Maybe I screwed myself when I quit.

[poetdereves]

This is a feeling that I have had many times when the ish has hit the fan and I have decided to leave whatever job I was at in that moment. I don’t like being pushed around or doing meaningless work with no chance of upward movement, so I have left many jobs. Then, magically, I find something better EVERY TIME.

Reading through different sections about FU money, upsetting bosses, etc. on this blog has made me realize that this happens to a lot of others too, but I can’t really recall it not working out for posters  on here either.

Has anyone been screwed when they quit? Did finding a job ever become too difficult for any of you?? Is anyone still in debt/trouble for leaving?

I ask because I am always trying to convince my wife that she has the potential to make more, stay busy, and enjoy her job more than she does now. She’s optimistic in most areas of her life, but for some reason she doesn’t really accept the reality that she is pretty underpaid for her experience and education. I remind her all the time that a decent nest egg and a positive attitude opens up a lot of choices, but I want to be realistic and listen to people when they have had issues too. Just thought I would throw it out there and get a chance to hear some interesting stories!!

[netskyblue]

Well, that's what the interview process is for - determining whether the new job prospect would or would not be a good fit for you.  So unless you quit with no prospects, or somehow the job or company culture are grossly misrepresented in the interview, chances are good that a move on is going to be a good thing.

[MrMoneyMullet]

I'm not FI, but I'm about to quit a job where I'm very well paid for what I do, little stress, don't hate my job, and can work from home most of the time. So I might have a good story for you by this time next year, depending on how things pan out.

I'm able to do Coast FIRE and I have health insurance and some income as a member of US military reserves. I'm also terrified of waking up someday with plenty of money and the feeling that I wasted the best years of my life on a job I don't care about.

[Kepler]

I took ages to quit a terrible job once, in a very poor job market where I felt I needed to have something else lined up first, so I didn't give notice until I actually had another offer in hand.  The new job then ended up being much, much worse (which, frankly, would have been almost unimaginable when I was in the earlier role, but there I was...).  I walked out of the second job after three months without having even applied for anything else yet, although I did have severance pay to tide me over (why did I get severance after only being there for a few months? Wondering why the organisational culture was so awful, I had started poking around and found evidence that the CEO was cooking the books, and I handed the evidence over to the chair of the board along with my resignation letter: the chair agreed that, in the circumstances, severance was more appropriate than requiring me to work out my notice period...).  I fell straight into a new job that time, and was being paid by both places for several weeks.  That third job was not bad - and led to much better opportunities a couple years later.

But I certainly did feel, for a time, that I had screwed myself when I quit the first place...

[big_slacker]

I quit a solid easy job RIGHT as the dot com crash hit. I could have stayed in the old job and old town pretty much forever (the same people still work there today) Ended up going from a boring sysadmin job to what I thought was gonna be a better sysadmin job in the big city. That led to being unemployed, to loading pallets and driving trucks at a warehouse job. I actually kind of liked that warehouse job, but $6/hour SUCKED.

That was actually one of my great life lessons, it taught me that there is no such thing as job security as I had thought of it, only marketplace value. I got much better and more specialized since. During the last recession I switched jobs twice and doubled my income. So I screwed myself short term but as the saying goes you win or you learn.

[mozar]

Nope. People say that you'll get in trouble because they're scared and they buy into what society says. I don't know anyone (including myself) who made risky choices who is struggling or unhappy.

People live all kinds of lives, make money in all kinds of ways.

[AnnaGrowsAMustache]

I've quit a few jobs, because they were doing my head in, and it's always worked itself out. Sometimes you win, like I apparently have after quitting job in Nov and starting a new senior, well paid job tomorrow!

I've had some shitty, shitty jobs. I had one job baking at 3am in a 24 hour convenience store type of thing. It was filthy, the baked goods were absolute rubbish and it was 3am....... One night a drunken hooker came in with her drunken john and they had a huge brawl over services rendered. Police were called etc etc, but I distinctly remember standing in the kitchen of the store in the middle of a huge drama thinking that my job definitely sucked. And it was snowing. I was at university and would go from that to an 8am lecture. I don't think that was even the crappiest job I've ever had.

[soccerluvof4]

Think it depends on the person. Some people are just never happy, worry about what everyone around them makes and always thinks the company is screwing them so they will never find a job that is fulfilling because they have other issues going on. Others yea, look to advance if your in a career your being underpaid but until you land that job don't quit the one you have unless your in the financial position to do so. Like others said , most times it will work out but the time it doesn't can really screw you over so as with any major change in live do your research on the company, talk to other employees that work there and do the math to see if its really an improvement. The grass isn't always greener and sometimes you might end up over a septic tank if it is.

[BlueMR2]

Reading through different sections about FU money, upsetting bosses, etc. on this blog has made me realize that this happens to a lot of others too, but I can’t really recall it not working out for posters  on here either.

Has anyone been screwed when they quit? Did finding a job ever become too difficult for any of you?? Is anyone still in debt/trouble for leaving?

Those that it doesn't work out for generally just don't talk about it...  I've quit a few jobs.  I've always found something else eventually, but sometimes it's quick and sometimes it takes a long time.  And it's not always better.  I've taken a 50% pay cut just to get back to work after being out for several months.  My wife's experience has been even worse, finding it very hard to find replacement jobs (sometimes taking multiple years) often for lower pay and worse hours before being able to work back up only to repeat again.

[Slow&Steady]

I thought my 1st job out of college was okay but was just a stepping stone and after 2 years of being away from home, my husband and I decided it was time to move closer to home.  I found another job with a start date of Aug 08.  My old manager tried to keep me and told me that there were all these promising future roles for me, including his someday but the hubby really wanted to move closer to family and I had already accepted the offer.  The offer was a pay CUT but it was closer to family.  We packed up, put our house on the market and moved.

The new job started having me travel (3 weeks away 1 week home) within 6 months because the original work they hired me for was being cut drastically, the old house never sold so we put it up for rent (taking a $200/month loss), DH found a job in the new location and was then laid off due to the economy.  We ended moving again (while I was on a 3 week away stint) a year later BUT the company let me WFH because they didn't have an office in the new location but they did have a huge client with a corporate office 1 hour away.  We moved again a year later and I had to start reporting to an office again. I stayed with that company for EIGHT years and most of them included a wage freeze, so no pay raises.  Other years I fought hard to get a bump in title so that I could have a small bump in pay, the work was mostly unrewarding, career growth was pretty much non-existent, and we still have that damn house in the location of the 1st job (although refinanced now so that we don't take a loss every month).  If you look at my SS earnings from the years I worked there, I never reached the salary I had when I left the 1st job.  I try to remind myself that this is misleading because the 1st job included a lot of overtime, and my payroll deductions increased a lot during the 2nd job.

Meanwhile at the 1st job, my manager had moved on and the guy that I worked closest with has taken that role, I often wondered if it would have actually been mine if I would have stayed.  I finally stuck my neck out and found a new job in Sept of 15, I loved it there, the pay was not great but the benefits, flexibility, atmosphere, and career potential were awesome.  Until last summer when the company was bought out and it quickly became miserable, miserable enough that I reached out to company #2.  I did not end up back at company #2 but by staying there as long as I did and creating a great reputation for myself, when I did reach out they were willing to put in a good word for me for a job that was a reach at a different company.  So although I regretted that job change for many years, and probably lost a lot of money by staying there for that long, I grew my network by leaps and bounds while I was there and that helped me land the job I have today making way more money than I have ever made and hopefully will enjoy for many years to come. 

[MaxP0wer]

I quite literally just did this.  Quit a high paying but toxic to me work environment with some ideas and a few prospects but nothing set in stone.  It was 5 years overdue and it was affecting my personality and motivation greatly.  I have debt, a family, but also a healthy savings balance.  Since I left my stress level has decreased dramatically and I have been able to focus on paring down my list of ideas and attain some new skills in order to start a new chapter.  Going into the unknown is an amazing feeling to me.  I have a backup plan B, C, D, and E so I'm not worried.

[poetdereves]

OP here.

I’m enjoying hearing other people’s experiences! It seems that personality types play into this a lot. A lot of you didn’t really get better jobs right away, but you seemed optimistic about your possibilities in the future. I, like a lot of you, have quit jobs and been paid less for the next job I took. When I mentioned that I always got something better I didn’t necessarily mean that it paid better, but the hours, environment, or upward movement seemed more positive.

A big part of the work issue for me is that I thrive during change. If I could have picked something and stuck with it at the beginning of my 20’s I could possibly be further ahead financially, but until recently longevity hasn’t been my strong suit. My DW is the opposite. She would forego spontaneity for structure almost 100% of the time. She figures that if she has steady pay, good insurance and benefits, and doesn’t hate her bosses or coworkers she might as well stay. She’s definitely the more normal/balanced of the two of us.

I appreciate the comments about the grass not always being greener on the other side. I have a tendency to always try new things because “what if” is too prevalent in my thinking. It will probably bite me in the ass someday.

[Roadrunner53]

I worked for a large food research corporation for 18 years. They decided to move the operation and I could have moved with them but decided to stay. Kind of complicated situation. My Hub would have quit his job in an instant and we would have moved. My Mother, a widow, with no other children wouldn't consider moving and I really understood. She had been sick over the years and all her doctors and hospital were close by. I was very disappointed in losing that job. I couldn't find anything like that job and got a job in a hospital. It was the worst job of my life. I had to deal with patients and my coworkers. I came from a company with very deep pockets and the hospital was so bad I was interrogated for ordering a pair of scissors. I found out about a research company back in my town, applied for a job and did get it. They were supposed to send the offer in the mail and I waited and waited. So I took Monday off and called them and they said they thought I would have given my notice already! GRRRR!! So Monday morning I called in sick and Monday afternoon I gave my notice! I told them Friday was my last day! I despised the job and couldn't get out fast enough. They were nice enough and gave me a going away party on Friday. I left about 1 pm. Ran out the door. I did get my offer on Tuesday in over night mail! I felt like a rat giving so little notice but I just did not care! That was 2007 and I got laid off in 2011! Never to work again!

[Slow&Steady]

...I ask because I am always trying to convince my wife that she has the potential to make more, stay busy, and enjoy her job more than she does now. She’s optimistic in most areas of her life, but for some reason she doesn’t really accept the reality that she is pretty underpaid for her experience and education. I remind her all the time that a decent nest egg and a positive attitude opens up a lot of choices, but I want to be realistic and listen to people when they have had issues too. Just thought I would throw it out there and get a chance to hear some interesting stories!!

...My DW is the opposite. She would forego spontaneity for structure almost 100% of the time. She figures that if she has steady pay, good insurance and benefits, and doesn’t hate her bosses or coworkers she might as well stay. She’s definitely the more normal/balanced of the two of us.

I appreciate the comments about the grass not always being greener on the other side. I have a tendency to always try new things because “what if” is too prevalent in my thinking. It will probably bite me in the ass someday.

I would like to add that your experience as a male will NOT always be the same as your wife's experience as a female, depending on her field and the company.  Pushing for women to take the leap is important but so is 100% accepting and acknowledging that it will (most of the time) be harder for her to do what you (males) have done in the past.    It is 2018 and men and women in the workforce should be completely equal but we are not.  Women often (not always) have to fight a lot harder for what we do have in the workplace, if she feels that she is happy with what she has now, she may not want to put forth the extra energy it would take her to land a better job.  I often describe this as for every 1x energy a man puts forth to move up (at least in my field) it will take me 1.25x energy, sometimes it is worth the extra and sometimes I am happy enough with where I am that I don't want to exert that extra (especially since that extra usually comes in the form of me giving up more free/family time).  I actively practice letting go when it is a battle I KNOW I will not win, to conserve energy to fight the battles that I at least have a chance to win. 

[nemesis]

...
I ask because I am always trying to convince my wife that she has the potential to make more, stay busy, and enjoy her job more than she does now. She’s optimistic in most areas of her life, but for some reason she doesn’t really accept the reality that she is pretty underpaid for her experience and education. I remind her all the time that a decent nest egg and a positive attitude opens up a lot of choices, but I want to be realistic and listen to people when they have had issues too. Just thought I would throw it out there and get a chance to hear some interesting stories!!

Your wife reminds me of this - https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/trying-to-convince-someone-they-are-worth-so-much-more

I've never regretted leaving a job.  People are always amazed that I have the *perfect* job and then I leave and find something even better.  You have to keep progressing, or you will get stale and die. 

So far I've left several *perfect* jobs that I could have stayed on for life.  Each and every job after has been an amazing step up, not just financially but also life satisfaction and freedom. 

I might literally be the most satisfied employee in the world, but that doesn't mean I'll shut any potential doors that are open to me. Nothing lasts forever, and that includes "perfect jobs".