Author Topic: Finding purpose post fire  (Read 3023 times)

NorthernMonkey

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Finding purpose post fire
« on: February 11, 2021, 04:09:13 AM »
I ask this question, not as someone who has REd, but as someone who's company is going through a big re-org and who has enough to scrape into RE. (41, pension drawdown from 57, enough after tax savings to bridge the gap with the smallest of margins)

I've found the things that motivate me, and bring me joy, are those which I think are important. They may be small on the overall scale, but I can leap out of bed in the morning because were on the verge of breakthrough in a big project at work, or because I think I can make things better at work by fixing something. The things which bore me to tears are those where I feel like I'm not adding any value, things which are pointless. Supplier reviews, budget planning, HR policies.

I've been thinking what my future might be, and Mrs NM has quite rightly pointed out that I'll go very quickly insane if I don't have any of the things that i need to fix to go and fix.

For those FIREd, how did you find the thing that it was that you needed to do? r

herbgeek

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #1 on: February 11, 2021, 04:35:22 AM »
I just show up each day, and am present, and things present themselves.  Given with Covid, I'm not out and about like I was, but there are still things that grab my attention.  I focus on keeping my mind sharp, and keeping my body physically active.  Pre-covid, I also tried increasing social interactions.  I indulge in my hobbies, I go down internet rat holes when that interests me, I explore new areas with hiking and snow shoeing. 

I'm still looking for a "bigger" project to throw myself into, and I'm sure that will happen after things normalize, but I'm starting to get used to having small things that I enjoy being the reason to jump out of bed.

cool7hand

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #2 on: February 11, 2021, 05:43:21 AM »
This TED talk from Tony Robbins about the six human needs was helpful to me. https://www.ted.com/talks/tony_robbins_why_we_do_what_we_do?language=en

I care most about love, certainty, growth, and contribution. I've structured my FIRE life around them. I spend lots of time with family and friends, which provides love, growth, and contribution. I have a long-term creative endeavor that serves love, growth, and contribution. Because I work on it almost everyday, it also provides certainty. My wife and I love freshwater fishing, and taking others fishing and teaching them, which provides love, growth, and contribution. FIRE itself provides certainty.

Which needs speak to you and how can you find a way to meet them in RE?

Fishindude

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #3 on: February 11, 2021, 01:00:44 PM »
If you don't have hobbies and things outside of work that you are passionate about now, it's unlikely you will if you suddenly stop working.
For those that don't have plenty of outside interests, there isn't a darned thing wrong with continuing to work a job as long as you are physically able.

Malcat

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #4 on: February 11, 2021, 01:11:01 PM »
If you don't have hobbies and things outside of work that you are passionate about now, it's unlikely you will if you suddenly stop working.
For those that don't have plenty of outside interests, there isn't a darned thing wrong with continuing to work a job as long as you are physically able.

I disagree.

I've developed a bunch of interests since retiring. Some of us need the space of not having work for new things to grow in terms of interest and passion.

Everyone is different.

You could take away everything I'm interested in right now, and a pile of new things would just take their place over time.

flyingaway

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #5 on: February 11, 2021, 01:46:26 PM »
If you have enough money, you don't have to work for anyone. That itself is a powerful way of expressing freedom. I would rather watch TV than work for an unpleasant job, if I don't need the money.
But, in most cases, people do need or want the money, usually the more the better. So that is why they keep working.

2sk22

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #6 on: February 11, 2021, 04:09:02 PM »
The whole point of retirement for me is to gain time to study things that I could only graze when working.

In there past couple of months, I have been really digging into the mathematical foundations of computing, studying causal reasoning and learning new programming languages. I have also been getting interested in computational genetics since my older daughter is working in that field.

And I also enjoy playing with my model trains 😀

Malcat

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #7 on: February 11, 2021, 06:16:14 PM »
If you have enough money, you don't have to work for anyone. That itself is a powerful way of expressing freedom. I would rather watch TV than work for an unpleasant job, if I don't need the money.
But, in most cases, people do need or want the money, usually the more the better. So that is why they keep working.

And some of us, like myself and MMM himself, find a lot of joy in projects that also happen to make money, and that's why we work in retirement.

Again, everyone is different.

soccerluvof4

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #8 on: February 12, 2021, 05:25:12 AM »
If you have enough money, you don't have to work for anyone. That itself is a powerful way of expressing freedom. I would rather watch TV than work for an unpleasant job, if I don't need the money.
But, in most cases, people do need or want the money, usually the more the better. So that is why they keep working.

And some of us, like myself and MMM himself, find a lot of joy in projects that also happen to make money, and that's why we work in retirement.

Again, everyone is different.



This^ +1 . I didnt retire to anything it came so quickly so my adjustment took a long time because I was self-employed and had alot of employees constantly asking me questions and so on. So for me its a combination of having really down time now and then going bonkers a week or two on a project. I am one or the other. Only thing I do consistently is going to the gym everyday and reading alot online doing some day trading with 1-2% of my total portfolio not to try and Beat the market but more as a hobby. So that is where I am sure I am different.

chevy1956

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #9 on: February 12, 2021, 02:47:59 PM »
I'm less then 6 months retired. It was a little tough the first month or two but now I'm hitting my stride. I've just been playing guitar, reading and doing jiu-jitsu. There are all activities I did prior to RE. I just do those activities more often.

I find I spend less time on the Internet or watching TV.

I don't miss work at all.

rae09

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #10 on: February 12, 2021, 08:27:49 PM »
I'm on my 5th month and I kind of miss work. I always wondered why would people work when they have enough money. I raced so hard to the finish line and now that I'm here, I can finally understand why. To some people (I mean me), it's not so much about the money anymore. I like the challenge, I like learning, I like expanding my knowledge. I do enjoy doing nothing for short period of time but I can't enjoy it when it seems that I have forever to spend. But that's okay too. Not everyone is the same and I gave up expecting myself to be like everyone else.

You can always find something else to do if you get bored and full retirement doesn't suit you. But you won't know until you try.

BreakBad

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #11 on: February 16, 2021, 12:40:41 PM »
"You won't know until you try" is great advice.

I decided after 18 months of retirement to get busy living. Nothing was fulfilling for long... volunteering, golf, gardening, hiking, etc. So for me, it meant taking advantage of the pandemic bringing remote work to every opportunity, and getting a job. Been exciting, but after 6 months the shine is starting to wear off. Some of us are just naturally restless, and hoping we'll age-out of our restlessness at some point.

We're all seeking answers on what will make us happy and fulfilled. Wish I had more advice to offer.

HenryDavid

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #12 on: February 16, 2021, 01:35:36 PM »
Same purposes as before.
Just more time to devote to them without having to work.

(Learning, creating, friends, fitness/health).

NorthernMonkey

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #13 on: February 17, 2021, 12:31:07 AM »
Thanks Guys,

like most people, my friends are roughly the same age as me, and as such, they all slave away 9 - 5. I do some volunteer work now, but its at a weekend only. Too much time during the week might be a problem. Maybe i need a part time job to keep me sane.

Its not that I dont like my job, I just dont like doing ANYTHING 5 days a week. If i could do it 2 days a week, it would be amazing.

Playing with model trains for the remainder of the time also doesnt sound too bad a plan

ItsALongStory

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #14 on: February 18, 2021, 10:56:38 AM »
I am 6 months into what I've been calling an open ended sabbatical. Our plan was to travel extensively throughout Europe but clearly that wasn't gonna happen until COVID was behind us.

Fitness is the only thing I've really gotten any structure around and I'm struggling to ignite passions in other areas. Hopefully our relatively strict lockdown will lift soon and we can do more hiking and exploring but it won't be as planned until the summer at the earliest. I'm diving into a bunch of different topics through online learning platforms and seeing what sticks.

HotTubes

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #15 on: February 18, 2021, 07:42:59 PM »
You sound like you would be an awesome colleague, loves to get stuff done and feel a sense of accomplishment, but not a fan of the trappings of the corporate world.  I know a recent retiree who fits this mold - he learned how to fix complex dental equipment and works for himself (narrow skill, deep fee), when and how he wants.  He does things to his standard and no one else's.  You might be that kind of person and maybe you'll find something like that (fixing model train engines??? - repairing expensive phono cartridges, etc).

Cool thing about retirement seems to be (I'm FI, not RE yet) that you have the space to find that thing that speaks to you.

For me, my interests aren't interests, they are abiding passions that can never be accomplished, only sought.

Malcat

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #16 on: February 19, 2021, 07:47:09 AM »
You sound like you would be an awesome colleague, loves to get stuff done and feel a sense of accomplishment, but not a fan of the trappings of the corporate world.  I know a recent retiree who fits this mold - he learned how to fix complex dental equipment and works for himself (narrow skill, deep fee), when and how he wants.  He does things to his standard and no one else's.  You might be that kind of person and maybe you'll find something like that (fixing model train engines??? - repairing expensive phono cartridges, etc).

Cool thing about retirement seems to be (I'm FI, not RE yet) that you have the space to find that thing that speaks to you.

For me, my interests aren't interests, they are abiding passions that can never be accomplished, only sought.

I've started studying something that I NEVER EVER would have expected to become an expert in pre-FIRE.

That really is the beauty of it, having the mental space to get to know parts of yourself you never had the chance to know before.

I've always enjoyed seeing the future as a total unknown, because I love seeing the cool things that can pop up in life when you're open to them and have the time to explore them.

MasterStache

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #17 on: February 21, 2021, 07:53:41 AM »
Start practicing mindfulness. Toss in a bit of meditation. Finding "purpose" isn't actually that difficult. Feeling the need to always be accomplishing something is often the result of always living in the future. You can still accomplish whatever you want, but learning to be content no matter what you are doing is invaluable.   

nirodha

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #18 on: February 21, 2021, 09:13:06 AM »
Its not that I dont like my job, I just dont like doing ANYTHING 5 days a week. If i could do it 2 days a week, it would be amazing.

This is a very solvable problem. Assuming you are good at your job and ready to walk away, you have tremendous leverage.

NorthernMonkey

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #19 on: February 21, 2021, 10:07:39 AM »
Its not that I dont like my job, I just dont like doing ANYTHING 5 days a week. If i could do it 2 days a week, it would be amazing.

This is a very solvable problem. Assuming you are good at your job and ready to walk away, you have tremendous leverage.

My job is going to change from a couple of weeks time. They're taking away my direct reports and budget responsibility, and moving me into delivering more stuff. It's a sort of demotion, but I'm keeping the same pay and benefits, (and I hate looking after budgets) Its also a role which is much more suited to part time work. Its difficult to manage a team when youre only there 2 days a week

ItsALongStory

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Re: Finding purpose post fire
« Reply #20 on: March 08, 2021, 12:14:15 PM »
I am 6 months into what I've been calling an open ended sabbatical. Our plan was to travel extensively throughout Europe but clearly that wasn't gonna happen until COVID was behind us.

Fitness is the only thing I've really gotten any structure around and I'm struggling to ignite passions in other areas. Hopefully our relatively strict lockdown will lift soon and we can do more hiking and exploring but it won't be as planned until the summer at the earliest. I'm diving into a bunch of different topics through online learning platforms and seeing what sticks.

Quick follow up. As part of my search I had reached out to several non-profits that are active in a passion area (financial literacy) of mine. One got back to me right around the time of my prior response and we have been going back and forth. It's yet to be formalized but I'm likely to take on a relatively sizeable role in this organization since I have a ton of time on my hands. I may need to start my own thread to leverage the collective brainpower here cause first impressions are that there is a lot of room for improvement and I want to go about it smartly.