Mock Yourself *Just For Fun*

[Sojourner]

This one is actual words overheard.  Still kind of stings...

At the time, I lived alone in a fixer house that had been run down by years of destructive renters.  I refurbished that sorry ugly thing one DIY project at a time.  With improvements and market rise, the value increased from sub $100K to over 4X. 

Sad, but it turns out I was the only sibling of a large family to get through college, coming from a relatively poor upbringing.  A top ten school in my field.  After an early career of decent paying professional jobs, I had saved enough to be FI, no debt, did freelance work whenever I wanted, and lived cheaply...under $1K/mo as I recall.  Essentially Mustachian before MMM.  I loved it.  I felt very free.

One day at my parent's home I hear my younger sibling (who I thought looked up to me) speaking to my parents saying, "Ha ha...college?  Look where that got [me].  He's broke, living in that beat up house with no job and driving that junky truck."

I owned that junky truck and that house, in full.  My net worth was probably over $500K at the time.

[ketchup]

This one is actual words overheard.  Still kind of stings...

At the time, I lived alone in a fixer house that had been run down by years of destructive renters.  I refurbished that sorry ugly thing one DIY project at a time.  With improvements and market rise, the value increased from sub $100K to over 4X. 

Sad, but it turns out I was the only sibling of a large family to get through college, coming from a relatively poor upbringing.  A top ten school in my field.  After an early career of decent paying professional jobs, I had saved enough to be FI, no debt, did freelance work whenever I wanted, and lived cheaply...under $1K/mo as I recall.  Essentially Mustachian before MMM.  I loved it.  I felt very free.

One day at my parent's home I hear my younger sibling (who I thought looked up to me) speaking to my parents saying, "Ha ha...college?  Look where that got [me].  He's broke, living in that beat up house with no job and driving that junky truck."

I owned that junky truck and that house, in full.  My net worth was probably over $500K at the time.

Ouch.  That's a pretty bad one.  That would sting.

[Steve Ainslie]

I don't even have to imagine this one because my wife says it to my face,

"I'm not the leaving the house with you wearing that ratty t-shirt. You look like nobody loves you."

[Travis]

"I don't know why he drives through the night on his vacations? Just get a plane ticket, he's got the money."

"He wants to retire at 40 and grow a garden?  How unambitious.  He's going to be bored after 20 years of military excitement. He could just turn right around and get a government job."

"He makes 6 figures and rides his bike? It's hot out and he's going to get hit."

"He spends money like a Jew"


(all things said to my face)

[Hirondelle]

"You go to this cocktail night but she orders beer anyway. I'm sure she just does it because it's cheaper. Who on earth prefers pilsener over cocktails?"

[MissNancyPryor]

This one is actual words overheard.  Still kind of stings...

At the time, I lived alone in a fixer house that had been run down by years of destructive renters.  I refurbished that sorry ugly thing one DIY project at a time.  With improvements and market rise, the value increased from sub $100K to over 4X. 

Sad, but it turns out I was the only sibling of a large family to get through college, coming from a relatively poor upbringing.  A top ten school in my field.  After an early career of decent paying professional jobs, I had saved enough to be FI, no debt, did freelance work whenever I wanted, and lived cheaply...under $1K/mo as I recall.  Essentially Mustachian before MMM.  I loved it.  I felt very free.

One day at my parent's home I hear my younger sibling (who I thought looked up to me) speaking to my parents saying, "Ha ha...college?  Look where that got [me].  He's broke, living in that beat up house with no job and driving that junky truck."

I owned that junky truck and that house, in full.  My net worth was probably over $500K at the time.

Ouch.  That's a pretty bad one.  That would sting.

Or looking at it another way, "Yay!  Mom and Dad don't expect me to support them in old age!  Pffft!" (blows raspberry)

[SwordGuy]

Now that I think on it, when we moved into our new home in an upscale neighborhood, that backs up to a ritzy neighborhood, our new neighbors must have taken one look at our cars and exclaimed, "OMG!  The Beverly Hillbillies have moved next door!"

True story:

We have a crazy cat lady next door.   The house stinks of cat piss when you get within 15 feet of it.   And I don't mean the  "Honey, do you smell something?" level of stink.   It's more of a "Dear God!  Whoa!  Cat piss!" level.
And, if she leaves opens a window then invisible spheres of concentrated cat piss float into our yard and hit one like an invisible brick bat.   

So, we're getting our carport roof repaired and we've hired out the work.  I park my car on the street in front of her house so it's not in the way of the workmen.   

While they are there she comes out of her house and asks one of the workmen if she should call the police because the car is covered in bullet holes.    He does his best to keep a straight face and tells her, "No, ma'am, those aren't bullet holes, they are dents from hail stones."  (He knows the story about the cars.)

[Step37]

Actual line of questioning: “But you’ve paid off your mortgage... why on Earth do you still have those renters in the basement? Don’t you want the space to spread out? Doesn’t (husband) want a man cave? Don’t you want the place to yourselves?” *the horror*

Actually, I don’t mind collecting $1000/mo from quiet, pleasant people who occupy space I don’t need. We have enough. Space, things, everything.

[Hirondelle]

Actual line of questioning: “But you’ve paid off your mortgage... why on Earth do you still have those renters in the basement? Don’t you want the space to spread out? Doesn’t (husband) want a man cave? Don’t you want the place to yourselves?” *the horror*

Actually, I don’t mind collecting $1000/mo from quiet, pleasant people who occupy space I don’t need. We have enough. Space, things, everything.

But... but... mancaves are an essential necessity!

[PhilB]

Look at that guy in the shabby clothes going through the marked-down section in the supermarket.  It must be dreadful to be that poor.  And it looks like he came here by bike.

[FireLane]

"That guy could buy a big house and a flashy sports car, easily. Instead, he lives in a dinky little apartment and drives an old Honda with 200,000 miles on it. What's wrong with him? Doesn't he want to live a little?"

[Freedomin5]

"You shouldn't focus so much on making and saving money. You know you can't take it with you when you die, right? And you could die at any time. You never know, you could get hit by a bus tomorrow."

[Caroline PF]

I was at her house when she had a bunch of people over for a meal. Afterwards, I caught her fishing the disposable plastic cups out of the trashcan. She was going to wash and reuse them! She wasn't even embarrassed, and told everyone to save their cups for washing instead of throwing them away. I told her that she could afford to buy more disposable cups.