daggify, I think chucking fear can work, especially when starting to invest small amounts. At this point, you contributions are going to blow out of the water any balance variations up or down due to market conditions. This will slowly change over time, though. Eventually market changes dwarf contributions. That can make a risk-averse person panic and do dumb stuff. You need to basically ignore your day to day balance changes and gain faith in your strategy so you don't bail on it later. Pick an asset allocation that objectively makes sense (check!). Then don't fuck with it. Don't check your balances more than once per month, but I recommend quarterly. Don't sweat market drops, expect them. Rebalance annually, and automate that if you can. You are investing with a 30+ year time horizon, even if you plan to be FI in 10 years. "Set it and forget it" is your very. best. friend. This will lower the amount of "sheer force of will" you need to keep it going.
You can always consider a different asset allocation in FI. I'm comfy chasing high returns at 90% stock and 10% REIT during the "accumulation" phase I'm. I think my risk tolerance will change when I walk away from employment and enter the "drawdown" phase. I'll want to hang on to what I've got, but keep some big chunk in the market to be sure it doesn't run out. Haven't worked out that split yet, but I have a few more years. Just know that is down the road.
Congrats on the increased income. You may want to do a separate case study thread on these forums to ensure your other finances are optimized given your income changes. Focusing on reducing taxes is a good idea! At this higher income and 15% contribution rate you will likely max your 401k limit of 18k this year. Congtratulations! Is a 401k or other tax deferred account available to your wife? If you file jointly, can she contribute 100% of her money to it? It will reduce your marginal joint tax rate. Your income is too high for traditional IRA, and probably too high for Roth.
You mention minimum payments on car notes. You are paying highest interest rate debts first, right? Keep killing that debt. If you haven't seen Eric222's journal called My life is an exploding volcano of awesomeness, check it out. He's killing huge debt and growing income, too, just started 401k investing. I love his quote "Stamina is the next level of badassity."
Where did you put the red flags? They were so pretty. Did you pass them on to someone else?