Just to update and close out this thread: Finally decided that calling out the Well guys needed to be done. The diagnosis was multiple points where things could be clogged up with the crud from my well. I decided to go ahead and replace the well pump based on age and results, the air guage on the tank and the plumbing from the tank to where it merges with the in house lines.
This is what I learned- the main valve connecting pressure tank to house was plugged to a hole less than a pencil width. Even with adequate pressure, the water was choked off before it entered the interior pipes. The air valve, which turns out to be a float, was completely covered in red colored gunk. The 23 year old pump itself came out of the hole serverely coated in gunk, and had its pumping ability diminished from the intake... it is impressive it lasted this long. The baffles at 20 and 40 ft which allow air in to the system were also gunked up. So we replaced the pump, the wiring down to the pump, the air valve and the first 3 ft of plumbing inside the house. It now has a better positioned shut off valve.
As we brought the system back to life, it was pumping nasty brown water that looked worse than the water at Sochi. as we made our way around the house faucets, the well guy said "OK, here is a well guy trick... many of your faucetts have restrictors on them to control pressure at 1 gallon a minute... since you are a well owner who keeps his eye on the water table, I am going to remove them..." which pumped up volume in spigots I have never seen that kind of pressure in. In some faucets it was a small gasket, in others a disc. Not recommended to remove for those on billable city water or in drought prone areas. As I garden and manage several rain barrels for grey water during the summer, I fell like I can live without restrictors on my faucets without killing off some snail darters in California!
For those interested, the pump swap out, which included having a snow plow across my front yard so they could get the truck to the head was $1600. New wiring 140 feet down to the pump, the new plumbing, shut off and pressure valves pushed the total invoice to $2195... hopfully the last time I have this expense while we are in this home. I still need to burb more brown water out of the system, and this is NOT the time to wash my wifes "corporate clothes" unless I am wanting to put out another $2000- but this time to Nordstroms!
Thanks everyone for your comments. They added value to my thought process and hopefully this post benifits someone else down the line who hears "How come the shower isn't working right?"
