Grumbly brumbles last night after a long day, ask girlfriend "WHAT DINNAR HAS U!" whilst brandishing a hefty oaken club.
Girlfriend, "Uh... I made some rice earlier?"
"AH HAH! WICE!" says I. "ME EAT WICE!"
Hunted and gathered in the fridge for some green onions (tops were a little sad, but bottom half of the stalk was good), half of a red onion (center layer was trying to do something sciency, tossed that), drained black beans, soy sauce, sesame oil, canola oil, salt and pepper, and threw it all in a wok. Two fried eggs on top, then smothered it in sweet red chili sauce.
It's sort of a bad Korean bibimbap, but by the end I had turned from a caveman back into a normal person. And I cleaned out half of the old veg in the fridge while I was at it.