The Money Mustache Community
Other => Off Topic => Topic started by: thedayisbrave on December 09, 2015, 05:15:18 PM
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So, I poll a lot of people on this topic... at what point in your relationship did you realize you wanted to marry your SO? The overwhelming majority say things along the lines of: "I just knew" or "It was so easy and happened so naturally".
Please share :) How/when did you "know"? Was there anything specific that happened, or was it just a random realization?
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I never did.
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On the first date. Afterwards I texted my sister to let her know I planned to marry this man. That was more than five happy years ago. Wedding is next year :-)
It was easy for me. He had the most incredible intellectual capacity, pulled me up when I used sloppy logic and debated issues with me fiercely right there in the restaurant. I knew he'd keep me on my toes. I knew I'd met my match when he grilled me on my politics over the appetisers. I could say other stuff about his beautiful eyes, blah blah blah, but really it was his brain. I need a partner I can admire and respect (he says the same thing). No one else I've met can compare (he says the same thing). He's a nice person and all that other stuff, too, but oh boy... that fierce intelligence. That's where it's at.
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I walked into my office one day in early February, 1982. There was a very attractive 18 year old lady sitting at my desk. She started work there that day and was waiting for the manager etc. We became friends very quickly but took a couple of years to launch a relationship. We will be 30 years married next year! You know when you know!
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Somebody else had to tell me. Really.
I had this best friend that I spent EVERY waking moment with while in Bible College. Somebody said, Hey, how can you be so close and you're NOT getting married or dating? At that moment I knew I didn't want to ever lose him. We prayed separately about it. That week of not speaking to each other while we prayed made an impression. God told us clearly, YES. We married 6 months later.
That was 11 years ago. No regrets. We are very happy.
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Amigo Express.
I needed a ride for a nearby town, he was on the same car going to the same town.
We didn't have a common language then, but while he's chatting with the driver I catch a name I reconize and I ask if they're talking about XY, the guy that lives in front of blablah metro station. We discover we have a friend in common.
Fast forward one week, and said friend in common invites me to one of his parties. Then another one. Then another one. FutureDH always there, always trying to pick me up, but again, we didn't have a common language, so I never accepted because well, what could he want from me, consider we can't have a conversation?
Then we start chatting on Facebook (god bless WordReference) and we discover we indeed have a lot in common, including several friends/acquaintances. We keep meeting to parties, and one day while he's trying to explaining me something I thought that he could be talking to a girl that spoke his language, or you know, any girl that had not been almost-ignoring him for 4 months and not even replying to his proposition of dates. I decided to give it a try. Sex was absolutely amazing, so we started seeing each other regularly and I learn his language.
Four years later, we bought a house together, we're planning to start a family, and we're the happier we've ever been
ETA: I didn't read carefully and I didn't reply to the main question. I didn't have a A-ha! moment, it was more a cumulation of layers, little things that added up. I'm a boiled frog!
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I was walking down the hall at work and I was thinking about her, and it just suddenly occurred to me that I couldn't imagine my life without her.
Of course it took me two years to finally get the gumption to ask her.
Also I think she knew by our third date, but she's not telling.
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I was walking down the hall at work and I was thinking about her, and it just suddenly occurred to me that I couldn't imagine my life without her.
Of course it took me two years to finally get the gumption to ask her.
Also I think she knew by our third date, but she's not telling.
Ah, these are all lovely... please keep them coming :)
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We met through mutual friends at a bar. It wasn't a setup or anything, we just both happened to be out with mutual friends and met that way. We spent pretty much the whole evening talking to each other. He called the next day and asked me out. We had coffee 2 days later and talked for 4 hours.
I knew at about the 3 week mark that I was going to marry him, which would have been after about 6 dates. Without me even saying anything to anyone about how I felt (I thought it was crazy that I was so sure right away), other people started asking when we were getting married after about a month. I think it was just obvious to everyone. I remember my mom saying to me "Well you know you hear about those couples that get married after 2 weeks. Maybe that is you guys." She just said it to me out of the blue.
We moved in together at the 3 month mark, bought at house at 8 months, got engaged after 12 months and married a year later. We've been together for 9 years total now. Every year, I think to myself that it couldn't possibly get any better. And then miraculously it does. My life isn't perfect by any means (chronic illness, family issues, fertility struggles) but I do feel fortunate that my marriage is relatively easy.
People still comment on it. I had a coworker say to me once "I've never seen two people more devoted to each other than the two of you." In the interview for my husband's current job, they asked him about willingness to travel. His response was "I'm willing and able to travel but I really don't want to. I love my wife so much that I can't stand to be away from her." I told him that probably wasn't a good interview response but he did get the job so I guess it turned out okay.
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We met when we were eight. I had just moved to his church and was shy, so he hid behind a door until I walked by and he could jump out and corner me to make me talk. We've been best friends ever since. We had always "known", but were both too scared to put our feelings into words incase the other didn't feel the same. It wasn't until high school graduation that we started dating and married a year later.
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Well, I'm a little reluctant to call anyone "The One" as I was previously married, but I feel very optimistic about my current relationship. We started discussing the possibility of long-term/marriage before we even met in person.
I had been separated for 6 months and felt like starting to date again, so I made a profile on an online dating site. I tried to make my profile as offputting to the wrong type of man as possible, without disclosing every quirk or personality trait. My man happened to find my profile doing a search, even though I'm older than his typical search criteria. We started emailing, then texting, then phone talking. We hit it off immediately and were both equally enamored of the other.
The first contact was on a Wednesday. The first phone call was that Sunday, then by Wednesday we'd decided to spend almost $800 for me to fly to meet him. (Well over 2000 km from Winnipeg, Manitoba to Yellowknife, Northwest Territories.) We met that Friday, 6 days after the first phone call. Our expectations were very high by then, and we'd discussed all the big topics that one should discuss prior to marriage. Our in-person time lasted 3 days and it went even better than we hoped/expected. Just an instant really good, mature, intimate, and fun relationship.
Sadly I went home and we thought about things. As there was no way for us to date normally and long-distance was very difficult, about 10 days later we decided that I would move in with him. We both agreed the relationship had significant potential and we'd rather have it end, than never know what could have been. I moved to my new city 5 weeks after our first 3 day meeting.
It's been about 6 weeks living together now and things are mostly going great - no regrets at all. The only trouble spots are the usual things people face like work, health issues, plus the extreme climate here is a bit hard for me (I only see daylight on weekends right now and above -20C is considered warm). But we've been able to communicate and support each other through the issues.
My man was instantly ready for a marriage-equivalent relationship, and better at doing that than my ex-husband ever was. It seems likely that we'll get married eventually (we generally talk that way), but because I've already been divorced once I'm reluctant to make that decision too quickly. I think I'll wait at least 2 years, though it seems likely we'll buy a house together before that.
So that's the long answer. The short story is that I just wanted to go on a date, and instead got a common-law, fully committed, serious relationship. And I'm happy about that because my man and I are extremely compatible.
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I took a certification course for my career about 5 years ago and met this nice guy. A year later we were looking for more employees at my job so I called him up since we became good friends. I got him a job working with me. He is about 15 years older than me. He started dating a woman while we were working together. She had daughters, and I thought one was cute so he told me to get in touch with her on FB. I did, and that's where everything started. She was 18 and I was 23. That was 3.5 years ago. Everything just took off from there! We are getting married in less than a month. I since left that job. He did a year ago, then he got me a job working with him! Crazy how things work. She is the most rational and easy going woman I have ever met. She loves all the same hobbies, movies, foods, etc. we do everything together and I wouldn't have it any other way.
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I used to see around town this mysterious and beautiful young Asian woman with long silky black hair, always dressed very simply in jeans and running shoes, usually by herself, but I could never find the courage to say hello and approach her. Then one day, unexpectedly, we finally met at an event designed to match ESL students with tutors. I knew right away she was the one when we were introduced by a common friend who was also an ESL teacher. Unfortunately, before I even had the chance to say anything intelligent to her, a bubbly Vietnamese girl who later became one of my best friends, jumped the queue and decided that I was going to be her tutor. I could see she was a bit disappointed, perhaps a bit jealous, that I had "chosen" another student, but it was my fault, I had been way too slow to react and I didn't know how to correct my mistake. But despite this first setback, I didnt give up, and found "creative" ways to bump into her "by accident" at the store or the coffee shop, but every time I asked her out for coffee or a drink, she'd turn me down...disappointed, I gave up, left town for 10 months to travel the world in search of a heart of gold, which I didn't find. When I came back, she was still there, as beautiful and simple as before, and I realized she was the one I wanted to be with. I asked her out for coffee, and to my surprise, she accepted. Then a second coffee date came. And a third. Then out of the blue, she asked me where my Vietnamese girlfriend was. Taken aback, it took me a lot of efforts to convince her I was and had been single and interested in her all along. I'm still not sure, to this day, she believed me entirely. But we continued dating, and it started to feel so right, so perfect. A couple of months after we started dating, I accepted an executive job with the government. After staring at my computer screen in my nice corner office like a zombie for a couple of days, I felt I was suffocating and realized I didn't want to be there. I was a little apprehensive to tell her I wanted to quit so quickly such a well paying job, but when I told her how I felt, she simply replied that money and career were the least of her concerns and she only wanted to live a simple life with me. That nailed it down for me. Turned out she was even more frugal than me...Nine months later, we eloped to Las Vegas and got married by Elvis the next day...the rest is history!
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Excellent thread Dayisbrave! I loved reading the stories.
My favorite "how we met" story belongs to the parents of my oldest friend.
Beth was a cute girl working in the local bookstore and the mall and Terry worked in the record store in the same mall. Terry's friend and roommate went to go ask Beth out and she said no. Terry is later in the bookstore chatting her up and says him and his friends are having a party later, if she'd like to "stop by." Beth looks him right in the eye and says "I don't stop by, but you can pick me up at 8."
They've been married for almost 40 years. Me, my friend and her mom (ie Beth) were on a trip in Europe a few years ago and Terry emailed her every day, he missed her so much! It was adorable.
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Saw some chick on some ship. Shamelessly flirted with chick on a ship. Flirting utterly ignored.
Persisted in flirting. Flirting remained unnoticed.
Time passes.
One more try. Failure. Sucked up courage. Admitted to flirting. Admitted to attraction. Much puzzlement. Chick is flirt-proof (to this day does not recognize sexy married-people flirting). Simply asked on date. SUCCESS!
One day I made her laugh. Throw her head back and laugh without thinking. I knew. I bought a ring that day, but it was still in transit when she proposed to me.
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I met DH when I was 13 and he was 14 at the local bowling alley. He was actually "dating" my best friend at the time. (Not really sure how seriously you can "date" at 13-14.) We became friends immediately - we had a lot in common. We remained friends until my junior year in high school. One day after class, I found a single red rose and a card talking about how we didn't have a lot of time to spend together but what little time we did share was of utmost importance on my car windshield. I was dating another guy at the time and thought he had left the rose and card, but he had not. I soon figured out DH had done it. I continued the relationship with the other guy for a couple more weeks. I thought at the time that DH and I could be more than friends, but I wasn't ready to risk the friendship yet. About 4 months later, I decided to go on my first official date with DH. (We went to Wendy's for Frosties). We went to the movies a couple of times and continued to hang out for about another month. After leaving the county fair one night, he gave me his class ring. (He never even actually asked me to be his girlfriend.) It was just mutually understood that we were now boyfriend and girlfriend. I'm not exactly sure when I knew, but shortly after he gave me his ring, I knew I'd marry him one day. We dated for almost six years before getting married and we've been happily married for five and a half years now :)
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Mr. Trede and I met online, but the OP asked when I knew he was The One. I knew I was in love with him our first Halloween, we'd been dating maybe a month and a half. We both dressed up and met another couple at a club. I can't remember the song that was playing, but he and I danced and I was so into him that when the song was over we were somewhere on the other side of the dance floor from where we began and I had no clue where our table was. I just remember spinning and spinning, looking into his eyes. That was the night the gypsy fell in love with a zombie...
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The temptation is there to share the story of how Lady Snow and I came together...but I think I'll save that one for some upcoming Meetups. :)
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Long story short: I hit him with a stick.
Longer story:
We met in a game of Amtgard on campus. At first, I thought he was kind of a weirdo and wasn't very trusting. In time though, after beating him in the fine art of foam sword fighting, I began to warm up to him and we decided to try our hands at dating. I found that, beneath his awkward face he was putting on, he was very kind and gentle. He had a soft heart, and a gentle spirit. We fell in love pretty fast and moved in together.
At the time, I was going through a very difficult period in life and was pretty unstable in the head. I was just an emotional mess. Most people I know would have dumped me due to stress and left. Not him. He stuck by me, and after it was over, I knew he was going to be my husband. It seemed that he had decided I was "the one" earlier than I did too. Lol
On my birthday, he took me out to my favorite restaurant and proposed to me. I said "yes" so fast, he barely had time to finish. I was so happy. He then proceeded to put trick candles on my birthday cake.
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I had been socializing with this new guy in groups, and had been out to dinner with him just once...we both were dealing with some losses and rough times in life with tragedies happening to our kids...I just needed a low-key break and to relax over wine and have an adult conversation that did not involve hospitals, ambulance calls, etc. So I practically invited myself over to his apartment. When I walked in there for the first time, I just felt at home. I could see that we had similar tastes and liked to live the same way. We talked for four hours--had a wonderful time--no funny stuff, not even a good night kiss (that came a month later...talk about fireworks!)...but I knew I had found The One. Just a normal, ordinary man from the neighborhoods...but not ordinary after all...Extraordinary!
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We lived on the same hall freshman year in college. My roommate had a crush on his roommate, but she was shy and I was less so.
So I would walk down the hall to knock on their door and ask if they wanted to walk to the dining hall. But often the roommate was out, so it was just me... asking Mr. FP.
I thought, "This is terrible! J. has a crush on D., but it's going to look like I have a crush on S." We were engaged two months later.
Incidentally, my roommate never got any traction with Mr. FP's roommate. Eventually, she married a guy from the floor below ours (yes, from our freshman dorm) instead and D. came out as gay. The girl across the hall married a guy from downstairs, too. We are all still friends.
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Haven't found her yet.
Posting to follow.
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After a couple years with very little social life, I took a job with a company with lots of smart, single young people. Any night you wanted to go for a drink after work, you could easily line up about a dozen friends. I always had my eye on my future hubby, but we were both a little shy and unsure. We spent so much time talking, always with groups of friends, and I realized that we were so much alike. I never liked arguing (too much of that in my childhood home), so I was happy to be so attracted to a guy who matched my feelings about all the important things - politics, religion, personal finance. After knowing each other for a year, we dated for 3, and lived together for 1 year, then married. That was 27 years ago, and we are both very happy.
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I sat in on lectures I wasn't signed up to for three months straight so that I could sit next to the woman who ended up being my wife.
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Mr. Mandalay was the classmate of one of my coworkers. He used to stop in to my job to give her paperwork (I guess she missed a lot of classes), but I noticed he would linger. Then he started saying "hi" to me and we'd make small talk. Then one day he came in and he was really shuffling and looking uncomfortable. He asked me if I'd seen Titanic yet. I said that I hadn't, and he said "Well ... would you like to go see it with me?" I said yes and he positively beamed. After the movie we went to Denny's and talked until six in the morning. He proposed seventeen days later, we were married six months after that, and in January it'll be eighteen years together.
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The first time I looked at him and saw how his eyes look when he smiles... forget it. I was done, he was done, it was just us from there on out. I didn't voluntarily go longer than an 8-hour work shift without seeing him for years after that first day we met. Corny, yeah, sure... but it worked for us. 12 years together, 10 married, and I still have a huge crush on this guy.
(Obviously, we did go out on some dates and compare values and such before shacking up, as neither of us are total morons.)
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Mr. SP and I met at work. We were both working retail pharmacy - he was just finishing his internship. I did not like him! Our working styles were totally different, and he drove me nuts. When he got licensed, he was transferred to a different store, and I was relieved. A couple of years later, we met up again briefly. Then he started showing up while I was working, usually with the excuse he was "just in the neighbourhood". He would ask me to go for coffee, and I would always say no, it was too busy for that. Finally my boss told me to put the poor guy out of his misery, and go for coffee already. What? I was totally clueless, and did not know Mr. SP was trying to signal he liked me. I still thought I didn't like him. Turned out, when we didn't have to work together, we got along great. He asked me to marry him after 4 dates, which I thought was ridiculous. I said no. He asked again a year and a half later, and this time, I said yes. We've been married for almost 37 years, and together for 39. But I still wouldn't work with him. : D
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I sat in on lectures I wasn't signed up to for three months straight so that I could sit next to the woman who ended up being my wife.
That's dedication! Did you know her already?
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She became roomies with one of my best friends, we hit it off and now I just bought a ring. I asked her dad for his blessing to propose yesterday.
I was halfway done asking when he told me "Don't be nervous, I am not very good at this either but read this." And he gave me a note that he had written the night before that said,
"I hoped someday someone would ask me for my daughter's hand, for the special act of doing so speaks volumes of a man, one who believes in tradition and the showing of respect means a lot to me as ___'s father but it's what I did expect for her to find that special one she truly does deserve. Someone who loves her constantly and holds nothing in reserve. If this is how you feel for her then true blessings come from me. I think you'll make a special part of my great family tree. Welcome aboard and best wishes to you both."
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3rd date. Connection was/is based on intellectual attraction. We think similarly and really enjoy engaging each other, proactively and re-actively. Best time if the week is after church on Sunday sitting on our porch swing, sipping some Joe, reviewing the previous weeks' challenges and planning for the next. 12yrs later it's still awesome.
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I sat in on lectures I wasn't signed up to for three months straight so that I could sit next to the woman who ended up being my wife.
That's dedication! Did you know her already?
Nope. I subscribe to the 'stalk until they notice you' model of dating.
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Posting to follow, I don't think I'll ever "know".
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I sat in on lectures I wasn't signed up to for three months straight so that I could sit next to the woman who ended up being my wife.
That's dedication! Did you know her already?
Nope. I subscribe to the 'stalk until they notice you' model of dating.
I found this both adorable and creepy! Sometimes you have to walk the line for love :-)
Congratulations that it worked GuitaStv!
I also loved your story Spartana.
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I sat in on lectures I wasn't signed up to for three months straight so that I could sit next to the woman who ended up being my wife.
That's dedication! Did you know her already?
Nope. I subscribe to the 'stalk until they notice you' model of dating.
I also pretty much did that for several month with the One, I "manufactured" accidental encounters...
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We met online in 2009. Not a dating site, not social media, not even a forum, but that awful site Omegle. Omegle sets you up one-on-one with a random "Stranger" to chat with, one-on-one (no accounts, usernames, or anything initially identifying).
My first words to her were "Don't you hate carpet stores that charge extra for the underpadding?" I know, I'm a real charmer.
I knew she was "the one" when I laid my eyes on her after landing at the Phoenix airport in 2011. She moved across the country in early 2012 and we bought our first house (she was 19, I was 20).
We're not married yet, but she's definitely "the one." That'll probably happen next year sometime.
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Dancing at a club... true story. Neither of us really did that kind of stuff, just so happens the one time we were both out we met. The funniest part was it wasn't actually the first time we met... she realized the first time she came over to watch a movie that her and a friend had applied to rent the other side of the duplex that I owned years before. Since I already had accepted a new tennant I had to turn her and the friend down. Please believe she will never forget and it's her favorite story to tell . We are now married and I couldnt imagine my life without her!
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Saw some chick on some ship. Shamelessly flirted with chick on a ship. Flirting utterly ignored.
Persisted in flirting. Flirting remained unnoticed.
Time passes.
One more try. Failure. Sucked up courage. Admitted to flirting. Admitted to attraction. Much puzzlement. Chick is flirt-proof
Well when you are the only chick on a boat in a sea full of guys you become flirt-proof very fast :-)! Glad you persisted and that it worked out well.
My story is more about "The One Who Got Away" - although we were married for 17 years and together for almost 20 so I guess he hung out for awhile. Like Sailor Sam we met not exactly on a ship but at a school our respective ships sent us to. Me the only female, him one guy in a sea of many. He was smart, mega good looking, fun, shy, nice, liked by all. We were attracted to each other instantly but got to know each other as friends first and then, as the crazy hot attraction grew (which we chose to ignore because of the job), we took a month-long leave together after the school was done and before we went back to our ships - mine in Maine and his in New Orleans. It was a wild month and we kept in touch afterwards and visited when we could but remained free to see other people if we wanted (thinking it was just a fling that wouldn't go anywhere because of our jobs). After a couple of years of that we realized we were crazy in love with each other and knew that we wanted to be together - plus we both realized not too many other people would accept either of us, or our jobs, without a lot of complaining - so we married. Divorced now amicably but couldn't ask for a better "One"!
You speak so fondly of him, Spartana. Why did you two divorce?
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I love all of your stories!!! Keep them coming.
I met my wife when I was home on leave. My sister (future wife's roomi at college) created a situation where we would all be together hanging out. After being warned on many occasions by my sister to be "cool" and not embarrass her - I did exactly that. And had hardly any interactions with my future DW.
Next encounter: my sister's wedding. Started talking to future-DW and she was a bit standoffish because she was shy and figured I was just being nice. I offered her my jacket and a ride home and was denied.
Third encounter: asked her out for a hike. There were certain "requirements" in girls I dated - one was a love of being outdoors - among others. She accepted. We hiked and talked endlessly. I wondered if after that date if she was "the one". I had dated my share of girls/women along the way but this one seemed different in some fundamental ways. All of the girlfriends before each had some long term fatal flaw. Not this one. Maturity, motivation, sophistication, etc. She was a keeper and I hoped she felt the same way.
Asked her camping with a group of friends a few weeks later and she accepted. It was 20F-25F that weekend and she was a good sport about the cold - this is the south - we don't do 20F as willingly as you Canucks. ;)
We started a year and then some of her driving up to spend the weekend with me and our time kept getting better and better. Certainly committed.
I proposed on a camping trip to a nat'l park in my old VW Westfalia. I buried her engagement ring in the bottom of a box of Cracker Jacks. Corny but we love to laugh. She said she knew something was up. ;)
She'd been the center of my universe ever since.
She's been so many important parts of my life. For example - she's been the best sounding board I've ever met listening to me work my way through life's challenges and frustrations. I think without her my family might have driven me crazy along the way. ;) Lots of rides home after weekend visits with the extended family with her comparing notes together and almost always having similar opinions and assessments. Thanks you DW for 18 years of happy marriage and 20 years together.
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I love sappy stuff like this.
DH and I met in high school, and started dating our senior year. We made it through long-distance, then moving in together, the death of loved ones, and grad school before we got married. It is hard for me to pin down a specific event/thing that made me know that he was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. It always just felt right; it was never dramatic or overwrought or crazy like so many of our other friends' relationships that we've seen come and go (not to mention the ones we had with other people before we got together).
Although, for a few years before he proposed, I nagged quite a bit about getting hitched because I KNEW I wanted to be married to him, but he thought we should finish college first. My grandmother - who we were both very close to - passed away during our senior year of college, and his support through that ordeal was so incredible and so gracious, that I let go of "having" to be married. I felt like if this is the man I'm with and I've got him for any amount of time, I don't care if we get married or not, I just want him with me in whatever capacity I can have him. He proposed to me a week later.
We've been together for fifteen years, married for almost ten, and I am always astonished at how much more I love him now than I did when I was seventeen. I'm really grateful that we grew up together and that who we've become is still a really good couple in a really good marriage who have a really good time and who actually like each other. A blogger I like to read on occasion put it well when she said, "I think over the years love changes from gazing into each others' eyes to seeing your whole history in somebody's eyes." Heavy shit, man.
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This is a great thread, I love all of the stories. For me, I met my wife at a bar/dance club. She actually secretly bought me a drink. I wasn't even supposed to be out that night, it was a last minute going away thing for a friend leaving town. This particular club has several bars, I had been in the dance area, but moved to a bar in the back to chat with my friends and have a beer. The bartender came over to deliver a fresh beer and I inquired about where it came from. She told me someone at the other end of the bar bought it for me. I caught a glimpse of my wife leaving the bar and heading back to the dance area. I was pretty sure I had seen her earlier. So now my friends were all eager to know who this was that bought me the beer. We went back to the dance area and I pointed out my wife, as I was pretty sure the beer came from her. She was on the dance floor with someone at the time. My friends kept telling me that I needed to cut in, but I'm actually very introverted until I get to know someone. So my friend actually dragged me onto the dance floor, no joke this happened. To avoid a scene I finally let go of the bar and went. My friend walked up to the person dancing with my wife and said may I cut in and pushed me towards my wife to dance with her. We danced for a bit and then went to another bar area to talk. My wife offered to buy me a beer to which I replied, I think you already did. We have been inseparable ever since. That was over 25 years ago September 15, 1990. We moved in together within a couple of months and I proposed on Christmas hoping for a 1 year engagement and getting married on New Year's Day 1992. We had trouble with the church and counseling sessions getting scheduled, so we weren't able to actually get married until February 29, 1992. Yes we got married on leap year, it's still funny to us. To answer the original question, I can't say exactly when I knew, but I knew very soon in the relationship that she was the one!
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Awww! This thread is so sweet. I love it :)
DH and I don't have the sweetest story. But most of our friends get a good laugh out of it.
In a drunken stupor I smacked his ass at a Halloween party at a bar. We both were waiting for our respective drivers to stop making out. He found out we had some mutual friends and asked me out a week later. On our 3rd date I passed out on a diner table and told him I loved him as he poured me into the car. He told me the next morning he loved me too. We were together for 3 years before getting married.
He somehow fell in love with me at the height of my addiction and has stood with me through my recovery. It's not the sweetest story but I'm still a lucky gal :)
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How We met I became very close friends with a guy in high school, we played tennis together. I started hanging out with his group of friends a lot, and one of his friends was a girl who I thought was just the most beautiful, kind, fun person in the whole world. I was 16 and she was 15.
How We Started Dating Our first kiss was literally on New Years Eve of Y2K at a gathering with all her friends. After that, I wanted to take her on a date. Her parents had a rule that she couldn't date until she was 16 in March. I called her parents and explained to her mother that her daughter had all of the qualities that I was looking for in a girl to date. I told her that I would understand and wait until she turned 16 if she wanted, but that I would like to take her on a date sooner. Her mom was apparently impressed, and agreed to let me take her on a date. I took her to Toy Story 2, and we were officially a couple after that!!!
The Breakup We basically were always perfect for each other. We enjoy each others company, have similar temperaments and personalities, and just have fun. We never argued or got into drama. However, near the end of my Freshman year of college, I broke up with her. Our relationship was going very well, but I figured that having dated since we were 15 and 16 years old, we hadn't had ANY other relationships. I told her that I wanted her to date someone else and try to find someone that she enjoyed being around more than me. I told her that I wanted to do the same. I told her that if either of us could find someone we liked more, then it's a good thing we broke up. And if not, then it's just as good, because we'll get back together and know that we really are meant to be together.
What I did After this, I figured, well, I better start dating girls right now!!! I asked several girls out on dates, but never got past a couple dates. I never wanted to because I would realize very quickly that the girl was not nearly as awesome as she was. I dated very smart, fun, attractive people, who on paper should be the type of people I'd want to be with, but nope...not as good...not even close!!!
What she did She got into a steady relationship with a guy and dated him for several months. She didn't like him as much as me (I didn't know this at the time), but dating me wasn't an option, and she did like him, so that was that.
And then what After about a year apart I asked her to have dinner with me. I told her I learned that no matter how awesome of a person I met, they weren't going to compare to her. I told her that she obviously had the right to stay in her current relationship with Shane (I think that was his name), but that I was not going to date anyone else, and that my new goal in life was to convince her to date me again and someday to marry me. Apparently that's what she wanted to hear. A week later she broke off her relationship and we resumed dating.
And Finally We continued to date throughout college. After we both graduated college we got married. We were 23 and 24. We waited five years to have children, and spent that time learning to be married and enjoying living together. Now at 31/32, we have a beautiful 3 year old son and a 9 month old daughter. I just got finished putting the son to bed, and my wife is upstairs right now getting our daughter down to sleep. Life is very good!!!
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How We met I became very close friends with a guy in high school, we played tennis together. I started hanging out with his group of friends a lot, and one of his friends was a girl who I thought was just the most beautiful, kind, fun person in the whole world. I was 16 and she was 15.
How We Started Dating Our first kiss was literally on New Years Eve of Y2K at a gathering with all her friends. After that, I wanted to take her on a date. Her parents had a rule that she couldn't date until she was 16 in March. I called her parents and explained to her mother that her daughter had all of the qualities that I was looking for in a girl to date. I told her that I would understand and wait until she turned 16 if she wanted, but that I would like to take her on a date sooner. Her mom was apparently impressed, and agreed to let me take her on a date. I took her to Toy Story 2, and we were officially a couple after that!!!
The Breakup We basically were always perfect for each other. We enjoy each others company, have similar temperaments and personalities, and just have fun. We never argued or got into drama. However, near the end of my Freshman year of college, I broke up with her. Our relationship was going very well, but I figured that having dated since we were 15 and 16 years old, we hadn't had ANY other relationships. I told her that I wanted her to date someone else and try to find someone that she enjoyed being around more than me. I told her that I wanted to do the same. I told her that if either of us could find someone we liked more, then it's a good thing we broke up. And if not, then it's just as good, because we'll get back together and know that we really are meant to be together.
What I did After this, I figured, well, I better start dating girls right now!!! I asked several girls out on dates, but never got past a couple dates. I never wanted to because I would realize very quickly that the girl was not nearly as awesome as she was. I dated very smart, fun, attractive people, who on paper should be the type of people I'd want to be with, but nope...not as good...not even close!!!
What she did She got into a steady relationship with a guy and dated him for several months. She didn't like him as much as me (I didn't know this at the time), but dating me wasn't an option, and she did like him, so that was that.
And then what After about a year apart I asked her to have dinner with me. I told her I learned that no matter how awesome of a person I met, they weren't going to compare to her. I told her that she obviously had the right to stay in her current relationship with Shane (I think that was his name), but that I was not going to date anyone else, and that my new goal in life was to convince her to date me again and someday to marry me. Apparently that's what she wanted to hear. A week later she broke off her relationship and we resumed dating.
And Finally We continued to date throughout college. After we both graduated college we got married. We were 23 and 24. We waited five years to have children, and spent that time learning to be married and enjoying living together. Now at 31/32, we have a beautiful 3 year old son and a 9 month old daughter. I just got finished putting the son to bed, and my wife is upstairs right now getting our daughter down to sleep. Life is very good!!!
Great story aceyou!
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This is a great thread, I love all of the stories. For me, I met my wife at a bar/dance club. She actually secretly bought me a drink. I wasn't even supposed to be out that night, it was a last minute going away thing for a friend leaving town. This particular club has several bars, I had been in the dance area, but moved to a bar in the back to chat with my friends and have a beer. The bartender came over to deliver a fresh beer and I inquired about where it came from. She told me someone at the other end of the bar bought it for me. I caught a glimpse of my wife leaving the bar and heading back to the dance area. I was pretty sure I had seen her earlier. So now my friends were all eager to know who this was that bought me the beer. We went back to the dance area and I pointed out my wife, as I was pretty sure the beer came from her. She was on the dance floor with someone at the time. My friends kept telling me that I needed to cut in, but I'm actually very introverted until I get to know someone. So my friend actually dragged me onto the dance floor, no joke this happened. To avoid a scene I finally let go of the bar and went. My friend walked up to the person dancing with my wife and said may I cut in and pushed me towards my wife to dance with her. We danced for a bit and then went to another bar area to talk. My wife offered to buy me a beer to which I replied, I think you already did. We have been inseparable ever since. That was over 25 years ago September 15, 1990. We moved in together within a couple of months and I proposed on Christmas hoping for a 1 year engagement and getting married on New Year's Day 1992. We had trouble with the church and counseling sessions getting scheduled, so we weren't able to actually get married until February 29, 1992. Yes we got married on leap year, it's still funny to us. To answer the original question, I can't say exactly when I knew, but I knew very soon in the relationship that she was the one!
Yours is great too. It's funny that both our wives took the initiative. My wife was the one who actually came over and gave me the kiss...I was too shy at the time:)
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I can't yet confirm whether he is «the one», but we've been together almost 5 years now. I'm frankly not sure I'll ever get to the point of being sure, just the type of person I am. Regardless:
We met through mutual friends at a party - he was in college, I was older, but we had some friends in common. He was less than sober, and asked me «are you DTF» (half as a joke apparently... half serious). I said no, naturally. Apparently we'd met before very briefly but he hadn't made an impression on me, so I didn't remember.
Our mutual friend told him that he had no chance with me, because I was older, and not looking for a fling with a young player. Thus, he made it his mission to win me over.
He came to the climbing gym where I worked at the time and climbed with his buddy while trying to talk to me - I was working, and not interested. The next week was St-Patrick's day. We crossed paths again at a bar, we chatted for a while, and I realized he wasn't such an ass afterall. He asked for my number, I gave it, and the next night he asked me to watch a movie at his place. We've been together for 5 years now, and have lived together for the past 2. His sillyness and young soul balances my seriousness and gets me out of my comfort zone, which makes me a better person, and I adore him for it.
To this day though, I'm still saved in his phone as «Nat, climbing, big-boobs»... so you know, the romance is still alive.