Author Topic: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults  (Read 20539 times)

MayDay

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College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« on: December 22, 2023, 08:54:57 AM »
Warning:  long and rambly.  My key questions are:
-Has anyone navigated the college process with an autistic kid?  How did it go?  What did it look like for you?
-Any specific advice for us, both in terms of schools and the financial side?

My high school sophomore is autistic.  He is academically strong in his areas of interest and will major in computer science, computer engineering, or electrical engineering most likely, or possibly another type of engineering/etc.  We live in MN. 

We had always planned to pay in state tuition kind of money towards our kids' undergrad.  We can cash flow that or pay it out of savings no problem. 

But the closer we get, the more apparent it is that DS will need some or all of the following:  small class sizes, professors who will take the time to get to know him, academic supports, supports for executive functioning, etc.  He may need support for tasks of daily living. 

Additionally, although he has very high grades in subjects that interest him (engineering, math, and physics so far) he has poor grades in other subjects (art, English).  And finally our income is quite high so I am starting to think we will be paying full sticker price and that he will not get any scholarships.  He may have trouble getting into schools that expect good essays for example (IDK what the landscape for that even is- I only applied for state schools and didn't have to write any essays for admission, just for scholarships).

Our "we'll pay in state tuition" plan was based on assuming our kids would be successful at whatever big state school we lived near, which was true for H and I.   Now we are feeling like we need a plan BD. , C, or D I think he might be successful at the University of St Thomas, for example- it is small, has engineering majors he is interested in, and is 20 minutes from our house so parents can provide some of the support he needs.  And it costs 63K a year to attend, ouch.  Or, maybe he could attend the Univ of MN Duluth- two hours away and a much smaller public school- but they don't have computer engineering which is currently his top interest.  Its 26K.  Much better.

But what if he needs more support than the typical undergrad experience?  Living at home and going to CC is fine, but he will have already maxed out CC math after his junior year of high school and will be ready for engineering classes pretty much right away.  H and I are engineers and we definitely wouldn't have been able to finish in 4 years if we started at a CC, due to the course orders, and I believe that is still true. I am not in a rush for DS to finish in 4 years, but it won't do him any good to sit in CC classes he hates because he already took the math and science ones.


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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #1 on: December 22, 2023, 10:12:42 AM »
One of my good friends from undergrad is autistic and has some form of anxiety disorder as well. We were doing music school, so our work was very different from normal academic subjects, but it was a music school at a small liberal arts college and that environment seemed good for him. He had especially supportive relationships with a handful of professors who helped him a lot. He finished on time in 4 years, and basically completed a minor in computer science, though didn’t actually get it on a technicality.

While he wasn’t especially social in the music school, we were both part of a coop organization that did him a lot of good. One year we both had leadership positions in the organization, and while the additional work was stressful, but it was a great bonding experience between us and other coop leadership people. He told me he was on the verge of taking a leave of absence spring semester of that year and just not coming back from winter break, but the coop work was what got him to come back.

Hope something from that is helpful. I don’t know if I have any actionable insights, but I’ll say the liberal arts college thing is good not just because of the small college/small town vibes being very manageable, but also that liberal arts colleges tend to attract a more quirky/weird student body, where it’s so much easier for people who are different to feel like they finally belong somewhere. Many of those kinds of liberal arts colleges only offer engineering in conjunction with another university (3-2 programs), though computer science should be available anywhere.

getsorted

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #2 on: December 22, 2023, 10:15:34 AM »
I'm basing these thoughts on my own experience as a neurodivergent person who went through a small public college without a diagnosis. In retrospect-- my college friend group was just a basket of ADHD & autistic kids who were struggling through; many of us have been diagnosed as adults. My son is diagnosed with ADHD and likely will eventually get an ASD diagnosis, but he's only 10.

I wouldn't bank on a smaller university necessarily having better supports in place than a larger one. At smaller schools, you're generally depending on the teaching faculty to provide more attention and direction, but it's not a given that they will do so. Larger universities tend to have an office that oversees accommodations-- sometimes through counseling centers, tutoring centers, the disability office, or sometimes even diversity offices-- depends on the school. I would do some digging into exactly what kind of support might be available. For example, a friend realized midway through grad school that she met all the criteria for dyslexia, got tested through the university, and was then eligible to take tests orally, allowed to record lectures, etc. I can't predict what kind of support your son would need, but I have seen time management groups, tutoring groups, writing tutors, etc. on college campuses.

I would also recommend that you look into coaching over the next two years (or more) to improve his ability to function independently in a college environment. There are psychologists, counselors, and educators who work online or in person to help ND people improve their executive functioning or social functioning. People who are neurotypical tend to downplay the role of explicit instruction in soft skills. Time management course? Just read a book or something! Social skills course? What kind of loser needs those? But for some of us, deliberately strengthening those unseen skills that many people take for granted can be a game-changer.

For executive function, I always recommend the "Smart but Scattered" books & resources, which aren't specific to ADHD but breaks down executive function into many different components (time management, emotional regulation, planning, etc) and has a lot of practical tips for developing systems of self-support.

Finally-- how lucky is your son that you're looking ahead this way and prepared to meet him where he is with supports!

secondcor521

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #3 on: December 22, 2023, 10:18:42 AM »
Not anywhere near an expert.

"Autistic" is a very very broad term.

A friend's son is autistic.  He is non-verbal, occasionally physically combative, has Down's syndrome also.  He will never go to college.

My nephew has Asperger's.  That's technically autistic.  He has a slight lisp, a slightly odd gait, and has difficulty reading emotions.  He graduated with a degree in statistics from an Ivy League school and has a master's degree in statistics from a highly regarded university.

The comments below might be reasonable or unreasonable depending on where your son fits on the spectrum.

Most universities now have "differently abled offices" where they have support staff to help provide various accommodations to students who need them.  These vary in quality and in what they're named.  I'd suggest meeting with these offices when you go on college visits.  In the case of my youngest, I was surprised by the variety and breadth of ideas and offerings for them to deal with their misophonia.  The school came up with half a dozen ideas and options that my miso kid didn't even realize were possible and they were delighted with the support.

You can start now working with him to advocate for himself and work on developing his independence.

With any college kid, how far away from home is a pretty big factor in my experience.  Sounds like you want to focus within one direct short plane flight or a couple hour drive from home or closer.  The closer they are, the more feasible support from home is.  It may not be necessary, but it's nice to have in the arsenal.

I'd start trying to collect input from resources around your student who know him and know autism and know college.  The accommodations that might be most helpful might only partially overlap with the accommodations you think would be most helpful.  High school guidance counselors, any medical professionals (his pediatrician?), the "differently abled office" resources.  Maybe there are some books on the subject?

For ideas on schools, you might try Big Future, which is the College Board's college search tool.  I used it and liked it for my three kids when they were looking.  My middle son was looking for schools similar to your son; some options on his list that might also be worth looking into for your son would be:

1.  Rose-Hulman Institute (IN).  Hard to get into, but small and very engineering focused.  Maybe too far away.
2.  Case Western Reserve (OH).  Hard to get into, but has good engineering.  Has a broader array of degrees.  Maybe to far away.
3.  Dordt College (IA).  Small.  Religious.
4.  Kettering (MI).  Expensive.
5.  SD School of Mines (SD).  Commuter campus.  Cheap.  Good reputation.  Cold winters.  Apparently not much to do.
6.  Calvin College (MI).  Religious.
7.  Michigan Tech (MI).  On Lake Superior, so I assume very cold.
8.  U MN Duluth was also on my kids' list.

All of these are in your general area, have good S:F ratios, have engineering of some kind (my kid was looking at mechanical, electrical, and chemical).  So they might at least bear looking at online.

I'm giving you a broader number of schools because I think it is good to start broad so that when you apply your criteria, you'll still end up with several schools to apply to.  My son's process started with 54 schools that were in the ball park, narrowed to 20 just based on Big Future, visited 7, applied to three, got into one.

Nowadays you can get a lot of feel for a school online, but visits are very very good if you can at all do them.

With enough effort, you might find a school that is a very good fit.  My son got his IB diploma.  Most schools didn't really know much about the IB program, but one did.  They had an IB applicant coordinator who we met on our campus visit, who asked about his IB stuff - senior project, etc.  His application fee was waived because he was an IB candidate, and he was awarded a decent scholarship for being an IB graduate.  He also got a nice academic scholarship there.  So in addition to that being the only school that accepted him, it was actually a very good fit.

You'll know a good fit if/when you find it.  It'll either be the feel when he's on campus, or the financial aid / scholarship offer compared to other similar schools will be unusually good.

Specifically on the engineering stuff, I heartily agree with you that CC is not a good path.  Yes, it can be done, but it probably doesn't save any time or money overall for reasons you've alluded to.

He might want to look at mechanical engineering too.  It's a very broad and very marketable degree.  Very difficult to get through, though.  Out of three very intelligent and capable people in my family who considered it or tried it, none of them succeeded.  But obviously some students do it.

Financial stuff:

Your son might be able to get a National Merit scholarship.  It's too late for him to take the PSAT as a sophomore, but you might have him take several practice tests between now and next fall.  If he takes the PSAT and scores in the 99% plus range, he might make it into that program.  There are a few subsequent steps, but the junior year PSAT score is quite frankly the hardest; after that it's pretty easy.  If he gets to be a National Merit Finalist or even Semifinalist, many schools will offer automatic scholarships, all the way up to full tuition for four years.  (I have four NM Semifinalists or above in my family, including two NM Scholars which is the top final tier.)

Look for scholarships that are specific to engineering and even specific to autistic students.  They're probably out there, and your son will have a much better shot at getting those than the broad, national, open-to-everyone scholarships.  Have him continue to look at the university he attends - that's even narrower and his chances are even higher.

Scholarship essays are usually not the biggest part of getting scholarships.  Usually it's test scores, financials/FAFSA, degree path, grades.  And if an essay is required, in most cases he can and should have it read by others before submittal for grammar, spelling, content, etc.  English teachers at his high school are good resources for this.  Make him do the writing and correcting and editing part, but I think liberal feedback in multiple rounds of review is perfectly fair.  Unless for some odd reason the scholarship application rules state otherwise - something I've never seen.

If you're close to FIRE, you might be able to FIRE and have a low taxable income, which opens doors to FAFSA financial aid and FAFSA-based scholarships.  I FIREd when my younger two were in high school and this strategy helped them.

Happy to answer questions here or in PM on any of the above.

HTH.  Good luck.
« Last Edit: December 22, 2023, 10:26:04 AM by secondcor521 »

srrb

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #4 on: December 22, 2023, 10:24:02 AM »
Yes -- but from a Canadian perspective. For us there have been two parts to this situation: "doing" college and independent living. For our child, independent living was most important to them and they were making poor choices trying to establish that want. That's a whole other story that I won't go into, as it seems you are assuming your child will still live at home while going to post-secondary.

Like you son, our kid does very, very well in what they want to do, and often not so well in other (required) things. However, we've found with general maturity and overall buy-in to the program they've chosen, they do okay in the related electives. They go to a small college geared towards working adults. What that means is part-time program delivery, online/hybrid/F2F options, 3-hr once-a-week classes instead of M/W/F, no social/party scene etc. They also have an academic accommodation plan, organized through the school's disability services. They complete 3 courses a semester and go to school all year. School is their "job", along with looking after themselves in their little apartment. It took a couple of tries to find the right school and major. They also receive a fair bit of funding because of the autism, so this doesn't cost us much. Although they have career plans, I expect this is their life for the next 7-10 years.

Despite having been labeled "high functioning" in the past, their day-to-day has to be just-so to cope and not spiral into self-harm and substance use. I wish I had understood more about THAT and the extent of their masking when they were a teenager. "High-functioning", "Mild", "Aspergers" autism terms were comforting but misleading descriptions that supported ignorance on our part as parents to successfully support our kid. I'll suppress the rant here, but happy to talk privately about this controversial issue.

Feel free to PM if want to talk through more details or have questions.

Smokystache

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #5 on: December 22, 2023, 07:09:09 PM »
Replying as a former professor who had students like your son in my classes. I have experience teaching small classes at 2 large public state universities (Think "University of [State Name]" and ["State Name] State University) and then as a long-time professor at a small private liberal arts college [SLAC] with about 1,100 undergraduates and very few graduate students (<100). My SLAC was known for doing a great job with neurodivergent students. We had an office dedicated to students with learning challenges and accommodations. Furthermore, there wasn't a class on campus that had more that 45 students in it with a median of 16 students/class. Perhaps most importantly, all the classes are taught by faculty (not graduate students) who want to focus on teaching, not research. In my personal experience, SLACs are often much more likely to take a personal interest in their students. If a student missed two classes in a row, I'm emailing them to see what is up. And many of my colleagues are the same. I doubt that is happening at the institution with enormous 35,000 students and class sizes of ~350 students down the road.

Minnesota has a large number of small, public colleges/universities and I'm assuming some of them will also do a great job with your son. I'd begin reaching out to their admissions offices and specifically ask if you can come take a tour and also have a meeting with someone in the office of accommodations/learning challenges.

The big limitation of public and private SLACs is their range of programs. We simply were not large enough to offer Engineering (but did have Comp Sci). So some majors simply won't be offered. As someone else may have mentioned, you always have to look at the "net price" for college. My institution now has a list price of just shy of $40,000/year ... but literally every student who was admitted automatically received a minimum $15,000 scholarship (all the way up to full-ride). For example, this website (using federal data) shows that the average student at the Univ of St. Thomas actually had a net cost of $28,000/year.  https://www.tuitiontracker.org/school.html?v=7052&unitid=174914

Best of luck. Great job thinking about this early so you have time to gather info!

MayDay

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #6 on: December 23, 2023, 08:04:12 AM »
@srrb you are hitting on a lot of where my concerns sit. DS has low tp nonexistent academic support needs for things he is interested in, but very high support needs for other things. English projects, managing to get put the door in the morning, putting his acne medicine on, flossing his teeth- these things currently need significant parental support. We currently have to manage his time as if he were a much younger child because he will indefinitely avoid things that are unpleasant or overwhelming.

I like how you described interest in independent living vs college/job. I will talk to DS about it through that lens. I strongly suspect he will be happy to live at home forever..... But we are starting to spin things we disagree on (like Christmas lights or the AC in the car- little stuff) as "great news, you can move out someday and do it your way!" Or "once you get your driver's license you can drive without using the car and put the heat on as high as you like!" Or whatever.  Trying to plant seeds that moving out has positives haha.

srrb

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #7 on: December 23, 2023, 10:13:23 AM »
@srrb you are hitting on a lot of where my concerns sit. DS has low tp nonexistent academic support needs for things he is interested in, but very high support needs for other things. English projects, managing to get put the door in the morning, putting his acne medicine on, flossing his teeth- these things currently need significant parental support. We currently have to manage his time as if he were a much younger child because he will indefinitely avoid things that are unpleasant or overwhelming.

I like how you described interest in independent living vs college/job. I will talk to DS about it through that lens. I strongly suspect he will be happy to live at home forever..... But we are starting to spin things we disagree on (like Christmas lights or the AC in the car- little stuff) as "great news, you can move out someday and do it your way!" Or "once you get your driver's license you can drive without using the car and put the heat on as high as you like!" Or whatever.  Trying to plant seeds that moving out has positives haha.
Although, IMO, they moved out too early, in the end, it was the right decision. An excellent lesson for us to see past the disability and neurodivergency and really listen to the person who is an expert in their own life. In one way, it takes more spoons, but in another way, they do more with each spoon because their life is totally under their control. We see them more often, the harmful and destructive life choices have (mostly) stopped, and my/DH's home and relationship is better.

They started uni after highschool while still living at home, but didn't last long. They needed to sort out other things first -- which is a common experience -- for young adults, but it felt wrapped up with all the other challenges.  I'm quite involved in helping them manage school outside of actually doing the school work (course registration, student aid applications, setting up exams in the testing centre, monitoring email inbox, etc.). Current state of affairs is they are doing excellently and are willingly spending a few days at home over Christmas fully engaged with all the other family and guests.

I guess my advice would be (as you are planning), to really talk to them and get below the "mask". People with autism can be very good at people-pleasing when they want to be and will tell you what you want to hear. They also can be accustomed to being directed because of therapies and such they've experienced for "their own good", so will go along while silently simmering and being traumatized. It's tough, but sounds like you're on the right path.

AMandM

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #8 on: December 23, 2023, 02:47:29 PM »
Before you rule out the big public school, talk to their disability support services office. They may have more supports available than you imagine, because the larger the student body the more likely that a given need is common enough to warrant devising and funding institutional supports. A large school, for instance, is more likely to have a dorm geared towards neurodivergent students.

For a specific recommendation, I have friends whose daughter is going to Landmark College, a college designed specifically for students with ASD, ADHD, and learning disabilities. On the downside, it`s in Vermont, so a long ways from home, and while it offers a CS degree, it doesn`t have engineering.


BZB

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #9 on: December 24, 2023, 04:42:38 PM »
I know someone whose college aged kid with autism is attending Texas Tech. They have a program specifically for students with autism. I hear from his parents that it's going fairly well. https://www.depts.ttu.edu/burkhartcenter/case/

partgypsy

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #10 on: January 03, 2024, 01:09:55 PM »
My dd is also neurodivergent, but almost opposite issues (high empathy, but severe dyslexia, dyscalclia). She is a self starter and organized. Bc of her work ethic is on the honor roll. But academic skills and test taking, not sure if she will get in, anywhere.  She wants to go to college for art. I think we need to talk to an advisor or counselor at her school to figure where to go with this. As there were many years I did not think she would graduate HS let alone anything further, still wrapping my brain around this. We do not have much money saved for college and will not be able to cash flow, so that is another consideration. Def community college for first year, maybe 2.
« Last Edit: January 03, 2024, 01:14:26 PM by partgypsy »

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2024, 04:51:27 PM »
This thread has been really helpful! Ordered the Smart but scattered book. Made a note to find all the disability centers of each potential college DS could go to.
Amusingly enough DS is looking for computer engineering too (I have a feeling this major is overwhelmingly ASD). He has many of the initiation, organization, interest issues listed here by others. I'm really praying for a successful college experience for him.

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2024, 05:05:38 PM »
I imagine that an online parenting group would be a great resource for comparing experiences with the accommodations office. I had a friend who taught at a small liberal arts college that offered all testing in a center. It wasn't a part of classroom time and professors never had to haggle with students over their excuses. This was amazing for neurodivergent students?

EverythingisNew

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #13 on: January 10, 2024, 06:19:37 PM »
One of my sons has ASD and after learning about his diagnosis I also think I have ASD. College was very hard for me and not because of academics, but because it was very difficult for me to manage my time. I went to a huge prestigious state university. Some things that helped me: my sister went to the same university! Having a family member who “looked out” for me really helped. I also liked the anonymity of the big university. I could go to class without people noticing me. The school was only 3 hrs to my home, which also helped because I couldn’t plan in advance for getting myself home. With my son, I will have him pick a school that is less than 4hrs away. I think he needs to be close by. Otherwise he can pick the school he wants!

roomtempmayo

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #14 on: January 12, 2024, 08:23:37 PM »
Additionally, although he has very high grades in subjects that interest him (engineering, math, and physics so far) he has poor grades in other subjects (art, English). 

It's also worth keeping in mind that the core curriculum varies significantly across the schools you're considering.

St. Thomas is a liberal arts college that's added business and engineering schools along with all sorts of graduate programs, but the liberal arts are still the center.  Not only does that mean more reading and writing classes for everyone, it means everyone has to take philosophy and theology.  The engineering school also heavily overlaps with the Air Force ROTC program and influences the engineering culture, which may or may not work for your child.

UMD is a branch campus of a land grant state university.  The general education requirements are much thinner, and there are no philosophy or theology requirements for engineering students.  Any sort of engineering at UMD is going to be more narrowly focused than at UST.

Thinking about the ways you want your child to be challenged, as well as the ways in which they are likely to succeed, may be useful as you think about a good college for them.  Is the goal to double down on his existing strengths and marginalize the areas where he's less strong, or are you looking for a rounded education even if he feels frustrated by it?
« Last Edit: January 12, 2024, 08:31:40 PM by roomtempmayo »

RWTL

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #15 on: January 13, 2024, 04:58:02 AM »
It's really great that you are aware and thinking through this for your child.  My son always did well in school, but had problems socializing with other kids and was bullied in elementary school.  We changed his schools twice and moved him to a private school when we moved out of state.  There he excelled in a smaller environment.  When he graduated, he selected a smaller state run college to pursue computer science and we saw him blossom during his first year.  He was going to clubs, socializing, and doing well academically.

Then COVID hit and they sent all the students home.

The changes that took place during COVID and the threat of disease really hit my son hard.  His grades declined and his anxiety spiked.  He withdrew from classes twice and we got a series of counselors to help him.  I made a number of mistakes by ramping up the pressure on him to perform better and work harder.  At the time, I didn't realize that he was likely autistic - which we now believe to be true.  In the end, he decided to not go back to school with one semester left to complete - all the humanities that he hates (e.g. Speech, Foreign Language).  DW and I continue to encourage him to go back to school, but DS is not open to the discussion.  After about 6 months of not going to school or applying for jobs, we helped him get a job at a small IT company and he has moved out of the house.  It's been difficult for him and he's learning slowly to take care of himself and his bills.  DW and I call him frequently to ask if he's paid his rent and car payment.  We're at the point where he's 95% on top of things. 

I think it is smart that you are looking for a school that will be able to help your son.  The school we chose was good, but didn't have the resources to check in on him.  If you can find one that does, it will likely benefit your family.  Doing it again, I would have liked to help figure out a way to DS through the humanities.  I wish I knew then what I know now.  I am trying to educate myself on autism so I can better understand what he is experiencing.  Our relationship was strained while he was in college, but has since greatly improved. 


MayDay

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #16 on: January 22, 2024, 05:59:26 AM »
Additionally, although he has very high grades in subjects that interest him (engineering, math, and physics so far) he has poor grades in other subjects (art, English). 

It's also worth keeping in mind that the core curriculum varies significantly across the schools you're considering.

St. Thomas is a liberal arts college that's added business and engineering schools along with all sorts of graduate programs, but the liberal arts are still the center.  Not only does that mean more reading and writing classes for everyone, it means everyone has to take philosophy and theology.  The engineering school also heavily overlaps with the Air Force ROTC program and influences the engineering culture, which may or may not work for your child.

UMD is a branch campus of a land grant state university.  The general education requirements are much thinner, and there are no philosophy or theology requirements for engineering students.  Any sort of engineering at UMD is going to be more narrowly focused than at UST.

Thinking about the ways you want your child to be challenged, as well as the ways in which they are likely to succeed, may be useful as you think about a good college for them.  Is the goal to double down on his existing strengths and marginalize the areas where he's less strong, or are you looking for a rounded education even if he feels frustrated by it?

Oh wow, mind blown. That is obvious now that you stated it but had never occurred to me!

The other possibility I think we will look at is transfer of local CC classes. I think he may be more successful taking some of the harder (for him) gen eds at CC one at a time over summer... I did that for coat reasons and found them quite easy compared to at my land grant U. That is probably easier to do with the state school.

seaborn0227

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #17 on: February 15, 2024, 06:05:55 AM »
I've started down this rabbit hole with my sophomore ADHD kid, I thought I'd mention a helpful Facebook group that you can join called "Parents of College Bound Students with Learning Disabilities, ADHD and ASD. It's run by a college consultant group, but there are some really helpful parents on there with advice and experience.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #18 on: February 20, 2024, 07:40:46 AM »
We just sent our oldest, who is high-functioning autistic, to college last fall.  Here are a few thoughts:

1) Reach out to the various universities/colleges and find out what resources are available.  Through DS's college's disability office, we were able to get a bunch of accommodations in place for him, things like an assigned seat in class, extra time for exams, a private room for exams, etc.  Before each semester, DS sends an email to each of his professors, so they have a good heads up that he's coming.  DS has a job, and we worked with the college Equal Employment Opportunity office to make sure his supervisors knew what he needed.
2) For DS, routine is hugely helpful.  DW got him a planner, and helped him map out the whole semester, entering all his classes, expected exams, etc.  For the first several weeks, she did a video call with him each Sunday to help him plan out his week, write down due dates, when exams would happen, etc.
3) I have been pleasantly surprised at how well DS has adapted to college life.  It hasn't been all smooth sailing--he had a blowup at work (that's when we got the EEO office involved), and had some very minor friction with his roommates early on, and some of his classes in non-preferred subjects have been quite a challenge.  But overall, he's done really well.
4) You have two more years before DS could go to college.  There's a good chance he'll show a LOT of growth between now and then.  That said, over the next two years, it will be very important for you to start explicitly teaching him life skills.  Driving a car (oh, goodness, teaching an autistic kid to drive, even a high-functioning one, is...something!), opening a bank account, making deposits and withdrawals, working a job, housework, how to pay bills, etc.  It's a lot easier to teach these skills when the kid's still at home :D
5) DS fortunately has a few cousins at the same college, who are able to help with transportation so he can get groceries.  He also gets a bus pass for free as a student.

joedad189

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #19 on: February 20, 2024, 07:56:13 AM »
I think you have lots of good options, even satellite state schools around MN are options. Wisconsin has reciprocity with MN so you pay just over in state tuition and there are engineering focused schools that have small class sizes and professors with office hours.

fuzzy math

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #20 on: March 27, 2024, 12:02:30 PM »
DS chose a college - University of Idaho.

Their disability center has a specific (FREE!) autism center with varying levels of academic and organizational support from 2-3x a semester to 2x a week. Huge relief on my part.

srrb

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #21 on: March 27, 2024, 12:24:09 PM »
I wanted to share this resource I found interesting: The #ActuallyAustic Guide to Advocacy  https://learnfromautistics.com/the-actuallyautistic-guide-to-advocacy/

It helped explain some of the perplexing roadblocks my child has encountered while trying to navigate and access disability services at their post-secondary. So much has been "Well, we did offer something and we mean well ..." TLDR: "nothing about me without me" should be the foundation of service development and implementation.

MayDay

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #22 on: March 31, 2024, 06:23:17 PM »
I wanted to share this resource I found interesting: The #ActuallyAustic Guide to Advocacy  https://learnfromautistics.com/the-actuallyautistic-guide-to-advocacy/

It helped explain some of the perplexing roadblocks my child has encountered while trying to navigate and access disability services at their post-secondary. So much has been "Well, we did offer something and we mean well ..." TLDR: "nothing about me without me" should be the foundation of service development and implementation.

Thank you! I'm very firmly in the "nothing about me without me" and listening to autistic adults over "experts" camp.

srrb

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Re: College for neurodivergent (ASD) young adults
« Reply #23 on: March 31, 2024, 10:31:36 PM »
And the one I'm working my way through right now: I Will Die on This Hill https://neuroclastic.com/book-review-i-will-die-on-this-hill/

I find this one a little more difficult to read because of parts of the "Autism Mom" stereotype I partook in before I knew better. The hard feels come out, lol.