Coming to terms with not being defined by a career...is not easy. My kids are going into 5th and 2nd grade...and I think I've finally come to terms with the fact that I don't want a career. I want to be at home....helping at school....bumming around summer with my kids.
During the last 10 years, I have felt like there is something wrong with me because I don't have a strong desire to have a thriving career. Even more so because pre-kids I had a great career and good income.....and I'm educated. I pick up some part-time stuff mainly for fun here and there. I definitely have struggled with feeling undervalued in society because I am not generating an income and have lost a lot of my former potential career-wise. But why do I feel that way? I am SO happy! My husband is happy! My kids are thriving. I know that if I was working full-time, I would be miserable...missing out on our time after school, our time during the summer and school breaks. My older son is outta here in 8 years. That will be here in the blink of an eye! The older they get too.....the less I desire to work.
Anyway, glad you made your decision for now. You will not regret it!
Yes, I struggle with this too, and I work full time. I very much worked hard and was proud of my career for a long time. Then I hit the wall (or the glass ceiling, so to speak).
It only took one bad boss to really eff it up. Add a couple of layoffs at work, and you end up with a career going nowhere. I decided over the space of a couple of years that I had to get over it. My career is going nowhere due to the state of the company and that one bad boss (who is gone, thankfully).
So now I have a job. And I'm not sure how much I *want* the job. I used to put so much into it, and for what? The last 4 years have been a big joke. I want to be able to go on field trips. To leave early for baseball games and practice. To volunteer at the school.
On top of that, I have a few friends who either: 1. don't work, 2. are self-employed, 3. are employed part time. The last few years, I've seen them (different friends)
- move to Spain for the summer with the kids, and work remotely
- take 3 months off to drive cross country in the camper, hitting all the National Parks
- spend days at the pool, or the beach, or out camping
- take a month long road trip
- work remotely from Italy.
And I wonder, WTF have I been doing wrong? I wonder if I can do that. It's hard to make the transition from full time employee. I don't particularly want to be self employed, and my company won't let me work PT. But...can I pull off a month long trip to visit family, working remotely? I suppose I'd feel different if I felt valued at work. But at this point, they've laid so many people off I'm just the worker bee. They try to get as much out of me as possible. I don't enjoy full time work in this environment.
There was a period of time when I thought about quitting (that bad boss again). I occasionally think about it still. Some coworkers suggest that it would be hard to find another job (true). I point out that I don't really *need* the job (husband is employed). But I think that even though I'm talking to pretty frugal coworkers, they don't quite realize the depth of my frugality.
Truth is there are parts about my job that I enjoy. I just would enjoy it more if I could do it less. I get positive feedback from my family. I'm not getting it at work. (My kids are 10 and 3).