avoiding the dreaded disney vaca

[try2save]

Is it expected that a child goes to Disney at least once? I am avoiding it because:

1) I have no desire to go 
2) I never went as a child and don't feel like I missed out on anything (I ended up spending 1 day there as a senior in HS and I did like Epcot)
3) It seems pretty expensive - my husband's family lives in Europe and I like to save our vaca $ for airfare (my daughter is 4 and her first trip there will be this fall - my son is six, he's been 3xs)

I feel kind of guilty that the main reason is I have no desire to go there - I am not a big vacation person, but sometimes I wonder if I project my own desires for family memories rather than what my children may enjoy.

[gdborton]

I'm sure you get the "you have to go at least once" about as much as I do.  I've never been, and don't ever plan to.  In the year that I've been working, 3 of my 7 co workers have gone, and each time a trip comes up they discuss ways to save a few hundred bucks.  These range from bringing your own princess outfits for your girls, which hotel to stay at, where to park, clothes to bring, stores to avoid etc.

[AJ]

My parents took me when I was a child. It was really fun...but not life changing or anything. The best part was that they let me bring my BFF, so it was like a week-long slumber party :) I have far more wonderful memories of the weeks we spent camping and fishing and crabbing every year than of the one time we got to go to Disneyland. Then again, we weren't really 'disney' kids. We lived on a acre and spent way more time building forts than watching TV and movies. Maybe it would have been a different experience if we had been in love with Disney characters. It probably depends on the kids, but I doubt it will traumatize them to never visit Disneyland.

[gooki]

Having flown half way around the world to go to Disneyland with my parents and brother when I was 8 - I had no more fun there than I did on the rest of my vacation. Probably the most memorable part of that vacation was going tandem kayaking in Belgium.

I'd happily NOT take my children to Disneyland. Although I suspect there will be a few theme parks in their life, as both my wife and I do enjoy them. We've been to a fair few from Lotte World in Korea, Ocean Park in Hong Kong, The Efteling  in Holland, Phantasialand in Germany etc. But we've never made a special trip just to go to one of these place, we were always going to be in the area for other reasons, so they just fell into our schedule.

[KulshanGirl]

As someone who made two epic Griswald-style road trips in the 70's to Disneyland with my family in a Starcraft pop-up tent trailer, you can bet I will be taking my daughter to Disneyland someday.  My mustachianism extends to the gates of the magic kindgom and there it stumbles.  LOL.  We are so going.  It's in the budget for a trip in 2015 or 2016, saving a little bit each month.  I will punch myself in the face in the instant photo on Splash Mountain and post it here.  While grinning. =D

[thrifted]

i have been to disneyland a ton of times and disneyworld once (thanks mom and dad... and later boyfriend!). for me, disneyland has always been a magical place.  having said that...

last thanksgiving we celebrated my niece's 5th birthday there.  we stayed at the disneyland hotel and got 3 day park hoppers. the rides old and new were amazing, i went wine tasting at california adventure, the food was disgusting.  we got a free upgrade for our already discounted room, discount tickets and brought snacks. i think about $500 savings.  but still, it wasn't anywhere near free.

it was still magical for me... but for the kids - NOT SO MUCH.  these kids are huge disney movie fans but at ages 3 and 5 nothing could beat the pool or the toy stores.  you and your toddlers will not enjoy the inescapable lines, no matter how short. 

disneyland does not have to be a significant experience when you're small.  when the kids grow up and decide they want to go, THEN go.  you'll be in retirement, they'll pay for themselves (hopefully), you'll stand by your mustachian principles, and its a win win situation all around.

[Worsted Skeins]

My parents took me to Disneyland and Disneyworld when I was a child, back in the day when one would spend a single day in the parks as opposed to having the entire vacation "experience".  My husband's parents, on the other hand, chose more natural vacations.  Thus my husband grew up swimming, hiking, sailing, etc.

We decided early on that we would rather vacation at natural parks or by visiting urban museums.  But when my husband had a business trip to Orlando where the motel had a shuttle to Disney, my son and I decided to tag along.  Actually, I am glad that we went.  My son saw through the artifice and returned with a jaded eye toward corporate merchandising.  Since much of the trip came on the company dime, it worked out.

We know several people who scrimp and save throughout the year to pay for their annual trip to Disney or go on a cruise. I think one of the reasons for their choices is the meal plan.  For many, not having to cook means a real vacation!  We may have had more options tagging along on my husband's business trips.  That and the frequent flyer miles/hotel points are lovely discounts when you can get them.

[totoro]

I never went to Disneyland as a kid.  We were poor though, and most of my friends did go. I definitely felt like I was missing out.

My kids have been to Disneyworld in Florida, Disnelyand in California and Disneyland in France.  They were pretty excited when they went, but other experiences could have replaced these trips and they are now not interested in going again.  They like the big roller coasters and sports-oriented experiences these days.

I think growing up without makes me more prone to give my kids experiences I felt I missed out on.  Both my kids have travelled a lot for a number of reasons.  I expect this will save them money when they are grown up because they may be happy to stay closer to home and concentrate on what they really enjoy.  My oldest son has  told me that he has travelled enough and is happy to stay home.

So, maybe wait until your kids are old enough to ask and then give them some choices.  They might choose a different kind of family trip.

[Russ]

I've been to Disneyworld 3 times, twice when I was really young and once in middle school. I don't remember a lick of the first two times, and only a little of the 3rd. It just wasn't anything special to me... big paved expanses of man-made entertainment and consumerism weren't my thing even back then I guess. What I do remember and absolutely loved were the trips we took to the Idlewild park in PA. It was a lot more reasonably-priced, and as a result the trips were always a lot more relaxed and the emphasis was on having fun as a family rather than trying to squeeze every last dollar of value out of a pricey Disney ticket. I also liked the big road trips we took to see different cities and historical sites.

I definitely don't think Disney is a mandatory event for a well-rounded childhood, and don't plan on going again unless my future kids ask to go, are old enough to remember the trip, and are old enough to weigh the choice against any other travel we would normally do.

[okits]

I wouldn't worry about it until they ask for it.  And once they do, if you want to make it a lesson in the costs of engaging in a massive consumer binge, make it a family activity to save for it together.  It can be a very expensive holiday.  Your kids might love it, but you may wish for them to know it was X number of foregone birthday/Christmas gifts, dinners, movie nights, toys, allowances, other vacations.  The saving period will also give you time to research the least costly ways to do to the holiday.

[happy]

Down Under  THE pilgrimage trip when I was a girl was a trip to Surfer's Paradise. We never went and I survived.  I'm not scarred permanently. I've still never been. Now its a trip to the Gold Coast to the Fun Parks.  I nearly got sucked into "you have to take the kids at least once or they'll be deprived for ever".  I priced the trip, it wasn't cheap and as I absolutely hate fun parks I decided I wouldn't be guilted into staying in a box of a motel room draggin around fun parks spending my hard earned cash. So we went some where else I wanted to go... kids survived... I don't regret this decision, but I'm sure I would've been gritting my teeth trying to smile, if I'd gone.

On the other hand if you really love that kind of thing, then save up  pay cash and go for it.

[thrifted]

after seeing posts about mustachians who don't even remember they're early disnelyand experiences, i would like to add that i have a few friends who have been bringing their babies and toddlers (yes 8 months through 4 years) regularly. why you ask?  IMHO, for a kodak moment.

after absorbing as much as i can from ERE and MMM, i've realized how frugal i have been and how much further frugally i can go.  kodak moments do not require annual passes to a park that is 200 miles away from home.  they don't even require cameras.

[grantmeaname]

they don't even require cameras

Picture of your loved ones (free) + Picture of Disneyland on Wikimedia Commons (free) + The GIMP (free) = Mustachian Kodak Moment.

[fruplicity]

No kids here, probably someday, and this decision will be hard for me. I wanted to go to disney more than ANYTHING IN THE WORLD from ages 3-9, and regularly begged my parents and asked for it for Xmas, birthdays, etc. When we saw planes fly over our house we would jump up and down in the yard and yell for them to take us to Disneyworld. My parents finally took us when I was 11 and I remember liking it but also feeling mad at them that it took them so long to take us, and I was also at that stage of starting to fee "too cool" for Disney. Yes I watched too much TV as a child and was very consumer-focused and thought my parents deprived us. (I can't believe I was ever like this but I still remember the feelings vividly...) So if my kids beg me for multiple years to do something super expensive (doesn't necessarily have to be Disney) I will probably want to compensate for my own childhood experience and accelerate whatever it is that they want and beg for year after year.

[Secret Stache]

I went to Disneyland when I was a kid but never asked to go.  My mom worked for one of the airlines at the time and got us free plane tickets and my grandma was working for a publishing company that got us free park admission so we went for the day.  Literally flew in early Saturday morning and out Saturday night.

I don't have kids yet but if they want to go to Disney I'll be more apt to go to the Disney park in Hawaii :)

[Worsted Skeins]

Haven't read the book but it appears author Chuck Thompson offers an interesting take on Disney in To Hellholes and Back: Bribes, Lies, and the Art of Extreme Tourism.

From Booklist: 

As a former editor at Maxim and Travelocity and the author of Smile When You’re Lying, a gleeful trashing of travel industry fables, Thompson is a well-traveled and street-smart kind of guy. Here he turns out a riveting, hilarious, and wildly entertaining account of trips to four destinations he has long avoided. The “hellholes” on his no-go list include the African Congo, India, Mexico City, and Walt Disney World. Readers will enjoy following his adventures and running commentary, whether he’s tangling with crooked officials in Africa, a scary mob in India, having the time of his life in Mexico City, or merely perplexed in Orlando.

[capital]

My parents took me to Disney World when I was 6, reasonably frugally. We road-tripped 4-to-a-car and stayed in motels. On that specific trip, I remember Universal Studios more. Overall, I think I have more memories from the local theme park (probably because I was old enough to enjoy the roller coaster) and family reunions, or making boats out of scrap lumber in the basement & floating them down streams.

Go if your kids actually want to and if they're old enough to remember, maybe. Don't go just because.

You can always turn your children away from Disney and into anticonsumerist leftists by teaching them about the conditions in which a lot of Disney goods are manufactured:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/law/2011/aug/27/disney-factory-sweatshop-suicide-claims
That's what my parents did.

[msmo]

I don't have kids yet but if they want to go to Disney I'll be more apt to go to the Disney park in Hawaii :)

There is no Disney amusement park in Hawaii. However, Disney recently built a resort on the island of Oahu. A very plush expensive resort at that.

I grew up about 45 minutes away from Disneyland in Anaheim, CA, and as a kid got to go quite often. Most of my memories are of fear (loud dinosaurs on the end of a peaceful train ride, a claustrophobic submarine, loud noisy pirates in the dark. The Dumbo ride was cool tho). It was probably more for taking the grandparents sight-seeing and memory-making.  I can't imagine that the marketing in the 70s would have encouraged me to ask for it.  I agree with many others that you should wait until your children express interest in going to Disney.
 

[BPA]

I dodged the Disney bullet because my ex-husband took the kids.  They had a great time, but I'm glad I didn't have to pay for it.

[smalllife]

I went to Disney as a kid and absolutely hated it.  The crowds were immense, the long lines made everybody grumpy, the attractions were just your normal theme park with costumes you recognized, etc.

If your kids aren't even asking for such a trip, why are you proposing they go?

You're on this board, which means you are capable of seeing beyond the matrix of consumer behavior - Disney is just another example of that. 

[Lauran75]

My mom was very anti-mustachian, and my dad had mustachian tendencies but acquisesed to my mom. In other words - as a kid, I went to Disneyland more times than I can remember (driving from NM, flying from MN, etc.) as well as to DisneyWorld multiple times. Of course, our family didn't limit our amusement parks to just Disney - we took in many, many different amusement parks over the years. We had as a family an all consuming love of roller-coasters. I still have an all consuming love of roller-coasters.

But about four years ago when I was visiting my dad out in CA for Christmas, he and I went to Knotsberry Farms planning on spending the day there. When we got to the ticket counter and realized that it would be over $100 for the two of us to just get in ... we both looked at each other and agreed to do something else instead. Two years ago when I was again visiting my dad in CA, we rode the roller-coaster on the pier in the town that starts with Santa near LA (can't remember the name now - has a *really* steep bridge.) That was the first time we'd ridden on a roller-coaster together in 8 years (and the last time, since he died this past June.)

I don't have any kids, and probably won't (13 days from 37..) but if I did, I'd be really hard pressed to spend the kind of money for entrance fees at most of the amusement parks. But ... I also know how much I LOVE roller-coasters, and would want my kids to have that same chance ... so I would have to really consider it carefully.

*Most of my dad's family live in CA, so our trips to see his family usually included a day at Disney and/or Universal and/or Sea World and/or ...

[NumberJohnny5]

Ok, we do disney and we do cruises.  I do try to do it as frugally as possible though.

Buy the 10 day park-hopper-water-parks-no-expiration-whatever-else-they-can-charge-you-for tickets.  Stay in a tent at Fort Wilderness (when given the option, our son loudly exclaimed his preference for camping in a tent vs staying in a nice comfy motel).  Try not to cram too much in.  Ideally you'll spend a day at the parks, then take a day off relaxing (playing in the mini water park at the resort, swimming in the heated pool, walking around and admiring all the Christmas decorations...whatever).  If you do a party (Halloween or Christmas), don't go to the park earlier in the day, that's just wasted money (you can get in as early as 4-4:30PM I think?).

We don't eat that often in the parks, maybe one special meal.  Otherwise we head back for lunch (which coincides with nap time if you have little kids, or even older kids who are exhausted) or bring lunch with us.  I admit, it does seem pretty silly to pay big bucks for Character Dining, and the next day wait for what seems like hours to meet more characters (when we could be doing, I dunno, ANYTHING ELSE!).

There are some teachable moments I suppose.  We don't buy our son any toys/trinkets/whatever at Disney; he has to buy that himself.  We explain that they put the gift shops at the end of the rides (something that is done almost everywhere you look, not limited to Disney) to try to get you to spend your money.  We take him to the Dollar Tree and Wal-Mart before we hit Disney, explain that if he really wants to buy some Disney toys, the prices are better here.  But he still sometimes buys something I don't agree with, like $10 for a Halloween Jack pen, or even more for a Mickey ghost bucket with popcorn.  I simply have to remind myself that it's his money, he may have different priorities than we do (I'm sure many things we buy seem pretty silly to him), and I want him to make his financial mistakes NOW when we're talking a few bucks here and there, instead of a few grand here and there.

Anyways...just because you're frugal doesn't mean you can't go to Disney.  It's not going to exactly be cheap...but at the same time you don't have to spend $10k to take your family of four for a week.  I mean, seriously...I see people posting saying it'll be $5k on the LOW end?  No way.  Around $55/night for camping is $385-ish, three days at the parks plus one day at the water parks for under $810 ($672.95 for 10 day park hopper water park no expiration tickets, divided by 10 to get the daily rate, times three days, times four people...the water park option is an EXTRA 10 days over and above park days, so that fourth day is a semi-freebie), other three days are spent resting at the campground; that's $1,195 for a full week in Disney.  Yeah, add in transportation if you weren't going to be there anyway (we try to combine trips), extra food costs if being in Disney turns your brain to jelly and you can't resist going out to eat vs packing a lunch, etc.  Still, there's no reason for it to cost $5k.  Why, with the difference in price (real-frugal $1,195 vs pretend-frugal at $5,000), you could go on a week long cruise....

[Skyn_Flynt]

My parents took me to DisneyWorld when I was about 12, I'd say this was 1980 or so. We stayed the whole day, left right as the electric parade began. My parents are frugal people but even they were persuaded I suppose, that it's something everyone should visit at least once.

I'm glad I got to see it, but I think I was a little "old" for some of the attractions, and would have enjoyed it a bit more when I was about 8 and still watching "World of Disney" on TV and asking to see Disney films in the theaters.

The 1 hour waits were ridiculous, I think that's been improved with the moden "appointment ticket" method since then.

[racherinh]

My best vacation memories are camping, hiking, canoeing the Lewis and Clark trail, visiting National Parks, whitewater rafting....

Disneyland is fake. Not necessary. I did go in 8th grade because my little brother had a tournament in Orlando. It was okay, but we were mostly struck at how they had a fake Utah section, which seemed sad after we had seen the real Monument Valley the year before.

Missing it should absolutely not be a cause of guilt.

[amyable]

LOL--Totally off-topic, but a "vaca" is a female cow in Spanish.  I initially read the title of this thread as, "avoiding the dreaded disney cow." 

[wearfannypacks]

Completely possible to do a Mustachian Disney adventure. Personally, I think DisneyWorld is AWESOME, but it can totally suck and eat your money if you go in blind. But, especially if you have well-trained children who realize that something is amazingly fun without having to buy expensive park food and a T-shirt.

I'm in the camp that you should totally do Disney with your kids. Just do it with some mustachian flair. Here are a few google search terms to keep in mind for the future. And may just blow your mind.

Southwest Rapid Rewards points through Chase sign on bonuses
Starwood points (you can redeem at the Swan Dolphin which is actually on Disney property)
www.ourcheapdisneyvacation.com - they could have gone even cheaper easily, but they have some great strategy for decreasing their vacation spend.
Disney YES tickets
Fort Wilderness Camp Ground
Tour guide mike - Ride Strategy (why wait longer than 15 mintues for a ride when you don't have too)

[stashette]

Haven't read the book but it appears author Chuck Thompson offers an interesting take on Disney in To Hellholes and Back: Bribes, Lies, and the Art of Extreme Tourism.

From Booklist: 

As a former editor at Maxim and Travelocity and the author of Smile When You’re Lying, a gleeful trashing of travel industry fables, Thompson is a well-traveled and street-smart kind of guy. Here he turns out a riveting, hilarious, and wildly entertaining account of trips to four destinations he has long avoided. The “hellholes” on his no-go list include the African Congo, India, Mexico City, and Walt Disney World. Readers will enjoy following his adventures and running commentary, whether he’s tangling with crooked officials in Africa, a scary mob in India, having the time of his life in Mexico City, or merely perplexed in Orlando.

This is a hilarious book, but if you read it you find out that the author leaves with a changed opinion of Disney World (and other destinations).  He found it well organized, clean, efficient, and fun.  It might be a good read if you are on the fence about going and your kids want to go. 

I wouldn't view a trip to Disney World as requirement for childhood, but it's a lot of fun.  I went there several times as a kid, and a couple as a teen/adult, and really enjoyed it.  As others mentioned it doesn't have to be super  expensive.  My mom actually bought us Disney clothing at home for cheap, and hid it until we showed up so we wouldn't ask for new stuff at the parks. 

I view it as a trip to another country.  Some stuff you may like (so clean! attention to detail) and some you may hate (buying stuff, long lines), but it's a part of the cultural experience.  Go with a "when in Rome" mindset and have your picture taken with Snow White or the knock off landmarks at Epcot.   Honestly after traveling to many of of countries featured at Epcot, I have a new appreciation for how Disney can capture idealized vignettes of a county.  There a lot to learn about the Disney customer service experience as well, a lot of which is behind the scenes. 

[clutchy]

I like Disney Land.

My parents took me as a kid and I still remember a lot of the rides.  I've been a few times as an adult and I still enjoy it.  Club 33 is a treat. 

I'll take my daughter in a year or so.  It's expensive but we're only 40 miles away so... yeah not as expensive as for most.

[Alexandria]

If you don't want to go, I wouldn't go.  The end.  One can lead a fulfilling life without experiencing the Corporate experience of Disney.   The kids will deal.

We live in California, and though my parents only took us to D-Land once, I have been several times over the years.  My spouse has family in Orlando, so have been to D-World a couple of times too.  We took our kids when they were very young because *we* wanted to go.  There is no doubt that it was for us adults more than them. 

That said, the reason we have been so many times is historically it has been a relatively frugal vacation.  We drive down and go for the day.  Since having kids we would generally spend 2 nights (quite luxurious) - in conjunction with one day in the park - which is still PLENTY if you go in the offseason and avoid the miserable crowds.  (I'd never understand going when it is crowded - sounds miserable).  Rather than stay at some ridiculously expensive hotel, there is a Motel 6 right next to the park - we'd just walk to the park - stuff like that.  (We actually usually stay with relatives or friends).

We went to D-World last fall, and the park tickets were the most expensive part of our vacation - by far.  That included flying across the country - four of us.   We decided we were done with Disney for a while.  The model they are going after these days is the "stay all week" and get the better "per day" discounts the longer you stay.  I could not find any discounts for our "two days - one day at each park" preference.  In comparison, there were endless multi-day park hopper discounts, for 4+ days.  We also had tickets from the year 2000 that we used up last year (back then their tickets did not expire).  To see how much tickets had gone up in 12 years was mindblowing.   So we kind of decided we were done.   I think it's just the way things are going.  Disney used to be a better fit for us.  But somehow along the way it had to become this whole vacation experience that lasted days and weeks.  We Can enjoy Disney for two days, but I think that is about our limit. 

[Mrs MM]

Why is it expected that they go there once?  Disney is kind of like buying a diamond engagement ring.  It's the default, don't think outside of the box, family vacation destination.

My kid had never heard of Disneyland (until recently when one of his friends went).  I've actually never been (never really heard of it when I was a kid either), but there are plenty of other cool places to go that are also unforgettable.  For example, we went to Carlsbad Caverns and our son still talks about it.  We walked in through the natural entrance and it really felt like we were exploring a new cave!  He keeps asking us to go back.  He also can't stop talking about the sand dunes national park.

For a disney-like experience, you can also go to other parks like water parks, amusement parks, etc.  When our son is older, we might take him to Canada's Wonderland one day (I had fond memories of that place as a kid).

Having said all that, I think there may be something going on with little girls and disney.  I have a boy who couldn't care less about seeing Mickey and all those characters that he finds to be baby-ish, but I do know that a lot of girls are interested in princesses, etc, so Disney may appeal to them more.  But you know what?  A cool European castle might also interest them.

So yeah, all that to say... if you don't want to go, then don't go!  :)

[marty998]

I was 12 when we went. My parents made sure they set aside enough for it, even if we had no presents for  a year ("IT'S DISNEYLAND OR A CD PLAYER...YOUR CHOICE"). All the way from Oz to Florida for the 4 Disney Parks and the 2 Universal Studios Parks. Islands of Adventure had just opened, which remains the most awesome park I have ever been to.

I think you've got to take your kids when they are old enough to remember, old enough to enjoy it, but not old enough to be a teenage ratbag who is too cool for it.

I thought I was too cool for Disney, hated the whole Tinkerbell rubbish and the "It's time to remember the magic" parades, but Ariel was pretty hot. I didn't complain when she gave me a kiss on the cheek.