Thank you all for your advice!
First the HOA is pretty low, the properties I've been considering only ~80-125. There are also some duplexes in another area I've looked at that are priced from 60-80 but I was concerned about the quality of tenant there, thought I would do better with a Townhouse. Rents for SFH aren't high enough in this area (most still have HOAs here too, though lower fees) because the prices are so much higher, double a townhouse at least.
I did not anticipate that I would need 20-25% for a down payment on an investment property. My experience with banks when buying the 2 different house I've purchased to occupy has been that they couldn't give me enough money! Every bank has pre-approved me for more than I asked for "just in case," sometimes 75k more than I asked for, but I always stuck to my budget of course. I was thinking to talk to the agent I used for my home loan in a few months to see what they would approve me for.
Regarding my expenses, they're about 2k/month (with the rental offset 1,400, but I'm saving all of the 600/month and usually more), so I'm close to 6 months of expenses and will be over that by the time I would buy something.
I like the worst case scenario thinking - if I would lose my job, I could probably find another one but likely for at least slightly less pay. I could get a new roommate in heartbeat, I'm in an area with two large universities within 15 minutes drive both with sizable graduate schools including medical, law - this is one reason rentals are appealing here, the pool is huge and it keeps prices up. If my BF would also move out, my expenses would increase probably 400/mo max because I would start paying the utilities for the house.
Regarding the questions around my savings in 401K/IRA, I'm currently saving 5% in the 401K and getting a 10% match, the highest my employer offers. My IRA is mostly rollover from previous jobs, I contribute to it sporadically because I don't like the restrictions on taking it out. My "20k liquid" is actually currently on loan to my mother for her established business to expand, she is paying me interest (still a bad idea, I know but we do stupid things for family).