The COL things makes the people living in HCOL areas lose their minds on every message board I have ever been on (ok, thats only 3.)
I am not familiar with every professional salary out there, obviously. But of those that I am, yes you make more in a HCOL. But not *that* much more. 36K a year raise for HCOL area? Great except that 30%+ is gone to taxes, plus maybe more to high city taxes in expensive cities, and you might be paying 5-10K more a year in property taxes for a similar sized house, your day to day expenses might be considerably higher for groceries and car insurance and daycare and ... Plus the mortgage or rent itself is higher. So are you really better off than your salary before the move?
If you made 75K before moving to a HCOL area, and now make 106K, you are UMC in both locations. Gold star for you.
If you made 39K before, and now make 75K in a HCOL, I find that amazing, and I am genuinely curious what job almost doubles your salary by moving LCOL---> HCOL. Because I have not seen that in online anecdotes or IRL. So please tell me about it so I can learn.
I went from 61k to 97k+bonus (likely ~105k in my first full year, given prorated raise/COL/bonus over 14-15mo instead of 12).
My AZ house is getting rented, so no worries there. I'm renting a room from a friend for $750/mo all-inclusive. Food costs are similar here. Gas is cheaper. I'm not paying property taxes because I'm renting a room, not buying a house. Car insurance is a lot higher (~$74/mo increase, given I am insured on my friends' cars and I bought a car here as well, since I'm kind of a car snob and refuse to bring my nice rust-free desert cars into road salt).
New job:
Slightly higher 401k match, but since base salary is higher it ends up being an extra $1562/yr.
$500/yr free HSA money
$910/yr cell phone reimbursement (no receipts required, so I can have any plan I want)
Extra holidays (day after Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve are days off)
4 weeks vacation (I had two weeks before)
Better insurance rates (I pay $338/yr now, prior was ~$864)
Paid short term / long term disability (was a couple bucks before)
Paid vision (was a couple bucks before)
So ~$36k plus ~$4k in other extras/reduced fees, not to mention doubling my vacation time and intangible upsides (I have a huge learning opportunity here and a massive reduction in stress).
So yes, I really am better off than my salary before the move. If you're making enough that $36k makes little difference to you, congratulations - I hope to be there someday.