I think it's true that most people assume you're "like them", unless they have reason to believe otherwise. When I started dating my husband, I assumed his salary was close to mine since we were both in IT, it was a shock to find out he made 1/2 what I do, and that pattern has held over the last 20 years.
I'm assuming we're "out", because we're in the process of having our dream retirement home built. But, unless you've built a house, you probably don't know what it costs. And until they see the house, they won't realize. And unless people have "done the math", they won't guess how much we have in retirement accounts. My brother has a generous defined benefit pension, so it is doubtful he's done the math of how much I need to fund a 40-45 year retirement.
I don't tell people what I make, some will have a rough idea, if they're in the industry. But I assume most folks assume I'm in the 100K range, not well north of 200K (this is new, ....and we don't spend like we have a combined income approaching $350K....my car is 16 years old, his is 13, our motorcycles are both 17 years old. We don't enjoy going south for a week in the winter, so we don't. Most of our vacations involve a m/c trip and we stay in places with kitchenettes because that what we like.
What I don't understand is all my american friends that bemoan that they can't afford to retire. I don't understand that, they're making at least what I am, what are they spending their money on? Oh yeah, new BMWs and winery memberships and eating out, alot......they always point to the cost of healthcare, but wouldn't that just be a line item in the budget? Budget 15K a year until you hit 67.