I didn't decide to start spending. Rather, I have until now been spending and I am working towards no spending. I think my goal was overly ambitious, at least as stated originally, lol.
I'm aware of my spending and working on it, thus the returns and encouraging friends to meet up at home. I def have the issue that in convincing my friends to have dinner at our apartments, we all feel obligated to bring food or drinks over to the hostess. With my last dinner invite, I tried bringing over sweets from a pastry shop which was both more thoughtful and also cheaper than bringing wine. That went really well and I think I'm going to do the dessert gift from now on. I'm sure the most accountable MMM would encourage me to make dessert at home from scratch.
It's pretty true that I'm not very interested in face punches, esp since I'm pretty vague about the specifics of what I'm buying. I'd rather have encouragement and good advice. I'm honest enough to know that I quit w/o encouragement. But what you said doesn't even sound too face punchy. Your comment about honesty and awareness really do ring true to me. How did you make the shift to not spend? Was it all at once or slowly cutting back? Also, how do you keep on the honesty?
I can also account for some of my 'spending is ok' in that I just started working and just paid off my debt so it feels like I deserve to spend. When I was working on paying off my debt or in school, I was much closer to no spending period. Not even spending on rent since it was covered by scholarships. I know I don't deserve to spend (no one deserves an excess of consumer stuff; we deserve a safe and stable home), but certainly the harm in spending is a lot less now and it's a relief to loosen the reigns a little since there's no emergency.
I think part of why I didn't stick as closely to the no spending is that I checked my honesty at the end of the month, rather than right before making the small purchases.