Next House Advice - Help

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[HawkeyeNFO]

Forever home is a fantasy, considering most people move around and don't stay in a house for 30 years. 

Option 2 sounds best to me, if you can find a 3 or 4 BR home.  With a baby in the house, you won't want to move immediately, and if you're crowded already, you know it's not going to work unless you do move.  Get the move done, then the baby and family will have a nice place with adequate space. 

[ShoulderThingThatGoesUp]

Try an epic Goodwill run first, to see if you can feel less cramped.

[FINate]

Stick it out as long as possible in your current house. I know 4-person families (parents + 2 kids) that make it work in small 2/1 houses no problem.

Bigger house == higher mortgage payment, higher insurance, more expensive to heat...higher expenses all around. Plus, you will have a bunch of new space to fill, more spent shopping.

Purge the clutter. Make better use of the space (closet organizers, shelving, rearranging and such). If you have any yard at all, add a storage shed. If you have a garage/carriage house, use that for your gym and/or storage.

You shouldn't need an entire bedroom for the kitty litter area.

It will cost you literally thousands of dollars/year (plus hefty realtor fees) to "trade up" in housing. Don't do it unless you absolutely must (and IMO family of 2 or even 3 should be no problem in a 2/1). Spend a small amount now to make it work. Even paying for a gym membership is preferable to trading up to a bigger house just to have a home gym.

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[FINate]

Staying put temporarily is definitely on the table but won’t be super comfortable. I’m really not being a complainy pants when I say cramped. We don’t have a dishwasher and have no room for one and Im fine with that. When I say cramped, it isn’t that there is too much stuff in closets or we need to organize... The bedrooms are small - we have an 85 lb german shepard whose 4 ft crate will have to be moved from our bedroom to make room for a crib. There is room for the crate in the sunporch but it gets very hot in the summer. We could move the home gym and my desk/book shelf to storage (in parents basement). I mentioned the kitty litter because I assumed it cant stay in the babys room, or ours if the baby will be sleeping there. There is no room in the bathroom so that leaves the hallway. The main rooms of the house are where the dog lives, so the cat cant go there because the dog will eat him... To further complicate things, whenever I mention that the home gym is the sticking point to making this place work, my husband freaks out about how I act like this is only my house and he has a right to have his things here too (because you know.. our bed, dining room table, couch, bathtub etc are “my” things, and the home gym is “his” things which should have equal rights in the house (insert eye roll). To be fair, the dog which is item 2 on the list of “how not to make a small house work” is also his.

My parents eventually built a home after buying/selling 2 prior homes and feel they would have been better off financially if they built from the beginning. This was the 80s though and they built a home for less than one year’s salary for a coal miner and a stay at home mom. It would take 3.5 times our family income to build something similar.

Yikes, you didn't mention the 85# dog that doesn't get along with the cat. Whatever the housing situation, that sounds like a recipe for chaos, esp. with a baby. Agree with you that the mental partitioning of his stuff (his nonessentials) vs. your stuff (essential household items) is eye roll worthy. This seems like a deeper issue you need to address, otherwise it's only going to get worse in a new house (man cave, expensive toys) and with babies (is he going to assume that the baby/kid stuff is also yours?).

My recommendation: Make a reasonable comprehensive estimate of the cost difference between the three options. If you can potentially make it work in your current situation for 7 years (or whatever the number), then multiple the cost difference by 7. So, hypothetically, if it would cost $10k more per year (plus one-time $20k in realtor fees) to trade up to option two, then the cost of doing so is $90k. Whatever the actual numbers end up being, at least you're going into it with a realistic understanding of the tradeoffs involved (e.g. is it important enough to trade up that you're willing to pay an extra $90k for it).

[waltworks]

Did I miss how much money you have saved for DP/investing? Because you seem like you're pretty darn financially stressed to pull this off at all, even if you stay in your house. If you're sitting on a pile of investments and savings, different story.

As I see it:
-Current income ~$40k (?) or $3400/mo. I assume this is after taxes.
-Current expenses $1271/mo with nothing for home maintenance, car maintenance/licensing/registrations, internet/phone services, emergencies, etc, etc. It doesn't look like you actually know what you're spending all that well, since you only used a few categories and round numbers. It would be a good idea to track your spending and see what all of it really adds up to.

So if we're being really optimistic, you have $1500/mo of wiggle room. A mortgage on any of the houses you're proposing will eat most of that (or all) immediately, and you'll be losing a significant amount of your income at the same time? Sounds like a recipe for disaster to me - unless, as I said, you're sitting on a huge pile of money you can use to buy the house.

So, erm, option 1.

-W

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[FINate]

Is dp down payment? If I sell current house for $80k (assumed worst case scenario) I could pay off car loan ($16k), loc ($14k), and balance on mortgage ($23k) which would leave me with $27k which is obviously leas than 20% down. Realistically if I assume this won’t happen until August, I would have an additional $10k for $37k down which is putting me in a more comfortable position to have a 20% down payment. If im close, I needn’t pay off the entire LOC if it would mean avoiding cmhc insurance.

Buying a new house, assuming $180k with $40k down would actually free up more cash flow as I would be paying mortgage and taxes of $480 biweekly rather than my current mortgage ($350) and car payment ($300) which total $650 biweekly. My investments are currently limited to company pension and rrsps. I wiped out my tfsa by taking 2 years off work to do a masters degree in another city, and our recent wedding this summer. Im not usually so financially stretched but for the inconvenient timing of grad school, wedding, and baby so close together. We could put it off but the increased risk to the baby with advanced maternal age, and the increased risk/ cost of fertility issues if we wait too long horrifies me more than being broke for a year.

In terms of expenses, Ive tracked all of my expenses for the past 3 years using ynab. I’ve rounded numbers as I thought it irrelevent that I spent precisely $92.31 biweekly on oil for the previous year and figured that I would make it easier on everyone and call it $100. My husband pays the internet bill, not me.

OMG, just no. You are not doing advanced accounting for a Fortune 500. You really need to build net worth yet bizarrely you're worrying about cash flow? Buying a more expensive house is going to make you less well off, no two ways about it. You need to pay off your debts rather than shuffling them around, and the quickest way to do this is to live in the cheapest, smallest house (the one you have). Your financial situation is extremely precarious. Do you really want to stand on the financial precipice to get a bigger house, and then bring a baby into that situation? Hey, here's an infant, more than a full time job, now go get a second job to make ends meet, or your husband takes another job meaning you don't have anyone to help at home. Also, have you thought about what happens if you trade up to a bigger house and the economy takes a dive? I can't tell you how many people I know who had this happen to them just a few years ago. Now add a baby to the mix and you could be looking at serious hardship down the road. Maybe you'd like to move the whole family in with your parents, that's always fun for a few years.

You can totally have a baby in your current house. Have your parents or a friend take the dog and cat. Problem solved. Tell your husband to grow up and be an adult, to figure out some other solution for the home gym. Voila! You now have a perfectly functional second bedroom for the baby and are no longer whistling past the graveyard on your way to financial ruin.

The other alternative is to keep reaching to "have it all," to refuse to make any trade-offs. Everything is non negotiable, the pets, home gym, big house, consolidating debts into mortgages, freeing up cash flow (instead of building net worth)...the outcome is entirely predictable.

It's your life, your choice, but don't expect a lot of enthusiasm from people here on the latter option.

[Fishindude]

Stick it out where you are at, clean up the LOC and auto loans, etc. before doing anything major.   Sell the home gym stuff and buy YMCA membership.   Cat could go to if you're not too attached.   If you like where you live and it's feasible, consider adding on to your home or renovating to get what you need.   Bedrooms are pretty cheap square footage, kitchens and bathrooms get expensive.

[waltworks]

Is dp down payment? If I sell current house for $80k (assumed worst case scenario) I could pay off car loan ($16k), loc ($14k), and balance on mortgage ($23k) which would leave me with $27k which is obviously leas than 20% down. Realistically if I assume this won’t happen until August, I would have an additional $10k for $37k down which is putting me in a more comfortable position to have a 20% down payment. If im close, I needn’t pay off the entire LOC if it would mean avoiding cmhc insurance.

Ok, look - this whole thing is a mess. Expenses are biweekly - so you have ~$1300 in biweekly expenses and $1700 in biweekly income?!? It sounds like you're practically going backwards... maybe I'm not understanding something.

Why are your husband's income numbers not included here? What is his income?

Also, you didn't answer the question - what assets do you have (stocks, bonds, cash, whatever)? Because if you have no other assets, buying a bigger house is straight up financial suicide. If you have a bunch of savings, it's not suicide, but it's still a stupid idea unless those are some HUGE savings.

-W

[FINate]

Is dp down payment? If I sell current house for $80k (assumed worst case scenario) I could pay off car loan ($16k), loc ($14k), and balance on mortgage ($23k) which would leave me with $27k which is obviously leas than 20% down. Realistically if I assume this won’t happen until August, I would have an additional $10k for $37k down which is putting me in a more comfortable position to have a 20% down payment. If im close, I needn’t pay off the entire LOC if it would mean avoiding cmhc insurance.

Ok, look - this whole thing is a mess. Expenses are biweekly - so you have ~$2500 in biweekly expenses and $1700 in biweekly income?!? It sounds like you're going backwards... maybe I'm not understanding something.

Why are your husband's income numbers not included here? What is his income?

Also, you didn't answer the question - what assets do you have (stocks, bonds, cash, whatever)? Because if you have no other assets, buying a bigger house is straight up financial suicide. If you have a bunch of savings, it's not suicide, but it's still a stupid idea unless those are some HUGE savings.

-W

I may be assuming too much, but with $16k car loan and $14k LOC I figured savings/investments are ~$0.

[waltworks]

I may be assuming too much, but with $16k car loan and $14k LOC I figured savings/investments are ~$0.

That was my assumption as well, but OP hasn't actually addressed it, so who knows.

Why on earth would anyone even consider buying a house when their net worth is ~$50k and they have zero savings/are living paycheck to paycheck?

Sigh.

-W

[FINate]

I may be assuming too much, but with $16k car loan and $14k LOC I figured savings/investments are ~$0.

That was my assumption as well, but OP hasn't actually addressed it, so who knows.

Why on earth would anyone even consider buying a house when their net worth is ~$50k and they have zero savings/are living paycheck to paycheck?

Sigh.

-W

Yeah, I don't get it.

[zinnie]

Reading through your numbers, I do not understand how you can afford a bigger house. And especially now, when you are trying to add a baby to the picture. It sounds like you are already overwhelmed, so why make it worse? If it were me, I'd focus on these things:

a) Declutter--you can absolutely fit two people and a baby comfortably into a 2/1. It sounds like the stuff and the pets are the real problem. If the pets can't get along, consider re-homing one of them. How are you going to handle warring pets with a small child running around? As for the stuff, you could pull a Marie Kondo and go through everything with your husband asking the question "do I love this? does it make me feel joy" and if not, off to Goodwill it goes. You'll have to work out a way so that you both get to keep the things that you love most and also still have a table to eat at.

b) Work on increasing your income. And can your husband work? It sounds like he is bringing in something, but if what you really want is a house that is currently out of your budget, can he help? Especially while you are on maternity leave, it sounds like you'll need help to reduce the financial strain.

c) Once a healthy baby is born and is large enough to justifiably need more space, or a second new human comes into the world, re-evaluate finances and see whether your option 2 or 3 fit well within your budget. If so, you have my blessing. If not, repeat a and b above until you can make one of them work.

You can survive in your current house for now. In your financial situation I'd really wait on upgrading the house. We have a 850sq. ft. 2/1 and have plenty of neighbors near us with one or two young children living in the same size house. In a lot of places it is a luxury to even have a single family home and people do just fine.

[FINate]

I'm undecided between buying a second home that will be a 5-7 year home (until we have children and they start school) or stretching our finances a bit and buying a "forever" home. I'm 30 years old and recently married. I bought and renovated our current home 4 years ago while I was single. It is an 80 year old 2 bedroom/1 bathroom bungalow that has been completely renovated. It is worth between $80-90k and I owe $23,000 on it at 2.99% interest. I also have a car loan at 2.9% (remaining payments including interest are $16,000 and I have 2 years left) and owe $14,000 on a LOC at 5% interest (home renovations, and wedding expenses).

We are already a bit cramped in our current home, and hope to have children in the very near future. As I'm our family’s primary income earner, we will have a very rough year financially during a year of maternity leave. My employer tops up to 80% of my income for the first 4 months, but for the remainder of the year my biweekly income will be approximately $875 after taxes (Canadian EI). Typically it is around $1700.

The three options that I see are:
1.   Try to suck it up and stay in current home until after maternity leave year. This will be fairly cramped as the spare bedroom currently acts as a home gym/ office/ kitty litter room and would have to be made into a baby's room. It will allow us to pay more of the current house/ car off so we have more money to put down on the next house.
2.   Buy a 5-7 year home such as a larger bungalow with finished basement. This would probably be in the $160-180k range. I would use the money from selling our current house to pay off the car with Option 2 or 3 to afford the higher house payments.
3.   Stretch our finances and get a “forever” home. This would involve 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, living room, den, separate dining room and would likely be in the $240-$250k range. Ideally my dream home would involve building a new home but that would be north of $300k.

My current biweekly expenses are:
Mortgage and property tax: $355
Car Payment: $300 
Heat: $100 (cold area of Canada, oil heat)
Food: $100
Car Insurance: $45
House Insurance: $31
Pets: $40
Gas: $100
Restaurants: $100
Entertainment: $100
(During the maternity leave year, gas would be cut in half, and restaurants and entertainment could go away.) Ignore my husband’s income as far as the home purchase analysis goes, with the exception that he takes care of internet, electricity, half our food cost, and water. He is currently a supply teacher and it can take up to 10 years in our area to get full time work. When he does, we will be in much better shape financially but I don’t want to rely on that at this point.

Now to pick on something different: You appear to be living paycheck to paycheck, perhaps even going backwards into increasing debt (your expenses appear to be larger than your income). But you're spending $240/month on nonessentials such as pets, restaurants, and entertainment. That's almost $3k/year. That should all be $0 at least until you get your financial house in order, and even then, it should be very low until you build real wealth.

[former player]

Current net income $44k a year.  Income during a year of maternity leave: approx $27k.    ($11k in maternity pay (80% of $1700 x 8) + $15.75k in state maternity pay ($875 x 18))

Current net expenses $33k a year.  Do the net expenses as listed include repayments on the LOC?

Expenses during a year of maternity leave: current expenses less $3,000 for half gas and all restaurants and entertainment = $30k a year.  So your debts increase by at least $3k over the year of maternity leave, not including costs of baby.  Children plural: debts increase by a further $3k plus child costs for each further year of maternity leave.

I think you will be struggling to afford a full year of maternity leave even in your current house.  You are suggesting reducing your outgoings by paying off your car loan and LOC with equity from the new house.  Effectively what you doing with this idea is increasing your cash flow by moving your 2 year car loan and your whatever years LOC to a 25 year mortgage.  If this were a good idea you could do it with equity from the current house at less cost, yes?  That would make your maternity leave year more affordable.

As to needing a bigger house, the current health advice seems to be that a baby should sleep in the same room as its mother for the first 6 months, which puts you about a year and a half at the soonest from needing to put your existing second bedroom to work as baby's bedroom.

The reason houses built 80 years ago worked for their occupants was that people had a lot less stuff in those days, so didn't need big closets or room for big sofas. They certainly couldn't afford extra rooms as offices/home gyms.  If you commit to a more minimalist lifestyle (good for the planet) and limit your possessions to what fits comfortably in the space you have you could stay where you are until baby 2 needs their own bedroom in 3 or more years' time.

[waltworks]

Slightly OT here, but if your husband can't get full time work in his field for 10 years, potentially... he needs to just go get a job doing something else. NOW. Especially if you guys want kids. Time to be a grownup and realize that you screwed up with your choice of education/career, and go get an entry level job at the bank (or whatever) so you can help support the family.

-W

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[robartsd]

Staying put temporarily is definitely on the table but won’t be super comfortable.

For the maternity leave, could you move the dining room table into your parents' basement and move the office/weights into your dining space? Or turn your sun porch into your dining area for the summer?  Since you're looking for temporary solutions, think outside of the box with what you can live without.

Since your husband doesn't have full-time work, the added stress of a much higher mortgage (and taxes and insurance and utilities) sounds awful. I vote for option 1.

Other things to explore with staying put:
Can the sun porch be modified to be better ventilated in the summer?
Does your backyard/zoning allow you to build a shed that could serve for the excercise room/office?

I'm guessing the incompatible pets were brought together with your marriage - this seems to be the hardest problem for you to solve. I'm sure you are both attached to your pets, and even if you weren't re-homing pets can be difficult.

Currently most income is from you, but what options are there for expanding husband's income so that upgrading your housing would be more manageable?

[FINate]

Is everyone on this board always so mean? Currently my biweekly expenses are approximately $400 less than income. How is that living pay check to pay check, or as someone else posted that my expenses are more than my income?

If you consider people saying it like it is "mean" then, yes, Mustachians are pretty blunt about such things. People around here usually aim for 50-80% savings rate...so saving $800/month is relatively low, and will be lower after baby. It is pretty much paycheck to paycheck relatively speaking.

I have an employer pension (worth approximately $30k currently) and $27,000 in an RRSP (i.e. it stays there). One of the reasons my expenses are so close to my income is that my current mortgage is currently on track to be paid off in just over 6 years (total, not 6 additional years). 

So why not stay put and get to zero debt sooner rather than later?

If we add on to the house, we won't get that money back when we sell. That would be fine if the cost of doing that is less than what we would be "throwing away" in increased interest and taxes on a larger place, but it wouldn't be.

But what if you could stay put w/o adding on. You'd be way better off financially doing this

I'm not going to get rid of our cat. That's like suggesting someone sell their kid so they would save money on food, which sounds like something some people on this board might actually do.   

No one on this board would propose selling their kid, sheesh! But plenty of people decide to skip having kids or have fewer than they might otherwise want, because that's the financially responsible thing. It's called being an adult, and making trade-offs. If the cat is non negotiable then at least the dog? I like cats and dogs, had them growing up. But chose not to have pets because of the expense involved, and taking care of kids is enough work.

My goal here isn't to retire early, but to minimize expenses. I love my job and will probably be happily working into my 70s. 

And we've offered great advice on minimizing expenses. Sounds like you've already made up your mind that your option (1) isn't actually an option, which is actually your most minimal expense. I think that's a mistake, and I will not tell you what you want to hear even if you think that makes me mean.

[zinnie]

Was I mean? I certainly didn't intend to be.

You do have to realize that most of us are giving advice from a perspective of trying to get expenses down as low as possible, invest as much as possible, reduce environmental impact, and be financially independent early. That doesn't have to be your goal but it is certainly the perspective of many on the forum.

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[ShoulderThingThatGoesUp]

Can your husband get a night-time job to provide regular income? And what does he do all day anyways if he's not working enough to have non-negligible income?

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[FINate]

What I found mean was suggestions that I rounded my budget numbers so I must not have any idea what I actually spend, I didn't mention retirement accounts so I must not have any (I didn't mention them because they aren't available for use), and that I live pay check to pay check and spend more than I make each month (I don't). I did spend more than I made last year due to major renovations to our house (hence LOC). We also spent $30k on a wedding (obviously not one of my finest decisions) but it's paid for except $4k of the LOC.

$4k or $14k LOC? And waltworks was asking specifically about savings/investments (not retirement accounts), which you still haven't answered. How much do you have saved/invested outside of retirement accounts?

As for the paycheck to paycheck thing, I think people are reading into missing information about savings/investments and the following quote:

As I'm our family’s primary income earner, we will have a very rough year financially during a year of maternity leave.

...and then questioning the wisdom of taking on yet more debt for a bigger house.

And then there's this quote from another thread:

I'd be inclined to leave it as it is, unless the formal living room is incredibly small, or dark, and opening it up would make the interior prettier to potential buyers. A separate den and formal living room are one of the main things I'm looking for in a home (along with formal dining room). I'm not sure about your area, but at least where I live, no one has enough children to warrant 5 bedrooms. Even 4 bedrooms is plenty. If the target market is young families, a random bedroom on the main floor would seem weird and misplaced. If the target market is multi-generational families with lots of children than it would work.

So I'm left confused. Is your financial future in question ("very rough year" and trying to increase cash flow), or are you saving a lot and are very strong financially? Is your priority really to minimize expenses, or are you really looking for a den and formal dining room? Because in my mind a den and formal dining room is about as low a priority I can think of as compared to just having a workable living situation.

[ShoulderThingThatGoesUp]

Can the two of you do some math on this dues-paying time your husband is in? Ten years is a long time to work nearly full-time and not earn much in order to eventually get a decent salary. Are thee other careers he's qualified for? This has to be frustrating for him.

[zinnie]

Now hearing the additional information about the neighborhood it seems like staying is an even better option. At least, you know, from a stranger on the internet who has only read a few short posts you have written :)

Maybe consider that you don't have to decide right now, or soon. Let it marinate a while. Make sure you've investigated every option with your current house (and actually gotten some bids from contractors--in my experience they think of options you wouldn't have.) You have a lot of budget leeway between your current home value and what you said you would pay for your 5-7 year home (~100k). And you could wait a while and save a while before you do any renovations.

Anyway, good luck!

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[Apple_Tango]

You can have anything you want, but you can’t have everything. I think you need to make your dream list of everything you want. Child, student loans paid off,  home office, home gym, 3 bedrooms, full time job for husband, a cat and a dog, totally debt free, lots of savings/cash in the bank...literally list everything you want in your dream, perfect life. And then prioritize and put some stuff at the bottom of the list. Does your husband want the home gym more than a child’s bedroom? Does he want the full time job that y’all will have to move out of town for? Can you sell the dining room table and just eat in the sun room? Do you want to convert the basement? You both are going to need a clear vision and the wilingness to compromise. It can’t be just getting rid of “his” or “your” things.

I think you need to get creative with some solutions. And spend your money (or save) in a way that is most in line with your top priorities. Some people will claim that saving for a down payment is their number one priority, but when you look at their budget it is clear that in reality eating take out and going to the movies are number one because that’s where their disposable income is going. Not saying this is true for you, just giving an example. Although $400 in restaurants and entertainment per month seems high to me.

[waltworks]

What do you have in savings? Not retirement accounts, not pension contributions, SAVINGS YOU CAN USE RIGHT NOW.

If it's zero, then I call BS on your budget numbers. According to you you should have $400 to save every 2 weeks. That's $10k a year. Where is it going?

The husband needs to get a real job ASAP. Sorry, part time subbing for negligible pay, in the hopes of a job in 10 years (when he's presumably ~40 years old?!?) Forget it. Go. Get. A. Job. Paying for gas and internet and his loans might cut it for a college boyfriend sharing a room with you. It is unacceptable for a partner who wants to have children with you. Period.

-W

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[waltworks]

Ok, so the answer is: you have zero in savings. Yes?

-W

[FINate]

No savings other than in retirement accounts. Over the last 5 years I spent approximately $35k in renovations on this house (rewiring, insulation, all new windows, roof, furnace, electric water heater, complete kitchen and bath tear-out, paint, refinish hardwood floors everywhere but kitchen/bath). I bought furniture and window coverings because this is my first house (not all new). I took 2 years off work to do a masters program that was split between this city and another. We had a $30k wedding in July. Home renovations are done, grad school is done, we will not be having another wedding. That is why those items do not show up in the budget.

Curious how those one time expenses just happen to consume all past discretionary income. You have zero savings, no emergency fund. Net worth is very low. You're planning on having kids. Your husband only works PT. This is not a good jumping off point for buying a bigger house.

Wait a few years. Demonstrate to yourself that you can save/invest the $800/month and that more one time expenses don't pop up. Pay off the car loan and LOC. Quite honestly, I would wait until your husband finds FT work (either teaching or something else) before considering taking on more house.

[KBecks]

I think you need to take your I and make it into a we, and work with your husband on the planning.  It sounds like you are making the plans and decisions here.  You and he need to talk about if this house can work for you.  You also need to talk about the future kids.  Can you take a year maternity leave and still have a job?  Are you sure? 

Stay in the house you have, do not renovate. De-clutter and make the most of what you have. 

[Apple_Tango]

Is everyone on this board always so mean? Currently my biweekly expenses are approximately $400 less than income. How is that living pay check to pay check, or as someone else posted that my expenses are more than my income?

Well, what are you doing with that $400 biweekly? ($800 per month, right?) Paying off debt? Saving? If I were you I would be getting a little emergency fund together, and then throwing the rest at all the debt except the mortgage, where I would keep making the minimums. Also husband needs a full time job. Those things  will free you up for cash flow that you are concerned about, and then you can use that money to reach your next priorities, whatever they turn out to be. I would not buy a new home until your numbers look better...maybe targeting around the time baby turns into toddler. Which gives you at least 2 years in your current if you got pregnant tomorrow. More likely 3-4 years because if you’re just putting 800 per month towards your debt, it’s going to take a while to get that solved.

[Megma]

OP, I get it you want a baby. You want a bigger house. You’re thirty and feel like you are ready for these things. But you just got married, take half a minute to breathe. You want a baby now but if you wait one year it’s not the end of the world. One year, you can save a lot of money.

I would try to stay in your current house another 2-3 years. If you wait a year to have a baby, then get preganant, have the baby and then look to move during your maternity leave that would be about 3 years. The young infant can basically be in your room anyway.

 In the meantime, while waiting to have a baby, pay off your debt and save your down payment up.

We’re doing the same thing now actually. We’ve been in our smallish house for 4 years (plan for it to be a rental later) and so want to move but the reality is we can’t yet, we need to save more. I mean we could get loan and do it but it’s not a good idea. It’s annoying but we both know the longer we stay here, the better it will be financially. Sigh.

[coopdog]

If you have to ask on this forum, then I think deep down you know your answer.

Here's my opinion anyway- One major life event at a time. You just got married. Stay in the house you are in. Save money. Save money. Save money. A bigger house won't feel like a blessing when your living on the edge financially and away from friends and family. Be elated if you are blessed with a child and enjoy him or her without the extra financial stress.

One last thing- my workout equipment lived in the same place for 14 years in the same place MMM keeps his... in the yard. Presto! instant bedroom.   

[Dicey]

Megma and coopdog nailed it. Also, Walt's words are stern, but correct.

We are blunt here. If you didn't know that when you opened your account, you did it too soon, which seems to be a major theme in your life.

Here is my blunt (and priceless) advice:

Slow the fuck down!