Feeling very different than my peers

[afuera]

I am a 24 y/o engineer and my husband is a 26 y/o engineer.  We were at dinner the other night with some friends at a fancypants burger joint that my husband and I rarely attend with two other young couples, all engineers.
My husband has been laid off so our friends nicely inquired how we are doing.  I said we are doing alright and that he hasn't gotten any interviews/offers yet but that we will be ok.  Finances came up and I mentioned that we had to make some changes but hopefully will get back on track soon.
Then I heard "Yea, if that happened to us we would have to refinance this and defer payment on that.  Don't know how you guys are surviving". They talked about student loans around 50K, credit card payments, car payments and outrageous grocery/restaurant spending.
After hearing that conversation it made me think.  Yes our income was cut in half and yes its been harder financially.
But we have zero debt.  Our 401ks and Roth IRAs have been maxed out for 2 years now.  We are still able to save >$1000 a month from our take home pay in other investments.
Reading this forum is easy to get caught up in how much more badass we could be and forget that we are actually doing much better than most others!

[HenryDavid]

Yup, you can lose perspective on just how hard people make their lives . . . without thinking about it.
Just blind habit really.
Meanwhile, living well within your means / Living well, within your means . . . makes life calm, simple, resilient, happy.

[Secretly Saving]

Pat yourself on the back and smile knowing that you have made the choices that allow you to be happy and relaxed despite the financial changes!

[SilveradoBojangles]

I feel the same! Someone commented recently that it much have been hard for my husband and I with both of us on grad student salaries for a while, and I was like, "Actually, it's been totally great. No problems." We've both had opportunities for side work along the way, but even in our lowest earning years we felt so wealthy because we have no debt, low expenses, have been able to contribute to our retirement funds, and squeeze in quite a lot of good food and travel. I don't even feel particularly badass in comparison to many of the people on this forum, but compared to our peers I guess we are.

[pachnik]

Yup, you can lose perspective on just how hard people make their lives . . . without thinking about it.
Just blind habit really.
Meanwhile, living well within your means / Living well, within your means . . . makes life calm, simple, resilient, happy.

I agree.  Some of my colleagues can't believe that I don't want an iphone.  I simply don't see the need for it  and also don't need to be connected at all times. 

[jaytomlinson]

It's usually easier to just pretend you're financially struggling since most people live paycheck to paycheck. And it also provides a good excuse to not spend money when around anti-Mustachian friends. Only a select few people know I'm pretty well off. Everyone else thinks I'm just poor.

[dividend hamster]

I know the feeling. If people who are still spending like maniacs try to tell me that I'm the stupid one, I show them this

https://youtu.be/b36j8ewaN2Y

and ask whether I should get the cup.

[libertarian4321]

Yup, you can lose perspective on just how hard people make their lives . . . without thinking about it.
Just blind habit really.
Meanwhile, living well within your means / Living well, within your means . . . makes life calm, simple, resilient, happy.

I agree.  Some of my colleagues can't believe that I don't want an iphone.  I simply don't see the need for it  and also don't need to be connected at all times.

I'm an engineer.  Been using computers since 1978.  I'm an "early adopter" of tech when I see a use for it.  I'm also a multi millionaire.

I do NOT have a "smart phone."  I just don't see the need for it.

So I have my "old school" flip phone.  My broke ass friends laugh at it, while talking on their (bought on credit) iPhone 5/6/8/12/17q or whatever the current model is.  And I shake my head as these well paid, but mostly broke, dumbasses quibble over who has the latest and coolest iWhatevertheHell.

I really wish I could give a damn, but I can't.  My flip phone makes phone calls just fine.  So why should I spend hundreds of dollars on a "smart phone?"

[albireo13]

I resisted smart phones for many years but, got an iPhone 2 years ago when I turned 58.
I don't do social media but I do like to use gps/navigation apps when traveling.   Otherwise I could be happy with a dumb phone.
I more often think of ditching cell phones all together.  I don't really want to be available or "connected" 24/7.  There's a time and place for everything.  Being on the phone included. 

At work I laugh to myself when I notice some people talking on their phones in the bathroom stalls!
Really??

[rageth]

I've told my family about my RE plan, and my wife told me that my sister in-law told her the other day that she thought it was "cute" that I thought that I was going to retire early. My brother and his wife easily have gross pay that is double that of mine and my wife's and they also easily spend triple what we do. Meanwhile our retirement accounts keep growing and we're just as happy with far less than they "need." It's really amazing just how well off we are because of our mindset here on MMM compared to the general population.

[TheAnonOne]

Yup, you can lose perspective on just how hard people make their lives . . . without thinking about it.
Just blind habit really.
Meanwhile, living well within your means / Living well, within your means . . . makes life calm, simple, resilient, happy.

I agree.  Some of my colleagues can't believe that I don't want an iphone.  I simply don't see the need for it  and also don't need to be connected at all times.

I'm an engineer.  Been using computers since 1978.  I'm an "early adopter" of tech when I see a use for it.  I'm also a multi millionaire.

I do NOT have a "smart phone."  I just don't see the need for it.

So I have my "old school" flip phone.  My broke ass friends laugh at it, while talking on their (bought on credit) iPhone 5/6/8/12/17q or whatever the current model is.  And I shake my head as these well paid, but mostly broke, dumbasses quibble over who has the latest and coolest iWhatevertheHell.

I really wish I could give a damn, but I can't.  My flip phone makes phone calls just fine.  So why should I spend hundreds of dollars on a "smart phone?"

I don't think your really an "Early Adopter" then. Unless you find no use in....

GPS-
Games-
Price Checks-
Recipe Lookups-
Social Media-
Holding the sum of human knowledge in your hand-


I get the financial argument, but lets not call yourself an early adopter and then dismiss the usefulness of the smart phone. Smart phone's are literally portable PCs that happen to also make calls.

[mlejw6]

I don't think your really an "Early Adopter" then. Unless you find no use in....

GPS-
Games-
Price Checks-
Recipe Lookups-
Social Media-
Holding the sum of human knowledge in your hand-

Ooh, I've got this. Let's see....
GPS - Useful, but I've got one (yes, it's separate, boo hoo)
Games - these are for FUN, not USE
Price Checks - I buy things if I think the price is fair, not if I think it's not
Recipe Lookups - Can use laptop at home, make grocery list, and look at cookbooks!
Social Media - Can use home computer - why in the world do I need this when I'm out and about???
Holding the sum of human knowledge in your hand - Eh, I have it in my computer at home or at work when I need it.

P.S. I actually have a smart phone (though not cell data) since it's only $12/mo. I just know it's a luxury.

[prognastat]

I don't think your really an "Early Adopter" then. Unless you find no use in....

GPS-
Games-
Price Checks-
Recipe Lookups-
Social Media-
Holding the sum of human knowledge in your hand-

Ooh, I've got this. Let's see....
GPS - Useful, but I've got one (yes, it's separate, boo hoo)
Games - these are for FUN, not USE
Price Checks - I buy things if I think the price is fair, not if I think it's not
Recipe Lookups - Can use laptop at home, make grocery list, and look at cookbooks!
Social Media - Can use home computer - why in the world do I need this when I'm out and about???
Holding the sum of human knowledge in your hand - Eh, I have it in my computer at home or at work when I need it.

P.S. I actually have a smart phone (though not cell data) since it's only $12/mo. I just know it's a luxury.

The flip side to this though is that many people can get by without a laptop instead using a smartphone for the things mentioned plus general web browsing and communication. You can get a decent smartphone for the same price or less than even a cheap chromebook. So as far as use goes you can get more use for less money out of a smartphone versus a laptop.

Now you can make a point that you may already have a laptop. But purely looking at it from a point where I didn't have a smartphone or laptop/pc then the smartphone would be the better value for a large portion of people.