Top is in

[Wintergreen78]

You know, with a little more bragging about losing giant sums of money, this thread would be a lot like WallStreetBets.

I was down $67,000 earlier today. Sadly only down $47k ATM. Beat that, wimps!!!
#MillionaireProblems

screenshot or it didn't happen!

I'm impressed you found an ATM that will dispense $47k.  Was it all in 20s?

Hmm, 47000 / 20 = 2350 bills.
2350 / 50 = 47 stacks.
That would fit in one backpack.
Barely a scratch!
Let us know when you need a trailer to carry the missing money.

When I got my first engineering job out of school my rent/insurance/student loans was more than my paycheck. I would take my check to the bank and cash it for stacks of 1$ bills just so I could carry the money around, to make it feel real. Then on Monday I would deposit it all on my way to work because I owed every last dollar to other people. Otherwise I was just working 60+ hours for digital money to go in and out of an account with nothing to show.

Miss those stacks... new life goal is to have a backpack full of 20 stacks. Don’t need to keep it, but just for fun for a few days. Think I can just go to the bank and ask them to fill a backpack with 20 stacks? Do you need to call ahead to get that kind of cash out at one time?

I have a backpack of money story!

In my youth my bank wanted to charge me a 50$ service fee to withdraw money from an account that I had open and transfer it to another bank.  So, after asking them to waive it and getting nowhere I told them that I wanted to withdraw all the money from my account (no service fee).  There was about 20 grand in the account, and they told me that I'd have to wait a week for them to get the money.  So I went back a week later (noticing that there were two armed guards on duty in the bank lobby that I'd never seen before) walked up to the teller, and asked for my money.  She nervously counted out the 20ish grand in quite a few stacks of bills, which I put in my backpack.  Then I rode my bike down to the other bank and tried to deposit the money in the atm.  But realized that would take forever as the ATM couldn't take many bills at once . . . so had to go in to the teller there to deposit it.

I always felt like it would have been cheaper for the bank to waive the transfer fee, but meh.

^This is heroic cheap bastardom. I sincerely applaud you.

Bank stories! When I was 18 I worked at a small town grocery store one summer. They needed extra change and small bills for the registers, so they gave me a bag and a slip with the amounts they needed. So, I walked across the street to the bank, walked in with my bag and up to the teller. I set the bag on the counter and handed her the slip. She gave me the money and I walked out with my bag of money.

The whole thing felt very weird, and 18 year old me kept waiting to get stopped by a security guard.

[Glenstache]

Bank story: I went to a local credit union and have had zero bullshit for a decade.

[ExitViaTheCashRamp]

I'm not too late to buy the dip... right ?

[dougules]

I'm not too late to buy the dip... right ?

It depends on what kind.  If we're talking French onion, definitely not to late.  If we're talking guacamole, avocados have perpetually been in short supply lately. 

[SwordGuy]

Bank stories!

I was working at a fast food restaurant during college.  The bank the store used was right next to it.   I would walk next door to cash my paycheck on my lunchbreak.

This bank was slow.  That's sssss  llllllll  ooooooooo   wwwww.

I get in line and I'm the only person in line.  There are 4 tellers.  None of them assist me.   This goes on for some minutes and now there's a line of ten people backed up behind me.

Finally, one of them decides to help customers and motions me forward.  Then they refuse to cash the check drawn on their bank because I don't have an account at that bank.

So I reply to that, speaking loudly enough for EVERYONE IN THE BANK to overhear.

"What's that you say?   You can't cash this check drawn on your bank?   Is that because you DON'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY in the bank to cover it?  Is that why?  YOU DON'T HAVE THE MONEY?"

By this time EVERYONE in the bank has ceased what they were doing and is listening VERY INTENTLY to what I'm saying.

A manager appears out of nowhere and scurries over.   

The check got cashed.

******************

A couple years go by and the store now uses a different bank a half mile away.  I'm now part time management (whoopee!  an extra ten cents an hour!) so I make occasional bank deposits for the bank.   This bank is even slower.   At the time, they were BOTH the most robbed bank and the most embezzled bank in the city.   I claimed it was just customers who got tired of waiting in slow lines.

So, I hand the deposit slip and the currency to the commercial teller.   She tells me I'm $60 short.   I know I'm not and to count it again.  This time I'm $40 short.  Nope.  Count it again.    This time the count comes up correct.

We repeat this drama (with slightly changed numbers) EVERY SINGLE TIME I take in a deposit.   The one thing that never changes is that she never, ever, claims I'm over the target number.  I'm only under the target number.   

Now, after this has happened 3 or 4 times, I pull up a chair from the lobby and sit in it while she counts and recounts and re-recounts the money.   I'm on my feet all day at work so this break is rather pleasant.

After a couple of weeks of this a bank manager comes over and asks me not to pull a chair over and sit in it because "It looks bad."

"Well, if she didn't have to count the money three times to get the correct count every time I come to visit, I wouldn't need to.   I'll note that she's never ever claimed my count was over, it's always under."

That got his attention.

Never saw that teller again.

[BicycleB]

Bank stories!

I was working at a fast food restaurant during college.  The bank the store used was right next to it.   I would walk next door to cash my paycheck on my lunchbreak.

This bank was slow.  That's sssss  llllllll  ooooooooo   wwwww.

I get in line and I'm the only person in line.  There are 4 tellers.  None of them assist me.   This goes on for some minutes and now there's a line of ten people backed up behind me.

Finally, one of them decides to help customers and motions me forward.  Then they refuse to cash the check drawn on their bank because I don't have an account at that bank.

So I reply to that, speaking loudly enough for EVERYONE IN THE BANK to overhear.

"What's that you say?   You can't cash this check drawn on your bank?   Is that because you DON'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY in the bank to cover it?  Is that why?  YOU DON'T HAVE THE MONEY?"

By this time EVERYONE in the bank has ceased what they were doing and is listening VERY INTENTLY to what I'm saying.

A manager appears out of nowhere and scurries over.   

The check got cashed.

******************

A couple years go by and the store now uses a different bank a half mile away.  I'm now part time management (whoopee!  an extra ten cents an hour!) so I make occasional bank deposits for the bank.   This bank is even slower.   At the time, they were BOTH the most robbed bank and the most embezzled bank in the city.   I claimed it was just customers who got tired of waiting in slow lines.

So, I hand the deposit slip and the currency to the commercial teller.   She tells me I'm $60 short.   I know I'm not and to count it again.  This time I'm $40 short.  Nope.  Count it again.    This time the count comes up correct.

We repeat this drama (with slightly changed numbers) EVERY SINGLE TIME I take in a deposit.   The one thing that never changes is that she never, ever, claims I'm over the target number.  I'm only under the target number.   

Now, after this has happened 3 or 4 times, I pull up a chair from the lobby and sit in it while she counts and recounts and re-recounts the money.   I'm on my feet all day at work so this break is rather pleasant.

After a couple of weeks of this a bank manager comes over and asks me not to pull a chair over and sit in it because "It looks bad."

"Well, if she didn't have to count the money three times to get the correct count every time I come to visit, I wouldn't need to.   I'll note that she's never ever claimed my count was over, it's always under."

That got his attention.

Never saw that teller again.

Wow! Bad Bank Meets Loud Customer - @SwordGuy edition!

[dragoncar]

You know, with a little more bragging about losing giant sums of money, this thread would be a lot like WallStreetBets.

I was down $67,000 earlier today. Sadly only down $47k ATM. Beat that, wimps!!!
#MillionaireProblems

screenshot or it didn't happen!

I'm impressed you found an ATM that will dispense $47k.  Was it all in 20s?

Hmm, 47000 / 20 = 2350 bills.
2350 / 50 = 47 stacks.
That would fit in one backpack.
Barely a scratch!
Let us know when you need a trailer to carry the missing money.

When I got my first engineering job out of school my rent/insurance/student loans was more than my paycheck. I would take my check to the bank and cash it for stacks of 1$ bills just so I could carry the money around, to make it feel real. Then on Monday I would deposit it all on my way to work because I owed every last dollar to other people. Otherwise I was just working 60+ hours for digital money to go in and out of an account with nothing to show.

Miss those stacks... new life goal is to have a backpack full of 20 stacks. Don’t need to keep it, but just for fun for a few days. Think I can just go to the bank and ask them to fill a backpack with 20 stacks? Do you need to call ahead to get that kind of cash out at one time?

I have a backpack of money story!

In my youth my bank wanted to charge me a 50$ service fee to withdraw money from an account that I had open and transfer it to another bank.  So, after asking them to waive it and getting nowhere I told them that I wanted to withdraw all the money from my account (no service fee).  There was about 20 grand in the account, and they told me that I'd have to wait a week for them to get the money.  So I went back a week later (noticing that there were two armed guards on duty in the bank lobby that I'd never seen before) walked up to the teller, and asked for my money.  She nervously counted out the 20ish grand in quite a few stacks of bills, which I put in my backpack.  Then I rode my bike down to the other bank and tried to deposit the money in the atm.  But realized that would take forever as the ATM couldn't take many bills at once . . . so had to go in to the teller there to deposit it.

I always felt like it would have been cheaper for the bank to waive the transfer fee, but meh.

Did you walk into the other bank and yell “this is a reverse robbery, take the money out of the bag!”

[Heckler]

^This is heroic cheap bastardom. I sincerely applaud you.

I have a backpack of money story!

I applaud this level of pettiness, and would absolutely do the same thing in your shoes.

I have a petty, heroic cheap bastardess story!


Backstory - British Columbia has a non-refundable ECO fee on all electronics.   It applies to anything electrical that becomes junk and "should" get recycled.

https://www.return-it.ca/electronics/faqs/ehf/?gclid=CjwKCAjwy7CKBhBMEiwA0Eb7au0HKYsKSZ4zC-VMbIclGMjYYnxYkjXhgNXaD5Q-3LahvNyYMS1wTxoChb0QAvD_BwE

Well, my lovely wife goes to London Drugs at her lunch hour and is thrilled to finally find a manual milk frother (no batteries, no electronics) for our cappuccinos.    It costs like, $20 or so (~15 Greenbacks), and looks something like this, just not as fancy:

https://bigamart.com/product/biesse-casa-l208-c01-cremafacile-cream-maker-with-wooden-knob-and-spice-dispenser-white30-x-4-5-x-19-5-cm/?gclid=CjwKCAjwy7CKBhBMEiwA0Eb7andalCKXc5QaoUA4ZueRWA1gJ-AkOqKRPbJdBzbDzy8d35Rpt7FdBxoCnUwQAvD_BwE


She checks out at the teller, looks at her receipt, and sees that they've charged her an ECO fee, a whole $0.25 northern dollars!   Most would keep walking.

But, nooo...  she brings it back to the teller, asking why a manual device without electronics or batteries has an ECO fee.  Teller says "sorry, that's what the system says".  Not good enough, please let me talk to the manager.  "sorry, the manager isn't in, but he'll be in later this afternoon."

So, she heads back to work, waits for the manager to come in, goes back to London Drugs to talk to manager.    The manager says, "sorry, the system is set up that way because it has a metal part in it".    Dearest wife say's "bullshit, why does this fork you also sell not have an ECO fee?!  Please investigate this."      So manager says OK.

The NEXT day, dearest wife heads back and asks to see the manager again!  Apparently, the sales system indeed was agreed to be a mistake, the manual milk frother should not have the ECO fee applied.  The manager offers to refund her the  $0.25, which she happily accepts a quarter in return.

And then dearest wife drops the quarter into the donation bin at the cashier, thanking the manager for fixing the problem in their system and proudly walking away.






Oddly, I couldn't find the same milk frother for sale there today, only shitty battery-operated ones that bend within a month, or get dead batteries that need replacing.    But I'll always be proud of her!
 
https://www.londondrugs.com/fresco-frother---fef7/L0271325.html?gclid=CjwKCAjwy7CKBhBMEiwA0Eb7agnm9wOPf0quvEk7hsSUR3DWH7kLqdjiV9q4V_WuvvHv11Of6-NRqxoCauMQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

[Heckler]

PS - Milk Frother Top is in.

[RWD]

The NEXT day, dearest wife heads back and asks to see the manager again!  Apparently, the sales system indeed was agreed to be a mistake, the manual milk frother should not have the ECO fee applied.  The manager offers to refund her the  $0.25, which she happily accepts a quarter in return.

And then dearest wife drops the quarter into the donation bin at the cashier, thanking the manager for fixing the problem in their system and proudly walking away.

Epic!

[Radagast]

PS - Milk Frother Top is in.

Sounds like a good application for liquid assets.
Things have been seeming rather frothy recently.
The cream always rises until the top is in.

[solon]

Can we get back to all-time-high Friday's please?

[dougules]

Can we get back to all-time-high Friday's please?

What part of "top is in" do you not understand?  No more all-time highs.

[Steeze]

Can we get back to all-time-high Friday's please?

What part of "top is in" do you not understand?  No more all-time highs.

losses, he meant all time high losses

[dragoncar]

Can we get back to all-time-high Friday's please?

[techwiz]

Top is in!

[BigMoneyJim]

Can we get back to all-time-high Friday's please?

But it's October. We don't do those in October. Everybody knows that.

[FIRE Artist]

Can we get back to all-time-high Friday's please?

But it's October. We don't do those in October. Everybody knows that.

Can you PM me the next Powerball winning numbers?

[BicycleB]

Can we get back to all-time-high Friday's please?

But it's October. We don't do those in October. Everybody knows that.

Can you PM me the next Powerball winning numbers?

Now that there will never be any more tops, I knew this thread would find a surefire way to wealth.

[Exflyboy]

My first buy point (re-allocation) will be at 10% down so 4081 on the S&P..

You read it here first so everybody do something different..:)

[Roland of Gilead]

I don't think it is going that low.   Inflation is very high, running something around 6% this year which means bonds are still horrible and all the money flows into risk assets on any dip (otherwise you are just locking in guaranteed losses with bonds).

Maybe, maybe it touches 4200.

[Glenstache]

Don't forget the game plan. Top is in.

[Exflyboy]

I don't think it is going that low.   Inflation is very high, running something around 6% this year which means bonds are still horrible and all the money flows into risk assets on any dip (otherwise you are just locking in guaranteed losses with bonds).

Maybe, maybe it touches 4200.

Yeah I want to reduce my allocation to VBTLX given the opportunity... I.e Stocks take a correction.

[dragoncar]

Top may be in, but it's DIVIDEND TIME YALL

[secondcor521]

Top may be in, but it's DIVIDEND TIME YALL

But but ammo, gold, and Beanie Babies don't pay dividends...?

[boarder42]

Top may be in, but it's DIVIDEND TIME YALL

But but ammo, gold, and Beanie Babies don't pay dividends...?

you should be staking those beanie babies!

[Bateaux]

I don't think it is going that low.   Inflation is very high, running something around 6% this year which means bonds are still horrible and all the money flows into risk assets on any dip (otherwise you are just locking in guaranteed losses with bonds).

Maybe, maybe it touches 4200.

Yeah I want to reduce my allocation to VBTLX given the opportunity... I.e Stocks take a correction.

I've got a significant portion of VBTLX I'd lije to shed.  Hopefully we get a full on correction. 

[PDXTabs]

I don't think it is going that low.   Inflation is very high, running something around 6% this year which means bonds are still horrible and all the money flows into risk assets on any dip (otherwise you are just locking in guaranteed losses with bonds).

Maybe, maybe it touches 4200.

Yeah I want to reduce my allocation to VBTLX given the opportunity... I.e Stocks take a correction.

I've got a significant portion of VBTLX I'd lije to shed.  Hopefully we get a full on correction.

What is the debt standoff going to do to your VBTLX?

[JJ-]

I'm pretty disappointed in this latest version of the top. I checked and I only have $50 of losses in one lot available to harvest. Not even worth the effort.

[JJ-]

I don't think it is going that low.   Inflation is very high, running something around 6% this year which means bonds are still horrible and all the money flows into risk assets on any dip (otherwise you are just locking in guaranteed losses with bonds).

Maybe, maybe it touches 4200.

Yeah I want to reduce my allocation to VBTLX given the opportunity... I.e Stocks take a correction.

I've got a significant portion of VBTLX I'd lije to shed.  Hopefully we get a full on correction.

What is the debt standoff going to do to your VBTLX?

I am genuinely curious about this scenario.

[maizefolk]

I don't worry about the US defaulting on its debt or what that might do to my investments until I start reading headlines from serious people™ about platinum coin seigniorage as the answer to avoiding default.

[PDXTabs]

I don't worry about the US defaulting on its debt or what that might do to my investments until I start reading headlines from serious people™ about platinum coin seigniorage as the answer to avoiding default.

How many US Marshals would escort the Secretary of the Treasury to walk the $1T coin over? Or would it be Secret Service?

[SwordGuy]

I don't worry about the US defaulting on its debt or what that might do to my investments until I start reading headlines from serious people™ about platinum coin seigniorage as the answer to avoiding default.

If the Republicans block the debt ceiling raise and the country would default because of that, it's the President's CONSTITUTIONAL DUTY to issue a coin to prevent default on our debt.

See the 14th Amendment:

"The validity of the public debt of the United States, authorized by law, including debts incurred for payment of pensions and bounties for services in suppressing insurrection or rebellion, shall not be questioned."

The government is constitutionally required to pay its debts. So if the only way to do it is to issue said coin, said coin HAS to be issued.

[Roland of Gilead]

I don't worry about the US defaulting on its debt or what that might do to my investments until I start reading headlines from serious people™ about platinum coin seigniorage as the answer to avoiding default.

If the Republicans block the debt ceiling raise and the country would default because of that, it's the President's CONSTITUTIONAL DUTY to issue a coin to prevent default on our debt.

See the 14th Amendment:

"The validity of the public debt of the United States, authorized by law, including debts incurred for payment of pensions and bounties for services in suppressing insurrection or rebellion, shall not be questioned."

The government is constitutionally required to pay its debts. So if the only way to do it is to issue said coin, said coin HAS to be issued.

Oh history.

"The votes to raise the debt ceiling -- there have been 10 since 2001 -- are famous for political posturing. Our research showed that President Obama is no exception. Back in 2006, he joined with other Senate Democrats to vote against raising the debt limit, a measure supported by President George W. Bush. "The fact that we are here today to debate raising America's debt limit is a sign of leadership failure. It is a sign that the U.S. Government can't pay its own bills," Obama said."

[JJ-]

I don't worry about the US defaulting on its debt or what that might do to my investments until I start reading headlines from serious people™ about platinum coin seigniorage as the answer to avoiding default.

Brilliant. I can't believe I didn't think about this sooner.

[secondcor521]

I don't worry about the US defaulting on its debt or what that might do to my investments until I start reading headlines from serious people™ about platinum coin seigniorage as the answer to avoiding default.

Published in 2013, about 8 1/2 years ago, although I did see the idea mentioned in another more recent article.

Outdated Article Citation Top Is In.

[JJ-]

I don't worry about the US defaulting on its debt or what that might do to my investments until I start reading headlines from serious people™ about platinum coin seigniorage as the answer to avoiding default.

Published in 2013, about 8 1/2 years ago, although I did see the idea mentioned in another more recent article.

Outdated Article Citation Top Is In.

Ceiling is in?

[PDXTabs]

Oh history.

"The votes to raise the debt ceiling -- there have been 10 since 2001 -- are famous for political posturing. Our research showed that President Obama is no exception. Back in 2006, he joined with other Senate Democrats to vote against raising the debt limit, a measure supported by President George W. Bush. "The fact that we are here today to debate raising America's debt limit is a sign of leadership failure. It is a sign that the U.S. Government can't pay its own bills," Obama said."

Back when it was only $8.6 trillion! That's nothing! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1hCLBTD5RM

[dividendman]

I don't know much about American politicians, but one thing I do know is this: they are generally rich, and they generally have rich friends. If the US does "default" aka doesn't pay some crap it's supposed to and the market takes a 20% shit, the debt ceiling will be raised/eliminated the next day.

It's such a silly thing to have a debt ceiling... no spending ceiling, but a debt ceiling... Oh politicians, you are a funny bunch.

Politician funniness top is in?

[SwordGuy]

Politician funniness top is in?

There is no known upper limit for stupidity.   It appears to have an infinite capacity for realization.

[PDXTabs]

Why did the market pop on Friday? Because that's when my 401k buy goes in, that's why.

[Travis]

I don't know much about American politicians, but one thing I do know is this: they are generally rich, and they generally have rich friends. If the US does "default" aka doesn't pay some crap it's supposed to and the market takes a 20% shit, the debt ceiling will be raised/eliminated the next day.

It's such a silly thing to have a debt ceiling... no spending ceiling, but a debt ceiling... Oh politicians, you are a funny bunch.

Politician funniness top is in?

It serves no purpose other than to play brinksmanship.  All it accomplishes is screwing with people down the food chain and making things more expensive in the long run. 

[DadJokes]

I don't know much about American politicians, but one thing I do know is this: they are generally rich, and they generally have rich friends. If the US does "default" aka doesn't pay some crap it's supposed to and the market takes a 20% shit, the debt ceiling will be raised/eliminated the next day.

It's such a silly thing to have a debt ceiling... no spending ceiling, but a debt ceiling... Oh politicians, you are a funny bunch.

Politician funniness top is in?

It serves no purpose other than to play brinksmanship.  All it accomplishes is screwing with people down the food chain and making things more expensive in the long run.

It serves some purpose, some sort of limit on how far in debt we're allowed to go. It's useless, since they just vote to raise the ceiling rather than actually address the problem.

[talltexan]

Why did the market pop on Friday? Because that's when my 401k buy goes in, that's why.

I haven't done any systematic back-testing, but it sure seems like the market is up on the days my pay-check hits my 401K.

[Edubb20]

100% the case.  Every one of my Friday paydays the market is up. I laugh each time, then down Monday. Are we being fed on without knowing it?

[DadJokes]

I think it's similar to how the weather is beautiful during the work week but rains on the weekend here.

A higher power is just letting us know that we're not in control.

The higher power is the Top, of course

[Steeze]

I think it's similar to how the weather is beautiful during the work week but rains on the weekend here.

A higher power is just letting us know that we're not in control.

The higher power is the Top, of course

I parked my car in an open parking lot at work one time as a teenager, no trees around, just open parking lot with a bunch of other cars. When I left work my car had about 500 bird poops on it. No one else's car had bird poop on them, just my car. I knew where I stood with the higher power at that moment. Has been about 15-20 years since then and I am still bitter about it.

[dougules]

I think it's similar to how the weather is beautiful during the work week but rains on the weekend here.

A higher power is just letting us know that we're not in control.

The higher power is the Top, of course

I parked my car in an open parking lot at work one time as a teenager, no trees around, just open parking lot with a bunch of other cars. When I left work my car had about 500 bird poops on it. No one else's car had bird poop on them, just my car. I knew where I stood with the higher power at that moment. Has been about 15-20 years since then and I am still bitter about it.

Is your avatar related?

[Radagast]

I think it's similar to how the weather is beautiful during the work week but rains on the weekend here.

A higher power is just letting us know that we're not in control.

The higher power is the Top, of course

I parked my car in an open parking lot at work one time as a teenager, no trees around, just open parking lot with a bunch of other cars. When I left work my car had about 500 bird poops on it. No one else's car had bird poop on them, just my car. I knew where I stood with the higher power at that moment. Has been about 15-20 years since then and I am still bitter about it.

That's because your not on top.

[dragoncar]

100% the case.  Every one of my Friday paydays the market is up. I laugh each time, then down Monday. Are we being fed on without knowing it?

If this were actually true, you could make a nice arbitrage by buying your Friday contribution on Thursday (on margin) and then selling Friday.