing I wanted it done first actually... and now it's late and it's all your fault"
3. An end to choosing between being undercompensated because current employers don't increase your pay commensurate with your experience/market value or constantly changing employers (and probably locations) in order to be fairly compensated.
So accurate it made me feel a little sick reading it.

Well it's not really the reason I want to FIRE, but the petty part of me won't mind if my spendy ex finds out that I've retired a decade or two before he is able to. Ex and I had built a sizable nest egg (due to my frugal nature and against his will). We divorced 16 years ago and divided everything in half. While I'm getting ready to ride off into the sunset, he's probably back up to his eyeballs in debt and looking at several expensive years of educating the kids from his third marriage.
Good one! I too confess that I wouldn't mind if my spendy ex finds out I've retired a decade or two before he can.

I want to live in a more quiet world. I experience it today on my free Fridays. Quiet roads, quiet parking lots, quiet shops, readonably quiet ski tracks. So much nicer than the usual crowded world.
This doesn't sound petty, it sounds lovely.

Probably my most petty reason is so I am never again invited to a "party" by a coworker whose sole reason for having said party is to sell me something I don't need at a price that is way more than it's worth. Or, worse yet, have a coworker try to convince me to book my own party or become a "distributor" for said products. Trying to be polite while inside I am screaming at the stupidity of pyramid schemes is exhausting.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: lollylegs on April 10, 2019, 03:55:53 PM
  I don't want to smell the tuna that one of my colleagues brings everyday for lunch

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Buffalo Chip on April 10, 2019, 05:42:27 PM
My petty reasons: to get a dog. To never, ever have to dance around certain subjects because some thin-skinned twerp might get offended. So I can go to the store whenever I darn well please. So I never have to wear a collared shirt unless I want to.

All in all, none of my petty reasons are that huge of a deal to me. Well, maybe getting the dog is. 🤭
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: BookLoverL on April 11, 2019, 12:34:43 AM
Even though I've tried to incorporate more responsibility into my life recently, and am doing a good job of fulfilling those responsibilities, on some level there's a part of me that goes "WAAAAAAAHHHHH! I don't wanna!" when confronted with even a microgram of responsibility, especially if it's a responsibility I have to carry out at a specific time.

Also, it's a beautifully sunny morning today. Where am I going today? The office. Will I be able to take advantage of the weather to go on an epic walking adventure in my local area? No.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ApacheStache on April 11, 2019, 12:47:25 AM
I want to stop pretending like I'm excited by really stupid projects that will take a ridiculous number of hours of work and everyone knows will go nowhere.

Looking forward to this as well. My manager and senior co-workers (who are awesome) pull me aside privately and ask me in advance if I'm okay with working on a new product or initiative. It's nice of them to ask I guess, but it's difficult to pretend to be excited about these projects. Honestly, as long as I'm getting a paycheck and I'm not breaking the law, then I could care less what I'm working on. Not to mention, declining work because you don't feel like doing it sounds like a surefire way to miss out on a pay increase come review time.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: justchristine on April 11, 2019, 06:31:31 AM
After this week I have to add another reason: never have to sit in a 'pod' of desks.  Seriously what fucking moron thinks that's a good work space solution?!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: freya on April 11, 2019, 06:58:08 AM
What a great thread.  It should be required reading for anyone writing a news article on FIRE!

My petty reasons:

- Never having to see the word "mandatory" in an email again.

- Not having to fill out online forms or take online tests on an almost weekly basis.

- No more work-related travel to meetings that start at 7am and/or end at 10pm in another time zone.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on April 11, 2019, 08:18:49 AM
After this week I have to add another reason: never have to sit in a 'pod' of desks.  Seriously what fucking moron thinks that's a good work space solution?!
A status concious extrovert.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on April 11, 2019, 08:49:45 AM


Also, it's a beautifully sunny morning today. Where am I going today? The office. Will I be able to take advantage of the weather to go on an epic walking adventure in my local area? No.

I hate this! We have so little nice weather here, I hate having to blow a day of it sitting in a frigidly air conditioned sealed-up office.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on April 11, 2019, 09:23:48 AM
I used to have a coworker who would make the same joke every single morning (from a famous Dutch comedy series). I am so glad I don't work there anymore. He was a nice guy but man, I was instantly grumpy every time I heard that.

"Goeiesmorges!" or "Goeiemoggel!"? Both will have the same effect on my bowels as a strong cup of coffee.

Yup :(  They captured office life perfectly though, even 20 years later it's still so accurate.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on April 11, 2019, 09:34:23 AM
For me:
1) I like to fix things.  To build things.  To optimize things in my life.  To find "pain points" in my life and banish them.  To tackle projects just for fun.  Having a full-time job (even though I enjoy it!) gets in the way of fixing those things.
2) So I can occasionally stay up late playing video games without worrying about how it will affect me the next morning.
3) Waking up in the morning and staying in bed watching youtube or surfing until I'm hungry enough to go make breakfast.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: fattest_foot on April 11, 2019, 11:03:17 AM
I used to work in a modern glass/steel building in the middle of the city. We had great floor to ceiling windows all around the office building. However, when the sun came round in the afternoon, the automatic blinds would go all the way down (summer and winter). For every window. Even the ones that were in the shade. Every time, it felt like some prison door shutting down. Not only was I stuck in an office in beautiful weather, now I couldn't even SEE the beautiful weather.

I would usually go over to a panel beside the entry door and manually press the "up" button, raising the blinds to where the people working at the window could still work without the sun glaring in their screens. That lasted about an hour until the automatic mechanism would kick in again and fully lower the blinds.

Sometimes, I was stuck in awful, neverending conf calls and I couldn't do my blind-lifting trick. If I was lucky, a colleague would jump in and press the "up" button.

Now that I am FIREd I really enjoy being outdoors on sunny days and definitely do not miss being stuck in semi-darkness with artificial light.

Ugh, due to the type of work we do here, I work in a building with zero windows. ZERO! In fact, I haven't worked in a building with a window in almost 7 years. You know how depressing that is?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: By the River on April 11, 2019, 01:03:51 PM
Its great weather here today and there is a free music festival today through Sunday about a mile from me.  I went at lunch and listened to a few songs and will be going tomorrow and Sunday, so not all bad. 

However, a co-worker retired last year just texted.  He has seen 3 bands so far, found some shade and is listening to another, then will walk down to another stage to hear more.   I don't want to be looking at a spreadsheet anymore. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Odiedog859 on April 11, 2019, 02:42:59 PM
So I don't have to change 6 passwords every month to different systems,  that all have a different format requirement......

(having just been prompted to change another one......)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: seattleite on April 11, 2019, 03:16:35 PM
High school classmates — Yeah, so maybe it's been 25 years and they don't know or even care, but I get satisfaction thinking about being retired early while those assholes (some of them) are still working. You said petty, right? Oh yeah, though it turns out that a lot of the people that I thought were assholes because I didn't fit in and wasn't popular are actually really nice people... sooooo.... maybe I'm the asshole?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Playing with Fire UK on April 12, 2019, 12:42:45 AM
So I don't have to change 6 passwords every month to different systems,  that all have a different format requirement......

(having just been prompted to change another one......)

So much this. Especially when they limit the length and prevent special characters then wonder why people give up on secure passwords or use a post-it note.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Freedomin5 on April 12, 2019, 02:10:26 AM
One of my coworkers is standing in the hallway shouting and arguing with his manager. He has his own office! As does the manager! Why can't they go yell and scream in one of their offices! Ugh! This is not the first time. I'm only in the office once per week, and I hear it at least a couple times a month. (Luckily, I also have my own office with a door and a noise cancellation machine.) I pity the coworkers who are in the open pod.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on April 12, 2019, 08:52:34 AM
High school classmates — Yeah, so maybe it's been 25 years and they don't know or even care, but I get satisfaction thinking about being retired early while those assholes (some of them) are still working. You said petty, right? Oh yeah, though it turns out that a lot of the people that I thought were assholes because I didn't fit in and wasn't popular are actually really nice people... sooooo.... maybe I'm the asshole?
People change with time :)  I like to think I was a pretty good kid, but I like to think I'm a lot nicer and more mature now.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: fattest_foot on April 12, 2019, 10:46:11 AM
So I don't have to change 6 passwords every month to different systems,  that all have a different format requirement......

(having just been prompted to change another one......)

So much this. Especially when they limit the length and prevent special characters then wonder why people give up on secure passwords or use a post-it note.

Don't forget it can't be similar to any of your last 100 passwords!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on April 12, 2019, 11:17:39 AM
So I don't have to change 6 passwords every month to different systems,  that all have a different format requirement......

(having just been prompted to change another one......)

So much this. Especially when they limit the length and prevent special characters then wonder why people give up on secure passwords or use a post-it note.

Don't forget it can't be similar to any of your last 100 passwords!

This morning at work, I changed my password because they forced me to.
My old pattern was: Someword345!. On my windows machine, I changed it to: Someword678! That went fine. After I did that, I couldn't log in to a program that I use every day. Turns out that the IT in my company stores passwords in some strange way that causes an hour delay to spread to other systems that use the same AD users. Luckily we also have a separate administrator user that I could access for a while to do some work.

But we also have a virtual machine with a separate password, which I always change to the same as my windows password. But when I entered my pwd change there, the virtual desktop interpreted it as a similar word. I tried like 8 times, sometimes not typing the 2 new passwords exactly the same way. And when I did type it correctly, it complaned about the password being similar to the old one. Obviously it only compared the word, not the other characters. So I ended up having to change my windows password once again, to be able to make the same passwords in the two desktops.

Now I have started my easter holiday, 10 days away from work. Jay! But when I come back on day 11, I will probably have forgotten when the new password is. I have forgotten it now already...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: BuildingFrugalHabits on April 13, 2019, 08:38:07 AM
Now I have started my easter holiday, 10 days away from work. Jay! But when I come back on day 11, I will probably have forgotten when the new password is. I have forgotten it now already...

That's the sign of a good vacation!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Freedomin5 on April 13, 2019, 05:58:15 PM
I was reminded of this petty reason on Friday after parking my butt in my office chair for the entire day....My chair is uncomfortable. The last time I asked for a new chair, it took three years before it was approved and purchased....and that was only because one of the chair legs broke.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on April 15, 2019, 09:17:41 AM
So I don't have to change 6 passwords every month to different systems,  that all have a different format requirement......

(having just been prompted to change another one......)

So much this. Especially when they limit the length and prevent special characters then wonder why people give up on secure passwords or use a post-it note.

Ugh, yes.  I had a system that required exactly 8 characters, no specials, no double letters, no dictionary words, must be changed every 90 days, and not similar to 10 past passwords.  I had to develop a little algorithm for making new passwords. At least I can still use it... but I STILL have to write down a reminder clue for all the accounts.  I've got a post-it note with 14 accounts hidden right now.

....My chair is uncomfortable. The last time I asked for a new chair, it took three years before it was approved and purchased....and that was only because one of the chair legs broke.

So much, this. 
I've started taking over a counter in our kitchenette a few hours a day so I can get out of my chair.  I'm really close to bringing in a small bolster to sit on and working on the floor for part of the day, too.  Most of my coworkers have private offices, but I'm in the open cube farm at the main entrance with 3 others and am not quite at the IDGAF level necessary to work on the floor in front of the door, but I am damn close.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on April 16, 2019, 11:14:45 PM
I found a new petty reason today for being FIREd.

My sister is staying with me and working remotely. I went to sleep late yesterday catching up on some recorded shows I missed while out of town...so I woke up around 11am. I am FIREd already.

She made a snarky comment along the lines of "if I got up that late I would feel like I wasted the day".

I replied "I don't care, I don't have anyone to report to."

She said she would keep her words to herself in the future.

Priceless...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AllOfTheDogs on April 17, 2019, 10:53:56 AM
So I don't have to change 6 passwords every month to different systems,  that all have a different format requirement......

(having just been prompted to change another one......)

This. So much this. I worked from home the other day and spent five minutes just guessing at passwords until I got the correct one.

But I am especially excited to be free from tracking and billing my time in six minute increments.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on April 17, 2019, 11:19:51 AM
I found a new petty reason today for being FIREd.

My sister is staying with me and working remotely. I went to sleep late yesterday catching up on some recorded shows I missed while out of town...so I woke up around 11am. I am FIREd already.

She made a snarky comment along the lines of "if I got up that late I would feel like I wasted the day".

I replied "I don't care, I don't have anyone to report to."

She said she would keep her words to herself in the future.

Priceless...

I've never understood that mentality anyway.  Why does nobody ever say "if I went to bed that early I would feel like I wasted the night"?  Nighttime hours are worth just as much as early morning ones, despite what people may think. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on April 17, 2019, 12:55:30 PM
I found a new petty reason today for being FIREd.

My sister is staying with me and working remotely. I went to sleep late yesterday catching up on some recorded shows I missed while out of town...so I woke up around 11am. I am FIREd already.

She made a snarky comment along the lines of "if I got up that late I would feel like I wasted the day".

I replied "I don't care, I don't have anyone to report to."

She said she would keep her words to herself in the future.

Priceless...

I've never understood that mentality anyway.  Why does nobody ever say "if I went to bed that early I would feel like I wasted the night"?  Nighttime hours are worth just as much as early morning ones, despite what people may think.

Ha ha... that was one of my responses to her as well.

I am on the east coast and recovering from being on west coast time but I have never been a morning person.

I woke up late again today and she made no comments. #winning
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zoot on April 18, 2019, 12:58:59 PM
My petty reasons: to get a dog.

OMG yes, this, times about a billion.  That, and making cookies, are the two most salient inner symbols I have for What I Want in my post-retirement life.

I absolutely cannot WAIT for the day when I will sit on my sofa cuddling my dog, while a batch of cookies bakes in the oven. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Psychstache on April 18, 2019, 01:56:46 PM
I hate dress shirts.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on April 18, 2019, 03:34:56 PM
I hate dress shirts.

+1.  I hate any shirt with a collar. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DeniseNJ on April 19, 2019, 07:15:18 AM
I miss my dog.  She's so snuggly in the morning and I hate having to cut our snuggle time short to get out of bed to get ready for work.
Boss:  You're late!
Me:  I was petting the dog!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tyson on April 19, 2019, 09:33:37 AM
Petty reason #2 for me.   The idea of a "week-end". 

(https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod.s3.amazonaws.com/images/weekend-1531488294.gif)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AlanStache on April 19, 2019, 02:21:11 PM
I dont want deal with the politics and pro/con of rewriting someone else's code. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: slipslop on April 19, 2019, 02:32:29 PM
I miss my dog.  She's so snuggly in the morning and I hate having to cut our snuggle time short to get out of bed to get ready for work.
Boss:  You're late!
Me:  I was petting the dog!

Reminded me of this Lunar Baboon comic: http://www.lunarbaboon.com/comics/soft.html (http://www.lunarbaboon.com/comics/soft.html)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bloop Bloop on April 19, 2019, 03:27:15 PM
I would like to be able to use my spare time productively like by buying a swimming pool, filling it with gold coins and swimming in it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ApacheStache on April 19, 2019, 07:41:50 PM
I wish to never hear one of my coworkers clipping his nails at his desk a few cubicles over.

Along those same lines, I look forward to not subjecting myself to sitting in an office with coworkers who refuse to stay home from work when they're clearly sick and contagious with some exotic strain of the flu bug.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: effigy98 on April 19, 2019, 07:56:31 PM
Annoying laugh one girl makes. She does it all day long. Its like a partial laugh, almost an acknowledgment someone is talking to her, its not a real laugh. It is super fake and annoying to hear all day. If I say something I will probably be escorted out for harassing her so my best friend Bose takes care of it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: markbike528CBX on April 20, 2019, 12:29:57 AM
I wish to never hear one of my coworkers clipping his nails at his desk a few cubicles over.

You work with Wally? https://dilbert.com/strip/2019-04-19
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on April 20, 2019, 07:54:09 AM
I wish to never hear one of my coworkers clipping his nails at his desk a few cubicles over.

You work with Wally? https://dilbert.com/strip/2019-04-19
Ha! I had the exact same reaction. Dilbert was rather timely yesterday.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Korrywow on April 22, 2019, 07:59:36 AM
I couldn't stand working with greedy, dishonest empty suits and/ or other morons...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: bluebelle on April 22, 2019, 10:31:31 AM
screw the government by paying A LOT less income tax.  I can live on less than what I currently pay in income tax currently.  Which means my income tax will drop to approximately 15% of what I'm currently paying.  And that number will drop even further, once I get to 65, as there are more tax credits available to those 65 and older (at least for now).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rachellynn99 on April 22, 2019, 01:03:17 PM
I'm looking forward to showering less frequently. Honestly I really don't love showering, drying hair, being wet with wet towels etc. I do so now bc work and all and social hygiene acceptability and my hair looks horrendous without a shower. But....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: auntie_betty on April 22, 2019, 01:44:36 PM
I got fed up of hiding the fact that I'm basically bone-idle.









Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on April 22, 2019, 06:48:44 PM
Quote
But I am especially excited to be free from tracking and billing my time in six minute increments.

This!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: better late on April 22, 2019, 07:38:49 PM
Annoying laugh one girl makes. She does it all day long. Its like a partial laugh, almost an acknowledgment someone is talking to her, its not a real laugh. It is super fake and annoying to hear all day. If I say something I will probably be escorted out for harassing her so my best friend Bose takes care of it.

Whoa do we work in the same office? The woman who sits across from my cubical adds a huh huh huh after practically every sentence she says. I think she thinks she’s clever/funny.  And she talks - a lot! Incredibly annoying.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on April 22, 2019, 10:06:35 PM
Annoying laugh one girl makes. She does it all day long. Its like a partial laugh, almost an acknowledgment someone is talking to her, its not a real laugh. It is super fake and annoying to hear all day. If I say something I will probably be escorted out for harassing her so my best friend Bose takes care of it.

Whoa do we work in the same office? The woman who sits across from my cubical adds a huh huh huh after practically every sentence she says. I think she thinks she’s clever/funny.  And she talks - a lot! Incredibly annoying.

I have one who laughs like a hyena.  At everything.  We have an open plan, hotdesk situation, which means you can hear her from everywhere.

I just got back from 2 weeks of school holidays.  I had forgotten about the laugh.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on April 23, 2019, 01:50:30 AM
To be able to not spend my days off thinking about how much there is to be done at work and how inconvenient it is to have a day (or several days) off.

And to be able to sleep without thinking of work issues.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on April 23, 2019, 08:39:33 AM


I have one who laughs like a hyena.  At everything.  We have an open plan, hotdesk situation, which means you can hear her from everywhere.

I just got back from 2 weeks of school holidays.  I had forgotten about the laugh.

We have one of these. It is piercing and feels like it's stabbing me in the brain. They keep moving her to different cubicles. Now she is near-ish me. GREAT.
(The worst part is when she is in the lunchroom early in the morning cackling when OMG I just want to get my damn coffee!)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: HumanAfterAll on April 24, 2019, 09:36:56 PM
I need to make up for lost time dedicating 80% of my energy to my career so far. My job is great, though it suffers from many of the annoyances described in this thread. The mission is inspiring, but the organization is like a wounded beast. After a decade plus and several attempts to fix it from the inside, I’ve stopped believing it can be fixed.

I want to do less, and do it well. Pursuit of a state of grace, rather than a rolling catastrophe. I want to stop being the funnel of conflict just to get my job done because everyone is double-booked.

I want to have time for myself on weekdays, so weekends and evenings can be for my family with my full attention.

Some of these feel petty because I may be giving up great achievements for them. It would be nice to look up at the moon and say “my hardware landed there”. But I’m not sure it’s worth the personal cost.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on April 24, 2019, 11:26:25 PM
Too many petty reasons here are not petty at all.
Or maybe I am lost in translation...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on April 25, 2019, 04:46:17 AM
Too many petty reasons here are not petty at all.
Or maybe I am lost in translation...

So I can do my number two whenever my body signals it, without having to plan it around work meetings.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on April 25, 2019, 06:31:06 AM
Too many petty reasons here are not petty at all.
Or maybe I am lost in translation...

So I can do my number two whenever my body signals it, without having to plan it around work meetings.

Or being embarrassed at stinking up the office.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FiveSigmas on April 25, 2019, 11:17:52 AM
Too many petty reasons here are not petty at all.
Or maybe I am lost in translation...

So I can do my number two whenever my body signals it, without having to plan it around work meetings.

Hey, this thread is for petty reasons, not potty reasons! (That said, I totally empathize!)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: PinsAndArrows on April 25, 2019, 11:39:04 AM
Echoing a lot of what has been said.  I look forward to

* Not having to wake up at unnatural hours to beat traffic to get to work.
* Not feeling watched by coworkers if I dare to have Youtube playing music in the background.
* Not staring out the window at the sunny day I am missing thanks to working hours.
* Not scanning Reddit because I am required to be in that seat, even if I don't have work to do.
* Not considering "does this make me look more employable" in every interaction with my boss.
* Not having "Inspirational" money giving programs that limit how much you can recognize hard work.
* Not being tired all the time.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Pigeon on April 25, 2019, 02:05:50 PM
I have a direct report who is indescribably annoying, incompetent and just plain weird.  She thinks she is excellent.  She desperately wants to engage people in dialogue about grand social issues at all times.  Her behavior is horrible in meetings.  She has tenure and I cannot get rid of her.  Every email she sents is pages long, incoherent and chock full of academic jargon.  She must have some kind of untreated mental health issue or personality disorder, but no matter how much I read, I can't put my finger on what it is.

I want to never hear her ask another pointless question.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on April 25, 2019, 02:24:59 PM
Echoing a lot of what has been said.  I look forward to

* Not having to wake up at unnatural hours to beat traffic to get to work.
* Not feeling watched by coworkers if I dare to have Youtube playing music in the background.
* Not staring out the window at the sunny day I am missing thanks to working hours.
* Not scanning Reddit because I am required to be in that seat, even if I don't have work to do.
* Not considering "does this make me look more employable" in every interaction with my boss.
* Not having "Inspirational" money giving programs that limit how much you can recognize hard work.
* Not being tired all the time.

I think my Waze app thinks I am still mega-commuting as I occasionally receive alerts of traffic jams that were on my regular route to work.

One of my petty FIRE pleasures is smiling and deleting those alerts. NO MORE TRAFFIC JAMS is one of the pleasures of FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisy on April 25, 2019, 02:27:13 PM
Annoying laugh one girl makes. She does it all day long. Its like a partial laugh, almost an acknowledgment someone is talking to her, its not a real laugh. It is super fake and annoying to hear all day. If I say something I will probably be escorted out for harassing her so my best friend Bose takes care of it.

Whoa do we work in the same office? The woman who sits across from my cubical adds a huh huh huh after practically every sentence she says. I think she thinks she’s clever/funny.  And she talks - a lot! Incredibly annoying.

I have one who laughs like a hyena.  At everything.  We have an open plan, hotdesk situation, which means you can hear her from everywhere.

I just got back from 2 weeks of school holidays.  I had forgotten about the laugh.

I used to work with THAT LOUD GUY...you know, the one you can hear his conversations even though he sits 3 aisles away.

Even his sneeze was loud. We had hurricane impact proof windows in the office, and every time he would sneeze the whole floor and windows would shake in their reverberations. I'm not exaggerating.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on April 25, 2019, 02:30:43 PM
I used to work with THAT LOUD GUY...you know, the one you can hear his conversations even though he sits 3 aisles away.

Even his sneeze was loud. We had hurricane impact proof windows in the office, and every time he would sneeze the whole floor and windows would shake in their reverberations. I'm not exaggerating.

Yeah, you ordered hurrican-proof, but not sneeze proof! Different wave profile. Needs the sneeze safe(tm) upgrade!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: BookLoverL on April 26, 2019, 12:42:28 AM
I used to work with THAT LOUD GUY...you know, the one you can hear his conversations even though he sits 3 aisles away.

Even his sneeze was loud. We had hurricane impact proof windows in the office, and every time he would sneeze the whole floor and windows would shake in their reverberations. I'm not exaggerating.

Yeah, you ordered hurrican-proof, but not sneeze proof! Different wave profile. Needs the sneeze safe(tm) upgrade!

Maybe he's actually secretly related to Superman. There was this one episode of Smallville where Clark got a cold and one of his sneezes blew all of the papers off the desk at the Daily Planet...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FreeBear on April 29, 2019, 07:24:09 AM
I need to make up for lost time dedicating 80% of my energy to my career so far. My job is great, though it suffers from many of the annoyances described in this thread. The mission is inspiring, but the organization is like a wounded beast. After a decade plus and several attempts to fix it from the inside, I’ve stopped believing it can be fixed.

I want to do less, and do it well. Pursuit of a state of grace, rather than a rolling catastrophe. I want to stop being the funnel of conflict just to get my job done because everyone is double-booked.

I want to have time for myself on weekdays, so weekends and evenings can be for my family with my full attention.

Some of these feel petty because I may be giving up great achievements for them. It would be nice to look up at the moon and say “my hardware landed there”. But I’m not sure it’s worth the personal cost.

Yep, I too wanted my life back. Some aspects of my job should have been meaningful, at least on paper, but the personal cost was indeed too high for too many years.  I'm glad that over and I'm moving on to other things I need to do in life that were nearly ignored for decades.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Just Joe on April 29, 2019, 10:40:45 AM
Is there a thread for the reasons that we want our coworkers to retire???

I know a nice fellow who tells some amazing insider stories about our workplace. Eye popping stuff.

For a while I bought it all, then after spending even more time with him, he also started telling me about his gov't conspiracy theories which put all his workplace stries in question for me.

His stories are the kind that Steve Bannon might publish. He believes this all this stuff. I look forward to his happy retirement. I can't speed up my own retirement too much so his retirement is almost as good.

I really like my job and my workplace but when I am able, I'll happily stay home.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bloop Bloop on April 29, 2019, 11:12:34 AM
screw the government by paying A LOT less income tax.  I can live on less than what I currently pay in income tax currently.  Which means my income tax will drop to approximately 15% of what I'm currently paying.  And that number will drop even further, once I get to 65, as there are more tax credits available to those 65 and older (at least for now).

+1

Made me laugh, made me cry in recognition.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: bluebelle on April 29, 2019, 12:26:24 PM
screw the government by paying A LOT less income tax.  I can live on less than what I currently pay in income tax currently.  Which means my income tax will drop to approximately 15% of what I'm currently paying.  And that number will drop even further, once I get to 65, as there are more tax credits available to those 65 and older (at least for now).

+1

Made me laugh, made me cry in recognition.
it's depressing really, I got a nice pay bump earlier this year, and have some long term incentives maturing this year, it will bump me into the highest tax bracket.  The government will get 53.53% of the last dollar I earn.  It just pisses me off....If I wasn't already motivated to retire early and live on less, that really does it for me.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireHiker on April 29, 2019, 06:19:00 PM
I share several of the same reasons already mentioned, but today I'm adding people in meetings with damned clicky pens to the list.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FIREstache on April 29, 2019, 07:21:43 PM
Attending meetings, answering the phone, the long walk through the parking lot on cold winter days.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on April 30, 2019, 02:01:02 PM
The password thing.  I have at least 50, many different user names too.  Some passwords have 2 damned user names.  I have a spreadsheet, there's literally no other way to keep track of them all.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: RyanAtTanagra on April 30, 2019, 02:16:26 PM
The password thing.  I have at least 50, many different user names too.  Some passwords have 2 damned user names.  I have a spreadsheet, there's literally no other way to keep track of them all.

1Password or LastPass.  I never type 99% of my passwords anymore.  There are few things in security that both increase usability AND security, but password managers are one of them.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DeepEllumStache on April 30, 2019, 03:13:00 PM
The password thing.  I have at least 50, many different user names too.  Some passwords have 2 damned user names.  I have a spreadsheet, there's literally no other way to keep track of them all.

1Password or LastPass.  I never type 99% of my passwords anymore.  There are few things in security that both increase usability AND security, but password managers are one of them.

Unless you are an idiot who forgets the password to your stupid password manager. Grump grump.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on April 30, 2019, 03:48:30 PM
The password thing.  I have at least 50, many different user names too.  Some passwords have 2 damned user names.  I have a spreadsheet, there's literally no other way to keep track of them all.

1Password or LastPass.  I never type 99% of my passwords anymore.  There are few things in security that both increase usability AND security, but password managers are one of them.
I have that at home, I'm talking about work though.  Yeah, not happening.  The spreadsheet is in a fairly secure location, it's what everyone does there.  Not the best thing, but I really don't have enough fucks to give to suggest they change policies.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on April 30, 2019, 10:08:14 PM
A petty reason?  I hate getting black hands from whiteboard markers.  I'm a teacher and this drives me nuts.  It washes off easily, but retirement will mean no more whiteboards.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Rhoon on May 01, 2019, 04:32:47 PM
But I know I'm deleting hundreds of people that first day.

I'm definitely going the other way -- I'm going to add all my coworkers to my accounts so they can watch me being retired while they're all at work. Think I'll tag them in lots of office space and "the office" quotes, memes, etc..
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: tipster350 on May 01, 2019, 04:48:42 PM
I don't want to hear "Person X (underling), keep me honest here" followed by a confidently stated declaration, when they don't know what they're talking about. They want the underling to save them from humiliation by either confirming the veracity of the statement, thus bolstering their position Or, if statement is inaccurate, dancing around awkwardly in an attempt to correct the information in a way that flatters the boss and doesn't read as a correction.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: tipster350 on May 02, 2019, 07:28:56 AM
I never want to hear "very aggressive timeline" again
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on May 02, 2019, 08:46:13 AM
When I came back to my job after a leave of absence, my windows password was reset to "SomeWord1".  Per IT policy, I am forced to change that password every 90 days.  Each time I change that password, I just add one more to the number at the end of the password.  I'm currently at "SomeWord49".  I don't know if I should laugh or cry....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AlanStache on May 02, 2019, 10:38:23 AM
I think this is me being petty but whatever...

Internal communication where I work is VERY bad.  It would be fun to give my letter of resignation directly to the janitor who would dispose of it rather than turning it into my boss.  Then two weeks latter start saying my goodbyes and when my boss asks WTF?  Reply with "I gave my notice to the janitor - did you not ask them for it?  I am sure they would have passed it along had you asked." 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on May 02, 2019, 11:26:18 AM
I never want to hear "very aggressive timeline" again

I would like to FIRE on a very aggressive timeline. 

There are so many buzzwords and phrases I could live without. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MoMan on May 02, 2019, 02:38:01 PM
I want to go hiking on a Wednesday because the weather is gorgeous. I want to take a month-long road trip out West and not be made to feel guilty. I want to work in my woodshop during the daylight hours. Are those reasons petty? I really don't think so. Honestly, I don't think I have any petty reasons for wanting to FIRE. I just want to reclaim my humanity.

Oh shit, I think someone stole my identity! I will add that I never want to watch another fucking gorgeous spring/fall day slip through my fingers while I watch helplessly from a beige, corporate cubicle under fluorescent lighting behind a plate glass window.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on May 02, 2019, 05:23:21 PM
When I came back to my job after a leave of absence, my windows password was reset to "SomeWord1".  Per IT policy, I am forced to change that password every 90 days.  Each time I change that password, I just add one more to the number at the end of the password.  I'm currently at "SomeWord49".  I don't know if I should laugh or cry....

I love this.  A job I left 2 years ago, I was up to "Mypassword31".  I thought it was hilarious that the IT system made us change, but allowed such petty changes.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: couponvan on May 02, 2019, 06:39:26 PM
When I came back to my job after a leave of absence, my windows password was reset to "SomeWord1".  Per IT policy, I am forced to change that password every 90 days.  Each time I change that password, I just add one more to the number at the end of the password.  I'm currently at "SomeWord49".  I don't know if I should laugh or cry....

I love this.  A job I left 2 years ago, I was up to "Mypassword31".  I thought it was hilarious that the IT system made us change, but allowed such petty changes.

I got out at 31....I wonder just how many people use the countdown/countup method.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on May 02, 2019, 09:56:31 PM
When I came back to my job after a leave of absence, my windows password was reset to "SomeWord1".  Per IT policy, I am forced to change that password every 90 days.  Each time I change that password, I just add one more to the number at the end of the password.  I'm currently at "SomeWord49".  I don't know if I should laugh or cry....

I love this.  A job I left 2 years ago, I was up to "Mypassword31".  I thought it was hilarious that the IT system made us change, but allowed such petty changes.

I got out at 31....I wonder just how many people use the countdown/countup method.
yup, I'm in that crowd!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Raenia on May 03, 2019, 06:19:33 AM
When I came back to my job after a leave of absence, my windows password was reset to "SomeWord1".  Per IT policy, I am forced to change that password every 90 days.  Each time I change that password, I just add one more to the number at the end of the password.  I'm currently at "SomeWord49".  I don't know if I should laugh or cry....

I love this.  A job I left 2 years ago, I was up to "Mypassword31".  I thought it was hilarious that the IT system made us change, but allowed such petty changes.

I got out at 31....I wonder just how many people use the countdown/countup method.
yup, I'm in that crowd!

Our IT is wise to this - new password is not allowed to be too similar to the last several old passwords.  I don't know how they judge that, maybe no more than 5 characters in a row match or something like that?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Slow&Steady on May 03, 2019, 07:12:45 AM
When I came back to my job after a leave of absence, my windows password was reset to "SomeWord1".  Per IT policy, I am forced to change that password every 90 days.  Each time I change that password, I just add one more to the number at the end of the password.  I'm currently at "SomeWord49".  I don't know if I should laugh or cry....

I love this.  A job I left 2 years ago, I was up to "Mypassword31".  I thought it was hilarious that the IT system made us change, but allowed such petty changes.

I got out at 31....I wonder just how many people use the countdown/countup method.
yup, I'm in that crowd!

Our IT is wise to this - new password is not allowed to be too similar to the last several old passwords.  I don't know how they judge that, maybe no more than 5 characters in a row match or something like that?
One of my previous jobs stopped this by not letting 2 numbers be next to each other, you could only go up to 9 and then had to change something else about the password.  There were a bunch of other rules too, the letters couldn't match your first or last name, I don't think it could start with a number, it couldn't match any of your previous like 25 passwords.

I hate passwords!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Sailor Sam on May 03, 2019, 07:35:13 AM
I'd like to gather all my uniforms up, and then gather all the uniform appurtenances up, and burn them in a gigantic bonfire of rage and destiny fulfilled.

I look forward to the moment with the rapine of Smaug on his loot pile.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on May 03, 2019, 11:34:14 AM
Yes, I do same password + number, counting up.

Boyfriend once had to change his password at work and included the f-bomb in the new password. That's how he learned that his workplace monitors his keystrokes. Oops. That was an embarrassing conversation with HR.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on May 03, 2019, 11:43:40 AM
I want to go hiking on a Wednesday because the weather is gorgeous. I want to take a month-long road trip out West and not be made to feel guilty. I want to work in my woodshop during the daylight hours. Are those reasons petty? I really don't think so. Honestly, I don't think I have any petty reasons for wanting to FIRE. I just want to reclaim my humanity.

Oh shit, I think someone stole my identity! I will add that I never want to watch another fucking gorgeous spring/fall day slip through my fingers while I watch helplessly from a beige, corporate cubicle under fluorescent lighting behind a plate glass window.

I don't think I would classify that as petty, though. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: markbike528CBX on May 03, 2019, 01:02:48 PM
Yes, I do same password + number, counting up.

Boyfriend once had to change his password at work and included the f-bomb in the new password. That's how he learned that his workplace monitors his keystrokes. Oops. That was an embarrassing conversation with HR.

Not a very secure password then is it?  I think IT should win this one (Jesus, did I just say that?). 
My work password root was bad language and I updated it with 3 numbers (ie 111, 222, 333, 444 etc) every 90 days and had a sticky with the current 3 numbers on the monitor (40", owned by me, just because, and it did a good job on synthesizing 4K from 1080p). 
They required that the password did not match the last 13, so sometimes I dropped it back to the 2 number variations.   WTF, if your system remembers 13 old passwords, that has gotta be hackable.

ON topic- I had a close colleague who was fired for searching a word in German (not a language he knows, trust me ) that was apparently a bad word in German.  So uncool. 
His  boss, bosses-boss, bosses-bosses boss, put in an effort not to loose him, but HR had a bug up their ass, and he was canned.  Now  happier at another place. 
Not a place I want to work again (good reminder, now that I'm FIRED from that place).

ON topic- the old workplace has instituted ID badges (20 people max) because the SemiBigCorp policy.  If I had been there as the policy was instituted, it would be really petty, but a clear reason to FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: RyanAtTanagra on May 03, 2019, 01:35:31 PM
WTF, if your system remembers 13 old passwords, that has gotta be hackable.

If they're hashed properly it's not insecure to store X number of previous passwords, although 13 is excessive.  However, checking to see if a password is SIMILAR to a previous one means that the passwords are not hashed, and are retrievable by the system/a user, which is a BIG no-no in password security (password hashing is one way, even the system itself can't get a password back from it's hash).  That's a way worse security violation than reusing a password, or using a similar password.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AlanStache on May 03, 2019, 02:50:51 PM
WTF, if your system remembers 13 old passwords, that has gotta be hackable.

If they're hashed properly it's not insecure to store X number of previous passwords, although 13 is excessive.  However, checking to see if a password is SIMILAR to a previous one means that the passwords are not hashed, and are retrievable by the system/a user, which is a BIG no-no in password security (password hashing is one way, even the system itself can't get a password back from it's hash).  That's a way worse security violation than reusing a password, or using a similar password.

Could the system store hashes of consecutive subsets of the passwords charters?
ie: "mypass12" would be hashed in full for login validation but hashes of "mypass1<null>", "mypass<null><null>", "<null>ypass12", etc, would be stored for checking new password uniqueness. 




Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: RyanAtTanagra on May 03, 2019, 03:06:08 PM
WTF, if your system remembers 13 old passwords, that has gotta be hackable.

If they're hashed properly it's not insecure to store X number of previous passwords, although 13 is excessive.  However, checking to see if a password is SIMILAR to a previous one means that the passwords are not hashed, and are retrievable by the system/a user, which is a BIG no-no in password security (password hashing is one way, even the system itself can't get a password back from it's hash).  That's a way worse security violation than reusing a password, or using a similar password.

Could the system store hashes of consecutive subsets of the passwords charters?
ie: "mypass12" would be hashed in full for login validation but hashes of "mypass1<null>", "mypass<null><null>", "<null>ypass12", etc, would be stored for checking new password uniqueness.

Yea you could store a hash for every substring in the password, then for the new password hash every substring to see if any of them match up, but man that'd be super convoluted, and in my experience anyone with super strict and annoying password policies don't actually know how to do password security properly (hence the overcompensation), so most likely they're just storing the password in a retrievable way, or just plain text, which still happens a scary amount, especially for internal systems.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ApacheStache on May 13, 2019, 06:50:46 PM
Looking forward to FIRE so I no longer need to hear the new guy sitting next to me aggressively clear his throat every 5 minutes. FFS man, get a lozenge, tea, water or something. Hearing him chew his food with his mouth open and scarf down his lunch like a ravenous food-deprived lion is also a big motivating factor.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on May 14, 2019, 12:18:56 AM
Looking forward to FIRE so I no longer need to hear the new guy sitting next to me aggressively clear his throat every 5 minutes. FFS man, get a lozenge, tea, water or something. Hearing him chew his food with his mouth open and scarf down his lunch like a ravenous food-deprived lion is also a big motivating factor.
I call bullshit, ApacheStache. Those reasons aren't petty at all. Justifiable homicide, IMO.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: By the River on May 14, 2019, 07:52:40 AM
When I came back to my job after a leave of absence, my windows password was reset to "SomeWord1".  Per IT policy, I am forced to change that password every 90 days.  Each time I change that password, I just add one more to the number at the end of the password.  I'm currently at "SomeWord49".  I don't know if I should laugh or cry....

I love this.  A job I left 2 years ago, I was up to "Mypassword31".  I thought it was hilarious that the IT system made us change, but allowed such petty changes.

I got out at 31....I wonder just how many people use the countdown/countup method.
yup, I'm in that crowd!

Our passwords expire every 60 days.  I'm up to mypassword57 and planning to leave before it hits three digits. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on May 14, 2019, 10:57:00 AM
Looking forward to FIRE so I no longer need to hear the new guy sitting next to me aggressively clear his throat every 5 minutes. FFS man, get a lozenge, tea, water or something. Hearing him chew his food with his mouth open and scarf down his lunch like a ravenous food-deprived lion is also a big motivating factor.
I call bullshit, ApacheStache. Those reasons aren't petty at all. Justifiable homicide, IMO.

My nightmare!  Throat clearing and *sniff*.... *sniff*.... when there are tissues IN THE KITCHEN DAMNIT you don't even need to excuse yourself JUST GO!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Freedomin5 on May 14, 2019, 04:33:05 PM
Looking forward to FIRE so I no longer need to hear the new guy sitting next to me aggressively clear his throat every 5 minutes. FFS man, get a lozenge, tea, water or something. Hearing him chew his food with his mouth open and scarf down his lunch like a ravenous food-deprived lion is also a big motivating factor.

My first question was going to be if you live in China, and then I realized you live in a Denver. What you describe is so common here I’ve become desensitized to it. Only the really really loud chewers and slurpers bother me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: EricL on May 14, 2019, 05:11:17 PM
I guess if I were to point out one thing, it's meetings.  We had so many that essentially amounted to so little and took up valuable work time just to stoke some ego or fit in some weird idea of an operational schedule. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Korrywow on May 25, 2019, 07:49:09 AM
Re. meetings. So true.
I always needed a pint or 2 of a good crafty after Board meetings, especially if there were lawyers or megalomaniacs in expensive suits involved.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FLOW on May 25, 2019, 08:05:10 AM
I hate small talk. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zikoris on May 25, 2019, 11:20:23 AM
Never having to train computer-illiterate new hires how to send couriers again. My god.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on May 25, 2019, 11:30:02 AM
I am SO FUCKING TIRED of the phrase "sync up"

Jeez, you would think we were all iPhones connecting to iTunes or some shit like that....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GermanStache on May 25, 2019, 11:32:44 AM
I want to FIRE so I can knit the entire day every day. And so I can make ALL my food from scratch and spend the days cooking and baking .
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: kanga1622 on May 25, 2019, 02:20:03 PM
When I came back to my job after a leave of absence, my windows password was reset to "SomeWord1".  Per IT policy, I am forced to change that password every 90 days.  Each time I change that password, I just add one more to the number at the end of the password.  I'm currently at "SomeWord49".  I don't know if I should laugh or cry....

I love this.  A job I left 2 years ago, I was up to "Mypassword31".  I thought it was hilarious that the IT system made us change, but allowed such petty changes.

I got out at 31....I wonder just how many people use the countdown/countup method.
yup, I'm in that crowd!

Our IT is wise to this - new password is not allowed to be too similar to the last several old passwords.  I don't know how they judge that, maybe no more than 5 characters in a row match or something like that?

One of our systems make you change the password every 90 days and the new password cannot have more than 2 characters in common with the previous 5. It is a ridiculous time trying to come up with a new password. I started using zoo animals followed by a different sequence of numbers.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on May 25, 2019, 02:29:43 PM
I want to FIRE so I can knit the entire day every day. And so I can make ALL my food from scratch and spend the days cooking and baking .

What do you do now?

I find it almost comical how enthusiastic many of us are for adopting the drudgery of our grandparents.  I'm a PhD scientist who spent his career in federal service, sitting behind computer screens and presenting to academic audiences, and now that I'm retired I swing a hammer.  Suddenly I have calluses on my hands, and tendonitis in my elbows, and dirt under my fingernails.  I gave up a decidedly white collar life to pursue decidedly blue collar hobbies.

My grandpa told everyone to go to school and get an office job, so that his family would not be poorly-paid manual laborers forever.  He wanted to see us all rise above our humble ancestors, to pursue a better life than he had.  And yet, two generations on, many of us who took his advice and managed our money well now cherish the tools he used to make a living, and remember him fondly when we break a sweat using them.

Maybe his life of manual labor wasn't so bad.  I'm rather enjoying emulating it now that I'm retired.  But of course I recognize the differences inherent in the necessity of that labor.  I get to enjoy swinging a hammer all day because I don't have to swing a hammer all day.  He couldn't take rest days, if his kids wanted to eat.

I suspect the desire to cook and bake from scratch is similarly motivated by a certain sense of nostalgia.  My grandma was an Iowa dirt farmer who spent her early years cooking from scratch for 15 farm hands every day, and hated it.  She made a mean cherry pie, but never stopped complaining about how much she despised butchering and plucking chickens.  She might be just as mortified by my love of cooking and baking as grandpa would be of my calluses. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zikoris on May 25, 2019, 03:08:31 PM
I want to FIRE so I can knit the entire day every day. And so I can make ALL my food from scratch and spend the days cooking and baking .

What do you do now?

I find it almost comical how enthusiastic many of us are for adopting the drudgery of our grandparents.  I'm a PhD scientist who spent his career in federal service, sitting behind computer screens and presenting to academic audiences, and now that I'm retired I swing a hammer.  Suddenly I have calluses on my hands, and tendonitis in my elbows, and dirt under my fingernails.  I gave up a decidedly white collar life to pursue decidedly blue collar hobbies.

My grandpa told everyone to go to school and get an office job, so that his family would not be poorly-paid manual laborers forever.  He wanted to see us all rise above our humble ancestors, to pursue a better life than he had.  And yet, two generations on, many of us who took his advice and managed our money well now cherish the tools he used to make a living, and remember him fondly when we break a sweat using them.

Maybe his life of manual labor wasn't so bad.  I'm rather enjoying emulating it now that I'm retired.  But of course I recognize the differences inherent in the necessity of that labor.  I get to enjoy swinging a hammer all day because I don't have to swing a hammer all day.  He couldn't take rest days, if his kids wanted to eat.

I suspect the desire to cook and bake from scratch is similarly motivated by a certain sense of nostalgia.  My grandma was an Iowa dirt farmer who spent her early years cooking from scratch for 15 farm hands every day, and hated it.  She made a mean cherry pie, but never stopped complaining about how much she despised butchering and plucking chickens.  She might be just as mortified by my love of cooking and baking as grandpa would be of my calluses.

I find it kind of funny how the desire to cook from scratch kind of skipped a generation in my family. My grandparents were all excellent cook-from-scratchers. But neither of my parents, or my aunts or uncles are any good at it - they came of age during the time when convenience foods became really popular and common, so that was the way they learned to cook, and the type of stuff we were fed growing up. I wonder sometimes if the move away from home cooking was almost a form of rebellion against traditional homemaking, and then the next generation was like "Fuck this nasty convenience food, I want to make stuff that tastes good".

I do think it's kind of awesome how many young people these days are abandoning what they grew up eating and going back to "old school" cooking. I know a lot of people around my age now who have amazing cooking repertoires.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GermanStache on May 25, 2019, 03:13:39 PM
Another petty reason for wanting to FIRE - I want the time to cook sourdough bread properly.
YES!!!! Me too :-)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Hula Hoop on May 25, 2019, 03:43:24 PM
My grandma also hated cooking.  She cooked and baked but from necessity in order to feed 4 kids. A lot of household chores were much harder when she was young though from plucking chickens, to boiling the laundry in a huge tub to knitting socks and making clothes for the entire family. My parents cooked because they had to in order to feed us but both worked full time in all consuming jobs.  When I was in my teens I took an interest in cooking (partly because I was sick of the fish sticks and powdered mashed potato that my mother served up) and I had basically taken over family cooking and shopping by age 15-16.  My mother was a single mother who worked long hours.  For a while, I entertained the idea of becoming a chef, but working part time as a kitchen hand in a restaurant cured me of that desire. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GermanStache on May 25, 2019, 03:45:01 PM
I want to FIRE so I can knit the entire day every day. And so I can make ALL my food from scratch and spend the days cooking and baking .

What do you do now?

I knit for maybe one hour a day and manage to make some foods from scratch. I do not have time for more since I am away for 12 hours a day including my commute.

I don´t quite understand what you are getting at with your post... maybe because english is my second language. Do you find my reasons stupid or funny??
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GermanStache on May 25, 2019, 04:19:25 PM
when I say cooking from scratch I mean this not in a Laura-Ingalls-kind-of-way. Cooking from scratch today has nothing to do with the tedious ways our grandmothers had to do it every single day. Neither do i boil my clothes in a pot nor do I HAVE to sew clothing for the family.... But I enjoy sewing but don´t have the time to do so. That was my point which apparently didn´t come out right by the comments this prompted....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Trifele on May 25, 2019, 05:52:26 PM
@GermanStache, I think your points about knitting and cooking came across very well.  I think the comments were just exploring why many of us (myself included) long to do more manual labor.  And often (almost always?) that longing is felt by white collar/professional workers who didn't have to do it as part of their paid work. 

I just retired a short time ago, and I spend at least four hours a day working in my garden and orchard.  But professionally I worked a desk job.  All those years staring at a computer at work, I dreamed of getting my fill in the garden every day.  But if I had instead worked for pay as a farm laborer, I might be spending my retirement differently.

ETA I think "petty" might be the wrong word for this interesting phenomenon . . . Personally it feels deep and fulfilling.  A bit ironic maybe?   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on May 25, 2019, 07:29:42 PM
I want to FIRE so I can knit the entire day every day. And so I can make ALL my food from scratch and spend the days cooking and baking .

What do you do now?

I knit for maybe one hour a day and manage to make some foods from scratch. I do not have time for more since I am away for 12 hours a day including my commute.

No, I meant what kind of job do you have now, that prevents you from knitting and cooking?  I ask because I have found that many working people aspire to do things that are different from their regular day jobs.  If you are a short order cook in a diner, you probably don't dream about cooking from scratch for fun.

Quote
I don´t quite understand what you are getting at with your post... maybe because english is my second language. Do you find my reasons stupid or funny??

No, I do not find them stupid or funny at all.  I also look forward to spending my free time doing things that my ancestors considered tiresome chores.  That was kind of the point I was trying to make, that many of us now do this stuff for fun.  We have learned a different set of values than what my grandparents had.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: EscapeVelocity2020 on May 25, 2019, 08:11:18 PM
One of the biggest ironies of ER is that folks feel a need to rush to retirement because time is so precious.  Then, once they retire, they do things like ride a bike instead of get that thing done quicker in a car, grow food instead of grab fresh produce, walk and contemplate how fast life is nowadays...  I guess I understand that time is easier to waste when you are 'free', but I totally get Sol's comment about 'why can't folks enjoy all this time the modern era has given us' while we are working as a gateway to enjoying ER.

But as a disclaimer, I'm FI and not ER and it is working out pretty great for me.  These forums and the online community in general isn't like the real world because failures don't voluntarily let themselves be known.  If a future society looks at Facebook and Instagram, they will be really confused as to why Humanity did not protect this beautiful planet and our fantastic existence on it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zikoris on May 25, 2019, 08:47:59 PM
My grandma also hated cooking.  She cooked and baked but from necessity in order to feed 4 kids. A lot of household chores were much harder when she was young though from plucking chickens, to boiling the laundry in a huge tub to knitting socks and making clothes for the entire family. My parents cooked because they had to in order to feed us but both worked full time in all consuming jobs.  When I was in my teens I took an interest in cooking (partly because I was sick of the fish sticks and powdered mashed potato that my mother served up) and I had basically taken over family cooking and shopping by age 15-16.  My mother was a single mother who worked long hours.  For a while, I entertained the idea of becoming a chef, but working part time as a kitchen hand in a restaurant cured me of that desire.

I did the same as a teenager. The funny thing is, well into adulthood I still believed I was just a super picky eater, because I hated and refused to eat nearly everything my parents cooked, and mostly subsisted on sandwiches, cereal, and raw fruit/veg from our garden and fruit trees/bushes. Well, it turns out I'm not a picky eater at all, they're just terrible cooks!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on May 26, 2019, 04:40:03 AM
@GermanStache, I think your points about knitting and cooking came across very well.  I think the comments were just exploring why many of us (myself included) long to do more manual labor.  And often (almost always?) that longing is felt by white collar/professional workers who didn't have to do it as part of their paid work. 

I just retired a short time ago, and I spend at least four hours a day working in my garden and orchard.  But professionally I worked a desk job.  All those years staring at a computer at work, I dreamed of getting my fill in the garden every day.  But if I had instead worked for pay as a farm laborer, I might be spending my retirement differently.

ETA I think "petty" might be the wrong word for this interesting phenomenon . . . Personally it feels deep and fulfilling.  A bit ironic maybe?   

I get this, but the opposite way.
I work with my hands all day and after a few years of doing it full time, it got pretty tedious...and physically exhausting.

My FIRE fantasies were filled with consulting work for non profits and academia, executive committees, proposal writing, and presentations.

I have zero romanticism about working with my hands, it's just what I do to get things done. To this day I deeply despise stacking firewood, and can't wait for my parents to finally move to the city so that I never have to haul insect covered logs ever again.

I do cook everything from scratch, but you couldn't pay me to garden.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Hula Hoop on May 26, 2019, 05:00:56 AM
My grandma also hated cooking.  She cooked and baked but from necessity in order to feed 4 kids. A lot of household chores were much harder when she was young though from plucking chickens, to boiling the laundry in a huge tub to knitting socks and making clothes for the entire family. My parents cooked because they had to in order to feed us but both worked full time in all consuming jobs.  When I was in my teens I took an interest in cooking (partly because I was sick of the fish sticks and powdered mashed potato that my mother served up) and I had basically taken over family cooking and shopping by age 15-16.  My mother was a single mother who worked long hours.  For a while, I entertained the idea of becoming a chef, but working part time as a kitchen hand in a restaurant cured me of that desire.

I did the same as a teenager. The funny thing is, well into adulthood I still believed I was just a super picky eater, because I hated and refused to eat nearly everything my parents cooked, and mostly subsisted on sandwiches, cereal, and raw fruit/veg from our garden and fruit trees/bushes. Well, it turns out I'm not a picky eater at all, they're just terrible cooks!

Ha ha - same here.  Actually each of parents is not a bad cook when they put in the effort but the problem was that they are both kind of workaholics so their work always came first.  Food was just a way to keep body and soul together.  My parents each put in some effort and made nice food for holidays though.

I'm more of a "llive to eat" kind of person.  I remember as a teenager making home made pasta, pad thai, 7 layer cakes, osso buco, chicken liver pate and quenelles.  I used to pore over recipe books and attempt to make the foods that appealed to me.  As a side effect, I became a pretty good home cook so I started making dinner most nights for the family as a teenager.  My mother often worked late or travelled for work so she was very happy to let me do the shopping and cooking.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: mstr d on May 26, 2019, 05:20:01 AM
I don't want to have any clue what day of the week it is.

This is awesome. But it also has some downsides. I know exactly when it's my girlfriends birthday, I just didn't know what day it was when it happend to be that day :p. oeps sorry my love.

My reason to fire because I disn't like that other people had control over me what I had to do or coudn't do.

I still can't do sirten things by law. But I don't mind those things.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Money Badger on May 26, 2019, 06:15:25 AM
(Sub)Human Resources. 

People who exist solely to perpetuate HR legal CYA evidence and distracting corporate compliance BS to protect the asses of the wealthy from the “revenue generating units” actually creating value.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: johndoe on May 26, 2019, 07:02:18 AM
* Not feeling watched by coworkers if I dare to have Youtube playing music in the background.
* Not staring out the window at the sunny day I am missing thanks to working hours.
* Not scanning Reddit because I am required to be in that seat, even if I don't have work to do.

My reason is to get away from people who think things like these are acceptable on the clock (frequently).  I work at a public org, so I can't help but think the tax money becoming their salaries is a waste.  I have to hear them blabber on for hours per day about non-work issues, only do the bare minimum, and complain 24/7 (especially when they actually have to do something above and beyond) .  I've come to accept that I'm in the minority to feel this way, but if you aren't motivated by your job why not quit?  Pull on the rope, buy some headphones, get to work, keep yourself mentally stimulated, feel some pride from achievement.   Don't bring the rest of us down.

In other news, I should probably learn to accept their behavior as "normal" so it doesn't go from my "petty" reason to a serious motivation for FIRE!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on May 26, 2019, 07:17:58 AM
* Not feeling watched by coworkers if I dare to have Youtube playing music in the background.
* Not staring out the window at the sunny day I am missing thanks to working hours.
* Not scanning Reddit because I am required to be in that seat, even if I don't have work to do.

My reason is to get away from people who think things like these are acceptable on the clock (frequently).  I work at a public org, so I can't help but think the tax money becoming their salaries is a waste.  I have to hear them blabber on for hours per day about non-work issues, only do the bare minimum, and complain 24/7 (especially when they actually have to do something above and beyond) .  I've come to accept that I'm in the minority to feel this way, but if you aren't motivated by your job why not quit?  Pull on the rope, buy some headphones, get to work, keep yourself mentally stimulated, feel some pride from achievement.   Don't bring the rest of us down.

In other news, I should probably learn to accept their behavior as "normal" so it doesn't go from my "petty" reason to a serious motivation for FIRE!

It really, really depends on the job.

For some jobs, some people can actually deliver at a much higher level of they aren't focused all the time. I have a job where time is money. If I'm not focused and working, I'm not billing. However, DH has a job where taking a 20 minute break to grab a coffee and go for a walk outside is critical to his brain being able to generate the ideas he needs to generate. Sometimes he will just zone out at his desk with headphones and music or read articles, but it's all to let the brain percolate in the background.

Anyone who does anything even remotely creative will tell you the same thing: the break minutes are even more important than the work minutes.

If someone is highly productive, it's not a waste. For some, trying to force every minute to be productive will actually tank their ability to produce.

It depends on the work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ApacheStache on May 26, 2019, 08:40:14 AM
Looking forward to FIRE so I no longer need to hear the new guy sitting next to me aggressively clear his throat every 5 minutes. FFS man, get a lozenge, tea, water or something. Hearing him chew his food with his mouth open and scarf down his lunch like a ravenous food-deprived lion is also a big motivating factor.

My first question was going to be if you live in China, and then I realized you live in a Denver. What you describe is so common here I’ve become desensitized to it. Only the really really loud chewers and slurpers bother me.

It's funny you say that, this new guy is from China. He's good at what he does, but man alive his "table manners" could use some grooming.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on May 26, 2019, 08:41:18 AM
Quote from: Malkynn link=topic=103598.msg2381787#msg2381787
If someone is highly productive, it's not a waste. For some, trying to force every minute to be productive will actually tank their ability to produce.

It depends on the work.

Now that I am retired, I am ever so grateful that I no longer have to think of my time in terms of my "ability to produce".

I get to live instead, and I truly appreciate doing so without any sense of obligation or guilt.  I'm still busy, and productive, but only because I genuinely want to be and not because I'm supposed to be.  It's just such a dramatic change in the narrative of my day, from the other side, but it wasn't at all obvious to me while I was still working how much of my time I spent managing myself for reasons like this, for someone else's benefit. It's another one of those little wonderful surprises of retirement that I was not expecting.  It's changed my perspective on so many unexpected things.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Sailor Sam on May 26, 2019, 09:42:40 AM
I don't want to do no more OOD rounds. Ever, ever again.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: johndoe on May 26, 2019, 10:06:52 AM
Anyone who does anything even remotely creative will tell you the same thing: the break minutes are even more important than the work minutes.
...
For some, trying to force every minute to be productive will actually tank their ability to produce.

Good points, and I'm sure everyone is wired differently even if they're creative / problem solvers.  I imagine it's a "shades of grey" issue; everyone is going to have 5 minute conversations, use restroom, stretch, go on a walk around the building, etc.  What I take issue with is the people who have these 5 minute conversations with 20 people, always have time for walking breaks, complain about company issues, complain about personal issues, talk about films for hours, blah blah.  In my mind if the company says "you get x minutes per day to break" .... that's it.  When you're supposed to work 90% and break 10% I have a problem if you work 10% and break 90%.

I guess one part of me wants the organization / all tax money to be spent as efficiently as possible.  The other part of me says "just accept that people aren't going to live up to your expectations".  I think personally I need to meet in the middle somewhere, but am not sure how to convince myself =)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: 2sk22 on May 26, 2019, 10:12:53 AM
I'd like to spend more time with my Lego, to be honest.

Heh - I keep several trays of LEGO technics piece on my desk and play with it when I'm thinking about a hard problem. I find that keeping my fingers busy really helps !
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on May 26, 2019, 02:13:51 PM
Anyone who does anything even remotely creative will tell you the same thing: the break minutes are even more important than the work minutes.
...
For some, trying to force every minute to be productive will actually tank their ability to produce.

Good points, and I'm sure everyone is wired differently even if they're creative / problem solvers.  I imagine it's a "shades of grey" issue; everyone is going to have 5 minute conversations, use restroom, stretch, go on a walk around the building, etc.  What I take issue with is the people who have these 5 minute conversations with 20 people, always have time for walking breaks, complain about company issues, complain about personal issues, talk about films for hours, blah blah.  In my mind if the company says "you get x minutes per day to break" .... that's it.  When you're supposed to work 90% and break 10% I have a problem if you work 10% and break 90%.

I guess one part of me wants the organization / all tax money to be spent as efficiently as possible.  The other part of me says "just accept that people aren't going to live up to your expectations".  I think personally I need to meet in the middle somewhere, but am not sure how to convince myself =)

I have no doubt that you have plenty of legitimate examples of people wasting company time. I only objected to you generalizing that it's universally somehow wrong, since you were initially responding to someone else whose workplace conduct you categorized as unacceptable, which I felt was unfair as a generalization.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: John Galt incarnate! on May 26, 2019, 02:50:33 PM


  All those years staring at a computer at work, I dreamed of getting my fill in the garden every day. 



When my sister retires she wants to spend lots of time in her garden.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: kei te pai on May 26, 2019, 06:33:00 PM
Time in the garden can not be considered a petty thing!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Wrenchturner on May 26, 2019, 07:07:17 PM
I don't really like wearing pants.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: John Galt incarnate! on May 26, 2019, 08:49:45 PM
Time in the garden can not be considered a petty thing!

I think of gardening as a relaxing pastime for those who like it  and one of FIRE's rewards for having long endured the stress and sundry aggravations of working. 

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Gremlin on May 26, 2019, 08:51:23 PM
If I chose to FIRE solely so I could win this thread, would that be considered petty enough?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Engineer93 on May 27, 2019, 04:19:32 AM
I love taking a nap.  When I retire I plan to take one every day.  Can’t do that right now with work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: JoJo on May 27, 2019, 10:22:45 AM
there are a couple guys in the office that have nasty throat clearing noises.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Channel-Z on May 27, 2019, 07:40:14 PM
I imagine my pettiest reasons involve not wanting to be around my loud co-workers, my cackling co-workers, those with deep coughs, and so on. I would like to be able to ditch the 90-day password rule, but my bank requires it too.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ysette9 on May 27, 2019, 09:46:14 PM
My boss is a heavy smoker and smells appallingly like an old ash tray after a smoke break. I can barely stand to be in his presence during these times.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on May 28, 2019, 10:29:05 AM
If I chose to FIRE solely so I could win this thread, would that be considered petty enough?

Sounds pretty petty to me. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SwordGuy on May 28, 2019, 02:52:56 PM
I am surprised no one has mentioned office radio yet. Having to listen to the radio at work is probably my least favourite part of being employed.

Where I worked there would often be someone listening to the constant venom spewed by right-wing talking heads.  So very glad I never have to listen to that hate-filled, ignorant clap-trap ever again.

Or Fox "infotainment" masquerading as news. 

==

Never having to listen to someone go on and on about some sports ball team in agonizing detail.   Over and over again, one game after another.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ender on June 02, 2019, 07:38:06 PM
Time in the garden can not be considered a petty thing!

Especially since the best time to be in the garden is when you are at work :(
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on June 02, 2019, 10:59:41 PM
My boss is a heavy smoker and smells appallingly like an old ash tray after a smoke break. I can barely stand to be in his presence during these times.
OMG, this is the opposite of petty, especially for a pregnant woman. How do you stand it???
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on June 03, 2019, 04:55:02 AM
I thought of a good one.  I'm the youngest sibling by 7 and 9 years, and I want to retire earlier than either of them and with more money.

To be fair I do egg both of them on to save more, but I still want to win!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on June 03, 2019, 05:13:09 AM
Not sure whether I mentioned this before, but I want to experience some years of freedom in relative good health before more and more bodily decay that comes with old age sets in.

I have heard the same argument for people who lives as adventurers (with some sponsor money). They want to live out their adventures, while they are still young and healthy.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ysette9 on June 03, 2019, 10:07:32 AM
Not sure whether I mentioned this before, but I want to experience some years of freedom in relative good health before more and more bodily decay that comes with old age sets in.

I have heard the same argument for people who lives as adventurers (with some sponsor money). They want to live out their adventures, while they are still young and healthy.
This isn’t petty at all in my mind but a fairly fundamental reason we should all want to seek FI.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ysette9 on June 03, 2019, 10:11:38 AM
My boss is a heavy smoker and smells appallingly like an old ash tray after a smoke break. I can barely stand to be in his presence during these times.
OMG, this is the opposite of petty, especially for a pregnant woman. How do you stand it???
It is slightly less awful now that I am last the stage of most scent sensitivity, but it is really tough. The weird thing for me is that I expect smoking to be treated with a bit of shame in our society and for smokers to not hide, but not flaunt their habit. My boss comes recently from a different country with a much higher smoking rate and he doesn’t seem to have picked up on this. The admittedly few people I have known who did smoke went to great lengths to hide their habits whereas my boss talks merrily on a revisit basis about smoke breaks.

I find myself wondering if there is a non-rude way to give him a JUUL ecig as a gift. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: mies on June 10, 2019, 04:19:13 AM
Open floor plan offices with low cubicle walls. Whoever invented them can eat a dick and die. They’re noisy, distracting, and awkward.

I hate always having someone in my line of sight especially when they are only 3 feet away. I managed to create a visual barrier so I’m not staring at the person on the other side of the cubicle wall all the time, but it doesn’t help with the noise.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on June 10, 2019, 04:59:13 AM
Open floor plan offices with low cubicle walls. Whoever invented them can eat a dick and die. They’re noisy, distracting, and awkward.

I hate always having someone in my line of sight especially when they are only 3 feet away. I managed to create a visual barrier so I’m not staring at the person on the other side of the cubicle wall all the time, but it doesn’t help with the noise.
On that same line, the terrible hissing noise that the ventilation is designed to produce all day every day as a noise barrier.  I just hate that noise so much!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: mies on June 10, 2019, 06:18:21 AM
Open floor plan offices with low cubicle walls. Whoever invented them can eat a dick and die. They’re noisy, distracting, and awkward.

I hate always having someone in my line of sight especially when they are only 3 feet away. I managed to create a visual barrier so I’m not staring at the person on the other side of the cubicle wall all the time, but it doesn’t help with the noise.
On that same line, the terrible hissing noise that the ventilation is designed to produce all day every day as a noise barrier.  I just hate that noise so much!

I could probably deal with the white noise. For me it’s the conversations and doors opening and closing. Those are Harder for me to ignore. Those little annoyances add up though. I get it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on June 10, 2019, 06:42:40 AM
I just received notes to clear for an audit that I did the work for three months ago. Apparently, my manager waited three months to go over my work and somehow thinks I'll be able to recall information from then. She's wanting notes on things that are irrelevant to the purpose of the audit.

Also, our busy season just started, so I have a plethora of other things to work on.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: fattest_foot on June 10, 2019, 08:31:37 AM
WTF, if your system remembers 13 old passwords, that has gotta be hackable.

If they're hashed properly it's not insecure to store X number of previous passwords, although 13 is excessive.  However, checking to see if a password is SIMILAR to a previous one means that the passwords are not hashed, and are retrievable by the system/a user, which is a BIG no-no in password security (password hashing is one way, even the system itself can't get a password back from it's hash).  That's a way worse security violation than reusing a password, or using a similar password.

Huh? Weird that I'd never thought about this before.

This is kind of frightening as it seems like every government system I have to log into check against around 10 of your last passwords. Not surprising I guess that my data has been stolen by the Chinese like a dozen times at this point.

Anyway, for another petty reason:

Had my mid-year performance review, and I'm tired of having to lie about what "professional development" I'm going to pursue. Or that I care whatsoever about doing "training." It's getting tiresome.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on June 11, 2019, 12:23:04 AM
Anyway, for another petty reason:

Had my mid-year performance review, and I'm tired of having to lie about what "professional development" I'm going to pursue. Or that I care whatsoever about doing "training." It's getting tiresome.

I recently had a performance review, but didn't get this question. We obviously don't have many career options, just a job.

My problem is that I often get excellent reviews, but am told that there is almost no money to give to those with the highest reviews. Luckily I don't need it anymore to FIRE next year.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: couponvan on June 11, 2019, 05:48:04 AM
I just received notes to clear for an audit that I did the work for three months ago. Apparently, my manager waited three months to go over my work and somehow thinks I'll be able to recall information from then. She's wanting notes on things that are irrelevant to the purpose of the audit.

Also, our busy season just started, so I have a plethora of other things to work on.
You just brought back daymares for me. Why does anyone think this is OK for the manager to do? Two weeks is the max it should ever be-or they should bring in another manager. But I am not doing busy season this year!!! I may go to the pool today just because I can. Happy FIRE....

Petty reason 1,001....so I don’t have to clear any more petty and stupid review notes.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bruin on June 11, 2019, 07:46:10 AM
My petty reason:

I want to say what I want to say about politics, religion, culture etc without having to be confined by a work place policy or normal.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Omy on June 11, 2019, 11:57:15 AM
My petty reason:

I want to say what I want to say about politics, religion, culture etc without having to be confined by a work place policy or normal.

Good one! As a realtor, I don't say anything political because people on both sides of the aisle need houses and I don't want to alienate anybody. But after FIREing in July, I could even volunteer for a campaign!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dmmms on June 11, 2019, 06:11:09 PM
So I don't have to pretend to care about some of the stupid stuff and things I'm expected to. No, I don't need your opinion or random thoughts about nothing of importance beyond this minuscule place and time in the grand scheme of everything.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: firestarter2018 on June 11, 2019, 08:49:34 PM
I love this thread so much. I actually like my job, but there are so many things I'm looking forward to filling my day with instead. Even just being able to sip my coffee at a leisurely pace instead of gulping it down and then scrambling to get a kid off to school and myself to work.

I'm also going to love never having to hear the corporate jargon that's particularly prevalent in my company. For some reason people like to say "planful," meaning "let's be thoughtful as we plan this new project/initiative out." It drives me NUTS.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: mies on June 12, 2019, 12:58:03 AM
I love this thread so much. I actually like my job, but there are so many things I'm looking forward to filling my day with instead. Even just being able to sip my coffee at a leisurely pace instead of gulping it down and then scrambling to get a kid off to school and myself to work.

I'm also going to love never having to hear the corporate jargon that's particularly prevalent in my company. For some reason people like to say "planful," meaning "let's be thoughtful as we plan this new project/initiative out." It drives me NUTS.

Planful? That’s just jibberish :D

I also won’t miss corporate word salad. One saying that really grates on me is when managers say “I have a big ask”, or “here’s my ask”. Damn it just use the word request like a normal person. Nobody would ever say stuff like that in real life if management wasn’t saying it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Nickyd£g on June 12, 2019, 06:02:37 AM
I actually enjoy my job, but not at the expense of having to actually spend time doing it, if that makes sense. Plus I find pretending to be enthusiastic and caring about stupid ideas and co-workers exhausting. I'm always "on". I just wanna read a fucking book in quiet with a nice cup of tea in my garden thanks.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on June 12, 2019, 06:43:36 AM
I actually enjoy don't really mind my job, but not at the expense of having to actually spend time doing it, if that makes sense. Plus I find pretending to be enthusiastic and caring about stupid ideas and co-workers exhausting. I'm always "on". I just wanna read a fucking book in quiet with a nice cup of tea in my garden thanks.

:-)

+1
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: John Galt incarnate! on June 12, 2019, 06:52:51 AM
Plus I find pretending to be enthusiastic and caring about stupid ideas and co-workers exhausting. I'm always "on".

One of my sisters told me she "hates having to be on."

She'll be a FIREee within a few years.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: 5Oclocksomewhere on June 12, 2019, 07:00:23 AM
Yesterday, while I was at my desk web-surfing at 4pm, I was going to write: "Having to be at my desk until 4:30, even though I will accomplish nothing else but surfing the web for the rest of the day."  And then I suddenly remembered I already gave notice that I was retiring. So instead, I just left. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on June 12, 2019, 07:14:05 AM
Yesterday, while I was at my desk web-surfing at 4pm, I was going to write: "Having to be at my desk until 4:30, even though I will accomplish nothing else but surfing the web for the rest of the day."  And then I suddenly remembered I already gave notice that I was retiring. So instead, I just left.
Good on you! When is your last day?

I just remembered, in a horrible flash, something else I don't miss. Call reports. OMG, I hated them! In sales, the numbers tell the story. If my numbers are good and my customers are happy, leave me the fuck alone! Expense reports are a close, but distant, second. I hated keeping track of all those paper receipts, but I was happy to drive a company car and have my cell phone paid for, so at least there was value for the time spent, unlike call reports. And banking those reimbursement checks was always mitigating fun.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FIRE 20/20 on June 12, 2019, 11:01:51 AM
Yesterday, while I was at my desk web-surfing at 4pm, I was going to write: "Having to be at my desk until 4:30, even though I will accomplish nothing else but surfing the web for the rest of the day."  And then I suddenly remembered I already gave notice that I was retiring. So instead, I just left.

I love this.  :)

For roughly the last year I was working, I just left work when I was done.  I probably averaged somewhere around 35-37 hours a week, and no one said anything.  I did have to burn down my PTO balance, but I valued those extra hours a lot more than I would have valued the PTO payout as part of my last paycheck. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: 5Oclocksomewhere on June 12, 2019, 12:05:17 PM
@Dicey - After my last day on July 5th, I will no longer be annoyed by that one sneaky co-worker who never cleans up after themselves and simply leaves their dirty dishes in the communal kitchen sink.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on June 12, 2019, 05:23:52 PM
@Dicey - After my last day on July 5th, I will no longer be annoyed by that one sneaky co-worker who never cleans up after themselves and simply leaves their dirty dishes in the communal kitchen sink.
I'm about ready to start just throwing all that crap in the trash.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Steeze on June 21, 2019, 05:54:12 PM
Today I was getting a rather deep cavity drilled and filled at the dentist. I was also having an unusually stressful day at work. I was trying to decide if I would rather have my teeth drilled Over and over again or keep going through these very stressful days. Which would be worse? I decided that the teeth drilling wasn’t all that bad, at least they numb your mouth first, and the dentist is nice enough.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MMM123 on June 23, 2019, 01:00:40 AM
Driving 200km a day
Missing all sunshine (at least in winter months)
Missing sundowner drinks at home
Grafting for other people's profit
Red tape
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on June 24, 2019, 12:43:51 AM
This time of the year: not having a/c in the office, in an office on the top floor, right under the roof, with large windows. I don't have a/c at home either but it's maybe 25C when it's 35C outside. At work it's 30+ and that's just too uncomfortable to work. I don't want to be a sweaty mess at work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bloop Bloop on June 24, 2019, 04:45:47 AM
Right now my partner and I miss out on every tax concession there is, because we are on above-average income. Once I retire and our passive income falls down to the 'average' range, we will suddenly be eligible for a huge raft of middle class welfare. Concessions left right and centre! It will be so nice to be able to be a sponger for once! I'm really looking forward to that.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on June 24, 2019, 05:49:39 AM
I never want to have to organise a software fix release ever again. Today we were told to make the next fix for our new release. Goodbye quiet summer period.
What I hate even more with summer time fix releases, is that others are planning this fix and the test periods in the weeks that I have protested against. It doesn't matter what I say, they don't take it into them.

I have experienced this before, coming back from a 4 week vacation and right into an FAT. Too much chaos and stress for me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on June 24, 2019, 06:01:19 AM
And another one. That I never again have to deal with company Skype meetings. It always takes at least 10 minutes before the sound works properly. Today, I tried to connect with the modern sound system in the meeting room. It sort of worked in the beginning and the customers who joined by skype heard us and we heard them, although they sometimes breathed a bit loudly. But during the meeting, many times the system complained about my network connection being too bad. I had to rejoin the skype meeting and after that it failed several times again. Until I gave up and plugged in a Jabra thing. At least, that worked. Never again I want to use bluetooth sound systems on a shitty network. And why does my PC have a shitty network connect in the first place? At my home all works fine, including wireless music systems.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: 2sk22 on June 24, 2019, 09:25:31 AM
I never want to have to organise a software fix release ever again. Today we were told to make the next fix for our new release. Goodbye quiet summer period.

I work on cloud stuff so no concept of fixed release times anymore - we are always releasing stuff. But I share your feelings about this. I have come to absolutely hate my daily 9:45am scrum - this is one of my main reasons for wanting to quit :-)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: profnot on June 24, 2019, 09:55:14 AM
I love not answering the phone.  For decades, I had to answer after the third ring if staff didn't get the phone first.

Now I might glance over to see who is calling. 

So nice not be interrupted all the time!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: erutio on June 24, 2019, 10:43:23 AM
Wow, this thread is awesome.  I would like to say though, some of these reasons are not petty at all and should be the main drivers for retiring early!

I thought of a petty reason today:  My closet is about 2/3 work clothes and 1/3 "civilian" clothes.  I want my whole closet back.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Nick_Miller on June 24, 2019, 12:13:07 PM
I would like to eat lunch at home and not have to rush through breakfast.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: solon on June 24, 2019, 12:20:38 PM
I just want to see some really big numbers on a spreadsheet.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on June 24, 2019, 11:33:47 PM
I never want to have to organise a software fix release ever again. Today we were told to make the next fix for our new release. Goodbye quiet summer period.

I work on cloud stuff so no concept of fixed release times anymore - we are always releasing stuff. But I share your feelings about this. I have come to absolutely hate my daily 9:45am scrum - this is one of my main reasons for wanting to quit :-)

I work with a safety critical system, so lots of official procedures to follow and meetings to have, thick test plans and test reports to produce, customers present at our tests and running a couple of days with live data and pretending real world usage. So a fix release is a couple of weeks extra work, even if we have the software fixed in an hour.

I hate my 12 o'clock scrum too. It is like having someone looking over your shoulder all day to see how much you work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: 2sk22 on June 25, 2019, 02:24:55 AM
I hate my 12 o'clock scrum too. It is like having someone looking over your shoulder all day to see how much you work.

Same :-) This feeling of having someone watching over your shoulder really grates on me!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: fattest_foot on June 25, 2019, 09:18:09 AM
I work on cloud stuff so no concept of fixed release times anymore - we are always releasing stuff. But I share your feelings about this. I have come to absolutely hate my daily 9:45am scrum - this is one of my main reasons for wanting to quit :-)

Our organization is in the process of implementing agile, and I've been telling people that it's going to burn people out and make them miserable. The group I used to be a part of used it, and while it's certainly amazing at pumping out a lot of work in a hurry, in my opinion it's at the detriment to the employees.

I already dislike our weekly "status" meeting. Having to do a meeting every single day would probably be the breaking point for me (luckily I don't do software dev, so no worries yet about daily scrums).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Candace on June 25, 2019, 10:23:05 AM
Yesterday, while I was at my desk web-surfing at 4pm, I was going to write: "Having to be at my desk until 4:30, even though I will accomplish nothing else but surfing the web for the rest of the day."  And then I suddenly remembered I already gave notice that I was retiring. So instead, I just left.
This is hilarious.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: shadesofgreen on June 27, 2019, 11:13:41 AM
My grandma also hated cooking.  She cooked and baked but from necessity in order to feed 4 kids. A lot of household chores were much harder when she was young though from plucking chickens, to boiling the laundry in a huge tub to knitting socks and making clothes for the entire family. My parents cooked because they had to in order to feed us but both worked full time in all consuming jobs.  When I was in my teens I took an interest in cooking (partly because I was sick of the fish sticks and powdered mashed potato that my mother served up) and I had basically taken over family cooking and shopping by age 15-16.  My mother was a single mother who worked long hours.  For a while, I entertained the idea of becoming a chef, but working part time as a kitchen hand in a restaurant cured me of that desire.

I did the same as a teenager. The funny thing is, well into adulthood I still believed I was just a super picky eater, because I hated and refused to eat nearly everything my parents cooked, and mostly subsisted on sandwiches, cereal, and raw fruit/veg from our garden and fruit trees/bushes. Well, it turns out I'm not a picky eater at all, they're just terrible cooks!

Ha ha - same here.  Actually each of parents is not a bad cook when they put in the effort but the problem was that they are both kind of workaholics so their work always came first.  Food was just a way to keep body and soul together.  My parents each put in some effort and made nice food for holidays though.

I'm more of a "llive to eat" kind of person.  I remember as a teenager making home made pasta, pad thai, 7 layer cakes, osso buco, chicken liver pate and quenelles.  I used to pore over recipe books and attempt to make the foods that appealed to me.  As a side effect, I became a pretty good home cook so I started making dinner most nights for the family as a teenager.  My mother often worked late or travelled for work so she was very happy to let me do the shopping and cooking.

Right there with you both but I was cooking full meals at 7. My parents divorced and mom worked really long hours so if I wanted to eat I would cook for myself and my older brother. This was the early 80's so I would read our Bettycrocker cookbook and or the packaging instructions and cook. I still own that cookbook, every once in a while I will bake something out of it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Sugaree on June 28, 2019, 06:05:27 AM
I'm sitting at work desperately watching the clock tick down to 10:30 so I can get out of here and go diving.  In a cold, boring, dark quarry where the fish bite.  I wanna be in the islands.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DeskJockey2028 on June 28, 2019, 07:21:12 AM
People keep microwaving fish.

Not daily, not even weekly, but about 1 to 2 times a month.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Nick_Miller on June 28, 2019, 08:12:57 AM
I really don't like dressing in work clothes. Anything more than shorts and a tee shirt is too much for me.

Can confirm.  Dressing like a broke college kid every day is pretty great.

A lot of the other stuff, though, is not what everyone seems to think it will be.  I still know what day of the week it is, because I still have kids in school and I'm still involved in a variety of community activities.  I also don't sleep in very often, for the exact same reasons.  Grocery shopping at 9am this morning was pretty sweet, that part is totally true.  Also, Sunday evenings are not stress-inducing anymore because I have nothing to dread.

But my retirement is not the lazy life of leisure some people imagine it will be.  At least for me, there has been a very limited amount of napping and sleeping late.  I don't watch television.  I don't go fishing, or drink beer all day, or go days and days without engaging with society.  I'm still doing stuff, it's just not stuff I have to do from the inside of a cubicle.  On the bright side, it's stuff I want to do and not stuff I have to do, so I don't really mind being busy.

Early retirement doesn't absolve you of all responsibility, the way a bunch of people in this thread seem to think it will.  If anything, it makes you more responsible, not less, because it forces you to identify what you're going to do with your time and your life instead of just blindly following orders day in and day out.  You have to decide what you're going to do and then you have to do it, because you said you would, and it reflects poorly on you as a person to not do so.  In some ways, being a corporate drone is easier.  Just show up every day and do what they tell you, and take home money.  There is no existential crisis, no search for meaning or purpose, there is only the inevitable suffering of servitude.  There is security and predictability in that.

To be fair, I think most of this comes down to having kids. Having kids changes absolutely everything (as both you and I know). A single, retired person sans kids can do 40 freakin' hours of volunteer work per week and STILL have a crapload of time to do whatever they want. But when you are caring for younglings, they and their schedules/needs just dominate so much of the parent's time, whether or not they are working. And when they aren't directly dominating your time, they are dominating your thoughts/plans. Heck, many SAHPs will say caring for kids is harder than working in the first place.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: A Fella from Stella on June 28, 2019, 09:02:18 AM
Yesterday, while I was at my desk web-surfing at 4pm, I was going to write: "Having to be at my desk until 4:30, even though I will accomplish nothing else but surfing the web for the rest of the day."  And then I suddenly remembered I already gave notice that I was retiring. So instead, I just left.
This is hilarious.

OMG, that's awesome.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sol on June 28, 2019, 10:25:32 AM
Heck, many SAHPs will say caring for kids is harder than working in the first place.

Depends on what your job is, I suppose.  There's a comedian named Bill Burr who has a whole bit about "being a mother is the most difficult job on the planet."  tl:dr; he thinks there are harder jobs.

video contains moderate profanity, and is taken woefully out of context here so don't get too bent out of shape about perceived sexism:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoJrMaFlxOk
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Fomerly known as something on June 28, 2019, 10:35:28 AM
High school classmates — Yeah, so maybe it's been 25 years and they don't know or even care, but I get satisfaction thinking about being retired early while those assholes (some of them) are still working. You said petty, right? Oh yeah, though it turns out that a lot of the people that I thought were assholes because I didn't fit in and wasn't popular are actually really nice people... sooooo.... maybe I'm the asshole?
People change with time :)  I like to think I was a pretty good kid, but I like to think I'm a lot nicer and more mature now.

In addition to retired, I'll also be skinnier because I can walk in the woods for as long as I want each day.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: A Fella from Stella on June 28, 2019, 11:00:01 AM
FAMILY
I'd love to have millions to share with them, so they can eat down all of that nonsense they've said/thought of us, and feel it pass through like hot-sauce-diarrhea. Perhaps they'd have to take FPU in exchange for $10,000 (enough to go, but not enough to change their lives without working the plan). Maybe we'd add $5,000 to all of their kids' 529 plans (one of them got college money earmarked for my kid, but, hey, I'm not bitter about it). Perhaps I'd just pay off their debts so they can see that they suck, especially when they rack it all up again.

ORGS
Things like the local "business of the year" are a scam. You pay money and then get it. I'd create a fake business and apply, complete with advertising in the paper, or on the TV, and then expose them for the crooks they are.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: A Fella from Stella on June 28, 2019, 12:38:52 PM
High school classmates — Yeah, so maybe it's been 25 years and they don't know or even care, but I get satisfaction thinking about being retired early while those assholes (some of them) are still working. You said petty, right? Oh yeah, though it turns out that a lot of the people that I thought were assholes because I didn't fit in and wasn't popular are actually really nice people... sooooo.... maybe I'm the asshole?
People change with time :)  I like to think I was a pretty good kid, but I like to think I'm a lot nicer and more mature now.

In addition to retired, I'll also be skinnier because I can walk in the woods for as long as I want each day.


That's a beautiful vision, man. I hope you get it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on June 28, 2019, 01:34:29 PM
Heck, many SAHPs will say caring for kids is harder than working in the first place.

Depends on what your job is, I suppose.  There's a comedian named Bill Burr who has a whole bit about "being a mother is the most difficult job on the planet."  tl:dr; he thinks there are harder jobs.

video contains moderate profanity, and is taken woefully out of context here so don't get too bent out of shape about perceived sexism:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoJrMaFlxOk
Loved it!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: IslandFiGirl on June 28, 2019, 09:27:30 PM
My most petty reason for seeking FIRE?

I am tired of having to get dressed for work everyday!  I don't even really have to dress up but I can't stand not being able to just throw on yoga pants, tank top and flip flops!  First world problems, for sure!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bearblastbeats on June 28, 2019, 09:32:03 PM
My most petty reason for seeking FIRE?

I am tired of having to get dressed for work everyday!  I don't even really have to dress up but I can't stand not being able to just throw on yoga pants, tank top and flip flops!  First world problems, for sure!

Same exact thing here. Whenever I come home I immediately put on basket ball shorts and a t shirt.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: innkeeper77 on June 28, 2019, 11:48:51 PM
My petty reason:

I want to say what I want to say about politics, religion, culture etc without having to be confined by a work place policy or normal.

Good one! As a realtor, I don't say anything political because people on both sides of the aisle need houses and I don't want to alienate anybody. But after FIREing in July, I could even volunteer for a campaign!

Our realtor threw a Christmas party raffle to raise money to donate to counter trump organizations, and was publicly pissed off in 2016.

This is the third time he is getting a commission from us, and his willingness to be public about politics is one of the main reasons that we stuck with him after the first house... (That, and he did a good job, gave us a good deal each time, and treated us no differently from anyone else even though we were young and didn't  publicly appear to have money so most other realtors brushed us off)

So, Im not telling you that you have to change, but if you wanted to be real and authentic, there just may be a place in the market for you to do so while still working!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Omy on June 29, 2019, 06:29:50 AM
That's a great story, innkeeper77! I wish I had the courage to do that. There's a realtor in my office who is obnoxiously pro-trump on social media and it hasn't served him well in our mostly blue state. Being FI I might have been able to be more publicly anti-trump, except that a lot of my business is in a redder part of the state.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on June 30, 2019, 12:57:04 AM
That's a great story, innkeeper77! I wish I had the courage to do that. There's a realtor in my office who is obnoxiously pro-trump on social media and it hasn't served him well in our mostly blue state. Being FI I might have been able to be more publicly anti-trump, except that a lot of my business is in a redder part of the state.
Hmmm, I've bought and sold at least ten houses, probably more, and not once have I discussed politics with a realtor. How hard is it to keep your political position to yourself? I could care less what my realtor's political opinions are, as long as they're a damn good realtor.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on June 30, 2019, 05:06:45 AM
That's a great story, innkeeper77! I wish I had the courage to do that. There's a realtor in my office who is obnoxiously pro-trump on social media and it hasn't served him well in our mostly blue state. Being FI I might have been able to be more publicly anti-trump, except that a lot of my business is in a redder part of the state.
Hmmm, I've bought and sold at least ten houses, probably more, and not once have I discussed politics with a realtor. How hard is it to keep your political position to yourself? I could care less what my realtor's political opinions are, as long as they're a damn good realtor.

If your realtor like to talk politics with you as the seller, he/she might also start talking politics to potential buyers. That might annoy the buyers who are only interested in buying a house and you could loose the customer.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Raenia on June 30, 2019, 06:22:33 AM
That's a great story, innkeeper77! I wish I had the courage to do that. There's a realtor in my office who is obnoxiously pro-trump on social media and it hasn't served him well in our mostly blue state. Being FI I might have been able to be more publicly anti-trump, except that a lot of my business is in a redder part of the state.
Hmmm, I've bought and sold at least ten houses, probably more, and not once have I discussed politics with a realtor. How hard is it to keep your political position to yourself? I could care less what my realtor's political opinions are, as long as they're a damn good realtor.

If your realtor like to talk politics with you as the seller, he/she might also start talking politics to potential buyers. That might annoy the buyers who are only interested in buying a house and you could loose the customer.

I agree, just because it works for that one realtor doesn't make it a good idea generally.  Our realtor kept his opinions to himself, but our home inspector made us very uncomfortable with some comments about Muslims.  I would not use that company again, or would request a different inspector in the future, because of it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Omy on June 30, 2019, 08:33:04 AM
I agree...talking politics and religion is not a good idea if you serve the public and I always shut my trap on those subjects. But there have been times on social media where I would have liked to have responded to a pro-trump meme that was completely false that was propogated by my colleague. Instead I ignore the (usually) hateful pro-trump crap and feel that somehow I am part of the problem by not calling him out. When I retire, I can choose to say "fake news" and move on.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: A Fella from Stella on June 30, 2019, 08:56:31 AM
That's a great story, innkeeper77! I wish I had the courage to do that. There's a realtor in my office who is obnoxiously pro-trump on social media and it hasn't served him well in our mostly blue state. Being FI I might have been able to be more publicly anti-trump, except that a lot of my business is in a redder part of the state.
Hmmm, I've bought and sold at least ten houses, probably more, and not once have I discussed politics with a realtor. How hard is it to keep your political position to yourself? I could care less what my realtor's political opinions are, as long as they're a damn good realtor.

What turns me off is that people freak out even if you agree.

2016 EXAMPLE: family members are talking pro-liberal politics. I chime in with "I like Sanders," and start getting yelled at.

I didn't discuss my new line of FUCK KILLARY t-shirts. All I said was "I like Sanders," to which anyone could have shrugged, or said "why do you like him?"
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mesmoiselle on July 02, 2019, 01:08:05 PM
Hate commuting

Hate having to be anywhere by a certain time. Ever. I even resent movie theaters for making me be somewhere by a certain time

Hate having to be out of the house before noon.

Hate having to be aware of appearance and smell

Hate not having endless hours to write fanfiction
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: js82 on July 02, 2019, 06:58:44 PM
Not having to listen to people question why I'm skipping pizza/doughnuts in favor of healthy food choices.

That s**t got old a long time ago.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: enFuego on July 02, 2019, 09:01:15 PM
Not having to buy large quantities of undershirts for work... they're so damn expensive for such a simple item that brings me no real satisfaction.  Eventually they shrink and turn gray and Oxi and bleach only do so much... It's a struggle to get them on sale.  I don't mind wearing them... it's just paying so much for them that pisses me off.

Dealing with a**holes on the train.  I swear that normal nice people, whose company you would enjoy in another setting, turn into slimy weasels and become completely insensitive to other's personal space and any possible sense of community once they have to jockey for position to get their seat on the 'effing ride home.... grrrrr!  (Oh and by the way, when the train is running late, it's NOT ACTUALLY the conductor's fault - stop yelling at him/her.  In case you haven't noticed they ride the train just like you and don't control anything.)  I swear the day I retire I will actually flip off every single dang person as I walk off the train for the last time.

Waking up whenever my body is ready rather than to an alarm clock.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: lollylegs on July 02, 2019, 10:18:16 PM
not having to fill out a form for every little request - god I miss the 'olden' days when you just phoned up and spoke to a real person.  so far my IT request that would take 10 minutes has been over a week and is low priority - no, I am not allowed to speak to the IT guy - in the meantime there is a whole lot of work getting backlogged. - then there is the grumpy maintenance guy - fill out an online request to move a filing cabinet from one room to another down the hall....  well its a long way down the list, so could be a few weeks... and so it goes on and on to every department now...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chranstronaut on July 03, 2019, 01:24:56 PM
Being given an emergency project, working my ass off to cover it while the usual person is out of the office and then waiting... waiting... waiting for the customer to get back to me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Trimatty471 on July 07, 2019, 08:49:09 PM
No more annual reviews!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on July 07, 2019, 11:32:54 PM
To be able to say or write: I am on a continuous vacation. (Followed by a big smile)

I have seen this from other persioners. They seem to enjoy it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MrsStubble on July 08, 2019, 02:03:18 AM
unfortunately specific to my occupation, but so i never have to hear another IT leader say “shift left” ever again in my life.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Warlord1986 on July 08, 2019, 01:26:07 PM
You know that IT security training you take every time you land a new job? It’s half an hour and you can’t just leave it on, walk away, then return to answer five questions designed to flummox old people because the training makes you keep pushing the ‘next’ button. I hate that madness. Hate it. I will be so glad when I never have to take it again.

I also hate new co-workers who interrupt me when I’m doing something to ‘train’ me. By telling me to do that thing I just did.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FunkyChopstick on July 08, 2019, 03:20:37 PM
Just in general, trading the majority of my waking hours for 2-4 weeks out of the year to do as I please it not cutting it. I think I will always work but just not have to work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FIREstache on July 08, 2019, 04:54:47 PM

Unproductive wasted time in mandatory meetings, listening to the guy yawning, gagging on flem, using speakerphone, etc. through the wall in the next office down the hall, and having to change the temperature in my office because cleaning staff or whoever changes it overnight.  In general, dealing with people at work including vendors, partners, etc.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on July 08, 2019, 06:20:25 PM
Just in general, trading the majority of my waking hours for 2-4 weeks out of the year to do as I please it not cutting it. I think I will always work but just not have to work.
That doesn't sound petty to me at all.  It's a really really good reason to seek FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AlanStache on July 08, 2019, 07:17:35 PM
I am currently on work travel with my boss, tonight at dinner I said something about wanting a 2k$ e-bike to commute to work with but am not sure I would use it enough to justify it.  He replied with "just get it you make good money - no kids, it would be fun".  I was just sober and smart enough to not say " but I would like to tell you to f-off someday".  He is a good guy and a good boss but sharing any FIRE goals would not be a wise move. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: enFuego on July 08, 2019, 07:56:14 PM
No more annual reviews!

OMG Yes!  I used to work a a very well known megacorp and the review cycle went like this...

Annual reviews were performed at the end of the calendar year.  Bonuses were paid the last paycheck in December and raises were effective as of January 1.  My self-evaluation needed to be done in the October-November timeframe.  However, in order to allow the company to have sufficient time for planning/budgeting and all the logistics of managing 40,000+ employee reviews, managers needed to complete their evaluations of their direct reports in September.  Those of you keeping score at home are correct... my manager needed to decide my final rating before I even started thinking about my self-evaluation!  Tell me if that doesn't motivate someone to believe in the process...

In addition, the review cycle was followed up by discussions with your manager to set goals for the year (and don't forget those all important stretch goals!).  The deadline for goals to be documented and agreed upon by manager and employee was March.  So, doing the math, that gave you from March to September to complete your "annual" goals so that you get a nice review.

On top of all this the HR department changed to system every couple years... new categories, different rating scales, on and on...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on July 10, 2019, 12:05:34 AM
No more annual reviews!

OMG Yes!  I used to work a a very well known megacorp and the review cycle went like this...

Annual reviews were performed at the end of the calendar year.  Bonuses were paid the last paycheck in December and raises were effective as of January 1.  My self-evaluation needed to be done in the October-November timeframe.  However, in order to allow the company to have sufficient time for planning/budgeting and all the logistics of managing 40,000+ employee reviews, managers needed to complete their evaluations of their direct reports in September.  Those of you keeping score at home are correct... my manager needed to decide my final rating before I even started thinking about my self-evaluation!  Tell me if that doesn't motivate someone to believe in the process...

In addition, the review cycle was followed up by discussions with your manager to set goals for the year (and don't forget those all important stretch goals!).  The deadline for goals to be documented and agreed upon by manager and employee was March.  So, doing the math, that gave you from March to September to complete your "annual" goals so that you get a nice review.

On top of all this the HR department changed to system every couple years... new categories, different rating scales, on and on...

They propably try to find out with trial and error why the process does not work as good as they thought it would.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Valvore on July 15, 2019, 02:56:24 PM
One reason just came to me...

Pooping in privacy!

I hate how you have to play the silent game or hide out in a stall until someone is done washing their hands so you don't have to face the shame. Not to mention some people in my office have some serious bowel issues and it stinks in there sometimes.

I want to poop in the comfort of my own home. Or at least face the poop shame from strangers and not Karen in Finance.

(Sorry if this has already been mentioned. I haven't read the last few pages of the thread)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: mies on July 15, 2019, 03:37:22 PM
One reason just came to me...

Pooping in privacy!

I hate how you have to play the silent game or hide out in a stall until someone is done washing their hands so you don't have to face the shame. Not to mention some people in my office have some serious bowel issues and it stinks in there sometimes.

I want to poop in the comfort of my own home. Or at least face the poop shame from strangers and not Karen in Finance.

(Sorry if this has already been mentioned. I haven't read the last few pages of the thread)

I say let it fly. Unless you are in a super small office, nobody probably even realizes it's you in there dropping a deuce. If they do, they probably don't care anyways. I mean, that's what bathrooms are for, even women's bathrooms ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Valvore on July 15, 2019, 05:11:40 PM
One reason just came to me...

Pooping in privacy!

I hate how you have to play the silent game or hide out in a stall until someone is done washing their hands so you don't have to face the shame. Not to mention some people in my office have some serious bowel issues and it stinks in there sometimes.

I want to poop in the comfort of my own home. Or at least face the poop shame from strangers and not Karen in Finance.

(Sorry if this has already been mentioned. I haven't read the last few pages of the thread)

I say let it fly. Unless you are in a super small office, nobody probably even realizes it's you in there dropping a deuce. If they do, they probably don't care anyways. I mean, that's what bathrooms are for, even women's bathrooms ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

We have a decently small office and ~50 women on my floor and THREE STALLS. It's impossible to poop in peace. You will 9/10 always pass someone in/out of a stall. And I know they care because I care lol. When one person poos it reeks all day. It's seriously way too small of a bathroom for the amount of people on this floor. I have a regular schedule so I dread the daily embarrassment (mine don't smell as bad, I swear! haha)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on July 15, 2019, 05:21:32 PM
Courtesy flush is the way to go until you can FIRE. Ahem, drop, flush, then clean up and flush again. Wastes water, preserves dignity.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on July 15, 2019, 05:41:22 PM
Does that poop spray work? The kind you spray in the toilet before you poop. Supposed to contain the smell. I have the luxury of a one person at a time bathroom, but it still stinks up the hallway and office sometimes. We do have Febreze in there.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on July 16, 2019, 05:58:16 AM
Does that poop spray work? The kind you spray in the toilet before you poop. Supposed to contain the smell. I have the luxury of a one person at a time bathroom, but it still stinks up the hallway and office sometimes. We do have Febreze in there.

It doesn't so much contain the smell of the poop as it overpowers it. The scent of cherry or whatever becomes incredibly overwhelming.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Davnasty on July 16, 2019, 06:48:13 AM
Does that poop spray work? The kind you spray in the toilet before you poop. Supposed to contain the smell. I have the luxury of a one person at a time bathroom, but it still stinks up the hallway and office sometimes. We do have Febreze in there.

It doesn't so much contain the smell of the poop as it overpowers it. The scent of cherry or whatever becomes incredibly overwhelming.

Maybe it depends on what product we're talking about but I assume it's something with the same active ingredient as one-drop? If so, it does work but it's not perfect. It definitely contains the smell so that it doesn't spread as far or last as long. One-drop isn't advertised as having a scent but it smells something like eucalyptus or mint. It works as the name suggests, one drop is all you need. The bottles are tiny and expensive but they're good for hundreds of drops.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: NorthernMonkey on July 16, 2019, 07:26:47 AM
No more annual reviews!

I have 12 people report into me. I have to do 13 annual reviews. It can easily take absorb over a week by the time you include scheduling, reading before, writing up comments and then baselineing
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: A Fella from Stella on July 16, 2019, 07:51:12 AM
Can't find the post, but someone mentioned all the undershirts. Now I look at them with distain, whereas I used to kind of like them.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on July 16, 2019, 08:00:36 AM
Can't find the post, but someone mentioned all the undershirts. Now I look at them with distain, whereas I used to kind of like them.

I like undershirts. It's so humid in the summer here that there's no getting around the sweat if you go outside. That undershirt does a nice job absorbing it so the sweat doesn't show on the outer shirt.

I do hate having to tuck my outer shirt in though.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: RyanAtTanagra on July 16, 2019, 08:47:12 AM
Can't find the post, but someone mentioned all the undershirts. Now I look at them with distain, whereas I used to kind of like them.

I like undershirts. It's so humid in the summer here that there's no getting around the sweat if you go outside. That undershirt does a nice job absorbing it so the sweat doesn't show on the outer shirt.

I do hate having to tuck my outer shirt in though.

Yea I always wear undershirts, working or not.  It keeps BO off my shirts, which means I can wash them less often, so they last a lot longer.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: bluebelle on July 16, 2019, 09:08:56 AM
No more annual reviews!

OMG Yes!  I used to work a a very well known megacorp and the review cycle went like this...

Annual reviews were performed at the end of the calendar year.  Bonuses were paid the last paycheck in December and raises were effective as of January 1.  My self-evaluation needed to be done in the October-November timeframe.  However, in order to allow the company to have sufficient time for planning/budgeting and all the logistics of managing 40,000+ employee reviews, managers needed to complete their evaluations of their direct reports in September.  Those of you keeping score at home are correct... my manager needed to decide my final rating before I even started thinking about my self-evaluation!  Tell me if that doesn't motivate someone to believe in the process...

In addition, the review cycle was followed up by discussions with your manager to set goals for the year (and don't forget those all important stretch goals!).  The deadline for goals to be documented and agreed upon by manager and employee was March.  So, doing the math, that gave you from March to September to complete your "annual" goals so that you get a nice review.

On top of all this the HR department changed to system every couple years... new categories, different rating scales, on and on...
It's worked this way at every company I've worked at....to the point that I get my raise in the same meeting we discuss my rating.....

Most managers have a fixed amount they can give out in raises and bonuses, therefore ratings need to 'match' the dollar figure they want to give you.   I'm very jaded about this.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on July 16, 2019, 12:41:56 PM
Passwords for everything

I have a password for my Windows/Outlook account, a different password (and username) for time reporting software, and a different password to access a Medicaid & Medicare database. They expire at different intervals, have different requirements, and can't be saved on software or written down due to strict requirements (could access SS numbers and medical records).

I forgot one today and had to call a number to get it reset.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on July 16, 2019, 02:19:04 PM
Courtesy flush is the way to go until you can FIRE. Ahem, drop, flush, then clean up and flush again. Wastes water, preserves dignity.

Have I mentioned I love the Japanese? One reason is because they always have a strange technical solution to a sociological problem. Meet Otohime here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilets_in_Japan#The_Sound_Princess
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on July 16, 2019, 03:34:57 PM
Passwords for everything

I have a password for my Windows/Outlook account, a different password (and username) for time reporting software, and a different password to access a Medicaid & Medicare database. They expire at different intervals, have different requirements, and can't be saved on software or written down due to strict requirements (could access SS numbers and medical records).

I forgot one today and had to call a number to get it reset.

Yes +1!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Password_fatigue

Unfortunately work isn't even half of the problem.  I've got sooo many things that need a login. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: HMman on July 16, 2019, 03:51:33 PM
Courtesy flush is the way to go until you can FIRE. Ahem, drop, flush, then clean up and flush again. Wastes water, preserves dignity.

Have I mentioned I love the Japanese? One reason is because they always have a strange technical solution to a sociological problem. Meet Otohime here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilets_in_Japan#The_Sound_Princess

A white noise machine does nothing for smell, though, which I understood to be the main issue Dicey was referring to. Otohime sound great (ha) for those who are embarrassed by the sounds!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: RyanAtTanagra on July 16, 2019, 04:06:09 PM
Passwords for everything

I have a password for my Windows/Outlook account, a different password (and username) for time reporting software, and a different password to access a Medicaid & Medicare database. They expire at different intervals, have different requirements, and can't be saved on software or written down due to strict requirements (could access SS numbers and medical records).

I forgot one today and had to call a number to get it reset.
Yes +1!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Password_fatigue

Unfortunately work isn't even half of the problem.  I've got sooo many things that need a login.

This is a solved problem with a password manager
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: solon on July 26, 2019, 09:28:03 AM
Yesterday someone cooked fish in the microwave. It made the entire office gross and disgusting.

I can still smell it today.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on July 26, 2019, 10:47:12 AM
I am tired of listening some of my coworkers having their endless chat about something irrelevant bullshaite.

I know WAY more about my co-worker's medical and dental issues, and that of her husband, than I should. Good lord. How on earth does she ever get work done?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: turketron on July 26, 2019, 12:44:19 PM
I work in an open workspace which I know a lot of people hate but for the most part I don't actually have a problem with it- I just put on headphones with some music and I'm good to go. The exception to this is that about a quarter of the people on my floor are fucking children who shoot NERF guns at each other. I've started confiscating any darts that land near me, which I'm keeping in a bag to eventually take to goodwill. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Kronsey on July 26, 2019, 01:51:49 PM
I just really don't like my profession much. I am thankful for it and enjoy serving appreciative clients, but I don't go to bed at night dreaming about debits and credits or changes to the tax code. It is a means to an end.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on July 26, 2019, 01:53:13 PM
I was sitting next to a co-worker in a meeting yesterday who had the ABSOLUTE WORST BREATH IMAGINABLE.  This isn't the first time I got a whiff of this person's breath, and OMIGOD I could not wait to get home and rinse my mouth with mouthwash and brush my teeth!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on July 26, 2019, 02:58:25 PM
I am tired of listening some of my coworkers having their endless chat about something irrelevant bullshaite.

I know WAY more about my co-worker's medical and dental issues, and that of her husband, than I should. Good lord. How on earth does she ever get work done?

OH GOD now she is talking in detail about her dog's diarrhea and raw food diet.... where are my headphones?!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on July 26, 2019, 03:31:05 PM
I work in an open workspace which I know a lot of people hate but for the most part I don't actually have a problem with it- I just put on headphones with some music and I'm good to go. The exception to this is that about a quarter of the people on my floor are fucking children who shoot NERF guns at each other. I've started confiscating any darts that land near me, which I'm keeping in a bag to eventually take to goodwill.

Whaaaat! They actually allow this?

I just really don't like my profession much. I am thankful for it and enjoy serving appreciative clients, but I don't go to bed at night dreaming about debits and credits or changes to the tax code. It is a means to an end.

Sounds like we are in the same line of work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on July 26, 2019, 05:24:08 PM
I work in an open workspace which I know a lot of people hate but for the most part I don't actually have a problem with it- I just put on headphones with some music and I'm good to go. The exception to this is that about a quarter of the people on my floor are fucking children who shoot NERF guns at each other. I've started confiscating any darts that land near me, which I'm keeping in a bag to eventually take to goodwill.
Be sure to hide them where they'll never find them, or smuggle them out steadily so there is no stockpile. Personally, I'd hasten the process by checking around for errant darts before, during, and after work. Asshats.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: RyanAtTanagra on July 27, 2019, 06:12:45 PM
How DARE anyone have fun at work to keep themselves sane!  Jeez y'all are crotchety.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: bluebelle on July 29, 2019, 10:38:30 AM
I have a new petty reason.....I've been flagged for audit for a travel expense from 6 weeks ago..they want a detailed receipt for a meal that was under the limit where a receipt is required, so of course I don't have one.....but it was a spendy day, so I'm over the undocumented daily limit....don't tell me to review the expense policy when what you're flagging me for isn't in the flippin' expense policy.   I'm hoping this was just some stupid automated email, that once I say I don't have the receipt for the $14 meal, the 'problem' will go away......
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: albireo13 on July 30, 2019, 08:17:59 PM
The SITTING. The constant SITTING. I hate it! I make sure I get up and walk around once an hour at least, even if it's just to go to the ladies' (I drink lots of coffee and water just to have the excuse, honestly), and on days that I can take a lunch break and it's not miserable out I make sure to get in a lunchtime walk, but I'm getting increasingly creaky and stiff.

I've considered requesting a standing desk but I don't think my company would pay for it, and honestly, the problem is being stationary, not just sitting. The ability to move around whenever I want is worth so much to me.

Having a standing desk makes it much easier to move/wiggle around, even though you aren't walking. I do lots of stretches and other weird stuff.

Source: Am standing desk wiggler.

I have a standing desk and it is great for my back issues.
However, I notice that I get interrupted much more frequently now.   By standing, my head pokes above the munchkin office walls and people can see me.
This leads to more of them wandering into my office to talk about issues which, if they had half a brain, they could deal with themselves.

I find I need to keep a low profile in order to be able to actually accomplish my work assignments.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: The_Big_H on July 30, 2019, 11:34:13 PM
Every month we have a "optional" (lol) birthday celebration in the lobby, everyone's birthday that month is on the wall.  Everyone sings the happy birthday song in a tune of about 3.6 roentgen (not great not terrible)

The terrible part is when we get to "Happy Birthday dear _name_" people start randomly vomiting all the names out and it devolves into nearly everyone laughing like its so cute we cant fit 3-10 peoples name in the song properly.

Its been almost a decade, its not funny the 100th time. Just sing it "dear everyone" for Christ's sake.  I will enjoy not being forced into "optional" birthday celebrations.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: markbike528CBX on July 30, 2019, 11:53:44 PM
Snip...  Everyone sings the happy birthday song in a tune of about 3.6 roentgen (not great not terrible).. Snip....

OMG. I've never heard of / never nightmared a tune in a key of roentgen (a measure of radioactivity dose).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on July 31, 2019, 10:24:52 AM
Yeah, could be a fairly dangerous song...


The SITTING. The constant SITTING. I hate it! I make sure I get up and walk around once an hour at least, even if it's just to go to the ladies' (I drink lots of coffee and water just to have the excuse, honestly), and on days that I can take a lunch break and it's not miserable out I make sure to get in a lunchtime walk, but I'm getting increasingly creaky and stiff.

I've considered requesting a standing desk but I don't think my company would pay for it, and honestly, the problem is being stationary, not just sitting. The ability to move around whenever I want is worth so much to me.

Having a standing desk makes it much easier to move/wiggle around, even though you aren't walking. I do lots of stretches and other weird stuff.

Source: Am standing desk wiggler.

I have a standing desk and it is great for my back issues.
However, I notice that I get interrupted much more frequently now.   By standing, my head pokes above the munchkin office walls and people can see me.
This leads to more of them wandering into my office to talk about issues which, if they had half a brain, they could deal with themselves.

I find I need to keep a low profile in order to be able to actually accomplish my work assignments.

I got a motored up/down desk (whats the word in english?) at home after I moved this month. The most expensive item I bought!

It already served me good in the week I have it, albeit not for standing, because I have injured my foot. But it was awesome how easy I could plug in/out cables from the computers by just moving the table upwards and then bend from my chair!
With a normal desk you need to crawl, with this one I can keep sitting :D
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on August 02, 2019, 01:44:08 PM
As part of my job I triage and assign service requests for technical equipment. (If I can’t fix it, I’ll find you someone who can.)  I enjoy absurdities, but enough is enough.  All situations described below happened TODAY BEFORE LUNCH.

The first call this morning was from someone who didn’t want to give their name, but had a few questions about whether a “craft project” they “just invented” would be detectable using certain equipment (it would).  As vague as their description of the craft project was, I could immediately imagine three unique and illegal uses for this item (probably more), so I asked a few questions. An entertaining ten minutes later the caller wanted to know if they can drive to my facility to test their prototype.  No, but thanks for playing.

A customer requested 20 identical replacement parts.  I checked their history, they have one machine and they ordered 10 of the same item earlier in 2019.  This is technically a consumable part, but even with heavy use you should get several YEARS service out of each replacement. I spelled out the math for them, but they’d rather pay multiple “small” bills for parts, than one “big” service bill that will cost less and should last longer than the 30 parts combined. Thank you very much.

A different customer called saying “I don’t want a service ticket” which usually means they want service, they just don’t want to pay for it.  Many questions on my part later, I’m pretty sure their equipment is infected with ransomware (they insisted is not, probably because its highly unprofessional to allow this type of equipment to be connected/operated in a way that would make it susceptible to attack), their IT provider was refusing to help them, their “cyber insurance” company was refusing to pay out, and could we just get them back up and running?  I checked their payment history and offered to send a quote for services.  Thanks, but no thanks.

A salesperson (one of ours) demanded immediate onsite service for a low priority issue.  I explained politely and professionally why the customer would have to wait until early next week for service (finite resources already assigned, order of operations, basic laws of physics, etc.).  Eleven increasingly angry emails from this salesperson later (really, I counted), each looping in additional staff members until the whole office was watching the salesperson melt down, we publicly established: 1) The salesperson didn’t want to admit to the customer that they promised themselves into a corner. 2) The salesperson wanted me to cold call the customer to cover for him right up until the moment it dawned on him it would make him look bad (I had to spell that revelation out for him).  3) One of the multiple staff members watching from the sidelines established that the salesperson had provided a bad number for the contact.  When asked for a second number, the salesperson provided a phone number that was also bad.  When asked for a third number, the salesperson went silent.  I’ll have someone drive by early next week to see if the salesperson provided a correct address (customer has multiple easily confused facilities).  If the customer really needed service that badly, I'm confident they would have called direct by now.

Stupid people keep me employed.  I’ve had enough of stupid people for today.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Davnasty on August 02, 2019, 02:04:35 PM
You should have been SheWhoWalksOutAtLunch today
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: 2sk22 on August 04, 2019, 02:12:58 AM
@SheWhoWalksAtLunch you really earned your salary today! I really feel for you- it's hard enough to handle unreasonable customers but it's a lot harder to deal with people nominally on your own team like that salesman :-(
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on August 04, 2019, 12:18:05 PM
Yeah, could be a fairly dangerous song...


The SITTING. The constant SITTING. I hate it! I make sure I get up and walk around once an hour at least, even if it's just to go to the ladies' (I drink lots of coffee and water just to have the excuse, honestly), and on days that I can take a lunch break and it's not miserable out I make sure to get in a lunchtime walk, but I'm getting increasingly creaky and stiff.

I've considered requesting a standing desk but I don't think my company would pay for it, and honestly, the problem is being stationary, not just sitting. The ability to move around whenever I want is worth so much to me.

Having a standing desk makes it much easier to move/wiggle around, even though you aren't walking. I do lots of stretches and other weird stuff.

Source: Am standing desk wiggler.

I have a standing desk and it is great for my back issues.
However, I notice that I get interrupted much more frequently now.   By standing, my head pokes above the munchkin office walls and people can see me.
This leads to more of them wandering into my office to talk about issues which, if they had half a brain, they could deal with themselves.

I find I need to keep a low profile in order to be able to actually accomplish my work assignments.

I got a motored up/down desk (whats the word in english?) at home after I moved this month. The most expensive item I bought!

It already served me good in the week I have it, albeit not for standing, because I have injured my foot. But it was awesome how easy I could plug in/out cables from the computers by just moving the table upwards and then bend from my chair!
With a normal desk you need to crawl, with this one I can keep sitting :D

You just reminded me of the very least favourite part of my job and it happens every day. In my company we use 4-person corner desks. Our desktops are right in the middle, on the floor.

Every single working day I start off by getting on my knees and crawling on the floor to turn on my computer. My desk is facing the hallway and I am the only woman in the office. So every single morning I start off by sitting on my hands and knees with my butt just about sticking out from under the desk in full view of everyone who walks by. The men at my workplace aren't the type to make lewd comments thankfully but it still feels very awkward. I always make sure my skirts are long enough that I can put my knees on the seam.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ErrantVenture on August 04, 2019, 12:33:18 PM
I can't stand the annual corporate performance review or buying new socks for work.

I hate that I have to pay money, for fancy looking shoes and clothing, to go to work, to make more money.

I also hate wearing shoes. And socks. And clothes, generally.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: IslandFiGirl on August 04, 2019, 03:10:43 PM
I have to buy a parking permit to park at my job for SIX HUNDRED dollars each year.  And every year I say I'm not doing it, I'll just park farther away where I don't need a permit and ride my bike in, but then I change my mind because I remember I have meetings all over the city that I have to get to (in a timely manner) and I don't have time to bike to my car and then get to the meeting.  EVERY year I get so pissed about PAYING to park at work!  Yeah, that's my "petty" reason. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on August 04, 2019, 07:00:17 PM
I can't stand the annual corporate performance review or buying new socks for work.

I hate that I have to pay money, for fancy looking shoes and clothing, to go to work, to make more money.

I also hate wearing shoes. And socks. And clothes, generally.

I agree with this.  I go barefoot as much as I can, and when retired, I will be barefoot almost always.  Unless it gets too cold.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on August 05, 2019, 09:12:21 AM
I can't stand the annual corporate performance review or buying new socks for work.

I hate that I have to pay money, for fancy looking shoes and clothing, to go to work, to make more money.

I also hate wearing shoes. And socks. And clothes, generally.

I agree with this.  I go barefoot as much as I can, and when retired, I will be barefoot almost always.  Unless it gets too cold.

I agree with all of this. Also, how much time, money, and effort I spend on grooming items so that I look presentable/do not offend people at work. I had this thought this morning while I was putting my deodorant on, of all things! I thought, if I were FIREd right now I'd have my hair in a messy ponytail, I may or may not have showered, I certainly would not be concerned if my odor is offensive to others, and I'd be barefoot in my garden!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on August 05, 2019, 09:17:36 AM
I can't stand the annual corporate performance review or buying new socks for work.

I hate that I have to pay money, for fancy looking shoes and clothing, to go to work, to make more money.

I also hate wearing shoes. And socks. And clothes, generally.

I agree with this.  I go barefoot as much as I can, and when retired, I will be barefoot almost always.  Unless it gets too cold.

I agree with all of this. Also, how much time, money, and effort I spend on grooming items so that I look presentable/do not offend people at work. I had this thought this morning while I was putting my deodorant on, of all things! I thought, if I were FIREd right now I'd have my hair in a messy ponytail, I may or may not have showered, I certainly would not be concerned if my odor is offensive to others, and I'd be barefoot in my garden!

I prefer to wear hiking clothes and a buff on my hair whenever I have a day free. My boss once said that I could wear a buff if I feel the need for it. That is nice, but I don't consider that very appropriate.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on August 05, 2019, 09:24:18 AM
I have so many things to do in September that I don't really have the time to work. And I don't want to go to the yearly 2 day meeting in a hotel. That night I have a free mushroom course that I would prefer to go to.
I'm not sure what happens if I don't go, do I need to work these days?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on August 05, 2019, 10:46:53 AM
I have so many things to do in September that I don't really have the time to work.

That is how my August is. I am SO swamped right now - and what kills me is that I don't have anything at all to do at work. Yet, other people are on vacation so I can't take time off as we need "coverage."
This is stupid - I need to cook and do some home canning and take care of the garden and I have a big event coming up for my side hustle in 2 weeks that I need to prepare for, and instead I'm in a cubicle farting around on the Internet and trying to look busy because I am literally just waiting for work to come in.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on August 05, 2019, 10:55:00 AM
I was putting my deodorant on, of all things! I thought, if I were FIREd right now I'd have my hair in a messy ponytail,

There are deodorants (and even more perfums) that stink worse than most people.

Also I think I like messy Ponytails.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: merula on August 05, 2019, 11:31:01 AM
I read the entire thread in one sitting (slow day at work) and could not agree with this more:

unfortunately specific to my occupation, but so i never have to hear another IT leader say “shift left” ever again in my life.

The thing is, I don't even work in IT. Not even close. But in my company, being able to use IT terms in non-IT settings is a prerequisite for management, so here we are. I need to shift this work left, that work right, even though none of it is actually shiftable unless you have a time machine. I need to create an MVP rather than something that's actually going to work. I need to document my assets and work on BLUE cards but not PURPLE cards.

This is at an insurance company. They're making some actuaries go Agile. It's utter madness.

My petty reason for seeking FIRE? I believe that insurance is insurance; it's boring, and it's supposed to be boring. Boring is good for insurance! But, no, management wants to make stuff exciting, so they make comparisons to Google and Amazon and freaking DOMINOS in the pursuit of "innovation". You wanna know what kind of "innovation" would be "transformative" in the insurance industry? Predicting exactly how and when climate change is going to destroy everything. Go shift THAT left.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on August 05, 2019, 12:13:12 PM
I was putting my deodorant on, of all things! I thought, if I were FIREd right now I'd have my hair in a messy ponytail,

There are deodorants (and even more perfums) that stink worse than most people.

Also I think I like messy Ponytails.

This is true, so why is BO less socially acceptable than whatever the guy walking to the train in front of me bathed in this morning? Yuck!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Candace on August 05, 2019, 12:28:03 PM
I read the entire thread in one sitting (slow day at work) and could not agree with this more:

unfortunately specific to my occupation, but so i never have to hear another IT leader say “shift left” ever again in my life.

The thing is, I don't even work in IT. Not even close. But in my company, being able to use IT terms in non-IT settings is a prerequisite for management, so here we are. I need to shift this work left, that work right, even though none of it is actually shiftable unless you have a time machine. I need to create an MVP rather than something that's actually going to work. I need to document my assets and work on BLUE cards but not PURPLE cards.

This is at an insurance company. They're making some actuaries go Agile. It's utter madness.

My petty reason for seeking FIRE? I believe that insurance is insurance; it's boring, and it's supposed to be boring. Boring is good for insurance! But, no, management wants to make stuff exciting, so they make comparisons to Google and Amazon and freaking DOMINOS in the pursuit of "innovation". You wanna know what kind of "innovation" would be "transformative" in the insurance industry? Predicting exactly how and when climate change is going to destroy everything. Go shift THAT left.

This is priceless.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on August 05, 2019, 12:45:36 PM
I keep reasonable hygiene habits, not because I have go to to the office every day, but because I don't want to be dirty and smelly.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on August 05, 2019, 06:41:48 PM
When I was on vacation a girl walked by me in the park that obviously didn't believe in bathing or deodorant.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: 2sk22 on August 06, 2019, 02:28:37 AM
This is at an insurance company. They're making some actuaries go Agile. It's utter madness.

My petty reason for seeking FIRE? I believe that insurance is insurance; it's boring, and it's supposed to be boring. Boring is good for insurance! But, no, management wants to make stuff exciting, so they make comparisons to Google and Amazon and freaking DOMINOS in the pursuit of "innovation". You wanna know what kind of "innovation" would be "transformative" in the insurance industry? Predicting exactly how and when climate change is going to destroy everything. Go shift THAT left.

This is ridiculous but, unfortunately, IT envy is spreading. A friend who works in pharmaceuticals says that they are adopting agile too. Mind you drug development happens on the timescale of years!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: albireo13 on August 06, 2019, 06:01:25 AM
Agile ... what a crock of sh$t.
We have that and it is a hoot to watch the lemmings all run around doing their scrum meetings, etc.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chickadee on August 06, 2019, 06:07:58 AM
My most petty reason:

I want to nap with the dog in the afternoons ....and drink hot tea slowly in the morning after I putter around the garden. Lol. I am 30s going on 80s in my own head.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on August 06, 2019, 06:41:23 AM
Agile is the worst.  A complete destroyer of productivity.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SweetRedWine on August 06, 2019, 07:06:34 AM
Agile is the worst.  A complete destroyer of productivity.

This is absolutely true.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dcheesi on August 06, 2019, 09:21:55 AM
Agile ... what a crock of sh$t.
We have that and it is a hoot to watch the lemmings all run around doing their scrum meetings, etc.
When I was first involved with Agile development, it actually served a need1 and was an improvement. It was also appropriate for the project/product. Now, you get bastardized pseudo-Agile that checks off management's boxes but otherwise just wastes everyone's time.

1Specifically, keeping Marketing in line. We had a particularly flighty/anyway-the-wind-blows Marketing guy in charge of our product, and the Agile estimation process was a way to compensate for his frequent changes in direction, while also forcing him to acknowledge and deal with the inevitable tradeoffs (tasks that would drop out of the project schedule if we worked on his latest "must-have" idea instead).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: never give up on August 06, 2019, 10:58:30 AM
I hate Agile. Micromanagement dressed up as something fancy. However Agile is not a petty reason to FIRE. It’s up there in my top twenty very good reasons to FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on August 06, 2019, 02:01:29 PM
Agile ... what a crock of sh$t.
We have that and it is a hoot to watch the lemmings all run around doing their scrum meetings, etc.

If you have many meetings, you are not doing agile (right).
But I guess from the other comments that you all just know the bastardized controller-.guy based version that is named the same way.

The original agile's meaning was that you start with a small, working program uand build on that. I work in a company that does this. The product literally is never finished, but always improved.
There is software where this is the best approach. Then there is software where this is bullshit.

And then there is the variant made by management. The description in one search results goes like this: ...is a value-driven approach that enables Project Managers to deliver high-priority, high quality work.

 "high-priority, high quality work" is exactly where agile is not fit for.
Not to mention that you should never touch a company that has "value-driven type of work" in their description, or where the Project Manager is more important than the customer or worker.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FI45RE on August 07, 2019, 07:02:45 AM
Not having to listen to people question why I'm skipping pizza/doughnuts in favor of healthy food choices.

That s**t got old a long time ago.

Yes. This. No shit, my boss will walk to my office to ask why I didn't want to eat the crappy food provided at our quarterly department meetings.

"You're missing out"

"Oh, ok."
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: yow on August 07, 2019, 07:13:44 AM
Not having to listen to people question why I'm skipping pizza/doughnuts in favor of healthy food choices.

That s**t got old a long time ago.

Yes. This. No shit, my boss will walk to my office to ask why I didn't want to eat the crappy food provided at our quarterly department meetings.

"You're missing out"

"Oh, ok."

This one definitely strikes a chord with me.

I'll have to go through this tomorrow. It never fails to be asked.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Candace on August 07, 2019, 07:32:07 AM
Not having to listen to people question why I'm skipping pizza/doughnuts in favor of healthy food choices.

That s**t got old a long time ago.

Yes. This. No shit, my boss will walk to my office to ask why I didn't want to eat the crappy food provided at our quarterly department meetings.

"You're missing out"

"Oh, ok."

This one definitely strikes a chord with me.

I'll have to go through this tomorrow. It never fails to be asked.
+1
I'm FIREd and this is one of the things I seriously enjoy not having to deal with. I'm a chocolate 'addict' and it's so nice not to be confronted with brownies, cookies, and candy so often.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: merula on August 07, 2019, 07:47:54 AM
"high-priority, high quality work" is exactly where agile is not fit for.

THIS. EXACTLY THIS.

You want to use agile on your latest app that aggregates all of the Housewives gossip? Great. Latest Google Maps competitor? Awesome.

Using Agile on software that rates and issues insurance policies, which are required by law to comply with very strict requirements that are changing constantly because insurance is regulated at the state level? For a Fortune 500 company where no downtime is acceptable?

Madness.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: couponvan on August 07, 2019, 07:55:42 AM
Day drinking
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on August 07, 2019, 08:14:09 AM
Not having to listen to people question why I'm skipping pizza/doughnuts in favor of healthy food choices.

That s**t got old a long time ago.

Yes. This. No shit, my boss will walk to my office to ask why I didn't want to eat the crappy food provided at our quarterly department meetings.

"You're missing out"

"Oh, ok."

This one definitely strikes a chord with me.

I'll have to go through this tomorrow. It never fails to be asked.

At my current office there's never vegetarian options when management provides a meal.  NEVER, and I've worked here almost three years.  How hard is it to order one cheese pizza? (last order 18 pizzas - all different - all containing meat).  And who puts sausage in mashed potatoes, bacon in green beans & pepperoni in green salad??(most recent holiday celebration)   I pack a lunch every day and pack extra on "free food" days.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Philociraptor on August 07, 2019, 08:48:46 AM
Day drinking

Recently discovered Tiki Bars and would like to have time to replicate these recipes at home.

Plus a beer with lunch would be nice.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Fish Sweet on August 07, 2019, 10:15:42 AM
Being able to smile quizzically at my knucklehead of a coworker when he complains about how poor "we" are.   (He assumes that we're both making similar incomes.  We are not, and I think that with his poor work ethic he's soon heading toward having no income at all.)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dcheesi on August 07, 2019, 10:28:08 AM
Not having to listen to people question why I'm skipping pizza/doughnuts in favor of healthy food choices.

That s**t got old a long time ago.

Yes. This. No shit, my boss will walk to my office to ask why I didn't want to eat the crappy food provided at our quarterly department meetings.

"You're missing out"

"Oh, ok."

This one definitely strikes a chord with me.

I'll have to go through this tomorrow. It never fails to be asked.

At my current office there's never vegetarian options when management provides a meal.  NEVER, and I've worked here almost three years.  How hard is it to order one cheese pizza? (last order 18 pizzas - all different - all containing meat).  And who puts sausage in mashed potatoes, bacon in green beans & pepperoni in green salad??(most recent holiday celebration)   I pack a lunch every day and pack extra on "free food" days.
Bacon in green beans (or cooked greens in general) is a Southern tradition. Not sure about those others, though.

The problem I run into at work is that they do order vegetarian options, but only just barely enough for the strict vegetarians in the group. Apparently it's better to leave the vegetarians wanting more than to risk any omnivores having to eat a (*gasp*) slice of cheese pizza!

Personally, I'm not full-time veg., but I do like to eat healthy most of the time. However, we're frequently admonished to leave the veg. options for the vegetarians, and the remaining options are usually full of sausage and other high-fat meats. I suppose I could ask to be added to the veg. list for work gatherings, but I suspect that would raise its own issues; not to mention that the veg. options presented are rather poor in some cases (e.g., just a big bowl of greek salad, when they order from the kabob shop --even though said shop has plenty of veg. entree offerings!).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zikoris on August 07, 2019, 11:38:02 AM
Not having to listen to people question why I'm skipping pizza/doughnuts in favor of healthy food choices.

That s**t got old a long time ago.

Yes. This. No shit, my boss will walk to my office to ask why I didn't want to eat the crappy food provided at our quarterly department meetings.

"You're missing out"

"Oh, ok."

This one definitely strikes a chord with me.

I'll have to go through this tomorrow. It never fails to be asked.

At my current office there's never vegetarian options when management provides a meal.  NEVER, and I've worked here almost three years.  How hard is it to order one cheese pizza? (last order 18 pizzas - all different - all containing meat).  And who puts sausage in mashed potatoes, bacon in green beans & pepperoni in green salad??(most recent holiday celebration)   I pack a lunch every day and pack extra on "free food" days.
Bacon in green beans (or cooked greens in general) is a Southern tradition. Not sure about those others, though.

The problem I run into at work is that they do order vegetarian options, but only just barely enough for the strict vegetarians in the group. Apparently it's better to leave the vegetarians wanting more than to risk any omnivores having to eat a (*gasp*) slice of cheese pizza!

Personally, I'm not full-time veg., but I do like to eat healthy most of the time. However, we're frequently admonished to leave the veg. options for the vegetarians, and the remaining options are usually full of sausage and other high-fat meats. I suppose I could ask to be added to the veg. list for work gatherings, but I suspect that would raise its own issues; not to mention that the veg. options presented are rather poor in some cases (e.g., just a big bowl of greek salad, when they order from the kabob shop --even though said shop has plenty of veg. entree offerings!).

At my company everyone fights over the vegan stuff. Like, it's gotten so bad they literally have someone guard the vegan options to make sure only the confirmed vegans get it, or it gets decimated immediately. Like, JFC, just order more of it already, clearly if you need a guard for it then your meat/vegan ordering ratio is totally off.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AlanStache on August 07, 2019, 02:46:57 PM
I think some people just have a mental block about veg stuff.  They may be open to discussion about it in the moment but any progress made in there understanding will just fade away before the next company catered lunch.   Like I have had people think I need to eat fish at meals when the learn I am pescatarian, no I am actually ok not.  Maybe they think that because they need meat at each meal I need fish at each meal?  But turning down a doughnut.... that is just wrong :-) 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GreenSheep on August 07, 2019, 03:17:43 PM
I think some people just have a mental block about veg stuff.  They may be open to discussion about it in the moment but any progress made in there understanding will just fade away before the next company catered lunch.   Like I have had people think I need to eat fish at meals when the learn I am pescatarian, no I am actually ok not.  Maybe they think that because they need meat at each meal I need fish at each meal?  But turning down a doughnut.... that is just wrong :-)

Ha, this reminds me (a whole food plants-only eater) of the time I went to a week-long group thing where meals were prepared for us daily. They served me tofu at every single meal, including breakfast, for several days until I finally politely told them that I'm perfectly happy with fruits, vegetables, grains, legumes, nuts, and seeds -- all of which were already being served, so it was actually less work for them to just leave out the tofu. At home, I might eat tofu once a month, if that. I appreciate their effort to accommodate a diet they don't really understand, but I don't require tofu for survival!

Also, seconding the experience of having all the vegan food go first. People turn up their noses at the idea of vegan food, but apparently there's something appealing about it when you just set it out there without a label. Maybe because plants tend to be colorful and pretty.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on August 07, 2019, 05:19:51 PM
I'm allergic to milk (and everything derived from milk) and work goes out of their way to make sure catered lunches have something that I'm not allergic to.  It's actually very nice!  Now, that means I usually end up having bbq wings, but I can live with that 3 times a year.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Gin1984 on August 07, 2019, 05:34:21 PM
This is at an insurance company. They're making some actuaries go Agile. It's utter madness.

My petty reason for seeking FIRE? I believe that insurance is insurance; it's boring, and it's supposed to be boring. Boring is good for insurance! But, no, management wants to make stuff exciting, so they make comparisons to Google and Amazon and freaking DOMINOS in the pursuit of "innovation". You wanna know what kind of "innovation" would be "transformative" in the insurance industry? Predicting exactly how and when climate change is going to destroy everything. Go shift THAT left.

This is ridiculous but, unfortunately, IT envy is spreading. A friend who works in pharmaceuticals says that they are adopting agile too. Mind you drug development happens on the timescale of years!
Can someone explain agile to me? Google is not helping me here.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Chickadee on August 07, 2019, 07:00:38 PM
I have a new petty reason.....I've been flagged for audit for a travel expense from 6 weeks ago..they want a detailed receipt for a meal that was under the limit where a receipt is required, so of course I don't have one.....but it was a spendy day, so I'm over the undocumented daily limit....don't tell me to review the expense policy when what you're flagging me for isn't in the flippin' expense policy.   I'm hoping this was just some stupid automated email, that once I say I don't have the receipt for the $14 meal, the 'problem' will go away......

I (this is really sad) will make the hotel manager sign a form this year when I travel which I have made that says a double occupancy is same price as single occupancy when I take my husband along because I was denied last year for one king bed two people versus one king bed and one person. Lost out on 1/2 entire annual meeting room stay under premise I could have been splitting with someone who paid.
Not. This. Year. Crazy lady with form coming thru!!!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: 2sk22 on August 08, 2019, 02:27:46 AM
Can someone explain agile to me? Google is not helping me here.

The Agile movement started about 20 odd years ago in software development. One of the common problems with developing user-facing software is that requirements are not known or are often fully understood. The aim of Agile methodologies was to better deal with these kinds of situations. One technique is to divide development into short bursts in order to get quick feedback from customers.

The theory is that an Agile development methodology is better than the old "waterfall" model in which requirements were first gathered and then software developed and tested (in sequence). It was observed that the waterfall methodology would often result in the development of software that does not serve any purpose.

Agile was supposed to address this problem. In practice, what's happened is that "Agile" become a cargo-cult series of rituals.

For example, one reason I quit a mega-corp last month was that I was forced to participate in a daily scrum (i.e. short meeting) at 9:30am every day. This was supposed to be a quick information exchange but in practice often become a kind of group shaming exercise. I work in AI research and my thought processes are bursty - a couple of weeks can go by when I haven't made any obvious progress and then all of a sudden, I get an idea which clicks. I was beginning to dread having to give a daily progress report.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: mies on August 08, 2019, 04:13:13 AM
Can someone explain agile to me? Google is not helping me here.

The Agile movement started about 20 odd years ago in software development. One of the common problems with developing user-facing software is that requirements are not known or are often fully understood. The aim of Agile methodologies was to better deal with these kinds of situations. One technique is to divide development into short bursts in order to get quick feedback from customers.

The theory is that an Agile development methodology is better than the old "waterfall" model in which requirements were first gathered and then software developed and tested (in sequence). It was observed that the waterfall methodology would often result in the development of software that does not serve any purpose.

Agile was supposed to address this problem. In practice, what's happened is that "Agile" become a cargo-cult series of rituals.

For example, one reason I quit a mega-corp last month was that I was forced to participate in a daily scrum (i.e. short meeting) at 9:30am every day. This was supposed to be a quick information exchange but in practice often become a kind of group shaming exercise. I work in AI research and my thought processes are bursty - a couple of weeks can go by when I haven't made any obvious progress and then all of a sudden, I get an idea which clicks. I was beginning to dread having to give a daily progress report.

Agile is bullshit, especially if you need to do deeper thought or have a project that takes longer than your sprint. I don’t mind the daily stand ups, but sometimes you have to get creative with your updates to make it sound like you did something. Some days you can knock out a ton of stories, some days you bang your head against the wall trying every iteration you can think of to get something working.

My beef with agile is all the terminology is meaningless unless you’ve taken an agile class. Scrum master? Release train engineer? Agile coach?  They are completely inscrutable terms unless you have a glossary. Even if you have a glossary, what the people in those positions do still seems kind of unclear.

Plus, they are another layer of people that aren’t directly contributing to software development. They’re not coding, testing, or doing technical support for your customers. It just seems like they are there to make you feel bad because you didn’t do what you planned to do for the sprint because you hit a technical roadblock. Or they give you shit because you messed up some report in Jira because you moved a card to the wrong status.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on August 08, 2019, 10:00:32 AM
I think some people just have a mental block about veg stuff.  They may be open to discussion about it in the moment but any progress made in there understanding will just fade away before the next company catered lunch.   Like I have had people think I need to eat fish at meals when the learn I am pescatarian, no I am actually ok not.  Maybe they think that because they need meat at each meal I need fish at each meal?  But turning down a doughnut.... that is just wrong :-)

Also, seconding the experience of having all the vegan food go first. People turn up their noses at the idea of vegan food, but apparently there's something appealing about it when you just set it out there without a label. Maybe because plants tend to be colorful and pretty.

Back when I traveled for work, the staff making travel arrangements knew to always request a vegetarian meal for me on airplanes (I sooo don't miss traveling for work).  I regularly had to defend my comparatively attractive / fresh airplane food from obnoxious seatmates (mostly other business men I did not know) who demanded they be given what "she's having"
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zikoris on August 08, 2019, 11:21:54 AM
I think some people just have a mental block about veg stuff.  They may be open to discussion about it in the moment but any progress made in there understanding will just fade away before the next company catered lunch.   Like I have had people think I need to eat fish at meals when the learn I am pescatarian, no I am actually ok not.  Maybe they think that because they need meat at each meal I need fish at each meal?  But turning down a doughnut.... that is just wrong :-)

Also, seconding the experience of having all the vegan food go first. People turn up their noses at the idea of vegan food, but apparently there's something appealing about it when you just set it out there without a label. Maybe because plants tend to be colorful and pretty.

Back when I traveled for work, the staff making travel arrangements knew to always request a vegetarian meal for me on airplanes (I sooo don't miss traveling for work).  I regularly had to defend my comparatively attractive / fresh airplane food from obnoxious seatmates (mostly other business men I did not know) who demanded they be given what "she's having"

Lol, I may be biased as a nearly lifelong vegan, but damn, my airplane food always looks so much better than the ones around me. There's practically always nice fresh fruit and salads.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on August 08, 2019, 02:21:48 PM
I think some people just have a mental block about veg stuff.  They may be open to discussion about it in the moment but any progress made in there understanding will just fade away before the next company catered lunch.   Like I have had people think I need to eat fish at meals when the learn I am pescatarian, no I am actually ok not.  Maybe they think that because they need meat at each meal I need fish at each meal?  But turning down a doughnut.... that is just wrong :-)

Also, seconding the experience of having all the vegan food go first. People turn up their noses at the idea of vegan food, but apparently there's something appealing about it when you just set it out there without a label. Maybe because plants tend to be colorful and pretty.

Back when I traveled for work, the staff making travel arrangements knew to always request a vegetarian meal for me on airplanes (I sooo don't miss traveling for work).  I regularly had to defend my comparatively attractive / fresh airplane food from obnoxious seatmates (mostly other business men I did not know) who demanded they be given what "she's having"

Lol, I may be biased as a nearly lifelong vegan, but damn, my airplane food always looks so much better than the ones around me. There's practically always nice fresh fruit and salads.

After I'd been there a few years the staff making travel arrangements complained that everyone who flew with me at some point were now also requesting vegetarian meals for exactly that reason.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AlanStache on August 08, 2019, 03:16:58 PM
I think some people just have a mental block about veg stuff.  They may be open to discussion about it in the moment but any progress made in there understanding will just fade away before the next company catered lunch.   Like I have had people think I need to eat fish at meals when the learn I am pescatarian, no I am actually ok not.  Maybe they think that because they need meat at each meal I need fish at each meal?  But turning down a doughnut.... that is just wrong :-)

Also, seconding the experience of having all the vegan food go first. People turn up their noses at the idea of vegan food, but apparently there's something appealing about it when you just set it out there without a label. Maybe because plants tend to be colorful and pretty.

Back when I traveled for work, the staff making travel arrangements knew to always request a vegetarian meal for me on airplanes (I sooo don't miss traveling for work).  I regularly had to defend my comparatively attractive / fresh airplane food from obnoxious seatmates (mostly other business men I did not know) who demanded they be given what "she's having"

Lol, I may be biased as a nearly lifelong vegan, but damn, my airplane food always looks so much better than the ones around me. There's practically always nice fresh fruit and salads.

After I'd been there a few years the staff making travel arrangements complained that everyone who flew with me at some point were now also requesting vegetarian meals for exactly that reason.

In Civilization that would be a culture victory.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on August 08, 2019, 03:59:06 PM
Yeah the veggie options at lunch. We don't often have catered sandwich lunches but when there are visitors we always ask the caterer to throw in 2 veggie sandwiches just in case. That means that all other food usually contains meat. We're not vegetarian or vegan but we eat very little meat. I don't want take anyone's vegetarian food but I also really don't want to eat some disgusting salty sausage either. And why do caterers think a cheese sandwich is the only existing vegetarian sandwich?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: couponvan on August 08, 2019, 04:04:56 PM
I can supervise construction going on next door and be Mrs. Kravitz of the neighborhood....I have turned into my grandma.

Coke lied though with that Diet Coke Break commercial of the 90’s....the worker guys are not at all like the worker guys on TV.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on August 08, 2019, 05:12:24 PM
I can supervise construction going on next door and be Mrs. Kravitz of the neighborhood....I have turned into my grandma.

Coke lied though with that Diet Coke Break commercial of the 90’s....the worker guys are not at all like the worker guys on TV.
If that's true, your grandma must have been a hottie!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on August 09, 2019, 05:00:33 AM
I'm allergic to milk (and everything derived from milk) and work goes out of their way to make sure catered lunches have something that I'm not allergic to.  It's actually very nice!  Now, that means I usually end up having bbq wings, but I can live with that 3 times a year.
I spoke too soon!  Yesterday was rough, we got free pizza, then cupcakes, twice.  I couldn't eat any of it :-(
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Hirondelle on August 09, 2019, 05:05:06 AM
I think some people just have a mental block about veg stuff.  They may be open to discussion about it in the moment but any progress made in there understanding will just fade away before the next company catered lunch.   Like I have had people think I need to eat fish at meals when the learn I am pescatarian, no I am actually ok not.  Maybe they think that because they need meat at each meal I need fish at each meal?  But turning down a doughnut.... that is just wrong :-)

Also, seconding the experience of having all the vegan food go first. People turn up their noses at the idea of vegan food, but apparently there's something appealing about it when you just set it out there without a label. Maybe because plants tend to be colorful and pretty.

Back when I traveled for work, the staff making travel arrangements knew to always request a vegetarian meal for me on airplanes (I sooo don't miss traveling for work).  I regularly had to defend my comparatively attractive / fresh airplane food from obnoxious seatmates (mostly other business men I did not know) who demanded they be given what "she's having"

Lol, I may be biased as a nearly lifelong vegan, but damn, my airplane food always looks so much better than the ones around me. There's practically always nice fresh fruit and salads.

After I'd been there a few years the staff making travel arrangements complained that everyone who flew with me at some point were now also requesting vegetarian meals for exactly that reason.

I actually do this. Whenever I go to some catered event or travel arrangement and can let them know about restrictions, I request vegetarian food (not a real veg, but I don't cook/buy meat for myself). I consider myself some sorta 'fake vegetarian'.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tris Prior on August 09, 2019, 08:57:31 AM


Lol, I may be biased as a nearly lifelong vegan, but damn, my airplane food always looks so much better than the ones around me. There's practically always nice fresh fruit and salads.

Snort, I had the worst ever chana masala on a flight to London last year. I have no idea what the hell they did to it. It was absolutely horrid. Dry, salty, kind of.... crunchy? Ew. That being said, Boyfriend's chicken didn't look that great either.

We have the problem in our office where the non-veg people eat the veg food and then there's nothing for me. Last time my co-worker actually gave me her cheese pizza because she felt so bad for me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mrbeardedbigbucks on August 10, 2019, 06:10:56 AM
My most petty reason for FIRE:

So I never have to hear someone say "Living the dream" again.

Me: "It's good to see you. How have you been?"
Johnny Office: "you know, living the dream, how about you?"
Me: I walk back to my cubicle and stick hot forks in my ears and eyeballs so I never have to hear or see that person again
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on August 10, 2019, 11:14:21 AM
My most petty reason for FIRE:

So I never have to hear someone say "Living the dream" again.

Me: "It's good to see you. How have you been?"
Johnny Office: "you know, living the dream, how about you?"
Me: I walk back to my cubicle and stick hot forks in my ears and eyeballs so I never have to hear or see that person again
But wait, I am living the dream, six years post-FIRE.  I guess maybe it's different when you really are? OTOH, I think I'd just respond with what I'm actually doing and not a platitude, so there's that.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on August 10, 2019, 12:44:19 PM
My most petty reason for FIRE:

So I never have to hear someone say "Living the dream" again.

Me: "It's good to see you. How have you been?"
Johnny Office: "you know, living the dream, how about you?"
Me: I walk back to my cubicle and stick hot forks in my ears and eyeballs so I never have to hear or see that person again

OMG! Yes! I have two co-workers that constantly use that line.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Live Free on August 10, 2019, 03:55:39 PM
So I never have to hear anyone say they're gonna "shoot you an email" ever again. Other honorable mentions: "touch base," roadmap, "on my radar," "ping," etc.

Do you happen to work as a federal contract specialist? We obsess over all of the phrases in my office, especially 'the road-map'.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: fuzzy math on August 11, 2019, 08:34:35 PM

Hate having to be anywhere by a certain time. Ever. I even resent movie theaters for making me be somewhere by a certain time


I totally feel this way too
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on August 12, 2019, 06:56:03 AM
Because this is my first day back in the office and I get washed over by work stress already.

I heard one of my co-workers day that she had been back from work for a week, but it felt already like her vacation was 6 months ago.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on August 12, 2019, 09:19:00 AM
Because this is my first day back in the office and I get washed over by work stress already.

I heard one of my co-workers day that she had been back from work for a week, but it felt already like her vacation was 6 months ago.

I know the feeling, tomorrow is my first day after 3 weeks :(

And I don't even dislike my workplace, I just dislike working in general. I haven't had a vacation this long for years, and we've only been away 1 week, the other 2 weeks were just relaxing at home, doing stuff at my own pace, or doing nothing when I didn't feel like doing anything. I did a little chore every day, worked in the garden most days. I wouldn't mind another month off. I think my first 6 months of FIRE would just be hanging out at home doing exactly this.

The first years I worked I would have an exciting back-to-school feeling after a holiday (I've always loved back-to-school, I was a geeky kid) but after a decade of working that feeling is completely gone.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: sailingTowardsFI on August 12, 2019, 06:47:53 PM
The office lingo is up there for sure...  my recent pet peeve "footstomp" as in "just to footstomp that point".  And also "circle back", "shooting emails", "multiple hats", "too much on my plate", "socialize this idea with the team", "out of pocket",  etc, etc. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: bluebelle on August 14, 2019, 02:27:27 PM
I opened an 'urgent' helpdesk ticket 48 hours ago......company email isn't working on the laptop......only response (via email) was 27 hours ago asking what time was good for a call and asking for my phone number (in the incident)....responded quickly, giving them a time and number.......nothing.

petty reason - not having to deal with the IT help(less) desk
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on August 14, 2019, 07:42:04 PM
I opened an 'urgent' helpdesk ticket 48 hours ago......company email isn't working on the laptop......only response (via email) was 27 hours ago asking what time was good for a call and asking for my phone number (in the incident)....responded quickly, giving them a time and number.......nothing.

petty reason - not having to deal with the IT help(less) desk
They think the same of you, if that's any comfort.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on August 15, 2019, 08:52:15 AM
This one probably sounds petty, but as the days go by, I consider this to be less and less petty.

Someone was hired in the last year that has a habit of doing one loud cough. Frequently.  Like about 1 per minute, or more often.  It is extremely loud.  The best I could describe it as the loud sound that the old pinball machines would make when you get an extra ball.  This person sits several cubicles away from me.  But I hear it all day long.  It is absolutely driving me nuts.  I can't put on headphones/earbuds because I need to be available for folks to talk with me throughout the day about various things.  THIS IS DRIVING ME CRAZY.  It must be so much worse for those who sit closer to this person.

Uugh.


Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on August 15, 2019, 09:08:11 AM
This one probably sounds petty, but as the days go by, I consider this to be less and less petty.

Someone was hired in the last year that has a habit of doing one loud cough. Frequently.  Like about 1 per minute, or more often.  It is extremely loud.  The best I could describe it as the loud sound that the old pinball machines would make when you get an extra ball.  This person sits several cubicles away from me.  But I hear it all day long.  It is absolutely driving me nuts.  I can't put on headphones/earbuds because I need to be available for folks to talk with me throughout the day about various things.  THIS IS DRIVING ME CRAZY.  It must be so much worse for those who sit closer to this person.

Uugh.
I might consult HR on this one.

I have two yappy dogs that will bark for no fucking reason. I absolutely hate being randomly startled. I love the man that came with the dogs, but I won't miss the barking when they're gone. I would lose my mind in your situation. Maybe try recording it?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: PhrugalPhan on August 15, 2019, 10:02:17 AM
So I never have to hear anyone say they're gonna "shoot you an email" ever again. Other honorable mentions: "touch base," roadmap, "on my radar," "ping," etc.

Do you happen to work as a federal contract specialist? We obsess over all of the phrases in my office, especially 'the road-map'.
OMG.... "the road map" has been a thing in my office too for the past two years.  And we have at least another three years of this project.  Kill me now...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on August 15, 2019, 12:24:40 PM
This one probably sounds petty, but as the days go by, I consider this to be less and less petty.

Someone was hired in the last year that has a habit of doing one loud cough. Frequently.  Like about 1 per minute, or more often.  It is extremely loud.  The best I could describe it as the loud sound that the old pinball machines would make when you get an extra ball.  This person sits several cubicles away from me.  But I hear it all day long.  It is absolutely driving me nuts.  I can't put on headphones/earbuds because I need to be available for folks to talk with me throughout the day about various things.  THIS IS DRIVING ME CRAZY.  It must be so much worse for those who sit closer to this person.

Uugh.

The standard therapy would be to make him manager so he sits in a single person office.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bogart99 on August 15, 2019, 12:44:33 PM
I have the same complaint. We have one person who coughs and clears their throat non-stop all day. This has been going on for 20 straight months. I end up having to put in ear buds which leads to my ears hurting and headaches. Every day just motivates more and more to save as much as I can and get out.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Aegishjalmur on August 15, 2019, 02:35:07 PM
I have the same complaint. We have one person who coughs and clears their throat non-stop all day. This has been going on for 20 straight months. I end having to put in ear buds which leads to my ears hurting and headaches. Every day just motivates more and more to save as much as I can and get out.

We had a guy in the office who we referred to as the 'Office Ninja' because when he would sneeze, it would sound like the 'Hi-yah!' that you hear in martial arts films, only he would do it several times in a row and it was loud enough that you could hear clearly down at the other end of the floor(300+ ft), and during spring and fall, it would be multiple times a day. I am just glad I didn't sit near him because it would startle the hell out of me to hear someone do that that close to me.....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Omy on August 15, 2019, 04:19:24 PM
At a previous job, my office mate (who was older and not well) would often fall asleep in his chair. His snoring drove me crazy and was so loud that people walking by could hear it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Missy B on August 16, 2019, 10:33:52 AM
I have the same complaint. We have one person who coughs and clears their throat non-stop all day. This has been going on for 20 straight months. I end having to put in ear buds which leads to my ears hurting and headaches. Every day just motivates more and more to save as much as I can and get out.

We had a guy in the office who we referred to as the 'Office Ninja' because when he would sneeze, it would sound like the 'Hi-yah!' that you hear in martial arts films, only he would do it several times in a row and it was loud enough that you could hear clearly down at the other end of the floor(300+ ft), and during spring and fall, it would be multiple times a day. I am just glad I didn't sit near him because it would startle the hell out of me to hear someone do that that close to me.....

Had a coworker who ninja-sneezed. One time I said to him, 'you know it is possible to sneeze without using your vocal chords. It's a conscious choice.' And he said, 'maybe for YOU,' and smirked. He made a point of being noisy - slapping the desk, etc - because he wanted attention all the time. This was in an environment that is meant to be quiet because we're seeing clients.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Kazyan on August 16, 2019, 11:18:17 AM
My coworker is a good guy, but the way he clears his throat can be picked up on a seismometer.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Missy B on August 18, 2019, 11:21:22 PM
Thought of a good reason today! Because I don't want to have to wear a bra during the week :)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on August 19, 2019, 04:59:43 AM
I don't want to have to share a toilet with people who don't use the brush after their number two visit. (I know it is not normal operating procedure in the US to use the brush, but in Europe it is.)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Anette on August 19, 2019, 01:16:59 PM
Good one Linea, fellow European here
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rantk81 on August 19, 2019, 01:20:23 PM
I don't want to have to share a toilet with people who don't use the brush after their number two visit. (I know it is not normal operating procedure in the US to use the brush, but in Europe it is.)

Most public restrooms don't even have toilet brushes visible or in plain view.  Maybe the toilet at your location has the "water savings" set a bit too aggressive?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: markbike528CBX on August 19, 2019, 02:20:57 PM
I don't want to have to share a toilet with people who don't use the brush after their number two visit. (I know it is not normal operating procedure in the US to use the brush, but in Europe it is.)

Ding ding, winner! 
  A) It is restricted culturally, therefore others not of that culture might see it as petty.
  B) Anything to do with a number two visit is automatically funny in most cultures and so does include most everybody.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Warlord1986 on September 01, 2019, 07:11:02 PM
Thought of a good reason today! Because I don't want to have to wear a bra during the week :)

That is an excellent reason.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on September 09, 2019, 11:02:12 AM
My most petty reason for FIRE:

So I never have to hear someone say "Living the dream" again.

Me: "It's good to see you. How have you been?"
Johnny Office: "you know, living the dream, how about you?"
Me: I walk back to my cubicle and stick hot forks in my ears and eyeballs so I never have to hear or see that person again

You should reply like I do sometimes with "Nightmares are dreams, too."
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on September 09, 2019, 02:02:18 PM
I've mentioned previously that I provide/dispatch support for technical equipment.  Today I took a phone call from an educator (or at least that's how they described themselves) with a piece of our equipment who stated early in the conversation that they were using that equipment to teach students this field of science.  I spoke in jargon; they didn't understand.  I asked them to describe the issue in thier own words; they couldn't.  I simplified my questions (resorting to some wonderful descriptions I've learned from long suffering support staff who've had to call in requests for service because the trained end users delegated the task of speaking to another human.); they didn't understand.  I gave up and dispatched someone to go onsite and there's going to be a hefty fee.  The educator was upset.  Too bad, so sad.  If you knew what you were teaching, there's a very good chance I could have helped you over the phone.  AAARRGGGGH!

tl;dr: I have a fair amount of STEM to everyman translation skills.  Today an @$$ tried to shame me for being female in a technical role.  I am done with customers who don't know what they're talking about pretending they're better than me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: fattest_foot on September 09, 2019, 04:10:12 PM
Agile is bullshit, especially if you need to do deeper thought or have a project that takes longer than your sprint. I don’t mind the daily stand ups, but sometimes you have to get creative with your updates to make it sound like you did something. Some days you can knock out a ton of stories, some days you bang your head against the wall trying every iteration you can think of to get something working.

My beef with agile is all the terminology is meaningless unless you’ve taken an agile class. Scrum master? Release train engineer? Agile coach?  They are completely inscrutable terms unless you have a glossary. Even if you have a glossary, what the people in those positions do still seems kind of unclear.

Plus, they are another layer of people that aren’t directly contributing to software development. They’re not coding, testing, or doing technical support for your customers. It just seems like they are there to make you feel bad because you didn’t do what you planned to do for the sprint because you hit a technical roadblock. Or they give you shit because you messed up some report in Jira because you moved a card to the wrong status.

It made sense to me when I did an Agile class and they talked about the different "flavors" of Agile. And by flavor, I mean companies that are trying to sell Agile as a product. To differentiate themselves, they came up with different terminology. Instead of a project, it's "stories" or "epics" etc. A manager is "scrum master" or "product owner." Scrum Alliance has different terminology than Scaled Agile who has different terminology than the International Consortium for Agile.

When I looked at it as a product being sold, it made me dislike the concept even more. They only invented new words for things to confuse people and try to sell them a new "process." And that's BS to me. They all have their own certification structure, and none of them work well as a process together.

Which to me means the entire thing is a waste of time. A process doesn't need a company behind it selling you on it. It should stand on its own. Agile is just the newest buzzword in the string of leans and kanbans (which it heavily borrows from).

Do you happen to work as a federal contract specialist? We obsess over all of the phrases in my office, especially 'the road-map'.

Used to be a contract specialist here. My work now is similar, but more on the program management side (we do a lot of the pre-award documentation, and we're all CORs). Contracts is such a horrendous career field. It may have just been our contracts office, but I feel bad for anyone stuck in it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on September 09, 2019, 11:28:00 PM
Agile is bullshit, especially if you need to do deeper thought or have a project that takes longer than your sprint. I don’t mind the daily stand ups, but sometimes you have to get creative with your updates to make it sound like you did something. Some days you can knock out a ton of stories, some days you bang your head against the wall trying every iteration you can think of to get something working.

My beef with agile is all the terminology is meaningless unless you’ve taken an agile class. Scrum master? Release train engineer? Agile coach?  They are completely inscrutable terms unless you have a glossary. Even if you have a glossary, what the people in those positions do still seems kind of unclear.

Plus, they are another layer of people that aren’t directly contributing to software development. They’re not coding, testing, or doing technical support for your customers. It just seems like they are there to make you feel bad because you didn’t do what you planned to do for the sprint because you hit a technical roadblock. Or they give you shit because you messed up some report in Jira because you moved a card to the wrong status.

It made sense to me when I did an Agile class and they talked about the different "flavors" of Agile. And by flavor, I mean companies that are trying to sell Agile as a product. To differentiate themselves, they came up with different terminology. Instead of a project, it's "stories" or "epics" etc. A manager is "scrum master" or "product owner." Scrum Alliance has different terminology than Scaled Agile who has different terminology than the International Consortium for Agile.

When I looked at it as a product being sold, it made me dislike the concept even more. They only invented new words for things to confuse people and try to sell them a new "process." And that's BS to me. They all have their own certification structure, and none of them work well as a process together.

Which to me means the entire thing is a waste of time. A process doesn't need a company behind it selling you on it. It should stand on its own. Agile is just the newest buzzword in the string of leans and kanbans (which it heavily borrows from).

Do you happen to work as a federal contract specialist? We obsess over all of the phrases in my office, especially 'the road-map'.

Used to be a contract specialist here. My work now is similar, but more on the program management side (we do a lot of the pre-award documentation, and we're all CORs). Contracts is such a horrendous career field. It may have just been our contracts office, but I feel bad for anyone stuck in it.

I work with the scrum-nomsense as well. As least, the last 1,5 year or so, we don't have an external scrum master, but just one of the team members. That's a little better. My job is so that there is a lot to do and I just do it, I organize things, check things, test things, write things, report things, maintain a tool, etc. I really don't feel the need to put every thing I do in tasks on the scrum board, which is just more overhead. I totally hate those daily meetings. As well as the very long planning meetings.

Still 66 scrum meetings to go until FIRE... :-)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: An Unassuming Moose on September 11, 2019, 09:35:25 PM
I want to play Ultimate Frisbee two evenings a week rather than one. Don't know if it counts as petty, but I play with coworkers and it's turned into a bit of a joke.
Working in the construction industry, we have to work evenings fairly frequently in the summer, so I can't commit to more than one evening a week. But one day, I'll retire so I can play more Frisbee...
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on September 12, 2019, 07:57:29 AM
During FIRE I hope I never again have to sit in meetings that take 15-20 to get started, with the person operating the computer that is on display, being the slowest to do anything on it.

Of course, as a FIREe you can still end up going to board meetings, HOA kind of meetings, club meetings, etc. I should try to be reluctant to sign up for those, for my own sanity.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on September 12, 2019, 02:47:06 PM
During FIRE I hope I never again have to sit in meetings that take 15-20 to get started, with the person operating the computer that is on display, being the slowest to do anything on it.

Of course, as a FIREe you can still end up going to board meetings, HOA kind of meetings, club meetings, etc. I should try to be reluctant to sign up for those, for my own sanity.

The difference is you can just walk out for those 15 minutes and make a few fitness moves ;)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FamilyGuy on September 12, 2019, 08:20:32 PM
Peace of mind. Freedom from compelled  to work. Travel. Watch TV whenever I want to. Visiting parents whenever I want to. Driving the town in Wednesday afternoon is a dream for me.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on September 13, 2019, 07:17:13 AM
Peace of mind. Freedom from compelled  to work. Travel. Watch TV whenever I want to. Visiting parents whenever I want to. Driving the town in Wednesday afternoon is a dream for me.
Hey now, some of those are very much *not* petty at all!  Although I *do* appreciate driving empty streets and visiting empty stores during the day :)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Nick_Miller on September 13, 2019, 08:14:15 AM
Driving the town in Wednesday afternoon is a dream for me.

In my fantasies, I only drive from 10 am to 2 pm on weekdays, and no trip is longer than 10 miles. I eat lunch at 11, and dinner at 4 to avoid the rush. And I become a grumpy old man before age 50. Wait...I don't think my wife signed for this.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Philociraptor on September 13, 2019, 12:44:54 PM
Driving the town in Wednesday afternoon is a dream for me.

In my fantasies, I only drive from 10 am to 2 pm on weekdays, and no trip is longer than 10 miles. I eat lunch at 11, and dinner at 4 to avoid the rush. And I become a grumpy old man before age 50. Wait...I don't think my wife signed for this.

To be fair I'm a grumpy old man at age 30, so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FamilyGuy on September 13, 2019, 04:27:38 PM
Peace of mind. Freedom from compelled  to work. Travel. Watch TV whenever I want to. Visiting parents whenever I want to. Driving the town in Wednesday afternoon is a dream for me.
Hey now, some of those are very much *not* petty at all!  Although I *do* appreciate driving empty streets and visiting empty stores during the day :)
Yeah true, some are not petty reasons. I guess I put in all reasons from most important ones to petty little ones.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on September 15, 2019, 01:57:02 AM
I want to be able to decide each day whether I want to go out or not, regardsless of the weather. And not regardless of whether it is weekend or a working day.

And I want to be able to sleep like this morning. For some not understandable readon my alarm clock went off at 6:30 am on a Sunday. I turned it off and slept again until 8. If I could ever sleep to a natural time every day, that would be so great.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: TomTX on September 15, 2019, 01:56:17 PM
Workplace bathrooms.
That's one of the things I'll miss!  "Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime..."

Shouldn't that be "Boss makes a dollar, I drop a deuce..." ;)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: merula on September 16, 2019, 07:33:48 AM
Workplace bathrooms.
That's one of the things I'll miss!  "Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime..."

Shouldn't that be "Boss makes a dollar, I drop a deuce..." ;)

I would suggest you Google the quote above yours.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zamboni on September 16, 2019, 12:22:03 PM
Effort Certification.

I made the mistake of trying to change project percentages on the "Annual Effort Certification Report" one of the first years I was working when it didn't at all reflect how I had spent my time. It got returned to me with a note that I couldn't change it . . . I have to certify it "as is" even if it doesn't match my actual effort.

Other years I've tried just ignoring it and that just gets them to badger me to certify it . . . So I can't ignore it and I can't change it, but most years it doesn't match my actual effort very well. Whatever.

Bear in mind that my employer doesn't have externally billed client hours or anything like that; instead, this is busy work on internal codes created by some pencil pusher.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Fish Sweet on September 17, 2019, 11:42:15 AM
So that I can enjoy the rain!   I want to be able to curl up in a blanket with a hot mug of tea and listen to the patter of raindrops against the window.  I want to go out stomping around in puddles when there's a light drizzle and come home windswept and red-cheeked.  No more of this sitting in front of a computer in professional dress, staring longingly out the window as gray clouds roll in.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: fattest_foot on September 17, 2019, 11:46:01 AM
So that I can enjoy the rain!   I want to be able to curl up in a blanket with a hot mug of tea and listen to the patter of raindrops against the window.  I want to go out stomping around in puddles when there's a light drizzle and come home windswept and red-cheeked.  No more of this sitting in front of a computer in professional dress, staring longingly out the window as gray clouds roll in.

Hey, at least you have windows! Not a single window in this entire building.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on September 17, 2019, 02:07:12 PM
So that I can enjoy the rain!   I want to be able to curl up in a blanket with a hot mug of tea and listen to the patter of raindrops against the window.  I want to go out stomping around in puddles when there's a light drizzle and come home windswept and red-cheeked.  No more of this sitting in front of a computer in professional dress, staring longingly out the window as gray clouds roll in.

Hey, at least you have windows! Not a single window in this entire building.

Windows just set you up for disappointment.  I have one, but it doesn't open.  I spend far too much time pressed up against the glass wishing I could feel the breeze on the other side.  Part time management here runs the AC at far too cold all summer then, switches to far too hot all winter.  Seriously, the winter heat setting is frequently 5-10 degrees F warmer than the summer cool setting (I'll deny this if you repeat it, but I know the settings because someone keeps sneaking into the main office and adjusting them to a more bearable temperature for those of us who work here full time.)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on September 17, 2019, 08:05:12 PM
So that I can enjoy the rain!   I want to be able to curl up in a blanket with a hot mug of tea and listen to the patter of raindrops against the window.  I want to go out stomping around in puddles when there's a light drizzle and come home windswept and red-cheeked.  No more of this sitting in front of a computer in professional dress, staring longingly out the window as gray clouds roll in.

Hey, at least you have windows! Not a single window in this entire building.

Windows just set you up for disappointment.  I have one, but it doesn't open.  I spend far too much time pressed up against the glass wishing I could feel the breeze on the other side.  Part time management here runs the AC at far too cold all summer then, switches to far too hot all winter.  Seriously, the winter heat setting is frequently 5-10 degrees F warmer than the summer cool setting (I'll deny this if you repeat it, but I know the settings because someone keeps sneaking into the main office and adjusting them to a more bearable temperature for those of us who work here full time.)
You don't happen to live/work in Texas, do you?  I remember they kept our offices at 60-62 during the hot summers.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on September 18, 2019, 06:47:33 AM
You don't happen to live/work in Texas, do you?  I remember they kept our offices at 60-62 during the hot summers.

Western North Carolina, but yes, 60-62 inside when its 90+ outside is enough of a temperature difference to physically hurt for a moment each time you walk in or out the door.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: chaskavitch on September 18, 2019, 06:55:00 AM
So that I can enjoy the rain!   I want to be able to curl up in a blanket with a hot mug of tea and listen to the patter of raindrops against the window.  I want to go out stomping around in puddles when there's a light drizzle and come home windswept and red-cheeked.  No more of this sitting in front of a computer in professional dress, staring longingly out the window as gray clouds roll in.

Hey, at least you have windows! Not a single window in this entire building.

Windows just set you up for disappointment.  I have one, but it doesn't open.  I spend far too much time pressed up against the glass wishing I could feel the breeze on the other side.  Part time management here runs the AC at far too cold all summer then, switches to far too hot all winter.  Seriously, the winter heat setting is frequently 5-10 degrees F warmer than the summer cool setting (I'll deny this if you repeat it, but I know the settings because someone keeps sneaking into the main office and adjusting them to a more bearable temperature for those of us who work here full time.)
You don't happen to live/work in Texas, do you?  I remember they kept our offices at 60-62 during the hot summers.

This is my office too, but not quite to that extreme.  It's set to cool if it hits 71 degrees F during the summer, I think, and then warms if it gets below ~75 in the winter.  It's not the biggest swing, but I'd like to be able to maybe wear a sweater to work in the winter and not sweat to death, or not need to bring a cardigan to every single meeting I go to. 

I also switch the temperatures on the days I'm here :)  I'm glad I'm not the only one.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LaineyAZ on September 18, 2019, 08:20:13 AM
Can't remember if this was mentioned, and I am already retired from Megacorp, but for me it was the darned ID badge.

Needing to have your ID on a lanyard around your neck or clipped to your shirt pocket all day.  Needing to badge in every day.  Searching for your badge in your purse.  Needing to keep track of your badge because if you lost it, the fee is $10 to replace it.  And getting a new badge means waiting to catch the "badge shop" during its limited open hours.  Now, I'm living badge free!!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: markbike528CBX on September 18, 2019, 08:32:39 AM
Can't remember if this was mentioned, and I am already retired from Megacorp, but for me it was the darned ID badge.

Needing to have your ID on a lanyard around your neck or clipped to your shirt pocket all day.  Needing to badge in every day.  Searching for your badge in your purse.  Needing to keep track of your badge because if you lost it, the fee is $10 to replace it.  And getting a new badge means waiting to catch the "badge shop" during its limited open hours.  Now, I'm living badge free!!

Ole SemiBigCorp instituted badges for our little, 20 person, shop after I left.
A petty enough reason to STAY  FIREd.
I could see the tidal wave of SemiBigCorp stupidity heading our way, so I left before it hit.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Bucksandreds on September 18, 2019, 08:39:44 AM
I hate having to do anything because I have to do it. My employer is great, plenty of paid time off (6.5 weeks including holidays), understanding, kind and I’m never micromanaged. They pay me well, pay 80% of my families health premiums, match my 401k, etc, etc, etc. I despise every morning that I get up to go, only because I have to go. Comparing my job to 90% of people I should want to work there forever.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Fish Sweet on September 18, 2019, 10:10:00 AM
So that I can enjoy the rain!   I want to be able to curl up in a blanket with a hot mug of tea and listen to the patter of raindrops against the window.  I want to go out stomping around in puddles when there's a light drizzle and come home windswept and red-cheeked.  No more of this sitting in front of a computer in professional dress, staring longingly out the window as gray clouds roll in.

Hey, at least you have windows! Not a single window in this entire building.

Windows just set you up for disappointment.  I have one, but it doesn't open.  I spend far too much time pressed up against the glass wishing I could feel the breeze on the other side.  Part time management here runs the AC at far too cold all summer then, switches to far too hot all winter.  Seriously, the winter heat setting is frequently 5-10 degrees F warmer than the summer cool setting (I'll deny this if you repeat it, but I know the settings because someone keeps sneaking into the main office and adjusting them to a more bearable temperature for those of us who work here full time.)
^ This.  I'm definitely less productive and focused on rainy days because I keep wanting to stare longingly out the windows.

That said, a building with no windows sounds like a torture chamber in the making, holy shit.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Davnasty on September 18, 2019, 10:21:06 AM
So that I can enjoy the rain!   I want to be able to curl up in a blanket with a hot mug of tea and listen to the patter of raindrops against the window.  I want to go out stomping around in puddles when there's a light drizzle and come home windswept and red-cheeked.  No more of this sitting in front of a computer in professional dress, staring longingly out the window as gray clouds roll in.

Sometimes when I wake up on a rainy morning, there's a brief moment where my brain tells me I don't have to go to work today. Then disappointment sets in as I realize days off for rain aren't a thing.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: availablelight on September 19, 2019, 04:10:05 AM
My most petty reason is my number one reason: I want everyone to leave me alone.

Saw the thread title, thought about posting this, saw it in the second reply.  Well done.

Other than that, I never want to hear an alarm clock again*.  I'll also echo others' comments about afternoon naps.

*I'll probably continue to need one for when I inevitably put off packing until late the night before going on a trip that requires taking a train or plane somewhere.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on September 20, 2019, 09:48:45 PM
Other than that, I never want to hear an alarm clock again*.  I'll also echo others' comments about afternoon naps.

*I'll probably continue to need one for when I inevitably put off packing until late the night before going on a trip that requires taking a train or plane somewhere.
I don't mind an alarm clock...for special things.  As an every-day thing, though....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on September 22, 2019, 06:38:07 AM
Other than that, I never want to hear an alarm clock again*.  I'll also echo others' comments about afternoon naps.

*I'll probably continue to need one for when I inevitably put off packing until late the night before going on a trip that requires taking a train or plane somewhere.
I don't mind an alarm clock...for special things.  As an every-day thing, though....
Lol - DH still works, and we normally get up at 5. He's out the door by 5:40. I get up with him, make his breakfast, pack his lunch, then go back to bed. Currently, I'm awake but hoping to fall back to sleep. Just now, he stirred, turned over, looked at the clock and mumbled, in a worried voice,  "Oh baby, no alarm!". "Don't worry, it's Sunday" says Dicey, and back to sleep he goes. Can't wait until he retires!

The surprising part about this story is that I know what day it is.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireLane on September 22, 2019, 03:40:08 PM
So that I can enjoy the rain!   I want to be able to curl up in a blanket with a hot mug of tea and listen to the patter of raindrops against the window.  I want to go out stomping around in puddles when there's a light drizzle and come home windswept and red-cheeked.  No more of this sitting in front of a computer in professional dress, staring longingly out the window as gray clouds roll in.

I love this. And the same goes for snow. I want to stay inside where it's warm and cozy and sip a mug of cocoa while I watch the snow flying.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Missy B on September 22, 2019, 04:54:47 PM
Not having to wear a bra.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on September 30, 2019, 02:14:52 AM
To be able to go on trips and vacations when the circumstances as best, the travel is cheapest and without asking for permission for time off.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Sugaree on October 02, 2019, 09:41:05 AM
To be able to go on trips and vacations when the circumstances as best, the travel is cheapest and without asking for permission for time off.


I've found that having a kiddo in school has been the absolute biggest killer of vacation budgets. 

Though my husband's now-former employer made him buy back PTO (instead of offering LWOP) two weeks before we left for our last big trip.  Then still insinuated that he might not have a job when he got back.  He called her bluff and cleaned out his office before he left...just in case.  The only thing that was ever said after he got back was by another employee that used it as an excuse when she wanted time off ("but he got to take off...why can't I?")
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on October 02, 2019, 01:57:37 PM
To be able to go on trips and vacations when the circumstances as best, the travel is cheapest and without asking for permission for time off.


I've found that having a kiddo in school has been the absolute biggest killer of vacation budgets. 
Heh, that's one of the many benefits of homeschooling--you're not constrained by the public school schedule.  Wanna take a trip to somewhere warm during the winter, but want to avoid the Christmas rush?  No problem, go hit Florida at the end of January! :)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: couponvan on October 02, 2019, 09:59:24 PM
To be able to go on trips and vacations when the circumstances as best, the travel is cheapest and without asking for permission for time off.


I've found that having a kiddo in school has been the absolute biggest killer of vacation budgets. 
Heh, that's one of the many benefits of homeschooling--you're not constrained by the public school schedule.  Wanna take a trip to somewhere warm during the winter, but want to avoid the Christmas rush?  No problem, go hit Florida at the end of January! :)
But then you have to homeschool....pettiest reason to NOT FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: GermanStache on October 03, 2019, 10:09:38 AM
And I want to be able to sleep like this morning. For some not understandable readon my alarm clock went off at 6:30 am on a Sunday. I turned it off and slept again until 8. If I could ever sleep to a natural time every day, that would be so great.
YES!! I would love to sleep until I wake up and not until the alarm decides it is time to wake up.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Vashy on October 05, 2019, 01:37:39 PM
Just getting rid of my three-hour commute and being able to have mid-day naps.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AnnaGrowsAMustache on October 06, 2019, 06:08:11 PM
Not having to wear a bra.

This made me snort laughter!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Mako52 on October 07, 2019, 07:03:40 AM
Corporate politics and backstabbing. 
Pipeline/backlog reports. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Sugaree on October 10, 2019, 05:33:30 AM
So on days when my allergies are kicking my ass, I don't have to drag my ass into the office because calling in sick the day before an already long weekend is frowned upon.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on October 10, 2019, 06:55:10 AM
So I don't have to listen to co-workers' and clients' racist and homophobic talk.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on October 10, 2019, 07:20:15 AM
So that I no longer need to pretend what we are talking about her at the office, if the technical details go way above my not so technical head.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: lisabobisa on October 10, 2019, 08:13:16 AM
Teacher here.... my petty reasons:
1) Because of recent events in schools, all doors have to be locked at all times, which means I have to get up 20 billion times a day to open the door for silly reasons!  LEAVE ME (and my class) ALONE!!
2) Not having to wake up with an alarm
3) Being able to go to the gym at 1 pm which is the slowest time, vs. 5 am and 7 pm which are the busiest times!
4) Books.... all the books.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Lgx on October 10, 2019, 03:33:23 PM
I never want to be forced to log into ADP to request an off day ever again. If it please ye, sire, I ask that you approve 1 of my 14 days to not have to be here in this wretched hellscape.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on October 10, 2019, 04:50:16 PM
No more bus rides with 12 year olds who get motion sickness.  Excursions.  Meh.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Adventine on October 11, 2019, 03:40:18 AM
No more having to witness coworkers cutting their nails at their desks!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Sandi_k on October 11, 2019, 01:26:04 PM
- Only having to talk to the people that I choose to.

- No more meetings!

- Being able to live with my normal body clock: go to bed ~ midnight, get up ~ 7:30 am.

- More time with the cats. DH spends way more time with him, so my cat now prefers him.

- Having coffee on the deck in the morning, instead of in my car.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: vand on October 23, 2019, 02:19:17 AM
I honestly don't mind my work as it is currently, but one thing I will certainly not miss when I eventually leave this place is the insufferable crapchat of the Sales department who are unfortunately located right next to my desk (I'mone of the quiet ones in IT).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ATS on October 23, 2019, 10:50:14 AM
The lighting in the bathroom on my floor at work is horrible - I can't figure out how they've designed a lighting situation that shows every gray hair, stray chin hair, wrinkle, blemish while giving you the complexion of an anemic jaundice sufferer.

You can't avoid seeing yourself - there is a giant mirror above the sinks.

I leave the house thinking I'm looking cute, visit the bathroom and I'm depressed at how old, tired and yellow I look and how did a chin hair grow 2 inches overnight?

I'm only looking in the mirror in flattering lighting after I FIRE.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: techwiz on October 23, 2019, 11:07:27 AM
Sick of the politics and the deeper I go into why things are done and trying to solve all the problems the more I am disillusioned.  I want to stop giving a @#$! and focus on something else.


Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: EscapedApe on October 23, 2019, 11:12:14 AM
Sounds like most of the reasons listed in this thread amount to...

"Not having to put up with people's bullshit"

...which is a great reason to want to RE. It's not petty at all.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: vand on October 25, 2019, 03:59:25 AM
You know when a birthday/leaving/baby/whatever card is passed around the office for you to sign and contribute towards... you duly do your bit and then find some poor shmuck who hasn't yet signed/contributed to pass the whole thing on to, thereby taking it off your hands.... yeah, I won't miss that ONE BIT.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Schaefer Light on October 28, 2019, 03:11:48 PM
To avoid the constant stress of feeling rushed to do things.  I always try to get my work done as quickly as I can without sacrificing quality.  I don't need someone emailing me at 10AM to say they need my solution for a client by noon.  But once I see the email I bust my ass to get it done in the 2 hours I've been given.  And then I hate myself for being such a people-pleaser.  What I should do is start missing these deadlines on purpose.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on October 28, 2019, 05:03:13 PM
To avoid the constant stress of feeling rushed to do things.  I always try to get my work done as quickly as I can without sacrificing quality.  I don't need someone emailing me at 10AM to say they need my solution for a client by noon.  But once I see the email I bust my ass to get it done in the 2 hours I've been given.  And then I hate myself for being such a people-pleaser.  What I should do is start missing these deadlines on purpose.
This is me too and I kind of hate it!  I was proud of myself today though, there was a thing that I do every day that usually takes me 5 or so minutes, but for some reason there was a few hours worth of work today.  So I did some of it and told them the rest would get done when I had time.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on October 29, 2019, 01:38:23 AM
To avoid the constant stress of feeling rushed to do things.  I always try to get my work done as quickly as I can without sacrificing quality.  I don't need someone emailing me at 10AM to say they need my solution for a client by noon.  But once I see the email I bust my ass to get it done in the 2 hours I've been given.  And then I hate myself for being such a people-pleaser.  What I should do is start missing these deadlines on purpose.
This is me too and I kind of hate it!  I was proud of myself today though, there was a thing that I do every day that usually takes me 5 or so minutes, but for some reason there was a few hours worth of work today.  So I did some of it and told them the rest would get done when I had time.

DH sometimes gets requests from people in other departments who have not informed him of an assignment, but contact DH Friday at noon and stress him to add his part of the deal before Friday afternoon (4 pm). In the past DH would stress about such things and was very disappointed that they hadn't warned him earlier. Now he just laughs at them and ignores them.

It is important to set boundaries for your coworkers, but it certainly helps to have some FU money.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Malkynn on October 29, 2019, 05:19:41 AM
Allergies + medical mask = gross
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on October 29, 2019, 10:56:41 AM
Allergies + medical mask = gross

LMAO - been there.  My sympathies.  Although it is good for the non-allergy sufferers in your close proximity....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: vand on October 29, 2019, 01:23:21 PM
Timesheets. Filling in sodding, pointless, justify-your-existence timesheets.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: techwiz on October 29, 2019, 02:41:53 PM
Having to redo work which was already done by another team who were incompetent. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Schaefer Light on October 29, 2019, 03:02:28 PM
Having to redo work which was already done by another team who were incompetent.
Or having to redo work because the process has changed (again) and now the work you did last week can't be used because there's a new process in place....which you didn't know you needed to follow when you did the work the first time.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on October 29, 2019, 04:15:19 PM
So today someone was asking me about a thing I do every day, and I honestly don't know who, if anyone, actually needs that work to be done.  Turns out that it's likely that literally no one actually needs this work done, bah!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireHiker on October 29, 2019, 04:40:05 PM
internal audit and DFARS compliance
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: techwiz on October 29, 2019, 07:55:23 PM
Or having to redo work because the process has changed (again) and now the work you did last week can't be used because there's a new process in place....which you didn't know you needed to follow when you did the work the first time.

So true! new process or you must submit it in a new format using a new template (because they just updated it).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AnnaGrowsAMustache on October 30, 2019, 03:00:37 AM
So today someone was asking me about a thing I do every day, and I honestly don't know who, if anyone, actually needs that work to be done.  Turns out that it's likely that literally no one actually needs this work done, bah!

Been there. A large part of my previous job was creating reports that I could demonstrate had not been accessed by anyone for years. Not only that, but the reports were so badly thought out that they weren't even close to measuring what they were so supposed to be measuring. Do you think I could convince anyone that they were a waste of time???
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on October 30, 2019, 03:30:12 AM
Having to redo work which was already done by another team who were incompetent.
Or having to redo work because the process has changed (again) and now the work you did last week can't be used because there's a new process in place....which you didn't know you needed to follow when you did the work the first time.

Or like my DH: having repair the relationship with unhappy customers because your coworker who delivered a report to the customer is so incredibly incompetent. DH has now stepped down from being the manager and is happy that it is now not him who needs to talk to these customers.

And before you ask: in Norway it is not at all easy to get someone fired. You always have to give the employee another chance and document for a long time in detail what went wrong. And even then it is a long and probably expensive process. DH has done all this documentation and had the talks with the employee, and given the coworker a 0% salary increase in the hope that he would quit voluntarily. But so he is still there. We think the rumor of his incompetence has spread through the branch and he cannot easily get another job. DH handed over the employee file to the new manager, so that he has an easier process to fire the guy.

The coworker normally asks DH loads of questions per day to get his work done, even though he has 7 years of experience and shouldn't need to do this. Now he asked DH about his "year off" period in 2020. Would DH be accessible by phone in 2020 for professional questions? ;-)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on October 30, 2019, 06:00:35 AM
Not getting an email response from anyone at the audit client

It's been a couple weeks, and I've emailed a handful of people with zero response. As far as I know, my emails are just going to spam.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dragonswan on October 30, 2019, 06:45:20 AM
Every few years there's a new management philosophy that makes the rounds and I'm tired of buying in, checking in, total quality management, LEAN, 6 Sigma, Briggs Myers, It's your Ship, and all the rest of the crap that amounts to do more and work harder with less and less and less.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on October 30, 2019, 06:50:22 AM
Every few years there's a new management philosophy that makes the rounds and I'm tired of buying in, checking in, total quality management, LEAN, 6 Sigma, Briggs Myers, It's your Ship, and all the rest of the crap that amounts to do more and work harder with less and less and less.

I was just interviewed by my manager about what I thought of the company, as part of learning from those who are leaving.
I mentioned that I wasn't going to tell her anything new, as I am in general an open person who takes up things immediately. But I did tell her what I thought about the management who always want to do multiple big projects at the same time, not seeing the realism in how you can meet those deadlines. And that the budget cuts they are doing now are on the wrong things (like the Christmas dinner at a restaurant, the weekly training sessions, education).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dragonswan on October 30, 2019, 09:42:35 AM
Did she listen politely but indicate there is nothing they can do?  'Cause that's usually the response to legitimate concerns.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on October 30, 2019, 10:07:03 AM
So today someone was asking me about a thing I do every day, and I honestly don't know who, if anyone, actually needs that work to be done.  Turns out that it's likely that literally no one actually needs this work done, bah!

You would be surprised in how many cases that is true.

 (Amazon) Bullshit Jobs, David Graeber (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B075RWG7YM/ref=sr_1_1?__mk_de_DE=%C3%85M%C3%85%C5%BD%C3%95%C3%91&crid=2A3X2DMROSX5&keywords=bullshot+jobs+david+graeber&qid=1572451472&sprefix=bullshit+jobs%2Caps%2C284&sr=8-1)
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: By the River on October 30, 2019, 11:53:40 AM
So today someone was asking me about a thing I do every day, and I honestly don't know who, if anyone, actually needs that work to be done.  Turns out that it's likely that literally no one actually needs this work done, bah!

This quote was immediately above 1 that said Internal Audit was their petty reason.  I'm in Audit and think one of the most satisfying part of the work is finding inefficiencies when auditing a process.  Last audit, talked to a employee who says they do task x which takes about 6 hours a month.   Investigate and find that a system option can be turned on and automate that process (I had worked on system implementation and thought no one had ever investigated it).   I hope my temporary PITA audit requests will be offset by reducing hours/problem/issues in the future.  Other satisfying thing is finding fraud, least satisfying: documenting all that stuff.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on October 30, 2019, 12:07:10 PM
Did she listen politely but indicate there is nothing they can do?  'Cause that's usually the response to legitimate concerns.

If that was a question to me, then yes, she listened and even agreed with me most things, like the lack of cleaning of the lady's loo, the acoustics on our floor. And anyway, what I told here now isn't to be solved for me, but maybe for my coworkers. They can do with my answers whatever they want.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on October 30, 2019, 06:43:16 PM
So today someone was asking me about a thing I do every day, and I honestly don't know who, if anyone, actually needs that work to be done.  Turns out that it's likely that literally no one actually needs this work done, bah!

This quote was immediately above 1 that said Internal Audit was their petty reason.  I'm in Audit and think one of the most satisfying part of the work is finding inefficiencies when auditing a process.  Last audit, talked to a employee who says they do task x which takes about 6 hours a month.   Investigate and find that a system option can be turned on and automate that process (I had worked on system implementation and thought no one had ever investigated it).   I hope my temporary PITA audit requests will be offset by reducing hours/problem/issues in the future.  Other satisfying thing is finding fraud, least satisfying: documenting all that stuff.
One of the things I like to do is automate or simplify the things that I do, I am always looking for opportunities to simplify.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on October 31, 2019, 07:18:53 PM
Not getting an email response from anyone at the audit client

It's been a couple weeks, and I've emailed a handful of people with zero response. As far as I know, my emails are just going to spam.

Yeah this is terrible. I know they hate me because I do (internal) tax audits and they don't want to confess that they messed up. But I'm internal, if you are honest and reply to my e-mail and don't refuse meeting requests, I can help you out and fix the mess together before the external tax people show up.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on November 04, 2019, 12:49:48 PM
I'm tired of pretending to be interested in football. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 05, 2019, 01:35:06 AM
So that I don't have to look at the overly full trash can in our open office area. If I remember correctly, the can has been pretty full since Thursday and overly full since Friday. Today on Tuesday morning 9:30 am, it is still overly full.

At home I hate full trash cans, so I normally have a good routine to empty them before they flow over.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: techwiz on November 05, 2019, 09:01:05 AM
Being told to do things that make no sense. Decisions based on what is in our upper management's performance agreements, which were written without the data or analysis. It drives me crazy that we allocating resources to these things that make zero fiscal sense. What is worse I get told to make it happen, and also help justify the political BS.

   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 05, 2019, 09:09:06 AM
Being told to do things that make no sense. Decisions based on what is in our upper management's performance agreements, which were written without the data or analysis. It drives me crazy that we allocating resources to these things that make zero fiscal sense. What is worse I get told to make it happen, and also help justify the political BS.

   

Sounds familiar, we do that with whole projects. Decisions are always made by the managers who don't know how complicated the existing system is, or how complicated it is to build a new, bug free software system is. Our current plan is to alter a new system and integrate it with the old existing system. I am happy to be FIREd next year, because I think it will be difficult to test this new system.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: MKinVA on November 05, 2019, 09:48:05 AM
Having to hang around with people I don't like. You go to school and are stuck with the other kids who happen to have been born at the same time. Then you go to work and have to hang around with the people who were hired at the same place as you. Now, after FIRE, I don't have to hang around with anyone I don't want to...for the first time in my life! Yay!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on November 05, 2019, 10:05:27 AM
I don't want to care about Daylight Savings Time.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 05, 2019, 10:56:08 AM
I don't want to care about Daylight Savings Time.

From what I have heard, Europe was planning to have only one time, no daylight savings time. I could even send in a vote. They were still figuring out whether to keep summer time or winter time.
I was really looking forward to have only one time, but it has been suspiciously quiet around the subject. We will wait and see if the 2020 spring is the last time we switch to summer time and keep it there....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: romasur on November 05, 2019, 11:06:44 AM
Never again having to talk in fake chirpiness to keep up morale for people + tasks I don't particularly care for.

I'm willing to be friendly, decent and polite but the exaggerated affability in American work culture always made me wince.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on November 05, 2019, 05:41:03 PM
Having to talk up year 12's confidence before their exams when realistically they should have done lots more work 6 months ago.  I dislike having to be less than honest.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: nancyfrank232 on November 05, 2019, 10:03:52 PM
Never again having to talk in fake chirpiness to keep up morale for people + tasks I don't particularly care for.

I'm willing to be friendly, decent and polite but the exaggerated affability in American work culture always made me wince.

This is what parents do with their kids
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Focus_on_the_fire on November 06, 2019, 06:17:08 AM
Agile is the worst.  A complete destroyer of productivity.

Can I add "metrics" to that too?

We are a "performance-based" organization, so the other hostages and I spend hours with multiple tracking systems to generate metrics that no one looks at.

When something goes sideways on a project, we have to go through a three hour IEG (Important Expectation Gap) meeting. And, oh yeah, we don't look at the metrics in those meetings either.   
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Anoushka on November 06, 2019, 06:29:22 AM
I'm tired of pretending to be interested in football.

Ha! I love this one. I'm pretty sure this is a reason for my husband to get out of the workforce too.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Focus_on_the_fire on November 06, 2019, 07:43:07 AM
Every few years there's a new management philosophy that makes the rounds and I'm tired of buying in, checking in, total quality management, LEAN, 6 Sigma, Briggs Myers, It's your Ship, and all the rest of the crap that amounts to do more and work harder with less and less and less.

Thank you!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: albireo13 on November 06, 2019, 11:49:23 AM
Tired of creating and managing CYA documentation.  Documents which get archived in our controlled doc center "vaults" never to be seen or read again by a breathing person.

What a brutal waste of time and energy.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisyedwards800 on November 07, 2019, 10:27:31 AM
I absolutely hate waking up early.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisyedwards800 on November 07, 2019, 10:28:06 AM
I also hate wearing tights.  I HATE THEM.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on November 07, 2019, 10:31:17 AM
I also hate wearing tights.  I HATE THEM.

Are tights a requirement for you to do your job?  If not, can you just stop wearing them?  Maybe switch to something else? (pants?)

wait - are you a superhero?  Is there a cape required as well?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Daisyedwards800 on November 07, 2019, 11:02:43 AM
I also hate wearing tights.  I HATE THEM.

Are tights a requirement for you to do your job?  If not, can you just stop wearing them?  Maybe switch to something else? (pants?)

wait - are you a superhero?  Is there a cape required as well?

Pants are ok but I  have about 20-30 minutes of walking and 8 months of the year it's like 30 degrees or below, so the types of pants that are comfortable are also really not insulated enough.  I'm allergic to wool so I can't wear wool pants either (business workplace so I'm stuck with materials like polyester, which are fine but are not warm).  So my only option is to wear skirts with tights if I want to be really warm.  Jeans work fine too but I can't wear those to work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 07, 2019, 11:29:34 AM
I also hate wearing tights.  I HATE THEM.

Are tights a requirement for you to do your job?  If not, can you just stop wearing them?  Maybe switch to something else? (pants?)

wait - are you a superhero?  Is there a cape required as well?

Pants are ok but I  have about 20-30 minutes of walking and 8 months of the year it's like 30 degrees or below, so the types of pants that are comfortable are also really not insulated enough.  I'm allergic to wool so I can't wear wool pants either (business workplace so I'm stuck with materials like polyester, which are fine but are not warm).  So my only option is to wear skirts with tights if I want to be really warm.  Jeans work fine too but I can't wear those to work.

@Daisyedwards800

You could ware something over your pants, like a pair of rain trousers. That gives an extra layer of insulation and keeps the wind out. In my experience this works very well. Also easy to take off at arrival.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Cali4en on November 07, 2019, 04:20:43 PM
Our small company got bought by a much larger international firm owned by a complete a-hole and I so loved telling him off in front of the entire international staff of his company.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dcheesi on November 08, 2019, 08:56:08 AM
Our small company got bought by a much larger international firm owned by a complete a-hole and I so loved telling him off in front of the entire international staff of his company.
Sounds like an awesome FU-money story!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 11, 2019, 04:51:34 AM
I want more privacy during the day. Currently sitting in an open office situation, but with a wall behind me. Still people sitting very close to me. This is challenging when I want to clean my nose. Or when I want to take a lady's towel to the bathroom. Or showing something private on my screen. Or taking a phone call.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SwissMiss on November 11, 2019, 09:21:44 AM
I feel you on this one, Linea-Norway. Hang in there, you’re soon FIRE!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: asauer on November 11, 2019, 09:32:21 AM
I love these!  Here's mine; I don't want to have to laugh at another incompetent executives jokes again.  And, I don't want to have to wear makeup.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on November 11, 2019, 05:24:01 PM
Saving others arse's when they are incompetent.  I am responsible for writing an exam, collaborating with another colleague, and they haven't put together anything worthwhile despite repeated requests.  Now the final exam needs to be shared with the department, and I finish off their section because it needs to be appropriate for the students.

I need to stop caring so much.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: rocketpj on November 12, 2019, 01:53:05 AM
Making vacation requests.  I hate it and don't do it anymore since I switched to self employed + casual work.

Still have to work but I will never ever put myself in the situation where I must request a vacation or day off and have it arbitrarily refused for no operational reason.  Which happened constantly in my last full time job - I had to go through hell to get time off to attend my son's birth, and took passive aggressive grief over it for about 5 years afterwards.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Schaefer Light on November 12, 2019, 06:11:49 AM
I'm tired of pretending to be interested in football.
I'm tired of pretending to be interested in my job.

I'm also tired of not being able to get anything done on my own at work.  I do about 5 minutes of actual work and then realize I need someone else to provide input or approve something.  So I reach out to them and wait.  I start another task and work for 5 minutes and run into the same damn thing.  So I reach out to someone else and wait again.  I'm never able to work independently for long enough to get into any kind of rhythm (much less a state of "flow").  As someone who thrives on solo work, this is driving me insane.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 12, 2019, 07:42:42 AM
I am currently getting nuts of the tool that we bought (with me in the lead). And I need to find a way to work with it. So farm there is no solution.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AlanStache on November 13, 2019, 05:56:49 AM
My company rarely has meetings but the one we just had took the cake.  Picture Ben Stein in Ferris Buellers Day Off but reading a list of towns in Iowa and there relative distances to each other; and this information was fascinating to my boss. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dragonswan on November 13, 2019, 11:47:48 AM
I also hate wearing tights.  I HATE THEM.

Are tights a requirement for you to do your job?  If not, can you just stop wearing them?  Maybe switch to something else? (pants?)

wait - are you a superhero?  Is there a cape required as well?

Pants are ok but I  have about 20-30 minutes of walking and 8 months of the year it's like 30 degrees or below, so the types of pants that are comfortable are also really not insulated enough.  I'm allergic to wool so I can't wear wool pants either (business workplace so I'm stuck with materials like polyester, which are fine but are not warm).  So my only option is to wear skirts with tights if I want to be really warm.  Jeans work fine too but I can't wear those to work.

Try wearing leggings under your pants (the cotton and spandex kind not the poly shiny stuff).  I use this method and I'm quite toasty and comfy.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on November 13, 2019, 01:35:42 PM
Making vacation requests.  I hate it and don't do it anymore since I switched to self employed + casual work.

Still have to work but I will never ever put myself in the situation where I must request a vacation or day off and have it arbitrarily refused for no operational reason.  Which happened constantly in my last full time job - I had to go through hell to get time off to attend my son's birth, and took passive aggressive grief over it for about 5 years afterwards.
Here in socialist Germany not only the mother get maternal leave for up to a year, but also the father can get 3 month. (If I am right the 3 month are substracted from the mother's time and you could also do mother 3 month father 9.)
You don't even need to take it in one go, my boss just got back from a 1 month time and will take the 2 month later (in that year).
The state pays 60% of the income during that time and employers must put you in the same or similar position when you come back.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireHiker on November 13, 2019, 02:23:16 PM
Today's reason: annual training at work. It used to take 2 hours a year. Now we're up to 7.5. Ugh.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on November 13, 2019, 03:41:03 PM
Today's reason: annual training at work. It used to take 2 hours a year. Now we're up to 7.5. Ugh.

Yes! Training.  Definitely won't miss that after I take the leap. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ApacheStache on November 13, 2019, 06:41:06 PM
We have a fancy overpriced oversized coffee machine at work — this thing is probably 3 feet tall and likely costs a few thousand dollars. Unfortunately the coffee tastes like watered-down dirt water and sadness :(
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on November 14, 2019, 06:52:57 AM
We have a fancy overpriced oversized coffee machine at work — this thing is probably 3 feet tall and likely costs a few thousand dollars. Unfortunately the coffee tastes like watered-down dirt water and sadness :(
I was going to ask what sad work coffee tastes like, but I suppose any coffee from work is sad coffee :-(
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 14, 2019, 07:17:05 AM
We have a fancy overpriced oversized coffee machine at work — this thing is probably 3 feet tall and likely costs a few thousand dollars. Unfortunately the coffee tastes like watered-down dirt water and sadness :(
I was going to ask what sad work coffee tastes like, but I suppose any coffee from work is sad coffee :-(

I am not a coffee drinker, but we have sad chocolate milk at work, from a similar fancy looking machine. The end product just doesn't have much taste at all, it is watery.

Luckily for me, someone has put a pot of cacao beside it, so I always put two spoons of cacao powder in my cup, before I select chocolate milk from the machine. After some mixing, it becomes acceptable.

Home made chocolate milk with chunks of dark chocolate melted into milk and some herbs added is of course even better, but makes you fat.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DeskJockey2028 on November 14, 2019, 07:53:11 AM
One feature we have at work is what I call "Lowest Bidder Coffee".  Essentially, work buys massive amounts of the cheapest coffee available. It's brown, usually has a slight oily sheen to it and on a good day, tastes like licking the outside of a Starbucks cup.

We have a fancy overpriced oversized coffee machine at work — this thing is probably 3 feet tall and likely costs a few thousand dollars. Unfortunately the coffee tastes like watered-down dirt water and sadness :(
I was going to ask what sad work coffee tastes like, but I suppose any coffee from work is sad coffee :-(
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on November 14, 2019, 09:19:36 AM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on November 14, 2019, 09:21:31 AM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh

Is there any other kind of drawer in a fridge?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: techwiz on November 14, 2019, 09:33:56 AM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh

Is there any other kind of drawer in a fridge?

Vegetable crisper!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on November 14, 2019, 09:37:30 AM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh

Is there any other kind of drawer in a fridge?

Are you throwing shade?  Or just unfamiliar with common kitchen appliances?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LennStar on November 14, 2019, 10:50:04 AM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh

Is there any other kind of drawer in a fridge?

Are you throwing shade?  Or just unfamiliar with common kitchen appliances?
There are Meat Drawers in a fridge???
Here in Germany we only have vegetables drawers, and surely not because of the lack of meat.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FireHiker on November 14, 2019, 10:56:11 AM
We have a fancy overpriced oversized coffee machine at work — this thing is probably 3 feet tall and likely costs a few thousand dollars. Unfortunately the coffee tastes like watered-down dirt water and sadness :(

The good coffee at work is the one thing I WILL miss...we have a fancy espresso machine with good coffee beans. The current coffee is actually my favorite that I buy at home (Peets).
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: DadJokes on November 14, 2019, 12:00:13 PM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh

Is there any other kind of drawer in a fridge?

Are you throwing shade?  Or just unfamiliar with common kitchen appliances?
There are Meat Drawers in a fridge???
Here in Germany we only have vegetables drawers, and surely not because of the lack of meat.

Every drawer is a meat drawer if your priorities in order.

it was a joke
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on November 14, 2019, 12:46:06 PM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh

Is there any other kind of drawer in a fridge?

Are you throwing shade?  Or just unfamiliar with common kitchen appliances?
There are Meat Drawers in a fridge???
Here in Germany we only have vegetables drawers, and surely not because of the lack of meat.

Every drawer is a meat drawer if your priorities in order.

it was a joke

So was putting my vegetarian meal in a box with dead animal parts.  I get enough of those jokes at work thank you.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on November 14, 2019, 08:57:15 PM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh

Is there any other kind of drawer in a fridge?

Are you throwing shade?  Or just unfamiliar with common kitchen appliances?
There are Meat Drawers in a fridge???
Here in Germany we only have vegetables drawers, and surely not because of the lack of meat.

Every drawer is a meat drawer if your priorities in order.

it was a joke

So was putting my vegetarian meal in a box with dead animal parts.  I get enough of those jokes at work thank you.
I'm allergic to milk and all things made from it like cheese and butter.  Usually work lunches they will get some bbq wings to go with the pizza, but after a particularly rough work week last week they bought just pizza for the team. 

It smelled like sadness to me :-(
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on November 15, 2019, 12:15:43 AM
I've worked here three years.  THREE YEARS and today is the FIRST TIME that they've included a vegetarian option for me in the office wide company lunch.  My petty reason?  Let me quote the company email:

Lunch is here!  It has been put in the refrigerator.  Get it at your leisure.
You will get 1 meal, 1 bag of accessories and 1 CAN of soda.  There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

in the MEAT DRAWER - sheesh

Is there any other kind of drawer in a fridge?

Are you throwing shade?  Or just unfamiliar with common kitchen appliances?
There are Meat Drawers in a fridge???
Here in Germany we only have vegetables drawers, and surely not because of the lack of meat.

Every drawer is a meat drawer if your priorities in order.

it was a joke

So was putting my vegetarian meal in a box with dead animal parts.  I get enough of those jokes at work thank you.

That's a seriously nasty thing to do. Especially if it has been going on for years. Is there anyone at work you can talk to about this? Otherwise I would seriously consider changing jobs. What this is is bullying, plsin and simple, it's not funny at all. If you choose to not eat one type of food that's 100% not anyone else's business and finally ordering lunch that meets your dietary requirements and then putting it in the meat drawer is just mean. It would be hard for me to work with those kind of people. It would always be in the back of my mind while talking to them.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: BussoV6 on November 15, 2019, 03:24:35 AM
One feature we have at work is what I call "Lowest Bidder Coffee".  Essentially, work buys massive amounts of the cheapest coffee available. It's brown, usually has a slight oily sheen to it and on a good day, tastes like licking the outside of a Starbucks cup.

We have a fancy overpriced oversized coffee machine at work — this thing is probably 3 feet tall and likely costs a few thousand dollars. Unfortunately the coffee tastes like watered-down dirt water and sadness :(
I was going to ask what sad work coffee tastes like, but I suppose any coffee from work is sad coffee :-(

Our office is similar. Very fancy expensive machine that uses the cheapest shittest beans they can lay their hands on. Coffee always tastes burnt. I have iced water instead :-(
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on November 15, 2019, 04:57:49 AM
That's a seriously nasty thing to do. Especially if it has been going on for years. Is there anyone at work you can talk to about this? Otherwise I would seriously consider changing jobs. What this is is bullying, plsin and simple, it's not funny at all. If you choose to not eat one type of food that's 100% not anyone else's business and finally ordering lunch that meets your dietary requirements and then putting it in the meat drawer is just mean. It would be hard for me to work with those kind of people. It would always be in the back of my mind while talking to them.
I have a different opinion. It's unlikely that the "Meat" drawer in a workplace is used to store raw meat. It was probably selected because it had nothing in it and it was a way of protecting it from being grabbed by the wrong person. It's just a drawer. Changing jobs over this would be a colossal overreaction. If you choose to be a vegetarian, you must accept that you are outside the norm or you will loose your mind. The rest of the world is cannot be expected to have the same level of awareness of what your dietary choices involve. To expect them to is folly. I interpreted the OP's comment as mildly amusing with a side of wry, not something "mean" to quit your job over.
Signed,
Dicey
30+ year vegetarian
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: AlanStache on November 15, 2019, 06:10:35 AM
That's a seriously nasty thing to do. Especially if it has been going on for years. Is there anyone at work you can talk to about this? Otherwise I would seriously consider changing jobs. What this is is bullying, plsin and simple, it's not funny at all. If you choose to not eat one type of food that's 100% not anyone else's business and finally ordering lunch that meets your dietary requirements and then putting it in the meat drawer is just mean. It would be hard for me to work with those kind of people. It would always be in the back of my mind while talking to them.
I have a different opinion. It's unlikely that the "Meat" drawer in a workplace is used to store raw meat. It was probably selected because it had nothing in it and it was a way of protecting it from being grabbed by the wrong person. It's just a drawer. Changing jobs over this would be a colossal overreaction. If you choose to be a vegetarian, you must accept that you are outside the norm or you will loose your mind. The rest of the world is cannot be expected to have the same level of awareness of what your dietary choices involve. To expect them to is folly. I interpreted the OP's comment as mildly amusing with a side of wry, not something "mean" to quit your job over.
Signed,
Dicey
30+ year vegetarian

In one of the follow ups SheWhoWalksAtLunch said that there was meat in the drawer.  Not sure I would look for a different job over work not ordering lunch within my restrictions in mind but I might look for other signs that I was not valued.  Because every restaurant has some veg option.

re veg jokes: please just dont bother.  anyone who has been vegetarian/etc for more than a month as heard them all, they get old, they were not that funny to start with, you are not that clever.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: SheWhoWalksAtLunch on November 15, 2019, 12:27:49 PM
OP here for the vegetarian lunch in the meat drawer post - Like Dicey, I'm 30+ year vegetarian and am usually very laid back about food choices at work. I ALWAYS pack my own lunch no matter what I'm promised by the person arranging the meal.  I was mostly poking fun at the absurdity of the situation.  It was nice of the company to finally purchase the first vegetarian meal for me in three years.  It was a bummer it didn't happen until Redacted - a man - asked for a vegetarian meal too, but I'm doing my best to look on the bright side.

After snapping at DadJokes comment yesterday (its hard to read tone on the internet and I apologize if your comment really was meant to be innocuous) I went in search of the office person who handled the distribution of lunches. She really was trying to hide the "yummy looking" vegetarian meals by tucking them in the meat drawer out of sight and did do her best to push the initial contents of the drawer to the back out of the way (small company with some home/work overlap in the kitchen sometimes).  Based on the look of horror on her face when I pointed out the incongruity of location choice, I'm confident this wasn't a malicious act on her part.

I've been odd woman out in male dominated industries/token vegetarian/youngest/oldest/oddest employee for too many years to change jobs over this issue.  But back to the intention of this thread, being food shamed at work (even accidentally) is one of my petty reasons for seeking FIRE.  Thank you to everyone who jumped to my defense.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Dicey on November 15, 2019, 03:11:07 PM
I've been odd woman out in male dominated industries/token vegetarian/youngest/oldest/oddest employee for too many years to change jobs over this issue. 
Wait! Are you me? Maybe we're twin daughters of different, yet very similar, mothers, lol!
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Money Badger on November 15, 2019, 07:23:29 PM
Instant Messenger.   The sad reality is that true concentration on mentally challenging work is now “rude” if you don’t react to co-workers more rude, trivial and usually driven by insecurity, instant messages.   

OK, another one...  “Did you see my email?”   🙄
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 16, 2019, 01:51:48 AM
Instant Messenger.   The sad reality is that true concentration on mentally challenging work is now “rude” if you don’t react to co-workers more rude, trivial and usually driven by insecurity, instant messages.   

OK, another one...  “Did you see my email?”   

We have Skype for business, being equally intruding. And Pidgin on our virtual desktop.

It is strange. Most of the people in our department do high concentration work. Still we have been put in an environment where it is impossible to concentrate when many others are present at work.
For me it feel like punishment (torture is too strong a word) to be working in such an environment.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: never give up on November 16, 2019, 05:28:48 AM
I once received an email and Skype message simultaneously from the same person asking if it was ok to call me! :-0
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: frugal_c on November 16, 2019, 06:13:04 AM
Politics.  Not office politics although I hate that too. I can't stand people bringing up politics but yet acting like children if you start to disagree with them.  At least post fire I can just tell people what I think without having to worry about a massive blow up.  Why do people bring up politics if they can't handle hearing arguments on  the other side?
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Money Badger on November 16, 2019, 07:05:42 AM
I once received an email and Skype message simultaneously from the same person asking if it was ok to call me! :-0
[/] ;-)]

Aaaargh!  :-0   Hope you scattered their ashes someplace nice!  ;-)

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Life in Balance on November 16, 2019, 08:02:50 AM
Okay, I know this is really petty, but I will not have to listen to my co-worker's vocal fry in meetings. Like fingernails on a chalkboard.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tyson on November 16, 2019, 09:09:15 AM
Instant Messenger.   The sad reality is that true concentration on mentally challenging work is now “rude” if you don’t react to co-workers more rude, trivial and usually driven by insecurity, instant messages.   

OK, another one...  “Did you see my email?”   🙄

The most hilarious spoof of that exact situation - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mokllJ_Sz_g
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: never give up on November 16, 2019, 09:17:11 AM
I once received an email and Skype message simultaneously from the same person asking if it was ok to call me! :-0

Aaaargh!  :-0   Hope you scattered their ashes someplace nice!  ;-)

I told them I was accepting messages by carrier pigeon only that day.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: cupcakery on November 16, 2019, 10:42:19 AM
I hate having to pretend to take other people seriously and be agreeable.

"Oh, you aren't signing up for the 401k plan, because you can't afford it?  I totally understand.  BTW, how was your vacation last week?"

"No, don't worry about completely screwing up and wasting my time.  It is totally fine.  It happens."

"Oh, you haven't heard of this company policy before?  That is so weird.  Especially since it was mentioned in the handbook that you signed stating that you read and was mentioned in a follow-up email last month.  So odd."

I'd also like to sleep more  and my office is arctic and I hate wearing long johns under my clothes, running a space heater, and wearing fingerless gloves.  I'd cry, but the tears would just freeze on my face.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Schaefer Light on November 16, 2019, 10:55:59 AM
Instant Messenger.   The sad reality is that true concentration on mentally challenging work is now “rude” if you don’t react to co-workers more rude, trivial and usually driven by insecurity, instant messages.   

OK, another one...  “Did you see my email?”   🙄
I hate all forms of IM programs.  Like there weren't enough ways to reach someone already.  The worst is when one person is calling me on my cell phone, another is calling my work phone, another is sending me texts, and yet another is sending me IMs.  Makes me want to throw my computer and cell phone out the window.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Prairie Gal on November 16, 2019, 12:42:08 PM
I hate having to pretend to take other people seriously and be agreeable.

"Oh, you aren't signing up for the 401k plan, because you can't afford it?  I totally understand.  BTW, how was your vacation last week?"

"No, don't worry about completely screwing up and wasting my time.  It is totally fine.  It happens."

"Oh, you haven't heard of this company policy before?  That is so weird.  Especially since it was mentioned in the handbook that you signed stating that you read and was mentioned in a follow-up email last month.  So odd."

I'd also like to sleep more  and my office is arctic and I hate wearing long johns under my clothes, running a space heater, and wearing fingerless gloves.  I'd cry, but the tears would just freeze on my face.

Ha ha! I was just going to post one of my reasons is because they keep the office too hot for me (menopause and all that) and there are people there complaining of being cold and running their space heaters. I have a fan on my desk that helps somewhat. I want to be comfortable and in control of the temperature. One of the reasons I enjoy my work from home days so much.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Exflyboy on November 16, 2019, 03:14:08 PM
When I think about this question long and hard I really only have one reason to seek FIRE..

..... I just don't want people telling me what to do.

Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on November 17, 2019, 06:46:18 AM
I actually love having an IM system.  You can message someone and they can answer 5 or 10 minutes later when they have the time.  It's also not logged or saved, so if you have something to ask about that you don't want in an official email you can do it over IM.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: LateStarter on November 17, 2019, 08:06:20 AM
Email:
There are two vegetarian meals for SheWho and Redacted in the meat drawer.

Shewhowalksatlunch:
Great. My thank-you note is in the fuck-you tray.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Imma on November 17, 2019, 10:36:34 AM
OP here for the vegetarian lunch in the meat drawer post - Like Dicey, I'm 30+ year vegetarian and am usually very laid back about food choices at work. I ALWAYS pack my own lunch no matter what I'm promised by the person arranging the meal.  I was mostly poking fun at the absurdity of the situation.  It was nice of the company to finally purchase the first vegetarian meal for me in three years.  It was a bummer it didn't happen until Redacted - a man - asked for a vegetarian meal too, but I'm doing my best to look on the bright side.

After snapping at DadJokes comment yesterday (its hard to read tone on the internet and I apologize if your comment really was meant to be innocuous) I went in search of the office person who handled the distribution of lunches. She really was trying to hide the "yummy looking" vegetarian meals by tucking them in the meat drawer out of sight and did do her best to push the initial contents of the drawer to the back out of the way (small company with some home/work overlap in the kitchen sometimes).  Based on the look of horror on her face when I pointed out the incongruity of location choice, I'm confident this wasn't a malicious act on her part.

I've been odd woman out in male dominated industries/token vegetarian/youngest/oldest/oddest employee for too many years to change jobs over this issue.  But back to the intention of this thread, being food shamed at work (even accidentally) is one of my petty reasons for seeking FIRE.  Thank you to everyone who jumped to my defense.

It's good to hear you've cleared up the situation with the lady who put the food there. Obviously not a malicious act from her.
y
What I was getting at wasn't really the location of the vegetarian meals (if that's a one off) but the fact that they've ordered the wrong type of food for you for 3 years until now. That just sounds crazy. I can understand that happening the first time lunch is ordered when you start working somewhere, but assuming you told them the first time you're actually vegetarian, I still can't understand the thought process of the person ordering the meals all those years. I'm also the odd woman out in a conservative, male dominated industry, but we're in the 21st century. Being a vegetarian is very common and any catering company offers vegetarian options. I'm not formally a vegetarian but I politely requested vegetarian lunches because I rarely eat meat, and no one batted an eyelid even though that's unusual in my company. I've been in charge of ordering lunches and with most catering companies, ordering a vegetarian option is just a matter of ticking a box. I would be absolultely mortified if I ordered a lunch and forgot about someone's dietary requirements.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: FIRE 20/20 on November 17, 2019, 03:38:29 PM
I actually love having an IM system.  You can message someone and they can answer 5 or 10 minutes later when they have the time.  It's also not logged or saved, so if you have something to ask about that you don't want in an official email you can do it over IM.

Are you sure it isn't logged?  It definitely was where I used to work.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Zaga on November 17, 2019, 04:05:16 PM
I actually love having an IM system.  You can message someone and they can answer 5 or 10 minutes later when they have the time.  It's also not logged or saved, so if you have something to ask about that you don't want in an official email you can do it over IM.

Are you sure it isn't logged?  It definitely was where I used to work.
That's a matter of individual company policy, I know it isn't where I work. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 18, 2019, 12:33:47 AM
Don't remember whether I wrote this before, but today is another such day. If the weather is not suited for commuting, I don't want to have to drive to work, together with lots of other cars at the same time.

Today it is snowing, but with a temperature above 0 C, which gives very slippery roads. And despite driving a 4x4 with winter tires very slowly, the car glanced over the road some place. It went well luckily. But if I wouldn't have to work, I wouldn't have been driving at such a busy time.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Tabitha on November 19, 2019, 11:50:05 PM
.
with most catering companies, ordering a vegetarian option is just a matter of ticking a box. I would be absolultely mortified if I ordered a lunch and forgot about someone's dietary requirements.

My team attended an off site 2 day meeting. Dietary restrictions were duly sent ahead.  I have one guy who eats GF-halal. This takes awareness but is not objectively difficult. At the 10 am break I get told by the other company’s rep that the caterer can’t accommodate GF-halal.  WTAF.  He made a meal of the salad but I was pissed and embarrassed. The caterer should have been.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Rankin on November 20, 2019, 06:34:01 AM
I love video games, and one of the things on my bucket list is to “whale” (buy pay-to-win microtransactions and/or virtual currency and in-game items) in an mmorpg and become the #1 player. I’d likely use my discretionary post-FIRE spending money on this until I get bored of it.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ATS on November 20, 2019, 03:09:15 PM
We are transitioning from individual cubicles and offices to an open layout plan.  It's a way to cram 20-30 people in the same space that used to hold 10 people.  You have a small locker for your coat and two file drawers for any other items at your tiny little desk.  Nothing like sitting shoulder to shoulder with your coworkers with no privacy.

Thankfully I will be gone before my floor transitions to the new layout.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Channel-Z on November 20, 2019, 07:44:44 PM
We're getting smaller desks too, without any dividers, and smaller file cabinets.

About a month ago I.T. told us to change our passwords to sync our old email account with the new email server. Migration happened today, and about 80% of the staff didn't follow that basic instruction, which left them high and dry. I'm not in I.T. at all and I spent part of the day trying to guide people through the setup of their email accounts.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: Linea_Norway on November 20, 2019, 10:46:30 PM
We also have a smallish desk and only a small drawer block per person. Nothing more. The desk is sit/standup, which is good. No private wardrobe for coats.

I think the reason they are able to do this is is that it might be difficult to measure productivity and therefore the concequences are invisible. I have become terribly unproductive, because I can't concentrate and I am probably not the only one.

From Monday only 3 weeks left....
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: techwiz on November 21, 2019, 07:51:45 AM
We also have a smallish desk and only a small drawer block per person. Nothing more. The desk is sit/standup, which is good. No private wardrobe for coats.

I think the reason they are able to do this is is that it might be difficult to measure productivity and therefore the concequences are invisible. I have become terribly unproductive, because I can't concentrate and I am probably not the only one.

From Monday only 3 weeks left....

Seems many companies are going with this approach (real reason is to save money on office space). Our accommodations people are selling it, saying how great it is. 

"No assigned seating employees have the option to use a variety of work points (desks; sofas; collaboration pods; lunch room, etc.).
Employees have access to a web-based reservation system for some work points. Employees have a locker. Access to Collaborative spaces and collaboration areas. Strong focus on collaboration tools (instant messaging; desktop video conferencing; collab tools)"

Everyone is suppose to move to this type of setup. I think our group is still a year or more away from being transitioned. Everyone I have talked to said they like it ,but when I question them further I find out they work from home most of the time. If everyone came in there would not be enough space. The logic for efficient use of space makes sense, but some type of work just doesn't fit this model.

 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: ATS on November 21, 2019, 08:42:28 AM
We also have a smallish desk and only a small drawer block per person. Nothing more. The desk is sit/standup, which is good. No private wardrobe for coats.

I think the reason they are able to do this is is that it might be difficult to measure productivity and therefore the concequences are invisible. I have become terribly unproductive, because I can't concentrate and I am probably not the only one.

From Monday only 3 weeks left....

Seems many companies are going with this approach (real reason is to save money on office space). Our accommodations people are selling it, saying how great it is. 

"No assigned seating employees have the option to use a variety of work points (desks; sofas; collaboration pods; lunch room, etc.).
Employees have access to a web-based reservation system for some work points. Employees have a locker. Access to Collaborative spaces and collaboration areas. Strong focus on collaboration tools (instant messaging; desktop video conferencing; collab tools)"

Everyone is suppose to move to this type of setup. I think our group is still a year or more away from being transitioned. Everyone I have talked to said they like it ,but when I question them further I find out they work from home most of the time. If everyone came in there would not be enough space. The logic for efficient use of space makes sense, but some type of work just doesn't fit this model.

One of the floors in my building has the no assigned seating model and a bank of small conference rooms if people need privacy for a meeting or a call.  What actually happens is the first people there in the morning grab the conference rooms and camp there all day and if you need some privacy for a phone call or a meeting there isn't anywhere to go. 

My department will have assigned seating, but the thought of sitting in an open area with four colleagues within 20 feet of me makes me glad I won't have to be dealing with this.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: zolotiyeruki on November 21, 2019, 09:14:46 AM
My petty reason for today:  fluorescent lights in wintertime are not pleasant.  I'd rather sit in a dark office than have that awful lighting on.
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: dougules on November 21, 2019, 10:06:57 AM
.
with most catering companies, ordering a vegetarian option is just a matter of ticking a box. I would be absolultely mortified if I ordered a lunch and forgot about someone's dietary requirements.

My team attended an off site 2 day meeting. Dietary restrictions were duly sent ahead.  I have one guy who eats GF-halal. This takes awareness but is not objectively difficult. At the 10 am break I get told by the other company’s rep that the caterer can’t accommodate GF-halal.  WTAF.  He made a meal of the salad but I was pissed and embarrassed. The caterer should have been.

Even if they didn't have halal meat, isn't vegetarian halal?  GF vegetarian isn't a big request. 
Title: Re: What is your most petty reason for seeking FIRE?
Post by: middo on November 21, 2019, 03:39:31 PM
We also have a smallish desk and only a small drawer block per person. Nothing more. The desk is sit/standup, which is good. No private wardrobe for coats.

I think the reason they are able to do this is is that it might be difficult to measure productivity and therefore the concequences are invisible. I have become terribly unproductive, because I can't concentrate and I am probably not the only one.

From Monday only 3 weeks left....

Seems many companies are going with this approach (real reason is to save money on office space). Our accommodations people are selling it, saying how great it is. 

"No assigned seating employees have the option to use a variety of work points (desks; sofas; collaboration pods; lunch room, etc.).
Employees have access to a web-based reservation system for some work points. Employees have a locker. Access to Collaborative spaces and collaboration areas. Strong focus on collaboration tools (instant messaging; desktop video conferencing; collab tools)"

Everyone is suppose to move to this type of setup. I think our group is still a year or more away from being transitioned. Everyone I have talked to said they like it ,but when I question them further I find out they work from home most of the time. If everyone came in there would not be enough space. The logic for efficient use of space makes sense, but some type of work just doesn't fit this model.

One of the floors in my building has the no assigned seating model and a bank of small conference rooms if people need privacy for a meeting or a call.  What actually happens is the first people there in the morning grab the conference rooms and camp there all day and if you need some privacy for a phone call or a meeting there isn't anywhere to go. 

My department will have assigned seating, but the thought of sitting in an open area with four colleagues within 20 feet of me makes me glad I won't have to be dealing with this.

We have this exact same issue with the conference rooms.  No set desk, so people grab a room early.  We also have only a limited number of phones, which are in the conference rooms.  All calls out are expected to be via these phones, and all calls in go straight to our message bank.  As one other teacher asked, "If another school has the same system, how can I ever speak to a teacher there?"