These people ARE socially conservative: they want their kids to go to good schools, not do drugs, get married, and have 2.5 kids. They look down on people they see making poor life choices (which includes otherwise conservative hicks in trailer parks drinking themselves to death). They also might have a hesitation about cutting funding for some social services, and generally are not a fine of giant tax cuts for rich people, but that does not translate into an overall trust that Dems are good stewards of money.
I wasn't aware that there are culture war fights about wanting kids to go to good schools. The idea that conservatives see those values as belonging to them and not liberals is infuriating. Just about every liberal I know is on their original marriage, is a dedicated parent, values education, etc. And, btw, the states that score high on indicators of responsible parenting (high quality schools, low divorce rates, low out of wedlock and teen birth rates, higher age at first sexual experience) and all of those things you claim are socially conservative are blue states. It turns out those godless liberals in Massachusetts and Vermont have a few things to teach conservatives about "socially conservative" values.
To me, as one of those liberals living an exemplary socially conservative life, those aren't the flash points of the left/right culture wars, which largely center around abortion, gay marriage, access to birth control, religious freedom. And, it turns out that many socially conservative people have come around on legal weed, gay marriage, and birth control. There is quite a bit of common ground there.