Re: where is sol?

[sol]

I skimmed over this thread but it looks like it quickly went OT, like all good mustache forum threads.

So hey there forum peeps!  I've been off the MMM forums for a while, but have been receiving semi-regular PMs from some of you inquiring as to my whereabouts.  I'm still alive! 

And I'm checking in just to say as much, but I'm not planning to stick around.  The forum has changed so much over the years that it just doesn't fit me very well anymore.  This community has grown so much, and has had to incorporate so many new and diverse voices, that it no longer serves the purpose for which it was created and which drew me here in the first place from ERE.  Fortunately, the internet is a BIG place with lots of room for everyone to say their piece, without those pieces ever having to get too close to each other. 

I can take my one little voice to other dark corners.  This one is too noisy for me, but that doesn't mean it can't be perfect for someone else.

My partner and I are still retired, and I'm still grateful for all of the financial guidance and advice I received here over the years.  We sold one of our rental houses, and took up some new outdoor hobbies together.  The time that I formerly spent here, talking to all of you, is now most often spent at home with my kids or out and about playing with that "IRL" world.  I have an ever-changing list of volunteer and/or charity gigs that keep me as busy as I can comfortably tolerate.  I am practicing being a better parent and husband, I read more books, I get more exercise, and I'm generally a happier person than I was back when the forum was a bigger part of my life.  Sometimes I miss the entertaining conversations that a few of you provided me over the years, but like I said the internet is a big place and ya'll aren't the only smart people around.

Once upon a time, I mentioned on the forum that I didn't really realize how much of my time and attention had been consumed by my 9-5 until I gave up my 9-5, and suddenly everything else in my life just kind of started to fall into place when those things started getting the attention they really deserved, after retirement.  In a similar fashion but perhaps to a smaller degree, giving up the MMM forums also cleared off another huge chunk of my mental counterspace.  Other areas of my life magically improved when I curtailed my internet usage.  I highly recommend trying it out.

Retirement has only continued to get better the longer I practice it.  These days, I struggle to understand how I survived the professional world for as long as I did. 

You can still reach me via PM, but I can't write back unless you send me some other form of contact info.  Like an alcoholic, I'm aiming for a zero-tolerance rule for MMM forum use every day.  Today is a failure, obviously, but to everyone who's written to say hi over the past ~6 months I wanted to say that yes, life goes on and it's still amazing.

[bacchi]

Good to hear you're doing well, Sol.

[wenchsenior]

I'm glad to hear things are going well!

[John Galt incarnate!]

I'm glad to hear things are going well!

+1

 I miss sol.

[Buffaloski Boris]

Hey Sol. Glad to see you post again. You departed about the time I started getting active. I hope it wasn’t my deodorant? 😆

The  “where is Sol?” thread during the summer was glorious. One of my favorites in retrospect. It completely went off the rails, ran in the ditch, dug up trees, and finally got shut down by the mods. Like I say, glorious. Sorry you weren’t there for it.

Like you say the internet is a big place. Internet communities change over time and this one is no different. As FIRE becomes more mainstream, it’s going to change. People are going to reshape it. I skimmed over “Your money or your life” and noted how different it was from what people are talking about now.

Welcome back for now. Hope you’ll get in the scrum every now and then in the future but I completely get that this can be a time suck.

[partgypsy]

I'm glad you stopped by to say hi and that you are alive : )
I'm glad you are in a good place.
And I get it, about limiting or even cold turkeying most of the internet. Sometimes I use this site too much, both to air my thoughts and also see what everyone else is up to and what they think, when when I'm bored, restless whatever. I scaled back my Facebook usage and feel better about that.

Onward and upward!

[G-dog]

Thanks for the update - glad everything is going so well. 

If you don’t mind sharing (PM if you prefer), what Internet spots do hold your interest now?

[Goldielocks]

Hi Sol,  Thanks for the update.   I hear you about the changes... some of them I like, and I have gravitated to a few of the journals for about 90% of my time here now.   An occassional dabble in the case studies to tell someone that they can do it or to tell them they are an idiot (in a nice way, with lots of numbers, of course!).

I do miss the dry humour that used to pervail...  :-)

If you get a chance, can you recommend a few internet spots that may be of interest to those of us with similar mindsets?   I don't need platitudes about finances, I need some kickass.

[nereo]

So hey there forum peeps!  I've been off the MMM forums for a while, but have been receiving semi-regular PMs from some of you inquiring as to my whereabouts.  I'm still alive! 

Yay!!

And I'm checking in just to say as much, but I'm not planning to stick around.

Booooooo!!!!

 The time that I formerly spent here, talking to all of you, is now most often spent at home with my kids or out and about playing with that "IRL" world.  I have an ever-changing list of volunteer and/or charity gigs that keep me as busy as I can comfortably tolerate.  I am practicing being a better parent and husband, I read more books, I get more exercise, and I'm generally a happier person than I was back when the forum was a bigger part of my life. 

yeah, ok... admittedly those are good reasons.

I miss you Sol - always liked reading your commentary.   Glad to know you are doing well. 

[EscapeVelocity2020]

Good to hear from you Sol, glad to hear you are doing well, and good for you on directing your life toward the things that make you happiest.  I'm a firm believer in the idea that people are not very good at knowing what will make them happiest in the long run.

I do miss your insights on politics, but my 'Let's Speculate on a Trump Presidency' thread got the kibosh long ago.  Would love to know if you have a forum you'd recommend for stuff like that, especially one where you participate...  Politics are not my thing, but are having a big influence on many areas of my life (taxes, investments, industry...).

Either way, happy holidays and thanks for the update!

[arebelspy]

Glad you're doing well and enjoying the ER. Appreciate the update.

We'll miss your voice. Hope to see you again at an IRL meetup sometime.

[Dancin'Dog]

Sol,


It's good to hear that you're doing well.  Happy holidays & beyond.


Peace,
GE

[Paul der Krake]

The time that I formerly spent here, talking to all of you, is now most often spent at home with my kids or out and about playing with that "IRL" world.  I have an ever-changing list of volunteer and/or charity gigs that keep me as busy as I can comfortably tolerate.  I am practicing being a better parent and husband, I read more books, I get more exercise, and I'm generally a happier person than I was back when the forum was a bigger part of my life.  Sometimes I miss the entertaining conversations that a few of you provided me over the years, but like I said the internet is a big place and ya'll aren't the only smart people around.

Wow, so you'd rather spend time with the real life needies than the internet elite?

This slight will not be forgotten.

[ysette9]

Glad to hear you are doing well, @Sol. I appreciate the update as I had been wondering the other day ago how you were doing.

Enjoy the real world. I need to work in that myself.

[fuzzy math]

This is one instance where I would personally advocate for falling off the wagon and mainlining that shit. Good to see you! The forums aren't quite the same without your presence

[jeninco]

Glad to hear that you're still out there and doing well!

Sorry to hear that I won't get to read more of your thoughts here, but it sounds like you are making a decision that results in extra happiness for you and your family. Best wishes!

[BuildingFrugalHabits]

Thanks for checking in!  I don't post much but I do miss reading your "wall of text" posts that would appear from time to time.  It's totally valid to channel your energy into something more tangible but I hope you drop us a line here or there as time allows.   

[okits]

You've been a great part of this community, sol.  I heartily wish you and your family well and will miss your contributions around here.

[norajean]

That is terrific that your wife finally retired and is no longer working at her job. You all must be enjoying the free time a lot.

[DaMa]

Nice to know things are going well.  I certainly miss your posts. 

[Dicey]

Add me to the list of old-timers who miss your voice, Sol. I am thrilled that you came back for an update and hope you'll do it again one of these days. Until then, I hope life continues to treat you well.

[frugalnacho]

[Secret Stache]

Oh my, lol.  I went back to that old thread that starts with the innocent question of "Where's Sol?" and I wanted to see how off the rails it got and jumped to page 5 that starts with a retort "Bush did commit war crimes."  That made me laugh, thanks for that Sol.

[Telecaster]

Sol was one of the posters I looked forward to reading the most.  He will be missed. 

[mm1970]

I, for one, will miss your voice.

I'm glad you are doing so well.  I get a glimpse of how retired life could fall into place each time I take a vacation.  Most recently, to a cabin with no cell service and very bad WiFi.  So much family togetherness, even my teenager left saying "wow, this is AMAZING."  There's time for everything.  Also, we've adopted a dog and that has helped too.  Another "chore", for sure, but regular walks for all of us and time to just step away from the craziness.

[Nickel]

Thanks for the update! 

You sometimes left me amazed at your ability to articulate so well an argument or insight that I had only vaguely formulated in my mind.  That gift will serve you well no matter what you do in your retirement.  Glad you can now spend more quality time with those who know you best.

Cheers!

[sui generis]

Congrats on how well things are going and I hope your abstention can be a model for me.  Even the amount of time I spend on the internet now is, I know, too much to maximize my own happiness, but I have a hard time either scaling back or going cold turkey.  Then again, the more people that do it, the less interesting the internet gets, as shown by your friends here, and maybe that makes it easier in the end?

Continued best wishes...

[DavidAnnArbor]

Congratulations on shaping your life the way you see fit.
I will miss your gifted way of commenting on politics and life, and have always viewed you as a kind of Internet hero.

[Syonyk]

This is one instance where I would personally advocate for falling off the wagon and mainlining that shit.

Using drug terms applied to internet use would tend to illustrate the nature of the problem he's trying to solve.

Congrats on how well things are going and I hope your abstention can be a model for me.  Even the amount of time I spend on the internet now is, I know, too much to maximize my own happiness, but I have a hard time either scaling back or going cold turkey.

Lent is coming up.  Use it as an excuse to do something weird and disconnect outside requirements for work or occasional email use (as, at least for me, halfway important stuff does show up there).

Cold turkey back to "just the raw essentials" is far easier then restricting it.

Then again, the more people that do it, the less interesting the internet gets, as shown by your friends here, and maybe that makes it easier in the end?

*shrug*  Not my problem.  The voices that have taken over large parts of the internet are ones I want no part of, and between getting banned places for my vile habit of writing long form answers to stupidly common questions and then linking people to them, or just general hostility, I'm far happier spending less and less time on the internet.  And less time on news - is it local?  No?  Then either I'll hear about it from someone eventually and it matters (maybe), or I won't hear about it and it doesn't.

I'm happy retiring to my quiet backwaters of the internet, sounds like sol is doing much the same - best wishes!

[Louisville]

Sol,
Your writing in this forum has informed my thinking as much as anything I've ever read.
Thanks.

[Bateaux]

Glad all is well Sol.  We really miss you, but understand your decision and wish you well.  I know it's cold turkey for MMM. But, could we just get a little post once every few months.  You changed lives here, you impacted my life positively. We aren't greedy, just a few posts a year, throw us a bone.

[Fire1018]

I don't post very often, but I have truly enjoyed reading your posts and have learned a lot from them!  Sad to see you go.  Take care.

[sol]

Thanks for all of the kinds words, peeps!

I logged in today because someone sent a PM I wanted to respond to, but while I'm here I thought I'd offer you an update on retired life without the MMM forum.  As it turns out, it's not terrible!  Like giving up your forum addiction might actually make you happier!  Stay and learn when you need to, but once you're successfully retired?  I'm not sure why anyone would come back after you've already learned how to win that game.

So what have I been up to?  Well for one thing I've been working out a lot.  Once I got rid of the cubicle confinement and had more free time on my hands, I got onto a regular workout regimen and fixed my diet, and lost 25 pounds in the first three months, then started slowly adding some muscle.  I lift three days a week and a do cardio three days a week.  Now that I'm not constantly rushing everywhere all the time, finding an hour a day to take care of my body has been easy.  It's a pleasure, rather than a chore, because I like the way I look and feel as a result.  So does my wife.  And we've been home together 5 days a week without kids, so...

Recently I've been doing a lot of sea kayaking, both with a local outdoor group and just with my wife or other friends of ours.  Living on Puget Sound definitely has advantages.

I'm still doing all 2.5 of my volunteer gigs, though 1.5 of those are significantly curtailed at the moment because everything is closed here.

I've took up casual woodworking, mostly little puzzle boxes.  It's a fun thing to keep busy but I'm not nearly as serious about it as some people are.  I just like the intricate nature of concealed mechanisms, and I enjoy the process of making stuff.  I don't write much anymore, but I firmly believe that everyone needs some kind of creative outlet in their life.

I bought an electric bike and I've been riding it all over town.  Not just to the grocery store and the library, but like around town just for fun.  That's something I haven't done since I was like 12 years old.  What kind of grown-ass man goes for leisurely exploratory bike rides on sunny days, just for fun?  This guy does.

Oh, I learned to make sushi!  It's a lot more complicated than I was expecting.  I probably made sushi at least ten times before I finally got around to a recipe and procedure that I was really happy with. 

Yesterday I took the kids sailing.  It was glorious.

I do a lot more yard work and house projects and other domestic chores in support of my family.  I've started a cold-hardy succulent garden in one bed that I've always had trouble keeping properly irrigated.  I have garlic bulbs in my raised beds, and I recently acquired about 50 new day lilly bulbs from a family member who was clearing them out, so those are all out front.  My lawn is a dad-worthy pattern of cross-hatched mowing lines.

I still go to the dog park with my dad, and our dogs, every Saturday morning.

I'm kinda getting into ham radio stuff.  I've had my general license for years, but now some of my friends are getting involved with local emergency management groups for ham radio operators and I'm along for the ride.

At the moment, all three of my kids are home because schools are closed for six weeks.  Fortunately, since my wife and I are both retired, setting up home-school stuff has been pretty easy.  While everyone else in the world seems to be freaking out right now, being retired seems like a pretty good defense from a potential pandemic.  No need to go out unless you want to.  Not worried about losing my job, because I already gave it away.  Plenty of time to support my family.  I already paid off my mortgage so my expenses are minimal.  I'm not worried about the markets because I have no need to sell anytime soon.

And no, we haven't touched our investments.  Somehow, we haven't needed to sell a single share since retiring.

Life is good.  I don't stress about stuff.  I feel good.  Maybe my life seems boring now, from the perspective of someone who feels urgently connected to a purposeful mission tied to their profession, but that someone is definitely not me.  My former profession's urgent mission, as it turned out, was mostly smoke and mirrors anyway and what little reality it held was not dependent on my personal participation.  It's been reassuring to discover that the world continues to spin without my daily oversight.  Meanwhile, my kids and my spouse definitely DO need my daily personal participation, and being able to give it to them freely has been the best part of being happily unemployed and forum-free.

[Dee18]

Thanks for the update and congratulations on creating such a wonderful life!

[American GenX]

Good luck avoiding the Coronavirus also.  That can take a lot of happiness away.

[Buffaloski Boris]

Glad to hear from you, Sol. Now that you’ve left the forums, a vacuum has been left behind. And nature abhors a vacuum.

Sounds like you’re where you need to be and are having a great retirement.  That’s really cool. 

[American GenX]

Hang in there, Nancy.  These are difficult times.  Many people are scared and are being irrational.

[norajean]

You should try to let go of your anger about your job. It’s over.

[Dicey]

I popped in, expecting to find yet another lament about sol, and wow! It's an update from @sol himself! Yippee!!!

I stay because I want to make it easier for others to get to the kind of post-FIRE life I'm happily living. I ignore the political shit, and feel no need to follow any thread on any topic that's overly inflammatory. Somehow being FIRE makes it easier for shit to bounce off. Most days, anyway. A fair number of folks have migrated to another forum, never to be heard from again, but I'm happy dancing with the one that brought me. MMM  and this forum were good company in my quest, and I am forever grateful.

I'm happy that your post-FIRE life is so rewarding. We miss your wisdom here, but completely understand the decision to step away. A real update just brought a ray of sunshine into my gloomy self-quarantined day. THANKS, SOL!

P.S. Another big thank you to the person who poked the bear via pm.

[seattlecyclone]

Glad to hear you're doing well! I don't spend as much time on here as I did before I retired, and haven't felt the need to quit cold turkey. I pop in sometimes, check for thread titles that pique my interest, maybe reply on a couple of them, and then go about my day. I read a pretty small fraction of the new posts, and reply to even fewer.

This coronavirus thing has caused me to spend more time checking various news and social media than I probably should. This forum is far from the biggest culprit though. I keep thinking that surely some big news is coming out any second now and I should be aware of it right away. Irrational, I know.

[EscapeVelocity2020]

Thanks for the update Sol and great to hear good news for once! 

[LoanShark]

Glad to hear it!

[soccerluvof4]

Glad to hear from you Sol and that your doing well. Like you I am not as active as I once was or find myself typing something and then just deleting it because to much arguing, panic, etc.. But there are still alot of people I like to chat with and so on. Anyhow like I said glad your doing well , you were for sure one of the peeps i enjoyed following the most.

[techwiz]

Thanks for the update Sol and great to hear good news for once!

+1

That is a good news, I like hearing about how your FIRE plan is still successful even in this time of market decline and panic. 

[arebelspy]

Love it. Glad to hear life is good.

Thanks for the update.

[Cassie]

Happy to hear that your retirement is going well and you are enjoying your life.

[DavidAnnArbor]

Having garlic planted sounds great. In a couple of months you'll have a whole bunch of delicious garlic scapes.

[John Galt incarnate!]

Hello sol!

I am pleased to read you're having fun with your activities and having lost 25#s  are in good shape.

Always best regards,

JGi

[BigMoneyJim]

This coronavirus thing has caused me to spend more time checking various news and social media than I probably should.

Same problem here. There is an urgency felt that isn't actually personally applicable. My money is good, my plans are good. I just need to go out even less than I did before. Not much more to do for me than that.

Yeah, there is a huge, big problem out there, but there simply isn't anything I can do to affect it in a positive manner except stay out of the way.

[nsmall]

Thanks for update.  Miss your posts.