A wise friend of mine once told me: If you wait until you're ready to have kids, you'll never have them.
Sounds like a good motto. I shall continue to delay indefinitely - maybe that can be by new excuse for people who put their nose where it doesn't belong.
"I'm waiting until I'm ready (which I never intend to be)."
I want to hear the following from you all:
-When you had (or plan to have) kids
-What age you feel is best to have kids and why
-Any other opinions / input
Thanks in advance, I look forward to hearing from you all!
- never had kids
- no age is best just don't have them
- save the planet have a great life and whenever you need a "kid moment" just borrow one from a friend or relative it's amazing how happy they are to share! ;)
This is my favorite response so far...I would have loved to be borrowed out to family or family friends as a child - it might have given me a little stability.
But here's my input:
-When [do] you
had (or plan to have) kids
I don't.
-What age you feel is best to have kids and why
Whenever you're ready. My mother had children from the start of her twenties to the end of her thirties (I think 39 was the last one). She had 6, her mother had 12, so if I change my mind (before menopause) I have little concern about 'waiting too long'. Medical science is advancing quickly and maternal outcomes for people who can afford high quality health care are ever improving. If fertility is a concern then there's always egg freezing (if you're willing to deal with the discomfort and the bill). As for why: I don't think it's a good idea to have children before you're prepared. I didn't enjoy my childhood. I suspect this is because my mother didn't intend five of her six pregnancies (and resulting children), both parents were 'trapped' in abusive relationships, and they were not prepared financially, emotionally or otherwise for children.
-Any other opinions / input
To plagiarize MMM - Great News: You’re Allowed To Forego Kids! (I know he said
Great News: You’re Allowed To Have Only One Kid! but stick with me a moment.)
For some people it's just an assumption that they will do it. But it's not mandatory. If you know it's something you really want, you've considered it thoroughly, then I wish you all the best and I'm glad to see you actively planning rather than spinning the wheel as my parents did.
I don't consider reproduction to be a moral imperative. On a philosophical level, I sort of think it's amoral or potentially even immoral to force a sentient being into existence. This doesn't seem to be considered very widely or is overridden by religious doctrine and holdovers.