Author Topic: Badass divorce plan  (Read 4751 times)

Roadrunner53

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Badass divorce plan
« on: March 16, 2018, 08:05:58 AM »
I heard this story thru someone and not from the actual person who did this. This couple had been married for probably 30 years.

She came into the marriage with a couple of kids and they finally left home. Then, strangely enough, she had two kids by this 2nd husband when she was in her late 30's or maybe even 40's. I guess it was an ugly marriage but she stuck it out till the kids were both around 18 years old. So here is where the plot thickens...

She rented a PO box and had the bills come to it. She stopped paying the mortgage and I am guessing other bills. She must have gotten final notice of foreclosure and took the money she didn't use for the mortgage payments and drained the savings account. She took off and rented an apartment. So then the hub finally finds out the house is getting foreclosed on and the bank account is drained! He ended up taking money out of his 401K to pay off what was owed. He was told nothing could be done about the money she took out of savings or the mortgage payment money. When they divorced, he had to pay her half the value of the house and his 401k. Not sure if she actually made out but she sure screwed him. He had no idea she was planning to leave either!

Guess you could call that a woman scorned!

lexde

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #1 on: March 16, 2018, 08:08:52 AM »
This is why I refuse to practice family law. Adults being complete children and screwing each other over at every opportunity doesn’t really count as “badass” in my book.

hdatontodo

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #2 on: March 16, 2018, 08:19:41 AM »
Trust but Verify

Roadrunner53

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #3 on: March 16, 2018, 08:20:19 AM »
Lexde, I am not sticking up for this woman but she was married to a horrible man and she didn't have a 'real' job. I think she worked under the table cleaning houses so she didn't have any money to support herself if she left. I guess she went into survival mode. I don't condone it but maybe it was a way for her to get a fresh start.

coldestcat

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #4 on: March 16, 2018, 09:19:21 AM »
thats okay, its a 3rd hand story, think of it as an email forward from aunt Gertrude. Did it even happen? probably not but its a better way to tell a story.

Roadrunner53

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #5 on: March 16, 2018, 09:33:08 AM »
Yes, the story is true. I spoke with the sister in law married to the brother of the divorced guy. Everyone was shocked.

MommyCake

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #6 on: March 16, 2018, 09:38:21 AM »
She must have took a lesson from my ex-husband.  While I was in the army stationed out of state he rented out our house, collected the rent, and stopped paying the mortgage.  I couldn't do a thing but divorce him. 

Jrr85

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #7 on: March 16, 2018, 09:45:34 AM »
I heard this story thru someone and not from the actual person who did this. This couple had been married for probably 30 years.

She came into the marriage with a couple of kids and they finally left home. Then, strangely enough, she had two kids by this 2nd husband when she was in her late 30's or maybe even 40's. I guess it was an ugly marriage but she stuck it out till the kids were both around 18 years old. So here is where the plot thickens...

She rented a PO box and had the bills come to it. She stopped paying the mortgage and I am guessing other bills. She must have gotten final notice of foreclosure and took the money she didn't use for the mortgage payments and drained the savings account. She took off and rented an apartment. So then the hub finally finds out the house is getting foreclosed on and the bank account is drained! He ended up taking money out of his 401K to pay off what was owed. He was told nothing could be done about the money she took out of savings or the mortgage payment money. When they divorced, he had to pay her half the value of the house and his 401k. Not sure if she actually made out but she sure screwed him. He had no idea she was planning to leave either!

Guess you could call that a woman scorned!

Or a sociopath? 

Also, probably not true because there wasn't "nothing that could be done."  Many judges would (appropriately) hammer a spouse like that in the divorce proceedings.  There are a lot of terrible family law judges, particularly biased in favor of women (but it can go either way), but actually putting the house into foreclosure to stash assets for herself?  Even terrible judges typically are not going to condone that. 

If she just blew the money in a not obvious way (or even an obvious way that's not obviously malevolent), that'd be a lot easier to claim innocence on, in which case ending up with half of the 401k and value of the house would be just typically what each spouse would get from a long marriage, as opposed to a screwing. 

mm1970

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #8 on: March 16, 2018, 02:06:41 PM »
This is why I refuse to practice family law. Adults being complete children and screwing each other over at every opportunity doesn’t really count as “badass” in my book.
MY FIL was a hometown lawyer and he was SO HAPPY when he got enough business to turn down divorces.  Oh the stories.

beekayworld

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #9 on: March 16, 2018, 04:15:30 PM »
...she was married to a horrible man...

I don't think he was a horrible man for four reasons.
1) She married him. She already had two children so she wasn't a naive 18-year-old. She'd had at least a multi-year relationship with an earlier man.
2) She brought two children into this new family headed by a "horrible man"?
3) She had two more children with him.
4) She waited until they were grown to leave him.

I'm interested in what her plan was after her first failed marriage/relationship? Even if it was to immediately find another man, I would think she'd at least want to develop some career skills (cosmetology school, accounting classes, etc.) to support her children while she was dating.

Roadrunner53

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #10 on: March 16, 2018, 04:43:42 PM »
Beekayworld, First of all you don't know these people. I worked with the man for years and I went to high school with the woman. Both were decent people. The man was abusive to animals so I imagine it overflowed to his home life. He did love his biological kids. Both had no real education. People sometimes just don't have plans. They fall into relationships and just stick with it for better or worse. She couldn't make enough money to support her last two kids by this guy so she stuck it out. She didn't pursue any better education and cleaned houses. He had a decent job due to having a Godfather who knew he wasn't a rock star and got him into a job paying very good money. He got really lucky. Today, no way he would get a job like that.

JohnGalt79

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #11 on: March 16, 2018, 08:23:35 PM »
Beekayworld, First of all you don't know these people. I worked with the man for years and I went to high school with the woman. Both were decent people. The man was abusive to animals so I imagine it overflowed to his home life. He did love his biological kids. Both had no real education. People sometimes just don't have plans. They fall into relationships and just stick with it for better or worse. She couldn't make enough money to support her last two kids by this guy so she stuck it out. She didn't pursue any better education and cleaned houses. He had a decent job due to having a Godfather who knew he wasn't a rock star and got him into a job paying very good money. He got really lucky. Today, no way he would get a job like that.

She is a parasite.

driftwood

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #12 on: March 17, 2018, 04:52:26 AM »
This is why I refuse to practice family law. Adults being complete children and screwing each other over at every opportunity doesn’t really count as “badass” in my book.

I agree. It's scary how quickly people get encouraged to screw someone over as soon as a relationship goes south. She stayed with him for 18 years, so if he's a 'horrible man', then I'd say she's probably his peer and is at a similar level of quality.

chrisgermany

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #13 on: March 17, 2018, 10:12:01 AM »
They probably deserved each other, or why did they marry?

lexde

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #14 on: March 17, 2018, 12:52:35 PM »
This is why I refuse to practice family law. Adults being complete children and screwing each other over at every opportunity doesn’t really count as “badass” in my book.

I agree. It's scary how quickly people get encouraged to screw someone over as soon as a relationship goes south. She stayed with him for 18 years, so if he's a 'horrible man', then I'd say she's probably his peer and is at a similar level of quality.
Yep. This is just thoroughly-planned theft. Plain and simple. We are only getting one-half of one side of a story but I just don’t see how this is “badass” at all. Sounds like stealing from someone who she feels has wronged her rather than trying to solve any underlying problem. Kind of makes my skin crawl.

blinx7

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #15 on: March 17, 2018, 01:10:06 PM »
This is why I refuse to practice family law. Adults being complete children and screwing each other over at every opportunity doesn’t really count as “badass” in my book.

I agree. It's scary how quickly people get encouraged to screw someone over as soon as a relationship goes south. She stayed with him for 18 years, so if he's a 'horrible man', then I'd say she's probably his peer and is at a similar level of quality.
Yep. This is just thoroughly-planned theft. Plain and simple. We are only getting one-half of one side of a story but I just don’t see how this is “badass” at all. Sounds like stealing from someone who she feels has wronged her rather than trying to solve any underlying problem. Kind of makes my skin crawl.

Agreed.  What's "badass" about mortgage fraud / theft? 

And why should we trust the side of the story that tries to paint the person committing fraud in a good light?  What basis do we have to conclude that this man was "horrible"?  The fact that a probable sociopath with multiple children from various failed relationships felt so bitter that she engaged in unethical, and probably criminal acts, just to make his life more difficult too?
« Last Edit: March 17, 2018, 01:15:32 PM by blinx7 »

Telecaster

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #16 on: March 17, 2018, 01:46:49 PM »
The most badass divorce plan is the one where you don't get divorced.

MrThatsDifferent

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #17 on: March 17, 2018, 04:11:16 PM »
This isn’t what I would think of when I think of badass, this sounds evil. Badass isn’t evil.

calimom

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #18 on: March 17, 2018, 04:37:37 PM »
She sounds mildly deranged. Yeah, sure the husband committed some real or imagined crimes, but the wife in her own greedy stupidity, seriously compromised her own credit rating and good name. How on earth did she get someone to rent her an apartment?

Not a badass.

kpd905

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #19 on: March 17, 2018, 05:38:42 PM »
The only worse one I've heard was one spouse who fought to have custody of their dog(s), and then put them down as soon as custody was given.

v8rx7guy

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #20 on: March 17, 2018, 07:16:15 PM »
Sounds like they were both ass hats

Holyoak

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #21 on: March 18, 2018, 11:23:36 AM »
She sounds mildly deranged. Yeah, sure the husband committed some real or imagined crimes, but the wife in her own greedy stupidity, seriously compromised her own credit rating and good name. How on earth did she get someone to rent her an apartment?

Not a badass.

I would bet after reading the OP's comments, there is another someone in the picture, and probably has been for a long while...  Considering the situation, monkey branching would fit very well, as would scheming/coaching from the 'other' person to gain things.

Roadrunner53

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #22 on: March 18, 2018, 11:38:32 AM »
I think I posted this story wrong. I posted it as Bad Ass but actually meant it to just be Bad. A bad person who did a bad thing. Not a person who figured out how to do a Bad Ass thing in a positive twist. Sorry to have posted it wrong.

Dicey

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #23 on: March 18, 2018, 02:32:00 PM »
My sister's second husband's first wife (say it slowly) did something along these lines before/during their divorce. Very similar. When my sister married him, she discovered exactly why his ex might have done such a thing.

I think he's on his third wife now...

Adding another layer... When my sister started dating him, she was in the process of buying a house. The ex had the kids show her where it was. She found one for rent just around the corner and moved in. She would open the door and send the kids to my sister's house at dinner time. Worse, still, she would drop them off when my sister wasn't home and take off. The poor kids would sit on the porch with their coloring books, waiting for my sister to get home. Turns out all of the adults, my sister included, deserved each other, but those poor kids! (I am not touch with any of his kids, but I have heard they all survived into adulthood.)

v8rx7guy

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #24 on: March 18, 2018, 09:11:24 PM »
I think I posted this story wrong. I posted it as Bad Ass but actually meant it to just be Bad. A bad person who did a bad thing. Not a person who figured out how to do a Bad Ass thing in a positive twist. Sorry to have posted it wrong.

Kinda reminds me of this funny stand up comic bit:

https://youtu.be/RAGcDi0DRtU

netskyblue

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #25 on: March 19, 2018, 09:19:35 AM »
What the hell is wrong with people?  I've been divorced twice, and both times, it's been a simple matter of print some forms out, fill them in and file them, go through the mandatory waiting period (60 days in Indiana, 90 in Iowa), and a judge looks over the settlement agreement and signs to finalize.  There was a filing and court cost of something like $185, but all in all not bad.

Never EVER get involved with someone you don't trust to handle bad times like a mature adult.  There may be other factors in a relationship that make it end with a "we don't want the same things in life anymore, it's best for us both to move on and pursue our wants and needs on our own," but GEEZ. What kind of a person wants to fuck someone else over like that?

Uturn

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #26 on: March 19, 2018, 12:25:04 PM »
My divorce was easy as well.  On a Wednesday, I withdrew 50% of our bank accounts and transferred the rest to a new account in my name.  That evening I gave her the divorce papers and the 50%.  There was some crying and screaming "you bastard", so I went to a motel.  The following Saturday I went for a ride, when I returned she was gone.  She left me all the camping gear, left my tools alone, and my clothes, and all the food.  I happily sat in my camp chair in an empty house.  Have not seen or heard from her since. 

SubL stache

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Re: Badass divorce plan
« Reply #27 on: March 22, 2018, 03:21:12 PM »
Sounds more like a shitty person than a badass plan.  Not much chance for the children to become decent people being raised by this woman.