I'd like to comment about whether relationships take "work":
I think it's reasonable to expect some work. When I met my gf it was all easy. When we moved in together it took a little "work" to figure out some things, like standards of cleanliness/neatness, how to divide expenses and house chores, etc. It didn't take long to figure out these things in a way that makes us both happy, and it has been smooth sailing since. The work was definitely worth it for us. I think if I expected a relationship to take zero work, I would be single forever, haha.
So my opinion is it's fine to "work" on some issues if it resolves them. I wouldn't worry about being incompatible unless the same issues keep coming up.
