How freely do you discuss your FIRE plans?

[firelight]

I talk about it to my parents and husband but that's about it.... Haven't had a chance to talk about it with friends much...It might be that we don't look super mustachian to others (despite saving more than 60% of our salaries) and lead a more 'normal' life.... But our friends don't think we can retire in ten years time (when we turn 40). Should be fun to see all the shock and awe in ten years!!

[downtownshuter]

A handful of people have said they discuss it with their husband/wife, which I thought was obvious. So I have to ask, who plans on retiring early WITHOUT discussing it with their husband/wife? That first day of ER would be interesting…

[frugalnacho]

A handful of people have said they discuss it with their husband/wife, which I thought was obvious. So I have to ask, who plans on retiring early WITHOUT discussing it with their husband/wife? That first day of ER would be interesting…

Lol.  Oh by the way honey, I secretly saved up half a million dollars without telling you.

[Beric01]

A handful of people have said they discuss it with their husband/wife, which I thought was obvious. So I have to ask, who plans on retiring early WITHOUT discussing it with their husband/wife? That first day of ER would be interesting…

Lol.  Oh by the way honey, I secretly saved up half a million dollars without telling you.

Sounds like it's about time for a divorce, where you can part with half of it.

I would never consider getting married without having my partner fully on board with my financial goals. It's a recipe for disaster.

[firelight]

The reason I specifically said I discuss it with my husband is because he doesn't believe in ER or FI even though I've shown him the numbers.... He is ready to save all the money as long as he doesn't have to do too many sacrifices.... We do live in a nicer apmt that costs more than what I'd py if it was left to me entirely, we drive a non mustachian car, etc. I know it means we are reaching FI later but I'm fine with it. So discussing it with an unconvinced spouse is still a hard thing to do.

[firelight]

And he still can't accept he won't have to work despite the numbers showing him exactly that.

[Sofa King]

I was very stoked when I first withdrew my head from the sand and realized I could actually be FIRE and free before a traditional retirement age. I told everyone I cared for that - OMG we can do this people! But I learned fast that most people don’t want to know, don’t want to change.  Mostly, people had no interest; but I inadvertently tapped into the fears and denials that surround money matters for some people, and I got negative comments that I didn’t expect and that shocked me.  Same reactions from my family, although one of them got the idea that I was secretly rich and tried to access one of my accounts. 

I will never again have a FIRE conversation with family and friends, unless they directly ask me why I live the way I do, or express a positive interest. Their business is their business. I keep my finances, spending habits and goals to myself; although like other commenters, I have those employee reviews, and would love to tell them I don’t expect to be around long enough to need long-term career goals.

EXCELLENT!!!!   

[Unique User]

I've been more open with friends lately and a few friends from work.  Surprisingly, no one has blinked when I say we can stop working in 7-8 years when college is paid for.  I'm 44 though, so that may be why I get very few questions.  I have admitted to a few people that we save 50% of our income.  Again, few questions, but I am known as being non-materialistic. 

[HawkeyeNFO]

..... most people don't even realize FIRE is an option for normal people, they think you must hit the lottery or get a huge inheritance.  I feel obligated to expose them to a bit of MMM knowledge and let them know how simple it is.  Most of them still don't get it after it's explained either.

I'm just fine with most people not giving a crap.  If they want to work until they're 70, then great.  After all, if you are investing in companies via mutual funds, stocks, and bonds, then you (as the owner) need to have labor employed so that you can keep on making profits.  If everyone tried to FIRE, then it would probably be more difficult.

FIRE is a product of capitalism and your individual freedom, but you must use your brain to do it effectively. 

[RootofGood]

I don't talk about it with friends too often.  Most just don't really care at all or don't want to bring it up.

I assume most of my friends know what's up with my early retirement.  Most are on facebook, and I occasionally make comments regarding ER and share some blog posts that tell all (monthly spending, investments, net worth to the nearest $1000, etc).  And I'm open with them when they ask what I'm doing all day.  Only a small handful of friends ever ask about the financial/investment side of ER and it's really "how do I make my situation better?" rather than "exactly how many million did you say you have saved?". 

Most friends that do bring up my ER are asking about the lifestyle, not the finances.  "What do you do all day?"  "Must be awesome to have all the free time you want and no shitty bosses to tell you what to do."  "Where's your next big trip?"  "Ever thought about going back to work?" 

[tanhanivar]

I told some people at work that I wanted to have my mortgage paid off before I'm up for long-service leave, and they were impressed but cool with it. It helps being public service - given the lower pay recent lack of job security everyone's on board with being frugal, and most of my friends are saving frantically for weddings, etc, so they get that you can put money aside.

[Northerly]

I have been greatly bettered by family and friends who shared their enthusiasm for FIRE (though they were not into the frugality aspect, just the invest, get rich, and quit mindset). I passed this on to my sisters with the MMM twist, and their families are now on the path to FIRE inside of 7 years. What a dismal place my world would be if everyone had just kept their mouths shut. Be generous, share the intellectual wealth!

[libertarian4321]

I never discussed it with anyone while I was working toward FI (except certain members of my family).  If a co-worker poked fun at the fact that I ordered water at a restaurant, I'd just say "why pay $2 for tea/coke, when water is just as good, and free?"

I retired at age 43.  But after a few years of RE, I was slowly dragged back into the work force on my own terms (primarily working from home, no more than 40 hours per week, no BS meetings, not being forced to wear a tie, and avoiding a few other chicken squat "rules").  At that point, it was kinda hard to hide it.  Now, I just tell folks that my wife and I are frugal, that we are FI (I never tell them that we are multimillionaires, though).  You'd be amazed at how many people are not scornful, but rather ask for advice.

So I guess I'm far more open about my "secret life" here than in real life :)  It's kind of weird that a lot of us find it better to "keep in the closet" about being FI.

And yeah, I still order water at restaurants...

[hobbes1]

I found few people that seem interested in talking about it or trying out, let alone committing to decreasing consumerism. There are a few people at work that I've shared the basic idea with and discussed some. While seemingly interested and impressed, they can't seem to bring themselves to make any serious changes towards the same type of goals (no debt, FI, etc.). Only one person at work seems to be making a few small changes towards improved financial help and so I'm cautiously optimistic for that one! I have mentioned the Republic Wireless change my wife and I made a few months ago and the referral link that would give them and me a credit, but so far, no one else wants to give up their $100-200/month cell phone plan.
 I don't bother talking about it at all anymore unless someone brings it up first. My wife and I discuss spending/saving, etc. pretty regularly and help each other stay on course :) Ultimately, this is all that matters to me.

[Gone Fishing]

My wife hears about it every day:)  My dad and I talk regularly as well as we are on track to retire within a few months of each other and a lot of the tax planning, investment strategy, ect is very similar.  I talk about it with a few select friends but don't share bottom line numbers.  Those friends are interested but not motivated enough to go for the gold.  I have inspired them to open retirement accounts and increase contributions, though.  I went out on a limb with a prospective employer who was a former co-worker  with a good working relationship and told him I may try to back down to part-time at some point so I can spend more time with my children, he made a smart remark about being a "kept man".  I get the feeling that he is old fashioned and thinks staying at home with the kids is woman's work (his wife works part time), but all from a guy that has tried to quit the rat race 2x and had to come back.  Now that I am getting close to ER, I figure I need to warn folks, so I just tell them that I am going to "take some time off" and never really mention when I plan on going back.