Hi
@startingout ! We're about 3 years ahead of you, but I can totally commiserate! We're in Chicago and the child care costs are staggering. For context, we make ~$220k/yr and save ~$75k/yr (34%). We did a nanny-share with my sister for two years + the start of Montessori. When the 2nd kiddo arrived we transitioned to full-time Montessori infant care & daycare ($42k/yr). We're now transitioning to a play-based parochial preschool + parochial elementary school ($20k/yr, w00t!). Finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel!
I found daycare to be far less work. We had FOUR nannies the first year. The good one became unhappy, two were trouble, and the last one was just okay. I was always counseling them, managing them, or interviewing them! Daycare feeds my kids organic food for 2nd breakfast, lunch, and snack, all included in the price. They launder the accident clothing! They're only closed 5 days a year! They offer onsite piano lessons, soccer lessons, cooking lessons, and, if your kid needs help, you can arrange for the occupational/physical therapists can do the appointments onsite. Also, the nannies could give us ~9hrs/day, but daycare was open 12hrs/day. We never
used 12 hours in a day, but it was nice to have early hours available when we had a baby who was getting up with the dawn, and later hours on days when work ran late.
My sister stuck with the nanny + preschool model. They've gone through additional nannies since then. For awhile, they used Care.com to find coverage when their nanny took vacation. Then, they paid for a membership to a place that would send emergency nannies... which then were paid additionally. They're doing part-time, Catholic, play-based preschool ($7k/yr) and public elementary. The public elementary school is not working for their oldest, so, if they go back to Catholic it will be $13k/yr for both their kids, and they will STILL have nanny expenses, because they also have an infant!