Two big-picture thoughts:
1. Track your spending. You are missing a lot of categories, and what you have is largely guesswork. You can't make a plan to get you where you want until you know what your current lifestyle is costing you.
2. What is your priority here? You have a lot of things listed here, and each of them costs money:
- Second child on the way
- A third child
- College funds
- Another business
- Both of you changing jobs down the road, including potential paycuts
- And finally, presumably, FIRE
You make very good money, but not enough to cover everything you want AND still FIRE in the near future. So you need to get a little more nuts-and-bolts about those priorities. I am assuming the children are the top priority; more kids = more daycare and clothes and medical and all that, so figure out the buget hit, both short-term and long-term. What about college costs? What's your plan there? Are you going to contribute a set amount and let the kids figure out the rest; are you planning to cover in-state tuition; are you willing to send them wherever they want? Figure out the goal, then figure out what that requires out of your monthly budget to get there. What about the storage business -- how much up-front, what are the carrying costs, what's the expected income, how much time and mental energy will it take that you can't devote to other things? And what about FIRE? Is the goal to quit entirely, or just to be in a position to walk away from the career track and do your own thing? If you guys want to go out on your own, including a big paycut for your wife, then you need to have the finances lined up over the next few years -- sufficient savings to tide you over if things go south, low annual expenses so you can keep saving -- so that you are in a position to do that.
One specific comment: at your income levels, you should be maxing out your 401(k)s before you fund your Roths. Ideally you can do both, but if you have to choose, the tax deduction now will benefit more you long-term.