Ideas for gift suggestions to avoid junk

[Villanelle]

We have some people in our lives who will give us gifts, regardless of what we say.  Charity isn't sufficient, and some even refuse to do gift cards.

Like so many of you, I generally try to avoid junk, but that's especially true this year as we prepare for a big move and need to downsize.  Even our pantry and freezer are included in the downsizing, so many consumable gifts would end up wasted or given away. (That's not the worst thing, I suppose.)  Also, Im just a fairly picky eater.  Like, I drink tea so people tend to give me tea gifts, but it's usually herbal teas or fancy shit, and I like black tea. I want what I want, I guess.   

I know many are in similar positions, so I thought we could share ideas for gifts for those who want suggestions and insist on giving something. What are you putting on your Santa list? 

~I've floated Starbucks gift cards for DH, as that's a treat he likes but doesn't like paying for.  Hoping my mom and/or sister will jump on that. 
~I'm considering asking for a Massage Envy subscription or gift card or however that works.  (I know a non-chain place would probably be better and maybe more cost-effective, but that's harder for people to buy from across the country.)
~I might suggest to DH that he suggest to his mom that I'd love more of my favorite tea.  There's a pricey assam I like but won't splurge on.
~A Costco or Amazon gift card, though there's some gift card hesitation. 

What ideas are you pushing out to the dedicated gift-givers in your life?

[Sandi_k]

I have tried to figure out what I own and use, and which has gotten worn, dilapidated, or help together with duct tape. Consumables are also good. Some items I've enjoyed:

- L'Occitane Shea Butter foot creme. $28 per tube, but it solves my dry cuticles. I love it, it works, and I rarely am willing to buy it myself. ;)

- A new pullover sweater. I tend to wear mine until they look ragged and pilled. So I find a few, and add them to my Amazon wishlist.

- Music. I love music, and have great speakers. I prefer a lossless format, and DH got me software years ago where I can rip my CDs and turn them into FLAC files that sound amazing on the speakers. So I am requesting CDs these days, to expand my music library. (Owning them has been great when Apple changed iTunes, or when my laptop has died with the files on it).

- Slippers. I wear the hell out of them, and it's a good gift when they get shabby.

- I recently upgraded my 20 year old coffee grinder. DH found a burr grinder for me for my birthday, and it's a joy to use every morning: non-acidic coffee, quietly ground.

- Towels. We still have the towels from our wedding in 1997. I am beginning to replace them out, donating the old towels to our local animal shelter. It's a great gift.

- Pillows. Our pillows are old and flat, so we've put new pillows on the list.

- Sheets. Our fitted sheets on three different sets have ripped this year, so we added some sheet sets to the gift list.

- Decent silicone cooking utensils. Again, ours are 26+ years old.

- Bakeware. My brother and I both like to bake, so I asked for a new set of insulated two-layer loaf pans, muffin pans, and cookie sheets. Plus cookie scoops. All of my stuff is scratched and gouged and burned and no longer "non stick."

It's almost like a wedding registry! ;)

[ixtap]

MIL will.get gifts whether we like it or not and if she chooses, it is invariably not. If we think of something it would be kind of nice to have during the year, we keep a list. We didn't put anything on the list this year :(

In the past, we have asked for:
-specific tools (we send links if it is really specific)
-frying pans
-a stuffed animal related to our hobby (she failed so hilarious we kept it for laughs)

We have also asked for TurboTax, but they seem to think that is a joke. Don't know why, given everything we request is practical!

My family generally gets us something warm. Mom has been known to knit hats or socks for everyone, but lately she usually buys them.

For one SIL, we give the family a state park pass. For the other, SIL and my brother, we generally give games until the kids stop enjoying game nights and/or move out.

My parents have expectations: I must supply my father his black Twizzlers and Mom wants a pocket calendar along with my help writing in birthdays and anniversaries.

[Metalcat]

I have some persistent gift giving in laws and I've trained them to only buy me Ice Breaker merino wool socks.

Otherwise I've convinced everyone in my family not to give us gifts, except my step mom who always gives me a frozen tourtiere made with local lamb (French Canadian meat pie) and a jar of sauerkraut from her local farmers market.

I have no idea how this tourtiere and sauerkraut tradition started, but I'm cool with it. My step mom is an insanely good cook.

[Morning Glory]

Can you ask them to delay the gifts until after the move?  Like if  your pillows (or towels or whatever) are due for replacement they can buy you new pillows and have them shipped to the new place, and you can toss the old ones when you move instead of packing them.

[curious_george]

I have trained people to preferably give me money.

If I can't convince them to give me money then gift cards.

If gift cards don't work then it is all consumables or clothing.

For example - I almost exclusively wear T-shirts and have never once bought a t shirt in my life for example, because other people have supplied me with a lifetime supply of t shirts.

Other things I like - bags, hiking/outdoor gear, tools, books.

Sometimes - very rarely - video games.

Generally though - money. Everyone knows I have a borderline unhealthy love of money. :D 

[Blue Skies]

Activities - ask for tickets to specific things, a show you want to see, a concert, a museum, season tickets to a sporting event?
A date night - gift cards to a nice restaurant you wouldn't normally splurge on?  an offer to watch your kids so you can go out? 

[MaybeBabyMustache]

We don't exchange gifts, but do agree to meet up for experiences (this will depend on your location/proximity to each other). For example, for a combo Mother's Day/birthday gift, my sister & I are doing a half marathon with our mom, and then enjoying a few days together in Napa. The time together is a gift, and I'll also use points to pay for the hotel stay. Even if the event isn't timed perfectly around the holidays, my family is super content to do experiences.

My mom & sister are closer together, so have done things like high tea, pedicures, more expensive workout classes, etc.

Is it an option to meet one of those folks for a nice(r) meal or an outing, and have them treat you as your gift?

[Tasse]

Don't know if I'll get it, but this year I asked for interior detailing for my car. I don't care enough to clean it myself, but it would be nice for the rare occasions I offer someone a ride.

I've often taken my (much younger) siblings for an outing as their gift--each kid gets to pick one place to go, with a budget paid by me, plus a treat. Two kids banded together for laser tag, one took me to the bookstore plus candle-smelling excursion, and one just wanted to play with the chihuahua puppy at those highly questionable mall puppy stores. This year we're trying to take them all on a single big outing--any ideas on how to satisfy the 12yo boy and 16yo girl at the same time are welcome...

[tygertygertyger]

Many of mine are the same as what's listed above: socks, tools, etc.

But I also put things on there that my partner and I and our dog would like:

*$$ towards a pricey county dog park pass (we use it throughout the year, and it includes 5 different parks)
*stuffed animals/toys for our dog (that we'd never spend money on, but he'll like)
*10 pass to a local climbing wall
*home projects - 1 (gift card to a store, ie menards gift card, because we want ceiling fans)
*home projects - 2 (supplies for a project we want to do. i learned about "painting" windows to achieve a fake stained glass look... here is a list of items i'd like them to buy me)
*cooking items / gardening items i'd never buy myself

[Bumblebee7]

I really like Joshua Becker's list of 99 Clutter-free gift ideas:

https://www.becomingminimalist.com/clutter-free-gift-ideas/


He also has a nice article on how to encourage your family and friends to gift experiences, it might be worth a try!

https://www.becomingminimalist.com/how-to-gift-experiences/

I often find that minimalism and mustachianism go hand in hand, especially when it comes to excessive consumerism.

[hooplady]

Don't know if I'll get it, but this year I asked for interior detailing for my car. I don't care enough to clean it myself, but it would be nice for the rare occasions I offer someone a ride.

I hope you get this! I can't count the number of times I asked for car detailing or something else practical, and got...jewelry.

[Dollar Slice]

I always have the same problem. I try to ask for consumables (not necessarily food, but also just things that wear out in a relatively short time: socks, slippers, shoes, sheets, etc.) and experiences (concert tickets, museum memberships, etc). Bonus if it's something you can do together: parents are suckers for the "but what I REALLY want is to spend time together as a family... can you just take us (to dinner/a show/ice skating/bowling/whatever-the-fuck) for the holidays? I would love that."

[La Bibliotecaria Feroz]

Don't know if I'll get it, but this year I asked for interior detailing for my car. I don't care enough to clean it myself, but it would be nice for the rare occasions I offer someone a ride.

I hope you get this! I can't count the number of times I asked for car detailing or something else practical, and got...jewelry.

My dad got this for my mom one time and she loved it! It has been on my list but no one has bought it for me. Sniff.

[AMandM]

I have a dear, dear relative in whose mind a gift is not a gift unless it's something special, a treat, an indulgence or pampering. In her mind, something practical doesn't count, even if it's expensive, because it's basically a need that the recipient has to fulfill anyway. And she really vastly prefers that it be something tangible, so that she can see the pleasure when it's unwrapped. But as I said she is a dear, dear relative, so we try to think of things we'd like that fit her criteria. We consider the effort as part of our gift to her.

Subscription to a print magazine
Tickets to a show
Fruit-of-the-month subscription
Plants (house or outdoor)--to be delivered after your move
Tickets to a sporting event

[Kris]

I have a dear, dear relative in whose mind a gift is not a gift unless it's something special, a treat, an indulgence or pampering. In her mind, something practical doesn't count, even if it's expensive, because it's basically a need that the recipient has to fulfill anyway. And she really vastly prefers that it be something tangible, so that she can see the pleasure when it's unwrapped. But as I said she is a dear, dear relative, so we try to think of things we'd like that fit her criteria. We consider the effort as part of our gift to her.

Subscription to a print magazine
Tickets to a show
Fruit-of-the-month subscription
Plants (house or outdoor)--to be delivered after your move
Tickets to a sporting event

I have people like that, too. And for those people, one of the things I ask for is fancy soaps. They satisfies their need to buy something special, and it’s something that I need anyway and can use up. Sometimes the soaps are really nice and it is a pleasure to use them. Sometimes I don’t really like the scent, but I just power through and use them anyway. And I rarely have to buy soap now! :)

[ixtap]

I have a dear, dear relative in whose mind a gift is not a gift unless it's something special, a treat, an indulgence or pampering. In her mind, something practical doesn't count, even if it's expensive, because it's basically a need that the recipient has to fulfill anyway. And she really vastly prefers that it be something tangible, so that she can see the pleasure when it's unwrapped. But as I said she is a dear, dear relative, so we try to think of things we'd like that fit her criteria. We consider the effort as part of our gift to her.

Subscription to a print magazine
Tickets to a show
Fruit-of-the-month subscription
Plants (house or outdoor)--to be delivered after your move
Tickets to a sporting event

I have people like that, too. And for those people, one of the things I ask for is fancy soaps. They satisfies their need to buy something special, and it’s something that I need anyway and can use up. Sometimes the soaps are really nice and it is a pleasure to use them. Sometimes I don’t really like the scent, but I just power through and use them anyway. And I rarely have to buy soap now! :)

MIL and Mom will get us a practical gift, but don't like to give us money because we will be so darn practical with it. At least with the practical gift, there is something to unwrap.

It's too bad. What I really really want is the cash flow to buy Ibonds and make Roth IRA contributions without moving things around. Just a teensy little check...

[AMandM]

I have some persistent gift giving in laws and I've trained them to only buy me Ice Breaker merino wool socks.

Otherwise I've convinced everyone in my family not to give us gifts, except my step mom who always gives me a frozen tourtiere made with local lamb (French Canadian meat pie) and a jar of sauerkraut from her local farmers market.

I have no idea how this tourtiere and sauerkraut tradition started, but I'm cool with it. My step mom is an insanely good cook.

One year I gave our pastor a homemade tourtiere, figuring he probably already got lots of sweet stuff. Bingo! It's become a tradition. Now he starts reminding me about it in early December.

[hooplady]

I do have one suggestion. A couple of years ago my sister received a gift of Storyworth. Over the next year she received prompts via email for her to tell her full life's story, and I and her kids were copied. At the end they provide an actual hardcopy book. It was a fun process for all of us and the resulting book takes up little space.

[MaybeBabyMustache]

Don't know if I'll get it, but this year I asked for interior detailing for my car. I don't care enough to clean it myself, but it would be nice for the rare occasions I offer someone a ride.

I've often taken my (much younger) siblings for an outing as their gift--each kid gets to pick one place to go, with a budget paid by me, plus a treat. Two kids banded together for laser tag, one took me to the bookstore plus candle-smelling excursion, and one just wanted to play with the chihuahua puppy at those highly questionable mall puppy stores. This year we're trying to take them all on a single big outing--any ideas on how to satisfy the 12yo boy and 16yo girl at the same time are welcome...

No idea if a movie would satisfy the taste of both, but a movie followed by a trip to the froyo shop? Or, bowling? Top Golf?

[Villanelle]

Oh, good suggestions.  In addition to tea, I could tell DH to suggest that MIL get me some fancy hand lotions or creams.  I'm always so, so dry in the winter.  I use nipple cream when it gets terrible. (I know, that sounds weird, but it works better than anything else I've ever tried.  Just takes a minutes to soften enough with body heat so it can be spread and rubbed in.)  But fancy hand cream would get used up and still might feel special enough for her gift-buying standards.  Thanks!

I do have one suggestion. A couple of years ago my sister received a gift of Storyworth. Over the next year she received prompts via email for her to tell her full life's story, and I and her kids were copied. At the end they provide an actual hardcopy book. It was a fun process for all of us and the resulting book takes up little space.

I've thought about doing Storyworth for my parents.  I worry that they will feel like is is a "since you'll probably die soon, we want to get this stiff recorded" gift, but I would really like to have it.  It would be more of a gift for myself, really.  If I can find the right messaging, I may do this. 

[Metalcat]

Oh, good suggestions.  In addition to tea, I could tell DH to suggest that MIL get me some fancy hand lotions or creams.  I'm always so, so dry in the winter.  I use nipple cream when it gets terrible. (I know, that sounds weird, but it works better than anything else I've ever tried.  Just takes a minutes to soften enough with body heat so it can be spread and rubbed in.)  But fancy hand cream would get used up and still might feel special enough for her gift-buying standards.  Thanks!

I do have one suggestion. A couple of years ago my sister received a gift of Storyworth. Over the next year she received prompts via email for her to tell her full life's story, and I and her kids were copied. At the end they provide an actual hardcopy book. It was a fun process for all of us and the resulting book takes up little space.

I've thought about doing Storyworth for my parents.  I worry that they will feel like is is a "since you'll probably die soon, we want to get this stiff recorded" gift, but I would really like to have it.  It would be more of a gift for myself, really.  If I can find the right messaging, I may do this.

If you have super dry skin."fancy" creams can actually make it worse because they're primarily "fancy" due to perfumes, which are almost universally irritants to most people's skin. They also tend to be seriously over packaged, so creates a lot more plastic waste compared to a giant $6 bottle of Vaseline Intensive Care cream, or whatever equivalent agrees with your skin most.

Unless you mean "fancy" as in really high end medicinal style creams that you can get from dermatology/plastic surgery offices, which have higher concentrations of active ingredients and tend to be scent free.

[Metalcat]

I have some persistent gift giving in laws and I've trained them to only buy me Ice Breaker merino wool socks.

Otherwise I've convinced everyone in my family not to give us gifts, except my step mom who always gives me a frozen tourtiere made with local lamb (French Canadian meat pie) and a jar of sauerkraut from her local farmers market.

I have no idea how this tourtiere and sauerkraut tradition started, but I'm cool with it. My step mom is an insanely good cook.

One year I gave our pastor a homemade tourtiere, figuring he probably already got lots of sweet stuff. Bingo! It's become a tradition. Now he starts reminding me about it in early December.

Amazing.

At my clinic we used to get, no joke, like 100 lbs of sweets each December for a staff of 8. It was insane. I wasn't eating sugar at the time so I just found it annoying. One lab sent us a cheese plate and I was always over the moon for that.

That actually gives me an idea, I might start asking for fancy cheese now from people who absolutely insist on giving me gifts. Everyone knows I absolutely love good cheese.

[Josiecat22222]

@Metalcat, I am so with you on the savory vs sweet preference!!  For the last few years instead of cookie plates for my friends and neighbors at the holidays, I make a batch of sausage balls, mini biscuits and cheese crisps.  That way there is actual food in there people can eat for breakfast/snack etc as opposed to piling on the to overabundance of sugary treats.

[MayDay]

Things on my, my H, or my teen childrens' lists this year (we all struggle with the same thing):

Fleece lined leggings. Athleta has them, quite life changing if you live somewhere freezing and like leggings.

New Bluetooth headphones. Maybe we are especially abusive but they seem to last ~2 years of heavy use before getting lost or worn out

Two of us want new hooded sweatshirts to replace worn out hooded sweatshirt.

A new sweater to replace one that's been mended many times

New black boots to replace worn out ones

Quick release hose connectors for power washers- expensive so good for several years. You need a couple more next year too! (I use them on regular garden hoses)

1 cup glass prep bowls with measuring cups lines from pampered chef (if these exist from a non-MLM source someone tell me but I've searched and can't find them)

As you can see it's mostly stuff we already own that's worn out. But we don't tell the gift giver that if it's someone who wants to give fancy/gifty things. We just say "I've had my eye on these fancy ____ and would really love to get it as a gift".

[PMG]

The past several years I’ve sent evergreen centerpieces to my Grandmother. Big hit. It is more expensive than my usual gifts but she and visiting family members always talk about it and seem to get a lot of joy from it and it lasts for much of the holiday season. She removes the flowers as they fade and rearranges it and adds in little colorful things.  If I lived closer to family I think I’d make centerpieces or small swags as gifts.

Almost everyone else is getting small packets of roasted cocoa beans to brew like coffee and a handful of truffles in a little pretty gift bag.  A handful of people are getting other small items specific to them added in.

My spouse and I seem to give each other food related gifts. Last year I got him a little countertop hydroponic herb garden. This year I got him more growing pods for it. He’s also getting a tortilla press.

For the toddler… we’re still figuring it out.

We do celebrate many winter holidays and often have a small gift for each. Christmas Eve, Day, New Years Eve, Orthodox Christmas.  As the kid gets older I expect those gifts to be craft and activities to help keep them engaged. This year I got a little felt and velcro Christmas tree I plan to give them Thanksgiving weekend and let them decorate and play. Will repeat it again next year. 

We got Christmas Pjs very early this year, during the first cold snap. We all needed new pjs so it worked well.

[Arbitrage]

I am so over gifts.  I did convince my brothers a couple of years ago that the practice of shipping each other useless crap a couple of times a year just to check a box was no longer necessary - we're in our 40s and 50s for cripes' sake, and we can buy ourselves what we want.

Biggest peeve left is that my mother, and particularly her husband, are still obsessed with gifts.  They already have way too much crap, so much that they can't use multiple rooms, and the garage, and their basement, of their giant house because of extra, unused crap.  Nevertheless, the expectation is still that I need to figure out some "meaningful thing" to buy them every few months (Mother's Day, birthday 1, birthday 2, Christmas, etc). 

They, of course, pepper us with a bunch of stuff we don't need at the big holidays.  Sometimes the gift is ok, but many times it's just more stuff I don't need or want.

Gifts for kids, sure.  For grown-ass adults, just enough already. 

Ok, rant over.  For these people, I'm trying to buy things like gift cards for restaurants, as their only interests are food, travel, and church. 

[Josiecat22222]

@Arbitrage- I'm getting my father (who insists on a gift exchange, despite both of us being FI and retired) a gift card for American Airlines because he and his wife like travel.  I may look to see if they have passes for the first class lounge instead for this year. 

[Villanelle]

Oh, good suggestions.  In addition to tea, I could tell DH to suggest that MIL get me some fancy hand lotions or creams.  I'm always so, so dry in the winter.  I use nipple cream when it gets terrible. (I know, that sounds weird, but it works better than anything else I've ever tried.  Just takes a minutes to soften enough with body heat so it can be spread and rubbed in.)  But fancy hand cream would get used up and still might feel special enough for her gift-buying standards.  Thanks!

I do have one suggestion. A couple of years ago my sister received a gift of Storyworth. Over the next year she received prompts via email for her to tell her full life's story, and I and her kids were copied. At the end they provide an actual hardcopy book. It was a fun process for all of us and the resulting book takes up little space.

I've thought about doing Storyworth for my parents.  I worry that they will feel like is is a "since you'll probably die soon, we want to get this stiff recorded" gift, but I would really like to have it.  It would be more of a gift for myself, really.  If I can find the right messaging, I may do this.

If you have super dry skin."fancy" creams can actually make it worse because they're primarily "fancy" due to perfumes, which are almost universally irritants to most people's skin. They also tend to be seriously over packaged, so creates a lot more plastic waste compared to a giant $6 bottle of Vaseline Intensive Care cream, or whatever equivalent agrees with your skin most.

Unless you mean "fancy" as in really high end medicinal style creams that you can get from dermatology/plastic surgery offices, which have higher concentrations of active ingredients and tend to be scent free.

Any chance you--or anyone-- know of any creams that would satisfy MIL's need for luxury (which means they can't be cheap) while still be great at doing the thing a cream is actually supposed to do?  I don't usually go fancy (which is how I ended up with nipple cream in my moisturizing arsenal).  Even if something "fancy" isn't 100% the best, I could plop it next to the bathroom sink and use it during the day, saving the truly good stuff for after shower and before bed. 

[Morning Glory]

Oh, good suggestions.  In addition to tea, I could tell DH to suggest that MIL get me some fancy hand lotions or creams.  I'm always so, so dry in the winter.  I use nipple cream when it gets terrible. (I know, that sounds weird, but it works better than anything else I've ever tried.  Just takes a minutes to soften enough with body heat so it can be spread and rubbed in.)  But fancy hand cream would get used up and still might feel special enough for her gift-buying standards.  Thanks!

I do have one suggestion. A couple of years ago my sister received a gift of Storyworth. Over the next year she received prompts via email for her to tell her full life's story, and I and her kids were copied. At the end they provide an actual hardcopy book. It was a fun process for all of us and the resulting book takes up little space.

I've thought about doing Storyworth for my parents.  I worry that they will feel like is is a "since you'll probably die soon, we want to get this stiff recorded" gift, but I would really like to have it.  It would be more of a gift for myself, really.  If I can find the right messaging, I may do this.

If you have super dry skin."fancy" creams can actually make it worse because they're primarily "fancy" due to perfumes, which are almost universally irritants to most people's skin. They also tend to be seriously over packaged, so creates a lot more plastic waste compared to a giant $6 bottle of Vaseline Intensive Care cream, or whatever equivalent agrees with your skin most.

Unless you mean "fancy" as in really high end medicinal style creams that you can get from dermatology/plastic surgery offices, which have higher concentrations of active ingredients and tend to be scent free.

Any chance you--or anyone-- know of any creams that would satisfy MIL's need for luxury (which means they can't be cheap) while still be great at doing the thing a cream is actually supposed to do?  I don't usually go fancy (which is how I ended up with nipple cream in my moisturizing arsenal).  Even if something "fancy" isn't 100% the best, I could plop it next to the bathroom sink and use it during the day, saving the truly good stuff for after shower and before bed.

Vani cream. I don't like it because it's too sticky but a bunch of people I know with skin conditions swear by it. It's expensive too.

[jeninco]

Things on my, my H, or my teen childrens' lists this year (we all struggle with the same thing):

Fleece lined leggings. Athleta has them, quite life changing if you live somewhere freezing and like leggings.

New Bluetooth headphones. Maybe we are especially abusive but they seem to last ~2 years of heavy use before getting lost or worn out

Two of us want new hooded sweatshirts to replace worn out hooded sweatshirt.

A new sweater to replace one that's been mended many times

New black boots to replace worn out ones

Quick release hose connectors for power washers- expensive so good for several years. You need a couple more next year too! (I use them on regular garden hoses)

1 cup glass prep bowls with measuring cups lines from pampered chef (if these exist from a non-MLM source someone tell me but I've searched and can't find them)

As you can see it's mostly stuff we already own that's worn out. But we don't tell the gift giver that if it's someone who wants to give fancy/gifty things. We just say "I've had my eye on these fancy ____ and would really love to get it as a gift".

I just use pyrex measuring cups -- they have the lines on them, and I have them in 1, 2, 4, and 8-cup sizes. I use them daily at least.

My DH got me brass snap-couplings for the houses as a house-warming gift. It was one of the sweetest gifts!

[Kris]

Things on my, my H, or my teen childrens' lists this year (we all struggle with the same thing):

Fleece lined leggings. Athleta has them, quite life changing if you live somewhere freezing and like leggings.

New Bluetooth headphones. Maybe we are especially abusive but they seem to last ~2 years of heavy use before getting lost or worn out

Two of us want new hooded sweatshirts to replace worn out hooded sweatshirt.

A new sweater to replace one that's been mended many times

New black boots to replace worn out ones

Quick release hose connectors for power washers- expensive so good for several years. You need a couple more next year too! (I use them on regular garden hoses)

1 cup glass prep bowls with measuring cups lines from pampered chef (if these exist from a non-MLM source someone tell me but I've searched and can't find them)

As you can see it's mostly stuff we already own that's worn out. But we don't tell the gift giver that if it's someone who wants to give fancy/gifty things. We just say "I've had my eye on these fancy ____ and would really love to get it as a gift".

I just use pyrex measuring cups -- they have the lines on them, and I have them in 1, 2, 4, and 8-cup sizes. I use them daily at least.

Me, too. Those things are awesome. My largest one has a silicone lid, too. Very handy.

[nereo]

National park season pass

[kpetar]

Make a charitable donation in the recipient's name to a cause they care about.

[Metalcat]

Oh, good suggestions.  In addition to tea, I could tell DH to suggest that MIL get me some fancy hand lotions or creams.  I'm always so, so dry in the winter.  I use nipple cream when it gets terrible. (I know, that sounds weird, but it works better than anything else I've ever tried.  Just takes a minutes to soften enough with body heat so it can be spread and rubbed in.)  But fancy hand cream would get used up and still might feel special enough for her gift-buying standards.  Thanks!

I do have one suggestion. A couple of years ago my sister received a gift of Storyworth. Over the next year she received prompts via email for her to tell her full life's story, and I and her kids were copied. At the end they provide an actual hardcopy book. It was a fun process for all of us and the resulting book takes up little space.

I've thought about doing Storyworth for my parents.  I worry that they will feel like is is a "since you'll probably die soon, we want to get this stiff recorded" gift, but I would really like to have it.  It would be more of a gift for myself, really.  If I can find the right messaging, I may do this.

If you have super dry skin."fancy" creams can actually make it worse because they're primarily "fancy" due to perfumes, which are almost universally irritants to most people's skin. They also tend to be seriously over packaged, so creates a lot more plastic waste compared to a giant $6 bottle of Vaseline Intensive Care cream, or whatever equivalent agrees with your skin most.

Unless you mean "fancy" as in really high end medicinal style creams that you can get from dermatology/plastic surgery offices, which have higher concentrations of active ingredients and tend to be scent free.

Any chance you--or anyone-- know of any creams that would satisfy MIL's need for luxury (which means they can't be cheap) while still be great at doing the thing a cream is actually supposed to do?  I don't usually go fancy (which is how I ended up with nipple cream in my moisturizing arsenal).  Even if something "fancy" isn't 100% the best, I could plop it next to the bathroom sink and use it during the day, saving the truly good stuff for after shower and before bed.

Anything from a dermatology or plastic surgery clinic. They have these ultra fancy lines of products that are very pretty, but actually well formulated and not just crap soaked in perfume.

[nereo]

^^
Anyone else read Fight Club?

[Just Joe]

Any chance you--or anyone-- know of any creams that would satisfy MIL's need for luxury (which means they can't be cheap) while still be great at doing the thing a cream is actually supposed to do?  I don't usually go fancy (which is how I ended up with nipple cream in my moisturizing arsenal).  Even if something "fancy" isn't 100% the best, I could plop it next to the bathroom sink and use it during the day, saving the truly good stuff for after shower and before bed.

My male coworker swears udder creme is the best thing for his hands... That could be hilarious for Christmas depending on your people.

[GuitarStv]

^^
Anyone else read Fight Club?

I remember being really taken with the idea of selling rich people their own fat back to them when I read it at an impressionable age.  :P

[ixtap]

Thanks for keeping this on our mind. We decided last night that it would be nice to have a Bluetooth smart plug (not easy to find one that doesn't require wifi) to turn off the Starlink at will. We will just use a power strip for now and I sent MIL a link to the smart plug we want. We will move the set up to a less obtrusive location once we have the smart plug.

[Photograph 51]

I've told people the best gift they can give me is a healthy planet to live on.  I then give specific suggestions for how they can help achieve this, i.e. go vegan, stop flying, stop using air conditioning, contact their elected officials.  One time when I was growing up, I told my parents this was what I wanted, so they bought me a book on the environment.  I guess they were trying, but they were still stuck in consumerist thinking when the whole point was to reduce consumerism and if I wanted a book I had a library card. 

Now, when I tell people that I want a healthy planet, they just change the subject and later they ask my daughter what they should get me.  She responds with something she wants, knowing that I will give it to her.  I'll be like, "why did someone give us a toaster?  We don't need a toaster; we can just eat bread how it is."  Then she'll be like, "I like toast.  We need a toaster."

[Dicey]

Postage stamps. One year I went to the USPS website and found so many cute styles, I spent a fortune on "Forever" stamps. For my caffeine-loving walking partner, I got coffee stamps. For my cousin, I found commemorative stamps for someone with her same name. "Love" stamps are easy, as are "Thank You" stamps. My (now) 99 year-old friend loves cardinals, so I found some bird stamps with cardinals. Bonus, they're super easy to tuck into a holiday card.

Even if they don't use much postage, they'll think of you when they do.

BTW, this was three years ago. Postage rates have gone up several times since then, so spending over $300 on stamps was even sorta frugal?  I still have some left, so they'll be fun gifts again this year.

If anyone gave me cute stamps that matched one of my interests, I'd be thrilled.

[Cranky]

I think it helps to remind everyone that carefully curated wishlists are a Good Thing, whether it’s Amazon or your local indie bookstore.

I’m the oldest generation in our family at this point, and I try to stick with practical stuff and hand knits. I keep saying that I don’t want anything, but honestly my kids have come up with some perfect gifts lately - a class on dyeing yarn! A curated mystery book subscription!

[Drink Coffee And Stack Money]

I've asked my large extended family repeatedly not to buy me Christmas or birthday gifts, but it still happens every year. I'm at a point in life where if I truly want something I just go buy it. I'm also very picky with what I do choose to buy. So I'll end up with more coffee mugs I don't need, neckties I don't wear, shirts I wouldn't be caught dead in, or other assorted trinkets that will eventually be tossed or given away. I'm extremely appreciative that they think of me and want to give me a gift, but I just don't need more stuff. When pressed, two gift suggestions I've actually given for at least the last 5+ years are 1. A good bottle of rum or whiskey. or 2. Just to make a donation to one of the local no-kill animal shelters. Neither of which has ever happened.

As far as giving gifts, I try to either buy gifts the person has specifically asked for, or I give consumables that I know the individual person will enjoy given their tastes (fine candies/chocolates, nice bottle of wine or other spirits, gift cards to places we know they frequent, etc.).

[Catbert]

One year a sister sent all of us gourmet dried beans:

 https://www.ranchogordo.com/collections/heirloom-beans

We all enjoyed them.

[Josiecat22222]

has anyone ever tried "broth bombs"?  I found them on the web and they look fun and a good gift for people who like to cook...I'm thinking of sending some to my brother, but I'm wondering if anyone has any experience with them.

https://brothbomb.store/collections/frontpage/products/specialty-seasoning-set

[ixtap]

I have thought of a gift for MIL and I don't think I would mind receiving something similar if there was good reasoning:

MIL likes to cook for people, including trying new recipes. DH has some good restrictions that she struggles to keep straight. I am going to look at vegetarian/vegan Paleo and Whole 30 cookbooks. They should be full of recipes appropriate for him, as long as so don't find potatoes in every other recipe.

[Thrallama]

This year for my birthday, my partner and I stayed a few nights at a spa/resort that has private hot spring-fed tubs in every room, and was walkable to a cute little downtown area with restaurants. My MIL helped with the cost of the tickets.

My mom got me some fancy King Arthur Flour baking mixes and a bottle of vanilla (I know why it's so expensive, but why is vanilla so expensive?!)

For Christmas, I sent my family a list that includes:
- New cushions for my porch chairs (fabrics don't last forever when they're outdoors)
- Fancy laser-cut wooden jigsaw puzzles (I sent them several designs that I like so they can "surprise" me)
- New insulated winter gloves
- Fancy glassware for the cocktails we like to make (yes we can serve them in any old cup, but I like gifts to have a bit of luxury)
- Some new cookbooks
- The next few books in the series I'm reading (my mom loves to give books as gifts, and I prefer owning over the library)
My mom usually also sends a box full of homemade cookies/candy, and often some hot chocolate mix.

I guess a lot of my desired/appreciated gifts are still physical "stuff," but I tend to ask for stuff that is either a replacement for something that is worn out, or an upgrade/higher quality version of something I already have (so I know I'll use it).

[Dollar Slice]

My mom got me some fancy King Arthur Flour baking mixes and a bottle of vanilla (I know why it's so expensive, but why is vanilla so expensive?!)

Maybe this is a good place to mention that Whole Foods has a couple of brands of vanilla extract on sale right now, if anyone needs some or is buying gifts for a baking hobbyist. 30% off with Prime. Including an organic one and that $$$ Nielsen-Massey brand.

(I just checked online and it looks like vanilla paste, powder and other extracts like almond are on sale as well.)

Not the cheapest option but some people go for specific brand names, especially for a gift...

[Tasse]

My mom got me some fancy King Arthur Flour baking mixes and a bottle of vanilla (I know why it's so expensive, but why is vanilla so expensive?!)

Artificial vanilla is chemically the exact same molecule (vanillin), doesn't drive deforestation in Madacascar, and I bought an 8 oz bottle yesterday for $1.50.

Not a great gift idea, as Dollar Slice said, but far preferable for everyday use imo.

Edited to make my claim more specific, cause I did oversell it slightly.

[GuitarStv]

My mom got me some fancy King Arthur Flour baking mixes and a bottle of vanilla (I know why it's so expensive, but why is vanilla so expensive?!)

Artificial vanilla is chemically the exact same molecule (vanillin), doesn't have any negative environmental impacts, and I bought an 8 oz bottle yesterday for $1.50.

Not a great gift idea, as Dollar Slice said, but far preferable for everyday use imo.

FTR I use artificial vanilla most of the time too (I'm cheap!).  But if you put it up against real vanilla there's a pretty clear taste difference.  Vanillin is the predominant one, but is only one of a whole host of chemicals that make vanilla taste like vanilla.  If you make a cookie with real vanilla vs artificial vanilla and eat them back to back . . . you will be able to pick out the real vanilla.  My wife and I did this when I kept insisting that the fake stuff was the same.  :P

(Also unfortunately not the same - minced garlic in jars vs the annoying whole cloves that you have to peel and chop up.  Shockingly different flavour in cooking.  Sucks.  I hate chopping garlic.)