Having "the talk" with your boss (and others)

[G-dog]

So, how did you announce your retirement/FIRE at work to your boss and/or colleagues?

This is freaking me out - I don't want to burn any bridges (vs. I want to arrange a flash mob dance routine to 'take this job and shove it!').

I don't want to lie, but and also don't feel any need to be completely forthcoming. I am not leaving for another job with a direct competitor, so they don't need to know anything else.

Because I can 'retire', i cannot give just 2 weeks notice (will have to give at least a month).

I am dreading the interrogation from colleagues. - though a few already know of my plan.

So if this was difficult for you - how did you handle it/ any advice?

[Financial.Velociraptor]

Boss and I were in conference in his office and he was telling me about a project that was going to be mine.  I was going to give 2 weeks notice the coming Monday but decided it wasn't fair to let him pencil me in on a project I wouldn't be starting so I told him I was giving him two weeks notice.  It was a little awkward and he wanted to know what was wrong.  I told him the truth.  Nothing was particularly wrong, it was that nothing was particularly "right" and since I didn't find work emotional fulfilling and I could afford to live off investments, that is what I was going to do.

So they got 2.5 weeks notice.  And I had to discuss my plan with increasingly higher levels of management roughly daily and convince yet another person that I wasn't in any way disgruntled.  I was just retired.  At 40.  [Don't look at me like that; I'm not bullshitting you.]  Most coworkers didn't know until about an hour before I left when I sent an email to those I wanted to stay in contact with.

Then they collected my things and escorted me out of the building because after seven years on the insider roster, I couldn't be trusted not to steal a coffee maker on the way out or something like that.

[Frankies Girl]

Doing this on Monday. (eeeeeeeeeekkkk!)

I originally thought about just going in and informally discussing my resignation, but I have a proposal for a longer notice period to facilitate handing off a large and complicated monthly project (in exchange for some considerations) and I got myself all tongue-twistery when I was practicing what I wanted to say and realized I'm sure to get flustered and maybe say something stupid. I don't have a strong relationship with my boss, so I would rather make it more formal and lay everything out succinctly so as to avoid any awkwardness or misunderstandings.

So I just sat down and wrote out a resignation letter.

There is lots of "grateful for the experience and it was a pleasure working here" stuff as I feel it silly to burn bridges even if I never see that place again. It says nothing about why I'm leaving (retiring early/burnt out/need to concentrate on family)  - my standard short and sweet response is going to be "It's been great, but I just think it's time to move on and try something new."

I'll ask to meet with the main boss, hand over the letter to discuss, and have a copy to go to my team as well (and will meet with them directly after, so they are also aware of what I'm proposing) and then ask for a decision within a day or so on whether they'll go for my longer notice proposal, or don't want to meet my requests and therefore default to the standard two week notice. 

[jordanread]

I'm just going to leave this bit here. Mostly because I want to see what my thoughts are now, versus what they will be in ~4 years when I do catch FIRE. Coming from a place of 'Fuck You' is super powerful, and I am there now, but it'll be interesting to see how that changes as the years go by.

[AlwaysBeenASaver]

I'm nervous about this too...haven't quite figured it out yet. I've considered

enjoyed working here, time for me to move on, but I'm taking a long break first
taking a few years off from working
taking the summer off before evaluating what I want to do next

We had a person quit recently and he refused to say why or what he was doing next...made me wonder if he was FIREing.

[Ozstache]

I eased my boss into the idea of me leaving over a couple of months worth of fireside chats in his office and when traveling together on work trips. He was not at all surprised when I walked in to his office and handed him my notice paperwork for him to sign.

[kathrynd]

I was just a lowly factory worker, with a combined time of 20 years working there, since I was 17.
Lots of people with 40+ years working there.

It was common knowledge that my supervisors knew I was retiring soon.
I gave them 2 week  written notice.
My last week I worked 4pm-12 midnight.

All my co-workers kept saying, I'd be gone by now (Friday night @ 11:45)
So I went into my supervisors office, handed in my tools, employee swipe card, thanked him for being an easy supervisor to work for,shook his hand and went home.

At age 50, I retired (4.5 years ago)


My advice,
when possible, talk about your plans to retire early, so it isn't a shock
Give them plenty of notice,if your job position will take time to replace
Say thank you when you leave.

[StetsTerhune]

When we ER, we're going to hedge our bets a bit by framing it as "A 1-2 year career break." That is because while we assume that ER will be a permanent choice, we don't know, and we want to leave the door cracked open for future job offers.

At least for a while.

I'm definitely planning on hedging my bet when I quit my job. I do some consulting work on the side, so when I quit I'm just going to tell them that I'm leaving to focus on that. Which I will, I just won't mention that I'll still only focus on it 4-5 hours per week. I'm young enough and the world uncertain enough that it's worth a lot to me to leave in a way that will make my current company likely to hire me in the future if need be.

[mak1277]

I don't understand the reluctance to tell people the truth in these situations...it would never occur to me to be anything but totally straightforward with my employers about why I was leaving.  I fully intend to tell my employers that I'm retiring when I give my FIRE notice. 

Am I missing something that I should be thinking about? 

[JohnGalt]

While I didn't quit my last job to go into retirement - I did quit it after hitting my "stage 1" FI level where I have investments that can cover a bare minimum expense level.  My original plan was to quit to freelance part time.  Instead a different full-time opportunity came up that is low stress, pays well, helps build contacts for future freelancing and let's me travel on someone else's dime.  I had a really good relationship with the last boss so I was up front with him about everything, including my future plans.  I basically have an open offer to return to my old position in either a full or part time capacity anytime I want it. With the new job, I'd known my new boss for many years before taking the job and plan on being just as open and up front with him too.

Part of that is probably me working for small companies (at my last job my boss was one of the owners) - but really, once you have that ability to walk away from a job worry free, why bother lying?  I don't see why it would burn a bridge or cause any issues. 

[Cpa Cat]

So I did this earlier in the year. It wasn't great timing for the firm, but they had made certain changes that made me loathe to hang in there longer.

I decided to give a little over three weeks notice, as a courtesy - which I regret. I wish I had given them only two weeks. My boss asked me not to tell anyone right away so that she could prepare a few people. But gossip traveled quickly and rumors flew. By the time I made an official announcement, everyone already knew.

I was asked to work 60 hour weeks until I left (no paid overtime).

My direct manager stopped speaking to me. Not a word for three weeks. He wouldn't even say hello in the hall.

Instead of attempting to secure an appropriate replacement, they reassigned all of my work to two of my overburdened coworkers.

I definitely did not need to throw in an extra week of awkwardness.

[Gone Fishing]

I don't understand the reluctance to tell people the truth in these situations...it would never occur to me to be anything but totally straightforward with my employers about why I was leaving.  I fully intend to tell my employers that I'm retiring when I give my FIRE notice. 

Am I missing something that I should be thinking about?

Even if you are not ER'ing, many mangers feel offended when someone resigns.  Bring ER into the picture and jealousy becomes a real issue as well.  The whole idea of "softening the blow" is to keep the door open in the event you ever need employment again.

[mak1277]

I don't understand the reluctance to tell people the truth in these situations...it would never occur to me to be anything but totally straightforward with my employers about why I was leaving.  I fully intend to tell my employers that I'm retiring when I give my FIRE notice. 

Am I missing something that I should be thinking about?

Even if you are not ER'ing, many mangers feel offended when someone resigns.  Bring ER into the picture and jealousy becomes a real issue as well.  The whole idea of "softening the blow" is to keep the door open in the event you ever need employment again.

Meh, I think this is pretty overblown.  As a manager, I'd much rather have someone be straightforward with me than dance around questions I'm asking about future plans.  If my boss isn't grown-up enough to handle having an employee leave it's not my problem to soften the blow.  As for future employment, I'm happy relying on my skills to earn myself a job.

[Gone Fishing]

So I did this earlier in the year. It wasn't great timing for the firm, but they had made certain changes that made me loathe to hang in there longer.

I decided to give a little over three weeks notice, as a courtesy - which I regret. I wish I had given them only two weeks. My boss asked me not to tell anyone right away so that she could prepare a few people. But gossip traveled quickly and rumors flew. By the time I made an official announcement, everyone already knew.

I was asked to work 60 hour weeks until I left (no paid overtime).

My direct manager stopped speaking to me. Not a word for three weeks. He wouldn't even say hello in the hall.

Instead of attempting to secure an appropriate replacement, they reassigned all of my work to two of my overburdened coworkers.

I definitely did not need to throw in an extra week of awkwardness.

How did I miss this! Was there a thread?

At any rate, congratulations!

Sorry things didn't go well.  Never feels good to leave on a sour note.  Our policy asks for 30 days notice.  I am planning on giving it in order to preserve relations if possible, but I do anticipate a little animosity.  Not as bad as yours, but several years ago we had a restructure that changed who I reported to, my then manager was pretty agressive about milking as much as he could out of me in the 60 day notice they gave us.  Well fast forward a bit and yet another restructure, and I am working for the same manager once again.  The good news is that he is 64 and I am hoping he might anounce his own retirement pretty soon.   

[Jack]

I was asked to work 60 hour weeks until I left (no paid overtime).

For me, that would be a "did I say two week notice? I really meant two minute notice" moment. I mean, when you've already told them you don't need the job, they pick then to try to exert leverage over you? It makes no damn sense!

[benjenn]

I told my boss about 14 months before we first planned to leave because the timing was perfect - we were in the middle of the budget process for 2015 and the could have built another salary/benefits package in the budget to hire someone to start January 1 and have the whole year to train with me (it's a complicated job with different events/meetings each month).  It's now 4 months later and they haven't done anything.

We recently decided DH can retire in July instead of December so I convinced my boss to let me work the last half of the year remotely.  Told him if he would let me do that (so we can move out of state to our beach condo), we could wait until January 2016 to hire my replacement and I would contract to train them remotely.  He's under big budget pressures this year and hiring anyone to replace me was not going to be easy (since it wasn't planned for as I first thought they would.)  He liked the idea and agreed.

So now we're looking at leaving in July versus December and, even though I'll still be working until the end of the year, we'll get to wake up on the beach every day.  So really, my boss' indecision and hesitation paid off for me in the long run!  :)

[Inkedup]

Not meaning to sound dense, but why is it anyone's business to know that you are planning to ER? Is there any reason NOT to tell people that you are quitting your job to explore other options? Especially if you are mulling over the possibility of returning to work at the same place (either on a part-time or full-time basis).     

Maybe I would feel differently if I worked in a familial place and everyone is best friends with the boss and co-workers. However, I would still be afraid to trumpet my plans to ER in a work setting. The last thing I need is to have people thinking/speculating/gossiping that I was wealthy or had acquired a massive inheritance. All they need to know is that I'm leaving my job. My long-term plans and financial situation are no one's business.     

[mak1277]

Not meaning to sound dense, but why is it anyone's business to know that you are planning to ER? Is there any reason to tell people that you are quitting your job to explore other options? Especially if you are mulling over the possibility of returning to work at the same place (either on a part-time or full-time basis).     

Maybe I would feel differently if I worked in a familial place and everyone is best friends with the boss and co-workers. However, I would still be afraid to trumpet my plans to ER in a work setting. The last thing I need is to have people thinking/speculating/gossiping that I was wealthy or had acquired a massive inheritance. All they need to know is that I'm leaving my job. My long-term plans and financial situation are no one's business.     

I guess I agree that it's nobody's business...but my point is that I see no downside to telling people.  Once I retire I fully expect to never see a single one of my co-workers again...so I don't expect they're going to be asking me for money.  Who gives a shit what they think? 

[Inkedup]

In a perfect world I wouldn't give a shit, either.  I do favor honesty as a general rule, but that doesn't mean my whole life has to be an open book. Call me paranoid, but it's a safety issue. You have to protect yourself from people who might try to target you for nonsense lawsuits, etc.

One of the threads on this forum (can't remember the title) discussed whether the outside world views mustachians as "poor" because we are not lavish spenders. It generated a lot of participation. I know my friends think I have no money. And I'm quite happy for people to have that impression of me...I enjoy flying under the radar :)     

[mak1277]

Call me paranoid, but it's a safety issue. You have to protect yourself from people who might try to target you for nonsense lawsuits, etc.

I will call you paranoid on this one...I guess I think more highly of my co-workers than you do.

Edit - I have to admit...I don't even understand this concern, so maybe I'm missing something.  What type of lawsuit are you worried about?   

[Cpa Cat]

How did I miss this! Was there a thread?

At any rate, congratulations!

Thanks. :) I didn't post a thread.

Call me paranoid, but it's a safety issue. You have to protect yourself from people who might try to target you for nonsense lawsuits, etc.

I will call you paranoid on this one...I guess I think more highly of my co-workers than you do.

Edit - I have to admit...I don't even understand this concern, so maybe I'm missing something.  What type of lawsuit are you worried about?   

I am friends with a former coworker who left the same firm that I just left and she said that the reaction to her leaving was extremely negative. They gave her a few papers to sign and slipped in there was an agreement not to compete (she had notified them of her intention to start her own business in the industry). She noticed and refused to sign it. And then they threatened to sue her if she stole any clients. She told them to go for it - our clients are free to hire who they please.

Nothing came of it. She did take a bunch clients.

No such shenanigans occurred when I quit. But I guess I should count myself lucky that all I got was the silent treatment from a grown man in a professional setting. ;)

[mak1277]

Call me paranoid, but it's a safety issue. You have to protect yourself from people who might try to target you for nonsense lawsuits, etc.

I will call you paranoid on this one...I guess I think more highly of my co-workers than you do.

Edit - I have to admit...I don't even understand this concern, so maybe I'm missing something.  What type of lawsuit are you worried about?   

I am friends with a former coworker who left the same firm that I just left and she said that the reaction to her leaving was extremely negative. They gave her a few papers to sign and slipped in there was an agreement not to compete (she had notified them of her intention to start her own business in the industry). She noticed and refused to sign it. And then they threatened to sue her if she stole any clients. She told them to go for it - our clients are free to hire who they please.

Nothing came of it. She did take a bunch clients.

No such shenanigans occurred when I quit. But I guess I should count myself lucky that all I got was the silent treatment from a grown man in a professional setting. ;)

Clearly...I think it's a 100% different situation if you're leaving to join (or in this case become) a competitor of your former employer.  I'm just talking about flat out retiring, never to work again.  I would actually prefer it if nobody ever talked to me while I was at the office, so the silent treatment would be excellent :-)

[AlwaysBeenASaver]

I don't understand the reluctance to tell people the truth in these situations...it would never occur to me to be anything but totally straightforward with my employers about why I was leaving.  I fully intend to tell my employers that I'm retiring when I give my FIRE notice. 

Am I missing something that I should be thinking about?

I think it's similar to the fact that some people are comfortable telling people their net worth/income/whatever, and some aren't. If I tell my boss, co-workers, distant family, etc. that I'm ER, they can make some educated guesses as to my stash, and that makes me uncomfortable. I'm not sure exactly why it makes me uncomfortable, but it does.

[AlwaysBeenASaver]

I'm concerned about giving too much notice and having them decide to let me go before the income events I'm holding out for.

[G-dog]

my concerns have to do with a forced ranking performance review process (I.e. Early notification could impact bonus a pay raise), being in a niche profession and industry (in case I decide/need to go back to a similar job), being a private person (I don't really want to entertain coworker queries), and ingrained guilt (feel the need to 'justify' the decision).

I am likely overthinking this - that is sort of my 'process'.

[Rezdent]

I'm okay with my job now and not planning to FIRE anytime soon but I've had to extricate myself from situations in the past.
I want to throw this out there for anyone in a difficult situation where the brutal truth might not be best:

"After much prayer, meditation,  and soul searching,  God is clearly telling me to start a new phase of life.  What that will be, I am not sure - but I will not argue with God."

I've gotten some funny stares with people when I pull this one out - but to date no one has suggested that this isn't the 'real' reason.  No one has suggested that I argue with God, either.  As the conversation is just between me and God, no one can argue for or against it.

[Daisy]

For me, I'd be vague enough and call it a sabbatical.

Part of the reason is that in case the totally unexpected happens and the plan fails, I don't want to be eating humble pie.

Also, retiring "early" will bring out the worrier in family and friends that would think I have gone nuts and don't really have a good plan. They would have good intentions, but they would drive me nuts with constant advice.

I also prefer to keep humble than be boasting that I would never have to work again. Because, honestly, who among us can guarantee that? Expenses may rise unexpectedly due to health or some catastrophe. I am not vain enough to think I can control all parts of my life.

People know I've made some financial moves lately to protect me from a major layoff. I keep mentioning this is why I paid off my mortgage (to people's surprised eyes...how can you do that in your 40s?) and am cutting costs. I also keep saying I'd like to do something different with my life. I've pre-laid the foundation for my future layoff so people know I'll be OK financially for a while.

Then after a year or two I can assess how it's going and maybe change my story a bit.

[Al1961]

I have a habit of being blunt, so I guess I don't recommend my method of setting the stage for resigning.

Before I decided to ER, I was actively looking for work. Couldn't take the office's dysfunction or the insecurity of my boss anymore. His insecurity manifested itself in the need to try to control everything, and to automatically assume that only he could be correct about any decision. In reality, he came across as second generation "Peter Principled". My peers and I just nodded our heads at him  and then did what we thought was best. He never seemed to figure that out.

Anyway, back on subject, I was called in to his office sometime in April 2014 to discuss my "personal plan", i.e. to hear what he wanted me to work on for my personal and professional development in the coming year. Pay depends on meeting all the "goals", behaviours, and milestones that get incorporated into the plan.

After he'd prattled on for a couple of minutes, I realized that I couldn't stand going through the motions and just blurted out that my plan was to leave the organization. The meeting ended about 5 seconds later.

About a week later, I obtained the CV calculation of my pension buy out and, after assessing our other investments and living expenses, decided to retire instead.
 
A little less bluntly this time,  I informed the director of HR that I had decided to retire, but would stick around until the end of the upcoming audit busy season ( I was the Audit Engagement Leader for three Ministries). That face-to-face meeting was followed-up with a written notice.

Felt good to have the decision formalized.

Al

PS: Anyway, don't be afraid of this, you're in the drivers seat throughout this process

[One Noisy Cat]

   I told my boss several times during the summer that I would be retiring at the end of September. She was good natured about it. I didn't fill out the paperwork until August 25th so she had 5 weeks notice.  Stopped by today-they have 5 people in my department instead of 4 in my day. So I really was doing the work of 2 men (Laurel and Hardy).

[Neustache]

This thread has reaffirmed one thing for me:  only give two weeks.  My husband once gave three weeks and then his boss barely spoke to him, and they still didn't have a replacement figured out before he left.  Also, thanks to someone's story above - be specific - it's not 2 weeks, it's 80 hours of work that you are giving. 

[JohnGalt]

This thread has reaffirmed one thing for me:  only give two weeks.  My husband once gave three weeks and then his boss barely spoke to him, and they still didn't have a replacement figured out before he left.  Also, thanks to someone's story above - be specific - it's not 2 weeks, it's 80 hours of work that you are giving.

I don't know, this should probably depend on your relationship with your employer.  I gave 10 weeks notice at my last job and I wasn't even retiring.  The nature of the work was big, long projects and I was in a key position that I knew would put them in a difficult spot to lose.  I also had (and still have) a very good relationship with the owners of the company. 

At the same time, the employer I had before that was prone to walking people to the door when they gave their notice so I was reluctant to even give them 2 weeks. 

[Spork]

This thread has reaffirmed one thing for me:  only give two weeks.  My husband once gave three weeks and then his boss barely spoke to him, and they still didn't have a replacement figured out before he left.  Also, thanks to someone's story above - be specific - it's not 2 weeks, it's 80 hours of work that you are giving.

I don't know, this should probably depend on your relationship with your employer.  I gave 10 weeks notice at my last job and I wasn't even retiring.  The nature of the work was big, long projects and I was in a key position that I knew would put them in a difficult spot to lose.  I also had (and still have) a very good relationship with the owners of the company. 

At the same time, the employer I had before that was prone to walking people to the door when they gave their notice so I was reluctant to even give them 2 weeks.

Yep.   My immediate boss and I are friends.  I really have no desire to give the FU and walk out on him.

We've talked a bit about my saving and my desire to retire.  On my last review he asked what my goals were for the year and I said "to retire before my next review."  We talked about it a little.... and moved on.

A couple of weeks later I flat out asked "How much notice do you want?  I think I am ready."

He said 6 months.   Now... there is always the possibility that those above him will decide to walk me out before then... but... that's on them.  If they don't need me: I'll be okay with it.

My date is set now for Independence Day.  I compute that to be 81 work days (less vacation, holidays, etc.)

[Rural]

This thread has reaffirmed one thing for me:  only give two weeks.  My husband once gave three weeks and then his boss barely spoke to him, and they still didn't have a replacement figured out before he left.  Also, thanks to someone's story above - be specific - it's not 2 weeks, it's 80 hours of work that you are giving.

I don't know, this should probably depend on your relationship with your employer.  I gave 10 weeks notice at my last job and I wasn't even retiring.  The nature of the work was big, long projects and I was in a key position that I knew would put them in a difficult spot to lose.  I also had (and still have) a very good relationship with the owners of the company. 

At the same time, the employer I had before that was prone to walking people to the door when they gave their notice so I was reluctant to even give them 2 weeks.

Yep.   My immediate boss and I are friends.  I really have no desire to give the FU and walk out on him.

We've talked a bit about my saving and my desire to retire.  On my last review he asked what my goals were for the year and I said "to retire before my next review."  We talked about it a little.... and moved on.

A couple of weeks later I flat out asked "How much notice do you want?  I think I am ready."

He said 6 months.   Now... there is always the possibility that those above him will decide to walk me out before then... but... that's on them.  If they don't need me: I'll be okay with it.

My date is set now for Independence Day.  I compute that to be 81 work days (less vacation, holidays, etc.)

Congrats, Spork. I knew you were close, didn't know you'd made it official.

[Neustache]

When my husband quit, he was friends with his boss.  They joked all the time, went out to lunch together.  When he gave notice, it was awful.  Silent treatment.  Really awkward.  The guy asked for more time, my husband arranged it with the new company to give it to him, and then the boss gave him the silent treatment.  Was really frustrating. 

On the other hand, I've quit places and given loads of time - 1 month or more.  It's been my experience that it doesn't really help my employers.  They still don't have a replacement ready, and they still leave the transition stuff left till the last few days.  All it does for me is make the time feel super long because when I am done, I just want to leave. 

You all can do what you want, and I get the project aspect for some jobs - doesn't really apply to us.  I'm not one to burn bridges, (and have been rehired by places I've quit, multiple times) but I'm kind of done going over board with giving notice when people don't actually use that to their benefit.  Two weeks is plenty, in my opinion, plus if there's a bad reaction (which was totally out of left field for us at my husband's previous job!) it decreases the awkward time.  YMMV. 

[G-dog]

Yep.   My immediate boss and I are friends.  I really have no desire to give the FU and walk out on him.

We've talked a bit about my saving and my desire to retire.  On my last review he asked what my goals were for the year and I said "to retire before my next review."  We talked about it a little.... and moved on.

A couple of weeks later I flat out asked "How much notice do you want?  I think I am ready."

He said 6 months.   Now... there is always the possibility that those above him will decide to walk me out before then... but... that's on them.  If they don't need me: I'll be okay with it.

My date is set now for Independence Day.  I compute that to be 81 work days (less vacation, holidays, etc.)

Congratulations! And I am glad you have such a good relationship with your immediate boss, makes the transition easier and more pleasant.

[Gone Fishing]

  It's been my experience that it doesn't really help my employers.  They still don't have a replacement ready, and they still leave the transition stuff left till the last few days. 

Same here.  I'm really not sure why many employers even bother asking for a notice.

[Spork]

Congrats, Spork. I knew you were close, didn't know you'd made it official.

Thanks.   It's still not well known around the office.  Only my boss and VPs seem to know.  I'm okay with that.

[AlwaysBeenASaver]

  It's been my experience that it doesn't really help my employers.  They still don't have a replacement ready, and they still leave the transition stuff left till the last few days. 

Same here.  I'm really not sure why many employers even bother asking for a notice.

Ditto. I've always given 2 weeks notice, and nothing related to the transition is requested until the last few days.

[Tyler]

I told everyone (boss, coworkers, friends, family) the truth. We're taking a long sabbatical to do non-work things. We don't know when we'll go back to work, or if it will even been in the same industry, but I liked my job and would appreciate the opportunity to work there again in the future. We've saved a bit and have a financial plan but will play it by ear.

Any more info than that would have served no productive purpose and likely done more harm than good. Hard declarations of wealth or retirement were (and remain) completely unnecessary.  The goal was to maintain relationships as they were, just without the work commitment. It's worked out very well.

[Miss Prim]

I had been telling my coworkers and boss that I was going to retire in June, but once I decided to do that, I was getting really cranky thinking about working until then and decided to up it to April. 

I was originally going to stay on contingent/reserve, but after finding out that some things had changed and were discussed on a day that I was not working and no memo or anything was sent out, I decided that I had had enough and was going to just retire permanently.  My boss seems to be jealous and actually said she didn't remember me giving her my retirement date on paper!  I gave her another one stating that I was retiring, not going contingent. 

One of my friends at work who is a year older than me (61), actually told me that he just signed a two year lease on a car, so he has to work 2 more years!  My frugal side was appalled!  I just couldn't imagine making myself work 2 more years for a car!

Thank goodness I have saved my money and don't have to stay longer than necessary.

                                                                      Miss Prim

[Mississippi Mudstache]

It's been interesting to read everyone's attitudes towards telling bosses/co-workers about retiring early. I have to say, I'm surprised there's so much reluctance and pussy-footing in this crowd. I still have years ahead of me, but I envision the day I make my plans known as one of the happiest days of my life. We'll see if I still feel that way when it's time to pull the plug.

So far, I have given notice to three different employers in my career. I gave 1 month, 1 day, and 3 weeks notice, respectively. The '1-day' notice was absolutely the worst employer I've even had. I actually went to work that morning fully intending to give 2 weeks notice, but when I walked into my manager's office, I just said fuck it and told him I was gone at the end of the day. I haven't seen or spoken with him since, although I did fantasize about taking a dump in his company car for some time afterwards. I found out a couple of years later that he was fired a month after I quit.

The other two employers were awesome. My co-workers and managers were genuinely happy for me, and there was no awkwardness at all. I was happy to put in more than the standard two weeks to make the transition easier for them. I'm actually pretty curious to find out how my co-workers react when I when I announce my plans to retire early, rather than just leaving for another company.

[brooklynguy]

I have to say, I'm surprised there's so much reluctance and pussy-footing in this crowd.

It's the same psychological factors that drive OMY syndrome.  Lots of us (myself included) start out saying "the second my stash hits 25x my expenses, fuck that, I'm pulling the FIRE ripcord!"  Then, as we actually approach FIRE, self-doubt starts to creep in, and we want a little more cushion.  I think it's partly the same factor that is causing people to get "pussy-footed" and walk on egg shells to avoid burning bridges when they do pull the FIRE trigger.  Too bad, because it generates fewer epic "FU, I quit!" stories for our voyeuristic reading pleasure.

[Tyler]

When I was two years from FIRE I wanted to shout it from the rooftops.  It was all I thought about, and working towards the finish line was a big part of my identity. 

About a year out, I chilled out a bit and started to really think beyond quitting.  I was fully confident in my plan and no longer desired affirmation from others.  And I became more sensitive to, like it or not, how my words and actions might affect my relationship with people I care about.

When I finally reached my goal, there were no fireworks.  It was more peaceful and surreal than storybook magical.  The next Monday was simply the first free day of many.  We never really felt any need to celebrate or proselytize.  Just to live our lives every day as we see fit.

Today, looking back, I view silent confidence not as pussy-footing but as the ultimate display of strength.

[WhoopWhoop]

I have to say, I'm surprised there's so much reluctance and pussy-footing in this crowd.

It probably depends on the kind of reactions you've received when you quit in the past. I've quit 3 jobs and was fired from one. Only one of those four scenarios was handled well by all parties. The rest were awkward as balls.

[Gone Fishing]

I told everyone (boss, coworkers, friends, family) the truth. We're taking a long sabbatical to do non-work things. We don't know when we'll go back to work, or if it will even been in the same industry, but I liked my job and would appreciate the opportunity to work there again in the future. We've saved a bit and have a financial plan but will play it by ear.

Any more info than that would have served no productive purpose and likely done more harm than good. Hard declarations of wealth or retirement were (and remain) completely unnecessary.  The goal was to maintain relationships as they were, just without the work commitment. It's worked out very well.

Planning to do the same.  My boss is one to pry and is very good at it.  I have promised myself that I will not get lulled into oversharing.

[AlwaysBeenASaver]

I've been thinking a lot about why I don't want to say "I'm retiring." I think some of the reason is I'm not 100% sure I'll never go back to work, there are so many unknowns in the future. And I'm also a quiet person and I don't want to deal with all responses I imagine getting "you're too young to retire" "did you win the lottery" whatever. At the moment I'm thinking I'll say something like "I'm leaving the workforce; I don't know if or when I'll return." Because that's really the truth of it.

[Dr. Doom]

Today, looking back, I view silent confidence not as pussy-footing but as the ultimate display of strength.

Just wanted to say: I really like this perspective.

[mak1277]

The more I think about it, I think your perspective should match the relationship you have with your employer and co-workers.  Personally, I know for sure that after my last day I probably won't ever see a single person from my office again for the rest of my life...except maybe by chance.  So I don't really care what they think of me and how they perceive my exit.

[cazaubon]

I am planning on giving 2 weeks notice when the time comes, as that is what is expected and standard.  My boss and I have been friends for over 15 years, there will be no issues.  We have openly discussed our respective investment strategies and retirement plans many times.  It will be a peaceful parting.

[FFA]

I'm close to my boss. I gave an extended notice (about 6 months) and went to great lengths to minimize any disruption. Also our FIRE involves shifting countries, which creates a very easy storyline for the exit and to avoid the issue of RE.