Get yourself a plan, take a concrete pill and harden the *uck up.
A life is a terrible thing to waste. don't do it.
Unplug the internet and go do something!
I do this and it works
We've had a spate of suicides in my town lately--3 guys I knew, in their early 40s, offed themselves in the space of two months. They've also had to have interventions at high schools in Canada 'cause so many kids were killing themselves. Stats are way, way up. Social media, culture change, Internet to blame? My friend actually thinks there's a virus causing this level of depression. There are millions of viruses out there that don't do anything to any noticeable things to us physically.
I get dark. The darkness happens. (Especially in winter.) But I've learned to *become* the dark, embrace the hell out of it. Would Darth Vader, Batman, or Skeletor sit there crying in the corner and feeling conflicted and sorry for himself? No way, he'd figure out who's ass he was gonna shove the light saber up next.
Tan, take vitamins, workout! Listen to Tony Robbins tapes (seriously--you just need the first one). Do go see a psychiatrist if that doesn't help.
That said, when/where I grew up in the 80s, a guy was fully allowed to do something called "wigging out". He'd buy a carton of smokes, lock himself in his room for two weeks, and do nothing but sleep, watch TV, and be a depressed slob eating brown beans right outta the can in stained underwear. It was common knowledge as normal.
"Where's John this week? I haven't seen him." "Oh, he's wigging out so won't be around." "Oh, okay."
Did it myself at least 3 or 4 times between 19 and 24. Now people think there's something super wrong with you, get concerned, and people believe there's something wrong with themselves if they wig. We live in a Care Bear society where everybody has to be happy all the time or there's something wrong. Fuck that, being Prozac happy and on your game all the time isn't normal.