I haven't been to the dentist in years

[frugal rph]

I've really neglected my teeth, and now I can see a cavity in one of them. I'm going to the dentist for the first time in 5 years on Friday.  I feel embarrassed about letting things get this bad.  I also don't want to lose a tooth, and there are probably more problems with my teeth that I don't even see.  And of course, I'm upset about spending a ton of money to fix a problem I could have prevented. Has anyone else returned to the dentist after a long time?

[ixtap]

20 some years, but I have good genes as far as teeth are concerned. I just required one extra visit to dig out the tartar.

I was sure they would need to do a million things. I had originally asked my husband to accompany me, but I bucked up at the last minute.

May your experience be as reasonable as mine!

[Linea_Norway]

I can only wish you good luck.

Even we who go to the dentist every year can sometimes have an expensive repair. So it is no guarantee.

[HappierAtHome]

I went almost ten years without a dentist visit. And unfortunately I have genetically bad teeth. So it was expensive, BUT the dentist was very compassionate and kind about it.

[A Definite Beta Guy]

Yup, this year actually. It was tremendously expensive and took a ton of time. I ended having a nasty case of gingivitis and a bunch of cavities. I don't know why my teeth in particular are so bad off, because my sister never has this problem. I'd guess due to my alcohol consumption....the more times you put food or drink in your mouth, the more chances you give for bacteria to attack your teeth, and the less time for your teeth to recover.

[GuitarStv]

Genes determine to a very great degree how your teeth will turn out.

I did a ten year hiatus from the dentist . . . mostly due to laziness.  I brush twice a day with a manual toothbrush, and floss a couple times a week.  I eat sugary fruit every few hours during most days.  No fillings, nothing wrong with my teeth.  Apparently I'm blessed with good tooth genes.

My wife also did a 10 year hiatus.  She is religious about brushing three times a day with a fancy motorized brush and flosses once or twice.  She doesn't snack on stuff during the day and avoids sugary foods as a general rule.  She had to have all sorts of work done (fillings, bridge, implant) when she went back.

[Ocinfo]

Yes, I’ve really only been to the dentist a few times but am planning to continue going more often now (poor as a kid and then just not interested as an early 30s adult). I’ve had 1 legit big cavity and 4-5 other small ones filled. I last went in the spring after 5 years. No cavities worth filling but did have a soft spot or two. I take decent care of my teeth but nothing special. I will be going to the dentist more often primarily to remove tarter more often as the last cleaning was a bit rough. Hygienist was ready for a mess of cavities after asking how long it had been and was surprised at what she didn’t find.


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[TheOldestYoungMan]

If it's been a really long time, I'd get at least two opinions, that is, make two appointments with two different dentists for an exam.  It doesn't cost that much, and you greatly reduce the chances that you end up getting unneccessary work done.

I had gone ten years without going to the dentist, and the first one told me I needed 22 fillings.  I couldn't believe it, there wasn't any pain or anything and my teeth looked fine, I went to a different dentist and he said he might do two but even those he'd only do because I hadn't been in so long he would worry they'd get worse before I came back.  After he did the work I told him about the first dentist's recommendation and he just shook his head.

Dentists have mortgages too it seems.

[MNBen]

If it's been a really long time, I'd get at least two opinions, that is, make two appointments with two different dentists for an exam.  It doesn't cost that much, and you greatly reduce the chances that you end up getting unneccessary work done.

I had gone ten years without going to the dentist, and the first one told me I needed 22 fillings.  I couldn't believe it, there wasn't any pain or anything and my teeth looked fine, I went to a different dentist and he said he might do two but even those he'd only do because I hadn't been in so long he would worry they'd get worse before I came back.  After he did the work I told him about the first dentist's recommendation and he just shook his head.

Dentists have mortgages too it seems.

Completely agree!  My wife had the same experience.   She went to a new dentist due to a change in health insurance and he took x-rays (because he could) and then recommended something like 8 cavities to be filled.   She never went back, went to a new dentist who said she had no cavities.  She didn't even tell him about the first dentist.  She's been fine every since.

[acroy]

yes I did the same. No issues though.... Good Luck!

Tip:
dentists are crooks. Sorry if I insulted any dentists here, but dammitt, what's the matter with your profession??
 Shop around. My poor DW was told 'Story 1' by dentist 1, involving cavities, root canals, etc, for $3k and 25% off if you 'Sign now!' Dentist 2 told 'Story 2' to the tune of 5k - on different teeth! It was like being bullshitted by hard-core used car salesmen. She was near tears.

Dentist 3, old established guy, said: 'you're fine. $75 for a clean'.

Moral:
Shop around, get 2nd, 3rd, 4th opinions....
Good luck!

[frugal rph]

Thank you for all the encouragement and advice.  Several different friends recommended the dentist I'm seeing on Friday, but I'll definitely get a second or even third opinion if what he recommends seems too outlandish.  Time is also an issue for me as a working solo parent, so I really hope it goes well with the first dentist.

[MasterStache]

Yes good luck to you. I probably went a good 10-15 years before seeing a dentist again. Mostly because I couldn't afford it and partly because I was lazy. Even with bad genes everything turned out fine and they were surprised my teeth were in as good of condition as they were in. Just had to do a deep cleaning. I brush and floss pretty rigorously though.

Never had a bad experience with any dentist trying to rip me off. In fact they have all been great, including my current one.   

[Chesleygirl]

I just returned to the dentist after 3 years of not seeing one.

I don't have cavities, but since most of my teeth are crowned, they really can't get cavities anyway. I have some gingivitis (bleeding gums) but the dental hygienist said that would improve after getting my teeth cleaned, and the tartar/plaque scraped away.

I saw a dentist for about 12 years who pressured me to get my wisdom teeth pulled, claimed they were going to rot out. Got huffy every time that I refused. I still have those teeth and plan to keep them. Eventually, they stopped calling me to come in every 6 months for a cleaning appointment. Probably because they knew they'd crowned most of my other teeth and I wouldn't get my wisdoms pulled. So they figured they couldn't make money off me anymore.

[A Definite Beta Guy]

Wisdom teeth are interesting. I still have mine, but almost every dentist I have seen wanted them taken out (especially the sideways impacted one). They wouldn't even want to do the work themselves, though, especially the sideways impacted.

The last guy wants me to look into braces. Several dentists have confirmed that I have had some planning on the right side of my mouth, which doesn't surprise me because that's where I do 90% of my chewing. My teeth are so out of whack that it's really the only effective bite plane I have.

[Chesleygirl]

Wisdom teeth are interesting. I still have mine, but almost every dentist I have seen wanted them taken out (especially the sideways impacted one). They wouldn't even want to do the work themselves, though, especially the sideways impacted.

Yes, they make a lot of money when they pull teeth.

If someone's wisdom teeth aren't bothering them, they don't need them pulled. Mine are what they call "impacted" but they don't bother me. I'm keeping them. Some dentists will even dismiss patients from their practice who refuse to get perfectly healthy teeth pulled.

[shawndoggy]

I'm a regular dentist visitor, but in the last year I've added a showerfloss to my daily toof care regimen.  At the last visit the cleaning was almost nothing, and both doc and hygenist said my gums and teeth looked great.  Can't sing the praises of the showerfloss enough.  $27, totally worth it.  If I were a dentist-once-a-decade person I would think a showerfloss would be indispensable.

[Linea_Norway]

My third wisdom tooth I wanted to remove myself, because it was laying flat and pushing my front corner tooth forward. It is still slightly forward, because I don't want to get a braces as an adult, and it is not that bad anyway.

I noticed that you Americans says they dentists call you twice a year. Here in Norway once a year is enough. Maybe you could reduce your visits to once a year. Although... I have once experienced that a dentist probably didn't interpret a cavity correctly and didn't repair it. A year later at another dentist, I needed a root canal treatment and false tooth in that position, because it had become that bad.

[shelivesthedream]

If you find a dentist you like, stick with them. I have always had crap teeth and I went to a great dentist until I moved away to another city in 2014. He was kind and always mentioned things like "We could pull this wisdom tooth at the back that's coming through a bit wonky, but if you're not having any actual problems with it then I wouldn't bother". Three years (and no dentistry) later, I come back to a different part of the same city and register with a new dentist. He thinks I need a filling and have gum disease and was kind of a jerk about it. (I really hate stuff being inside my mouth plus I'm pregnant and my gag reflex is maxed out and he didn't hide how annoying he found it. It's the little hoover that I hate the most, especially when it touches my tongue. Totally freaks me out.) He put a patch on the cavity and said to come back after I'd given birth and he'd do it properly. Lol, no. I'm planning to re-register with my old dentist and travel 45 minutes to see him because he doesn't make me feel like a terrible person.

[Bicycle_B]

I too have found a good dentist. 

Sorry if this is off topic from "haven't been to the dentist", but maybe it's on topic if finding a good dentist is relevant.  20 years ago, I asked who a good dentist in my neighborhood was.  She is still my dentist.  Regular cleanings, pleasant manners, clear explanations in the rare case of additional work; trained by one of USA's top 2 dental schools. Ask around.  There are good dentists.

OP, congratulations on moving forward.  Doing enough maintenance on your teeth to prevent future costs is wise. 

[simonsez]

This thread has me brushing my teeth a little extra today!

[Leisured]

Where do you all live? I heard that dentists learned the value of fluoride in drinking water when dentists moved to the west coast of the US in the nineteenth century. Business was slow, and someone guessed that drinking water running off the Rocky Mountains might have something to do with it. Fluoride is present in these waters, at about 1 ppm. Some areas of the Colorado have 1.5 ppm, naturally occurring, which led to a mottled appearance for the teeth of those living there. The teeth were fine, but looked bad.

Large areas of the world have well below 1 ppm fluoride in their drinking water, so in the twentieth century, some cities experimented with adding fluoride to municipal drinking water, with quick and impressive effect.

Nowadays, people can get fluoride from fluoride toothpaste. Or drink a lot of tea.

Surely there must be some dentists on this forum?

[horsepoor]

I haven't gone in about nine years.  I have a couple chipped front teeth though, so I really ought to go in and get patched up.  Other than that, my teeth look and feel fine.  I really got tired of the "you need to floss eleven times a day and get your teeth cleaned every two months or your teeth will fall out by next year" lecture.  I probably went to the dentist five times as a kid, and I have zero fillings.  I remember a baby tooth coming out with a cavity right through it, and one other soft spot when I was a teen that got scraped out and some enamel over the top, but otherwise, nope.

[Linea_Norway]

I haven't gone in about nine years.  I have a couple chipped front teeth though, so I really ought to go in and get patched up.  Other than that, my teeth look and feel fine.  I really got tired of the "you need to floss eleven times a day and get your teeth cleaned every two months or your teeth will fall out by next year" lecture.  I probably went to the dentist five times as a kid, and I have zero fillings.  I remember a baby tooth coming out with a cavity right through it, and one other soft spot when I was a teen that got scraped out and some enamel over the top, but otherwise, nope.

I hate flossing too and therefore I never did it. Every year at the dentist I was bleeding from my gums and soon as he touched them to remove tartar. Some years ago my dentist gave me a pack of very small gum brushes that I can stick between my gums. That has made a big difference. I use it twice a day after brushing and there often come out some additional breadcrumbs.
This is so much better then the flossing with a thread between tight teeth. I don't bleed from my gums anymore and hardly have any tartar now.

[shelivesthedream]

The discussion I dislike having is the electric toothbrush one. Had to have one as a child, hated it so much I always dodged brushing my teeth. How is that better than regular brushing with a manual?

[Kris]

The discussion I dislike having is the electric toothbrush one. Had to have one as a child, hated it so much I always dodged brushing my teeth. How is that better than regular brushing with a manual?

I’m curious why you hate it? I love mine.

[shelivesthedream]

The discussion I dislike having is the electric toothbrush one. Had to have one as a child, hated it so much I always dodged brushing my teeth. How is that better than regular brushing with a manual?

I’m curious why you hate it? I love mine.

It makes my nose vibrate intolerably. Plus the noise (minor issue).

[Rural]

The discussion I dislike having is the electric toothbrush one. Had to have one as a child, hated it so much I always dodged brushing my teeth. How is that better than regular brushing with a manual?

I’m curious why you hate it? I love mine.

It makes my nose vibrate intolerably. Plus the noise (minor issue).

Have you tried a children's spin brush (if such is available there?) I find there's much less vibration with the spinning motion. Plus I can have a Star Wars toothbrush. :)

[Johnez]

yes I did the same. No issues though.... Good Luck!

Tip:
dentists are crooks. Sorry if I insulted any dentists here, but dammitt, what's the matter with your profession??
 Shop around. My poor DW was told 'Story 1' by dentist 1, involving cavities, root canals, etc, for $3k and 25% off if you 'Sign now!' Dentist 2 told 'Story 2' to the tune of 5k - on different teeth! It was like being bullshitted by hard-core used car salesmen. She was near tears.

Dentist 3, old established guy, said: 'you're fine. $75 for a clean'.

Moral:
Shop around, get 2nd, 3rd, 4th opinions....
Good luck!

Not to throw water on your story, but how do you know your wife's teeth are actually fine? How do you know the last dentist wasn't just ready to hit the golf course and wanted to get the hell out?

[A Definite Beta Guy]

You'll find out when any unfilled cavities become root canals, I s'pose!

[snapperdude]

The discussion I dislike having is the electric toothbrush one. Had to have one as a child, hated it so much I always dodged brushing my teeth. How is that better than regular brushing with a manual?

I’m curious why you hate it? I love mine.

It makes my nose vibrate intolerably. Plus the noise (minor issue).

It goes in your mouth. You know that, right?

[katscratch]

I had my teeth cleaned and polished twice yearly but hadn't actually gone to a dentist in years until last year after cracking a tooth. I researched quite a bit - mostly wanting to not waste my time if the hygienist or dentist was going to make comments about how long it had been, because I would walk out and have to start all over. I also wanted to ensure whoever I saw was a little more conservative and didn't jump straight to invasive treatments. (I definitely do NOT think most dentists are out for money; I think they tend to do what they learned in school as best practice). Found a lot of great reviews on NextDoor and made an appointment.

And now I absolutely LOVE my dentist and hygienist. They both have a very common sense approach. I used to have tiny micro cavities in my incisors, which a former dentist had recommended addressing through something invasive that I totally don't remember because it was a zillion years ago - but my new dentist said to use a fluoride and potassium nitrate toothpaste to help plug up and remineralize the spots. Sure enough, a year later and those teeth have hardly any pitting on X-ray and aren't sensitive to cold anymore.

It sounds like you have a good recommendation. And maybe you will need a lot of work - but it's better to do it now than have major bone issues and lose teeth a few years from now!

[Pyrmont]

As a dentist (not US based) this thread is very interesting, if a little disheartening. There is a lot to comment on but some main points :
- an exam without x-rays is not the same as one with x-rays. X-rays give far more information. If a dentist is seeing your teeth for the first time and hasn't had access to x-rays he/she is guessing if they say you have no cavities (assuming a full or close to full dentition)
- cavities/caries do not always cause pain. A tooth can be decayed and unsaveable but not causing pain. The problem is ,it will at some stage. Murphys law means it will probably be Christmas Day or some other similar inconvenient time.
- crowned teeth can still become carious. Its not that uncommon. Also any man made object whether it be a ferrari or a crown , can and will deteriorate over time
- long periods without seeing a dentist are not the end of the world. You may need some work but if you've had reasonable oral hygiene and reasonable diet theres a good chance you'll be ok
- Personally I couldn't care less whether you use a manual or electric brush - if used properly, both work. Cleaning between your teeth eg. Floss/piksters etc is important but most people don't do it unfortunately
- there is a lot of evidence to show diet is far more important than genetics for the state of your teeth.
- dentistry for most dentists is a business and yes they have mortgages etc. Dentists do have consciences though and most care about their patients and want to do the right thing by them. It also helps business if you have a good reputation/profile so the vast majority try to do an honest days work
- yes suction (hoover) sucks (if you excuse the pun) and yes it's not nice having a load of instruments in your mouth but such is life. Read up on dentistry even 50 years ago and be grateful for the ongoing improvements
- wisdom teeth is very much situation/context dependent. Impacted wisdom teeth can be food traps/can cause cavities in adjacent teeth and can cause pericornitis (inflammation of gingiva). They don't cause crowding of your teeth. ---Asymptomatic wisdom teeth don't necessarily need to be extracted but the older a patient gets, the harder they can be to extract. It can be a judgement call
- for wisdom teeth and other dental treatment by all means get second or third opinions. I often encourage my patients to do so. The important thing to remember is dentists can have different opinions/treatment plans and both can be honest/right. Often these things can be judgements and depend on context etc.
- I understand price can be very important but if I was picking a dentist I'd go on word of mouth as much as possible

[shelivesthedream]

Thanks for the perspective, Pyrmont. Just to clarify on my earlier post, I can totally accept that I might have a cavity and gum disease, but there was no need for my (now ex!) dentist to be a jerk about it. I am planning to go back to my first dentist post-baby to have him do the treatment because he is so nice and won't make me feel like a terrible person, not because I think he'll tell me there's nothing wrong with my teeth.

And weirdly, I am relatively fine with many dentistry tools. The little mirror, the little pick thing... Don't love it, but I understand they have a purpose and I can usually suck it up. But suction (as I now know the little Hoover is called!) is just so so awful. I don't know what it is, but I would prefer to be drills than suctioned.

[Pyrmont]

Fair enough.  Hope I didn't sound too cranky. No reason you have to put up with a jerk. Dentistry is as much about the personal relationship as it is about skills etc. If you struggle with the suction, then make sure you say it to the dentist. They not be able to get rid of it completely but they may be able to limit it etc or at least be more understanding during the procedure.  One thing that more patients should do/dentists should encourage,  is wearing headphones listening to music etc during a procedure. Its a great distraction.

[evensjw]

I went back to the dentist after 10+ years after an old filling fell out (and half the tooth with it).  I ended up needing a lot of work done.  My insurance had a fairly small annual maximum, which the one root canal pretty much wiped out, but luckily it was almost the end of the year.  After that the dentist was very good about prioritizing the remaining work over the next couple of years so I wasn't paying completely out of pocket for anything. Some things can be delayed, within reason.

[Imma]

Fair enough.  Hope I didn't sound too cranky. No reason you have to put up with a jerk. Dentistry is as much about the personal relationship as it is about skills etc. If you struggle with the suction, then make sure you say it to the dentist. They not be able to get rid of it completely but they may be able to limit it etc or at least be more understanding during the procedure.  One thing that more patients should do/dentists should encourage,  is wearing headphones listening to music etc during a procedure. Its a great distraction.

I have a really great dentist. He's super friendly and he adapts the way he works to suit the needs of his patients. I'm not afraid of the dentist at all, but as I have a history of domestic violence, I really don't like lying back in a vulnerable position and have all these unexpected movements around my face. I told him and now he tells me exactly what he's doing all the time and I'm completely relaxed now.

I am a bit concerned about his skills though, so I guess I'm going to ask for a second opinion somewhere else. I don't often need work done, but last year I had a cavity and the filling fell out within 3 months. The dentist acted really surprised, saying he had never had that happen before, but I know for a fact that a friend of mine who also goes there had the same thing happening only a few months earlier. Brand new fillings falling out doesn't sound like a normal thing to happen and it seems he isn't honest about it either.

[Pyrmont]

Hard to know tbh. Depends on the condition of the tooth, the type of filing,  the bite etc. It could be bad luck, it could be poor workmanship,  a combination of the 2 etc. Has any of his previous work on you failed?/failed that quickly?

With your friends situation, she could be spot on but patients do mis-remember from time to time (as indeed do dentists). Your dentist could be dishonest, he could also be forgetfull, he could also just have a bit of pride like all of us . Your filling may have been perfect, on an otherwise sound tooth with an easy bite and your friends filling could have been the exact opposite hence he may not have associated the 2 events. Obviously I'm guessing here but often most things in life are grey areas rather than black and white.

I dont want to sound like im overly defensive though either. There is a wide variation in dentists ability as in every walk of life and if you're concerned then second opinions may be worthwhile. Every dentist will have mishaps - its how they deal with it that is often the makings of a good dentist-patient relationship.

Its not unheard of for fillings to fail early on. It could be bad luck, misjudged bite etc. Its a concern if its a regular event though

[expatartist]

Best of luck on your visit, OP.

Some great advice here, thanks to all. Will pick up the Showerfloss next year during a US trip!

[Imma]

Thanks for your reply! I imagine it's not easy to come out as a dentist, birthday parties must be hell too ;-) . It's hard to judge because I have good teeth and I never have had any other work done by him. I only have one other filling back from when I was a kid.

I'm not completely happy with the admin side of things in that practice either, but going for a second opinion can be risky too. My brother had one painful tooth that his own dentist couldn't fix, he went to see another one and suddenly he needed 7 fillings ... how on earth do you decide what to do in that case? I think many people have these experiences and that's why they don't trust dentists. I'm sure most dentists are ethical professionals, but for a layperson it's just so hard to judge their work.

[2Birds1Stone]

10 + years.

I caved when I cracked a bicuspid tooth on a bone in a meatball.

Ended up needing a root canal to save that tooth, and had 4 other small cavities.

It also took 4-5 cleanings to catch up and remove the plaque that built over that decade.

Overall my dentist says my teeth now are in fantastic shape. This was about 4 years ago and I go every 6 months now with no new cavities or problems.

Oh, I love my new dentist, the reason for the hiatus was terrifying dental work as a kid in a developing country which scared me for life.

[Pyrmont]

Thanks for your reply! I imagine it's not easy to come out as a dentist, birthday parties must be hell too ;-) . It's hard to judge because I have good teeth and I never have had any other work done by him. I only have one other filling back from when I was a kid.

I'm not completely happy with the admin side of things in that practice either, but going for a second opinion can be risky too. My brother had one painful tooth that his own dentist couldn't fix, he went to see another one and suddenly he needed 7 fillings ... how on earth do you decide what to do in that case? I think many people have these experiences and that's why they don't trust dentists. I'm sure most dentists are ethical professionals, but for a layperson it's just so hard to judge their work.

Ya thats fair enough. At a certain level/point, it just comes down to trust unfortunately.  I know I find it difficult with new patients, when I have to tell them they need a load of work that they aren't expecting and I've probably lost patients on occasion because of that even though I was being honest.

It sounds like your teeth are pretty ok going on the limited work you've had done. I suppose things to look for are - does the dentist explain where/why the work is needed? Can they demonstrate the issues on an xray or intra-oral photo? (That isnt always possible tbf but usually is). Are they pushy? I tell patients what I think is wrong and the options for fixing it - I try not to panic/frighten them ?(unless there is an abcess /swelling present - which can be serious). Do they go thru all the options eg an extraction is always an alternative to a root treatment, and do they explain the benefits/negatives/risks of treatment? Do they discuss the option of doing nothing and associated risks/benefits? Do they only offer the expensive option - do they give reasons for not offering cheaper options? Id always offer a denture or plate for a missing tooth as well as an implant - the vast majority of times the patient will go for the implant (assuming cost not an issue) but at least they've been able to make an informed decision.

It sounds like your almost happy at your current dentist but not quite. Would it be worth discussing these issues with him? He may have valid reasons for the failed filling or he may be able to say "I stuffed up" and acknowledge his failings? He may not know anything about the admin issues or it could be a catalyst for change.

As soon as people hear I'm a dentist they either cover their teeth or they put a finger in their mouth to point out some issue !

[iris lily]

20 some years, but I have good genes as far as teeth are concerned. I just required one extra visit to dig out the tartar.

I was sure they would need to do a million things. I had originally asked my husband to accompany me, but I bucked up at the last minute.

May your experience be as reasonable as mine!

Agreed, I didnt go to the dentist for ten years and when I finally did, All was fine. In the early years they hovered over me to lecture about  cleaning, flossings, water picking and yes it is true my gums are not good, but here I am at 63years old with all of my teeth and no natural cavities. i have a filling from a bike accident when I was a kid and that filling is 52 years old. Since dental staff have seen no change in many Years,  they aren't much interested in lectures.

I now get my teeth cleaned 2X annually.

I thank my parents for passing on good genes for teeth. My care of them is mediocre, my nutrition is good, though. I am old enough that sugery drinks were not ubiquitous in our childhood. I also thank my parents for training us that water is what we drink, nothing  else is necessary.

Also, I completely LOVE my dentist. He is politically active, he is a firearms trainer, and he is famous for chasing a shooter down the street of our little neighborhood back when his first office was here. He is Action Man personified.  All of those years when
I avoided d the dentist I was sad to not be able to see him. dH and my friends all go to him.