FIRE may not be for me

[lordmetroid]

I am not at all retired yet, I got about 20% of my number but I got laid off a couple of weeks ago and since 1st of September I have been relieved from work. My severance package extends to the 20th of September and then my unemployment insurance will kick in which will be 80% of my last years salary for 20 weeks and then 70% for 40 weeks.

When I got a job, I am constantly miserable and exhausted. I loath taking orders and I loath having my life dictated around the work-hours.

However, now when I have been home for a week, all I do is watch TV and go to bed in the middle of the night and sleep late. I am not even actively trying to get a new job.

[big_slacker]

Try doing something other than sitting around, your mood an opinion might improve. :)

[iknowiyam]

Try doing something other than sitting around, your mood an opinion might improve. :)

Agreed. You're in a rut, bummed about the job situation. I quit my job on purpose without FI, and I still somewhat went through that.

[EricP]

Agree with above posters.  I would not take your reaction to a firing as indicative of what life would be like during ER.  You've got a lot of stress on you and it's very early.  During my one extended period without work (60 days paid leave) I found the first few weeks were very much TV and being lazy, but then I started adding activities to my routine so that I wasn't just watching the third time through of SportsCenter.

[lauren_knows]

Agree with above posters.  I would not take your reaction to a firing as indicative of what life would be like during ER.  You've got a lot of stress on you and it's very early. 

Exactly.  It's one thing to FIRE, knowing that you're financially secure and can do whatever you want.  It's an entirely other psychological beast to be laid off, worrying about the future of your finances, and feeling semi-depressed.

[runningthroughFIRE]

It seems to me like you're missing the point of FIRE.  The goal isn't to "retire" and never work or be productive again.  The goal is to have the financial security to CHOOSE when, how, and where you work without being bound to monetary concerns.  You seem to be in a rut, and would feel a lot better if you had a goal to set yourself towards

[thd7t]

You might be a good candidate for "just FI".  You could still make your number, but not be at someone's beck-and-call.  You'd have greater control over your life.  Even if you don't want ER, you will benefit from continuing to save and be mindful.

[Tyson]

You might be a good candidate for "just FI".  You could still make your number, but not be at someone's beck-and-call.  You'd have greater control over your life.  Even if you don't want ER, you will benefit from continuing to save and be mindful.

Yes, this is what fits for me - being FI is my goal.  I actually really like my work, so I don't seen kicking that to the curb even after I become FI. 

[fattest_foot]

The fact that you still need to get another job at some point in the future - for sure - changes the situation psychologically for you. Your experiences now may be very different than when you finally retire just based on the circumstances.

Currently you're unemployed, not FIRE.

[Retired To Win]

...now when I have been home for a week, all I do is watch TV and go to bed in the middle of the night and sleep late....

Simply stated, you need to find something to do that you want to do.  First step, don't turn that TV on.  Second step, get your ass out for a walk and think.  Third step, pay attention to what your mind dishes out.

Good luck.

[DoubleDown]

Also, self-employment or starting a business might be more up your alley. Then you can work on something that interests you, hopefully have the motivation and incentive to work and do well at it, and can mostly dictate when/how you work (I say "mostly" because if you're going to be profitable you will of course have some outside factors to satisfy, like customers).

[bobechs]

Look, as long as you are just going to veg in front of the screen at least be watching a Trailer Park Boys marathon.

It's like a training film for your lifestyle-of-choice.

[StockBeard]

I'd say you shouldn't worry unless this lasts for several months. For now, you're just in vacation/boredom mode which I think is normal, since you were laid off very recently.

I read a lot that people who got a job burnout take quite some time "off" doing absolutely nothing before doing nothing finally becomes boring to them. That's when things get better again

[Gone Fishing]

...now when I have been home for a week, all I do is watch TV and go to bed in the middle of the night and sleep late....

Simply stated, you need to find something to do that you want to do.  First step, don't turn that TV on.  Second step, get your ass out for a walk and think.  Third step, pay attention to what your mind dishes out.

Good luck.

What RTW said.

Sounds like you have a pretty good package. When the time comes, perhaps you can negotiate a later start date with your new employer and actually enjoy some of it knowing you have a job lined up.

[MrMoneyMaxwell]

There are websites for people in just about every area of the country. I think it's meetup.com or something (don't quote me on that in case it's a porn site, I'm at work and not willing to risk it).

Type in something you're interested in and there's probably a group of people out there organizing an event. Same thing for some parts of craigslist.

[11ducks]

I am not at all retired yet, I got about 20% of my number but I got laid off a couple of weeks ago and since 1st of September I have been relieved from work. My severance package extends to the 20th of September and then my unemployment insurance will kick in which will be 80% of my last years salary for 20 weeks and then 70% for 40 weeks.

When I got a job, I am constantly miserable and exhausted. I loath taking orders and I loath having my life dictated around the work-hours.

However, now when I have been home for a week, all I do is watch TV and go to bed in the middle of the night and sleep late. I am not even actively trying to get a new job.

Sounds like a wonderful opportunity to find something to do in life that makes you happy!!

[cerebus]

Sounds like you could have some depression.

[MrsPfennig]

I'm sorry you have a rough time. Unemployment is absolutely different from Fire. Take some time to process and then figure out what you would like to do.

Hope that link helps you:

http://www.forbes.com/sites/womensmedia/2012/06/12/bouncing-back-from-job-loss-the-7-habits-of-highly-effective-job-hunters/

[HazelStone]

During my last bout of unemployment, I was both relieved and nervous. I had been unemployed in 2009, entering the market in the darkest part of the recession in terms of the labor market.

Relieved because I no longer had my job from hell. It had taken a nasty toll on my mental health. And I knew that if I got through one recession, I could get through another. I was nervous because I had vivid memories of the misery of long term unemployment. I kick myself now for not doing more during that stretch, but in hindsight it is easy to dismiss the depth of burnout and depression one was already mired in before losing the job.

I imagine that once I make FIRE a lot of the stress and anxiety over not being employed would disappear. Knowing that yes, I could make my bills still and at most would need a little part time work for splash room would do a lot for breaking the anxiety spiral.

If your friends or family express concerns about depression, do hear them out though.

[EllieStan]

I felt exactly like you this summer when my contract ended. I felt miserable and lazy. I slept, watched TV, wasted my time online. What could I do? Everything costs money, and I didn't want to deplete my tiny emergency savings just for the sake of entertaining myself. So I waited until my new contract was signed. I'm much better now that I'm working, but there are still things that I dislike about my job situation.

I think your feeling is understandable, and it's mainly because it wasn't your choice. FIRE is a choice you make when you feel ready. It cannot possibly compare to losing your job at an unexpected moment.

[sheepstache]

Your self-narrative plays a big role. If you view yourself as vegging out because you're lazy, that makes you feel worse. If you change the narrative so that you tell yourself you're vegging out because you've just been put through the ringer and need some time to decompress and recuperate, you might bounce back faster.

I'm not saying don't face reality, but if you're not certain why you're acting a certain way, give yourself the benefit of the doubt.

It stands out to me that you're grouping your sleep pattern into the negative things you're saying about yourself. Yet what's wrong with going to bed late and waking up late? Nothing. Your perception is coloring your view of the facts. Maybe you're a night person.

[Shiernian]

Unemployment is really hard but I'm glad you are out of that crappy job. It's a gift!
You've probably just had some bad bosses - in the right job you wouldn't feel so bad at work.
see if state unemployment office has any personality tests or any assessments to help you self-reflect or figure out what type of job you want. You are part of this community so we already know you can tough this out! :-) keep us posted. This change will end up being a gift for your future self I predict!

[EllieStan]

It stands out to me that you're grouping your sleep pattern into the negative things you're saying about yourself. Yet what's wrong with going to bed late and waking up late? Nothing. Your perception is coloring your view of the facts. Maybe you're a night person.

True! The ''normal'' sleep hours are a social construct. Plenty of people (myself included) struggle to sleep the average 10pm-6am. I wrote most of my thesis between 4pm and 2 am. Couldn't even get a sentence straight before noon. The routine of an office day job was quite a challenge for me. It still is almost a year later. I often feel exhausted when I wake up, even if I went to bed early.

Also, napping should definitely be a thing at most jobs.