Maybe we are, maybe we aren't.
To first order, it sure seems that way. But think about how we (generally) live. We try not to buy useless crap, and hence produce less waste. We try to minimize or eliminate our driving needs, so we produce less CO2 emissions. And I'm sure that there are tons of other ways that we do better than the average taxpayer (better in some metric) that benefits society overall.
I really don't think it's just that simple. Your contributions to society are more than just through taxes.
My point of view is that you shouldn't feel bad using services that you are legally entitled to. If the system is set up in an odd way (like how those with $1M+ in the bank can still get ACA subsidies) then that's the fault of those who set up the system. The system should be built to expect rational actors who will try to maximize their benefits.
Hop on madamwitty's thread about FAFSA and the EFC, and you'll see people who can FIRE talk about ways to get the EFC calculation to spit out an automatic zero, despite the fact that they can clearly afford to pay more than that for their kids' educations. I don't see anything wrong with that - they are being rational actors working inside the confines of the law.
(Now I'm ranting a bit) but I do find it ironic when the average Joe, who in all likelihood makes quite an effort to minimize his own tax bill while still in the confines of the law (being a rational actor) hates businesses that engage in all sorts of legal accounting tricks to pay next to nothing in tax. The business is being a rational actor the same way that Joe is - minimizing taxes to maximize profits. If Joe is going to get riled up about that, blame the government who set up the corporate tax code, not the business.
Of course, I specifically said legal accounting tricks.