I had kind of a work-related meltdown just a couple days ago when talking to my DH. I don't get the recognition I deserve, no raises, yadda yadda yadda. He was really kind and understanding, and because he is in grad school to become a marriage and family therapist, he shared an idea with me that I think might resonate with others, so here goes.
DH offered me this way of thinking about FIRE as a kind of divorce from my job. Typically, when men decide to get divorced, the divorce is done and wrapped within 1-2 years. When women decide to get divorced, the actual divorce might not happen for another 5 to 15 years. The reasons should be obvious, but just in case not... there's generally less for men to lose in a divorce so it can happen quickly, and women need to start planning much earlier in order to make their getaway, so to speak. They might go back to school and complete a degree, start a new career or their own business, etc. in that time period, all the while, knowing they are getting divorced eventually. When they finally tell their husband they want a divorce, they have already been laying the groundwork for many years. So DH said I am like the woman preparing for a divorce from my job. I already know when I want to quit, how much I want to have saved, etc. I just haven't informed my employer of this impending divorce. I will likely quit before many of my older colleagues even start thinking about retirement (most are 5-10 years older than I am and make $10k+ more per year than I do).
For some reason, I find this idea really freeing, probably like women who decide to get divorces from their spouses. :) Thoughts? Other ways to think about retirement, quitting a job, FIRE, etc.?