Negative people = Clouds on my sunny day

[Southern Stashian]

In my never ending quest to fend off the nay sayers that doubt our soon to be financial independence, I came across a saying as I was listening to some reggae and enjoying some of the beautiful 80 degree winter weather here in Florida. The saying was "Don't be a cloud on my sunny day" and it perfectly reflected my thoughts on the negativity people have and their attempts to bring us down on our quest for FI and ER.

I was home alone on a Monday with my wife at work and the kids off at school. My only "to do list" for the day was to enjoy some reggae music and a few beers while slowly smoking three racks of baby back ribs out in front of our garage for dinner later that night. I was sitting there relaxing and enjoying the beautiful, quiet day while the neighbors were coming and going, some of them looking at me as though being at home on a Monday with not a thing to do was odd.

As I sat there reading my book, I realized that this will soon be our lives - relaxing with the wife while others slave away, spending more quality time together, exercising, cooking, doing chores, picking the kids up from school and generally doing what we want - when we want. It instantly put a smile on my face to know that in our early 40's this will soon be our reality, while the neighbors will still be plugging away at their jobs and more and more looking like working zombies.

I have used "Don't be a cloud on my sunny day" on a few negative co-workers since hearing it and it has got the point across to them without being overly rude. Positivity, along with the other lifestyle changes that we have made has put targets on our backs for peoples negativity, but I'm glad that soon we will not have to be around that negativity anymore. ER can't come soon enough!


www.theFIguy.com

[Jamesqf]

A question, though: why on Earth do you think 80 degrees and sunny is beautiful winter weather?  I think it sucks big time, myself.  Indeed, I'm kinda bummed today because after a month of really beautiful winter weather - temps in the teens to 20s, lots of nice powder snow, frequent clouds to cut the glare and keep the snow in good condition - it's now in the mid-50s and sunny.

Same here in the summer: we get a stretch of unmercifully hot weather, not a cloud to mitigate the sun's glare, and when I hope for some slight relief all the forecasters are for "another beautiful sunny day".

[Southern Stashian]

A question, though: why on Earth do you think 80 degrees and sunny is beautiful winter weather?  I think it sucks big time, myself.  Indeed, I'm kinda bummed today because after a month of really beautiful winter weather - temps in the teens to 20s, lots of nice powder snow, frequent clouds to cut the glare and keep the snow in good condition - it's now in the mid-50s and sunny.

Same here in the summer: we get a stretch of unmercifully hot weather, not a cloud to mitigate the sun's glare, and when I hope for some slight relief all the forecasters are for "another beautiful sunny day".

Lol. If I was into different activities (skiing / snowboarding) I think I would agree, but there are plane tickets for that. For me 80 degrees anytime of the year is great, especially in this area of the country (central Florida). Most of the year we endure hot, humid tropical weather to the point that during the day in late spring, summer and early fall can be brutally uncomfortable.

The beach this time of year is warm and relaxing with spring suits instead of full 3/2 wetsuits, good winter swells and great surf fishing making me a happy guy. In addition, we're @ 5 miles from the coast so the warmer weather is a plus. Open windows, dry 60 degree breezes swaying the palm trees at night and I'm in heaven. We live here for these times of the year and deal with the heat once it comes again.


www.theFIguy.com

[William]

Lol. If I was into different activities (skiing / snowboarding) I think I would agree, but there are plane tickets for that.

There are plane tickets for that.  Haha, I will remember that when someone here in Nebraska complains about our lack of an ocean.

[Jamesqf]

The beach this time of year is warm and relaxing with spring suits instead of full 3/2 wetsuits, good winter swells and great surf fishing making me a happy guy. In addition, we're @ 5 miles from the coast so the warmer weather is a plus. Open windows, dry 60 degree breezes swaying the palm trees at night and I'm in heaven.

To each his own, I guess, but you're sort of missing my point.  Why assume that everyone else is going to like what you like?  That sunny days are the only kind anyone wants?  I happen to like clouds myself, and a little variety in weather, as in life generally.

[lizzigee]

The point didn't seem to be that everyone had to agree about whether or not 80 degrees was beautiful weather James, it was that he was enjoying it. (we work in Celsius here and I can't be bothered checking to see what his 80 translates to in real weather, it's actually irrelevant.)

Enjoy your 80 degrees Southern Stachian, and congrats on being close to living your dream, whatever it is.

[Southern Stashian]

The beach this time of year is warm and relaxing with spring suits instead of full 3/2 wetsuits, good winter swells and great surf fishing making me a happy guy. In addition, we're @ 5 miles from the coast so the warmer weather is a plus. Open windows, dry 60 degree breezes swaying the palm trees at night and I'm in heaven.

To each his own, I guess, but you're sort of missing my point.  Why assume that everyone else is going to like what you like?  That sunny days are the only kind anyone wants?  I happen to like clouds myself, and a little variety in weather, as in life generally.

Jamesqf, lets not turn this into a "What I like vs what you like" discussion. Never was that implied and the simple point of the post was that people are constantly trying to derail our positivity and progress towards FI and ER, hence like a cloud on a sunny day. I also never said that what I like is what everyone should like, sunny days and 80's in the winter should be the norm for everyone and people who love clouds suck. I think you have read a little too deep into my post and as a result have become "a cloud on my sunny day" in regards to this post. Lol


www.theFIguy.com

[Jamesqf]

Jamesqf, lets not turn this into a "What I like vs what you like" discussion. Never was that implied and the simple point of the post was that people are constantly trying to derail our positivity and progress towards FI and ER, hence like a cloud on a sunny day.

Whyever not?  It's much more interesting (to me, anyway) than yet another whine about how anyone who dares discuss the possible negatives of various FI/RE plans - or even suggest that retirement might quickly come to be a bore - is just another "complainypants".  As I said (though perhaps some didn't understand the metaphor I was trying to use), those clouds are often more interesting than the sunny days.

[twinge]

those clouds are often more interesting than the sunny days

Maybe not quite what you meant but the sort of universal love of positivity--"sunniness" /rejection of negativity always makes me think of the Tolstoy quote:"happily families are all alike, but every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."   While I have a fairly positive temperament--I don't really have a dislike for negativity in others.  Repetitive whining or knee-jerk contrarian-ness  if not done with self-awareness, wit or honesty can grate on my nerves--but so can endless boring "sunniness."  Some of my favorite, funniest and most interesting friends are cranky, pessimistic and irritable.  Others I love are pretty happy and easygoing. All told, I probably value the people who question my optimistic plans than those who are just boosters.  It matters more to me if people seem to have good character and if they are smart and interesting than if they are sunny. 

[Jamesqf]

Repetitive whining or knee-jerk contrarian-ness  if not done with self-awareness, wit or honesty can grate on my nerves--but so can endless boring "sunniness."

Exactly.  It's the unthinking part that gets to me, whether it's unthinking optimism or unthinking negativity.

[Southern Stashian]

those clouds are often more interesting than the sunny days

Maybe not quite what you meant but the sort of universal love of positivity--"sunniness" /rejection of negativity always makes me think of the Tolstoy quote:"happily families are all alike, but every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."   While I have a fairly positive temperament--I don't really have a dislike for negativity in others.  Repetitive whining or knee-jerk contrarian-ness  if not done with self-awareness, wit or honesty can grate on my nerves--but so can endless boring "sunniness."  Some of my favorite, funniest and most interesting friends are cranky, pessimistic and irritable.  Others I love are pretty happy and easygoing. All told, I probably value the people who question my optimistic plans than those who are just boosters.  It matters more to me if people seem to have good character and if they are smart and interesting than if they are sunny.

Twinge, you are right about having diverse friends. Some of our best friends are also the cranky, throw down at the drop of a dime type and the others tend to be more relaxed and let things go faster - which I tend to do myself. While they are all good friends and we have shared a lot of good times, none of them are the type to attempt to bring us down in any way, whether it is with our financial plans (FI and ER) or anything else in life (at least not to our faces, lol). A little light hearted jabbing is always to be expected, but never has it became serious.

I have never wanted a group of "cheerleaders" around me, just people who can be honest with their opinions without being an ass. Maybe thats why we have gradually cut the people out of our lives who constantly introduce drama into every situation and formed stronger relationships with the one's who offer their honest opinions and different viewpoints without being overly pessimistic. If being optimistic means being called a "cheerleader" then so be it. I would rather be surrounded by these so called cheerleaders then bombarded by peoples doom and gloom and conspiracy theories everyday.

[Southern Stashian]

Repetitive whining or knee-jerk contrarian-ness  if not done with self-awareness, wit or honesty can grate on my nerves--but so can endless boring "sunniness."

Exactly.  It's the unthinking part that gets to me, whether it's unthinking optimism or unthinking negativity.

Please, define "unthinking" as it relates to peoples posivity or negativity .... How would you or I be able to determine how much "thinking" someone has put into their optimism or pessimism, without being in their shoes, to be able to label them as an "unthinking" type? Please elaborate ......


www.theFIguy.com

[Jamesqf]

Please, define "unthinking" as it relates to peoples posivity or negativity .... How would you or I be able to determine how much "thinking" someone has put into their optimism or pessimism, without being in their shoes, to be able to label them as an "unthinking" type? Please elaborate ......

I can cite no better example of unthinking optimism than the one I used earlier, the radio/tv weather people who proclaim "it's going to be another beautiful day" when the temperatures are forecast to be well over 100F.