I want to thank everyone for the concrete suggestions - I really appreciate it.
A couple of general comments and then I'll respond to some specific ones. My day job (fancy sysadmin) involves sitting at a computer all day, so deleting stuff from my phone won't make a difference. I don't use apps anyway, I just hit google finance as noted above, where I've "starred" VTI/VXUS/BND and my company stock so they float right to the top of the page. As noted yesterday I deleted the bookmark but I can just as easily type in the URL.
On my phone I do have Mint, or did, as I just uninstalled it. I wouldn't get rid of Mint completely as my wife and I use it extensively for tracking spending across categories and time and for checking our net income, and of course net worth. But I can do this on the desktop and I don't need it in my pocket while commuting, etc. Logging in to mint periodically to check in on these things and fix mis-categorized transactions is, I believe, a necessity for our financial life, and not checking the NW number at the very bottom of the page is something I'm going to work on. Also I don't need to do this multiple times per week, obviously.
Are you like this about other things? You might need to just take a break.
But in general, I don't try to ignore the market's machinations. That's because when it is up I'm happy because my net worth is up and when it is down I'm happy because stocks are on sale.
But I do have trouble with compulsively checking news (of all sorts) at times. Sometimes I find that I need to just take a break (especially during the work day).
3. Think about why gains make you so happy and losses bother you so much. Are you putting your investments on a pedestal where you're chasing a "number" to save you from a situation that makes you miserable? To really stop the cycle, work on being happy right now independent of your investment account.
Maybe step back a little and look at the source of this issue rather than trying to manage the symptoms.
Unless you are close to pulling the plug on your career, do the numbers actually even mean anything to you??
If the numbers really don't mean anything at this point, then why do you feel compelled to check on them so frequently?
What is motivating this? What is off in your life that is leaving a hole that you're trying to fill with net worth???
As someone who lives a pretty full but very chill life, the concept of checking on my investments seems like a tedious and pointless chore. I know ballpark how much and how long I'll need to save to reach my goals, and beyond that, I really don't give any of it much thought.
What is it you are trying to get from your numbers? What reassurance are you seeking from them, and why is it absent when they go down?
What drive motivates you to even care what they are at this point in time?
What have you emotionally tied up in this?
Okay, good points here. M'wife and I are about 9.5 years out from FIRE, +/- of course, so not close. In fact it feels forever away, which is part of the problem. I don't love my job, in fact some days I hate it and on good days I tolerate it. I could write a novella here, but suffice it to say I've struggled with job satisfaction for my whole career. Changing companies makes it better for a few months while the new job is fresh and shiny, and then it's the same old. Changing careers is something I give some thought to, but I'm not qualified to do anything else with similar income. I'm very well compensated, so taking a huge pay cut and pushing FIRE even further out is not a great option. If there was something out there that I
knew would make me happy (and be compatible with my family life) I would more strongly consider pulling the trigger, but I suspect that it would be the same at any job. At the end of the day, I don't like working. I've been ready for retirement since age 26 when I took almost 2 years off after working a high paying job for 4 years. Looking back, obviously, I wish I had cut that sabbatical a bit shorter and put more money away. To get to retirement as soon as possible sticking it out in my current career is the best option.
Get all of your investments automated so you don’t have to log in and make decisions.
Delete the stock market app on your phone
Only log in on a fixed interval - say, once a month to update your net worth spreadsheet.
Only make trades once a year to re-balance
Stop watching TV
Stop reading the financial news
Stop logging in to the forum to read the Top is In thread all the time
Download Duolingo for killing time
Get a hobby that is more interesting. I started rock climbing so I read about rock climbing and fitness related to that a lot lately.
I don't watch TV. I've actually been reading this forum a lot less recently (an infant will really clear these kinds of things out of your schedule). Similarly, no time for any hobbies right now with a 2 year old and a new baby. But I am focusing on fitness and weight loss, squeezing in quick workouts (30 minutes) before I go to work while everyone else is asleep. That's the closest I have to a hobby right now. When the new kid starts sleeping a bit better I hope to get back into a weekly Ultimate game.
I can't quite automate everything as our spending is very lumpy right now with 2 kids (one just born) and big expenses coming irregularly (house maintenance/repair, travel to see family, etc.). Every payday (every other Friday) I add up our CC balances, add a cushion for EF, and invest the balance. But just doing this every other week would be a huge improvement over my current level of checking, so that's what I'm going to strive for moving forward.
I do have a spreadsheet I use to track AA that I'm going to strive to update only quarterly, when I get a batch of company stock to sell and then re-invest. This is a good time to rebalance as well, as I'm dumping a big chunk into international in our taxable account, and usually need a corresponding move back into US and bonds in retirement accounts.
I used to watch obsessively during my working career. For me, I eventually figured out that I was illogically hoping that by watching the market it would go up sooner/faster/further. I was impatient for FIRE to happen.
This describes me to a T.
Lastly, on the asset allocation front. M'wife and I are currently 89/11 stocks/bonds. Anticipating FIRE in about 10 years I've started the first half of a 10 year bond tent to 80/20. This matches up with our risk profile, and changing our AA isn't going to help me change my behavior. Right now if the market goes down 3% we lose X amount of money off our net worth. If we decided to go 60/40, and instead of X it was X/2 or whatever (actually a bit more than that), I would still get pissed off. Also my wife doesn't really suffer from this obsession like I do (although she is also impatient to retire), so changing our AA based on my problems would be a non-starter with her.