Slapping Kate Perry

[Latwell]

I want to slap her for these awful lyrics..

"This one goes out to the ladies at breakfast in last night's dress
(It's how we do, straight stuntin' like that)
Uh-huh, I see you
Yo, this goes out to all you kids that still have their cars at the club valet and it's Tuesday
(This is how we do yeah straight stuntin' like that)
Yo, shout out to all you kids, buying bottle service, with your rent money
Respect"


No, Ms. Perry... there is no respect for people wasting their rent on bottle service.
*Smack forehead*

[sheepstache]

I know, everytime I hear Niki Minaj sing "And I ain't payin' my rent this month / I owe that" I'm like, dammit, why does my mustachianism prevent me from enjoying the good things in life?  Like joining in when everyone says ray ray ray, spendin' all our money cuz today's pay day.

I'm just barely restraining myself from making a comment about how my bank balance is higher than a motherfucker--and nope, failed, didn't restrain myself.

[ecmcn]

Did anyone else have to Google "bottle service"? I was thinking it was something like getting Domino's to bring a fifth of vodka with your pizza. I only thought bartenders left the whole bottle in cowboy movies.

[LifesABeach]

Did anyone else have to Google "bottle service"? I was thinking it was something like getting Domino's to bring a fifth of vodka with your pizza. I only thought bartenders left the whole bottle in cowboy movies.

I actually knew what bottle service was due to having a former roommate that thought a $4000 bar tab during a trip to Las Vegas was a point to be proud of.  If it weren't for that one specific occasion, I'd be right there with you.

[Roland of Gilead]

For some reason I think more about power boating than slapping when I see Katy Perry.

[Grid]

I know, everytime I hear Niki Minaj sing "And I ain't payin' my rent this month / I owe that" I'm like, dammit, why does my mustachianism prevent me from enjoying the good things in life?  Like joining in when everyone says ray ray ray, spendin' all our money cuz today's pay day.

I'm just barely restraining myself from making a comment about how my bank balance is higher than a motherfucker--and nope, failed, didn't restrain myself.

Lol!  I enjoy Nicki Minaj's "Starships" but have always cringed at the same line.  Pay your damn landlord, Ms. Minaj.  It just so happens (I only know this because I just caught it at the end of the video.) that she's associated with "Cash Money Records", as opposed to "Beat Inflation Records" or possibly "Invest for the Long Term Records".  Ha.

[J Boogie]

This is Bobby Bottleservice aka... Bobby Bottleservice

[N]

lol.
thought the same exact thing when I heard that song!

[Tetsuya Hondo]

Simple solution: don't listen to Katy Perry.

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

[Record Store Guy enjoys the wave of smugness rushing through his body and cues up another proto Kraut dancepunk polka single performed by obscure Japanese girl noise band from Korea. Wonders if he's listen to it to be ironic or for it's own sake and decides that he just doesn't know anymore.]

[Beric01]

Did anyone else have to Google "bottle service"? I was thinking it was something like getting Domino's to bring a fifth of vodka with your pizza. I only thought bartenders left the whole bottle in cowboy movies.

I actually knew what bottle service was due to having a former roommate that thought a $4000 bar tab during a trip to Las Vegas was a point to be proud of.  If it weren't for that one specific occasion, I'd be right there with you.

Same here, only I had a college classmate that had a friend that ran a 21K bar tab for him, with a private room. And apparently he charged it all on with an American Express Black card (which I also only heard of due to him).

Wait, are we proud of knowing someone who was so wasteful? :P

[Paul der Krake]

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

It's kind of like fast food: everybody knows how shit it is, but it's there to be picked up for cheap and easily consumed.

Music died of AIDS on a cold November evening in 1991. :(

[Beric01]

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

It's kind of like fast food: everybody knows how shit it is, but it's there to be picked up for cheap and easily consumed.

Music died of AIDS on a cold November evening in 1991. :(

Music died in the early 20th century.


(Sorry, a classical/romantic period music lover here - they don't make it like they used to).

[Daley]

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

It's kind of like fast food: everybody knows how shit it is, but it's there to be picked up for cheap and easily consumed.

Music died of AIDS on a cold November evening in 1991. :(

Music died in the early 20th century.


(Sorry, a classical/romantic period music lover here - they don't make it like they used to).

Bollocks! It died in the early 19th century! *shakes fist like a deaf composer*

[Beric01]

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

It's kind of like fast food: everybody knows how shit it is, but it's there to be picked up for cheap and easily consumed.

Music died of AIDS on a cold November evening in 1991. :(

Music died in the early 20th century.


(Sorry, a classical/romantic period music lover here - they don't make it like they used to).

Bollocks! It died in the early 19th century! *shakes fist like a deaf composer*

My Dad would agree - he doesn't even like the Romantic period - only likes Tchaikovsky's early symphonies, and believes Beethoven was the pinnacle of music. He says modern music often lacks a theme(often it's just sounds with no musical conclusion) and has too much dissonance - to which I would generally agree.

[Russ]

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

It's kind of like fast food: everybody knows how shit it is, but it's there to be picked up for cheap and easily consumed.

Music died of AIDS on a cold November evening in 1991. :(

Music died in the early 20th century.


(Sorry, a classical/romantic period music lover here - they don't make it like they used to).

Bollocks! It died in the early 19th century! *shakes fist like a deaf composer*

no, music died with the Celtic harp in the mid-1700's

[EscapeVelocity2020]

(warning - similar response to previous, overly nested posts)

Bollocks! It died in the early 19th century! *shakes fist like a deaf composer*

Nicely done IP, my 70 y.o., retirement-expert Dad agrees (total classical junkie).  If it agitates you, irritates you, or otherwise annoys - turn it off. 

[Daley]

I'm just gonna remind you that all music was once new.

*fires up Baby Got Back*

[Constance Noring]

I'm just gonna remind you that all music was once new.

*fires up Baby Got Back*

*extends a classy pinkie* Quite.

[LibrarIan]

Anyone come here hoping to see a video of the OP slapping Katy Perry? I am disappointed.

You have to wonder if the corporate suits who control mainstream music are putting these lyrics into the mouths of "artists" like Minaj and Perry on purpose to keep us all wanting to mindlessly consume.

Wait...

[matchewed]

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

It's kind of like fast food: everybody knows how shit it is, but it's there to be picked up for cheap and easily consumed.

Music died of AIDS on a cold November evening in 1991. :(

Music died in the early 20th century.


(Sorry, a classical/romantic period music lover here - they don't make it like they used to).

Bollocks! It died in the early 19th century! *shakes fist like a deaf composer*

no, music died with the Celtic harp in the mid-1700's

Music died when the pan flute was given up in the "whenever it was given up's".

[AlanStache]

Anyone come here hoping to see a video of the OP slapping Katy Perry? I am disappointed.

You have to wonder if the corporate suits who control mainstream music are putting these lyrics into the mouths of "artists" like Minaj and Perry on purpose to keep us all wanting to mindlessly consume.

Wait...

Not sure how much I can buy into some global illuminati conspiracy, seems much easier that the record companies are just stubbing along like everyone else.  I mean these people did (have/are?) a policy of sewing there customers to make money rather than innovating and adapting to a changing market.

And I tell those kids playing on my lawn that anything not between per-neo-dubstep and 'Cool and the Gang' is just noise.  :-)

[hybrid]

Anyone come here hoping to see a video of the OP slapping Katy Perry? I am disappointed.

No, I just figured "Slapping Katy Perry" was slang for (fill in whatever obscene act first comes to your dirty little mind)

[fallstoclimb]

This is Bobby Bottleservice aka... Bobby Bottleservice

Ha.

[dragoncar]

For some reason I think more about power boating than slapping when I see Katy Perry.

I thought you wrote "motorboating" and I almost died

I'm pretty sure that's the intended word. 

[ecmcn]

Maybe we're being overly harsh on Katy:

http://www.hipguide.com/ask_the_hip/index.cgi?item=1147206437

people get stuck on the amount and don’t do the math. At $15-20 a mixed drink, it only takes a few before your tab is close to what it would be for a bottle.

So it's actually like shopping at Costco, if Costco had gold-plated shopping carts.

(although note that "few x $15-20" doesn't approach the quoted $300 Grey Goose bottle, but then again this math was from someone intimately familiar with bottle service)

Eric

[ketchup]

Did anyone else have to Google "bottle service"? I was thinking it was something like getting Domino's to bring a fifth of vodka with your pizza. I only thought bartenders left the whole bottle in cowboy movies.

Me too, I had no clue what that meant, only a presumed association with alcohol.

I prefer "I got 600 dollars In the bank, Mothafucka"

[Malaysia41]

Anyone consider these may be ironic lyrics?  Okay, yeah, prolly not.

[dcheesi]

Maybe we're being overly harsh on Katy:

http://www.hipguide.com/ask_the_hip/index.cgi?item=1147206437

people get stuck on the amount and don’t do the math. At $15-20 a mixed drink, it only takes a few before your tab is close to what it would be for a bottle.

So it's actually like shopping at Costco, if Costco had gold-plated shopping carts.

(although note that "few x $15-20" doesn't approach the quoted $300 Grey Goose bottle, but then again this math was from someone intimately familiar with bottle service)

Eric

A few per person. $20 * 4 drinks * 4 people = $320 for 16 drinks, which is about the same amount of alcohol you'd get out of one bottle of liquor.

[ecmcn]

Thanks dcheesi, I stand corrected. Who's up for a trip to Vegas?!

[eyePod]

Moments like these make me appreciate the fact that I don't listen to the radio.

[AllChoptUp]

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

It's kind of like fast food: everybody knows how shit it is, but it's there to be picked up for cheap and easily consumed.

Music died of AIDS on a cold November evening in 1991. :(

Word

[4alpacas]

Maybe we're being overly harsh on Katy:

http://www.hipguide.com/ask_the_hip/index.cgi?item=1147206437

people get stuck on the amount and don’t do the math. At $15-20 a mixed drink, it only takes a few before your tab is close to what it would be for a bottle.

So it's actually like shopping at Costco, if Costco had gold-plated shopping carts.

(although note that "few x $15-20" doesn't approach the quoted $300 Grey Goose bottle, but then again this math was from someone intimately familiar with bottle service)

Eric

A few per person. $20 * 4 drinks * 4 people = $320 for 16 drinks, which is about the same amount of alcohol you'd get out of one bottle of liquor.

Maybe I'm too old.  Thinking about drinking 4 drinks makes me sleepy.

[sheepstache]

Okay but on the earworm front, shall we give a shout-out to Lorde?  Nothing frugal in the message but at least a criticism of the hyper spendy one.

But every song's like gold teeth, grey goose, trippin' in the bathroom
Blood stains, ball gowns, trashin' the hotel room,
We don't care, we're driving Cadillacs in our dreams.
But everybody's like Cristal, Maybach, diamonds on your timepiece.
Jet planes, islands, tigers on a gold leash.
We don't care, we aren't caught up in your love affair.

I prefer "I got 600 dollars In the bank, Mothafucka"

Hahaha!

I cant afford a car I use public transportation
I don't mind I read 'til I reach my destination
Sometimes a newspaper, sometimes a book
The amount of money I save this shit is off the hook

[Michael792]

Did anyone else have to Google "bottle service"? I was thinking it was something like getting Domino's to bring a fifth of vodka with your pizza. I only thought bartenders left the whole bottle in cowboy movies.

Me too, I had no clue what that meant, only a presumed association with alcohol.

I prefer "I got 600 dollars In the bank, Mothafucka"

Pretty sure I just found a new favorite artist.

[MicroRN]

Time for some Macklemore...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QK8mJJJvaes

[CheapskateWife]

I was "Goodwill"ing long before Macklemore made it cool, but thanks to him, now my kids don't give me nearly as many eye rolls about it :D

[Latwell]

Simple solution: don't listen to Katy Perry.

Seriously, in this age of nearly unlimited freely available music, why waste your time with mass-produced corporate crap?

[Record Store Guy enjoys the wave of smugness rushing through his body and cues up another proto Kraut dancepunk polka single performed by obscure Japanese girl noise band from Korea. Wonders if he's listen to it to be ironic or for it's own sake and decides that he just doesn't know anymore.]

Honestly, someone else was listening to the "top hits" of America at work. I was just happy to have some noise in the background.. Until perry showed up

[stlbrah]

some stds and lost brain cells in exchange for spending hundreds of dollars you don't have... sounds like a fair trade

[MoneyCat]

Bottle service is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of.  Only chumps even have to pay for drinks in Vegas (or pay for anything else there).  I have been gaming the Social Rewards program for a year now and I racked up so many reward credits for Total Rewards casinos that I never have to pay for anything.  They just hand these comps away for free.  I have no idea why everyone going to Vegas doesn't just join this program.  It's a no brainer.  Here's the link for it: bit.ly/1bCaKs6

[RootofGood]

I was "Goodwill"ing long before Macklemore made it cool, but thanks to him, now my kids don't give me nearly as many eye rolls about it :D

This.  As soon as my kids hear me singing "I got $20 in my pocket", they know it's time to hit up the clearance racks at the thrift shop.  Oh yeah. 

[AlanStache]

Bottle service is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of.  Only chumps even have to pay for drinks in Vegas (or pay for anything else there).  I have been gaming the Social Rewards program for a year now and I racked up so many reward credits for Total Rewards casinos that I never have to pay for anything.  They just hand these comps away for free.  I have no idea why everyone going to Vegas doesn't just join this program.  It's a no brainer.  Here's the link for it: bit.ly/1bCaKs6

??? how many hours you have to put in at the black jack table to get something?  No, am going to Vegas in a few months, been there lots and never really gamble (50$ per trip to be social with customers*) and never really tried to get the "free" drinks or looked into the rewards programs.

*And F-off I could probably nearly expense 50$ if I worded it correctly :-p  spending money to make money.

[MoneyCat]

Bottle service is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of.  Only chumps even have to pay for drinks in Vegas (or pay for anything else there).  I have been gaming the Social Rewards program for a year now and I racked up so many reward credits for Total Rewards casinos that I never have to pay for anything.  They just hand these comps away for free.  I have no idea why everyone going to Vegas doesn't just join this program.  It's a no brainer.  Here's the link for it: bit.ly/1bCaKs6

??? how many hours you have to put in at the black jack table to get something?  No, am going to Vegas in a few months, been there lots and never really gamble (50$ per trip to be social with customers*) and never really tried to get the "free" drinks or looked into the rewards programs.

*And F-off I could probably nearly expense 50$ if I worded it correctly :-p  spending money to make money.

I don't spend any money gambling (That's anti-Mustachian).  I just have free vacations to casino resorts because I game their reward programs.  I actually wrote a thread on it a while back: Here's the link for it: http://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/share-your-badassity/how-i-got-a-nearly-free-vacation/.  The only thing that has changed since I wrote that original thread post is that now the bonus reward (in addition to $100 in reward credits) for signing up for the Total Rewards Visa is no longer a free Buffet of Buffets pass for two (which was pretty nice, because you got to eat at buffets for 24 hours for free).  Now they've changed that to your choice of a free ride for two on the High Roller observation wheel at the Linq in Vegas (which is the world's tallest observation wheel, so that's still a nice deal) or a free one night hotel stay in Atlantic City.

I'm actually about to take another vacation in November because I use these programs.  I'm pretty sure this isn't what the casinos want people to do, but that's not really my problem.