I would think the woman giving birth gets the one and only vote on that matter.
+1
I had my mother and my husband present at my children's birth. To everyone their own but I never understood why a mother to be would not want her parents or even grand parents around. I don't think they necessarily need to be in the room but having that support at home for new parents can be invaluable. My mom was so helpful that she would get up in the middle of the night to help with the baby. She raised 7 healthy and successful children so I definitely found her advice and help during that time of life to be invaluable. I don't agree that only what the mother wants matters. Shouldn't the desires and feelings of the grand parents matter? After all, they are probably just as excited to see the new baby and spend time with the baby. My children are still young but I imagine that I will be really hurt if I wanted to help any one of my daughters after they gave birth and they refused. Frankly, I would consider this inconsiderate and selfish.
Super cool that your parents were helpful. When I have kids, I hope my parents will be helpful (although I'd *never* invite to the birthing room).
Reasons that even I (not a parent) can think why someone wouldn't want their parents there:
1. The house is small and does not have space for the grandparents so everyone is tripping over everyone
2. The grandparents do not help
3. Even worse, the grandparents cause work (wanting to be fed, waited on etc)
4. The parents want the first week to themselves, since it's crazy stressful/new etc (and perhaps the grandparents are too much on the holding the baby and taking that time from mom & dad)
5. The grandparents want to be in the delivery room and the mom doesn't want to show her privates/birthing stress/more people in the room/worries about medical complications etc
6. The grandparents criticize the new parents, telling them all the ways they should do things (which may not even be doctor recommended methods these days)
7. The grandparents may overshare per the story above (omg)
So no, no, no, NO, it is not inconsiderate for new parents to choose not to invite the parents. The grandparents had their chance to set the rules with their kids, their wishes are not as significant as the new mom's wishes here (and the new dad's as well). If you want to be invited to the birth of your grandkid, best suggestion is to try to demonstrate well in advance of the birth how you would be a help, not a hindrance, but don't get mad if they choose otherwise.