Author Topic: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?  (Read 9333 times)

offroad

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Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« on: October 03, 2012, 09:23:54 PM »
So share your stories of the great woman in your life who is an asset.  Who are these badass woman?

1)  House costs $250,000 in many common markets in the USA.  So you have to have one, or not,  to have most woman be happy?

2)  A good education for your two kids is going to cost you $100,000 a piece, so $200,000 total.

3)  Several distant land vacations will set you back at least $50,000 over several years of your life.

 So tell tales of the spouse that does not want that highly expensive future?  Who clearly has a strong grasp that unless you are born with that silver spoon in mouth, you should never strive for those three major life expenses above. 

Let the inspirational comments begin.
« Last Edit: October 04, 2012, 08:37:02 AM by offroad »

prosaic

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #1 on: October 03, 2012, 09:37:49 PM »
So you are having trouble finding the right woman?

happy

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #2 on: October 03, 2012, 09:46:30 PM »
As a woman, I'm finding your sexist stereotype a little insulting. Didn't we sort this out in the '60s?

prosaic

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #3 on: October 03, 2012, 09:51:27 PM »
As a woman, I'm finding your sexist stereotype a little insulting. Didn't we sort this out in the '60s?

I wish I could read this, but my pregnant belly and bare feet get in the way as I get my husband's slippers and martini ready. :(

Jamesqf

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #4 on: October 03, 2012, 10:02:27 PM »
1)  House costs $250,000 in many common markets in the USA.  So your have to have one to have most woman be happy.

Sorry, but I had to have the house (and land) for ME to be happy.  Cost was well under $250K when I bought it (over a decade ago), through it's probably worth more now.

Quote
2)  A good education for your two kids is going to cost you $100,000 a piece, so $200,000 total.

Nonsense.  If I had kids, they would be going to the local state university (where I got my degrees) for a lot less (unless of course they got full-ride scholarships elsewhere), and working to pay a good share of their own expenses.

kkbmustang

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #5 on: October 03, 2012, 10:10:32 PM »
This may take the title of The Most Offensive MMM Forum Post yet.

AlexK

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #6 on: October 03, 2012, 10:36:53 PM »
Somebody is having woman problems.

I am recently married at age 38 but I felt your pain, most of the women I was meeting were very materialistic (of course they said the opposite). I finally found a good one. The trick is to filter them out quickly. Be honest and tell her your life ambitions. She will get out of there quick if she's a mall queen.

Mine happily lives with me in a $50k mobile home and saves over 50% of her income. I'm at 80% and we haven't merged our finances yet but she's coming around as she sees the freedom money in the bank buys. Our vacations are always road trips and involve camping half the time or more. I meticulously track my monthly expenses and when we were married in August it wasn't even a spike on the graph (eloped to Glacier Point at Yosemite). Her ring is CZ not diamond and she's OK with that.

arebelspy

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #7 on: October 03, 2012, 10:55:29 PM »
My wife is more frugal than I am, and makes (slightly) more money than I do.

If I was single, I'd have a lower savings rate and a lot longer FIRE time.

She is supportive in everything and a great ally.  I could not do what I want to without her, and I would not be nearly as happy.

We backpacked through Europe together, so she's willing to "rough it."  She's an extremely hard worker.

(This is aside from all of her other amazing qualities, smart, beautiful, optimistic, funny, etc.)

She's one of a kind though, and taken.  Sorry.

I do think there are others like her though, and I don't think most women are like what is described in the OP.  Maybe the problem you're having isn't with women, but yourself.
« Last Edit: October 04, 2012, 07:43:13 AM by arebelspy »
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offroad

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #8 on: October 04, 2012, 04:31:29 AM »
AlexK & Arebelspy - thank you very inspirational and the comments I was hoping for.  Know they are out there. Also know that some can be educated to change ways.

kkbmustang - yes it seems I was baiting for comments.  But unfortunately our society as educated in high school and college and media, is very very screwed up about financial knowledge.  Especially for the female side of the house.  Of course my personal opinion of females is not this poorly biased.  But there are beacons of light in the wilderness.  Wish there was a mandatory high school course for all in financial badassity.  The USA would turn around in ten years. 

bo_knows

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #9 on: October 04, 2012, 05:41:33 AM »
My wife is my rock.  She's also an overachiever, is more frugal than she realizes, and makes good money.  I keep track of the general finances for us, and she was shocked to learn that we save 50% of our salary.  She just runs that way.

I guess I'm lucky?  She's awesome.

WaxOnWaxOff

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #10 on: October 04, 2012, 05:51:26 AM »
This may take the title of The Most Offensive MMM Forum Post yet.

Agreed. O.o

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #11 on: October 04, 2012, 06:44:28 AM »
Wow! Can I tell you about the great man in my life who is not a financial liability? In my experience women need to protect themselves from men just as much. If only everyone were invested in their own financial future, but some people just don't care.

I'm the money manager in our marriage, the one who has owned property before and investigates the best ways to invest and preserve our money. My husband is great at making money and saving money, but otherwise just doesn't care for the fiddling. And that's fine. Together we do a lot better than we would apart, financially and otherwise. And he takes care of all sorts of things that are not strengths for me.

Orvell

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #12 on: October 04, 2012, 06:50:16 AM »
As a woman, I'm finding your sexist stereotype a little insulting. Didn't we sort this out in the '60s?

I wish I could read this, but my pregnant belly and bare feet get in the way as I get my husband's slippers and martini ready. :(
*DIES* A++++

Matt K

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #13 on: October 04, 2012, 06:54:37 AM »
You've got this all wrong.

We men are the liability. We want toys (cars, motorcycles, boats, big power tools we never use), big houses for our man caves to keep all our toys, and we need all the money for multiple trips to Vegas in a life time (where it is a competition to see who can lose the most money on gambling, booze, and strippers).

Not only do I find the original post sexist, it is also stupidly pessimistic.
Quote
Who clearly has a strong grasp that unless you are born with that silver spoon in mouth, you should never strive for those three major life expenses above.

Seriously, you have to be born into wealth to want to own a house, or provide an education for your children, or travel? Come closer so I can punch you in the face. And I don't mean that in the friendly MMM way. We are lucky to live in a world where everyone should be able to do any or all of those things with hard work and careful planning.

mbz I just about spilt my breakfast reading your reply.

Offroad, presuming you aren't trolling, let's try rewording your post so it isn't offensive. And maybe "share your badassity" would be a better forum than "Throw down the gauntlet".

Quote
Fellas, I'm having a hard time finding a woman who shares my values. Inspire me with stories of the women in your life who are more bad ass and have more facial hair (in the good MrsMM way) than you.

Norman Johnson

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #14 on: October 04, 2012, 07:29:28 AM »
Please let this be a troll. :/

If it's not, I am the great woman in my life. That's my inspirational comment.

velocistar237

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #15 on: October 04, 2012, 07:56:07 AM »
Especially for the female side of the house.

Sounds like you have a bias you need to fix before you start a relationship. When you meet a frugal woman, she's probably not going to like it when you tell her that you're glad she overcame her womanly wastefulness.

We men are the liability. We want toys (cars, motorcycles, boats, big power tools we never use)

This. I'm often tempted by the next toy, but my wife's wants are frugal and practical.

corcoran

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #16 on: October 04, 2012, 08:02:13 AM »
Please let this be a troll. :/

If it's not, I am the great woman in my life. That's my inspirational comment.

I agree, this is not a 'throwing down the guantlet' topic, furthermore it is complainy pants, presumptuous, and offensive.

I'm 32 and single, and I live in Southern California and I'm optimistic. In my city 250k might buy you only a plot of land. The op complaint doesn't even begin to make sense as others have already pointed out. We (regardless of gender) need to reflect upon our own shortcomings and sort them out first, and realize how we can improve on ourselves.

offroad

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #17 on: October 04, 2012, 08:12:37 AM »
Yes this is a "troll" controversial topic.  For those who comment, did you read the rest of the responses BEFORE you had to through out an answer.

Half of the responses are positive, and showing that there are many outstanding examples of female partner, and male partner Badassity.  But is the badassity movement a microscopic piece of a society at a whole, who can not educate their populous hoard?

Hope you are pressing the REPORT A CONCERN button.  Let me know.  HOVERING over the delete topic button as half of responders can not read context (the whole story) and are very extremely quick to judge.  Should we put a judge dread helmit on a few folks, and a target on me yet?   

AJ

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #18 on: October 04, 2012, 08:31:34 AM »
Here's the thing: the type of woman you describe is just not going to be attracted to someone with the kind of sexist attitude you display.

I am both the breadwinner and the frugalista of the house. My hubby is the financial liability (though I wouldn't trade him for the world). If I were looking for a mate, I wouldn't touch someone with your attitude with a 10 foot pole. IME, other financially savvy women feel the same.

I would give to you the same advice I received before finding my mate: you need to *be* the kind of person who attracts the kind of women you want. A better question for you to have posed to this group would have been "Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?" and then try to be that person. *That* is the guy that will get the savvy women, not a sexist complainy-pants.

Norman Johnson

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Re: Woman who are not half million dollar liability?
« Reply #19 on: October 04, 2012, 08:35:15 AM »
I think you needed to consider your audience. I don't find it controversial to talk about this, I find it repulsive that there are people left out there than still think that women are a liability (and a money sucking one at that!) in a relationship and not a partner.

You weren't born married, you don't have to get married and honestly, I suggest you figure out why you see all women as a homogenous group of money suckers before you go out and inflict your attitude on the dating population.

Now, if you were asking where all the frugal women hang out, that's a completely different question and didn't require the bitter list about women who want to gobble up money.

offroad

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #20 on: October 04, 2012, 08:42:08 AM »
Good suggestion AJ - changed the title.   Modify a few key words.  Hope that is less ugly of a description.

Always find it interesting about positive and negative communications.  How to not be trollish, while still getting people to read and respond on a controversial subject.  Politics would be a bad direction for me, without mastery of when and when not to push buttons. 


smalllife

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #21 on: October 04, 2012, 08:54:47 AM »
So share your stories of the great woman in your life who is an asset.  Who are these badass woman?

1)  House costs $250,000 in many common markets in the USA.  So you have to have one, or not,  to have most woman be happy?

2)  A good education for your two kids is going to cost you $100,000 a piece, so $200,000 total.

3)  Several distant land vacations will set you back at least $50,000 over several years of your life.

 So tell tales of the spouse that does not want that highly expensive future?  Who clearly has a strong grasp that unless you are born with that silver spoon in mouth, you should never strive for those three major life expenses above. 

Let the inspirational comments begin.

1) I bought my own home for much less and have no desire for the suburban life-style.
2) I don't want kids - ever.  25% of women make it to 40 without being burdened with motherhood, so you're excluding a sizable portion of the female population. 
3) You can travel on the cheap, or not at all, or locally. 

Why should I strive for any of the above?  I did in fact buy a house, but I will never ever have kids or go on fancy vacations.  I'm much happier at home or exploring a new city on the cheap.

It's frankly quite insulting that any woman who takes half a second to contemplate her future and decides that any of the above aren't for her is "inspirational". 


sideways8

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #22 on: October 04, 2012, 09:25:37 AM »
O_o This rubbed me the wrong way. Perhaps it's because I come from a long line of strong, independent women or because my prior relationship was with a financially disabled man-boy who found video games and weed to be better investments than paying his own bills. I don't think you will find many gold digging women on this forum so you may want to ask about these requirements elsewhere. For what it's worth, here is what I am and what I look for:

I'm 28, never been married, and am 99% sure I don't want kids.

1. The house. Mine is not huge (1000 square feet) but it feels much bigger when I'm trying to clean it! My yard is a good size (1/3 acre) that allows decent space for my dogs to run around. It was $130,000. I grew up in a huge house and have no desire to pay extra taxes and money for more stuff to clean.

2. No kids, no problem. :P

3. Yes, I would like to go to Europe some day but I'm not going to die a bitter soul if that doesn't happen. I dislike flying anyways. My own country is huge and I haven't even seen the damn Grand Canyon yet. I haven't even visited our neighbors to the north or south yet. I'd rather go on a vacation where we can share a picnic lunch on a hike versus dining at a 5 star restaurant in a big fancy city. Nature doesn't care if I belch or lick my fingers.

I'm not looking for a free ride or a gold plated life. I'm looking for someone to join me in my journey so that it becomes OUR journey. I'm very lucky to have a boyfriend who fits what I look for. He's smart, funny, has a stable job, lives on his own, has his own interests, and expresses desire to retire early. He is also very handy and is a DIY type guy, which is a huge bonus! I'm learning new things from him all the time.

gdborton

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #23 on: October 04, 2012, 09:42:29 AM »
I think this is largely a perspective problem, if the OP was a female we'd be looking at a post about cars, electronics, and other machismo bullshit.

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It's frankly quite insulting that any woman who takes half a second to contemplate her future and decides that any of the above aren't for her is "inspirational".

Maybe this is indeed insulting to you, but I do think that it is inspirational.  Women (and men) who don't try to live outside their means are pretty rare (obv not here, this is the MMM forum), it isn't a stereotype but a fact.  If you live the frugal life, I 100% believe that you should try to be an inspiration/role person to anyone thinking they can buy the half million dollar houses, the yearly iPhone, lavish vacations, and still retire comfortably.

People today are brainwashed into consumerism, this post could easily be flipped to talk about males.  Try to think about this from a single person's perspective,  our options are quite slim if FIRE really is important to us.

Norman Johnson

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #24 on: October 04, 2012, 09:48:37 AM »
People today are brainwashed into consumerism, this post could easily be flipped to talk about males.  Try to think about this from a single person's perspective,  our options are quite slim if FIRE really is important to us.

If the OP had said partners or spouses or some other neutral term and made a list that had stereotypes from both genders, I would not have been offended. Assuming that women cost $500K because they want houses, babies and expensive property is offensive. And to post that to a board that should be full of other MMM-types is just ignorant or trollish.

Quote from:  offroad
Yes this is a "troll" controversial topic.

If the OP wanted to know where all the single frugal ladies are hiding why not just ask instead of posting some sort of offensive list trying to be controversial?

GuitarStv

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #25 on: October 04, 2012, 10:09:04 AM »
Our house cost 380k.  We don't really go on vacations out of the country.  If you want kids, the expenses that you'll pay for them are justified by the happiness they bring you.  FWIW, I'm a husband who wanted to buy a house and have kids . . . my wife is hard working and frugal enough to help me make those dreams affordable.

In any relationship you're going to value certain things more than your partner . . . the key to a healthy relationship is to talk it out, prioritise what's most important to each of you, come up with compromises that work, and move toward the common goal of keeping everyone happy.

smalllife

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #26 on: October 04, 2012, 10:23:07 AM »

Quote
It's frankly quite insulting that any woman who takes half a second to contemplate her future and decides that any of the above aren't for her is "inspirational".

Maybe this is indeed insulting to you, but I do think that it is inspirational.  Women (and men) who don't try to live outside their means are pretty rare (obv not here, this is the MMM forum), it isn't a stereotype but a fact.  . . Try to think about this from a single person's perspective,  our options are quite slim if FIRE really is important to us.

I was more insulted that he thought all women wanted kids than the over consumption stereotype.  There is a sizable minority of women who have no desire to bear or raise a child, Mustachian principles notwithstanding. 

And for the record I am single.  I would not touch a man who merely saw me as a vessel to carry his sperm, but I would certainly give a stereotypical spender a chance.  Children you cannot compromise on, money you can. 

I do not think it is inspirational to avoid a life you don't want any more than I think it is inspiration to not go to medical school if you do not want to be a doctor.  That was the point I was trying to make.   

gdborton

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #27 on: October 04, 2012, 10:30:52 AM »
Maybe I read into the post wrong, but I thought the children bit was more about splurging on private school/expensive college/private tutor rather than actually having kids.

smalllife

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #28 on: October 04, 2012, 10:43:38 AM »
Maybe I read into the post wrong, but I thought the children bit was more about splurging on private school/expensive college/private tutor rather than actually having kids.

We both read into it with different backgrounds and experiences.  Both are logical conclusions, but both are insulting ;-)

offroad

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #29 on: October 04, 2012, 11:06:34 AM »
Find the comments from persons being INSULTED over a discussion, insulting themselves.  There is no way to have discourse, and intelligent opinions discussed, without having some thicker skin. 

Do you know why God withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may
love you instead of laugh at you.
-- Mrs. Patrick Campbell (English actress)

A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times;
her intelligence, eight times.
-- Sanskrit proverb

There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think
there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I
know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked."
-- Jerry Seinfeld

A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers
after four kisses.
-- H.L. Mencken (American writer, 1888-1956)




Orvell

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #30 on: October 04, 2012, 11:13:57 AM »
Find the comments from persons being INSULTED over a discussion, insulting themselves.  There is no way to have discourse, and intelligent opinions discussed, without having some thicker skin. 

Do you know why God withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may
love you instead of laugh at you.
-- Mrs. Patrick Campbell (English actress)

A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times;
her intelligence, eight times.
-- Sanskrit proverb

There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think
there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I
know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked."
-- Jerry Seinfeld

A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers
after four kisses.
-- H.L. Mencken (American writer, 1888-1956)
You ARE joking, right?
It is difficult to see because this is the internet, but % would indicate around half your readers are in fact women. Women who, by the nature of BEING here, do not fit your stereotypes and, yes, are insulted by them.
Because they are insulting.

Misstachian

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #31 on: October 04, 2012, 11:31:17 AM »
I'm a lady. I'd like to own a home and land someday, I'd like to help my hypothetical children with their hypothetical educations, and I enjoy traveling. My husband wants all of that too, if possible.

However, I'm also the saver in our relationship while he is a natural spender; we know we have these goals that are expensive. So each month we put a bit away for a future downpayment, a smaller bit away for an eventual vacation, and when my nana passed away and left me some money, I earmarked it for expenses for a future child, because I thought nothing would make her happier than knowing she'd helped make a future grandbaby a little more secure. I like to think that I am quite an asset to my husband and our family, and through my support and cheerleading, he's now out of credit card debt, paying down student loans, saving money for both retirement and fun shorter term goals, and generally moving toward a more MMM way of being.

In a mate I looked for someone who was smart, thoughtful, kind, funny, gentle, generous, and a good cook. He wasn't an expert with money, but not everyone is obsessed with Roth IRAs in their younger years and feels pain at the parting of a dollar (like many of us in this community feel naturally). He is coming around, and I have a wonderful partner.

Given that I do want some of those things you scorn, I guess I wouldn't be for you! But that's okay, sounds like it wouldn't work out. :)

velocistar237

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #32 on: October 04, 2012, 11:40:43 AM »
You can find a lot of quality women in places that emphasize community and competence rather than stuff and appearances. Join community organizations, volunteer as staff for a local running race, participate in a neighborhood cleanup, do administrative work for the local maker space, etc. I met my wife playing music at church.

matchewed

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #33 on: October 04, 2012, 03:41:29 PM »
OP my recommendation is to just leave the post as your initial question. Your examples are pretty offensive and stereotypical. It may have not been the intent but it clearly states the following -
  • Most women want an expensive house to be happy.
  • Women want their child to have a 200k education.
    • Women want extravagant vacations.

    (Stupid formatting)

    Several men or women may or may not follow this. Just give a nice friendly shout out to the Badass women in your lives. :)

c

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #34 on: October 04, 2012, 04:45:09 PM »
Ha, yes those awful women who want a reasonably priced home, well educated children and to expand their horizons. They'll be the downfall of mankind.

A couple of years ago I watched a piece on how women entering the workforce in India is eroding the culture of arranged marriages, making it harder for men to find wives the traditional way, and how men were essentially having to up their game to get a wife.

One of the men they interviewed said something along the lines of "women are so materialistic these days, they all want big screen TVs". It was interesting to watch as the men of more means used these things to show what a great catch they were, but the men of lesser means used them to show how greedy and materialistic women were.

kisserofsinners

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #35 on: October 04, 2012, 05:27:29 PM »
Find the comments from persons being INSULTED over a discussion, insulting themselves.  There is no way to have discourse, and intelligent opinions discussed, without having some thicker skin. 

Do you know why God withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may
love you instead of laugh at you.
-- Mrs. Patrick Campbell (English actress)

A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times;
her intelligence, eight times.
-- Sanskrit proverb

There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think
there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I
know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked."
-- Jerry Seinfeld

A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers
after four kisses.
-- H.L. Mencken (American writer, 1888-1956)

You really would be better served by stopping now. All this back peddling and trying to justify what was clearly a poorly presented discussion is putting your foot further down your throat.

I'll concede that maybe you didn't mean to come off as a misogynist, but here we are. When the lions share of the replies are telling you you're being egregiously dismissive, general, and kind of a jerk; maybe you should listen and re-assess *your* attitude.

prosaic

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #36 on: October 04, 2012, 08:48:19 PM »

Find the comments from persons being INSULTED over a discussion, insulting themselves.  There is no way to have discourse, and intelligent opinions discussed, without having some thicker skin. 

The fact that you have managed to provoke a cross section of largely negative responses to your OP, which was quite objectively misogynistic and sexist (yes, both!) AND that both men and woman replied with negative reactions to your sexist assumptions would, to an introspective person who is seriously pursuing personal growth, be a clue that something was amiss in your presentation of whatever point you're trying to make.

In other words: women aren't inherently worse with money. They don't inherently want to spend more than men. You make that assumption and then ask/troll for responses to a question that has an assumed premise up front that any fairly modern, Mustachian woman (and most of the men) is going to find eye rolling and, yes, insulting.

Guys like you (see? It sucks when people over generalize or stereotype, doesn't it?) who, when called to the mat, come back on the attack and gaslight ("I am insulted you're insulted!") or who denigrate perfectly rational responses as somehow not being appropriate discourse simply because you aren't able to reinforce your need for validation by getting it from others are "that guy" women avoid.

Hint: discourse involves two people exhibiting mutual respect while communicating and seeking a deeper understanding of each other's position with an ultimate goal of leaving the situation enriched. If you can't do that on a message board, how can you do that IRL with the right woman you seek?
« Last Edit: October 04, 2012, 08:49:57 PM by mbz »

totoro

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #37 on: October 04, 2012, 09:06:02 PM »
Wow.  I just realized how happy I am to be with someone who would be as puzzled as I am about why someone would even ask these questions.

arebelspy

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #38 on: October 04, 2012, 09:14:21 PM »
I think we've piled on to the OP enough.

Let's give him the benefit of the doubt that he was frustrated about the type of women he has been meeting and projected that to all women in his frustration, and consequently he chose some poor wording.

I think the point has been sufficiently made that the vast majority is in disagreement with his statement that came off as quite sexist and we can move on from here without adding any further negativity, right?
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Russ

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #39 on: October 04, 2012, 09:25:00 PM »
Sure thing Rebel. On a more "inspirational" note, while I got my investing brains from my dad, all my frugality muscles come from my mom. She's definitely the more badass of the two, according to the way of the mustache. It's pretty cool seeing them manage their finances together, their individual skills complement each other very well.

okits

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #40 on: October 04, 2012, 10:09:27 PM »
I agree with the, ah, constructive pointers others have given before me, so I have a suggestion.

Have you tried online dating?  It's how I met someone with similar values, one of the many benefits being that our spending and saving behaviors are compatible without any effort.  If I were still looking I would definitely list early retirement as one of my interests and mention MMM's blog (if not already a Mustachian, you might spark a lady's interest in becoming one.)

Communicating with someone online, first, will help you quickly figure out if someone requires a date to be $80 worth of fancy cocktails, or if she's open to a picnic in a park, a walking tour of your city (often free, or DIY), a bike ride, etc.

Of course, frequenting forums where people with shared interests can communicate is also a way I've seen people come together.

Don't give up, and use your optimism gun when you get discouraged.  Remember that every single Mustachian with a wonderful mate was once single and looking (and so was their other half.)

offroad

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #41 on: October 05, 2012, 09:57:45 AM »
Gaunlet was thrown down.  Challenge was taken and the fight ensued.  Got punched a few times.  Learned a few things in this forum-venue.  OP is done with the topic.  But truely do appreciate the spirit of all responders.

arebelspy

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Re: Mustachian Ladies - what do you look for in a mate?
« Reply #42 on: October 06, 2012, 01:07:54 PM »
MODERATOR NOTE: Topic was locked by OP, not mods.  If someone would like to make a new discussion thread around some of the more positive themes suggested by several posters in this thread, feel free to do so.  Cheers!
We are two former teachers who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, and now travel the world full time with two kids.
If you want to know more about me, or how we did that, or see lots of pictures, this Business Insider profile tells our story pretty well.
We (occasionally) blog at AdventuringAlong.com.
You can also read my forum "Journal."