@Spartana
House and Cars represent status and success in Asian community. People may work their a** off to drive fancy cars and live in a McMansion. One cannot own a house but needs to drive a Mercedes . It's so sad that we are perceived as failures if drive a Toyota. That's probably why one of my friends lives in a basement but drives a BMW.
I know someone who works 3 jobs to barely cover a $400k apartment she mortgaged and a Lexus SUV she leased. I don't understand but I guess that's the reason why it separates me from the rest of them.
Older generations save their entire lives and offer to pay off their kids' college and even their down payment for house. That's one of the many reasons why they can't retire. However, it's also the culture that adult children are expected to take care of their parents when they are old. I see that more and more adult kids are eating on their parents' savings and doing nothing. I think I may need to create a new thread to discuss this phenomenon. It amazes me every time I see adult children ask money from their old parents.
EDIT: cosmetics
I'm married to an immigrant Asian, I learned early on that you don't waste money! We have lived frugaly for 34 years and can REFI, BUT!
She has no interest. I will retire in 19 months.
Yes she still wants to take care of the kids, But I told my daughter when she was young to elope instead of wasting money on a wedding,
and we'd give her the money for a down payment or... She did, so far we funded her Roth for two years and gave her $2000 when she bought a house.
Because that's all she ask for.
Personally I'd be done giving any more, she has a great job and the ability and knowledge that she should live under her income.
I can only hope she is, she says she is.
Although, I suspect if she needed money for something my wife would give more.
My son quit college after two years, quitting college with an Asian mother, ohhhh. That has not been good. :-)
However, today I got an email from him with a form to prove residency for a college, so maybe he's going back.
She hasn't been told yet! If he does go back, I'm sure we will send more support money his way.
We paid my daughters way through college and my son's till he quit. Did get help, they both had high grades
(of course, their Asian, they better:-) and got Florida's Bright Futures Scholarship.
As far as cars, not much show, but she did buy an Avalon we didn't really need 5 years ago, we have not put 2000 miles on it.
She is very patient, and waits for the car she wants at the right price.
We have a small business she says she will keep it running in case the kids need something to fall back on.
I think they see us working 11 hours a day, 7 days a week 363 days a year and have NO interest. (13 years now)
The good thing is, our job is easy 65% of the time, and I can computer surf, watch TV, or walk a 1/2 mile lap near the business.
I can only hope a college education lets them work 40 hours and earn a good wage.
Only 19 more months till I retire.
Anyway, the Asian culture strong work ethic, sacrifice for family is very important, saving face is important.
That one drives my buggy, lots of secrets hidden from family members, and I get put in the position where I'm
expected to support the lie.
Overall, It's been good for me!