The Money Mustache Community
General Discussion => Welcome and General Discussion => Topic started by: shmadas on March 04, 2017, 11:41:56 AM
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Hello Mustachians-
MMM had a great post a while back about "Outrageous Optimism" (http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2012/10/03/the-practical-benefits-of-outrageous-optimism/), and he described what he called an "Optimism Gun."
I think this is a great concept, and I try to look on the bright side of everything as much as I can.
Yet ever since the election, I feel like every time I open up the news, I get a big downer that no amount of optimism can overcome. I know I can just stop reading the news, but yet I feel drawn back each time like a moth sucked into flames.
I was wondering if anyone else out there is wrestling with a similar issue, and in particular if anyone has managed to regain some optimism in what seems a bleak post-truth world.
(I'm reminded of the line from Kung Fu Panda 2: "How can kung fu stop something that stops kung fu?")
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I'm not an optimist by any means, but if something in my life causes me repeated stress or "down-ness", it's gone. News doesn't bother me personally, but if it did, you can bet it would not be a part of my life. If it's hard to quit something, find something similar to replace it with.
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Yes - I've been depressed and really don't have any idea how to pull myself out of it. And furthermore - everyone I know is the same way. Nobody knows what to do. We volunteer and march.
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Turn it off. This is why I pay zero attention to politics. Politics can only get you down as more and more people are so convinced only they are right and everyone else is wrong. it's a shame.
I also pay very little attention to the news. My parents used to have news blasting on the TV all the time and I hated it. I hate the news because it's all about the stuff that doesn't pertain to me. I want to focus inward on my world and what I can positively affect.
I turned off the damn TV. I only watch Youtube videos of positive channels, where people are making progress in life, having success, and living the way they want to live. I watch a lot of TEDx talks...there is so much useful information buried in those. I watch a lot of fitness channels, health / nutrition channels, etc. 99% of my video watching is watching 5-10 minute snippet videos on Youtube when I need a lift. The rest of the time I exercise, go out with family / friends, and only spend time with positive people doing positive things, like play, exercise, socialize, and enjoy a good time (with very little alcohol).
You have more control today over what you are exposed to, there is so much more useful and relevant information available on demand today, than at any other time in history.
To allow yourself to be mindlessly exposed to TV, news, politics, is inexcusable. How will negative information / misery help you? When it comes to the next election, get informed as much as possible and vote with your conscious. Until then, soaking in all the negative crap won't help you one bit.
PS - did you go to the gym today or get some exercise? It's beautiful spring weather, on a lovely Saturday no less! Get out there and do something for your body and mind! I just came back from the gym... a beautiful 1 hour workout / meditation for the mind. My body is pumped, my mind is clear, my stomach is hungry. Time for some delicious grub!
PPS - a great book to read is "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k" by Mark Manson. it's about not caring about shit you can't control, stuff that won't help you. Focus only on things that can make a difference in your life, help you be better. I bought this via Google Play with a $5 credit promotion and it helps reinforce why people should refocus their lives. A good summary and article here: https://markmanson.net/not-giving-a-fuck
PPPS - as Mr. Mustache has often said, we modern humans today live in the lap of luxury that the most powerful kings / queens / emperors of past centuries could only wet dream about. Our lives are millions of times better than humans who have ever lived before us. Why do we allow ourselves to feel depressed and down? We are the most f**king lucky bastards alive on the planet today, and possibly in the entire universe. We are living in the golden age of the universe, where there are plenty of stars and galaxies. In the future stars will die out, the universe will go cold, and there will be no life left. We are the most f**king lucky things ever to exist in the universe so far. If you ALLOW yourself to feel negative, depressed, or down, that is such a tragedy and shame. Feel blessed with what you have today. If you woke up this morning, had electricity, could communicate with strangers across the world instantly, and had the choice to do nothing and lay in bed all day, or go out and f**k around and do whatever, you are a freaking lucky bastard. Now STOP FEELING MISERABLE and make use of this awesome time and freedom you have!!
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You're not alone! I can't bear the news, and I can't bear to be away from the news. What if I miss something critical??? I understand the benefits of a "Low-Information Diet" but somehow can't turn away.
I accidentally fell into doing qi gong ("energy practice") moving meditation as part of a yoga class about a month ago (even going to the class bordered on accidental - I'm not the most bendy person ever). What I've found is that when I practice qi gong even 10-15 minutes a couple times a week, my equilibrium overall is SO MUCH BETTER.
YouTube has some good beginner qi gong videos. Don Fiore is a practitioner who includes a series of affirmations as he goes. Here are a couple of short (5-6 minute) videos:
Daily Qigong with Affirmations, Part 1 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtW61pBn3XQ)
Daily Qigong with Affirmations, Part 2 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwfRhz2weUQ)
Give it a try. I think it's a great return on a 10-minute investment of my time. Now, when I can't sleep at night, I remember that I have a little ball of qi inside, and I open it up and release it through my body. I'm usually asleep before I even get it out to my fingertips!
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You're not alone! I can't bear the news, and I can't bear to be away from the news. What if I miss something critical??? I understand the benefits of a "Low-Information Diet" but somehow can't turn away.
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I understand that psychology... believe you me, if something critical will happen, you can bet your life you'll hear about it via twitter, facebook, instagram, snapchat, google plus, youtube, your neighbors, your trash man, your grocery clerk, a SMS to your phone, emergency alerts to your phone. The chance of you not knowing about it is about 1 in 50 billion. And when in your life did you miss something critical anyway? Before modern TV, before internet, before telephones, people didn't have anything to deliver news except the slow old newspaper. Life was simpler, and perhaps a little better in that regard. I love technology, but people misuse technology to f**k themselves over.
Therefore, change your mindset. Assume you will be notified in the event aliens land, a huge asteroid will wipe out life on the planet, or 6 countries have launched nuclear missiles at all of us. You'll hear about it everywhere. You won't miss that critical information, but you won't make a difference in that case anyway, so I'd probably want to be dumb and ignorant in that case. :)
Turn it off. Get any negativity out of your life. Improve your life and improve the lives of the loved ones in your life.
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Turn it off. Get any negativity out of your life. Improve your life and improve the lives of the loved ones in your life.
Plus fuckin one to this.
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Politics can only get you down as more and more people are so convinced only they are right and everyone else is wrong. it's a shame.
Yep... intolerance is rampant in both parties and everywhere in between. I've cut politics out of my life, almost completely. I do want to follow and major changes to the tax code though :)
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You could either adopt a "low information diet" or you could get involved in a cause that you really believe in, meet people you agree with and feel like you're making a difference. There are a whole lot of people organizing to take on the challenges being presented by this administration. If the things being proposed and passed bother you, do something about it. If we all just ignored it, there would be no change.
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You could either adopt a "low information diet" or you could get involved in a cause that you really believe in, meet people you agree with and feel like you're making a difference. There are a whole lot of people organizing to take on the challenges being presented by this administration. If the things being proposed and passed bother you, do something about it. If we all just ignored it, there would be no change.
I don't feel like I'm on a "low information" diet. Quite the opposite, I probably get more information than most of my peers. Just the fact that I've been doing a ton of research on MMM means I'm ahead of most people.
I'm actually on a "selective information" or "positive information" diet, meaning that 70-80% of information I get is information I CHOOSE to spend my time on. There's always a 20-30% of information that gets to me no matter what, because I live in modern society where information is everywhere. Hell, even out of the blue my yard guy wanted to talk politics. I just politely informed him that I wasn't happy about current events but there were not many things I could do personally, so I'm going to wait until the next time I vote.
I'm glad there are people do organize and try to push against bad agendas. I'm not in a position of power and too far away from DC to affect what personally, so I do what I can and focus on my personal sphere of influence.
So I think "low information" is bad, but focused information is good.
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Objectively, the world IS getting MUCH, MUCH better. Here are some facts that prove it, beyond any doubt:
http://www.vox.com/2014/11/24/7272929/charts-thankful
and
http://www.vox.com/the-big-idea/2016/12/23/14062168/history-global-conditions-charts-life-span-poverty
Here's some of my favorites (among many, many other data sets):
Global poverty rate is shrinking:
(https://wearechange.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/global-poverty-600x268.png)
Infant Mortality is down:
(https://www.unicef.org/progressforchildren/2007n6/images/pfc6_mdg4_under-five_mortality_rate_per_1000_live_births_by_region.gif)
Heart Disease and Cancer deaths are falling:
(https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/figures/m6337qsf.gif)
Smoking rates are way down:
(http://content.gallup.com/origin/gallupinc/GallupSpaces/Production/Cms/POLL/bnmu_fo3fekal8tb180bvw.png)
Death from wars and battles is way, way, way down:
(http://s.wsj.net/public/resources/images/RV-AE378_VIOLEN_G_20110923205707.jpg)
Violent Crime in the US is at historic lows:
(http://content.gallup.com/origin/gallupinc/GallupSpaces/Production/Cms/POLL/ldah6rdp6ukvngoyqi1fcg.gif)
Education levels are up across the board:
(https://cdn-images-1.medium.com/max/2000/0*ayKfGrdCxU_J1hM2.png)
Solar power is trending toward becoming majorly affordable:
(https://cdn0.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/2360806/solar_power.0.png)
People living in democracies is way, way up too:
(http://sundaymagazine.org/wp-content/uploads/percent-of-world-citizens-living-in-democracy-by-year.png)
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The Universe will eventually die of heat death. Nothing you can do is that level of fuckup.
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WRT US politics, just remember that local STATES have a large power to make decisions in their own right.
Yes, I have been surprised by what executive orders have attempted to be implemented, but this is primarily related to international policy, the dollar, trade internationally, military, and border control. Of the other departments, environment, energy, schools, etc, the STATE will take up the slack, or already has a lot of control over what happens in their territories.
Media makes the impact seem much larger than it actually is. There is so much more happening in the world than Trump.
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Hello Mustachians-
Yet ever since the election, I feel like every time I open up the news, I get a big downer that no amount of optimism can overcome. I know I can just stop reading the news, but yet I feel drawn back each time like a moth sucked into flames.
I was wondering if anyone else out there is wrestling with a similar issue, and in particular if anyone has managed to regain some optimism in what seems a bleak post-truth world.
Golly, I'm just the opposite, we finally have a leader, we have someone interested in getting the economy going. We have someone with business experience and a is a job creator.
Small business is very optimistic about the future.
Just wish the snowflakes would quit whining and let him have some time to work.
PS. to an administrator, I have attached a graph of small business Optimism, but don't see it in the preview,
why is that? I also don't see "place inline" below the text window, like I think I used to see.
EDIT: well I see it came through, but why don't I see it on preview?
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Thanks for the great graphs. I fire up $#%! meditation and it really works great! :) it is worth your 2 minutes to follow the link.!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_K4HajZfVk
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I agree with the selective information diet. As a gay man I have personally not been attacked, but I have had friends called gay slurs in public since the election. The church I live next to (mostly gay congregation) was painted with swastikas and gay slurs. The hate that the orange oaf embraced has really hit home with me. I try get the news without watching it constantly. In the mean time I've booked my travel and lodging for the LGBTQ protest march in June.
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Golly, I'm just the opposite, we finally have a leader, we have someone interested in getting the economy going. We have someone with business experience and a is a job creator.
Small business is very optimistic about the future.
Just wish the snowflakes would quit whining and let him have some time to work.
Go troll somewhere else.
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I agree with the selective information diet. As a gay man I have personally not been attacked, but I have had friends called gay slurs in public since the election.
And this never happened before the election?
The church I live next to (mostly gay congregation) was painted with swastikas and gay slurs. The hate that the orange oaf embraced has really hit home with me.
I have never felt that Trump has endorsed hate, I'm sorry about the church, it is just plain wrong and I hope it stops. I don't know why people would think just because Trump is president that these types of things would be alright to do. Be aware it is just a small group of haters, most of us are not thinking like that!
btw, he may be a little orange, but he's no oaf.
I try get the news without watching it constantly.
From were I sit there is so much spin in the news, I flip around and the same story can
sound so much different when watched on MSNBC vs FOX or even CNN.
In the mean time I've booked my travel and lodging for the LGBTQ protest march in June.
As is your right under our wonderful constitution.
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Golly, I'm just the opposite, we finally have a leader, we have someone interested in getting the economy going. We have someone with business experience and a is a job creator.
Small business is very optimistic about the future.
Just wish the snowflakes would quit whining and let him have some time to work.
Go troll somewhere else.
No troll, as I said I just have the opposite view of the leadership and future that was expressed.
I lived through 8 years of Obama, and in my opinion, the economy had hit a trough and no matter how bad
Obama's strategies were it was bound to turn around and it did grow slightly. Obamacare limited some of the job growth by making many of them part time to avoid the rules. Obamacare didn't lower my premiums by $2,500 a year it increased them, by more than that. As it now stands I have non Obamacare policy costing $10,200 that is just as good as an Obamacare policy costing $16,900. And no one has to reach in their pocket to subsidize my non Obamacare policy.
The household income under Obama dropped. As a black president I think he dropped the ball on doing much to help Blacks as far as jobs and inner city problems. I have more faith that Trump will get more done on this than Obama did.
So yes, I'm optimistic about the future.
Go outside and smell the fresh air, my lemon trees are in full bloom, it smells great!
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I would (and do) specifically replace the depressing activity (e.g., reading news) with happifying activities (meetups, organizing community events, hosting a potluck, learning an instrument, etc). So, not just avoiding the former, but directly implementing the latter in its place.
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I agree with the selective information diet. As a gay man I have personally not been attacked, but I have had friends called gay slurs in public since the election.
And this never happened before the election?
The church I live next to (mostly gay congregation) was painted with swastikas and gay slurs. The hate that the orange oaf embraced has really hit home with me.
I have never felt that Trump has endorsed hate, I'm sorry about the church, it is just plain wrong and I hope it stops. I don't know why people would think just because Trump is president that these types of things would be alright to do. Be aware it is just a small group of haters, most of us are not thinking like that!
btw, he may be a little orange, but he's no oaf.
I try get the news without watching it constantly.
From were I sit there is so much spin in the news, I flip around and the same story can
sound so much different when watched on MSNBC vs FOX or even CNN.
In the mean time I've booked my travel and lodging for the LGBTQ protest march in June.
As is your right under our wonderful constitution.
No, it did not happen at the rate it is happening now. I never experienced it in fact. Trump failed to even distance himself from the KKK when asked the direct question. He's taking advice from Bannon for god's sake. There is verifiable proof that hate crimes saw an uptick during trumps campaign and post election. Trump very clearly embraced and fanned to flames of hate. He has already used his presidency to to further that agenda with his executive orders. He spends his time tweeting about nonsense not trying to help the average american. His proposals are to cut taxes on the rich and increase deficit spending. As to your last point, 18 states have introduced bills to limit our rights to protest. I'm sure it's easy to not give a shit as a straight white rich male, but there's a hell of a lot of us who don't fit that bill.
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I would (and do) specifically replace the depressing activity (e.g., reading news) with happifying activities (meetups, organizing community events, hosting a potluck, learning an instrument, etc). So, not just avoiding the former, but directly implementing the latter in its place.
"Meetup" is great! I just went on my first hike yesterday with about 20 people,
I have a wildlife hike and visit to a caverns on the 17th of this month, looking
forward to it.
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Yes! And, I'm one of those people who can't feel good simply by ensuring me and my dearest are served. I weirdly care as much about everyone else. So, when I say meetup, organize events, etc, doing so can counter the depressed feelings about people being attacked, abandoned, etc, by *directly preventing or changing these*.
When we organize an event (not just a protest, but also warm, fun community play gatherings), we:
meet our neighbours,
hang with a diverse group of people,
make clear we love and are available to people outside of ourselves,
find out how we can support each other,
laugh,
hug,
resolve our prejudices,
facilitate the resolution of another's prejudice,
etc.
Here was my bigger post in this vein:
https://brainquirkcash.com/2016/11/10/10-ways-to-rise-re-trump/
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Happiness is a choice. Which path will you decide to take?
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Golly, I'm just the opposite, we finally have a leader, we have someone interested in getting the economy going. We have someone with business experience and a is a job creator.
Small business is very optimistic about the future.
Just wish the snowflakes would quit whining and let him have some time to work.
I hate politics, and posts like this is why I hate politics. You make some amazing statements about Trump, that are not backed by facts.
I'm a Republican (in gun friendly AZ no less!), but I really disagree with those statements. Trump leveraged his way to success, while doing multiple bankruptcies to shaft other investors with his failures. He was born with a silver spoon and leveraged his way to bigger success. Trouble is, you can't bankrupt portions of the government to bigger success.
Also, Trump has possible psychological issues. The man seems to ignore reality, makes weird random accusations (like the recent Obama wire tap claim), focuses on irrelevant things (why tweet about Meryl Streep or Hollywood stuff when there are far more important things to worry about?), and does rash things quickly without thinking them through (the several times defeated immigration ban is one classic example). He also opposes the EPA / environment, consumer friendly things like net neutrality.
The very fact you label Trump doubters as "snowflakes" shows your real bias. If Obama had done anything close to what Trump has done, you would probably be in arms right now (literally) with many other Trump supporters who seem to selectively ignore facts and reality.
This is why politics is such a pain in the ass. People can't even reasonably debate Trump supporters like you. No person is perfect. Trump is full of flaws. And yet most Trump supporters seem to stick their hands in their ears and say "blah blah blah I can't hear you." Trump is trolling the US hard... he's testing how much his followers will put up with. This latest nonsense about Obama tapping his phone is absurd and incredulous. Trump is a nut and should be impeached as he is unfit for command.
Sadly there are those who will think of him as an untouchable God and even if Trump grabs pussies, or kills someone, in their eyes he can do no wrong. Such a shame.
/off my soapbox now.
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I came to this thread hoping for an optimism boost myself, and got the opposite :(
For myself, I've stopped seeking out news, I quit Facebook, and I don't even listen to the radio in the car anymore. I trust that if something important enough that I need to know happens, my friends or coworkers will mention it and I can ask them to explain or look it up at that point. Instead, I'm focusing on unplugging from the internet and doing offline hobbies, mostly reading. It's helped my personal happiness a lot in the past few months. I also attended one of the marches in January, and I may do more if I hear about them.
Basically, as I saw it I had two choices - 1) Disconnect and stop paying attention to the little things, and trust my friends to inform me on the big things, or 2) Put a lot of effort into learning the truth behind the news stories, call my congressman and local politicians regularly, and get as involved as possible to see if I can help improve the situation. I weighed those choices for myself, and decided that 1) would make me happier than 2).
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The media (including new media like Facebook and threads like this one) drive political polarization. It's impossible to be optimistic when highly polarized people are basically yelling at each other all the time. Which is what we have here in this country right now. The ONLY solution is to stop playing. The moment you engage, you've already lost.
Get rid of cable, stop visiting news sites, stop listening to talk radio and ruthlessly edit your Facebook/Twitter/MMM/whatever online discussions.
I can't get upset about what happens at the national level (or any other level), if I don't hear about it. I've been doing this since the election, and guess what? I'm a lot more calm and happy that pretty much everyone I know.
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Golly, I'm just the opposite, we finally have a leader, we have someone interested in getting the economy going. We have someone with business experience and a is a job creator.
Small business is very optimistic about the future.
Just wish the snowflakes would quit whining and let him have some time to work.
I hate politics, and posts like this is why I hate politics. You make some amazing statements about Trump, that are not backed by facts.
I don't really want to cause a big argument, but what did I say above that is so amazing?
And second he has only been in office a little over 5 weeks.
I'm a Republican (in gun friendly AZ no less!), but I really disagree with those statements. Trump leveraged his way to success, while doing multiple bankruptcies to shaft other investors with his failures.
Bankruptcy is not good but it is part of our tax code, for use of business and individuals.
He was born with a silver spoon and leveraged his way to bigger success.
He can't help the advantage he was born with, at least he did something with it.
Trouble is, you can't bankrupt portions of the government to bigger success.
Did you say that with a straight face, when Obama added $9 Trillion to a $10.8 Trillion federal debt?
"IF" Trump can grow the economy we might be able to afford some of the spending he is proposing.
I understand that is an "IF".
Also, Trump has possible psychological issues. The man seems to ignore reality, makes weird random accusations (like the recent Obama wire tap claim), focuses on irrelevant things (why tweet about Meryl Streep or Hollywood stuff when there are far more important things to worry about?), and does rash things quickly without thinking them through (the several times defeated immigration ban is one classic example). He also opposes the EPA / environment, consumer friendly things like net neutrality.
"Possible, psychological issues" he sure built a large business and a great family with those "psychological issues" but we will see.
Yep, we'll see if the wire tap claim was stupid thing for him to tweet. I agree that he should not tweet stupidly.
The 120 day refugee admission suspension from seven countries is debatable, The seven counties put on the list were chosen by the Obama administration as having individuals that could be a problem.
The very fact you label Trump doubters as "snowflakes" shows your real bias.
Not really Trump doubters that I would call "snowflakes" search out some youtube videos of
those poor souls crying in the streets or screaming at the top of their lungs about something probably
not understandable.
If Obama had done anything close to what Trump has done, you would probably be in arms right now (literally) with many other Trump supporters who seem to selectively ignore facts and reality.
This is why politics is such a pain in the ass. People can't even reasonably debate Trump supporters like you. No person is perfect. Trump is full of flaws. And yet most Trump supporters seem to stick their hands in their ears and say "blah blah blah I can't hear you." Trump is trolling the US hard... he's testing how much his followers will put up with. This latest nonsense about Obama tapping his phone is absurd and incredulous. Trump is a nut and should be impeached as he is unfit for command.
Sadly there are those who will think of him as an untouchable God and even if Trump grabs pussies, or kills someone, in their eyes he can do no wrong. Such a shame.
/off my soapbox now.
And there you go, "making some amazing statements about Trump, that are not backed by facts."
So let's call it even and hope the economy grows, available jobs increase, wages rise, inflation is low,
the stock market climbs, and we all reach FIRE and find great things to do with our time.
Oh and btw I do know Trump is not perfect, but I'm optimistic America will have success under his leadership.
Sincerely, I hope you have a great day.
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Nikolai Volkoff and The Iron Shiek like this thread.
I, and hopefully many other red-white-and-blue blooded Americans, not so much.
I suggest any American that needs an Optimism Boost flees this great land for how ever long enough it takes you to realize how good you have it. It is a great time for all humanity to be alive, and Americans are the most fortunate of all.
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I was wondering if anyone else out there is wrestling with a similar issue, and in particular if anyone has managed to regain some optimism in what seems a bleak post-truth world.
Not me. Since Caine killed Able there has been strife in the world. If you want to find it, you will. If you want to be miserable, you will. If you want to be happy, you will.
There are no unwilling victims.
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Here is a great stoic take on this: http://modernstoicism.com/on-outrage-trump-is-the-obstacle-and-the-way-by-marco-bronx/
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^ WOW!!! I hadn't been a fan of stoicism up until that article. I'm actually only halfway through it now, but absolutely delighted by it! Thank you, OurTown.
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http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-to-stay-sane-in-era-non-stop-outrage/ (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-to-stay-sane-in-era-non-stop-outrage/)
BTDretire - how does that kool aid taste? Frosty and delicious I hope.
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I went through a few stages of coping. A few tools I use/d: therapy, eating healthy (majority vegetables, fruits, seeds, and legumes), meditation (I used the App 'Insight Timer' which has free guided meditations), focusing on changing the things I can (applied for citizenship), and I have been trying/planning to exercise more. Making more effort to be intimate with my husband has also helped. I don't know your relationship situation but I figured it was worth mentioning. Endorphins are great.
For news, specifically, I didn't quit Facebook but I 'unfollowed' all my friends and fan pages over a year ago due to other distress I was facing at the time. That really helped. I can still IM my family and friends overseas but I don't have to see all their opinions, argument, laments, news blurts and etc. I like them a lot more than when I used to witness all that stuff. I've never really used any of the other social media platforms.
The main source of my news now is my Google Now news feed on my phone. I curate it carefully but things I don't want to see still slip through. It's getting easier to just skim and swipe away the irrelevant stuff because I'm in a more emotionally stable place than I was. I could just uninstall the app if I really wanted to get away from it, though. I get a lot of recipe suggestions now which make me happy - I Google a lot of recipes and it populates based partially on my searches.
I've been considering subscribing to The Economist because they're more what I'm looking for - analysis without much opinion to color it. Also, my husband keeps recommending 538 (Nate Silver's media site) for that sort of information without slant but I haven't really given them a try yet, to be honest. I actually find that sane reporting, more than just avoiding all media, has helped me cope more. They balance out the hype that's, to some degree, unavoidable. Cable News is almost always on in waiting rooms in my area, coworkers talk about politics, my husband sometimes can't help himself and will tell me something he thinks I 'should know' and so on. I learnt the hard way not to talk to my family back home in New Zealand about US politics. No optimism to spare in that conversation!
Our dog, husband's childhood pet of 16 years, passed away in early November which was hard. For a few months I have been enjoying the Mustachian smugness of having no pet expenses but the dog was a therapy animal for the husband person so he's been struggling even more than usual. I decided that we'll get a puppy once we're out of debt. We would get a cat but our flat mate is allergic. A pet is not a frugal choice but it's one of those situations where sanity is priceless and he hasn't found a therapy to replace having a pet. I have to admit, though, thinking about getting a little American Spitz/Eskimo Dog Puppy and looking up videos of them has really cheered us up the past week...
Also @WeRateDogs. They're good dogs. (If you like dogs...)
Mostly I try to remind myself that every generation laments/predicts the decline of society. The data tends to suggest the opposite (as evidenced by some lovely graphs in previous posts by helpful people) is in fact true.
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Here's a different take- focus locally. So, national politics really sucks and gets me down no matter which party is being discussed. But I also believe it's my duty to know what the hell is going on. So, last year I became involved locally. I attend town council meetings and do a bi-weekly FB video regarding the discussion, outcomes and public comments. I feel like I'm helping to inform myself and others but it's not a huge downer plus I've gotten to know a lot of my neighbors!
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It is clear that debate has shifted this thread away from the optimism boost some of you were seeking.
Is there an existing thread about techniques to establish and maintain the "low information diet"? Perhaps one that hasn't seen any posts since the last Presidential campaign?
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Here is a great stoic take on this: http://modernstoicism.com/on-outrage-trump-is-the-obstacle-and-the-way-by-marco-bronx/
That was pretty great, thank you.
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Thanks for sharing that article. Really great!
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I take this as two steps forward, one step back. The far right is lashing out because the long term is not going on their favor. Instead of getting depressed, we folks on the left need to take this as an opportunity to regalvanize. We've been fighting for a long time, and this is a good reminder we're not done. Look at how far we've come against just as much opposition. Get fired up.
I agree with the selective information diet. As a gay man I have personally not been attacked, but I have had friends called gay slurs in public since the election. The church I live next to (mostly gay congregation) was painted with swastikas and gay slurs. The hate that the orange oaf embraced has really hit home with me. I try get the news without watching it constantly. In the mean time I've booked my travel and lodging for the LGBTQ protest march in June.
When my conservative Alabama mother accepts my husband as her son-in-law, I think the tide is changing. We've come along way, so it's a just matter of not forgetting to keep pushing.
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After Nov. 8th, I stopped reading politics, stopped browsing news sites, ignore political comments and news from my coworkers and boss. I don't want to hear what President Pussy Grabber has done or said or lied about today or any other day.
If anything really important (Muslim ban) or really hilarious (like the Bowling Green Massacre) happens, I've asked my friends to let me know.
But I'm still part of the good ol' US or A, and I know I need to do my part. I research and vote, religiously. I need to get into writing letters to my senators and representatives. I try to practice the change I want to be, discourage talk of hate and bigotry, stand up for myself and for other oppressed people. I identify causes and organizations that could use assistant, both large and small, and donate. I need to march-- I plan on it, soon. For a while, I worked with kids, and tried to encourage open dialog and discourage hateful talk about other groups. (There's very little sadder than mentoring an child and later seeing her scream about how being gay is disgusting with no real understanding of what that means or entails, or denigrating the latin@ students that are her peers and classmates.)
Do your part, whatever that means to you. "I made the difference that I could, today," are words with a lot of power, and it's more than many others can say. Maybe ask someone who actually wants to follow politics (a close friend or relative) to be your info filter, and then stop watching the trainwreck. It's going to go on for 4 years at least, and it's going to happen whether or not you're watching. Don't subject yourself to that.
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PPS - a great book to read is "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k" by Mark Manson. it's about not caring about shit you can't control, stuff that won't help you. Focus only on things that can make a difference in your life, help you be better. I bought this via Google Play with a $5 credit promotion and it helps reinforce why people should refocus their lives. A good summary and article here: https://markmanson.net/not-giving-a-fuck
+1 This is a great book (great on Audible as well). I read a lot of self-improvement books, and this is one my favorites.
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Thank you all very much for your comments and suggestions. I've been doing a lot of thinking about this over the past few days, inspired in large part by what you wrote and the articles you linked to (and some that they linked to).
I forgot to mention in the OP that up to the election, I was on a fairly low-information diet and had been for a few years ever since reading 4HWW, where I first heard of the concept. And indeed, in that time, I enjoyed the benefits of the diet and the realization that politics was mostly "same shit, different day."
But somehow in the lead-up to the election I got sucked into the coverage, and the shit-storm thenceforth has only captivated me more. I think that I felt that the current situation is so far from business as usual, with levels of vitriol and disregard for precedent or basic human dignity, that it was perhaps some "new shit."
The stoic approach, as the article by http://modernstoicism.com/on-outrage-trump-is-the-obstacle-and-the-way-by-marco-bronx/
pointed out, is to take a longer view, as well as to realize my limitations. I don't think I felt outrage as much as anxiety and what seemed a reasoned-out worry.
This still leaves the question of what concrete things I can do. And the truth is, for me, not much that I can honestly say I feel would have impact. And as http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-to-stay-sane-in-era-non-stop-outrage/ (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-to-stay-sane-in-era-non-stop-outrage/)
and a great article Marco Bronx linked to discussed, my obsessive consumption of hype-media was only me eating the troll-bait.
So I took action, namely purging my youtube suggestions (which is where I was getting most of the crap I was watching). In anyone else is interested, this involved two steps:
1. Deleting the videos I have watched from my history, and then turning off history creation.
2. Using the "not interested" button to remove any remaining videos that show up as suggestions next to the videos I am watching (mainly music while I work).
I will make sure to get a copy of "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k" - thanks @goateeman for the suggestion.
Once again thank you all for your input.
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If you're looking for some good news to read try here: www.goodnewsnetwork.org
Also, I count with what someone said above about unfollowing everyone on Facebook. I did it a year or two ago and have a blank newsfeed. It's glorious! But I can still check in with particular friends or groups when I want to.
Try reading about the eradication of polio. That gave me an optimism boost the other day!
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I'm a generally optimistic person, but I've also been struggling with this ever since the election. I feel pessimistic and cynical about the future of my country in a way that I'm not used to.
One thing that helps is I've cut way back on social media since the election, pruning my follow lists except for family and friends. I still read the news, because I want to know what's going on in the world, but I've put strict limits on how much a part of my life I'm willing to let it become. It really does improve my day-to-day mood to not be constantly bombarded with this stuff.
Like others said, I'm trying to be more politically active, calling and e-mailing my representatives more often. I have to remind myself that I can't take the whole weight of the world on my shoulders. But it helps my mood to know that I'm doing the things I can do.
Something else about this election is that it's really given me motivation to get to FIRE, and maybe to build up my stash a little bit beyond what I'll personally need to live off. The way I see it, it opens up options for me to help my friends if they ever need it, and that ability makes me feel good. Worst case, I'll be more of a philanthropist post-retirement and donate the surplus.
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I slipped into depression for a bit after the election. Many of us did. However with time most of us have realized that this is temporary. The power will shift back and the damage will be fixed. Just save as much as possible, invest smartly and you'll rise above it. Financial freedom isolates you from most of the political fallout. Things only swing so far before the people revolt in mass. It's going to be ok.
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Some really great thoughts in here, and some great articles too; thanks for the links, folks.
I've been struggling too, partly because I already see abuse, injustice, suffering, and misery rising around me, and, honestly, partly because I hope to FI and possibly RE this year, but our economy is in a state of unprecedented uncertainty, because we are in new political territory. So my mathematical projections may no longer be valid, and it's impossible to predict the (short-term) future in such a chaotic system.
I get my optimism boosts by tearing myself away from the screen and doing concrete things in the real world. Playing with the dog and cat. Talking to a friend. Cooking a good meal. And some small political engagement things, like subscribing to newspapers I feel need support, and starting monthly donations to charities I believe in.
The trick right now is that many of us feel both helpless and responsible, which squeezes us between a rock and a hard place. We aren't entirely helpless. We are only partly responsible, as one ant in an anthill of millions.
For me, the key is acceptance. There has always been suffering and injustice. In many areas, there's more now. People have always been attacked and killed. In many areas, it's happening more now. So there's an uptick, yes, but it's not like things were perfect before. I hate that it's increasing, but I also see the increasing levels of civic engagement, of galvanization, of previously passive people coming together in common causes. It's a complex situation, and it's not all bad.
The hardest thing is to accept that people will suffer and even die now who likely would not have had the election gone differently. And there's nothing we can do to stop that from being true; we can't save everyone now. Once you do accept that, though, it becomes easier to figure out how to strategize and take action to make things better, eventually, in the future.
And once you accept your limited level of control, it becomes easier to let go of some of that sense of responsibility, and to devote more attention to self-care without guilt. Gotta put your own oxygen mask on first. You're no good to anyone when you're overwhelmed.
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Thank you all very much for your comments and suggestions. I've been doing a lot of thinking about this over the past few days, inspired in large part by what you wrote and the articles you linked to (and some that they linked to).
I forgot to mention in the OP that up to the election, I was on a fairly low-information diet and had been for a few years ever since reading 4HWW, where I first heard of the concept. And indeed, in that time, I enjoyed the benefits of the diet and the realization that politics was mostly "same shit, different day."
But somehow in the lead-up to the election I got sucked into the coverage, and the shit-storm thenceforth has only captivated me more. I think that I felt that the current situation is so far from business as usual, with levels of vitriol and disregard for precedent or basic human dignity, that it was perhaps some "new shit."
The stoic approach, as the article by http://modernstoicism.com/on-outrage-trump-is-the-obstacle-and-the-way-by-marco-bronx/
pointed out, is to take a longer view, as well as to realize my limitations. I don't think I felt outrage as much as anxiety and what seemed a reasoned-out worry.
This still leaves the question of what concrete things I can do. And the truth is, for me, not much that I can honestly say I feel would have impact. And as http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-to-stay-sane-in-era-non-stop-outrage/ (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-to-stay-sane-in-era-non-stop-outrage/)
and a great article Marco Bronx linked to discussed, my obsessive consumption of hype-media was only me eating the troll-bait.
So I took action, namely purging my youtube suggestions (which is where I was getting most of the crap I was watching). In anyone else is interested, this involved two steps:
1. Deleting the videos I have watched from my history, and then turning off history creation.
2. Using the "not interested" button to remove any remaining videos that show up as suggestions next to the videos I am watching (mainly music while I work).
I will make sure to get a copy of "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k" - thanks @goateeman for the suggestion.
Once again thank you all for your input.
Shmadas, glad you are getting value out of suggestions on this thread. It seems that the most immediate goal was finding ways to feel reasonably good (or better) from day to day, to function while knowing an appropriate amount about political events, and to regulate feelings by determining how to regulate the flow of "news".
It looks like a secondary goal was to take responsible action regarding political events. For now you seem to be turning away from that because you don't feel there are concrete things you can do that "would have impact." Respectfully, I invite you to consider that there are probably a number of concrete things that would have good impact per minute relative to the size of one person in the world, and that a certain amount of finding and doing these actions could be terrific for your feelings.
Fwiw, there are moments when it is unclear what impact you can have. Don't drain yourself at such a time - just do some small amount that you can manage without damaging the other aspects of your life. But consider making an attempt, at least in some modest part of your day/week/month. I have done this many times. The results vary widely as far as outcome. But you are usually better off for trying. Also fwiw, there are TONS of concrete things to do, once you start looking.
The concrete things to do vary widely in how much impact they have and how predictable the effect is. It's rarely 100% predictable, but I guarantee you one thing: the 1% or 3% who get involved will determine the outcome. You are dozens of times more powerful than anyone who sits on their couch, just by simple ratios. If you're not sure what to do, replace 80% of your news reading with research on What to Do - you'll find ideas. Then pick one or more, and do them. Once you implement a 4 to 1 ratio of action to reading, you will feel better and in fact be powerful, relative to your size in the world.
The bigger the issue, the less certain your impact is, but the bigger the potential effect. IMHO both small and large things have similar effort-to-impact ratios; it's a matter of taste which area you should pick. To put it another way, you can feed a homeless guy or lobby Congress to fund a million apartments, they're both good things to do. You can donate to a local church or nonprofit that is supporting immigrants (a sanctuary church, a legal aid for DREAMERS group), shelter an undocumented worker, or you can call your Congressperson to tell them to urge the President to slow down ICE. The examples are intended as procedural examples, not policy suggestions, choose your own politics!
I started in a similar spot some years ago. I can point to highways whose location I personally affected, neighborhoods and stoplights that exist in their current form due to my associates and I, and list historical events I was directly involved in (omitting details in forum to preserve anonymity; PM me for details if you like). Get that action to news ratio in the proper gear and it will transform your life.
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Objectively, the world IS getting MUCH, MUCH better. Here are some facts that prove it, beyond any doubt:
Solar power is trending toward becoming majorly affordable:
(https://cdn0.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/2360806/solar_power.0.png)
People living in democracies is way, way up too:
(http://sundaymagazine.org/wp-content/uploads/percent-of-world-citizens-living-in-democracy-by-year.png)
Tyort1, really loved your whole post. Especially loved the two graphs above - they both told me things I did not know AT ALL - that the non-PV portions of solar cost have been substantially dropping, and the concept of anocracy. To me whole politics graph and the data effort behind it was really helpful.
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What is "anocracy"? Rule by the Anal-retentive?
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What is "anocracy"? Rule by the Anal-retentive?
Better than the anal expulsive party.
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Suppose we put colonies on the moon. That sounds like progress, but that graph would have more people back in the "colony" category, which would definitely look bad.
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Suppose we put colonies on the moon. That sounds like progress, but that graph would have more people back in the "colony" category, which would definitely look bad.
Right, and what if we end up with Belters on the moon that declare war on Earth, then they death from war will go up too!
This is fun! Hell, lets make up some more stuff that might happen in the future.
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Suppose we put colonies on the moon. That sounds like progress, but that graph would have more people back in the "colony" category, which would definitely look bad.
Right, and what if we end up with Belters on the moon that declare war on Earth, then they death from war will go up too!
This is fun! Hell, lets make up some more stuff that might happen in the future.
Mars will be whoopin' some Belter ass pretty soon! Even Fred Johnson will be running scared. :P
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Consider yourselves boosted:
The number of millionaire households in America increased by 400,000 in 2016, reaching a record of 10.8 million, according to a new study.
Since the 2008 financial crisis, the number of millionaire households has grown every year, adding a total of 4 million millionaire households, according to Spectrem Group, the wealth research firm. The stats mean that more than one out of every 10 households in America is worth $1 million or more.
http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/markets/us-adds-400000-millionaire-households-setting-record/ar-BByBuHM?li=BBnbfcN
We Americans today are quite possibly the very luckiest bipeds this planet has ever seen.
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I'm not seeing how 10.8 million today is more than 10% of 140,000,000 households. Is one of my numbers not correct?
(Congrats to all you Millionaires, I'll be joining you one day)
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Apparently Census Bureau measures about 125 million households:
https://www.statista.com/statistics/183635/number-of-households-in-the-us/
So 10.8 million would be a little under 9%. If the 10.8 million is accurate.
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in my lifetime mobile phones came about , they got smaller and cheaper , more powerful , eventually holding a tv screen and a computer with an internet . The market for apps appeared from nowhere , blogs like MMM happened .
self driving trucks and cars might be commonplace soon , i could watch a film and get driven to london and probably get cheaper insurance because the hairless ape behind the wheel is the most common cause of accidents, all vehicles will record whats going on around them when on , most traffic police will become redundant and can be freed up to help to make neighbourhoods safe or lower taxes, emergency vehicles can be high speed and have roads cleared in advance. cycling will become easier because automatic cars will drive with proper space and speed limits . i can check work e-mail as i commute , maybe have video conferences with my team and chat about the jobs of the day .
single man drones might airlift people in mountain rescue or a&e situations .
drone technology means i can get parts for machines or PLC's delivered within a few hours to remote customer sites or a hot starbucks coffee at 6:30am to the patio.
Netflix and iTunes means i don't have cd's, vynal , tape or dvd's to get broken, go to land fill or waste resources in manufacture.
low resource business like blogs , U-tube , apps , games , music , all types of entertainment is still a growing market , getting better and broader and at small cost to the environment .
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Turn it off. This is why I pay zero attention to politics. Politics can only get you down as more and more people are so convinced only they are right and everyone else is wrong. it's a shame.
Yes! Turn off the news all together if you ask me. A while back there was a shooting in San Bernidino. I didn't know about it until 2-3 weeks after it happened. I realized I didn't need to know about it because it didn't effect me - and was just promoting hate and fear across the country. That's when I realized my decision to turn off the TV was awesome.
I have found the local township paper (as opposed to the big named regional paper) to be very informative, upbeat, and nearly every article effects me on some level. I read it occasionally - but not daily - probably weekly. There's some national news in it that I usually ignore.
I get the 5-day forcast from my cellphone in about 30 seconds instead of half of the weather with a cliff-hanger ever 5 minutes. Google maps has real time traffic these days (Wayz is still better though). If I was into sports I could get score and stat data on my phone in a short amount of time also. I'm surprised the TV news is still in business.