Experiences vs Objects - Whats more important?

[Jupiter]

Edit: Read this for a better clarification of the object vs experience definition I'm talking about so we are on the same page: http://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/experiences-vs-objects-whats-more-important/msg823361/#msg823361

I'm not really into spending my money especially not at my current age (only really spend it on essentials such as bills) but I am interested in how important experiences are to people as opposed to a permanent object (nothing is really permanent but lets say something that will last 5 years or so). I'm practically an alien to the rest of the world that mentally lacks what makes humans, well... human. I am starting to find the way normal humans think quite interesting.

Anyway first of all lets define a few examples of experiences and objects...

An experience might be:
- A 2 week cruise
- A night out to (heh, sorry I don't really know where people go when they go out... fancy dinner or something?)
- Renting a Lamborghini Aventador to speed 300km per hour on a race track
- Going sky diving
- Going on a roller coaster

Objects might be:
- A tech product, iPhone, computer, Oculus Rift, fancy high tech car
- Hand gliding/adventure objects
- Clothes, Jewellery, Wearables
- Large pool
- A private plane or helicopter

Lets just say you have 10K ready to spend right now on a luxury of your choice and it's money you haven't earned and are not allowed to bank or invest. It's almost like a gift card that must be spent on something immediately otherwise it will expire. What do you spend it on? Items or experiences?

For me I prefer items hands down (I'm very materialistic, practically the definition of it but I don't like owning much stuff... A minimalistic materialist?). Experiences are absolutely worthless to me because they take your money and the moment they are over that's it. They are simply a memory and what use is a memory of say a relaxing cruise. For me such a memory is just a tease. I'd rather buy a powerful $8,000 computer than spend it on a holiday because at least it will last years rather than weeks and it will be here to use rather than haunt and tease me for however long the memory sits around wasting brain space.

The closest thing to an experience that I would spend my money on is a visit to The Monroe Institute which provides guidance (different courses of varying difficulty) allowing you to have spiritual experiences such as OOBE's. The reason I would consider such a thing is because unlike a holiday you could learn to get yourself into a variety of different interesting states. In other words you are taking home a skill and can use this skill to reach altered states of consciousness whenever you like. I wouldn't go though until my weekly stable passive income (lets say for example investment property rent) was greater than the cost of attending and that's a good 10+ years away.

Anyway what are your opinions of objects vs experiences? Do any of you cling to one side or the other or do most of you spend money fairly evenly on each? Are memories important to you or do you prefer something physical that you can use now rather than remember back on with jealousy. Ignore the biased wording there...

[Cookie78]

Experiences. Every single time. But the experiences you listed all sound kinda lame.

Experiences aren't just memories to me, they are character building. They change who I am permanently. They add knowledge and value to who I feel I am. Most stuff just collects dust and gets in the way. The only time I want to buy objects is when they contribute to experiences (like hang gliding/adventure objects might).

I don't look back on my past experiences, or on the experiences of others, with jealousy. My experiences create fond memories and exciting stories to share. Unlike the stuff I bought in the past, most of which is long gone and/or long forgotten.

If I had 10k I needed to spend on a luxury of my choice it would be spent either on an experience, or on an object that would lead to more/better/different experiences. Right now I'd probably add it to my camper van fund (so I can drive away when I FIRE and experience the world).

[ketchup]

I certainly wouldn't get much enjoyment out of the three experiences you listed.  I value certain experiences over certain objects and certain objects over certain experiences.  I'd rather fly to New Zealand for a month than have a flashy car.  I'd rather have a dog than go on a cruise of any length.

But if someone gave me ten grand I had to spend TODAY, I'd fill our freezers with fancy pasture-raised meat, buy a year or two's worth of canned tuna, cashews, canned coconut milk, canned vegetables, and other pantry-stable groceries.  I'd buy everything I need for the next five years of car maintenance. I'd replace our 1983 furnace with some fancy-ass new and efficient model.  I'd buy my dad a nice big bag of M&Ms.  And probably upgrade my computer to last another 5-7 years.  And plane tickets to New Zealand if I had money left over after all that.

[NotJen]

Anyway what are your opinions of objects vs experiences? Do any of you cling to one side or the other or do most of you spend money fairly evenly on each? Are memories important to you or do you prefer something physical that you can use now rather than remember back on with jealousy. Ignore the biased wording there...

I'm not quite sure how I could be jealous of myself...?

The great thing about life is that you get to choose what to spend your money on!  If you like stuff, cool, buy stuff.  I do prefer experiences, so that's where I spend my money.

Personally, stuff doesn't make me happy.  It adds clutter to my life, and deciding what to buy when I do need something is stressful.  However, planning a trip gives me great enjoyment.  I happily occupy my mind with research and planning prior to the trip, and then enjoy the fruits of my labor.  I usually bring back only pictures, and do enjoy browsing through and remembering past trips.  I've realized that what I really enjoy are active vacations, and lately I've been doing a lot of hiking.  So, there is also an aspect of personal improvement in my trips - I try to do more difficult hikes each time, and it is motivation to keep up my physical fitness in between trips.

[zephyr911]

It's pretty much impossible to objectively settle a question of values and preferences, but I have moved more toward experiences over objects, probably due to the loss of most of the "stuff" I kept from my childhood in a series of moves as an adult. Basically, I realized I was still the same person and still just as happy, capable, etc.

My list of future aspirations basically has three categories, one of which is "things to have" and the other two of which are experiential - locations, and people. The "things" list is pretty damn small and 100% negotiable at this point.

[Bob W]

Experiences are temporary.  The memories last a week and the 10 minutes per year looking at the pictures.  Still they are fun.

In a false dichotomy of say a new tablet with internet access (about $700 per year) vs. a five day get away  --- I'm picking the tablet. 

[bacchi]

Both. I don't enjoy most objects, like yourself, and a lot of cool experiences that are popular blogging post topics bore me. I do own certain things that, years later, I still enjoy. Likewise, I have great memories of certain trips.

[UnleashHell]

Um- tough one. I could buy some excellent kitchen equipment and upgrades that I believe would add to the quality of my life (buying them to be forever).
However I did spend a few thousand dollars earlier this year to go on a cruise. The cruise itself was nice but the most important part – we (me, wife and 2 kids) went with my Parents. It has been 35 years since I last went on a cruise with them and my kids have never cruised with them. My mother is on a path through dementia (and one that obviously doesn’t have a good ending) and the chance for us all to go on holiday together was perfect timing. Its something that probably can’t be replicated again and creates some memories for all of us that will last for ever (except for ma because she’s batshit crazy).

I still have debts I’m paying off and I wouldn’t change the cruise we did for the world.

[AZDude]

In a one time deal, maybe it makes more sense to buy an object, but over a lifetime experiences get the nod, for me. You want to spend your life at home by yourself with the latest gadgets or every month or so get out and do something new and exciting?

If your idea of an experience is renting a car and driving around, then maybe that is why you prefer objects. With $10,000, that is a month-long trip anywhere in the world.

There is also something to be said for the personal growth that comes with experiences.

[BigEasy]

Here we go....

Experiences!

My grown kids are flying in for a football weekend. LSU game Saturday night and Saints / Cowboys Sunday night. We started this tradition several years ago as we're all big football fans.

Naturally Dad and Mom are picking up most of the tab! But what great memories we have from our visits...Hope Drew Brees is healthy enough to start!

Big Easy

[honeybbq]

Experiences. Every single time. But the experiences you listed all sound kinda lame.

Experiences aren't just memories to me, they are character building. They change who I am permanently. They add knowledge and value to who I feel I am. Most stuff just collects dust and gets in the way. The only time I want to buy objects is when they contribute to experiences (like hang gliding/adventure objects might).

I don't look back on my past experiences, or on the experiences of others, with jealousy. My experiences create fond memories and exciting stories to share. Unlike the stuff I bought in the past, most of which is long gone and/or long forgotten.

If I had 10k I needed to spend on a luxury of my choice it would be spent either on an experience, or on an object that would lead to more/better/different experiences. Right now I'd probably add it to my camper van fund (so I can drive away when I FIRE and experience the world).

+1 to all this. My time spent on vacation, backpacking through NZ, spending quality time with family... it's all priceless. It makes you value your life and being on earth more than anything.

Stuff is just stuff. It can add little perks to your day and be fun, but for the most part, I pass.

[GuitarStv]

My favorite experiences have all been very very cheap.

Playing soccer with friends, competing in wrestling and boxing tournaments, playing guitar with friends, cycling with friends, spending time with family, hanging out with friends . . . these things aren't terribly expensive.  I'd put all of those experiences way above any previous vacation.  Since I've never had trouble having great experiences on a shoestring budget, I'd be inclined to lean towards the 'objects' side of the equation.

The objects that tend to excite me tend to be more expensive, but last for ages.  A nice bicycle, a really awesome guitar, a good Olympic bar and some weights, a nice sound system.  They give great experiences to me over and over again, so maybe the question is a bit of a false dichotomy.

[RangerOne]

Don't ever discount an experience as a worthy purchase because it is temporary.

I was against spending a lot of money on our honeymoon, which we took touring Japan. In the end I loosened up and we really got to enjoy more than I thought possible in a 15 day trip. We got to see so much and meet so many people. It has brought me at least as much joy in hindsight as any object I have purchase in my lifetime if not more than most of them.

In then end we are always paying for experiences. Even if you buy something tangible you are paying for the experience of using it at your discretion.

[runningthroughFIRE]

I'm going to say experiences, but with the caveat that I don't see the distinction between objects and experiences as many people here seem to.  I consider every material thing in terms of what I can *do* with it.  I bought one of the new xboxes and built a fancy new computer because it enabled me to play games and chat with friends from my home town like I did when I was a kid.  I bought a tablet so I could read ebooks from the comfort of a nice chair or my bed when I was living in an area that didn't have easy access to a library.  I also use it for long-distance video chats with the lady friend.  Facepunches are, as always, welcome, but I'm content with the fancypants spending here because it lets me *do* things that are important to me that I otherwise wouldn't.

Basically, I think of buying/possessing objects in terms of the experiences they afford me.  If I had $10K fall in my lap with the condition I spend it, I'd get a more gas-efficient car, or at least get new wheels so I don't have to constantly check my tire pressure.  Beyond that, I'd use it to visit Hawaii or somewhere and take surfing lessons, or get my skydivince license.

[gt7152b]

I choose objects that facilitate great experiences repeatedly. Money spent on a singular experience is somewhat of a waste in my opinion because it's just going to be a memory and can get really pricey if you want to relive the experience. I'd rather spend money on equipment that brings me the experience over and over with a low per usage cost. That way my expense gets lower the more times I enjoy the experience. Mountain biking is a great example. My bike is expensive and there are consumable parts like tires and drivetrain but I can go ride it everyday. I can keep working on my skills as a mountain biker and the experience actually gets better as I become more skilled. The per usage cost of the bike goes down every time I ride too so the experience becomes better and cheaper with each additional use. Sometimes I wish I was a runner instead to keep costs even lower but I just don't like running that much.

[Bajadoc]

I have been very lucky. I have never had to fly halfway around the world to have a week long good experience. I live in a great place and most days are a great experience. Life is a balance between stuff and experiences. All in all contrived experiences are overrated. So is most stuff.

[Jupiter]

Ah, so looking at this I can see that there is a greater pull on the side of experiences however there are a rare few who are into objects. A little debate that came up here is "you can have experiences through the objects you buy". I'm fully aware of this and that's why I'm labelling experiences as "things you walk away with a memory of but nothing else". As a present for my dad one year my mum bought him the experience of hanging on to the back of a motorcycle expert while they went around a race track at 200km per hour. That is my definition of an experience as he doesn't get to take home or keep anything from that except for a memory.

So if you said you like to buy an object to have experiences with that object then I would put you on the objects side as opposed to the experience side. Lets say you buy a powerful computer, an oculus rift (virtual reality headset) and a virtuix omni (360 degree treadmill so you and walk, run, jump, crouch and sit in a virtual world). Using the oculus rift you can have many experiences such as being under water, flying through space and practically anything (note the lack of touch and smell but these are the early days and at least you can look around you and explore). You have bought that object for those virtual reality experiences but the object remains thus you can actually relive these experiences whenever you like unlike the motorbike ride around the race track that will cost you $80 every time and leave you walking away with nothing but a memory.

The same goes for a hand glider. You may go out hand gliding with it on the weekends and this experience is repeatable as you still have the object. Thus you are an object person rather than an experience person. Paying to jump out of a plane with a parachute is an unrepeatable experience that leaves you with nothing but the memory (unless you pay money and do it again and again... but you are still left with nothing to keep). Buying a plane however leaves you with that plane thus giving you the freedom to have the experiences with that plane whenever you like thus you are an object person.

An experience person is someone who thinks "I'm eager to visit Sydney Australia so I can do the harbour bridge walk, ride on a ferry to Manly and go ghost hunting at Quarantine station, check out the Oprah house, eat some amazing pancakes at Pancakes On The Rocks and then stand at the top of centre point tower to take in the views of the city. They then sleep in a fancy Hotel dreaming of what other possible adventures they will have the next day until their trip is finished and all they are left with when they get back is the memories of the trip which will leave them craving for more. I actually wouldn't mind to do such a thing and be an experience person myself if I was retired and raking in $10,000 a week in passive income because then these experiences somewhat become repeatable as you practically have an infinite money source being able to spend 10K a week (I'd spend no more than half my passive income though so it can continue to grow) going on whatever experiences and adventures you want to. If 10K is 3 months of my hard earned wage I'd prefer to spend it on the Virtual reality setup that will last me 5 years as opposed to the one week trip that will last me... one week.

[Cranky]

How old are we? How much stuff do we have?

In my 20's, I would choose to spend on practical stuff. House, furniture, canning supplies, gardening equipment.

At my point in life, I've got plenty of stuff, and could not be less interested in renting a lambourgini. But I'd take my grown kids on a vacation so we could all spend time together - we'll never get more time.

[Lady Fordragon]

Definitely experiences!  My birthday this year was all about experiences.  I went to Las Vegas with a small group of friends and had a blast.  I also got tickets to two concerts as gifts.  All in all, the memories  from these experiences are priceless and I'll remember them fondly.

[Jupiter]

That's a good point Cranky, this question really changes depending on how old you are and how rich you are. I'm comparing you guys to the guys at my work in their 20's and 30's going out every night and then spending whatever left over money they saved over the last 3 months to blow it on a holiday. They then spend the next 3 months again craving the holiday while miserable at work living paycheck to paycheck then repeat this process again and again with their 36K job.

Feel free to answer the question then from your current life situation and the life situation of those I just referred to at my work.

P.S Sounds great Lady Fordragon but aren't you looking back with jealousy wishing that you had a time machine so you could go back and experience it again whenever you like or do you now feel like "been there, done that" and you are satisfied with your experience with no desire to go do it again? Lets say you went out alone instead of with friends, would this change your outlook on the experience?

[Lady Fordragon]

P.S Sounds great Lady Fordragon but aren't you looking back with jealousy wishing that you had a time machine so you could go back and experience it again whenever you like or do you now feel like "been there, done that" and you are satisfied with your experience with no desire to go do it again? Lets say you went out alone instead of with friends, would this change your outlook on the experience?

Yeah, it would be awesome to relive the experience, but I'm perfectly content with just having the memories to think back on.  Now if I went alone, it definitely wouldn't have been the same.  I like sharing experiences with family and friends.

[mancityfan]

I just had a birthday and my daughter (in college) sent me a lovely gift. 40 pieces of paper in a jar. On each piece of paper she had written a memory of things we did together/experienced together.

[Lady Fordragon]

What an awesome gift! 

[use2betrix]

Right now I'm doing both, even though it may delay retirement a few years. I've saved very hard the last 4-5 months and worked a ton. I just bought a new iPhone 6s plus, am getting the surface pro 4 when its released next week. Experience wise I'm going to Austin Tx to party for a weekend with my fiancé, marrying her in Vegas late this year, then hopefully backpacking Asia for a month when my current contract ends. The wedding will be expensive but also a great time to get all my closes loved ones together from throughout the years.

I have always valued materials more, but need my occasional experiences. Now, I am quickly shifting towards experiences. I'm getting the 6s because my fiancé needs a phone so I'm giving her my old one, and the surface pro because I haven't bought a computer in 7 years. I've also taken home about 20k more than I originally planned the last 4 months, so I'm ok with justifying it.

Im 27 now, and from about 18-23 I was the guy at the club wasting money on drinks every weekend. That being said, I had an AMAZING time all those years with experiences and stories that most people couldn't fathom. I would not trade those experiences for a monetary number right now. As I slow down I can relish those times and live vicariously through myself.

[GuitarStv]

What an awesome gift!

Only if you value things above experiences . . .





:P

[skunkfunk]

My first instinct is to say experiences, but then again, I could easily drop $10k upgrading my fleet of musical instruments. I do actually use these to make quite a bit of money, but getting better instruments is unlikely to result in an increase in the amount of work I get - providing essentially no return on investment.

[2Birds1Stone]

Experience or an object that will provide experiences......such as a mountain bike, or a snowboard.

[justajane]

You are creating a false dichotomy. Objects can create valuable experiences. The reverse is less true, but experiences can lead one to purchase objects, e.g. you go to an opening at an art gallery and purchase something. Or a concert and you purchase a t-shirt. That object then reminds you of the meaningful experience you had.

I don't find importance in objects that don't lead to meaningful experiences, but most objects do. Objects in the kitchen lead me to have a pleasant experience eating the food I have prepared. A television enables me to watch an enjoyable program. Yes, I know this is sometimes anathema on here, but it doesn't make it any less true for those of us who actually enjoy watching quality television shows.

In essence, both are important to a meaningful life. You are also somehow implying here that experiences need be monetary, e.g. travel or a concert. But obviously we Mustachians know that some of the best experiences in life are free.

[MrsPete]

Both.  You can't generalize.

Objects that bring enjoyment and value to your life are worthwhile spends.  Someone mentioned kitchen equipment -- yes, I love to cook, and just last night I was thinking as I washed dishes how much I'm enjoying the new set of frying pans I bought last year.  They've genuinely enhanced my time in the kitchen, and they're likely to last the rest of my life.  A good spend. 

Experiences are fun, they leave you with wonderful memories, and they allow you to grow as a person.  (Though I do agree that the experiences listed above don't appeal to me personally.)  They can be "good spends" in a whole different way. 

Either one, however, should be chosen carefully.  Spur-of-the-moment splurges are what often ends up feeling like a waste. 

[Alectejas]

$10,000 of crystal meth seems like the best choice to me.

[Dollar Slice]

An experience person is someone who thinks "I'm eager to visit Sydney Australia so I can do the harbour bridge walk, ride on a ferry to Manly and go ghost hunting at Quarantine station, check out the Oprah house, eat some amazing pancakes at Pancakes On The Rocks and then stand at the top of centre point tower to take in the views of the city. They then sleep in a fancy Hotel dreaming of what other possible adventures they will have the next day until their trip is finished and all they are left with when they get back is the memories of the trip which will leave them craving for more. I actually wouldn't mind to do such a thing and be an experience person myself if I was retired and raking in $10,000 a week in passive income because then these experiences somewhat become repeatable

I'm definitely a person who values experiences over things, but to me this sounds like the exact opposite of what I want from an experience. I want to experience things that are UNIQUE, not repeatable. I don't want to live my life in a predictable little rut. I don't want to live the same life as everyone else. I don't want to sit in an office every day, I don't want the same sandwich for lunch every day, I don't want to listen to the same album every day that I got when I was 15. My biggest passion is live performance (mostly music, but also theater, performance art, etc.) and that is, in part, because every performance is a unique event that will never be repeated the same way... and I was there, and I have that memory, which only a tiny number of people in the world can have.

The reason travel is a worthwhile experience to me is because I can do something different than my day-to-day life - go to a different place, eat different food, meet different people, see different things, go to museums I've never been to before, etc. Exposing myself to new ideas and keeping an open mind is very important to me. Meeting new people from many different walks of life is a big part of that.

One day I will look back at my life and I'm pretty sure I won't say "I wish I'd played more video games" or "I wish I'd been an early adopter of 3D technology" or "I wish I'd spent more nights getting shitfaced with the same four friends."

What do you think about when you look back on your life so far? What are your highlights?

[Jon_Snow]

I'm definitely on the "objects as GATEWAYS to experiences" bandwagon.

I cannot even attempt to detail the "experiences" made possible when I bought my first touring sea kayak back in 1998...though I think those that might be familiar with my story have a pretty good idea what I'm talking about.

The decision to buy that sleek little craft (for a cool 4K, which freaked me out back then) was one of the cornerstone events of my life. I say this with steadfast conviction.

[okits]

Jupiter, you seem to feel that experiences (which leave only a memory) aren't worthwhile due to their finite nature and the longing they leave behind for more of the (expensive) same.  Experiences can have a lasting impact, whether you learn something or the experience transforms how you see the world (you may not think someone can change how their mind works, but I do.  It's uncommon, but not impossible.)

I think it's bad for one's brain, spirit, and health to constantly be stressed and unhappy. Conversely, I think those things are rested and strengthened when you have a period (or consecutive periods) of low-stress and happiness.  The same goes for relationships.  You can't prevent every shitstorm life throws at you, but having shared some sunny days helps you get through the stormy ones together (your relationship bolstered by the good times, not just constantly ground down by the bad.)

For the must-spend $10k, I'd do a family vacation. Absolutely.

[Gone Fishing]

I would totally buy objects (hobby and rec related) that yield long term experiences.  I don't think anyone would argue that a motorcycle, if you ride it and don't just store it in the garage, doesn't yield experiences.  Blowing the wad on a once in a lifetime trip would be good too, but as others have mentioned, the joy seems to fade a bit faster.

[Giro]

+1 on things that bring experiences.  My DH LOVES his guitars, amps and all of the other gear.  he spends probably 500+ hours a year enjoying his "gear" and making quite a bit of extra cash.   

I do not enjoy vacations too much but I love driving the sh*t out of my sports car. 

so things for us, but not cluttery, yucky things that provide no entertainment. 

[Lady Fordragon]

You are creating a false dichotomy. Objects can create valuable experiences. The reverse is less true, but experiences can lead one to purchase objects, e.g. you go to an opening at an art gallery and purchase something. Or a concert and you purchase a t-shirt. That object then reminds you of the meaningful experience you had.

I don't find importance in objects that don't lead to meaningful experiences, but most objects do. Objects in the kitchen lead me to have a pleasant experience eating the food I have prepared. A television enables me to watch an enjoyable program. Yes, I know this is sometimes anathema on here, but it doesn't make it any less true for those of us who actually enjoy watching quality television shows.

In essence, both are important to a meaningful life. You are also somehow implying here that experiences need be monetary, e.g. travel or a concert. But obviously we Mustachians know that some of the best experiences in life are free.

Well said!

[Jupiter]

Nice replies guys,

I feel I left this thread a little too open in the way it can be answered and that has caused a lot of questioning and people to look deeper into the situation than I actually meant. What I was trying to say is would you spend your 10K on a one off event/experience or an object that provides experiences for as long as it lasts. I believe the idea of "objects vs experiences" was a wrong title as you don't buy a computer for the object it is so that you just stare at it, you buy it for the experiences it can provide you with. In other words I guess I messed up there...

Really this was mostly coming from my dislike in my ex-coworkers in their early 20's (yep, today was my last day at my old job!) spending $8,000 on a holiday to Europe that lasts them a month and both of them were utterly depressed when they came back (both crying) because it was over and kept complaining how they want to do it again but have "run out of money" and now are back in this dump (their workplace) and feel like life absolutely sucks.

That's why I'm against one off experiences like that. They should have bought something that would last especially since that is literally 3 months of their full time wage that they spent an entire year saving for (thus saving 25% of their income for the holiday and blowing the other 75% on clubbing). If I could give them advice (I won't, it's their life) I would tell them to save all their money, invest and build up a passive income of $2,000 a week (over the next 10 years) so they can go on a permanent holiday lifestyle around the world with limitless funds so they never have to work again and the holiday will never end thus they have their perfect life 100% of the time as opposed to less than 10% of the time. In the meantime buy something, an object and use it to keep themselves happy for long periods of time so they don't have to go on holidays together to have fun, do something that's cheaper and easier to maintain and if it's something free that's Awesome! They can still have fun say, hang gliding together but SAVE YOUR MONEY!

Still, I've enjoyed the responses. It's interesting how the topic can go into different directions than you expect due to different minds with different life experiences responding.

[dividend]

If creating memories isn't worth anything, then what's the point of living?  A rat race to accumulate the most, nicest stuff?  Every time I walk by the cornucopia of magnets from my trips, or put on a piece of jewelry that I bought while on vacation, it's like touching a direct link to the happiness of those travels.  I've traveled with family, friends, loved ones, and strangers who became friends.  Sure, my friends and I could have spent our money separately on things, on stuff to use in our 9-5 lives instead of spending a week together in Hawaii.  And there is a logical argument that each of us owning a nicer computer or a better skillet or a shinier widget is a more sensible use of money.  But I wouldn't trade a full set of All-Clad for standing on top of a ridge watching the sun rise over the ocean with 3 of the people I adore most in the world.  The happiness that flooded over me just typing that makes it all worth it. 

Of course, I say this as someone who does both.  The best comment in this thread is that it's not an either or.  I can have my experiences and my nice cookware too.  But if I was handed $10k to spend, it's be 5% stuff and 95% seeing how much of the vast wild world I could see with it.

[GuitarStv]

If creating memories isn't worth anything, then what's the point of living?

Why does living need to have a point?

[NotJen]

Really this was mostly coming from my dislike in my ex-coworkers in their early 20's (yep, today was my last day at my old job!) spending $8,000 on a holiday to Europe that lasts them a month and both of them were utterly depressed when they came back (both crying) because it was over and kept complaining how they want to do it again but have "run out of money" and now are back in this dump (their workplace) and feel like life absolutely sucks.

That's why I'm against one off experiences like that. They should have bought something that would last especially since that is literally 3 months of their full time wage that they spent an entire year saving for (thus saving 25% of their income for the holiday and blowing the other 75% on clubbing). If I could give them advice (I won't, it's their life) I would tell them to save all their money, invest and build up a passive income of $2,000 a week (over the next 10 years) so they can go on a permanent holiday lifestyle around the world with limitless funds so they never have to work again and the holiday will never end thus they have their perfect life 100% of the time as opposed to less than 10% of the time. In the meantime buy something, an object and use it to keep themselves happy for long periods of time so they don't have to go on holidays together to have fun, do something that's cheaper and easier to maintain and if it's something free that's Awesome! They can still have fun say, hang gliding together but SAVE YOUR MONEY!

So what do you get out of judging what other people spend money on?  I know a lot of people on this site enjoy doing that, but unless these people are asking you about how to retire early, I really don't see the point of getting worked up over something like this.  Not everyone has the same interests, goals, and abilities as you.  It just seems to make you unhappier, and why would you want that?

The people you mention do seem pretty immature to me - based on what you say about their 'depression' and 'dump of a workplace', but not because of what they choose to spend their money on.  More mature people find ways to be happy in their daily life, and experiences only enhance that.  As an adult, I can't say that I ever cried over an experience being over.

I personally spent $8k on a honeymoon in my early twenties (for a marriage that didn't last).  No regrets.  It was still a great experience (much better than the "stuff" wedding presents we got!), and I'm really glad that I splurged a little and did it, instead of cheaping out like I tend to do.  It was money we saved and was well spent - we both returned to work happy, not depressed, but that's because we already had a positive outlook on our lives before the trip.

But I wouldn't trade a full set of All-Clad for standing on top of a ridge watching the sun rise over the ocean with 3 of the people I adore most in the world.  The happiness that flooded over me just typing that makes it all worth it.

Same here - and you made me happy just describing it (probably because I am remembering similar experiences).

[Schaefer Light]

Definitely experiences for me.  That may have something to do with the fact that I already own all the objects I really need and/or want, though.  If I didn't have enough money to afford the objects that I really wanted, then I might lean more towards objects.

[GuitarStv]

Definitely experiences for me.  That may have something to do with the fact that I already own all the objects I really need and/or want, though.  If I didn't have enough money to afford the objects that I really wanted, then I might lean more towards objects.

See, you just indicated that you've prioritized objects over experiences.  You have already got all the objects you want, so they must have been a higher priority for you to acquire than experiences.  Wouldn't that mean that experiences are less important?  Would you trade all of those objects that you currently own for more experiences?  If not, how do you justify your answer?

[FatCat]

I already own all the material items I want so I would choose to spend an extra $10k on experiences. I tend to buy material objects that I think would enrich my daily life experiences.  I'm currently content with the items I own. If anything I'd rather own less items.

If my PC was a piece of crap that was barely hobbling along and crashing all the time, then I would buy a new PC over a vacation because the upgraded PC would improve my every day life experience. If my washing machine was broken, I couldn't enjoy spending the money on a trip when it would have been better spent on a new washer. The negative impact of not having a clothes washer would be worse than the positive effect of enjoying a trip.

That being said, I would pick a vacation experience over designer clothing or luxury items that don't add any extra functionality or enjoyment to my life. I don't like spending more and more money on items that are only slightly improving my quality of life. The "experience" of knowing my jeans cost $300 doesn't add any enjoyment to my life. My jeans are perfectly fine. I doubt the quality is that much better to be worth several times the cost of the jeans I normally buy. A lot of high income earners I know just buy more expensive versions of things they already own. I don't really see the appeal of this. I know plenty of people who would answer the OP question with something like, "I'd buy a $10k <insert designer> handbag!" without a moment's hesitation. They would also say that aforementioned handbag is "worth every penny."

I actually find long trips abroad to be enriching to my life. If you don't care about them, then don't bother with them. $10k would buy me a lot more vacation experiences than it does for some people.


tl;dr: I value material items over experiences until I have accumulated enough material items to meet my needs and wants. Then I shift to valuing experiences over extra material accumulation.

[Schaefer Light]

Definitely experiences for me.  That may have something to do with the fact that I already own all the objects I really need and/or want, though.  If I didn't have enough money to afford the objects that I really wanted, then I might lean more towards objects.

See, you just indicated that you've prioritized objects over experiences.  You have already got all the objects you want, so they must have been a higher priority for you to acquire than experiences.  Wouldn't that mean that experiences are less important?  Would you trade all of those objects that you currently own for more experiences?  If not, how do you justify your answer?

Good point.  Maybe objects are more highly prioritized.  I certainly think that having a home (an object) is more important than going on a vacation (an experience).  Maybe I should re-phrase my statement..."since I already have all the objects I want, I now prefer spending my money on experiences." 

I would also say the fewer material desires you have, the sooner you can get to this point.  If I felt the need to have a brand new car or really expensive clothes, then I couldn't afford to have as many fun experiences.  Put another way, I'd rather have an old set of golf clubs and play more golf than have a brand new set of clubs and be unable to afford to play on a regular basis.

[Jersey Brett]

Objects. Many many shiny objects.

[z6_esb]

i would buy a $5000 road bike and a $5000 mountain bike (including all necessary assecories).  I would be thrilled with my stuff and the memories they create are priceless.  Not to mention the fitness, new places I could see, and all of that. 

Or, maybe, take my current road bike and do a Swiss Alps tour or something. 

Sooo, the answer to What's more important?  YES

[mathlete]

It depends. =D

The marginal utility of 15 extra $1K vacations doesn't beat the marginal utility of going from owning zero cars to owning one car.

[Rural]

Land. I'd immediately offer the elderly neighbor down the road who owns it $10k for the .86 acres that was cut out of the 25 we own thirty or so years ago and that contains three ramshackle structures that would be condemned in any incorporated area and one currently-out-of-prison methhead who is living in what seems to be the least leaky of them, a 10 x 10 shed. We already have the backhoe to knock over the structures, so no money out there. Also would use the backhoe to dig out the culvert that gives the parcel a driveway, which should discourage re-squatting a bit.


$10k is screamingly more than it's worth and should (might) get fast results despite an historical reluctance to sell. One of the structures, a roughly 30 year old mobile home, was bought and installed to house elderly neighbor's oldest daughter, formerly one of the methhead regulars there - she will likely never get out of prison/ halfway house again, but that's hard to bring oneself to admit, I know. Daughter is around 50 years old at this point.


We'd have to use a strategy to get the current methhead (daiughter's husband or ex, we think) to leave for a while so we could do the knocking over, but our usual strategy is waiting for him to get arrested again, and it generally works in a matter of weeks.


If I were to get the $10k in a couple years, when the structures will inevitably have fallen in of their own accord, I'd use the $10k to pave the steepest part of our road in instead - $10k won't do it all.

[Bajadoc]

You are creating a false dichotomy. Objects can create valuable experiences. The reverse is less true, but experiences can lead one to purchase objects, e.g. you go to an opening at an art gallery and purchase something. Or a concert and you purchase a t-shirt. That object then reminds you of the meaningful experience you had.

I don't find importance in objects that don't lead to meaningful experiences, but most objects do. Objects in the kitchen lead me to have a pleasant experience eating the food I have prepared. A television enables me to watch an enjoyable program. Yes, I know this is sometimes anathema on here, but it doesn't make it any less true for those of us who actually enjoy watching quality television shows.

In essence, both are important to a meaningful life. You are also somehow implying here that experiences need be monetary, e.g. travel or a concert. But obviously we Mustachians know that some of the best experiences in life are free.

I think you have it figured out. I'm going with this. Thanks.

[Argyle]

You haven't gone further and asked why experiences are generally considered more valuable than objects.  The academics who've studied this say that it's generally because of the people and relationships they foster.  I notice most of the folks who've chosen experiences on this thread mention the people they had those experiences with.  Going to see a football game with family who've flown in the experience — great experience.  Going to see the same football game on your own, where you don't know anyone in the audience — not so great.

As for the co-workers who spent three months in Europe and had such a great time that they griped about being  back — surely the answer is not "Don't have such a great experience and then you won't feel let down.  Buy some pricey consumer goods instead."  Their mistake was not going to Europe, but spending lavishly while they were there so that they were broke and couldn't go again.